phillipkwriter

[phillipkwriter]

All writers need to hear this.

-PK

#phillip k #writing #writers #ernest hemingway #quote #meme #inspiration #first draft #independent #comedy #kindle #writer #print #writing community

[phillipkwriter]

Me: Ok, I finally finished getting my certificate in Mobile Development. Now I can apply for that job at my friend’s office at 7-11.

Friend: … um yeah, about that.

-PK

#phillip k #comedy #funny #mobile #development #programming #jobs #laid off #friend #unemployed #7 11

[phillipkwriter]

Me: Man, this SQL class was pretty tough for an elective. What’s my final grade?

Prof: Mr. K, you did all the work from Website A but not Website B.

Me: I saw we weren’t being graded so I didn’t finish Website B. We’re they worth any points?

Prof: Yes, Website A was worth 5 points.

Me: And Website B?

Prof: 1,400 points.

Me: … oh… well… f*ck.

Prof: Here’s your “C”.

#professor #school #grading #points #teacher #student #sql #mysql #mysql database #website #work #school work #comedy #phillip k #college #funny #writer

[phillipkwriter]

Flappy Bird w/ No pipes

While making my first Flappy Bird game I have run into snags. I’ve got the code right and followed a tutorial but the pipes are not appearing for some reason.

Here’s some screen shots for the folks at StackOverlfow:

#unity #flappy bird #pipes #not working

[phillipkwriter]

#comedy #funny memes #ghostbusters #answer the call #kids #ice cream #parenting

[phillipkwriter]

#meme #funny memes #comedy #funny #cup #empty #dont care

[phillipkwriter]

#dustyslay #comedy #comedian #quote #ted talks #funny #meme #show #wise words

[phillipkwriter]

#keanu reeves #beautiful quote #meme #drew barrymore #show #lover #fighter

[phillipkwriter]

Non-Christmas Movies

There are movies that completely revolve around Christmas; “A Christmas Story”, “A Christmas Carol”, “Christmas Vacation” and the list goes on.

Now, there are movies that take place around Christmas time but do not have anything to do with the holiday. Christmas is just a backdrop for the film while we focus more on the main plot and characters.

You may have heard the argument that the action film “Die Hard” is a Christmas movie because the film takes place during Christmas time. This created a new genre of film, the “Non-Christmas Movie”. Just as described above, it’s any movie that takes place during Christmas, but the plot doesn’t actually revolve around Christmas itself.

Many folks have written up lists of “Non-Christmas” films yet they only choose a set few for a short list such as “Top 20 Non-Christmas movies” or something.

(I am going to attempt to try and list them all and I know I’m going to miss some so if there is a Non-Christmas movie I haven’t listed, please let me know in the comments and I can amend the list.)

List:

Die Hard

Die Hard 2

Batman Returns

Reindeer Games

Krampus

Trapped in Paradise

Edward Scissorhands

Lethal Weapon

Trading Places

Rambo

Ghostbusters 2

Scrooges

Rocky IV

Kiss kiss Bang bang

Harry Potter & The Sorcerer’s Stone

American Psycho

LA Confidential

Gremlins

The Lady and the Tramp

Mean Girls

Catch Me if You Can

The Thin Man

You’ve Got Mail

The Apartment

Iron Man 3

Three Days of the Condor

The Long Kiss Goodnight

Meet me in St Louis

Babe

Holiday Inn

Little Women

Steel Magnolias

The Sound of Music

The Chronicles of Narnia

Eyes Wide Shut

Invasion USA

Carol

Werewolves Within

Mean Girls

Prometheus

Goodfellas

The Holiday

Serendipity

Let It Snow

Bachelor Mother

Remember the Night

Lady in the Lake

It Happened on 5th Avenue

Holiday Affair

Susan Slept here

Bell, Hook & Candle

Placido

The Silent Partner

Cast Away

End of Days

The Ice Harvest

Tangerine

Female Trouble

Call Me By Your Name

Star Trek Generations

Go

The City of Lost Children

The Proposition

Bad Santa

Brazil

In Bruges

Better Watch Out

The Ref

Godmothered

While You Were Sleeping

(So far that’s about 70 films.)

-PK

#Christmas #movie #list #non Christmas movie #film #fan #holiday #comedy #funny #lists #non

[phillipkwriter]

Yup, that pretty much sums it up.

#spongebob squarepants #meme #comedy #funny #Patrick #squidward #life #growing up #adult #child

[phillipkwriter]

Professor: Ok, this week I need you to make a webpage using JQuery Mobile.

Me: Ummmm, did you know that JQueryMobile is no longer supported as of this month?

Prof: Ooooooo…. Well, crap.

#coding #comedy #college #jquery #jquerymobile #updates #supported #software #keep up

[phillipkwriter]

Hey all, I’ve been very absent from here because I’m learning to code and built my first game with JavaScript using HTML and CSS.

