myblackwolfs

[myblackwolfs]

"Absolutely no one comes to save us but us."

Ismatu Gwendolyn, "you've been traumatized into hating reading (and it makes you easier to oppress)", from Threadings, on Substack [ID'd]

[myblackwolfs]

Anyway here’s a poem I wrote about my cat

After “Do not stand at my grave and weep”, author disputed:

Do not stand at your bowl and meow. I gave you food. It’s in there now. I feed you at the dawning light, I feed you at the fall of night. I feed you kibbles mixed with meat And wet food for a special treat. I feed you even though you scoff At all the food within your trough. I feed you and still yet you yell Like as a beast from deepest hell. Do not stand at your bowl and cry. I gave you food. You will not die.

[myblackwolfs]

It's poll time again. There can be only one.

[myblackwolfs]

[myblackwolfs]

no grave can hold my body down, i'll crawl home to her.

simon really meant it, every bit of it, he’d come back to you somehow. he would find his way back to you. wether it was walking through the front door quietly not to wake you up in the middle of the night or cold in a coffin. he’d rather have you hold his dead body than not to have you touch his skin ever again.

that’s what simon was thinking about as his ear ringed so loud he couldn’t focus on his surroundings. he looked up at the sky, so blue it almost didn’t feel right. why so blue when so much blood was being shed?

he occasionally would feel the ground he was laying on tremble, maybe a hand grenade, maybe a body falling next to his. the smell of gunpowder filled his covered nostrils and he could feel his lungs collapsing on themselves from the thickness of the air he was breathing. his eyes weren’t doing good either, filled with dust and sand from the dry earth.

it took him a few more seconds to focus his eyes on something, something that possibly wasn’t moving, his head spinning each time he tried to sit up. something was weighting on his legs, holding him down. he struggled to raise his torso and groaned at the sight of a large body blocking him. he let himself fall back down.

he was ready to go, a sharp pain to his side telling him he wouldn’t last long alone. he’d been through worse, way worse, the scar provided by the meat hook was proof of that, but something was telling him this was as bad. he was ready to go.

the only thing he could think about in his last moments was you. he thought he could see glimpses of you, maybe your hair in the corner of his eyes or he’d hear your laugh as another fire shooting started. his eyes searched for you frantically. he wanted to tell you to leave immediately, scream it at the top of his lungs, but his voice was caught in his throat and you weren’t really there. his mind just playing cruel tricks on him.

your name was repeated like a mantra in his head, repeating it so many times it almost lost a meaning. almost. a prayer, a chant. he sure needed to pray, for you.

he had been shelving the thought that tormented him for months. he wanted to go and confess his sins, he almost felt the need, his palms itching with haste anytime he thought about it. years had passed since the last time he had set foot in a church, so many that he had almost forgotten the reason for the visit. the ghosts of the past never abandon you, especially if they are people you love, especially if they are family, the innocent. its always the innocent who pay the highest price.

‘i wonder what she’s doing now, who’s gonna knock on her door and tell her im gone.’ he thought. ‘hopefully price. he’s the one with tact and the most considerate. he’ll help her when i’m gone, keep an eye on her.’

the sweet smell of your hair replaced for a moment the one of blood and gunpowder, your laughter still echoing in his ears. he pictured your sweet face and big innocent eyes looking up at him.

“promise me something?”

“mhm?” he hummed, surprised you were still up. his hand hadn’t stopped caressing your hair since you laid down on his chest, your hand resting on his collarbone as your ear listened to his calm heartbeat. “yeah, anything.”

“promise me you’ll always come back.” you whispered in the dark room. “promise me, simon.”

he nodded, taken aback by your request. you weren’t the fondest of his job, he knew it, he hated to concern you like he did.

“yes.”

“promise.” you urged. “please.”

he bent his head down and kissed the top of yours, his arm sliding down your back and drawing you closer by your waist. “i will, love. i’ll always come back to you.”

you sighed, the knot of thoughts in your worried head began to untie. “mh.”

