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plsimsuchasimp · 3 years

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pt 2: haikyuu boys crying

part 1: oikawa, kageyama, bokuto, kenma, aran, sugawara

genre: angst/fluff

ft: Asahi, Ushijima, Kuroo, Sakusa, Suna, Osamu, Atsumu

warnings: mention of makeup in Ushijima’s hc, sadness

wc: 790

a/n: sorry these definitely aren’t the best but i hope they’re okay at least

Asahi’s eyes are wide as he sees you flinch when he throws his arms in the air, all anger instantly draining out of him. He seems to shrink immediately, chin trembling as he reaches towards you hesitantly. His brow furrows and you take his hand, letting him hold yours between his huge ones. “You know I’d never hurt you, right?” he whispers, eyes begging you to say yes. “R-right?” You nod, but tears are already forming in his eyes and you can see the insecurities whirling, the guilt already haunting him. You approach him, hugging him tightly as if to reassure him that it’s going to be okay. (song: don’t cry by sadeyes)

Ushijima strokes your hair as he slips into bed next to you, swallowing hard to see your puffy eyebags and tear streaks, messing up the makeup you’d spent such a long time doing. He knew he wasn’t always the best boyfriend, and when he’d forgotten the dinner date you two had planned, he felt awful about it. He didn’t really understand how you felt, but he knew he had to be better. Unable to resist, he pulls you into his arms and feels your body relax against him, the familiar position providing warmth to you both. He gently kisses your head, taking a deep breath of your scent as unprecedented moisture formed in his eyes. He doesn’t want to let you go. (song: i never wanna lose you by Snøw & Teqkoi)

Kuroo watches you from across the hallway, glaring at your new boyfriend that’s making you laugh, harder than he ever did. He slouches, fists clenching involuntarily as the guy leans in to kiss you. It makes his stomach twist to see someone other than him soaking in your attention, seeing your eyes light up. It’s been increasingly hard to focus recently when you’re so happy near your new boyfriend, seemingly forgetting everything you’d done with Kuroo, the secret smiles and grateful hugs after practice or games. At home, he let himself cry for the first time in almost six months. You were ten chapters in Kuroo’s book, but was he even a page in yours? (song: i’m sick of trying by Vaboh)

Sakusa stares at the ceiling like he has for the past month, ever since he left you. Muffled music blasts from the apartment next door, and he rolls over to make a snide remark about it, forgetting momentarily that you’re not laying next to him anymore. He flicks on the light, trying to ignore the pit of guilt and longing in his stomach. Walking about the room, he starts cleaning. Kiyoomi let himself go when he let you go, and it hasn’t been the same since. Into the early hours of the morning, tears drip onto his hands as he picks up the pieces of clothing that smell too much like you. (song: baby you’re worth it by Kina)

Suna walks through the strip mall at 1:30 in the morning, listening to the cheap speakers blast music. His fingers twitch to the beat, remembering how you used to hold them, your eyes sparkling as you pulled him forward. There’s nothing there anymore, just empty space. His entire life is empty space, vacant gaps where you used to be. You let him go so easily, but he can’t do the same. Now he tucks his hands in his pockets and pulls his hood up to hide his glimmering eyes, pretending he never missed you at all. (song: circles by Post Malone)

Osamu’s eyes fill as he sees your radiant smile beaming at him from the other side of the room. You run towards him and kiss him, hand gently stroking the back of his head. You can feel him, his happiness, in your arms at last. For weeks, he hasn’t seen you, and as he pulls you close to him, he can’t stop his hands from shaking just a bit, burying his face in your shoulder and reveling in your presence. He’s so glad to be home. (song: drowning by Ondi Vil)