But I’ve also started a podcast, The Dudeist Journey.

See, my little brother died of an overdose in 2020 and I haven’t been the same. I’m dealing with a lot of guilt and depression and constantly questioning myself. Needless to say, it’s been a tough time.

So, since I’m a Reverend in the Church of the Latter Day Dude, I started writing sermons to help cope and they’ve helped me along. My family asked if I’d share them so I am. I got 3 up so far and you are more than welcome to join me on this journey as I look the world of religion, philosophy and science to find answers in this mad world.

Join me?

https://anchor.fm/thedudeistjourney

#phillip k #dudeist #podcast #comedy #funny #sermon #religious #religion #philosophy #dude #big lebowski #jesus #writer #author #church

[phillipkwriter]

Game Design Documents

Aimee Dansby has a free template for download.

I’ve been working with a small indie company, Animus Entertainment, writing my goofy “Ghoul-Chaser” books. The company is growing, they have contracts for toy licenses and such, and wants to grow into the world of gaming.

I had made a board game that the company showed interest, but the artist left during production so I may be the one finishing that on my own. But the company’s main interest was video games.

I’m currently studying Unity to make my own games that I’ve always wanted to make. Creating video games seemed impossible without knowing a ton of code, but thanks to new engines like Unity, it’s much easier. You still have to know some code, but as a designer, this was music to my ears.

As I was developing my first game, Animus got wind of my work and asked if I would become a Game Designer for their small company while I studied Unity and C#. 

This was a dream come true. I’ve always wanted to make video games professionally, even if it was just a small indie company. I took the offer and started designing my first video game. However, Animus did ask for one thing: a Game Design Document. 

You can debate whether or not GDDs are needed anymore, but I believe they are still necessary to help translate the game’s story and mechanics to others. There are a few different templates out there for GDDs and I snagged one, and started putting my game together. Not all of the levels have been designed yet, but the company said it was fine. They just needed to see something to know what I was building. 

I put together a quick GDD, it’s a small, 10 level game that is similar to Asteroid. My kid has her own YouTube channel that I helped create and designed a character for her, Little Lilly. I used WPS Writer to put it together, but will be using Google Docs for the bigger games. I found a template that I can use, here it is if you would like to use it too: GDD Template FREE!

I’ve decided to post parts of the document here. As I said, it’s not exactly necessary, but I think the practice will do me good. 

-PK

#game design documents #all for the game #design #games #video games #developers #designers #documents #new #coder #coding #unity #words #wps #writer #google docs #creating #interface #levels #audience #animus #entertainment #company #job #start #code #game design #youtube #asteroid #build

[phillipkwriter]

“Mother”, 2020 by #PhillipK., #acrylic on #canvas.

#painting #art #phillip k #independent #designs #new #acrylic #Bob Ross #modern

[phillipkwriter]

Graphic Designer Evolution

When I graduated from community college in 2006, I was ready to step out and become a professional graphic designer.

For almost 15 years, I have created a ton of cool stuff for clients of all types and i have learned one solid thing throughout my years of work and it is this:

Being a graphic designer is not enough.

Allow me to explain.

First, people wanted me to design posters and fliers and photo books and phone books and the like, which was fine. It was what I learned to do.

Then, it was all about websites. All my clients wanted websites. Forget all this print garbage, it was all about the digital world and everyone needed a website.

Then, it was all about designing social media pages. I remember getting paid to design MySpace pages and Facebook pages. I had to learn some HTML and JavaScript. But I was a designer, I wasn’t a programmer, but my clients didn’t care. I could make pretty stuff on the computer, so therefore I could make anything. I had to wing it a few times and was constantly being hit with new software that I had to learn.

Now, it’s all about apps and I don’t know code

I was loosing clients because I couldn’t do the work they wanted. Not to mention that designers were being replaced with AI (artificial intelligence). Thanks to sites like Wordpress, GoDaddy and Wix, ppl didn’t need web designers anymore. There’s a thousand places with a thousand choices and they could just type in their garbage and drag and drop some photos. Why would they need me anymore? The small business owner could just pay his nephew $50 to do it, the nephew who is in graphic design school.

Now, there is a logo designer AI program. I used to charge around $1,000 for a logo, but folks can get it done for free so that business model is failing too.

I’ve had to adapt and adapt again. Technology put the petal to metal on human evolution and we are learning and growing faster and faster.

So, I have to go back to school and learn programming. I was just going to teach myself like I usually do and build a game app but a friend told me about a job offer that I could be lined up to get if I got a certificate of some kind. The starting pay was over $100,000!

I signed up for classes not long after.

I didn’t want to go back to school and be the old guy in class who talks too much.

