orokay

[orokay]

my rats have mites

#taking them to the vet tomorrow AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #if you want to donate to the new bedding and toy and vet fund https://ko-fi.com/A6242KZ lol #luckily i think i caught it early im hoping i can wipe it out before it becomes an infestation #dl #not art

[orokay]

best standalone pen computer/tablet for drawing on the go (ie. ipad pro, huion studio, etc)?

#don't have the money rn but for the future #i want something i can take with me out of the house or for when im working that doesn't need to be connected to a computer #thanks!!!!! #dl #not art #posted this and was wondering why i didn't get any replies and then realized i'd posted it on my reblog blog by accident

[orokay]

[orokay]

I know it's silly for this to really only be hitting me now at almost 26 but man no one really talks about what a demoralizing nightmare it is to be a person without a 'dream' (tw suicidal ideation, self harm, negative talk, honestly this is just a huge vent don't worry about it I have therapy later and im on my period and this got away from me a bit lol)

I know I started feeling it in little ways since I was a kid because I distinctly remember being asked in elementary school what I wanted to be when I grew up for an activity and just saying 'nurse' because it's what my best friend at the time wanted to be. Then for a long time it was volcanologist even though I literally never really expected that to be possible for me. I started really feeling it when I had to choose for a class in high school where we spent the semester researching a job we wanted to go to school for and planning out what schools we'd apply to for it, etc etc. I had no plans & no idea of what I wanted. I have no idea why but I just arbitrarily chose archivist. When it came time to apply for college, it wasn't a huge deal because I was starting off at community college, but I thought for sure I wanted to do forensic anthropology. Obviously my community college didn't have that as an option so now I have a 90% finished associates in social sciences. The whole million years I've been working on that degree I've bounced around considering animal sciences or conservation or radiology or mortuary school or this or that as I worked different jobs and figured out what I liked doing, what I was interested in, and what I wasn't. I've thought about accounting just to have a good paying job but I know myself and I can't go through school for something that I have no interest in even if that degree would get me out of my parents house. I'm already almost always feeling on the verge of suicide.

And this year. With OVR I was sat down and told. Tell me what you want to do and make it realistic. We can help you with school but we can only give you $3000 for it and you can only have that if you're doing school full time. We can help you get a job but without a degree we can't get you a good paying job. You need a degree. You need to choose. Tell us what you want.

I thought I wanted this training opportunity and I do. I felt amazing for a while after starting it but there's a part of me that's looking ahead at the end and seeing the same pit I've been hanging over for years and realizing this has been my whole life and I just hadn't known it yet. I hate call center work. I need a job that makes me feel fulfilled but I've given up on feeling like it's an option. Part of this training is work readiness training and again they're asking me what do I want. I need to choose. Tell us what you want so we can help you get it.

I don't want work. I want work, but not like this. I want to be happy. I want to have money to survive. I want my parents to be here forever. I want to spend time with my friends and draw my characters. I want someone to love me and I want so badly to love them back. I don't want to lose my insurance because I want to keep taking my meds. I want to stop cutting. I can't keep living like this. This can't be forever.

#i just. every time i think THIS IS IT. im fixed now #i very quickly hit that 'this can't be forever' wall #and every time that wall is closer and i hit it harder and it takes me longer to recover #i feel like at this point my state of being is just anger and sadness and this stupid self destructive optimism #that keeps my hopes way up high so i have so much farther to fall when the disappointment hits #im also on my period so maybe this is all just hormones and i should chill out #dl #not art #vent

[orokay]

February started with false hopes of a ceasefire.

It is now February 15 and the largest medical facility in South Gaza, which sheltered ~2,500 people and had been under siege for two weeks, has been attacked. It is now completely out of function.

We are 21 days away from marking 5 months of ongoing genocide.

Here are several posts with numerous donation links & other ways to help. I’ll also include the tag I use for those posts, where you’ll find individual gofundme’s listed as well. There is also Operation Olive Branch, which has an excel sheet of numerous families in Gaza & how to donate to them + how to contact them. If you can afford it, please consider donating and please, please remember to scroll down to donate to families at the bottom of the list. If you cannot give, please simply share as many resources as you find.

