madebycoffee

[madebycoffee]

Chapter 43.5

Idiot.

The voice in my head is persistent. It’s been over two months but it’s not letting up.

I try to focus on the lines, struggling to keep the faint remnants of my Tartosan accent from creeping into Llama Man’s commanding voice. It’s always more difficult just after I’ve been home.

Idiot.

Images from the last year keep flashing by, little details seared into my brain. Her green eyes. Her smile. The delicate birthmarks artfully strewn across her face. I used to insist on kissing each of them goodbye before I left and it always made her laugh.

It was the best sound in the world.

Idiot.

The more recent images are a different story. Her tears. The look of shock and confusion in her eyes. She didn’t understand, of course, and some days I’m not sure I do either. Am I an idiot for leaving her? Or for letting myself fall in love with her in the first place?

Both?

“Alright, Paul, that was good, but let’s do an extra take just to be sure.”

I nod at the sound technician and start over.

“I’ve sent the files off to Mike. Personally, I don’t think he’ll demand another round, the last two takes were flawless.”

“Thanks. I’m sorry for dragging you in for pick-ups again, I’ve been feeling a bit off lately.”

“Hey, it’s a pay check. And I’m going to need it for the move. We want to get settled into the new house before my son’s wedding so we’re already packing.”

“Did you find a job in Henford yet?”

“Not yet, but my wife got an offer. We’ll make it work. My kid is the only family I have left, so if he moves abroad, we follow. And I never liked staying in one place for too long anyway, I get restless.”

“Well, best of luck over there, Charles. The new sound tech will have some big shoes to fill.”

“Thanks, Paul. It’s been a pleasure working with you.”

Charles leaves, and I turn on the coffee machine.

I’ve just finished pouring two mugs when Lee arrives.

“Oh, you must have read my mind, love, I am positively dying for a coffee right now.”

“When are you not?”

Lee settles onto the sofa with a sigh.

“It’s been one of those weeks, deadlines put such a damper on my creativity. But how was Tartosa? Did you have a nice birthday?”

“It was fine. I didn’t feel like making it a huge thing, but my mother had arranged a family dinner at the vineyard.”

“Ah, just an intimate and completely non-threatening gathering with fifteen to twenty people, then.”

I lean back against the counter and take a long sip of the coffee to avoid responding. It’s still too hot, and I grimace as the liquid burns my mouth. Idiot.

Lee isn’t so easily deterred, though.

“So, that’s it? You’re just never going to see her again?”

“Lee, first of all, she blocked me. On my birthday, no less. So I’m going to take that as a big fat hint and respect her wishes. Second, I broke up with her because it was a dead end. She’s not going to settle down for another decade, and when she does, she’s not going to pick some fifty year old relic.”

Lee raises an eyebrow.

“I beg your pardon?”

“Yeah, I said it. Sorry to break it to you, Lee, but you’re old. Ancient. Practically dust.”

“I’m choosing to ignore your hurtful remarks because you’re clearly heartbroken and out of your mind with grief.”

I snort. “Sorry. I’m fine, really, I’m just annoyed at myself.”

“For irrationally breaking up with the love of your life or for stubbornly refusing to reconsider?”

“For being an idiot in general, I guess. I knew it was a bad idea. I even told her as much the first time I met her. But then I just had to go back and talk to her again like a complete dumbass and she practically invited herself back to my hotel. How could I say no to that?”

Lee chuckles. “Oh, but you couldn’t, of course you couldn’t. I mean, she’s not exactly my type, but I can still appreciate the aesthetics, as it were.”

“Right? And that might even have been fine if it never went any further, but I got carried away and kept seeing her even though everyone could tell it was going to end badly. We’re both better off like this, I’ll get over it.”

Lee just looks at me over the rim of his glasses.

“Are you sure? I may be a dusty old relic but as far as I’m aware, the only way you could possibly know that she blocked you is if you spent your birthday trying to look her up.”

“Thanks, detective. It was a moment of weakness, you don’t need to rub it in my face.”

“I’m not trying to rub anything in your face, love, I know it’s not your thing. But you were clearly serious about her if you were planning to bring her to Tartosa. And just because the poor girl understandably got slightly intimidated, you drop her like a newborn giraffe. Why not give her some more time?”

“I didn’t… Lee, it was the sensible thing to do! I just turned forty, I can’t just spend years waiting for her to make up her mind and hope for the best.”

