lostfirstrayofsun

[lostfirstrayofsun]

i am so sadddd, its getting so frustrating. i dont know what is happening and which way i am going. i know that good things will happen but it's taking so soso much time and i cant stop crying. please help me someone. its not that i am not grateful for the good things, i am, i am so sos so much. for all the experiences, fun moments EVERYTHING. thank you so so much god. i am really thankful but what is happening now, what is all this being prepared for? i feel like i am lagging behind, i also what learn, grow, be better. please at least give me the right place and time.

#thoughts #life is strange

[lostfirstrayofsun]

I have never cried as much as I did recently. And I cry a lot usually. This time it was mostly because of a guy. And now because of all the crying I hurt my eyes and I don’t know when it would get better. Wtf I am so angry at myself. Why did I do this? Now I can’t focus on anything else. I am 24/7 worried about my eye. I don’t want to get operated. Please god stop it from happening. I have already learnt my lesson. Ughhh and also boys. All they do is make you cry. Men don’t. I am want a man now. A mature, understanding, caring, loving, responsible man.

#thoughts #crying #eyes #eyestrain #life sukcs #boys #relationship #breakup

[lostfirstrayofsun]

2023 is coming to an end and it was one hell of a year. I got a job, I lost it. Gout into a relationship, broke up. Starting preparing for an exam, didn’t do well.

But I am not ending this year with any regrets. I loved each part. I know all that happened was for the best. But it would be a lie to say that I am not anxious about what’s ahead. I have one more exam. What will happen? If I don’t do well, I’ll have to again find a job. How will I do that? Kinda stressing me out. But I’ll be okay. Only thing I wish for is life experiences. Independence. Lessons that make me stronger and blessings. Many blessings. Lots and lots. SHOW ME HOW IT GETS BETTER DEAR UNIVERSE!😇

#thoughts #manifesation #2023 #new year #jobs #relationship #breakup #exams #motivation #law of attraction #law of assumption

[lostfirstrayofsun]

It's crazy how some of your wildest manifestations come true only for you to realise that you don't want them. They feel more burden than blessing. Only cuz deep down you feel like you don't deserve them..

#thoughts #random #manifesation #life is strange

[lostfirstrayofsun]

Should I go to italy? Brain says no🙅‍♀ but the heart says what if a miracle happens? And suddenly life makes sense...

#thoughts #italy #confused #miracle

[lostfirstrayofsun]

I want someone to bite my bottom lip real hard.

#thoughts #hornyaf

[lostfirstrayofsun]

Freaking hell when does this end. I'm fine one moment and then the other I'm so fuckinh frustrated of fuckijgib everything like what's the point? Am I wrong? Why does it seem difficult? It's messing with me so much. Is it even worth it? Am I just overreacting? Fukong hell with everything just wtfffffffffffffffff

[lostfirstrayofsun]

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[lostfirstrayofsun]

It's so frustrating to talk to people who have the opposite opinions as you and are not open to understand your way of thinking. And specially when they are your friends. I have a friend like that. We have had many ups and downs and a lot of history. And today talking to him I figured out where we were going wrong. He doesn't think the way I do. Our mindsets are completely opposite and on top of that he isn't open to understand my side of the story and it hasn't happened once. It keeps happening. And I keep getting annoyed by it. And it makes me wanna never share stuff with him but then he gets upset when I don't tell him things then I have to apologize and the same cycle keeps repeating. It's so frustrating at this point. But today, today I have concluded that it has to stop. I'm not saying he's wrong but I wish he would at least give it some thought, try to understand things from pov for once because those are my problems. Smashing his opinion, which is completely different, and then us arguing the whole time makes me loose all of my brain cells. This lesson is learnt. I rather keep my rants to myself and solve my problems on my own.

#thoughts #friends #friendship #life is strange

[lostfirstrayofsun]

why am i so burned out?

— 11/06/22

life feels like a mess. i finally know what i want or at least what i want for the time being. but still why am i not able to do it? why do i feel burned out even after having those surges of motivation? i dont know how to overcome this. i feel so lost and i know there is no one who can help me but me. im trying. saying my affirmations daily, keeping a positive mindset and working on my self concept. maybe thats the thing. maybe i spent to much brain power in thinking about those things that when the time to actually work comes, im burned out. regardless i wont give up. tomorrow will be a new day, a new chance and i will keep working, keep pushing myself until i am successful. there is so much more i want to say but thats it for now.

#thoughts #motivateyourself #3 am mood #life sukcs #affirmations #self confidence #self concept #manifesation #success #daily blog