Atsumu leans back in his car, speakers blaring Joji as rain pelts down on the metal roof. His lips tremble and he runs his hand through his hair, trying to steady his resolve, but as the beat drops, it sinks in. He’s alone. At this point, he’s pushed everyone who used to care away, even his own brother. Even you. A breathless sob escapes him, his desperation showing in the form of hot tears leaking from closed eyes. You should be with him, I can’t compete. He deserves it, the way everyone left. It’s his fault, but it doesn’t make it hurt any less. (song: slow dancing in the dark by Joji)

a/n: wowza it’s been a while :) this is a draft btw <3 love y’all but i probably won’t be posting much more, if at all take care, drink water, you’ll be okay

playlist i listened to while making these hcs:

sad songs to cry to by chilled sad

#atsumu x reader #angst #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!!#haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu #haikyuu angst #osamu x y/n #osamu miya #Suna Rintarou #suna x reader #sakusa kiyoomi #Kuroo Tetsurou #ushijima headcanons #asahi x reader #byebye #love you #ily #<3

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plsimsuchasimp · 3 years

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LMAOOO THIS IS SCARY

PLS WHAT IS THIS HELP

#NFTumblcryptids

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plsimsuchasimp · 3 years

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Congrats on your milestone!! I’d like a matchup if you’d please! I’m a 5ft 3 girl, I have mid-back length brown hair, I’m plus sized with a round face and big hazel eyes. I’m an ENFP, 2w1 and I am the mom friend. I love caring for others (I’m studying to be a nurse) and I love making people laugh - I’m a jokester and my friends describe me as witty and feisty too. I can have a slightly short temper but I don’t stay mad long and can’t hold a grudge, and I apologize waaaay too much. I love cuddling and hugs, I can also be kinda chaotic at times but I can also be mature, it’s sorta 50-50. Hobbies include reading, writing, baking, pottery, archery, listening to music and watching films/tv shows. I don’t know what kins are so I’m not sure if this is right, but if it’s a character(s) I relate to, it’s probably Sugawara. Thank you so much!! Congratulations again!!!

hi! so for your matchup, i’m thinking daichi, and here’s why.

first off, daichi deals with sugawara all day, and they’re a great pair. he’s an ENFJ, and he would be incredibly loyal to you, as well as supporting you and doing your hobbies with you. he’s very mature, and that would be good for your personality, because he’s not the type to get into petty fights or arguments with you. he’d love every part of you, especially your insecurities (whether physical or mental) and I feel like you would just be a good couple. it would let you relieve some stress, especially from assuming a mature/parent role around most of your friends, because he won’t expect you to be something you are out of stress. i hope you like this! sorry it was a bit short.

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plsimsuchasimp · 3 years

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hi, just wanted to say that your angst fics are some of the most painful i’ve ever read but in the best way!! the buildup and ultimate Heart Crushing Moment are ~intense~ and i love it so much :) i hope u have an amazing day/evening <33

hi!! thank you so much, this means a ton to me and i’m so glad you like my writing! my mental health hasn’t been the best recently, so i’m kind of procrastinating fics that need to be written, but i’m trying to get them out as soon as I can. once again, thank you so much for the support and i’m v glad you enjoy them.

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plsimsuchasimp · 3 years

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okay okay okay go take this quiz but i got the sweetheart with a dark past and it’s scarily accurate BUT we’re going to ignore that bc i don’t need to be exposed rn

have fun with this!

ok, here’s my uquiz: which type of love interest would you be in a dating simulator? :)

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plsimsuchasimp · 3 years

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101 followers event

hi everyone! i’ve been being extremely lazy recently and ignoring the asks in my inbox, (sorry about that) :D but i wanted to say thank you so much for 101 followers, that’s crazy! anyways, i’m going to do a matchup event in celebration. if you’d like to participate, please send an ask telling me about you, your personality, what you look like (if you’d like to/are comfortable with it), your top kins, and i’ll do a short personality analysis and match you up with the haikyuu character i think you’d go with.

example:

hi, i’d like to participate in your 100 followers event! I’m a female 5′5 INFJ with hip-length hair. i like to write and play music as hobbies etc etc. (... lmao sorry i have no idea how to talk about myself, but hopefully you do! :D i’ll try to get to you and i’ll probably close this when i get a certain number of asks [i completely suck at planning so we’ll see how it goes])

thanks again for 101 followers!