“better now?” he softly asked. his voice was hoarse from his constant shouting orders at the obstreperous recruits. you gave a short nod. “i mean it.”

he groaned as he managed to get the body off of himself, struggling to get on his knees.

fucks sake, he couldn’t let you live with him gone like this. it was selfish of him to leave you in such an abrupt way, really. he tried to push away the image of you opening the door to find price with a carton box filled with simons stuff from the barracks with the balaclava and skull mask on top and your knees hitting the floor before he could even say anything.

his legs didn’t feel like they could hold his weight up, he immediately fell to his knees as he heard another rapid fire too near him for his liking. his gun was long gone, he had to manage to survive alone, again.

“crawlin’ it is.” he breathed as he started to drag his tired body with the strength of his arms alone. you had always praised his strength: he could lift you with one arm alone, you loved to be held and hold on to his arm anywhere and at anytime. that was the main reason he always pushed for more while training, and the motivation your sweet compliments always gave him now were gonna save his life. he made a mental note to kiss and hold you a little longer and tighter if he ever made it home alive.

he could see the building his team was supposed to meet up in case things got bad. it looked so far away that it was alarmingly close. maybe it was just his messed up vision, a mirage, but he could swear he saw you from a window looking at him, urgently motioning him to come.

he brought the thick balaclava above his nose so he could breathe better and as enemy gunfire continued to flow, he kept his head low as he moved dead bodies from his way.

he could hear your voice calling for him and he wanted to call you for you back, but the noises of the battlefield were hurrying him to get to the safe zone first.

he stumbled by the door as he brought himself up, one hand stabilizing him as he held on to the doorframe as the other went to press on his wound.

“lt!” johnnys voice called before he rushed to help him. “ye cheeky bastard, i told them not to leave yet, to wait for ye.”

“gaz saw you get shot.” price swung simon’s arm over his shoulder in order to help him to the nearest table, where he laid down.

“he saw that right.” simon bit the inside of his cheek as price inspected his wound, pressing on it. “is he a‘ight?”

“he’s fine, hit his head but had his helmet on, he’s getting checked out by the medics.” price informed him as simon winced at the sharp pain. “there’s at least two bullets in here, didn’t pass through, stuck.”

“just take ‘em the fuck out.” simon groaned. “how’s it lookin’?”

“you’ll live.” price patted his shoulder in comfort before he went to call a medic.

“we really thought we’d lost ye there, lt.” johnny’s face was glowing with sweat and blood, the black war paint smudged messily all around his face and his mohawk dusted.

“helicopter’s leaving in thirty, boys!” price’s baritone voice called from the other room.

simon scoffed, sighing and closing his eyes, finally letting himself relax as your figure started to fade from the corner of the room where it’d been standing, silently looking at him. “won’t lose me, can’t wait to go home, johnny.”

[myblackwolfs]

Born for Greatness

John Price x f!reader - As a liaison, your job is often interesting. Your newest job is to help a PMC pack, the 141, to prevent any further Incidents. But there's something about this pack that is different from others you've worked with...

Chapter one | two | three | four | five | six | seven | eight | bonus chapters one | two | three | four

[myblackwolfs]

Born for Greatness bonus 3

Okay I ended up adding a chapter because this is a gift for a friend

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It's that time of the month and the cramps are awful. The pack fusses.

Warnings: Lil bit of panic from the boys, emotional whiplash, emotional instability, cramping, Feelings.

Word count: 1.6k

John was the first to find you curled up on the couch, hugging a heat pad to your abdomen, face twisted in pain. 

“Love?” He crouched in front of you, hands on your knees, trying to make eye contact. “What’s wrong?” 

“Just cramps,” you grit out, trying to breathe slowly. They were bad this month, worse than normal. Much worse. 

Some of his concern cleared, and he lifted one hand to brush your forehead. “Had any painkillers?” 

“An hour ago.” You closed your eyes at the tiny bit of relief he brought just by being there. 

“Not helping?” He murmured sympathetically. 

“Not yet.” You clenched your jaw tight and stopped breathing at another sharp ripple of pain. 

“Here, move forward a bit, love.” John stood and circled around behind you, gently nudging you forward until he had free access to your lower back. He started massaging slowly, taking his time. Just the pressure of those big warm hands on your skin helped, the cramps easing in their intensity. 

