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pennywise a real one for killing eddie before he could experience covid. he would have LOST IT

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listening to it audiobook and GOD patty and stan,,,obsessed with them they love each other so much

#EXACTLY #they love each other #so much #TT #i miss them

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a really super long and self indulgent list of my own modern day adult losers club headcanons.

Beverly

-5’4, always wearing jewelry but sometimes she’ll leave the same stuff on for the whole week, her nail polish chips too often but Richie says it ‘looks kinda rad’

-was the Jigsaw puppet for Halloween last year since they all went as horror movie characters. she looked great, she got a tricycle.

-loves to watch TLC, ghost adventures, shitty TV like that, HATES glee

-will only be in the passengers seat if she can pick the music unless they’re all in the car

-changes into comfy clothes AS SOON as she gets home

-bought a vape once with Stan and Richie and then threw it out the window. She missed it and went back to get it but it was gone so she decided it was probably for the best.

-whenever she gets a haircut she goes in and fixes it herself to how she likes it

-picks a different color every time she’s asked her favorite color

-gets drunk with exclusively Eddie and Stan like, a lot.

Mike

-6’2, shops at Old Navy and gets a headache every time because he smells all the colognes before looking at clothes

-was Micheal Myers last year for Halloween because his name is Mike. Left his mask at Stan’s house, it scared the shit out of Stan when he found it.

-still plays Pokémon go

-needs to stop buying random cool things on eBay

-always taking videos

-likes to be the one to go pick up food whenever they order something, goes on a side quest with whoever comes with him

-still has a landline phone at his house

-Beverly calls him when her, Stan, and Eddie need a ride because they’ve gotten too drunk. He’s just the best option. She knows he’s probably hanging out with Ben anyways.

-always brings one of those heating canteen things with warm coffee to the function

-talks to himself when he’s drunk

Eddie

-5’8 but he says he’s 5’9, takes his work clothes very seriously

-was Patrick Bateman last Halloween because Beverly convinced him he would look good

-oldest of the group

-did that trend where you put your arms through the arm holes in someone else’s shirt with Richie and proceeded to slap him in the face. not that hard.

-calls Stan ‘Stanley’ more often than just Stan, but he says it so fast it kind of just sounds like ‘Staley’

-at Christmas time he constantly tells everyone that George Michael died on Christmas and “why are we still playing ‘Last Christmas’??” but he likes the song.

-will sing karaoke when he’s drunk

-power bottom

-sometimes he’ll get really into a bit with Richie and it gets to a point where nobody else knows what they’re talking about

-goes on runs with Ben but he needs earbuds in while he’s running, also sings Backstreet Boys with Ben secretly

-sends multiple gifs to the group chat

Ben

-5’11, has had the same pairs of jeans for way too long and Beverly tries to get him new ones but they’re just not as comfortable

-was Jason from Friday the 13th for Halloween last year because he pretty much just needed to use his own old clothes and a mask

-asks Stan what laundry detergent he uses because he smells good

-really likes Chic Fil A but he won’t go because he heard they’re homophobic. One time Richie asked if he wanted to go and he was like YES I WILL GO ITS OKAY IF I GO WITH YOU and Richie had no idea what he meant.

-talks to Eddie on their runs even though Eddie has earbuds in, but it’s okay because Eddie will sing to the Backstreet Boys with him later

-likes glee

-still uses wii fit until Beverly tells him to stop because he gets too into it

-drinks Mai Tais, first to say ‘I love you guys’ when they’re drunk

-he and Richie prank call Bill from Mikes landline phone all the time

-insisted that they all go see the Cocaine Bear movie in theatres

Stan

-5’11, hangs his sweaters to dry so they don’t shrink

-just put a purge mask on for Halloween last year

-watches Sunday Morning

-orchestrated a zoom movie night function for everyone

-secretly has a camera on his front door, sometimes he catches everybody doing dumb shit out there

-sometimes he’ll dryly say something to Richie that is so blatantly untrue that it’s fucking hilarious. Like “oh man it’s raining. I came here on my Segway so I have to get going, see you later”

-constantly uses online ordering for food because he wants to be specific and he knows it’s a hassle for the employees, he won’t ask if he has to do it to their face

-responds with 👍 way too much

-tries to convince Ben to ask Richie if it’s okay to go to Chic Fil A because he thinks it would be funny

-plays words with friends

-drunkenly talks to Mike when Mike is drunkenly talking to himself. like “oh wow that’s really cool Mikey” until Mike notices.

