lonley-lolita

[lonley-lolita]

I am waiting for some stand-in version of myself to walk threw my bedroom doors and pull me out of the lonely trap I have crafted for myself.

But I’m not sure where she is.

Have you seen a woman lately that felt like a cold glass of sweet tea after a long day at the pool?

If you have, then you’re lucky, but me, I haven’t seen her in months.

While she's away, I will admit that I feel safe in these white linen sheets.

So safe I think I might just lay here forever.

Please don’t bother telling that girl I’m looking for her.

[lonley-lolita]

We hold hands while we fall asleep….. I think this is our silent declaration of our love for one another

#love me #spilled feelings #confessional poetry #dark academia #female poets #one sided love #romantic academia #situationship

[lonley-lolita]

[lonley-lolita]

"I wonder whose arms would I run and fall into if I were drunk in a room with everyone I have ever loved."

- this becomes almost deeper when you think of non-romantic loves too

[lonley-lolita]

my tumblr is what the inside of my head looks like

[lonley-lolita]

who up wanting something they can never have

[lonley-lolita]

The Analysis of Yearning (Garod), Paruyr Sevak (from “Anthology of Armenian poetry")

[lonley-lolita]

The Color of Pomegranates (Նռան գույնը), dir. Sergei Parajanov (1969)

[lonley-lolita]

I need solitude. I need space. I need air. I need the empty fields round me; and my legs pounding along roads; and sleep; and animal existence.

Virginia Woolf, from The Diary of Virginia Woolf

[lonley-lolita]

Ottessa Moshfegh, Eileen

[lonley-lolita]

Snigdha Koirala, from "longing so flawed"

[lonley-lolita]

I really like the word “smitten”. because at first glance you just think of sappy lovey-dovey stuff but also you have to remember this is a word that’s born of the word “smite.” a devastating word. a word that, summarized, means stricken. smitten means stricken as well — struck with devastating affection.

[lonley-lolita]

[lonley-lolita]

Doctor prescribed me 100mg of true love’s kiss

[lonley-lolita]

“I no longer have the energy for meaningless friendships, forced interactions or unnecessary conversations.”

— Joquesse Eugenia

[lonley-lolita]

I am a deeply happy person now but I don’t think being a happy person looks or feels how we imagine it to. I am a deeply happy person because despite many painful and life altering experiences I have sat with my pain and held it close to me even when I wanted to get far away from it. I am deeply happy because I am unafraid of myself. My happiness is a gentle one, it doesn’t have to rise up in ego or shrink down in shame, it’s presence is always near, and if not happiness then I can always conjure up a bit of awe for this mystical world around us.

[lonley-lolita]

more studying, more walks, more reading, more skill-based hobbies, more experimenting w pretty fits and hairstyles, more gym, more exploring new things in general, more whole foods/healthy recipes, more financial literacy, more time management, more time off the phone, more being out the loop. nothing else matters