seems reasonable
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t shirt that says "I AM AN UNREPENTANT SEXUAL PERVERT" and the back says "ASK ME ABOUT MY SOCIALLY UNACCEPTABLE FETISHES" i exclusively wear it to target
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i know my ass is up too late because i’m losing my fucking mind over accidentally typing george of the gungle
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One time I brought one of my rocks with me on a plane to touch to calm me down during the flight, but it fell out of my pocket on my way back to the bathroom and then as soon as i realized this they actually announced “did anyone lose…… . A rock” over the loudspeaker system.
When I went up to claim it the plane man, clearly unable to throw off the shackles of his training in the procedure of asking for people’s full names and birthdates when they come to claim wallets, said “wait no, first tell me what color it is so I know it’s really yours”
He seemed to realize this was stupid directly after saying it and kind of smiled like to make it a joke but the joke was on him bc I Described the fucking rock to him for like 30 solid seconds
…anyway. that was an interaction I had once
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Timothy Chalamet passed away last night after choking on a single frozen unchewed green pea. Family members confirmed his passing in a statement to the media "it's how he liked to eat them"
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lately i've been thinking "what if there was a show called hate on the spectrum and it's just about a bunch of autistic people who hate each other" and then i remembered it's always sunny in philadelphia exists
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*open mouth kissing little Caesar with my hand up his toga*
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plagues history and global epidemiology as an autistic special interest was already a heavy topic but not a day goes by I dont briefly recall drunkenly telling people at the bar in autumn 2019 “yeah the next pandemic will probably be a coronavirus and we’re due for one”
if they remember that i have to wonder if they think they met the devil at the club that night
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just asked the barista for a “12 inch” latte rather than “12 ounce” latte, tried to correct myself, and did it again.
I’m alive awake alert enthusiastic today, clearly
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within fifteen minutes i have found two different grown adult men who have dating app profiles that say their worst fear is:
werewolves.
one was funny. two is like... hang on, do we actually have a werewolf problem in this town?
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you: suck my dick
me, an intellectual: inhale my richard
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Mean Girls (2004) House MD (2009)
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Sorry to speak this into existence but the fanfic that’s going to be written for this movie might just be the discourse catalyst strong enough to destroy this site
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Love the "quality check" portion of the Domino's tracker. I imagine some 14 year old Domino's worker stoned out of their mind doing this for a few minutes
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