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milenadaniels · 1 year
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'it's their anniversary on sunday' + buddie 💗 ily
It’s their anniversary on Sunday. Two more days and they will have been married for a year—a whole 366 days—and it has gone by so quickly that it feels like no time at all.
In the grand scheme of things, it is no time at all. Not enough, certainly, although Eddie isn’t sure that’s much of a quantifier since forever wouldn’t feel like enough time with Buck. Which is... It’s funny, really, because forever was a concept he didn’t really believe in before Buck, but now it feels like the bare minimum, anything else impossible to imagine.
He’s trying not to do that now: imagine. Where he went wrong, what he could have done better, the conversation he’s going to need to have with their kids when he goes home.
“Eddie,” Bobby says quietly from behind him.
Eddie shakes his head. He knows what Bobby is going to say. He knows what the look on his captain’s face is going to be if he turns around.
Bobby comes closer, hand finding Eddie’s shoulder, his voice sure when he says, “It’s not your fault.”
Except—
”She’s going to fall.”
“And what if you fall?” snappy with adrenaline, with fear, the building trembling around them.
Buck’s gaze steady, steady, always trusting. “You’ll catch me.”
And Eddie didn’t. 
He was meant to catch Buck—was meant to have Buck’s back, always and forever, til death do them part and then some—and he failed. So it doesn’t matter what Bobby says, doesn’t matter how sure he sounds, it doesn’t even matter if Buck wakes up from surgery and doesn’t blame him either. Eddie will always blame himself.
“It’s our anniversary on Sunday,” he says, and his voice sounds numb and distant to his own ears.
“I know,” Bobby says, squeezing his shoulder. “Have you already got Buck a gift?”
“Socks,” Eddie replies, which sounds stupid and insignificant when he says it out loud, but. “His feet are always cold, he complains about it all the time, and they’ve got little fire emojis on them.”
They also say “hot stuff” on the soles, but Bobby doesn’t need to know that.
“He’ll love them,” Bobby says, smiling.
Buck will love them, Eddie knows that. He’s just not sure he’ll get the chance to see that familiar, delighted grin light up his husband’s face.
Eddie presses the heels of his hands against his eyes. He’s vaguely aware that he’s shaking, but he can’t work out whether it’s cold, or shock, or something else.
“Okay,” Bobby murmurs, and then he’s sitting sideways on the bench and pulling Eddie against his chest, arms wrapping around him in a tight hug. “Okay, I’ve got you. It’s going to be okay.”
Is it?
What if it isn’t?
“I can’t—” Eddie starts, but he can’t even bear to finish the thought.
The thing about grief is that it doesn’t get easier with practice. Eddie has lost more people than he can count, but none of it has come close to preparing him for the possibility of losing Buck.
“You can,” Bobby says, his voice steady.
Eddie knows he isn’t the only one who has been beaten down by grief before. He’s not the only one who has shied away from helping hands even as they dragged him out of the darkness. He’s not the only one whose heart will crumble, maybe fall apart completely, if Buck doesn’t make it through this.
He brings a hand up, holding tight to the arm Bobby has wrapped around his chest. He feels so old and unbelievably young when he whispers, “He’s going to be okay, right? Tell me he’s going to be okay, Bobby.”
“Eddie, you know I can’t tell you that.”
Eddie squeezes his eyes shut. He does know that, but. “Please.”
Bobby squeezes him, his voice rumbling through his chest and into Eddie’s bones when he answers: “Buck is going to be okay. I promise.”
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milenadaniels · 2 years
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5.09 | 6.01
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milenadaniels · 2 years
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the fact that buck has slept on eddie’s couch several times, like this is canon, and eddie is the one to tell him that buck’s couches have all been given and provided by his ex girlfriends… THINK ABOUT IT. the only couch he’s never had to give up has been eddie's !!!!!!!!!!!!!
how do you expect me to be normal about that damn scene?!?! IT'S SO LOUD.
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milenadaniels · 2 years
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Quick reminder that if you forget exactly what happened in an episode of 9-1-1 or need dialogue for a creation you can go here and find transcripts for every episode.
If you click an episode title and it brings you to the search function, just type it into the bar and it will come up.
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milenadaniels · 2 years
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milenadaniels · 2 years
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SALAD THEORY FOLK RISE UP
Things I’m not over:
HOMEMADE SALAD.
HOMEMADE LASAGNA.
Chris/Eddie went to Buck’s couchless apartment!? Voluntarily!? Why? Why not go to the Diaz house? No, they really got in the car and said “hey let’s go to Buck’s house even though there’s no place for us to watch tv or play a video game because there’s literally no place to sit but at the island/table” because they don’t need tv or video games they just need Buck. I’m not here. I’m away. I’m not okay.
I’m not even going to touch the “3 tries” or the couch because just get out of my face with that. It was basically an engagement and that's all there is to it.
The fact that there’s a BIG GLARING HOLE where Buck’s couch used to be. The fact that he never picked out his own couch. The fact that “Buck’s couch” is in Eddie’s goddamn living room and WE ALL KNOW IT.
I can’t. Leave a message. I’m not here.
In a conversation about making the right romantic choices, couches, and trying three times, the fucking staging of the goddamn lasagna next to the GENUINE beer.
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milenadaniels · 2 years
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I finally got to listen and I am beside myself!!! I can't believe this is your first podfic! Thank you so much for this! 💛 Even the art is amazing???