Richie

-6’4 (fuck you I like huge Richie), wears the shirts from icarly that say the most random shit like “church pants” or “my cheese my rules”

-was Beetlejuice for Halloween last year, got green hand prints everywhere because he put green hairspray shit on. Stan made him clean them. He purposely hid Mikes mask to scare Stan.

-asks for the videos that Mike takes so he can edit everyone to say things they didn’t say. Eddie falls for it sometimes.

-wears sunglasses over his glasses when he’s drunk, takes over when Eddie has stopped singing karaoke and pretends he’s hosting an award show with only the losers present

-has a note in his phone that says: “baby names: Crunch, Sam Brarro, Cornwallace, Mozier, Red Rover, Thumb, Djasper Probincrux III, Shant, Brock Lee…”

-can solve a rubix cube really fast

-went back and got the vape before Beverly could then one day it falls out of his pocket while they watch TLC together

-sends Mike cool shit to buy off eBay

-constantly makes jokes that Eddie is into younger guys (because Eddie is the oldest)

Bill

-5’10, needs to stop wearing flannels

-wore a shark outfit for Halloween and put some of the fake blood that Eddie used for his costume on it. He was the shark from Jaws.

-plays Pokémon go with Mike, words with friends with Stan, and Wii Fit with Ben

-says “I actually kinda like that one” when Richie reads his baby name list

-listens to The Final Countdown when he needs a pep talk

-has a group chat for himself, Richie, Ben and Mike to hangout when Bev, Stan and Eddie go out.

-says that the ending of every movie sucks because he’s secretly projecting, one time he was confronted outside of a movie theatre by some film bros

-asks Beverly to send him the songs that she plays in the car

-considers himself the group leader, secretly considers Richie to be the number two

-even though Ben told him about the prank calls, and they’re devising a plan to scare the shit out of Richie

-pulls up random shit that he thinks is funny on his phone when he’s drunk

-is the one to carry a communal backpack whenever everyone goes to an amusement park or some big place

#FUCK YEAH #you get me #*banging my knife and fork on the table* #more more more #love this shit

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sobbing and crying (thinking about stanley uris)

i need him to come back from the war (have more fanfiction and art about him)

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Not to ruin your night, but imagine how destroyed Mike is in the aftermath of it all. Losing Stan and Eddie was devastating for the rest of them, after just remembering each other again, but Mike had remembered them the whole time. For 27 years, when he wasn’t doing his research, Mike passed the time imagining the day this would all be over and he’d have his friends back. It was the only way he could bear the burden of being the watchman. He pictured the seven of them together on the other side of It, free from the cloud of Derry, and now two of his friends are dead. Mike never even got to meet Stan as an adult.

He knows what he looked like, though, the way he knew all of their faces, because he’d kept track of them. For 27 years. It was harder for some than others, but the evolution of social media made it basically a hobby instead of a job. He knew when Stan and Eddie graduated college, when they got married, when their parents died, when they got new jobs, and with every piece of their lives he could uncover on the internet or in the newspaper, he imagined getting to see them again, talk to them again, share their lives again.

And then they died, and Mike is left trying to figure out what the hell the point of it all was. He sacrificed his life for his friends only to lose them anyway, and how is he supposed to cope with that?

