lovelyindespair

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HAYLEY ATWELL as PEGGY CARTER / CAPTAIN CARTER in DOCTOR STRANGE IN THE MULTIVERSE OF MADNESS (2022) dir. Sam Raimi

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Franz Kafka // Sylvia Plath

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Hey, I hate myself. Whaddup?

#personal #it’s a hate yourself kind of night

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“When you’re struggling with something, look at all the people around you and realise that every single person you see is struggling with something.”

— Nicholas Sparks

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“I used to think I was the strangest person in the world but then I thought there are so many people in the world, there must be someone just like me who feels bizarre and flawed in the same ways I do … Well, I hope that if you are out there and read this and know that, yes, it’s true I’m here, and I’m just as strange as you.”

—

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““A room without books is like a body without a soul.””

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Sometimes I wonder why I was always a second rate grandkid, a last resort niece, a only-because-no-one-else-picked-up cousin

Being all those turned me into a never-call friend, an absent bestie, an arms-length daughter, and a distant partner.

I became very comfortable in the recesses of the minds of others, a second thought, a blip on the radar.

Watching those who shared my blood stand on their podiums and pedastels, looking with disdain at me and my closest, ingrained me with an odd feeling that stays with me even now, almost two decades later.

I wasn’t wanted by most, not wanted by those alleged to want me most.

Why would I believe anyone really wants me now?

#abusive childhood #emotional abuse #does anyone even read these #personal #me #the eldest grandkid no one wanted #orphaned in a family of hundreds #never wanted not even now

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Ocean Vuong, On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous

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There will come a day, when I no longer have to speak to my mother.

I look forward to it.

#toxic parents