#-xx #101 followers event #haikyuu #haikyuu x reader

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plsimsuchasimp · 3 years

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hello! just a lil smth, please don’t scroll!

tw // anti-asian violence

there’s been a fuck ton of aapi hate since the beginning of the pandemic and especially lately, with the georgia shootings today, and even the grammys last sunday

all this said i just wanted to share a few resources (none mine!):

- anti-asian violence resources (this resource is also linked in my pinned, it contains information, petitions, places to donate and a lot more)

- stop asian hate (contains petitions, places to donate, ways to spread the word and more)

- sites to donate to and share (if you have a twitter please consider retweeting)

- a cumulative twitter thread with a little bit of everything and more than i explained

+ stop asian hate gofundme

+ asian american resource center (an atlanta based foundation focused on housing and civil classes)

—

if you have any resources you wanna share reply and/or reblog and i’ll add it, and with that please share this with the same tags <3 sending love to my fellow aapi, please stay safe all of you and don’t be fucking racist :]

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plsimsuchasimp · 3 years

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tell me how you feel about me on anon!

🌞 - i really like your blog! 🌙 - you’re really cute! ✨ - i love seeing you on my dash! ☄️ - we don’t talk, but i wish we did! ❄️ - you’re my best friend! 🌸 - you’re really sweet! 💫 - you’re super talented! ⭐️ - you have a nice aesthetic! 🌹 - i have a crush on you! 💐 - i wish i could take care of you when you’re sad! 💥 - you seem a little bit intimidating! 🔥 - you need to stop being so hard on yourself! 🍂 - i don’t like you very much! 🌈 - i think i really like you…

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plsimsuchasimp · 3 years

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yup! bisexual demigirl (still figuring it out) here

Can you please reblog if your blog is a safe place for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, asexual, aromantic, pansexual, non binary, demisexual or any other kind of queer or questioning people? Because mine is.

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plsimsuchasimp · 3 years

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this is so cute pls ty for supplying my daily seratonin

how the haikyuu boys goofed up their confession part three

feat. Kita, Aran, Suna, Atsumu, Osamu

♡ part one, part two, part four

KITA

oh this boy is so adorable

he asks his granny for advice on how to confess to you

she tells him to just be himself and that you would like him no matter what he did 🥺

which is like super cute- but like?? okay gran that doesn’t really give him any ideas

Keep reading

#haikyuu #this is so fucking cute

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plsimsuchasimp · 3 years

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hii, could you do another part to haikyuu boys crying? whichever ones you want to, i think the first part was amazing !

part 1: oikawa, kageyama, bokuto, kenma, aran, sugawara

genre: angst/fluff

ft: Asahi, Ushijima, Kuroo, Sakusa, Suna, Osamu, Atsumu

warnings: mention of makeup in Ushijima’s hc, sadness

wc: 790

a/n: sorry these definitely aren’t the best but i hope they’re okay at least

playlist i listened to while making these hcs:

sad songs to cry to by chilled sad

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plsimsuchasimp · 3 years

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i’m sorry (ft: sugawara).

by request: “Hi!!!! Okay im so glad your requests are open - could I please request some angst with Sugawara? Where the reader is his best friend and secretly loves him but he doesn’t know? Then maybe the reader and Suga fight and then reader gets hurt or something (maybe a car accident) and when the Karasuno team finds out, Suga is devastated and goes to the hospital and tell the reader that he loves them?? Thank you!! ❤️” -anon

yes anon i’m happy to do this- i kinda changed up the prompt a lil bit so i’m sorry about that but i hope this measures up to your standards! (i’m ridiculously soft for suga so this makes sense)

genre: sadness (literal tears were shed in the process of making this)

ft: sugawara koushi x reader

warnings: car crash, fighting, cursing, hospitalization, death

wc: 2k

“Y/n, why are you so upset? I get that you’re concerned, and I’m grateful for that, but she’s genuinely a good person and I’m serious about her!” Suga walks away from you, his back turned, shoulders raised slightly in his sweater. You can sense his frustration, his confusion, but you don’t care. His face is pouty, lip sticking out ever so slightly, and you know you can’t look at him or you won’t be able to keep yourself from kissing him right then and there.

