pluviophile0007

[pluviophile0007]

.

i'm so confused. i thought i was ready for this. for a relationship. it has been six years since my last one, i'm used to being alone. and i am content on my own. i think i feel happy when i'm with him. i laugh a lot, he's complimenting me on a daily basis, it seems like a healthy normal relationship. but, there's still something. something holding me back, something in the back of my mind. what if i'm just trying to be the girl he wants, what if i'm idolizing him and not seeing him for who he really is. what if i'm just so desperate for someone to be interested in me, to love me and care for me that i just jumped after the first occasion i got.

maybe i don't feel seen by him. i think he thinks he sees me for who i really am, that he understands me, but we're so different from each other, we have such different personalities but we're still kinda similar. 

i don't know. i'm scared and confused. and i'm not sure if my feelings are correct and i should end this. or if i'm overthinking this and my trauma is getting the best of me, and i should just go with our flow.

i'm so so scared. to get hurt. to be seen. to not be enough. 

[pluviophile0007]

i don’t know how he feels about me. i don’t know if he actually likes me. i don’t know where do we stand.

and it kills me.

[pluviophile0007]

i’m kinda happy rn

#Spotify

[pluviophile0007]

#love is a dog from hell #charles bukowski

[pluviophile0007]

ask me how i'm doin', i say “okay,”

but ain't that what we all say?

#ifyouwantlove #nf #songlyrics #song #lyrics #feelings #okay

[pluviophile0007]

#sadtruth #sad #truth #faking #fake #women #men #wordporn

[pluviophile0007]

i'm feeling so damn hollow the past few weeks. it's killing me.

[pluviophile0007]

[pluviophile0007]

‪I won't kiss anyone or have sex with anyone if I'm not drunk.‬

‪That's how much I don't like myself when I'm sober.‬

[pluviophile0007]

Few days before graduation exams and this is what keeps me from nervous breakdown.

Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.

[pluviophile0007]

#perry poetry #poetry #love #life #present #present moment #moment #live in the moment

[pluviophile0007]

#perry poetry #poetry #love #relationship #life

[pluviophile0007]

#lol #meme #dankmemes #funny memes #funny #death jokes #sleep

[pluviophile0007]

#meme #funny #text #texting

[pluviophile0007]

I feel lost

I don't know what I want or who I am these days.. I'm trying to figure it out but I fail every time. I'm trying to cover my loneliness with passionate sex with strangers I just met... I'm just partying at club, flirt with someone handsome and then we go to his place and the passion just absorbs me completely. Like I wanted to feel something so badly that I'll grab every opportunity that comes along. It feels like every time I do this I just feel more lost than before. I'm going further.

#feelings #lost #myself #confused #confession

[pluviophile0007]

#poems #picture quotes #poetry #quote #life quotes #life goals

[pluviophile0007]

#quote #emotions #deep #thoughts #life #poems #poetry #truth #love