poetrybypinal

[poetrybypinal]

“im warming myself up to say ‘i love you’ today.”

it shouldn’t take much more than some practice in front of a mirror, right? a couple times to my own reflection, then a couple more with my eyes closed, pretending the presence in front of me is yours. it isn’t meant to be anything harder than that. words don’t just catch themselves in your throat the way they do mine. i said it last night, and what must have been a million times again after that. but it’s a new day and the sunlight on our skin this morning is fresh, so i’m finding myself coughing up the vowels to make an ugly sound that you’ll tell me is the most beautiful thing you’ve ever heard. it’s so easy to love, but, god, it’s so hard to be in love.

#loving is not easy #poetry #poem #poetic #spilled poetry #poet #spilled ink #spilled thoughts #love #poems on tumblr #prose #thoughts #love poem #wholesome #anxiety #ow lol

[poetrybypinal]

“We just got to accept that some people can only be in our hearts, not in our lives.”

— Kathy B.

#Kathy B. #motivation #quotes #poetry #literature #relationship quotes #writing #original #words #love #relationship #thoughts #lit #prose #spilled ink #inspiring quotes #life quotes #quoteoftheday #love quotes #poem #aesthetic #🍃

[poetrybypinal]

i'm too old, can you remind me why we stopped talking? the days are getting shorter again - i wake up before the sun, i finish work after she has already hidden again.

i saw you got a dog - i think. i saw you dyed your hair - maybe. i saw that you like the same television series i do - well, it seems. anything could be happening, i guess. it's hard to tell just looking at a screen.

i'm too old - why did we fight? i can't remember what exactly happened. i can't remember what came up. i've been getting better. i'm sorry, if it's my fault. i'm sorry even if it's not. i'm sorry even if neither of us did anything wrong.

someone mentioned you the other day, and asked me - do you know her? as if we'd never even been friends. i had to think about it. no, i guess not. i once cried on your shoulder for half an hour about a boy who wasn't even, like, hot.

for old time's sake, wanna come over? it's halloween. it used to be our season. we used to clomp through the leaves together. wanna come over? i just moved, i want to show you my tiny skein of a yard. wanna come over? my dog can meet your maybe-dog and we can drink mulled cider and get over the hard part.

i dont remember who drew the line. i don't remember if there was even a line ever drawn, or we just grew apart, the way adults sometimes do. i think to text you sometimes - but what if you're angry?

you used to come to my birthday parties. i used to throw parties for you. it's kind of hard to picture, these days, as if through a fogged windowpane. a lot has happened since then. a lot has changed for me. probably for you too.

i can't write today. i wasn't ever really good at writing for you, specifically, anyway. i felt something too mottled. something that scalded if it wasn't handled properly.

anyway. i'm too old. i hope you reach out. i am glad you look happy. i am glad that i'm happy too. i am glad we are both busy adults with our lives sparkling like glitter glue. i am glad like ice cream dinners and theme park tickets and closing a book. i am glad to my roots.

but i kind of wish you were here so i could share it with you.

#🍃 #time #it was probably my fault tbh

[poetrybypinal]

i am stressed—come back into my life so that i may reteach myself the art of poetry

#sigh #i do miss you #god get a Grip . #i rly forgot #how to write poetry tho #whew

[poetrybypinal]

opened so many old wounds a few days ago nd thought i wld b ok bc they were from so long ago .. the second hand still goes round but god how the hour hand catches up

#all time ever does is pass and all i ever do is remember #time #sigh #i still think abt him #so much

[poetrybypinal]

If I could be any age,

I’d be the heartbeat just before the butter melts, where everything is soft and easy, a cookbook for a sacred life. And when I’m desperate for spices, I go to the bodega to buy love,

but the owner gives me wine and a new pen, says, This is probably better—and how can I argue? I had forgotten to pack a lunch, forgotten how much I ache for anyone to rest their words against my lips.

