Sometimes
I get so high
off the prospect
of changing
that I forget
to actually change
n.j.b.
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I never really loved her
you say reassuringly
and all the envious parts of me
melt to honey
but then
I imagine you draped across
your next girl
telling her how she is so much more
and how you never really
loved me
n.j.b.
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my motherland is
fragments
of different countries
n.j.b.
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This morning
I was lucky enough
to be woken up
by two kisses -
one from you
and one from
the sun
TWO KISSES by n.j.b.
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You silently
pulled storms
out of me
like the moon
coaxing the sea
- n.j.b.
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I’ve always had
a chameleon soul
revealing or concealing
different parts of myself
depending on my audience
but i showed you every facet
and you love me whole
n.j.b.
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Give me a man
who is not so concerned
with being a man
Give me a man
who is not just
a hard thing
with rigid limbs
Give me a man
who weeps
n.j.b.
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The words collect in my mouth
like rain drops commanding a hurricane
and suddenly it feels as if the galaxy is laying
like a tablet on the tip of my tongue
still i stay silent by n.j.b.
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I waited and waited
for the day
that I would finally
be saved
Waited and waited
for the day
that they would finally notice
the smile
that had abandoned my lips
the melancholy
that moulded my eye bags
Or the blood curdling scream
that hid in my quietness
but it never came
I waited
holding onto the darkness
for dear life
I waited
holding onto the darkness
so tightly
my palms turn black and blue
I waited
until I could not wait any longer
and then I waited
some more
I waited and waited and waited
Until one day
I finally stopped waiting
and gave my own damn self
permission
to heal
Permission To Heal by n.j.b.
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Why are you waiting
for a phantom puzzle piece
when you are already
complete?
n.j.b.
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