“I don’t share your fetish for monogamy, but I believe all relationships are like that, you can never be certain. But you’ve always been stubborn so I’ll just give you the usual break-up advice. Get a haircut, hit the gym, put yourself back out there. Will you at least see my stylist?”

“Never. I am not brave enough to let Jessica Clemons near my wardrobe.”

beginning / previous / next

#reblog #holding lee in my hands like this 🤲

[madebycoffee]

this new kit is BLACKity BLACK and LOVE IT

#reblog

[madebycoffee]

sorry i overreacted i had no idea everything would be fine

#reblog #yeah

[madebycoffee]

btw did u know i post poses on my side blog too?

Oh hello, while I'm waiting for inspiration to start on the next section of legacy I thought I'd share some of the backlog of poses I have. Been meaning to share these out for a while, but enjoy some poses I made for all the squad in high school. :)

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for the couch poses you will need hulazombie's phone acc for 2 of them. download here!

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In game they are called High School Poses and it comes with 14 poses! Enjoy!

TOU: Don't put any shit I make behind a paywall that's it.

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sfs l mediafire

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check out other poses I've shared here

#reblog #also tumblr keeps hiding whatever i post on the dash -__- #i have done nothing wrong damnit!! #anyway the reason i share some on the side vs. here is because the ones i share here i prefer to be more put together #also there's just a bunch of odd ones that don't really fit anywhere else so its easier to shove em all into one spot

[madebycoffee]

Down the Aisle | Next

Actual vows under the cut!

Jayce's vows to Hope:

"I'm going to wake you up every morning with kisses, but on your forehead, because morning breath. I love you more than you knew was ever possible. This is just the start. I promise never to burn your pancakes because I just hit level 5 cooking babe. I'm going to be your best friend, your lover, your confidant, your shoulder, your ear, your pillow. I'll help you take those super high heels off after work and rub your toesies. I'm not perfect, Hope, I'm flawed. And where I'm flawed, you're not. You're the lobster to my thermidor, you're the beef to my wellington, the noodles to my minced pork, the flirty to my heart cookies. I promise to love you forever, forever ever, forever ever. And ever and ever."

Hope's vows to Jayce:

"Jayce you have a smile that lights up my entire life. You're the sun, but not as dangerous as the murder circle in the sky. You have a beautiful way of wrapping me up and reassuring me with words alone. You finish my sentences, you talk me through my troubles, you have the best solutions, you have the goofiest laugh and the best dad jokes. I love the little songs you hum when you're concentrating. I want to hear you hum forever. I want to hear you laugh forever. I want to see you smile forever. I love the way you love me and I'm going to love you back harder than you knew was ever possible. You're the yorkshire to my pudding, the aubergine to my parmesean, the lovely mushroom to my soup, the buttered jam to my crumpets, the pie to my cottage. I promise to love you forever, forever ever, forever ever. And ever and ever."

#;__; happy anniversary #them crazy kids now with kids of their own wow bless #reblog

[madebycoffee]

Previous // Next

Catching up.. ☕

Tristen: It’s pretty here, right? Matilda: For sure-.. but I wanna know how you ended up in Tartosa of all places. T: I guess it just kinda happened. M: [laughs] Yeah, but how? You randomly got on a plane one time and that was it? T: Pretty much! I didn’t exactly set out with a plan. I ended up in Moonwood Mill for a bit but it was kinda dead n’ I was running outta cash-.. decided I’d head to Del Sol ‘cause why not? Big enough place to get lost in and plenty of dead-end jobs, y’know? M: I didn’t think you’d wanna head somewhere so busy. T: I didn’t really think about that at the time-.. hated it the minute I got off the bus though. I overheard some guy speaking Tartosan in the smoking area n’ thought, fuck it. M: And that was that? T: Yeah, it sounds stupid now. M: Little bit-.. were you high by any chance? T: Little bit. M: [snorts] At least it worked out. T: I kinda love it here, everything’s so chill and relaxed-.. I did think about coming back sometimes, or visiting at least but… M: I get it. T: Do you? You’re here, I never had the guts to come back. M: I was dragged here. T: You didn’t want to come? M: I did, it was just… T: I get it-.. maybe you’d have been dragged here sooner if I’d told you where I was. M: Maybe. T: I’m sorry I ghosted you; I didn’t really mean to but the longer-… M: I know, it’s okay. T: Not if it made you mad. M: I think I was sadder than anything. T: That’s worse. M: Well.. I forgive you, so shut up. T: I’ll make it up to you.

