ohwickedsoul

[ohwickedsoul]

this is the funniest thing I’ve read in my LIFE

[ohwickedsoul]

fun fact: Boston Museum of Science calls their evening lecture series “SubSpace”, which would be a totally innocuous math term except for the fact that, to make sure you know these lectures are higher-level and not aimed at their usual audience (kids), they chose to subtitle it “SubSpace: Adult Experiences”

😶

[ohwickedsoul]

😳

[ohwickedsoul]

my friend told me this story about going to italy, getting hopelessly lost and accidentally stumbling upon some guys absolutely Guzzling beer on a bench near some type of ancient ruin and talking to each other in a mixture of ukrainian and russian, so she goes to them to ask for directions and one of them after being interrupted by the other dude holds up his finger, shushes him and goes "Циц. коли соловей співає...даже ішак мовчить." (when the nightingale sings.. even the donkey is silent).

This is NOT any common idiom. he just spoke from his heart. i think about him

[ohwickedsoul]

ill spend my twenties investigating the healing properties of salt i dont know about you guys

[ohwickedsoul]

[ohwickedsoul]

Oh she thinks she’s the plusherrrrr

[ohwickedsoul]

a five year old had my phone & this is what he searched

[ohwickedsoul]

Thinking of the larger context of LOTR and like, the fellowship swapping old war stories and shit and Sam just says “Yeah I killed a huge spider…Shelob, I think?”

And Gandalf just blinks and is like, “You what now?”

“Yeah, killed it. Had to save Frodo”

Gandalf elects not to tell Sam that he killed the spawn of a primordial demon.

[ohwickedsoul]

cats don't even unstick their claws out of things anymore they will just sit there with their claw stuck in a blanket and look at you like this until you unstick it for them

[ohwickedsoul]

literally any upper middle class tiktok self-identified ‘that girl’ in a pastel workout set with a thirteen step skincare routine and a green juice is a million times closer to being patrick bateman irl than any self-identified sigma film bro

[ohwickedsoul]

[ohwickedsoul]

the self care industry will sell you face masks and teas and whatnot so i'm here to remind you not to forget the most important self care activity which is masturbation

[ohwickedsoul]

[ohwickedsoul]

[guy who likes to help everyone always but is also suicidal and some sort of pervert voice] no yeah you can drink my blood. It’s fine

[ohwickedsoul]

leitmotifs never get old to me like holy shit dude there’s this melody that corresponds to this one guy and if you hear the melody it means the guy is there. holy shit. and sometimes it refers to ideas too not just guys. has anyone heard about this

[ohwickedsoul]

House of wolves - mcr