#FONT FUCMING DO TVUS TO MS

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Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King Rating: Not Rated Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: The Losers Club & The Losers Club (IT), Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, implied, honestly my version of the losers club is v affectionate, anyone could be dating anyone Characters: Fem Stanley Uris, Fem Bill Denbrough, Fem Mike Hanlon, Fem Eddie Kaspbrak - Character, fem Ben Hanlon, Fem Richie Tozier, Beverly Marsh Additional Tags: Female Losers Club (IT), references to twilight, reference(s) to mean girls, this is for me to find their voices, its short, a fun casual little convo, its like most all dialogue, so much dialogue Summary:

“Count me out. I don’t like Twilight.” Stan was sitting criss-cross-applesauce, placing her completed assignment into the section in her baby-blue accordion folder labeled “Math”.

“Th-that’s not what you said when you watched it the first time,” Bill teased, smiling against Stan’s death-glare, especially as there were three, eager-eyed girls in the room who did not know this story. “You were convinced that you were supposed to be a v-vampire for the next year.”

#HOW HAVE I NOT SEEN TBIS BEFORE???? #AMAZONG #brillaimt #cant spell omg #IT WAS SO CUTE #youve litelly captured stan from my mind palace perfectly

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Stan: Hi, could I ask how exactly does one accidentally set a lemon on fire?

Mike: Microwave for 40 minutes :(

Bev: Why were you microwaving a lemon?

Mike: I read boiling lemons helps cover up bad smells. I wanted to cover up the scent of burnt oranges, but I don’t own any pots

Eddie: Did you burn an orange too? How??

Mike: Microwave for 40 minutes :(

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Bev: What’s your favorite hobby?

Stan: Puzzles

Bev: Wha-like making puzzles? Collecting puzzles?

Eddie: Playing with puzzles?

Stan: Just puzzles

Bev: …I’m putting snowboarding

#ITS ALWAYS SUNNY REFERENCE !!!

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Poly Losers Publicity

This is an idea, a back bone of a fic that I'm never going to write so I'm putting it here. If you want to write it, go ahead. I just need to get these brain worms out of my head. This is from my Poly Losers Au.

So like Richie, Bev, and Bill are all relatively famous? Richie is a famous comedian (who I headcannon him being on SNL at one point in his career) and then you have Bev who is a famous fashion designer? Like her work rivals Gucci and other major fashion brands. Then you have Bill who is like the horror novelist, who always has his books being adapted into movies.

So anyways the public is nosy and wants to know who's banging who. Richie, Bill, and Bev, along with the other Losers have decided to keep their relationship a secret. Yeah being gay/bi is okay but they don't want to have to explain why they're in a relationship of seven people. Bev, Richie, and Bill handle this in many different ways. Bev just deflects any relationship questions in interviews and Richie jokes that he's a whore and no one will date him. (Stan and Eddie give him so much shit over that bit) and Bill,,,poor bb flounders.

Bill likes to dedicate his books to his lovers. Each book he writes has a dedication that says something like: "To my lover who watches the birds", or "To my lover that is sun on earth", and naturally people ask who this lover is in interviews. And Bill just doesn't know how to lie so the general public just thinks that Bill's lover is a multifaceted person who loves to grow plants, bird watches, work on cars, and also writes poetry.

This all works for a while until Bill is caught in public holding hands with Ben. Magazines blow up like :"Is this the lover of many talents?? World Renowned architect Ben Hanscom??" so now they just let the public think Bill is dating just Ben. Also Bill and Richie got an argument over it that went like:

Richie: "This is so not fair, why do you get Ben?"

Bill: "It's not like I was trying to get caught!"

Richie: "Well if you get Ben then I get Mike!"

Bill: "Fine."

Richie: "Fine!"

Bill: "Fine!"

On Richie's next stand up he tells everyone he's dating this cute librarian named Mike and like with Bill, the press eats that up.