Matilda cast a lopsided smile into her lunch, avoiding Tristen’s gaze. God, why was everything so difficult with him, so awkward? Men were easy, and Matilda knew exactly how to play each one to her advantage; it never took long to figure out how to get them hooked; she asked, she got-.. usually. But she didn’t want to play Tristen, she wanted him to love her without being cajoled, manipulated or asked. In some ways it seemed obvious that he already did, but Matilda had never played this game before, how could she be sure? She could ask outright, she supposed, but it felt impossible and far too vulnerable a task to bear.

T: So, what’s new with you? M: Nothing much, it doesn’t feel like anything’s really changed in the last few years. T: Take it you worked everything out with the whole Pixie thing though? M: I’m like a fun aunt, I suppose-.. all the good parts of having a kid without any of the hard stuff. T: Does she know you’re her mom? M: Yeah, we’ve explained that it’s a bit different but she’ll probably understand it better as she gets older. Ivan does a good enough job on his own though, so she doesn’t really care. T: Why the long face then..? M: I feel bad for him, I guess-.. him and Bruno are probably gonna break up. T: Oh, how come? M: It’s complicated. T: Chalk and cheese, right? M: Something like that. Breakups really fuck him up though and I can tell he’s wondering what he did wrong, as if it was his fault-.. he did the same thing when we broke up, blamed himself. I really broke his heart, y’know? Like, he was trying his best that time around and I threw it back in his face; not that I think we would’ve worked out in the end, but still… T: Yeah, but that was then. M: Do we really change all that much? T: I think most of us do; or can, if we want to. M: I don’t know… T: Are you seeing anyone now, like..? M: I kinda was.

Matilda shocked herself with her honesty, realising she probably should’ve lied; Triss must think she was a slut by now, always with someone new-.. someone pointless and vapid.

M: Nothing serious, he was an idiot. T: I sense a story… M: Well, everything was fine, everything was casual-.. and then he changed his mind, and got mad when I didn’t. T: Can you blame him-.. for changing his mind? M: Tch, that’s beside the point. T: Fair. M: He proposed to me, just.. out of the blue, and this was after numerous conversations where I’d told him I wasn’t into the whole kids n’ marriage thing. T: Okay, he definitely sounds like an idiot now. M: I said yes.

Matilda’s laughter hitched in her throat as Tristen’s face fell; teasing him suddenly didn’t seem so fun anymore.

M: I’m kidding! T: God-.. I just called the guy an idiot. M: Uh-huh. T: So, that’s over? M: I think he finally got the message; I’ve been ignoring him for months now-.. how about you, anyway?

Tristen laughed out loud, immediately clearing his throat with embarrassment; as though he hadn’t meant to declare his presence to those around them.

T: Uh, no. M: That’s it, just no? All this time, no flings, no nothing? T: C’mon, you know I’m no good at those-.. figured I’d be better off without the hassle. M: Guess it’s better than ending up with another Vicky. T: Exactly! M: I find it hard to believe no one’s at least tried. T: Aha, I guess there’s been a few-.. I dunno though, I always attract the wrong type. M: Yeah, maybe you do…

#reblog #im ;__; #i think matilda might be the one throughout all of this that has grown on me the most #her and ivan both... #like you think back to where they both started vs now and..... i cannot believe it #but i love it #;__; #also it's me im the one trying to get at tristan and he just wont give me a chance 😭

[madebycoffee]

beginning | previous - next

#reblog #:') #it's what she deserves lookit her #this is the key to happiness #no rat men in ur life #kiara get with the program

[madebycoffee]

📩 Simblr question of the day: It's time to appreciate the small things! What's a small detail from one of your posts that you love? Could be a small tattoo on a sim, specific clutter in a sims' room, a little detail in a render or screenshot, whatever is applicable to you

(p.s. I've been scouring simblr, and I've noticed people don't like how picky SQOTD feels, so please! Share around SQOTD asks, anon or not, I'm only one person and can't find and ask every person on simblr ~ 💛)

huLLO! one of my favorite little details I do is with all the poses I make for my simblr. It might take me extra long to get posts done because I'm making 50 odd poses for every little thing rather than reusing them, but it means I can add in things like:

Sorella frequently sitting with her legs crossed like this

My favorite set of wives (raina and cordy) very frequently hold each other's necks when smoochin:

And then two things with Cordy I do in poses specifically is 1. when she's nervous she fidgets with her hands:

(tho she doesn't do this much anymore)

And 2. she sleeps everywhere:

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I don't even think I do this that on purpose, it's just since I always export rigs for specific people I just end up bestowing pose mannerisms to them in blender. 🤣 Thank u for the ask! I'll be sure to pass it along boss 🫡

#Anonymous #simblr question of the day #o btw i turned anon back on a few weeks ago #use it responsibly pls #all these sims from me sideblog madebysimblr by the waaaay

[madebycoffee]

Slutboy (cowboy, but make him slutty™)

#reblog #i am looking and i will not say how respectfully that looking is #yeehaw!!