“What’s going on?” Gaz asked sharply, more intense than usual. “Who’s hurt?” 

You jumped at the unexpected intrusion and then hissed softly. Oh ouch. 

“At ease,” John grumbled, hands briefly detouring to squeeze your shoulders. “Alright, love?”

“Good enough,” you muttered. “It’s fine, it’ll pass.” 

“Not soon enough.” John huffed softly and resumed massaging your back. 

Gaz put things together quickly, because he was smart. He also dropped down in front of you, frowning with concern. “Want some tea?” 

You smiled, small and tight, trying to hide your pain again. Despite the fact that you knew it was far too late for that. “Only if it’s no trouble.” 

“Not for you.” He stood again and started working on tea. (You’d known getting an electric kettle for the pack room was a good idea, and mentally congratulated past-you.) 

You breathed out slowly, the cramps lessening as John continued massaging your lower back and hips. “Not that I want you to leave,” you started slowly, pausing to grimace at another clench of pain, “but don’t you have to go do Captain-y things?” 

John huffed softly in amusement, leaning down to press a kiss to the top of your head. “I’ll worry about it later,” he rumbled. “Don’t fret, love.”

“Don’t fret, he says to the person whose job it is to fret,” you muttered, grinning to yourself when you saw Gaz’s shoulders jump with a stifled laugh. 

“Here.” Gaz held out the tea to you, hovering even after you’d taken it. Clearly he was unwilling to leave just yet. 

“Thanks.” You took a sip. Perfect. 

“Cap?” Soap called from down the hall, footsteps approaching fast. 

“In here,” John said, speaking normally. “Everything’s fine.” 

About three seconds later, Soap stopped next to the couch, looking between the three of you. He blinked and then muttered a little “oh”. 

“Soap,” you started before he could say anything. “I love you but if you say anything I might deck you.”

“Rog.” He grinned, opting instead to plop down next to you and cuddle into your side. You relaxed a little, the heat of him and John and the heat pack all working to ease the cramps to something more manageable. 

Relief had you going near-limp, leaning back (and not even apologizing as you trapped John’s hands) with a little sigh. “Finally,” you grumbled, eyes sliding closed. 

“Hungry, love?” John didn’t try to free himself yet, just moved a bit to be more comfortable. 

You made a face, shaking your head. “Definitely not.” 

John hummed acknowledgement, glancing down at where Soap was still cuddled up against you. “Gonna take it easy today?” 

“I think if I try anything otherwise, I won’t get very far,” you admitted with a sigh. 

“Good.” He pressed another kiss to the top of your head before he pulled his arms free. “Sure you don’t want anything?”

“I’m sure.” You tipped your head back further to smile at him. “That helped.” 

John nodded once, though you could see he was thinking about something. His gaze went from you to Soap to Gaz (still hovering by the minifridge) back to you.

You decided to save him the trouble. “Yes, I know you have to work. Yes, one of them can stay with me. No, I have no preference which. No, I will not shout at anyone.” You paused. “Probably.” You paused again. “At least I will do my very best not to.” 

John looked very briefly chagrined but then smoothed out his expression and nodded. “Good,” he murmured. “I’ll check in for lunch, how’s that?” 

“That’s fine,” you agreed, ignoring the looks Soap and Gaz sent each other. “No setting your paperwork on fire.”

John heaved the biggest sigh known to man and turned around, but not before you saw his lips twitch in a grin. “That was once,” he grumbled on his way out. 

“Drink your tea,” Gaz said, making his way over to the two of you. “Gotta go deal with recruits.”

“Don’t scare them too much,” you joked, grinning up at him. 

He rolled his eyes but still leaned down to rub his cheek against the top of your head. And ruffle Soap’s mohawk playfully, dodging out of the way and leaving with a cackle while Soap swore at him. 

“Movie time?” Soap asked after he’d settled back down again, having somehow managed to contort himself so he was half-curled around you. 

“Mmhm.” You picked up the remote, flipping through options. 

You two managed a fairly peaceful couple hours. Soap got a little antsy, which didn’t surprise you. He wasn’t used to being inactive, especially first thing. 

