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Monday is my last exam, but I'll have to work for the board of my association after, so I'm always busy...
I do love doing board-stuff so I'll count it as not stressing stuff. I'm excited!! But first, my last exam...
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Guys I have an exam on thursday and I'm stressing the fuck out😲😲
I think it's a lost cause but I should still try. It's a saying in my country: never shot, always lost.
How do you study a books worth of content in a day?? I've been reading the chapters like it's fucking Divergent but I still don't know anything....
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I finished a project!! I spend wayyyyy too much time on it but it's perfect now. I'm really proud and want to tell it to everyone around (which I really shouldn't, it's my 14 year old brother and his friends...).
I'm going to start planning my weekend now, and maybe clean up my room. I don't really know how to start studying for my resit, so I'm putting it off until I can't avoid it any longer.
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My laptop has been in the shop the last two days. I took it as an excuse not to complete any work.
I'm going to start studying for a resit today!! No putting it off anymore.
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I've been procrastinating my anti-procrastination tumblr-account...
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I tried to find support with my best friend / roommate about my shame over "failure". I discussed it with my dad before and he thought it would be a good idea to have someone in my corner who's going through a similar process.
I got advice that kind of criticized my way of handling the situation. However, I know already I didn't handle it well. I felt ashamed about that. I feel more ashamed and a little hurt now.
I think I'm not going to share a lot about this with my friend anymore. I'll probably try to find a therapist thats doing online sessions now. It'll probably make me feel better and help more than what's happening now.
I'd like to be able to talk about these kind of struggles with others, but we make it worse when we try to help without being asked. Listen to the needs of your communication-partner.
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Today I ditched my groupmates during their meeting, because I hadn't finished my own assignments and I didn't want to/couldn't handle the pressure and shame... In a result of that I felt almost scared to start studying.
I know failure is not shameful. I know they probably wouldn't have hated me or judged me terribly. I just felt so ashamed I couldn't just do it, or own up to my "failure".
I'm going to make some coffee and work late/get up super early. My consequence is that I now have a mountain of work to do and I can't see past my stress.
Procrastination is a bitch but I'd better push myself and own up to my mistakes than let myself get paralysed by fear of future failure.
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NEW ROOMMATE UNLOCKED!! Me and my currently staying roommate have found our third musketeer🤗 She's very laid back and love music and weird niche workshops like making soap (i believe it's for fun but I'm not certain). We're hoping she's ready to play family with us, and that we'll become a safe place for relaxing and charging the social battery.
My old roommate is being a bitch tho. We're arguing about the money she's getting back because she believes she gets more money back from gas, electrical and water. That's not true, and she's being real bitchy about how it has to be true because she did the math. I finally snapped and told her why it wasn't true, and that if she didn't understand this simple math, she should be asking someone to clear it up for her. Gtfo...
Also, because this is her last month, she's been living the full life in our apartment. Because I'm not around that much, she can do whatever she wants, like leaving the old, wooden chairs on the balcony in the rain, or the pillows... She even use a tablecloth as a beach towel, and brought the beach back in the bathroom. We don't have a vacuum. There's sand everywhere.
I'm ranting, but I'm definitely gonna call her out on it. Her own responsibility. Diva-mode activated!! I'll let you know how it goes...
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IT'S FRIDAYYY!!! Rebecca Black's iconic song is playing in my head, and I'm trying to get myself to work whilst thinking "It's the weekend, I deserve a break... 🤷🏼‍♀️"
I promised myself icecream tonight, if I finish my assignment for journalism. My other deadline has been moved to a later date, so that'll give me some rest.
On another note: tonight I'll be talking to potential roommates!! If anyone has a good question or some qualities that will be good to live with, let me know!! I've only had sucky roommates before this, but that means I'm bad at picking them, so all help is welcome.
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Reminder: Even after an insane day, good things will happen!! If it's in the form of an event from your study-association, a good meal with your family or a relaxing evening filled with reading or games.
Every day is a balance between fun and dry stuff. Make sure you get at least a little bit of both ❤️
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So after starting this day with the biggest sense of doom, I've come to tell you, I did not make it.
Because part of our assignment was a group project, and my group is the most prepared collection of people ever, they did the deadline group assignment yesterday (without me) and we had a meeting 90 minutes before the deadline about the seminar AFTER the deadline.
I cancelled my hangout with a friend to work on the seminar and my missed deadline, and I still haven't finished it all.
I'm shaking from my caffeine-intake and lack off sleep, so I'm going to lie down for 15 minutes. After that, I'll be back at it again with the assignment. But tonight I'm organizing a zoom game night for my study-association, so I'll look forward to that.
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Day 1 (morning)
So we’re starting off great, since this morning I have an insane deadline, and I slept in. Very happy with this approach, 10/10 would do again. NOT. I have 2-and-a-half hours to fix this. If I do, I’m a god.
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As you can see, I have no excuses left for my workplace. It is not an aesthetic, it is just a practical desk where I need to get shit done. I love pretty things, and I firmly believe in romanticizing your life, but this is my workspace and it needs to be functional.
If anyone has tips for a good working space, please hit me up!! And if you have troubles with your own space, please share. I am no Master Oogway, but I can certainly share some wisdom ;)
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Just wanted to show off how we're starting this process. I always let my desk get cluttered and when I finally get to the point of actually wanting to get started, I have to clean up my mess. Or put it somewhere else (aka my bed) to later put it back in the same spot.
I love getting a clean and aesthetically pleasing space, but cleaning up is in my case often also a form of procrastinating. Thus, I'll clean this up for once and for all.
No excuses!! I'm doing this now!!
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Starting point
I have tried time and time again to get myself to work,but I keep on procrastinating... I think I'm not the only one who hasn't gotten the hang of it, but nobody comes out and says it.
This study-related account is going to give me a reason to complete my tasks, and I encourage my followers (if I ever get some) to join my struggles. Send me your evidence of a succesfull day!! Send me conpleted schedules, pictures of your cluttered or aesthetic-cleaned up desk. Send me struggles you face, or things that have helped you.
I love self-help books, but I only read them when preparing myself for a study-session, inevitably postponing that session and feel bad about not getting things done (again...). So I will make sure not to fall into that trap this time, and try to motivate myself to do better.
I'll start off strong and post tonight. Or tomorrow.. I have to finish this fanfic I'm reading first, then I'll get focused....
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