[orokay]

Hey guys! I broke my tablet big time today. I ordered a new one right away so I'll be able to keep working on commissions asap, but it's on a payment plan and the next payment is right before I get my first paycheck at my new job! I've opened 15 more slots of these to help with that, so if they look appealing please consider buying one, I'd really appreciate it! Naturally, I won't be able to start on them until the new tablet comes in, but I'll keep you guys posted and make a post here as soon as it's shipped & I know the eta.

Link to order here and and a link to the gallery so see examples here.

I'm open to doing hairstyle variations (ex. here) for an additional $5. Any other ideas (expression, accessory, etc. variations) are also available w/o charge depending on complexity or amount (ex. one alt expression would be free if it just effects the mouth, but more than one alt or if the expression would alter the whole face such as going from a smile to a rage expression would have an additional $5 charge). I'm super flexible with these so if you have an idea email me or send a message over ko-fi and we can discuss it! Here are some examples of variations I've done before: x x x x x

#i have two more i need to work on rn but I'm planning on finishing them after my doctor's appointment since im still sick sob emoji #dl

[orokay]

This might be a stupid question, but how would one go about getting swatches from their bg3 character if they were to commission you for a mini-bust? Please and thank you! I'm just having a hard time figuring out how to get the colours

Not a stupid question at all! I mainly require swatches because I don't want to accidentally completely mess up the tone someone is looking for & screenshots can be difficult to color pick from because of lighting.

I'd suggest looking up skin/hair/eye swatches or picking something that looks right with a hex code picker and send me the code (ex. #e74826). It doesn't have to be perfect & you can totally tell me to adjust it a bit as I see fit. It just helps me a ton to know what you see when you imagine or look at your character. For that reason, it also helps to get a simple description of their colors (ie. character is a drow and has medium gray skin with a purple-ish undertone. Deep red eyes. And hair that is white with a warm, almost blonde undertone). All of these things together work really well to help me see your character through your eyes.

#answered asks

[orokay]

My (hopefully) last batch of large ko-fis for a while!

I had an interview for the paid training opportunity through ovr on Thursday so I'm waiting to hear back from them to know for sure, but regardless of if I get it or not, I'm going to be taking a much needed break from larger ko-fis to recuperate and draw for myself. In the meantime I'm going to keep mini's open, so if you're interested in supporting me until I (fingers crossed) start this new job in February, please check out my commissions page on ko-fi! I’m currently unemployed! If you’d like to help me out you can buy a mini or donate to my ko-fi! Thank you so much for all of your support!🌺

I don't want this to turn into a novel, so I'll try keep this brief, but I want to thank you guys from the bottom of my heart for supporting me through this period of my life. It's been a really rocky road, but I don't know where I'd be without the generous support of all of you guys who commissioned me, donated, and boosted my posts. Thank you so so so so so much! I want to send a special, huge thank you to Jax who commissioned me almost every time I opened them. I can't tell you how happy I was every time you popped up in my emails. You've been a dream commissioner to work with I honestly don't have the words to express how much working with you meant to me! Thank you again! I hope I'll be able to draw more of your characters for you in the future! ♥

#post did end up getting really long WOOPS under the readmore it goes #im feeling really sappy today i wish i was better at putting these feelings into words tho lol #my art #finished commissions

[orokay]

i'm seeing people losing hope for palestine i'm begging you seriously please don't. the death toll is high but there are still people alive, there are still journalists risking everything to make sure the world sees what is happening. please continue protesting if you have the option to, keep demanding for a ceasefire and keep talking about palestinians both alive and dead. you have to keep going until the very end or else you really did fail them.

[orokay]

‘israel is targeting hamas’

Israeli jets have targeted the family of the head of surgery in the Indonesian Hospital, Mohammad Al Rann, killing them all.

