louisbxttxrfly

[louisbxttxrfly]

Poetry 🪞✨🥀

Tw // Ed implications

They Don’t Know That I’m Actually Ugly

The figures on the scale engrave their value into my head

And “their’s” becomes mine

As my feet peel off the cool surface

And my hand clutches around my stomach,

Empty.

Mind full.

No food tomorrow.

And when I wipe off my mask

And see myself at face value,

Without makeup;

Nothing to hide behind.

A distorted truth greets me

From the other end of the mirror

And I realise

they don’t know that I’m simply a piece of ugly

Wearing a disguise.

When my hair dries

And the iron dies

And I can’t straighten it today;

Tame it.

For it is a beast that deserves domestication.

I can’t be seen like this

Because they don’t know this me.

They love the other me;

The pretty one;

The mask.

And I can’t say that this version deserves the love she gets.

When my thoughts spew out of my mouth

Like arrows.

Before I can think over them once more.

And I laugh to cover up the pauses

That I spend using to analyse

Every statement I have made until this very moment

Because how could an ugly thing be tolerated

If not by having words so perfect

As the beauty of her companions?

After all, my words are all I have left

Without the mask of beauty to glamorise my mistakes.

I don’t have the privilege of pretty.

So I must say the right thing.

Make them all laugh.

If not at me

Than with me.

Without my thigh gap or my lipstick

I only have these words.

For when they realise I am ugly

They are all I can be judged for.

Them and nothing more.

🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀

I wrote this poem during this time where I just feel so particularly inferior. All my friends are the most beautiful souls the world has to offer and I just don’t feel as beautiful as them. I’m the ugly one. The duff. And oftentimes I’ll have them tell me that I’m beautiful but I think what they don’t realise is the effort I put in every single day. I wear makeup to school (just enough so it looks natural) and I iron my hair everyday and I hide my body under my jumper and just hope they don’t see me for what I truly am.

The poem is supposed to illustrate how I feel without all that. Without the mask that I hide behind. Without pretty privilege. How my mind will go into overdrive with every word I say because “what if it’s the wrong thing”. Because if I can’t charm people with my looks (like how all my friends can), the words I speak are all I have.

And yes, I try to keep my account generally positive, but I think it’s also important to show the reality of it all. :) 🫀

#poetry is beautiful #writers and poets #one direction #louis tomlinson #writblr #young poets #poetry #poets of tumblr

[louisbxttxrfly]

Reblog if you genuinely support asexuals

It terrifies me that there’s so much raging passion in the lgbt+ community that insist on marginalizing asexuals and implying that asexuals don’t deserve to have safe spaces. There’s still so much acephobia so I just wanna know which blogs are genuinely supportive and a safe space for asexuals

[louisbxttxrfly]

It’s the rainbowification of the logo for me.

[louisbxttxrfly]

Remember the anxiety prior to Louis’ first tour?

We had the prophets of doom anons (it will be shut down, he’s not wearing a mask, they’re going to have to cancel so many shows) and the “concerned” anons (worrying about everything from to the strength of his voice to the ravages of smoking and alcohol).

They’re still out there talking of ticket sales and too much partying (and no one foresaw that one of the biggest tour hazards was nothing to do with a virus but rather Louis’ encounter with a wall).

This time, though, this time we have more of an inkling. We know about the outfits to be discussed and ranked. We know about Louis sharing everything from sweet moments with young fans to cupcakes. We know about the backstage antics and the onstage ones too from a band already bonded. We know about the strength of his crew and the brilliance of Josh recording it. We know about the joy of his shows both in person and online as fans share and community comes together.

This time he’s done proving, now he’s building. This time, we have an album full of music written specifically for this.

Looking forward to the celebration and the surprises. Looking forward to sharing it with you all.

[louisbxttxrfly]

Poetry 🫀🦋

I wrote this poem because sometimes I feel like the knowledge of the fact that I, as a person, is constantly being perceived by those around me, is terribly daunting. I feel like it can be scary, especially when you really want to be authentic, but you also really care about what people think of you.