The thing is, you know she’s a good person. And that’s what hurts. See, you’ve been in love with Sugawara Koushi since the day you met him at the bus stop five years ago, on a hot summer day with a butterfly in his hair.

You can’t stop him from getting a new girlfriend, and you know it’s selfish of you to hope he likes you the way you like him, to hold on to him for all these years.

Sometimes when it’s late, you let yourself drift into your memories. The spring days when he would take you hiking, out into the mountains to show you his favorite spots, the times when your stomachs hurt from laughing at the dirty jokes he found off of random places on the internet, the rainy moments and baking cookies when it just seemed calm. With Suga, you felt at home like nowhere else.

Now, your eyes sting unfairly, and you turn away from him as he glares towards you, brow furrowed. Struggling to keep your voice even, you say, “I know, okay Kou? I just- I don’t know, she gives me bad vibes.”

You know he doesn’t mean to be rude, but when he scoffs, your heart squeezes just a bit and tears prick your eyes. “You’re telling me to call off a whole relationship because she gives you bad vibes? You did this with all of my exes, too!” Suga sighs, hands on his hips. “You know you’re my best friend, but honestly, y/n, this has to stop. You can’t control my life!”

He’s right. You know he’s right, and that’s the harsh thing about it. You want him all to yourself- everything about him is entrancing, intoxicating, familiar. Jealousy is a bitch.

“Don’t tell me what to do.”

At this point, his jaw drops open at the sheer audacity of your remark. “I can’t do this with you today.” He throws up his hands and sits on the bed, making it clear he doesn’t really want to talk anymore.

Suga never really fights with you. He teases endlessly, but he always stops himself before he really hurts you, and the fights between the two of you are always calmer on his side. He’s usually the first to apologize, but it seems this is a sticking point for the two of you.

“Well? Go!” As soon as the words are out of his mouth, he regrets it. You flinch backwards at his words, and he doesn’t miss the unmistakable glint of tears in your eyes as you walk out of the room.

“Fine, I guess I will!” As soon as you’re outside, you cover your mouth with your hand, your vision blurred from large drops threatening to spill from your eyelashes. You muffle your sobs with the sleeve of a sweatshirt Suga lent you, and it just makes you cry harder when you breathe in his slight cologne.

He wasn’t going to let her go this time. You missed your chance.

You’re running, but where to? As soon as your thoughts stop spinning, your feet freeze, and you glance around you. Shaky breaths escape you as you duck your head and attempt to cross the street, questioning looks from passerby making your cheeks heat up.

All of a sudden, you hear a car horn and freeze to see a car speeding towards you, out of control. The last thing you see before everything goes black is a child pointing at you, and you almost laugh at the incredulity of the situation. Then you black out on impact.

Back at Suga’s home, he sits in his bed, running his fingers through his silky hair. He curses under his breath, already hating the feeling.

He hates when the only person he’s ever truly loved is mad at him.

Honestly, Koushi can’t fathom why he keeps getting other people to date him, momentary distractions from his everlasting affection for you. You, the only person who’s there for him when he’s hurting, the only real friend to stay near him through everything, the only person he fell in love with on first sight. He wanted to be with you, but he didn’t want to ruin this was.

Better to be certain friends with you and never get what he truly wanted than to try and lose you completely.

Suga picks up the phone to text you when he receives a call from an unfamiliar number, marked as the hospital of your district.

“Hello?"

“Is this Sugawara Koushi?” The female voice on the other end of the line asks.

“Yes, is everything okay?” He responds, curious as to why the hospital is calling him in the middle of the day.