“You can go for a run,” you murmured to him after you finished the first movie. “I’ll be fine.” 

He shook his head a little. “‘S fine,” he murmured, even as he fidgeted. 

“Seriously. Go.” You nudged him. “I think I’m gonna go get a book, anyway.” 

He wavered until you stood, leaving your now-cool heat pack on the couch. “Ye sure?”

“I’m sure,” you said, flapping your hands in a shooing motion. “Go. Get some energy out.” 

He nodded and left, and you hummed as you went back to your room to retrieve your book and your meds. Because you were definitely not skipping a dose today. 

The couple hours of quiet reading time to yourself helped, as did more meds. As promised, John brought lunch to you, and the two of you had a quiet meal. 

You tried very hard to tamp down your fraying temper. You even managed it.

Until the afternoon. 

You breathed in deep, pain once again battering you, temper entirely too short, energy levels too low to do something like climb up on the roof. 

“Gaz,” you started, closing your eyes. “You do not need to hover.” 

He paused, in the middle of hovering. And took a step back. “Sorry.”

“It’s fine.” You grimaced when that came out too short. “It’s not you, I’m just…” You trailed off, not sure how to put it into words. The general discomfort, the pain, the short temper because of everything else. 

“Got it.” To his credit, Gaz just nodded once, stepping away to flip on the kettle again before pulling out his phone. You sighed softly, frustrated with yourself on top of everything else now. 

But Gaz didn’t seem to be upset. He brought you tea a few minutes later, checked his phone one more time, nodded to himself, and smiled at you. “One of us’ll bring you dinner, yeah? Text if you need anything.” 

And then he left quietly. 

You were so relieved you could almost cry, and so disgusted with yourself for being so relieved that you did cry, just a little bit. You were a terrible person. 

But you had silence and the pack room to yourself for a little while. Which was great, up until it wasn’t. You ended up hunched over yourself, feeling terrible, trying to push the heat pack into your skin until it almost burned. 

A soft chuff pulled your head up and you squinted at the cheetah in front of you. “Ghost? You need something?” 

He chuffed again and nudged your arm with his nose. When you just blinked at him, confused, he chuffed a third time and shoved his head under your chest, physically pushing you. You let him and eventually got the hint, laying flat on the couch. 

He promptly hopped up and draped himself across you. His purr rumbled pleasantly against your skin, the vibration far more soothing for your cramps than you would have guessed. Within minutes, you were completely relaxed under him, moving only to push a pillow under your head. He continued purring, louder now. 

You didn’t stand a chance against that. 

You woke slowly, groggy and disoriented, to John leaning over you with a little smile. “How’re you feelin’, love?” He kept his voice quiet. 

You blinked a few times. “Groggy,” you muttered. “Better. Doesn’t hurt.” You started to stretch and quickly realized you couldn’t, because you still had a cheetah on you. 

“You want dinner?” 

You made a face. “Not hungry,” you grumbled, wiggling one hand free to scratch through Ghost’s little ruff of fur. His purring got louder, which you hadn’t thought possible. 

“Alright.” John leaned down enough to kiss you, soft and sweet, before he turned the TV on low, settling next to you. You hummed softly, content, your fingers curling lazily in Ghost’s fur.

You had no idea when you fell asleep, but you woke up to John snoring softly, leaned back on the couch with his hat over his face and Ghost still laying on you as a cheetah. A quick look showed Gaz and Soap, both shifted, laying near John’s feet. 

You smiled and closed your eyes again. Couldn’t hurt to get a little more sleep.

[myblackwolfs]

Born for Greatness bonus 2

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One of the more common requests was for some of the courting between Price and momma bear! So, here we have some of their courting. Just bits and pieces. I hope you enjoy! 💖

Warnings: Swearing, kissing, shifter behavior, world building. 

Word count: 1.4k

It no longer surprised you when the pack sought you out to eat with you (or dragged you away from whatever you were doing to make you eat). It didn’t even surprise you that John sometimes shooed the others off and got the two of you a spot to yourselves, or that he sometimes brought food for the two of you to his office. 

And then he pulled out all the stops and did something like this.

