lilacmoonpixie

[lilacmoonpixie]

acts of service bitches when someone doesn't Need Something from them but wants them around anyways and they have to think about the fact that they could possibly be wanted for who they Are rather than what they can Do

[lilacmoonpixie]

in addition to the fact that people just have different natural rhythms, a big reason why we can’t seem to go to bed as early as we “should” is that nighttime is, for many of us, our safest and most fulfilling time of day. we don’t have to work, we won’t be contacted by bosses or insurance companies or collection agencies or other suffocating life business… we’re likely only to be contacted by our friends, or by no one at all. night time is release; it’s ours. we can rest or recreate. we can do things we actually want to do. who would choose to cut that short?? just to usher in the next morning when our lives are not our own again? nighttime is precious and nothing could be more normal than the desire to embrace this

[lilacmoonpixie]

*

mortifying ordeal, etc. 🕊

(claire schwartz / coco mellors)

[lilacmoonpixie]

i don’t even want love that bad (vibrating with desire)

[lilacmoonpixie]

I am the world's #1 contributor to walking around aimlessly

[lilacmoonpixie]

girl who is sitting in a chair quietly with a neutral expression actually screaming very loudly in her head

[lilacmoonpixie]

i’ve been sad so i drew pynch with pets

[lilacmoonpixie]

"why did your cat bite me" you pet her incorrectly. deserved

[lilacmoonpixie]

actually, i love you, so you cannot be ugly to me. sometimes i think i have no idea what you actually look like. i know we've been friends for like a while but if someone asked oh who's that i'd talk about how funny you are, how charming. about how i have watched you grow as a person, about how you often choose kindness where i would honestly choose a feral violence. i know you keep a tally of your mistakes and they run around your brain - but in mine? i think they never even make it past the front gate. when i think of you my heart swells up with all the weird shit we've done together and how you've talked me through heartbreak and how i've held your hair back and how we both are like, in therapy, and totally above gossiping, but also like, are going to spill the work tea.

i know! i know you feel ugly. i know you hate that you show symptoms, that you're not normal. you said once - i'm afraid to show others the real me. but i see the other things - about these little quirks that are so, so endearing to me. how you are gentle to strangers. how you stand by your friends. how comfortable you make everybody. how you say hey, did you get home safe? even when it's like 6 feet i'm walking.

i love you. yesterday you spent an hour liveblogging the episode of owl house that you're on and i was like - this person is so fucking amazing. last night you said sorry for infodumping. as if you have anything to apologize for. as if part of the reason we're friends is because i love it when you do this, i love listening. i love you, idiot. i love you so fucking much. i want to stick you in a cage so you stop getting random injuries. i want to throw you into a garbage disposal every time you send me that one specific meme. i love you, i love you, i love you. you mean absolutely everything to me.

[lilacmoonpixie]

*forgives myself for the moments I've acted outside my values due to fear and uncertainty*

[lilacmoonpixie]

looking up at the sky, seranading the moon with 'to you i can admit that im just too soft for all of it!!!'

#midnights #taylor swift #sweet nothing #moon my beloved #moon

[lilacmoonpixie]

Untitled painting by Daniel F. Gerhartz/ excerpts from 'Text me when you get home' by Kayleen Schaefer/ 'Hinds feet' by Daniel F. Gerhartz

[lilacmoonpixie]

Mentally, I’m lying in bed on a cold day with a girl in my arms. Neither of us want to leave the warmth, and so we cuddle closer instead.

[lilacmoonpixie]

sometimes do you ever just want to

[lilacmoonpixie]

"bring out your inner bitch" ma'am my inner bitch is a golden retriever🥺😔

[lilacmoonpixie]

maybe i'm just touch-starved but platonic physical affection my beloved: a gentle hand tucking your hair back for you, curling up and burying your face into their side, getting engulfed in a tight bear hug, tangling limbs to squeeze into the same chair, dusting crumbs away and tucking shirt tags back in without a thought, quietly lacing hands and swinging them back and forth, the solid weight of a tired head on your shoulder, casually moving through each other's space, rolling their sleeves up before they get dirty, absent-mindedly doodling flowers on their arm, walking on the outside of the sidewalk just in case, falling asleep with your head in their lap

[lilacmoonpixie]

idk if it’s the mental illness but sharing literally any information feels like oversharing. i’ll be like “i skipped breakfast this morning” and immediately im like “i might as well have told them where i buried the money”