“Well, we have Y/N L/N here, and you’re listed as one of their emergency contacts. Would you mind coming to the hospital to fill out some paperwork?”

Immediately, his world freezes. “W-what did you say?”

“I said, Y/N L/N is in the hospital and we need you to come in and see them.” She’s patient with him, voice even and calm, clearly used to people in shock from news of their loved ones. “They were involved in a car accident.”

He nods, momentarily forgetting she can’t see him. “Yeah, I’m on my way.”

The line clicks, and he sits there for only a minute before hurrying down to his car, grabbing the keys and starting the car. He seems to forget basic movements, mind consumed only with thoughts of you.

“Shit, shit, shit,” he muttered, edging above the speed limit on the road. He was tempted to honk at someone, but refrains from it, knowing it won’t help with the turmoil of emotions he was feeling.

Then, it hit him. This was his fault. He almost stopped the car in the middle of the road, throat closing as guilt washed over him. Koushi didn’t know you’d take it so hard, didn’t mean for it to come off that harshly.

He arrived at the hospital, and as he walked in, the receptionist looked up at him.

“Sugawara Koushi?”

“Yes,” he said, and watched the smile slowly fade from her face. He noticed she tried to hide it, ducking her head, but it was too late. “Are they- are they going to be okay?” he gulped as she didn’t respond.

“Room 208,” she said curtly, “You should probably go in.”

The lights seemed to blur into each other as Suga practically ran to your room. Every footstep seemed to take forever, travel only a few centimeters forward. He couldn’t get there fast enough, accidentally bumping into the wall and muttering a hushed “sorry” to it.

He arrived. The door was almost too heavy, or maybe it was just the fear making his limbs heavy as lead.

There you lay, and it was worse than he thought. Tubes of all sorts trailed from your body to things around the bed, crowding and seeming to close you in. Scratches ran down your cheek and there was dried blood on your hairline, streaking down your face. The breath fell from his throat and he stood in the doorway, paralyzed.

This could not be happening.

One look and he could tell you weren’t going to be okay. An IV drip led into your left arm, and you were unconscious, so fragile, so angelic. It looked as if you were only sleeping, like the countless times you’d snuggled into Suga’s shoulder in the warm summer nights, staring at the blanket of glittering stars far above. The ones in your eyes, though, outshone them all.

When you slept, you always seemed so peaceful, so comforted, but now your brow was slightly furrowed, your lips drained of color and slightly parted. Even in this state, you were still the most beautiful person he’d ever seen.

Shakily, he made his way to the chair and sat down in it. He tried to swallow, but his throat was dry, and tears were dripping down his face before he could wipe them away. A choked sob escaped him as he reached out his hand, hovering over your limp one.

He took your hand, and he hunched over to feel how cold it was. Your hands were always colder than his, which made him a perfect match for you. Never before, though, had he felt this ice.

Suga’s shoulders began to shake, and he clutched your hand, silently begging you not to leave, please please please don’t leave me, i don’t know if i can survive without you. Of course, there was no response but the steady beep of the heart monitor, the only thing reassuring him that you were still there.

Shaking, he brought your hand to his lips, barely brushing them against your knuckles.

“Y/n, I’m so sorry.” Whispered words fell gently from his lips, trying to stay composed for you. “Please stay with me. Please don’t leave.” His tone rises, voice breaking in desperation. “P-please.”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” He rocked back and forth, holding your hand as if it was the only thing tying him down. “I-I love you.”

There. He said it, those three words he’d wanted to say since the day he saw you smile for the first time. Hopelessly, madly, endlessly in love with you, only you.

When you didn’t respond, he let himself sob, let the pain overtake him. Hot, salty tears spilled onto your hand, and he silently wished for a sign, a movement, anything to show that you weren’t gone just yet.

In that moment, he whispered everything he wanted to say to you, a thousand words choking him and clogging his throat to the point where he couldn’t breathe anymore.

The doctor came in, shutting the door silently behind him. “Sugawara-”

“Call me Suga.” His voice was quiet, reserved, threatening to break.

