lonelier-version-of-you

[lonelier-version-of-you]

I'm not even being picky, I'd be as happy to write meta-y thoughts as to write fic, but I don't even feel like that.

All I really want to do right now is write but I have terrible writer's block... sigh.

[lonelier-version-of-you]

All I really want to do right now is write but I have terrible writer's block... sigh.

#personal tag

[lonelier-version-of-you]

If only I didn't have a headache I'd have a lot more coherent character thoughts to talk about. But I do have a headache.

#personal tag

[lonelier-version-of-you]

Something that occurred to me recently is that there are a few parallels one could draw - probably not tons, but there are definitely parallels there - in how Gaynor has treated Teddy to how Henrik treated Sahira. Particularly how Henrik and Gaynor both went out of their way to try to isolate their victims.

I don't mean I'm saying this in a "Henrik was like a parental figure to Sahira" way. I'm saying it in a "Gaynor treats Teddy more like he's her husband than as her son" way. Thinking about that is what led me to compare that dynamic to the Henrik and Sahira one.

And, like Casualty with Gaynor, Holby later seemed to forget Henrik had been portrayed as an abuser.

#tw;abuse

[lonelier-version-of-you]

I've been contemplating the Sahira and Henrik dynamic a lot today.

Sahira deserved so much better. Especially since Greg wasn't exactly great to her either.

[lonelier-version-of-you]

I'm exhausted again and anxious for no reason again and I hate it. I'd like to go back to sleep but I know it wouldn't really do anything for me right now. It's a nice thought though.

#personal tag

[lonelier-version-of-you]

I should probably be more talkative, or at least more productive, but I just haven't felt like it. I've not been at my best emotionally.

#personal tag

[lonelier-version-of-you]

It's almost surreal to think about how much more development a character - like Tara, though there are other examples too - could get over a year or so's worth of appearances in older Holby compared to later on.

I am, of course, thinking a lot about Tara Lo today.

What a great character she was. It's a shame she wasn't around for long. I'd have loved to have seen how she might have interacted with some later characters.

[lonelier-version-of-you]

I am, of course, thinking a lot about Tara Lo today.

What a great character she was. It's a shame she wasn't around for long. I'd have loved to have seen how she might have interacted with some later characters.

[lonelier-version-of-you]

I'd say I'll cheer myself up with Johnrik thoughts, but they aren't exactly the couple to think about if one wants to be cheerful!

I knew my couple of nights of decent sleep wouldn't last but I am nonetheless very frustrated about it lol.

[lonelier-version-of-you]

I knew my couple of nights of decent sleep wouldn't last but I am nonetheless very frustrated about it lol.

#personal tag

[lonelier-version-of-you]

I keep going from "basically fine" to "really angry" to "very depressed" etc. and it's exhausting.

I hate all the mood swings I've been having recently, it's so annoying to put up with.

#personal tag

[lonelier-version-of-you]

I hate all the mood swings I've been having recently, it's so annoying to put up with.

#personal tag

[lonelier-version-of-you]

For one reason or another, I've got a feeling lately that Casualty will have Tariq turn out to be bi.

That could be cool. I quite like him so far. I assume we'll get more queer rep from Casualty soon, even if not with Tariq particularly - it has been really just Jan (and Teddy and Stevie, the 'they're not canonically bi but they're canonically bi to me' duo) for a while now, so there must be more representation coming up.

#BBC Casualty #Tariq Hussein

[lonelier-version-of-you]

It seems I'm having a "I slept a reasonable amount but am still tired" kind of day. Very irritating.

#personal tag

[lonelier-version-of-you]

I ought to be writing tbh, I just can't be bothered lol.

#personal tag

[lonelier-version-of-you]

Every now and then I think about Henrik/Maja and get sad.

It just makes me emotional how they loved each other so much and it just wasn't enough to save their relationship.

#Holby City #Henrik Hanssen #Maja Johanssen