miss-mandragore

[miss-mandragore]

Love to wake up in my lesbian separatist paradise (single bedroom apartment) and drink my elixir (cheap black coffee) and smoke my herbs (poorly rolled joint) and commence the chants (play indigo girls CD) and cast spells (masturbate in the shower) and make ambrosia (oatmeal) and annoint myself (roll on my patchouli and vanilla oils) and put on my amulet (necklace from mom) and unlock arcane knowledge (guided meditation) and go on a mystical journey (walk uptown)

[miss-mandragore]

tshirt that says MY COCK IS HUGE AND MY GRIP ON REALITY IS TENUOUS AND MY COCK IS AVERAGE

[miss-mandragore]

god I wish I was a sheep being gently but firmly held down and sheared by a butch lesbian

[miss-mandragore]

god gives his most specific, hard to explain genders to his strongest dykes

[miss-mandragore]

a dyke will take 1 bong rip and suddenly blush to tears over heart eyes howell

[miss-mandragore]

thinking about dan and phil and how nice it must be...."make coffee"...."toast the bread"..."our favourite pastry is back in stock"..."i feel lonely, call me?"..."facetime me?"

oh to exist with someone. oh to live alongside someone.

[miss-mandragore]

when i was a kid i wanted to be a famous youtuber like dan and phil so that people would gay ship me with my irl best friend and we would be sooo weirded out by it and laugh and make videos joking about it but secretly it would make her realize her repressed gay crush on me and i'd help her through her gay crisis and then we would have a sickeningly sweet sappy romance and read fanfiction about ourselves together... anyways just found out she's married to a guy in the mafia now so i probably don't have a chance

[miss-mandragore]

WHOS THIS TWINK PHIL as dan’s reaction to seeing the decorator vs HEY!!! NONE OF THAT!!!! as phil’s reaction to dan saying he might kiss a girl in prague… oh man

[miss-mandragore]

being held would be so cool. wish physical touch was real

[miss-mandragore]

the fact that they both went to the same pastry place in sweden and ordered the same thing... this is more than invisible string theory this is rock hard proof that soulmateism is real and it's dan and phil

[miss-mandragore]

[miss-mandragore]

me at 5pm: being single is objectively the healthiest choice for me and I don’t feel like dating anyway and don’t enjoy using dating apps, I’m fine with it

me at 10pm: My God I’m so lonely So I open the window To hear sounds of people To hear sounds of people Venus planet of love Was destroyed by global warming Did its people want too much too Did its people want too much And I don't want your pity I just want somebody near me Guess I'm a coward I just want to feel alright And I know no one will save me i just need someone to kiss Give me one good honest kiss And I'll be alright Nobody, nobody, nobody Nobody, nobody Ooh, nobody, nobody, nobody I've been big and small And big and small And big and small again And still nobody wants me Still nobody wants me And I know no one will save me I'm just asking for a kiss Give me one good movie kiss And I'll be alright Nobody, nobody, nobody Nobody, nobody Ooh, nobody, nobody Nobody, nobody, nobody Nobody, nobody, nobody, nobody Nobody, nobody, nobody, nobody Nobody, nobody, nobody (nobody) (Nobody, nobody) Nobody, nobody Nobody, nobody, no

[miss-mandragore]

they should have naptime at work, and silent reading time, and recess , and

[miss-mandragore]

nagata kabi / alison bechdel

[miss-mandragore]

‘dont die wondering’ was such a beautiful slogan for lesbians we need to bring that back in a major way

[miss-mandragore]

Disgusting (highly aroused)

[miss-mandragore]

it’s psychological horror to YOU. to me it’s a romcom