“I’m afraid y/n isn’t going to make it.” The doctor sighed, mercifully pretending not to notice Suga’s muffled cry. “I’m so sorry for your loss.”

“You’re joking, right?” Suga raised his head, puffy, red eyes desperate. “Please- tell me you’re joking.” The silence from the doctor told him otherwise, and Suga felt his heart shatter in that instant.

He squeezed your hand, and just as he did, the heart monitor stopped beeping, a flat tone emitting from it. He couldn’t stop the heartbroken cry from spilling from his mouth, his breath stolen by the endless constriction of guilt and grief in his chest.

He stayed there for another two hours, crying over your hand limp in his grasp. When Daichi arrived at the hospital to drive him home, he didn’t want to leave.

Suga stared out of the car window, numb. It was impossible- the world couldn’t be this cruel.

It’s your fault, your fault, your fault, the voice in his head whispered. The broken sobs that spilled out of him hurt, stabbed at his breathing, but he didn’t care. It was his fault that you were gone, forever.

The rest of the day passed in a haze, the sun setting with flared colors that you would have loved. The stars were brilliant, but Suga couldn’t look at them. His pillow smelled like you, and everywhere he looked had some imprint, some memory of you. You were the only person he’d ever love, and you had been stolen from the world in an instant.

In the months afterwards, nothing was the same. He saw you everywhere, expecting to see your texts pop up on his phone, accidentally ordered your drink at the boba place you would always go to.

At the funeral, his stiff black suit seemed awkward, but you always said he looked handsome in one. That was the last time he got to see your face besides pictures, the fading memory of the person who loved him for who he was.

the person who he would love for the rest of his life.

you’re an angel in my eyes.

a/n: tbh this is probably one of the most painful things i’ve written so far suga im so sorry also THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH FOR 50 FOLLOWERS ITS CRAZY i finished this at 2am i’m going to be so sad if it flops <\3

#sugawara koushi #suga x reader #sugawara x y/n #koushi sugawara #sugawara angst #sugawara sadness #i'm literally so sorry this is very sad #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!!#haikyuu angst #haikyuu sad #suga x y/n #suga x you #sugawara x reader

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plsimsuchasimp · 3 years

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gone (cheating ft. kenma)

an anon asked me to write another version of this post, so here it is. i’m sorry about this, it’s definitely not my best work.

request: “Can you do another cheating fic but with kenma since he is my favorite character”

genre: angst

ft: kenma kozume x gn reader, a little bit of kuroo tetsuro

wc: 1.8k

warnings: fainting, angst, implied cheating

Flopping down on your bed, you picked up your phone and shot off a quick text message to your boyfriend, Kenma.

“hey babe, can we call? it’s been a really long week and I haven’t seen you in forever,” you wrote, pressing the send button with only a moment’s hesitation.

Sighing, you scrolled upwards a bit, reading through the message history. Recently, his texts had been getting shorter and more abrupt, often making excuses when you asked to see him or talk to him.

1 new message. Distracted, you scrolled down to see Kenma’s text.

“sorry can’t i was just about to sleep”

Frowning, you glanced at the top of the screen. 10:53 pm. He never went to bed this early, let alone slept. Your throat constricted, but you tried to brush it off, the thoughts whispering at the back of your head like malicious pixies, insecurities and harsh words. You stared at the simple string of words, wondering what to say. Are you okay? you’ve seemed off recently. No, you were probably just overthinking it.

“okay, have a good night! ily” Read 10:57 pm. No response.

Putting the phone down, you tried to push it to the back of your thoughts, but it nagged at you. Turning on your PC, you logged onto discord and noticed Kenma’s status. He was playing a multiplayer game, in a VC with one other person. Right-clicking, you ignored the feeling of distrust and clicked on the other player’s profile.