Luckily, online classes are more popular than ever and I could get this certificate from the comfort of my quarantined home. My first two classes are Web Programming and Computer Programming. I’m thinking the computer programming class is going to be way more intense, but I was horribly wrong.

The computer programming class takes things a step at a time. The first week, all we need to do is read the first chapter of our designated text book, do the exercise following the instructions and then do another exercise by ourselves to see what we learned? Make sense?

But the Web Programming class is just nuts.

We had to find our own textbook, read the first three chapters, then read three web pages of notes comparing our book to the notes so we know if we are on the right track. Make sense?

Then we had to find a resource for HTML, CSS, JavaScript and a site with a Creative Commons license for free photos and such. The instructor could have just given us the info but whatever.

Then we had to design a simple web page, then a more complex web page, THEN design a 3rd web page that uses all the elements from the first two pages but can’t be as simple as the first web page or as complex as the second web page. Make sense?

Then we had to take a quiz.

... what ... the .... $&@!%!!!!

I’m trying to get a cert in computer programming but I’m gonna be an HTML programmer by the time I get finished with all this work and by that time my job will be replaced by an AI program.

Make sense?

-PK

#graphic design #designer #programming #school #work #clients #new #independent #designs #phillip k #college #comedy #web #html #c++ programming #online #classes #css #javascript #education #old man #community #ai #artificiallife #artificial intelligence #wordpress #wix #godaddy #logo

[phillipkwriter]

Goodbye, Microsoft Word. I can’t afford you anymore.

It was the 90’s.

Grunge was cool, Beavis and Butthead were all over the place and the internet was blowing up.

The Age of Technology was abound, the millennium was upon us and hopes were high. Really high because this new weed from Mexico was awesome.

I was in high school and computers were becoming more and more apart of our education. At first, it was simple games like “Word Muncher”. Then we started writing reports using a computer.

Most of our reports for school were handwritten and then they started making us use typewriters because some of us couldn’t spell and our handwriting was horrible. My cursive is illegible but my print was ok. Working with typewriters was fine, but messy if you had to change the ink ribbon, even if your typewriter was electric.

So computers started showing up in every classroom, usually in the back, and there was now a computer lab in the library where you could access the Internet and work on reports. We had to learn how to operate Windows and Internet Explorer. It was really cool because everything was free.

Free videos, free websites, free access to information and free programs. When you bought a PC it had Windows and it came with all these free programs. The one we learned the most in school was Microsoft Word, part of the Office programs. I loved Word. It was great! All these options and features! I loved it!

And it was FREE!

Then something happened after I graduated high school and started college.

The government brought charges in an antitrust case against Microsoft for monopolizing certain software. Ex: since Internet Explorer was already installed on a PC, most folks wouldn’t try other programs like Opera. (which is BS becuz Opera just sucks.)

This caused Microsoft to no longer allow Office to be free on the PC. When you bought a computer then you would have to buy Microsoft Office which included Word separately. That means that after you shelled out hundreds of dollars for a PC now you had to fork over $200 more dollars to buy the program that you’ve been using for free for the past 10 years.

Microsoft Word was, literally, probably the only main program used for wordprocessing at the time. The only other program we had was Notepad and Notepad was terrible. Soon they came out with WordPad which was fine but once again it was limited and did not have all the features required to write a college level report. I had no choice but to spend the extra $200, which was a lot of money for me because I was working in fast food, and buy the program.

Microsoft was doing well with allowing you to buy one version of the program and update it year after year.

But that’s changed.

Now if you have an older version of Microsoft Office, even if it’s a legitimate copy that you purchased and it has a legitimate serial number, and you try to install it on your system Microsoft will not allow you to. I should know, I tried.

Nowadays if you want Microsoft office you have to pay a monthly subscription fee which is all the rage now. Every time I want to get a program, which I would buy an older version for cheaper on eBay, but now I can’t even do that. Instead, they’re throwing away single use purchase of programs and want you to do a monthly subscription fee so they can constantly get money out of you.

Luckily, you don’t have to fork over the cash for Word. Thanks to open-source software, Word alternatives have been released and will read all your old Word files without jumbling them into a complete mess.

I currently use WPS Office which has the Writer program and it does everything Word does. For free.

Since I have an iPhone, I’ve also been using Pages which is Free. There’s also Google Docs. That’s free too.

So, it is with fond memories and great sadness that I say goodbye to Microsoft Word.

Sorry, girl. I can’t afford your high prices anymore. Hope those rich boys love you as good as I did.

-PK

#microsoft #office #word #programs #90’s grunge #90s nostalgia #90s style #90s #computers #independent #phillip k #comedy #college #wps office free crack #wps office #word muncher #free #dead #blog #writing #pages #apple #notepad #money #antitrust #lawsuit #government

[phillipkwriter]