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klapollo week day 1 - confessions

a love song in disguise

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yeah i'll leave this here too

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That beautiful little cat smile :)

Your daily dose of cat memes

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Watching the new criminal minds and they flipped the ends of Prentiss’ hair. But they didn’t flip a chunk of hair in the back. So there’s just a random chunk of straight hair when the rest of it was flipped and styled.

That is all.

#criminal minds #derek morgan #spencer reid #aaron hotchner #emily prentiss #hotch #david rossi

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Hotch and Jack in the grocery store.

Jack, with his knees drawn up to his chest, resting his head on them and just enjoying being pushed around in the cart. A random man walks by– Jack with his voice half-raised to a whisper, “dad.”

Hotch scowling at the grocery list and trying to decide if he should get apple juice, fruit punch, orange juice, or maybe the grape cranberry. 

“Dad!”

Hotch grunts and turns his attention to his son, obviously annoyed. Jack’s a teenager, he kind of thought the days of being bothered to death for a toy were over. 

Jack, shifting around so he’s closer to his father and his voice dropped to a whisper, “do you think that guy over there–” Jack nods his head, subtly, in the direction of the man in question. “I mean, does he, does he look like a family annihilator or…?”

Hotch sighs. He knew he shouldn’t have let Jack into his old criminal psychology textbooks. But this is also 100% his doing so the blame really falls on his shoulder’s. “Jack,” admonishes but then again… 

Jack settles back into the cart and Hotch steps forward and decides on the grape cranberry and with a second thought grabs the apple juice too. As he’s bending over to grab the apple juice he catches the man’s eyes and Hotch schools his features. Uncomfortable with the chill hat runs down his spine.

As they’re walking away, Hotch’s eyes on the list, he mumbles, “he did.”

Jack smirks to himself and pulls his knees back to his chest. “Knew it,” he mumbles back. 

#no no but I’ll go in a store and just think #that man would definitely cut my hands off #or some gory ish like that #it’s always a white man too #with the serial killer glasses

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I found this funny incorrect Criminal Minds quote and i had to draw it. ( And i really love funny coming out stories. They remind my of my coming out.)

If you think it funny, feel free to reblog :)

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Did I scream when the dude I clown makeup touched the car window? Yes, yes I did.

And not a single person told me that there was a creepy clown episode in season 13 of criminal minds? NOT A SINGLE PERSON-

#criminal minds #derek morgan #spencer reid #aaron hotchner #emily prentiss #hotch #david rossi

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Reid introducing himself as Spencer to little kids he’s helping is giving me life.

#criminal minds #derek morgan #spencer reid #aaron hotchner #emily prentiss #hotch #david rossi

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And not a single person told me that there was a creepy clown episode in season 13 of criminal minds? NOT A SINGLE PERSON-

#criminal minds #derek morgan #spencer reid #aaron hotchner #emily prentiss #hotch #david rossi

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Linda Barnes is annoying me, please tell me she dies.

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That certainly is an answer. Okay, you get half a bagel.

@pyrotechnics84

I’m willing to bet no one can guess both of my favorite Criminal Minds characters.

I’d bet a toasted peanut butter and jam bagel (mmm) that no one could guess both.

#aaron hotchner #criminal minds #emily prentiss #david rossi #jj jareau #spencer reid #dr spencer reid #derek morgan

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Okay no one is getting a toasted peanut butter and jam bagel because I’m hungry and I had a heck of a headache all day long so

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I’m willing to bet no one can guess both of my favorite Criminal Minds characters.

I’d bet a toasted peanut butter and jam bagel (mmm) that no one could guess both.

#aaron hotchner #criminal minds #emily prentiss #david rossi #jj jareau #Penelope Garcia #spencer reid #dr spencer reid #derek morgan

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oh i remember seeing this in NCIS. And then Torres shattered the whole wall of lava lamps.

What’s encrypting your internet surfing? An algorithm created by a supercomputer? Well, if the site you’re visiting is encrypted by the cyber security firm Cloudflare, your activity may be protected by a wall of lava lamps.

Cloudflare covers websites for Uber, OKCupid, & FitBit, for instance. The wall of  lamps in the San Francisco headquarters generates a random code. Over 100  lamps, in a variety of colors, and their patterns deter hackers from accessing data.  