You knew her- she was a friend of Kenma’s from school. Kenma had promised you they were just friends, that you had nothing to worry about, but the insecurities crept in again as you realized he’d been spending a lot more time with her instead of you. Biting your lip, you looked back at your phone, the accusing text glaring at you. It seemed innocuous, seemed like you were overreacting. Kenma didn’t really get why you were insecure- he always told you he only had eyes for you, but lately, it didn’t really feel like it.

The last time you two had hung out, he’d laughed at something on his phone, then turned away when you asked to see what it was, muttering something vague about a funny tiktok. You didn’t think much of it at the time, but with thoughts crowding your head, you wondered if it really had been just a video. Kozume had always been distant- you understood that when you started dating him, but was it too much to ask for a scrap of his attention?

You were torn. On one hand, you wanted to trust Kenma, believe that everything he told you was true and he still loved you like he used to. On the other, your gut was telling you there was something off. Praying that he wasn’t hiding anything, you entered a different browser and logged into his Discord account. You’d given each other the passwords to your socials a while ago, your way of showing that you had nothing to hide.

Incorrect login information. The words appeared in red on the screen, the password field outlined in red. You tried again, ensuring that there were no typos, and it still registered as wrong. Your stomach sank, staring at the message on the screen. He changed his password and didn’t tell you. At this point, you knew something was wrong, but you didn’t want to ask him in fear of seeming insecure or clingy, both traits Kenma disliked. Before you could lose yourself further in the swirling tornado of your thoughts, your phone dinged with a new message. It was from Kuroo.

“hey y/n, are you up? we need to talk.”

Brow furrowing, you responded with “yeah, is everything okay?” He read the text, and then the call icon rang at the top of the screen, red and green buttons buzzing gently. You accepted the call, answering with “Hi Kuroo.”

“Hey y/n,” he said, his voice quieter than normal.

“Are you okay?” He sounded off, sad somehow.

“Y-yeah, I’m fine. There’s something I need to tell you, though.” You paused for a second, hoping it wasn’t what you thought it was, before he continued. “Kenma- Kenma cheated on you.”

“W-what?” Time seemed to stop. you couldn’t, didn’t want to believe your ears. Your breath caught in your throat, shock freezing your body in place.

“Shit, y/n, I’m so sorry. I just found out.” Kuroo was still talking, but you weren’t hearing him. It seemed impossible, even though you’d seen it coming. “Y/n? Are you okay?”

Startled, you choked out, “Yeah, I’m okay, just a little shocked.” a little was an understatement. “H-how did you find out?”

“Well,” he sighed, “I saw him kiss her behind the cafe yesterday. I wanted to tell you sooner, but I was still figuring out what to do.” Guilt laced his words, and you got the feeling there was still something he hadn’t said.

“What else?” From his slight intake of breath, you could tell you’d caught him off guard. He was silent for a moment.

“He’s been texting her on Discord for the past month or so. I think you know her, (f/n)?” You felt your heart crash into your stomach, and your worst fears were confirmed. Switching back onto your computer, you saw that Kenma was still playing the game with the girl, and your stomach clenched.

“Yeah, I know her.” He noticed that your voice was quiet, subdued, and he swallowed.

“Y/n, I’m- I’m sorry. I don’t know what to say.” He was silent then, waiting for you to speak.

“No, no, it’s fine,” You said, your voice oddly calm. “Thank you for telling me.”

“Of course. Hey, are you going to be okay?” He asked, unsure what was really happening inside your head.

“Yeah. I’ll be fine.” Before he had a chance to say anything else, you hung up, mind spinning.

Oddly enough, you didn’t feel anything. You knew in the back of your head that this was your way of coping, that the hurt and anger and sadness would come later, but for now you didn’t care. Methodically, you went to all of your socials and blocked Kenma, hesitating only slightly to block his number in your phone.

You shut off your computer and turned your phone to silent, sitting in silence on your bed. Slowly, your eyes filled with tears that spilled down your cheeks, expressionless besides the gleaming tear streaks staining your face. Your shoulders shook, and everything seemed to crash down at once.

