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levelsstudiofitness-blog · 6 years

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STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP!!

Physical Fitness Training isn’t just about you being fit. It’s about becoming the best version of yourself when pushed to the max. I have women (and some men) to tell me when I ask how their eating habits are: “oh yeah, I did bad with my eating for a day or three because......” and I wait for them to fill in the blank. However, it’s the priceless look on their faces when I open my mouth and respond not of a usual personal trainer.

My mentality to fitness coaching is that: YOU DIDN’T GAIN WEIGHT OVERNIGHT, YOU’RE NOT GOING TO LOSE WEIGHT OVERNIGHT. I am not going to bash you about your eating habits. I am going to coach you on the HOW’S, WHEN’S, WHERE’S, WHY’S. There’s a lot that goes into living a healthier lifestyle and I’m not speaking solely on the physical. There’s a mental and emotional part one must go through. Women and those of the special population can definitely relate. I sure can.

After my transformation in becoming a superhuman, I was always so hard on myself about what I thought I should be doing compared to my counterparts that did not have to undergo the surgery of being a partial amputee. All I wanted to do was feel what is deemed by society as “being normal”. I would beat myself up a lot because I have such high expectations being so strong willed and self determined to take whatever “I CAN’Ts” and making them “I CANs”. So, whenever I got delayed in the progress of something I was trying to accomplish-now having a bionic leg and learning how to adjust (like not being able to do squats), I would get really frustrated and angry with myself.

STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP!! I had to really work on the mental and emotional parts of fitness training to learn that even though I don’t crush my mark each time and my goal progressions may get pushed back, I can’t talk down to myself because of a transformation that my body has to learn all over again the basic fundamentals (like walking up and down the stairs, how to properly sit in a chair instead of flopping down because my nervous system hadn’t learn how to communicate that to my brain signals).

Now that I am a certified personal trainer, I have the ability to say with authority (because I understand from which that thought process comes from):

STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP!!!

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levelsstudiofitness-blog · 7 years

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NEVER JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER: OUT THE EYES OF A CANCER SURVIVOR

The History-

Going through cancer was a definite and infinite game changer for me. I was diagnosed with osteosarcoma cancer, otherwise known as bone cancer, at the age of 23. That was pretty late in the game seeing that this type of cancer’s age range is 0-18. My theory of how I got this cancer will be discussed in another blog. The way I discovered I had cancer was actually having left a doctor’s appt one day-a well woman’s exam-go figure. I didn’t have a vehicle at the time so I had to take public transportation. After my appointment, I decided I would go the mall not too far from where I lived. It was a cloudy day as it had just rained a couple hrs before so the ground was a bit saturated with the left over water that had gathered in puddles in some places. I came to the bus stop right in front of the local mall, which used to be called Sharpstown Mall, and as I stepped down on the glazed-like tile of the walk way, I slipped and fell. As I tried to get up, I cried aloud in excruciating pain while holding my leg. I attempted to get up again, and again fell down this time tears streaming down as I was both in pain and scared because I had never felt the type of pain I was feeling at that moment. The people standing by just looked and walked by. Finally one kneeled down and asked if I was okay; if I need help getting up. The man attempted to assist me, but the pain was too much. He asked if he should call 911. I told him yes because I couldn’t move. I was taken to the closest hospital which was right around the corner from the mall. They got me in to do the x-rays on my right and left lower extremity. My boyfriend from college at the time had made it to the hospital while I was awaiting the results back from the x-rays. We made light of the situation, joking that I was being clumsy. The nurse came in and said I have to tell you that while we were searching to see if you had a broken bone we saw a large tumor.

3 ½ years prior to this finding, I had was given the birth control depo-provera (or deh-poh for short) 3 days after giving birth to my 2nd daughter at the time. I had taken this birth control for about 6 months and after having stop taking it, I started to notice swelling and pain in the same leg the x-rays highlighted the mass tumor. I had extreme weight gain after taking the depo birth control, which is one of its side effects, so I chalked the swelling to possibly having fluid in the knees as it would go and come. 2 yrs later, I begin to notice that simple tasks in my early twenties began to feel as though I had skipped to my latter years as I could barely squat, run, jump, or climb up a set of stairs. Fast forward and it was a malignant tumor, aggressively eating away at my tibia, or leg bone.

Where and what treatments I had-

I was fortunate to be able to be seen at the world-renown MD Anderson here in Houston, Tx. I was sent to MD Anderson by the reputable trauma center, Ben Taub Hospital. Ben Taub was the one to do the biopsy on my tumor. The doctors wanted to operate thinking it was a benign, except one posed this realistic scare that had everyone thinking twice about doing so: he told me that even though in their opinion, the tumor appeared to be benign, they have no former experience with something of this magnitude and were not willing to take the risk as it would become a liability if I were to be operated on and it was in fact a malignant cell. After a week in the hospital, they finally got a response from the oncologists at MD Anderson that it was in fact an aggressive tumor and no further action should be taken by the trauma center. I got to MD Anderson doing the whole process over of multiple tests, x-rays, CT scans, MRIs, and blood work. I was told I would need to undergo chemotherapy for a year and a half to ensure the tumorous cells where gone and that once I’ve been opened up to do my surgery, it would not metastasize. I did do one round of chemotherapy, but declined further treatment as I did not “come up” as well with the first rounds given. I was given 90 mg of doxorubicin and via an intra-arterial catheter, 120 mg of Cisplatin. I proceeded with the limb-salvage/saving surgery to my lower leg which included a reconstruction and adding of an endo prosthetic limb with a total knee replacement and cutting of one of my gastrocnemius (or calf muscle) to be repositioned from the back of my leg to the front to cover the endo prosthesis. Despite being told I would die in 3 years post operation for not having done the rounds of chemotherapy recommended. It has now been 7 years.

Writing this blog actually took me a month due to some of the things I had to relive/revisit which made me extremely emotional…..even after all this time. The best advice I have for someone having been given the notice of having cancer would be DON’T STOP BEING YOU. Don’t allow nothing and no one to tell you how you should feel, what you should be feeling, what you should be doing (outside of medical advice) ESPECIALLY after having gone through it. Most importantly: if you are a believer-Don’t waver in your faith, God does NOT make mistakes.

Find a support group. It’s especially harder in the African-American community when there is a lack of understanding, compassion, and education amongst us so be sure to do as much research as possible about your diagnosis. Don’t be afraid to reach out and ask questions. Know that even if it has happen years ago, it’s still okay to cry. There is no time limit on when you should get over a life changing and traumatic event. Just be sure you don’t become a victim of the event. Change your perspective to be a positive influence for those who aren’t as strong physically, mentality, emotionally.

As for my life after cancer, I am now a certified personal trainer whose health has become so much better than the 7 years past. I have celebrated my 1st year of being opiate/pain pill free this past January after making the decision to going cold turkey January 2016. I have made it a mission of mine to find and connect with those who are having a hard time getting past the hump with life after cancer. I didn’t have a great support system going through and after cancer and I am ensuring that I can assist those that may need reassuring that it does get better.

#treading #cancersurvivor #cancersupport #certifiedpersonaltrainer #osteosarcoma #bone #cancer #survivorship #health & fitness #healthandwellness

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