“What’s all this?” You blinked at the pack room, the table actually set with a tablecloth and plates. 

“Dinner.” John’s voice was dry but he couldn’t keep the humor out of his eyes, even as he pulled out a chair for you. 

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[myblackwolfs]

Born for Greatness: Bonus 1

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Okay here is the first bonus chapter! No reader here, not really. Just Price and Logan. 

Warnings: Swearing, shifter behavior, world building. 

Word count: 1k

Logan tucked his hands into his pockets as he surveyed the alpha before him. Captain John Price. He was clearly respected by his pack - even Logan’s kid liked him. At least, from what Logan had seen. 

“Is this the part where you ask after my intentions?” Price sounded faintly amused, though there was still a bit of tension in his shoulders. 

“Nah. Kid’s old enough to make her own decisions. ‘Sides, she out-stubborns me.” Logan smirked. If nothing else, that would be entertaining. For him. 

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[myblackwolfs]

Born for Greatness 8

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Well here we are! This is the last official chapter of the story. I do have one short bonus chapter written that is Price and Logan, and I’m open to doing more! I may try to revisit this pack again. If you have ideas/requests, feel free to let me know!

In which we finally get answers. All of us. 

Warnings: Swearing, fluff, pack cuddles, the boys are too cute, brief mention of drugs (from last chapter), I finally get to make the joke

John Price x f!reader

Word count: 3.1k

Four days after the forced shift incident, you had been gently but firmly shooed out of the investigation. Which was fine by you - you were not an investigator. You’d handed everything over to John and wiped your hands clean of the mess. 

But it had put some things into perspective for you. 

“Finally made up your mind?” Logan dropped down next to you, leaning back to join you laying on the grass.

“Mmhm.” You smiled up at the sky, oddly peaceful despite the butterflies in your tummy. 

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[myblackwolfs]

Born for Greatness 7

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Y’all ready for an emotional ride? Hee hee hee

Warnings: Emotional talks, talk of history, mention of past neglect, minor chemical warfare (forcing a shift), swearing, pack cuddles. 

John Price x f!reader

Word count: 2.9k

It took long moments for you to actually remember to drop your gaze, your thoughts reduced to white noise. Panic was rising now, faster than you could deal with. 

“Logan–” You turned to yell at your friend, but he was gone. “Fucking–” At least you were finally able to scramble out of the pond, though you were shivering. 

“Alright there?” John was walking towards you, slowly but surely. Making sure you could see him coming. 

“Yeah, fine.” You wrung some water out of your shirt, jaw clenched so your teeth didn’t chatter. Sunlight helped but not enough. You needed to warm up and dry off. 

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[myblackwolfs]

Born for Greatness 6

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You may have noticed this is now chapter 6 of 9! There are 8 official chapters and then there will be one bonus chapter with the 141 pack and Logan interacting.

This chapter, you have a very hard time. But not everything is bad.

Warnings: Swearing, attachment issues, John Price is his own warning, more world building and shifter behavior, pack cuddles definitely need their own warning. Discussion of reader’s past and issues. Bodily throwing reader into a cold pond.

John Price x f!reader

Word count: 2.5k

Something shifted after that movie night. Suddenly, Price was everywhere - checking up on you, watching you while he worked with rookies, ensuring you ate. 

And as much as Logan liked to tease you that you were wilfully blind, you knew what this kind of behavior meant, especially coming from him. 

He was treating you as pack. 

You weren’t sure what surprised you more - the treatment, or the lack of protest from Logan. Logan did watch Price any time they were in the same room, but he was being oddly calm about everything. 

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[myblackwolfs]

Born for Greatness 5

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In which Logan makes his grand entrance (and there is a lot less bloodshed than most of you seem prepped for). Some discussions are had. 

Side note: JTF2 is a Canadian special forces unit. Also, I’m thinking of writing a side chapter that is just Logan and the 141 pack. Thoughts? 

Warnings: Swearing, Logan is a jerk, Price needs a warning label, world building, shifter behavior, pack cuddles. 

Word count: 2.2k

Eventual John Price x f!reader

The plane landed back in England and you leaned back a bit, watching the pack. Soap was glued to one side of you, Gaz napping on your other side. Price was watching all three of you, something undeniably soft in his gaze. 