Your body couldn’t keep up, the sobs overtaking you until you were lightheaded. The room was spinning and the shining moonlight was glinting through the blinds at odd angles, seeming to distort your vision. You couldn’t breathe, and then everything faded to black.

You woke up a few seconds later with your head on the pillow, dazed and hearing the blood pound through your head. You groaned and lay there for a couple of minutes, letting your breathing slow.

You got up and brushed your teeth, staring at your puffy eyes in the mirror. It hurt, to know the man you loved didn’t feel the same anymore. What did you do wrong? Were you too clingy, not good enough, not there for him enough? Why would he cheat on you?

Guilt vibrated around you, and it brought back the memories of every other time. It must have been your fault- it always was.

Sleep took you uneasily that night, creeping in around your obsessive, painful thoughts and lulling you to distraction.

The next morning at school, you wiped the pain from your face and moved through the day in a haze. You saw Kenma in the hallway, leaning against the lockers on his phone, and avoided eye contact. When you saw her, (f/n), anger and hurt swelled up in your stomach, and you tried to swallow it and avoid lashing out.

Later, Kenma stared at his phone as an error message popped up when he tried to text you. We’re sorry, the number you’re trying to reach is unavailable. A pit formed in his stomach, and he went to his other socials, reaching the same conclusions in other places.

“Shit,” he muttered under his breath, amber eyes scanning the hallway. You were already gone, though, and he moved through the swarm of people, eyes focused on the exit. Where would you have gone?

When he showed up at your house that afternoon, you were surprised. He doesn’t waste time, showing you his phone and bluntly asking “Why did you block me?” Your eyes widened to see him slouching there, clearly uncomfortable with going out of his way to do this. “Are you angry at me?”

“Kozume, I don’t really want to talk to you right now.” His face twisted at your use of his last name.

“Why not?”

At this point, you sighed, tired of everything. “You cheated on me. That’s why.” Your voice cracks in the last sentence, and the world stops.

His stomach drops as you turn away, the weight of the world on your shoulders. “N-no. Y/n. Please don’t go!”

Kenma’s not good with words, and you understand that. Sometimes, though, it feels like he’s not trying. As he shook his head frantically, chin-length hair swaying around his beautiful face, you could tell he wanted to say something, but he can’t.

“What is there to say, Kozume?” Your eyes were brimming with tears, your heart squeezing at the sight of him.

“I didn’t- I didn’t mean to.” Even he knows how weak this sounds, how pathetic of him, and when he looks back up at you, his eyes are shiny. “I love you.”

His words ring hollow, and you scoff. “Where was that love when you kissed her behind the cafe? Where was it when you were constantly texting her on discord? Where was it when I needed you and you weren’t there?” You shake your head, heartbreak written all over your features. It’s then that he remembers the declined calls, the unanswered texts, the neglect he subjected you to as he pushed you away.

“I hope you’re happy with her, because we’re done.”

He didn’t even have a good reason this time. All he knew was that he wanted you to stay, but he knew he didn’t deserve a second chance. Against his will, a tear slid down his cheek and dropped to the floor, making him sniffle.

There was nothing you wanted more than to pull him into your arms, cry into his shoulder, but you couldn’t. It hurt too much. You stepped back and slammed the door on him for the final time.

Leaning your head against the door, all of your emotions spilled out. You were silently crying, the ache in your chest almost too much to bear. You thought you heard your name outside the door, whispered just loud enough for you to hear, but you just sank down to the floor and let the tears fall.

On the other side of the door, Kenma’s phone buzzed. It was a text from her, and the disgust and anger that filled his stomach at the sight was enough for him to know he’d never forgive himself for hurting you like this.

“I love you.”

a/n: srry for the anticlimatic ending i was just feeling super bad and not in the mood to write but i wanted to get this out here, hope you like it.

#kenma kuzome #kenma x y/n #kenma x reader #haikyuu angst #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x y/n #kozume kenma #kenma angst #angst #kozume angst #kuroo tetsurou #kuroo #kozume

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