Perception is a Flame’s Shadow

All their amiable eyes of spears,

Scanning my existence, awakening my fears.

Why must I be a canvas for their sight?

A subject to be analysed day and night.

Perception causes my mind to distort.

A lonely, shadow-dance of some sort

that waltzes to the melody of the mind's belief,

Creating in an opinion, reality's thief.

I should like for perception to cease her existence.

To hide away tentatively and keep her distance.

To have her flame diminish to ember,

so their opinion of me is not all they remember.

I am a rabbit in a moment of plight

waiting for a fox to come and hunt me at night.

Except nature is such that within reason lies all,

so why waste away in fear when I can discard caring's mediocre thrall?

I yearn to believe that their perceptions hold no key

to unlock the true intent residing within me.

I wish to dance to my own rhythm unafraid

and allow their perceptions to gradually fade.

But why is it that I care what they think?

That my hands tremble with every word I ink?Maybe it is the risk of their opinions being impaired,

or maybe it is simply because I am scared.

🫀🦋🫀🦋🫀🦋🫀🦋🫀🦋🫀🦋🫀🦋🫀🦋🫀🦋

Anyways, I’m extremely excited for Louis’ livestream!! Absolutely can’t wait! And your starts so soon omg!

#proud of louis #louis is art #louis tomlinson #ltwt 2023 #aotv #poetry #writer things #writeblr #female poets #poet #poetblr

[louisbxttxrfly]

I used to be incredibly assimilated within this fandom and I feel like a proud mom. A Mrs Hudson.

[louisbxttxrfly]

This is the lucky clover cat. reblog this in 30 seconds & he will bring u good luck and fortune.

[louisbxttxrfly]

🤣 RIP the one pap walk romance

[louisbxttxrfly]

Louis wore a Paraguay Long-Sleeved Jersey gifted to him by his Paraguay Fanclub during his visit to the country the past May 19th on a recently shared picture.

A mix of bright red and white, this jersey showcases a classic collar and long sleeves.

Congrats to LouisTPy (twitter) !

#no #cos now I’m just picturing him #doing that little pose #with his arms #in the same position as the second pic

[louisbxttxrfly]

Pilish Poetry ✏️🪐

Yesterday, I walked into math wishing I were anywhere but there. It’s not that I don’t enjoy math, it’s just that my enjoyment of the subject heavily depends on the content we’ll be covering on the day.

My math teacher proceeded to ask us if we’d ever heard of the term “Pilish”. Naturally, I wasn’t the only one who hadn’t.

He explained the concept to us and wrote out the first few digits on the board, instructing us to try writing a sentence using this system. I won’t lie, but I am a slight nerd when it comes to certain topics. I’m incredibly passionate about English, and adore the challenge it poses, so partaking in this activity was extremely mentally stimulating and rewarding for me :)

The sentence I made was: It’s a fact, I loved listening to Harry’s music all night.

This activity in school inspired me to tackle the challenge of incorporating Pilish into a poem, and so I did :D.

Emotional Alchemy

Cry a pool.

I saved raindrops to mirror tears.

Why waste tireless twilights weeping?

Cynically, it’s to wed constant fear.

Beauty to tragic life,

All aid trouble’s way.

We enliven sympathy’s grace,

To overlook despair’s stay.

I endlessly betroth a moment,

Whereinto our radiances intensify,

And weeping forms a valor,

Devoured by elegantly brusque deny.

Accolades kill loss,

Grief motivates to die.

Enamour sparkles a warmth,

With spirit of freedom’s air-sky.

So, emotions alternate valiantly.

Humanity exists in mistakes,

But life believes in faith

For love to I, a purpose quakes.

🪐✨🪐✨🪐✨🪐✨🪐✨🪐✨🪐✨🪐✨🪐✨

I hope you all enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it! :) I just wanted to say tysm to anyone who sees my posts and I really hope they can leave somewhat of an impact, or inspire you in some way. ❤️‍🩹

Also, Eid Mubarak to all those who celebrate 🕌🫀🌙✨

#poetry is beautiful #poetry #one direction #larry #louis tomlinson #larry stylinson #math #pi #pilish #writblur #writerscommunity #poets on tumblr

[louisbxttxrfly]

Poetry 🌷🧸

Clean // tw mention of sh

It’s been a year since I’ve given up art

It used to help me cope previously

My silver pen that drew red ink and stung me on my leg, you see.