[madebycoffee]

sometimes the in game animations are spot on. gian was horrified at w/e keith was saying. keith spawned a cupcake outta no where. and then the coffee simself popped in between the two of them to give them looks. sometimes this game isn't so bad 🤣

#simblr #ts4 #giancarlo nyugen #keith adamson #did u miss these two b/c i did #when he pulled the cupcake out i started cackling lmaoooo #coffee simself #that's her tag ig #thats her name in game too i changed it from my Government Name

[madebycoffee]

Safe to say that Lainey isn't a fan of Felix's new hobby.

#reblog #bibbit.... incredible

[madebycoffee]

im having a silly fun little time with my simself, i went to go say hello to keith and gian since that's the save i stuck her in and

LMAO and in keeping with Gianlerette tradition, she finds keith more attractive than gian.

#madebycoffee speaks #delete later #specifically when talking to keith she gets a flirty 'he has a nice ass' moodlet #great work here

[madebycoffee]

#reblog #unless i get VERY on top of it the q on my simblr usually has 5-10 in it #there was this one time i drafted 100 posts to put in my q before i let it start posting... wow... who was she

[madebycoffee]

before n after of said simself in case u were curious, or in case u thought i looked like gian since that is my icon 🤣

this is p accurate if i do say so myself 💃🤸‍♀️ down to me having a mole in that exact spot on my face lol

i have a simself from 2018 that i just went in an updated and it's wild to see how much change there was to input 💀

#reblog #i posted a picture of her in a server just asking thoughts and ended up getting ROASTED lmAOOO #hilarious stuff #also do u like my super quick recolor i did for me hair lol

[madebycoffee]

i have a simself from 2018 that i just went in an updated and it's wild to see how much change there was to input 💀

#madebycoffee speaks #i do have to go recolor some hair for myself tho #there are actually 0 brown hair swatches that also have purple as the fun additional color

[madebycoffee]

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ takuya owns my whole heart and soul now i apologize for how many thot-tastic edits of him i will do (im not actually sorry)

happy takuya butt thursday ig ehehe

#ts4 #simblr #takuya kato #i just think hes neat ur honor #man butt monday #except it's actually #takuya butt thursday #WOW #marked mature for booty

[madebycoffee]

Matilda: I hate you so much right now. Mia: Psh, it’s like ripping a band aid off! Over n’ done with. Matilda: I’m gonna go cease to exist-.. bye. Mia: Waaait, how’d it go?!

[Mia cackled, shaking her head as Matilda gave her the middle finger and scurried away]

Mia: It’s so weird to see her all flustered n’ shit, I love it. Ivan: I dunno if y’should be getting’ her hopes up about all this.

Mia: God, not you too! What do you meaaan? Ivan: He might be with someone else or somethin’ by now-.. they pissed around for so long, y’know? Mia: Did you see the way he dropped me? Ivan: Have y’seen him..? Mia: Hah! Not my type. Ivan: [scoffs] Whatever. Mia: Don’t be jealous.

Ivan: I ain’t fuckin’ jealous-.. s’just weird getting’ so involved in someone else’s shit, I don’t like meddlin’, it don’t sit right. Mia: Ugh, me neither-.. like, who cares? But she’s been doing my head in ever since she got that letter n’ I was planning on taking a trip anyway, so two birds one stone! Potentially…

Ivan: Well, you’ve done y’bit now, let’s leave off. Mia: Gladly-.. unless you want me to flex my newfound matchmaking skills on you? Ivan: Tch, Bruno’s side of the bed ain’t even cold yet. Mia: I dunno, he’s been skipping on you for a while now-.. you two done?

Ivan: Can we not? Mia: It’s not like you to keep it all in, buddy. Ivan: Yeah, yeah.. maybe later. Pixie: Daddy look! A CRAB! Ivan: Don’t pick it u-… Pixie: AHHHHHHHH! Mia: She picked it up. Ivan: She always does.

Previous // Next

#reblog #reblog for 🦀 #pixie vs crab the ultimate showdown