As the lava lamps bubble and swirl, a video camera on the ceiling monitors their unpredictable changes and connects the footage to a computer, which converts the randomness into a virtually unhackable code.

Codes created by machines have relatively predictable patterns, so it’s possible for hackers to guess their algorithms, posing a security risk. Lava lamps, add to the equation the sheer randomness of the physical world, making it nearly impossible for hackers to break through.

You might think that this would be kept secret, but it’s not. Simply go in and ask to see the lava lamp display. By allowing people to affect the video footage, human movement, static, and changes in lighting from the windows work together to make the random code even harder to predict.

So, by standing in front of the display, you add an additional variable to the code, making it even harder to hack. Isn’t that interesting? 

via atlasobscura.com

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random JJ headcanons

1. JJ goes to court whenever one of the kids or women they save has to testify. She comforts them beforehand, sits right in front so they can see her, and then buys them dinner afterwards.

2. She says she knows some high school spanish, but after a couple years on the job, she starts learning more again. She gets Emily to teach her. She wants to be able to comfort families better.

3. She adds everyone she helps on facebook so she can keep track of them and she sends the birthday messages every year and congratulates them on milestones and victories.

4. She goes to the women’s march every year. She protests the Pro-Life March in DC. She donates to a bunch of charities that help homeless people.

5. If she hears about a planned parenthood having a particularly hard time, she’ll go to it and wear her badge and gun and stand by the door and help women walk through the crowd. She doesn’t justify herself by saying she has children. She just helps the women who want to enter the planned parenthood.

6. She organizes an FBI It Gets Better video (even if she’s straight in canon boo).

7. She’s the one that agents call if they need to call out a superior for being homophobic or racist. She’ll absolutely use her Pretty White Girl Privilege to support her coworkers.

8. She purposefully finds diverse mom groups and play groups for her sons because she knows that they’re upper middle class white boys. She also makes Will watch and read a bunch of stuff because he’s a good guy, but he has some misconceptions and she is not! here! for! it! She reads/watches them all with him because she needs to learn, too.

9. She’s not religious at all and when unsubs or shitty civilians or cops turn to her to support their beliefs, she’s like “what’s the bible?” and refuses to engage.

10. She joked about not actually believing in psychics, but she totally fucking does. She has an astrology app and whenever someone in the team does something annoying she says “that’s so [whatever] sun [whatever] moon of you”. Whenever Emily does something Chaotic or Gay or Chaotic Gay, JJ just says “you’re such a fucking Libra” and Emily has no idea what that means.

Bonus: JJ is married, but she 100% makes out with Pen/Emily/Tara whenever she’s drunk and Will has just learned to accept it. He draws the line at sex, but JJ is working on it.

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i’ve seen a lot of Jack Hotchner the grown up lawyer, but have we ever considered Jack Hotchner the graphic novelist? 

He starts copying Marvel and DC comics, like fanfictions of them, and then one day his art teacher introduces him to artliners. He gets super, duper, into it and really works on his art style while ranges from kind of realistic to these really thick, stylized, dark lines. 

Hotch not knowing what to buy Jack for his birthday so he buys an art subscription box and suddenly every week Hotch finds a new comic spread, sometimes it’s superheroes, sometimes it’s what Jack remembers of the Team. 

And then there’s Jack’s favourite ever sketchbook that’s turned into a graphic novel called “Mom look out for Jack anyway (and Dad too)” where Jack draws all the things Haley missed so she can see them (just on the off chance she was looking out for someone else). It’s thicc cause he just started to add loose leafs of paper when he ran out of pages. 

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happy birthday aaron hotchner!

jack will try and fail to make him breakfast in bed, setting the smoke alarm off which will wake hotch up ten minutes before his alarm was set to go off. when he enters the kitchen, jack will look down from the stool he’s stood on and grin. hotch won’t be angry, just a bit amused, and jack will wash up whilst hotch makes them edible pancakes.