And no, it didn’t make me feel better.

No, it didn’t make things right.

But it was all I had to offer me a liveliness

In those dead, lonely hours of the night.

I presume one could argue that I haven’t holistically

“Given

Up

Art”

One could say my previous works were a mockery from the start.

But I believe I’ve merely chosen a better medium

One that makes my smile, four hours, linger.

The therapy of brush strokes -

The songwriter to my singer.

To a world of thoughtless quiet,

My art transports me away

So I keep all my brushes

tucked away for the rainiest day.

🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷

This poem is about my journey to recovery from sh. It represents the light at the end of a excruciatingly long journey through an incredibly dark tunnel. I want anybody who struggles with self harm to know that it does get better. I want you to know that your body and mind will thank you, maybe not in the first week or month, but give it enough time and you’ll realise that it’s actually the best thing you can do for yourself. I love you all and I hope you all know that you’re never truly alone. ❤️‍🩹

#poetry #one direction #louis tomlinson #harry styles #writing #writerscommunity #writblur #poetblr #poetry is beautiful #sad poem #sh #I love you

[louisbxttxrfly]

As a person who is dying for book recommendations: What is a book you picked up randomly that you heard nothing about previously that blew you away?

I feel like we all have at least one hidden gem we stumbled upon.

Please reblog with your books in the tags :)

#one in a hundred thousand #an extremely light read #probably meant for like age 15 #but it’s so comforting?

[louisbxttxrfly]

i cant believe this

[louisbxttxrfly]

I was so happy the day these images and videos came out because I could just see his genuine ecstasy shining through his face. Like these video clips were on of the main things, for me, that truly highlighted that “I need you and you need me” relationship, and honestly in the wise words of Taylor Swift: “everybody moved on, I stayed there.”

These pictures still make me so warm and happy inside. They’re such comfort. 🫀

#larry #larry stylinson #louis tomlinson #one direction #louis #proud of Louis #louis Tomlinson comfort #he’s so comforting #he’s so precious #i’m so proud #i love him so much #Louies #Louie

[louisbxttxrfly]

cryingggggg

[louisbxttxrfly]

Poetry ✨🍄

Why can’t I be nothing

Why can’t I be nothing?

And not in the worthless way of alone,

Because for something to have no value it would have to exist,

And that’s not a very “nothing-like” unknown.

Why can’t I be perfect?

Because nothing is ever perfect.

Why can’t every strand of hair on my head

Weave itself beautifully like the notes of a song‘s gentle thread.

Why can’t I stride through life easily?

Because nothing is ever truly easy.

Why can’t I look in the mirror and love what is there,

Instead of feeling unbearably queasy.

Why can’t I effortlessly do well?

Because nothing effortless is ever done well.

I want to charm the world with my intelligence

Like a fairy with a clever little spell.

And yes, I know these thoughts are disgusting.

Yes, their existence should never have taken flight.

Why can’t these thoughts simply dissipate to nothing?

So I can live my life decorated in delight.

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

I wrote this poem because as a teenager of today, I feel like oftentimes we’re all striving to achieve to have this perception of ourselves that pleases others. And not necessarily in a people pleaser way, but more in a way where the way we’re perceived by others is in our control. And that’s not always the case. And I just think it’s important to remember not to let those thoughts win, because ultimately, if we do, we would all feel so valueless. Instead, although it’s hard, it’s so simply wonderful to embrace your worth ❤️✨🫀

#writblr #writerscommunity #writer things #writers and poets #female poets #poetry #poetry is beautiful #motivation #one direction #larry #larry stylinson #louis tomlinson

[louisbxttxrfly]

i love getting unseen footage and being reminded that they were insufferable