Al Jazeera’s correspondent Wael Dahdouh’s wife, son, daughter and infant grandson killed.

Israeli warplanes have killed journalist Dua' Sharf and her child in a strike on her house in Gaza.

While she was working, doctor Sana'a Nour was informed that an Israeli airstrike killed her brother.

A Residential block is completely destroyed after being heavily bombed by Israeli warplanes in Khan Younis, southern Gaza.

A mother lost her 6 children by an Israeli air strike that bombed Jabalia refugee camp, north of Gaza.

Palestinian elderly woman stuck amidst the rubble of her house bombed by lsraeli warplanes.

"We were a family of eight, four of us were killed and the other four were injured."

this was not over days, or weeks. this was all within 24 hours.

[orokay]

It has been hard for me to talk about how what is going on with Israel and Palestine is affecting me personally, but I grew up in Gaza and most of my family still lives there. My father did not survive the bombings last week and I have not been able to contact my younger sister in days. I am try to being understanding that most people do not have personal connections to what is happening and therefore are justifying their silence, but is heartbreaking to see this misinformation being spread. What’s happening there is a genocide, not a war. It is not antisemitic to support Palestine, it’s not even antiemetic to criticise Israel. There is no grey area or neutrality regarding this, and it is so easy to find resources that will educate you on the subject. It is my people and my home being destroyed so I will never be silent about this, but I please urge everyone to get informed and start speaking up and finding ways they can help.

decolonizepalestine has tons of information on Palestine’s history/propaganda that has been spread throughout the years

UK citizens can email their MP asking for a ceasefire

US citizens can call/email their local government officials asking for a ceasefire

Jewish Voice for Peace also has many resources for ways for US citizens to get involved, including protests

Donate to Palestine Children’s Relief Fund

Donate to Medical Aid for Palestine

Donate to help get food and hygiene kits to Gaza

[orokay]

Summer Ko-fis!

I’m currently unemployed! If you’d like to help me out you can get one of these for yourself when I open them again or donate to my ko-fi! Thank you so much for all of your support!🌺

#i was so surprised the last time i posted ko-fis was the may batch like wow this summer sure just. zipped by huh #my art #finished commissions #i try to keep the sizes consistent but every batch ends up #like slowly zooming in ;w; #probably going to open two halfbody comms for $50 this month #to change things up so keep an eye out for that #until i figure that out minis are still open

[orokay]

been thinking of my friend and mine's mass effect OCs lately :3

From left to right, Bugly (belongs to me), Mallorie, Ithanna, and Shnel (all belong to Alyse @orokay)

#YEAH BABY HELL YEAH #mass effect oc #bugly #mallorie #ithanna #shnel #mass effect

[orokay]

believe it or not the turians were probably the most difficult ones to cutesify

step into my shoes. close your eyes and imagine the epic highs and lows of trying to draw a cute, chibi-style vorcha.

#i was at my bestie's house this weekend and it's always a toss up whether or not i'll be able to draw #and this time it was a solid maybe i had no ideas but i waaaas able to do this #anyway back to commissions #shnel #raska #bugly #mallorie #drusolis #caslio #ithanna #mass effect oc #my art #mass effect

[orokay]

I just hit a follower milestone so lets pretend I didn't start this weeks ago and that this redraw is in honor of that. Anyway, throwing this to the pinterest and wattpad girlies like chicken feed, I hope they love this just as much if not more than the og. This ones for you!

#courri #my art #fingers crossed this scratches the same itch as the old one i need this to be linked in fics as a reference for y/n's hair #be free

[orokay]

practicing a different style with 2 characters from @orokay and I’s original town, featuring their lovely Leon and Sybil <3 !

#yes yes yes yes YES YES YES #our babiesssssss they're so gorgeous sana ur so talented #printing these out and eating ur art as we speak #dumbarton #sybil #leon

[orokay]

I don’t have a lot of art of sybil yet but here are some doodles i’ve done between kofis

#damn this bload up while you're all here www.yahoo