lilydotroxanne

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an incomplete collection of tweets i consider to be short poems

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Chelsea Dingman, from "Psychogeography"

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from rayne fisher-quann’s latest substack post

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This latest vip episode is like if Norman takamori took the money instead of the ship

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Zac repeatedly breaking Vic and himself in the most recent VIP is just the best thank you no notes.

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“you were a little boy josh- that’s what you were supposed to do”

mr sorkin i won’t stop until i draw blood

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before there was bluey, there was pluie ✊

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behold, modern west wing au: potus edition

i'm done putting these under the cut you all just have to deal with it LOL

Jed Bartlet is, above all, a boomer and relishes in doing everything in his constitutional power to make CJ's job harder. He loves calling Abbey a Karen once Charlie explains what it means to him.

He refuses to text and instead walks around SCREAMING into his speech-to-text all sorts of highly confidential or sensitive material such as military plans, drafts of speeches, and staff gossip. danny wins a Pulitzer for his reporting on the later.

I just feel like he'd really enjoy Game of Thrones, but like to a weird degree. mandatory staff viewing parties, etc.

2022 Jed has beef with Oprah, I know this for certain

Unsurprisingly, Jed is the biggest troll known to mankind. One of his favorite pastimes is looking up Onion headlines and trying to make them into reality down to the "POTUS shakes hands with gator in last ditch attempt to win Florida".

Toby accidentally spoils the wordle of the day for Jed, so he outright bans Toby's favorite Keurig cup (cinnabon coffee) from the west wing as retribution

I feel like Jed would really love John & Hank Green's Crash Course education youtube series and would bring them on board in an official admin capacity with funding, etc.

a 2022 POTUS means he would've been teaching in the time of RateMyProfessor. Republicans dug up his old reviews to try to get dirt on him but were shocked that he had the highest "hot looks" rating out of the entire university

a 2022 POTUS also means he was in his twenties during the late 70s, early 80s so we've got some glorious Big Hair Jed photos that Charlie and Josh used to build a shrine in the bullpen men's restroom

As usual, Josh creates a nationwide scandal and there's widespread calls for his removal from the administration. Jed manages to break into the POTUS twitter account (Sam regularly changes the passwords to prevent precisely this from happening) and tweets out: "No." it trends for four days straight

Sam and CJ have been trying to promote the POTUS tiktok account to pick up more youth votes. Jed refuses to cooperate unless he can pick the filter so he ends up giving his administration's version of fireside chats like this:

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CJ: *is mildly upset*

Toby, somewhere in the West Wing: *lifts his head* I sense a disturbance in the Force

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modern west wing social media hcs

i feel like charlie would have the most normal social media acct and following, like maybe an instagram where he posts pictures of himself (mostly for family), and like a twitter where he occasionally retweets his friends or bartlet. he likes making fun of other people (especially senior staff) for being too stuck to their devices, and a large online presence would take away that ability

CJ’s twitter is less incendiary than she’d like, since she’s the face of the bartlet administration, and so a lot of it is discussing policy or clarifying briefings. she does retweet a lot of good edu sites or interesting articles she finds. she herself trends a lot, she’s pretty famous online as a political icon ala AOC or bernie sanders, and she gets a lot of edits made online from press conferences (which she enjoys bragging abt to the other staff, while making fun of them for being out-of-touch). CJ also has a private instagram that hogan had her make, but she only posts extremely blurry pictures of coffee and her goldfish with captions like “hogan said to post to remind people that im alive”. toby always replies with “sending the pictures to MOMA. breathtaking” and danny replies with “breaking news. press secretary reveals she is still alive. more at 7”.

leo does not have social media because he still has a flip phone and a brick laptop. he says he prefers hearing bad news out loud or reading it on physical paper, but really, he just can’t figure out how to work it. im talking types “google” into google, then types “hello find me a map of the united states of america” in the search bar. margaret tried to help but seeing him type google into google physically pained her

josh is banned from twitter (after he pissed off three midwestern states, basket weavers, and most hollywood producers in the first week in office). cj regularly checks to make sure he hasn’t made a new account. he has a public instagram, but cj looks over captions before he posts (he once tried to ask the president for permission to get a new account but the president sided with cj). most of his posts are about encouraging people to vote or be more politically active. he is also not allowed to reply to comments on the instagram, so he reads them out loud in a mocking voice to donna. unbeknownst to him, there is a white house deputy chief of staff twitter page run by donna (with cj’s permission) that discusses white house initiatives and shares fun anecdotes abt day to day work. anytime someone tells josh they love his twitter account he assumes they mean instagram, and nobody tells him until bartlet is two years out of office

donna, like charlie, has an instagram mostly for her family back home, but also has a twitter where she talks about tv shows she likes and her hobbies, that has a decent following. she might have a tumblr but again it would be abt tv shows and hobbies she has

toby is on goodreads and instagram (but only to leave sarcastic comments on his friends’ posts). he hates twitter’s word count limit and how it’s owned by elon musk, and rants abt it often. he leaves lengthy reviews on any political commentary article in the comments section. this has been brought up in the briefing room, to the point where cj has a recording of herself saying “toby ziegler’s online rants are not indicative of president bartlet’s views. if you have any questions please direct them to ziegler himself”

president bartlet has facebook </3. there’s a white house twitter page run by an intern, but he’s not involved with that. he posts fun facts about national parks or ancient latin novels, but each fact starts with something like “joshua lyman, 🧍‍♂️deputy chief of staff, 🇺🇸doesn’t understand the true beauty of yellowstone national park 🙄🏞🏜🤦‍♂️”. most people think it’s a parody account and cj doesn’t want to correct them

abbey does not have facebook, despite her husbands insistence that it’s better than twitter. on the rare occasions she uses her account it’s mostly to discuss important medical breakthroughs and her daughter’s work

sam has a really popular instagram, where he posts selfies and pretty pictures of the white house and captions like “having a great day at work today!” or “white house at sunset.. gorgeous”. he posts on his story a lot, and comes off as very relatable to the public. he’s cj’s dream social media user

will bailey runs campaign social medias pretty well but his own twitter account is mostly for promoting the campaigns. occasionally he retweets stuff his friends post, or tweets out funny jokes he hears.

margaret is tumblr famous, but never posts abt her job. her posts regularly wind up on other sites. she hasn’t told anybody and doesn’t plan to

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theyre so funny

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it’s them

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I think it's what she deserves ✨

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