jessica will come over before she goes to work with her present- a new tie and a teddy bear that says happy 60th birthday even though he’s not quite 50 yet- as well as a balloon and a cupcake, completely covered in various sprinkles and sweets (him and jack will split it because he’s getting old now and he needs to watch his sugar levels (although he’ll never admit it)

penelope would’ve been watching, waiting to see when he signed in. as soon as he did, she ran up the elevator, making sure it closed before he spotted her, ignoring the stares from other agents. when hotch steps out three minutes after her, she hands him a gift bag. it’s pink. the present is a lump. a soft toy for his office. before he can protest, she grabs his arm- it’s almost funny to watch this petite, brightly dressed woman drag him- still dressed in a suit despite having stepped down as unit chief years ago and only going on some out of state cases- towards the bullpen, shouting the words to happy birthday.

derek pulls him in for a hug, jokingly calling him old man but hotch knows he means it as a compliment and that he’s relieved that they’re even here. there had been too many close calls recently. but instead of focusing on that, he focuses on the box he pulls out of his desk drawer. it’s wrapped neatly (jj’s influence) with the same paper hotch used for jack’s birthday. inside is a tie, bright yellow with green squares and purple triangles all over it. it’s clearly meant to be a joke, but hotch smiles, pulls his current tie off and replaces it with the ugly one from his friend.

dave kisses his forehead, the gesture more paternal than anything else. he’ll hold his cheeks, stare into his eyes until hotch blushes, looking downwards. dave shakes his head and says he still can’t stop viewing hotch as the bright-eyed agent he met in seattle, and that he probably never will. hotch smiles but he knows there’s a deeper meaning: when dave returned, he was a mess- he’d never done the job without his two mentors and he’d been terrified he’d never get back that innocence. he hadn’t (how could he) but he’s accepted that. and he’s getting better everyday. in his office there is a handknitted sweater (blue because it’s the colour that suits him best).

jennifer knows how hotch still has trouble sleeping through the night so she pretends that she got both him and jack presents because- in her own words- it’s just what her and hotch do. in fact, both things are for him. the first is a journal- one of those old fashioned leatherbound ones for all the stories he came up with when henry and jack were kids (and sometimes he tells them new ones). she wants him to write them down so if jack and henry are ever sad, they can read them and remember how much he loves them. the second is glow in the dark stars. you can make constellations from them, that’s how many small ones there are. she knows hotch will set them up in the living room so when him and jack can’t sleep, they can make a pillowfort and look at them.

spencer awkwardly presents the felt hat they made him wear on his 25th birthday because although 49 isn’t exactly a milestone, they were always out on cases when he hit those so he’d take what he can get. hotch smiles but puts it on without hesitating because he can never say no to spencer. when he puts it on, reid smiles, then hands him his present. it’s a box that he shakes to try and work out what’s in there. he can’t tell so he opens it: there’s a mug and a card addressed to the best dad ever, a collection of different teas (all decaf because he also needs to cut down on his caffiene) as well as a new tie- one with books all over it. he smiles slightly, grinning when he realises that under the tie is that law book he’d been wanting to read but hadn’t because he wanted his own copy to annotate.

emily is the one that brings the cake in because she decided to take up baking a month before his birthday for this exact purpose. it’s not perfect, but it’s got the right texture and is soft so it’s deemed edible. her decoration was an absolute disaster because piping is difficult and you need more than a few weeks to perfect that art, but it’s still the best thing hotch has ever seen. the cake is salted caramel- his favorite and has been very generously covered in chocolate buttercream. the piping was done in white and spells out in sloppy handwriting happy 100th birthday hotshot, and he’s going to kill dave for getting drunk and calling him that, but it’s still lovely. because it’s from emily. emily who bought him a new watch because she hates metal straps and wants him to own a watch with a leather strap so he can: “look more like the dark academic professor all the newbies wished he was” whatever that meant and a copy of her favourite book that year, as per the tradition they’d started when he was still working for her mother and had hesitantly given her a copy of  les mis (in the original french) mumbling something about how he loved the book and thought of her when he picked it up at the bookshop.

he cuts the cake, not even hesitating when garcia picked up the first slice and fed it to him. because this is his home and this team of goofballs, despite the fact that he’s got lipstick and icing and god knows what else they’ve been eating smeared on his dry clean only blazer, is his family. and he wouldn’t trade them for the world.

(anderson drops off a card and box of chocolates off later on in the day. it’s not even close to hotch’s favourite but he appreciates the thought.)

#aaron hotchner #aaron hotch hotchner #hotch #jack hotchner #criminal minds #criminal minds headcanons #hotch's birthday #happy birthday hotch #jessica brooks #garcia