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lavendertears78 · 1 year
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It's not an "abandoned" WIP, I didn't intentionally leave it in the forest to die and forget about it, it is a lost wip who wandered into the forest despite my pleas not to. I sit at the edge of the forest every day and hear it calling for help but there is nothing I can do. It is a haunting wip
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lavendertears78 · 1 year
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lavendertears78 · 1 year
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My fatal flaw is that I'll write vague notes with the assumption that they'll jog my memory enough to remember my exact intent, despite the fact that I need to take notes to remember stuff. Like what the hell is this supposed to mean
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lavendertears78 · 1 year
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theres a lot of stuff in life that can be categorized as 'a sick joke' but the fact that fondant doesnt even taste good is pretty high up there for me
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lavendertears78 · 1 year
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*constantly talks about writing*
*actually hasn't touched any of my projects for a week*
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lavendertears78 · 1 year
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lavendertears78 · 2 years
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Time to go Home
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lavendertears78 · 2 years
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I think the funniest story I have of Lowe's is when I was doing returns. I can't remember what this contractor was returning but it was either awkward or heavy (or both) so I was helping him get it off or out of his cart. He's got his phone pinned between his face and his shoulder and he's arguing with someone, either another contractor or the person he's contracted to, something about windows, so he's fairly distracted, right?
Our hands wound up brushing and all of a sudden I've got his undivided attention and he just blurts out, "oh fuck your hands are soft!" And then looks like he wishes he could shove those words right back into his mouth, and before I can even scramble to come up with a response, his face twisted into like a very deadpan mocking face and he said, "does it SOUND like I'm talking to you? Are we within hands touching distance? Oh God I hope so, so you can feel how soft THESE hands aren't."
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lavendertears78 · 2 years
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queer is literally a slur. like you’ve never been called that in a derogatory context like most lgbt people? you think your experiences escaping homophobia make it okay to justify the use of a homophobic slur?
queer is an identity.
it has also been used as a slur. there is no denying that. but using a word as a slur does not make it a slur. because before queer is a slur it is an identity. before it is derogatory it is a label. the use of queer as an identity is infinitely more important than the use of queer as a slur because the people who identify as queer are infinitely more important than the people who use queer as a slur.
say a lot of people decided they hated me. despised me. were disgusted by me to the point where my own name became a slur. would you tell me not to say it? would you tell me i could no longer be helena, and instead must come up with a euphemism for the name that belonged to me decades before it belonged in the mouths of bigots?
because that would make you an enabler.
you would tell me i can’t say my name anymore because some lowlife decided he could use it to insult me?
you would tell a gay man that he can’t be gay anymore because some teens in the early 2000’s started calling everything they didn’t like “gay”, and now he has to say “same sex oriented male identifying individual”?
does that enrage you? because it should. that’s exactly how you sound.
you are telling me i cannot use my label. you are telling me that when my great-uncle shouted until his face was red and he spat tobacco and the word queer at my feet, he was right. he was right to insult me, and i was wrong to say my name.
you are shitting on every single one of our predecessors. you are slandering every person who fought for their rights to exist and and be tolerated and be celebrated in their countries, every person who was lost to the aids epidemic, every person whose country criminalizes love and gender expression, every child whose parents abandoned them for straying from the norm, every person who was born and will die in the closet longing to be themselves. the queer umbrella is a safety net, a security blanket, the comfort of being known without being pressured to tell. it is near and dear and important as fuck to every member of the lgbt+ community and you are a blight upon the earth you walk.
how dare you speak upon my experiences with homophobia. how dare you disguise your own homophobia as activism. and how fucking dare you have the audacity to come to my blog and hide behind an anonymous ask and preach to me about how i’m oppressing myself. go look at the fucking wikipedia page for queer and read about how 1980s lgbt+ activists, especially lgbt+ people of color, fought to call themselves queer in a world that still hates peculiar things. and here you are forty years later spitting queer back at their feet.
i don’t give a fuck if people start using my name as a slur. my name is still helena. i will not change it. i chose it, i like it, and it belongs to me. it does not belong to bigots no matter how badly they want it. your discomfort with my identity is not my fucking problem.
i am helena. i am queer. die mad & go fuck yourself
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lavendertears78 · 3 years
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first nations institute is doing a match for match with donations rn if you have the means to donate; it goes to native american communities who need funding for health & food programs!!
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lavendertears78 · 3 years
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it's so fucked that no one experiences music in the same way and that humans are shit at verbalising their emotions so we will never truly be able to talk about how our favourite song feels or why that chord makes you cry or why that riff makes my heart start beating faster. how fucked is that.
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lavendertears78 · 3 years
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"adults trying to stay "hip" and keep up with youth culture and being years late is so cringey"
adult secret: its all intentional. nothing will prepare you for how fun it is to watch a teenagers face as you dab at them. i will floss when they least expect it and I will love every second of their horror.
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lavendertears78 · 3 years
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Every time I think about the entry level job paradox my head feels like it’s gonna explode.
Whenever I think about all the people that didn’t hire me to be a busser because I didn’t have any restaurant experience even though it’s the lowest ranking job in the restaurant I feel a dangerous urge to strangle a hiring manager.
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lavendertears78 · 3 years
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hot take uh
dont get mad at trans ppl for using the “wrong”/out of date terminology to describe their own experiences like
if a trans dude says “back when i was a girl” or “i was born in the wrong body” just. let them. if they feel it describes their experiences the best, then it’s good for them
as long as theyre not using it to describe other people who may not be comfortable with, it’s ok
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lavendertears78 · 3 years
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anytime someone talks about “double texting” im just like. sorry. cant relate. every single person i actually text will receive 14 texts in a row at 11pm about whatever random thing im thinking about
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lavendertears78 · 3 years
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lavendertears78 · 3 years
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Buggy: Straw Hat Luffy, my old arch enemy.
Shanks: I thought I was your arch enemy.
Buggy: I have a life outside of you, Shanks.
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