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[Podfic] Before the Night Fades
My first podfic! A reading of the wonderful Before the Night Fades by @milenadaniels. I love this fic so much, I knew it was exactly the one I wanted to revisit for my first time recording a podfic.  
Length: 47 minutes 24 seconds  Format: Streaming + MP3 + M4B Rating: Teen & Up Fandom: 9-1-1 (TV)  Relationship: Evan “Buck” Buckley/Eddie Diaz Warnings: No Archive warnings apply Links: AO3, archive.org, Google Drive Summary: 
“I have a bottle of champagne, four champagne flutes, one engagement ring to go into one of those champagne flutes, and a note to deliver it all to table 34 with dessert,” Tomas explains, wide-eyed, throwing his hand back to the prep station where said champagne is waiting on ice next to four flutes and a small ring box. “Okay?” “Okay so there’s two men and two women and I have no idea who’s getting proposed to. I’m not even 100% on who came with who.“ — Or, EddieAna and BuckTaylor double date and it ruins everyone’s night.
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milenadaniels · 2 years
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buddie + romance
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milenadaniels · 2 years
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#return of the queen 😌✨
[Image Description: 4 large gifs of Maddie Buckley, from season 5, episode 18. She is at the new dispatch center, wearing her dispatcher’s uniform. Gif 1: A shot of Maddie settling into her chair, reaching up to put on her headset. Gif 2: A close up of Maddie from a different angle, as she adjusts her headset, and lifts her head as a call comes in. Gif 3: Maddie takes a deep breath and answers, “9-1-1.” Gif 4: Maddie continues, saying, “What’s your emergency?” And then smiles privately to herself. /End ID]
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milenadaniels · 2 years
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Can’t wait for the moment next season when Buck is teasing Chimney for the umpteenth time about Maddie, all “Y’all are raising a kid together and clearly are in love with each other no matter what you’re pretending” and Chim finally snaps and is like “You mean like you and Eddie?!?”
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milenadaniels · 2 years
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From this askreddit post lol imagine buddie in this situation. I feel like this could work with either of them
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milenadaniels · 2 years
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How are all y'all "Buck gets amnesia" truthers feeling tonight?
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milenadaniels · 2 years
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2x01 / 5x18
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milenadaniels · 2 years
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GOD buck amnesia in season six and eddie retelling their friendship to buck in the hospital but instead of calling it a friendship he calls their story “a love story” amnesia fics are literally real timothy get out of ao3 challenge
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milenadaniels · 2 years
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he wants you too (you just have to ask him) [5x18 spec | 464 words]
“May I have this dance?”
Eddie looks up in time to see Buck lifting Jee Yun into his arms, Maddie shaking her head fondly as Buck begins gently spinning him and his niece around.
Something swoops in Eddie’s chest as Jee begins giggling in Buck’s arms and Buck’s smiling so wide that surely his face must ache with it and it’s like Eddie’s heart is right there spinning with them.
“Pretty sure he’d say yes, if you asked him.”
Eddie thanks his years of military training for not startling straight out of his seat, Maddie—who had somehow made it across the yard without him noticing—stands beside him, arms cross and a relaxed—almost amused—smile spread across her face.
“I’m not—I don’t—”
Maddie raises an eyebrow, “You’ve been watching him all afternoon—but somehow I get the sense you don’t quite realize he’s been watching you back.”
Eddie blinks, heating rising in his face—he had caught glimpses of Buck’s eyes on him but he had trouble letting himself think it could possibly be for the same reason his eyes were on Buck.
“You should ask him to dance,” Maddie continues, looking over at her brother and daughter, “he’ll say yes.”
Eddie lets his own gaze wander back to Buck, “How can you be so sure?”
“Call it ‘sister’s intuition’—or, if you prefer—Chim calls it the ‘stupid big heart eyes’ you guys keep making at each other.”
Eddie’s face is definitely flushed, but he looks over at Maddie, feeling bold, “you should ask Chim to dance—he’ll say yes too, you know.”
Eddie doesn’t miss the way Maddie’s eyes wander to Chim, dancing with Karen while Hen laughs.
“You think so?”
“He’s got a bit of his own case of ‘stupid big heart eyes’ y’know.”
“Yeah,” Maddie says softly, and then she ducks her head,  “I just don’t wanna mess things up again.”
Eddie places a comforting hand on her arm, “I can’t promise you that it’ll always be perfect, but you and Chim—you love each other—you shouldn’t let the fear of something happening stop you from being happy.”
Maddie’s silent for a moment, and then she meets his eyes, she gives him a watery smile, “those are pretty wise words, Diaz, have you considered listening to them yourself?”
Eddie’s eyes widen with realization and then he laughs softly, “yeah, maybe I should.”
“Ask him to dance,” Maddie repeats.
“Will you?” He can’t help but ask back, “ask Chim?”
Maddie glances over at Chim, who’s let Hen take over for him, “I think I will.”
Eddie looks over at Buck, he’s stopped spinning Jee and moved to rocking her gently in his arms, their eyes meet across the yard and he smiles so brightly at Eddie that Eddie feels like it could blind him.
“I think I will too.”
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milenadaniels · 2 years
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Chris being held by his dads
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milenadaniels · 2 years
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thinking abt eddie saying chris loves [ana] so much and how buck is chris’s go to and second parent and how buck thought he could learn to live with the ugly parts of taylor but he was there at eddie’s lowest and loved him anyway without hesitation. haha. thinking abt it.
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