You hadn’t forgotten about Logan, but you hadn’t expected him to find you so bloody fast. 

You got to put your things down in your room, at least, before Price was knocking on your door, expression thunderous. 

“Who did you tell about this base?” He asked in a low snarl. 

“No one,” you snapped, frowning. “Signed too damn many NDAs to tell anyone." 

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[myblackwolfs]

Born for Greatness 4

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In which pack cuddles are a thing, we learn more about the local pack, and there is only a little bit of freaking out. Also you continue to earn your place as pack mom.

Thank you to @gallowsjoker​ for helping with the nicknames! 

Warnings: Reader has Issues, swearing, internal panic, bits of German, background Horangi/König.

Word count: 2.7k

Eventual John Price x f!reader

Also if you recognize that character… Hee hee hee 😈

Being alone had stopped actively bothering you a long time ago. You’d spent a lot of time alone.

Even being alone on base wasn’t that bad. You read and responded to emails and chatted with some old friends and kept an eye on some shipments. You didn’t give yourself time to get bored. 

But it was still a long four days until the pack got back. You knew better than to ask where they’d been or what they’d been doing. You just eyed them all, noting the blood stains and mud. 

“Any injuries?” you asked Price, handing Gaz a snack. He looked like he needed it. Actually, so did Soap, so you gave him one too. 

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[myblackwolfs]

Born for Greatness 3

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The aftermath of being attacked, and some familiar faces from a previous assignment. 

AKA I couldn’t resist sneaking a couple more people into this fic. :D 

Warnings: Swearing, mild possessive behavior, mention of bruises and head injury, more world building. 

Eventual John Price x f!reader

Word count: 2.8k

By the time Gaz knocked on your door, you were ready. Still sore as hell, but ready.

“Morning,” you murmured, picking up both bags.

“You alright?” Gaz looked you over quickly. “Didn’t see you at dinner.”

“I was nauseous,” you told him truthfully. “Didn’t want to risk it. I’m fine, sleep helped.” Sleep had also helped the bruises form, but. You weren’t going to tell him that. 

“Still.” His jaw clenched for a moment. “You’re a guest and you were injured.”

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[myblackwolfs]

Born for Greatness 2

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For those of you who liked the world building: Good news! We’ve got lots of it this time. Plus we get to see Soap and Gaz’s shifted forms. 

Warnings: Brief violence, anti-shifter rhetoric, non-graphic injuries, non-graphic violence, swearing. 

Word count: 3k

It took a few days to get the scheduling pinned down, but you managed it. You also watched every time the pack worked or trained with the soldiers, keeping an eye out for any other malcontents. Fortunately, you seemed to only have a handful of those to deal with. You got the requisition forms sent in. 

And then you defaulted to the normal etiquette, which you’d had to teach dozens of times already. 

“There are really only a few rules you’ll need to remember,” you told the first group. “Don’t worry, I’m not going to teach you the history of the world part one.” A few of them laughed at that, and you grinned. “Okay. First thing to remember: staring them in the eyes is a challenge. You do not want to do that. Pick another point on their face - forehead or nose, or even chin. Shows you’re paying attention without accidentally challenging anyone.” 

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[myblackwolfs]

Born for Greatness 1

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Here we are with chapter one! We will find out eventually what each of the guys shifts into. There will be more characters introduced later. This is a semi-slow burn, so don’t expect anything romantic for the first few chapters.

Warnings: Some violence, swearing, anti-shifter rhetoric (brief).

Word count: 3k

You tugged your shirt straight again, taking a deep breath. You’d been assured that the pack would meet you at the base, but you were going in on your own. 

Wasn’t the first time you were being sent into the metaphorical lion’s den, and probably wouldn’t be the last. 

The car stopped and the driver turned to look at you. “Here we are, ma’am.”

“Thank you.” You offered the soldier a smile, hiding your nerves, and got out of the car. The driver had already grabbed your duffel for you, and you nodded your thanks to him. 

Once more unto the breach. Your lips twitched at your own sense of humor. 

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