But fans are crazy right? Like they had a working theory that Richie was actually dating this high end accountant (Stanley) bc Richie had been spotted with him a couple times at fancy parties. (Stanley is a slut for fancy parties and Richie only goes to the ones he's invited to bc he knows Stan will enjoy it) But some other fans had a theory that Richie was dating high end fashion designer Beverly Marsh. Because Richie only ever wears her clothes on stage or in interviews. Plus they've been spotted being flirty before at award shows. So fans are a little confused when Richie announces he's dating a humble librarian.

But remember fans are crazy so it doesn't take long for them to figure out that Bill Denbrough also only ever wears suits out of the Beverly Marsh brand. Which is strange bc Bill and Richie have very much a bickering banter in the spotlight. So they're all left wondering, what does this all mean?

Because yes Bev avoids relationship questions but she always has the same guy with her as her 'date' at events. A man not much taller than her and he's been seen reassuring her at her runway shows. Calming down her anxiety. (Eddie is 100% Bev's unofficial manager and I like to think that Bev's fashion is her and Eddie's thing. He's the one who goes to all her shows.)

So at this point fans are going crazy. They have Bill who is dating the famous architect but has written too many dedications for it just be about Ben. Also some fans 'ship' Bill and Richie bc of how they play fight through the press.

Then there's Richie who is dating the "Librarian" Mike Hanlon, but also Richie has been spotted with at like Galas with one of the best accountants in the business, Stanley Uris and he constantly flirts with Bev in the public eye.

But Richie and Bill both exclusively wear Beverly Marsh. And Bev who avoids relationship questions but is seen with the same man at shows, who the fans had pieced together is Eddie Kaspbrack. Someone who owns a predominant limousine company in New York.

And this all falls apart after one particular award show, Bill's book turned Movie won an oscar, and the Losers were out celebrating at what they thought was a private party....only to wake up the next morning and see all hell break loose. There are photos of Richie making out with Bill and Ben. There's a couple photos of Bev scandalously dancing with Richie's librarian boyfriend, Mike. Then to top it off Eddie and Stan are spotted sneaking away from said party. Two people with romantic links to Bev and Richie.

The internet blows up.

Richie tweets out the next day: "So I see you've guys have met my lovers. Yes, plural. Told you I was a whore."

I honestly feel like this has been down before, and if it has please let me know. I just can't get this particular version out of my head.

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Bev: Can you name all 59 women-

Richie: Fuck. I had no idea there were that many

Richie: …

Richie: Amelia Earhart…

Richie: …Doja Cat

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me and my cousins when we were young, showing our family our dance that we choreographed in my room ten minutes earlier.

#this video sends me evwry time bc wtf were they up to

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i??????? sksjsbzvsvshdhsbdb

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Patty *to Stan*: I kinda feel like an orange

Stan: …I feel like a tomato

Patty *laughing*: No- like I feel like eating an orange

Stan: Oh we got one in the kitchen-

Patty: Oh- but I don’t feel like peeling it

Stan: I’ll peel it for you- I’ll cut it for you- I’ll sauté it

Patty: *laughing*

Stan: Whatever you want

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Bev: Mike, I need a boost!

Mike: You're a good person and people say nice things about you

Bev: …vertically

Mike: Right, sorry

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Let me break it down for y’all;

Killing babies and children = No more future generations

Killing women and pregnant women = No more future generations

Killing men= No more future generations

Killing the elderly = Erasing history and culture for future generations

Killing journalists = No news coverage of what’s really happening so the opposing side can push propaganda.

Open your eyes the Palestinians that do survive this if a ceasefire doesn’t come will lose their culture and identity because Israel will force them to assimilate to whatever sick and twisted ideology they want. This is a genocide! The Palestinian genocide is directly mirroring the Native American genocide. Keep talking about Palestine, it’s a privilege you get to scroll away from dead children and adults.

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im seriously just thinking about how stanley uris is the character ever

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me holding a gun to a mushroom: tell me the name of god you fungal piece of shit

mushroom: can you feel your heart burning? can you feel the struggle within? the fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make. you cannot kill me in a way that matters

me cocking the gun, tears streaming down my face: I’M NOT FUCKING SCARED OF YOU