— Kelli Russell Agodon, from “Lightvessel”

#when i’m desperate for spices i go to the bodega to buy love #ohhhhhhhh #sigh #🍃

[poetrybypinal]

there is not a single day i don't think about this quote in relation to tragedies

#you have fought valiantly but in vain #maybe this is the reason of catharsis #🍃

[poetrybypinal]

gonna start spam posting on my blog i think. i want someone to find this page nd scroll thru it when they miss me thinking i won’t know they were ever here when all along this page has been filled w love letters to u from me nd feelings u hv given me. i will go to sleep but i am still thinking abt u scrolling thru my blog when i disappear for a while gn

#zzz #i will go to sleep and dream #not bc i am happy #but bc i am desperate #for better days #fr tho shld i start posting #just thoughts or smth #i’ve always wanted to #nobody reads this stuff anyway #zzzzzzz

[poetrybypinal]

We meet at a coffee shop. So much time has passed and who is time? Who is waiting by the windowsill? We make plans to go to a museum but we go to a bookshop instead. We’re leaning in, learning how to talk to each other again. I say, I’m obsessed with my grief and she says, I’m always in mourning. She laughs and it’s an extension of her body. She laughs and it moves the whole room. I say, My home is an extension of my body and she says, Most days are better with a long walk. The world moves without us—so we tend to a garden, a graveyard, a pot on the windowsill. Death is a comfort because it says, Transform but don’t hurry. There is a tenderness to growing older and we are listening for it. Steadier ways to move through the world and we are learning them. A way to touch your own body. A touch that says, Dig deeper. There, in the ground, there is our memory. I am near enough my roots. Time is my friend. Tomorrow is a place we are together.

— Sanna Wani, “Tomorrow is a Place”

#there is a tenderness to growing older and we are listening for it... #poetry #spilled ink #words

[poetrybypinal]

“But I must admit I miss you terribly. The world is too quiet without you nearby.”

— Lemony Snicket

#sigh #🍃

[poetrybypinal]

““Do you ever wonder why mortals seek love so fervently?” asks Hermes, filling his goblet with more of Dionysus’ best wine. Dionysus is thinking of Ariadne again as he smiles sadly, “They walk through life only two steps ahead of death. Imagine what it must be like to know you are finite. You would constantly seek the beauty of love too, if you knew you were doomed. If you knew how your book ends, wouldn’t you want to fill it with beautiful things like love, too?””

— Nikita Gill, Excerpts from Maidens, Myths and Monsters

#spilled ink #myth poem #greek mythology #greek myths #dionysus #ariadne #poetry #words

[poetrybypinal]

so i sit, cold hands and cold feet, cold heart and cold veins, cold lips and your warm name

#el oh el #i hate tht i still miss u #every love poem i write #has memories of u #laced in every word #fuck u #poetry #literature #spilled poetry #spilled thoughts

[poetrybypinal]

hey do you have any poems on falling in love but feeling scared/ hesitant?

hi anon! here are some poems for you. enjoy reading!

Mary Oliver, “Dogfish” | Also I wanted / to be able to love. And we all know / how that one goes, / don't we?

Richard Siken, “Self Portrait against Red Wallpaper” | The world doesn't know / what to do with my love. Because it isn't used to / being loved.

Chen Chen, “Race to the Tree” | Seeing you run so beautifully / on the track that afternoon, I wanted you / to suffocate, breath-starved from all the miles / you’d run away from me.

Hala Alyan, “Interactive :: House Saints” | It is not enough / to say love in Arabic. / You must say / be the thing that buries me

Louise Glück, “A Myth of Devotion” | He wants to say I love you, nothing can hurt you / but he thinks / this is a lie

Anne Carson, “Plainwater” (excerpt) | I: Do you dream of her / M: No I dream of headlights soaking through the fog on a cold spring night

Maggie Smith, “What I Carried” | I carried my fear of the world / and my love for the world. / I carried my terrible awe.

#🍃

[poetrybypinal]

Maybe it's time to take a rest, and stop chasing after people, who never even took their time to glance back at you. Maybe it's time to see what's best within yourself—not only in anybody else.

When will you give yourself a chance? //ma.c.a

[poetrybypinal]

"But if I couldn't get love..." she said, "...please let me have peace, instead."

I should stop running in circles // ma.c.a

#🍃

[poetrybypinal]

13 things i learned in 2020

nothing stays the same. without a moment's notice, everything can change and leave you wondering what the hell happened. living in the present and appreciating the small things is important because nothing else is guaranteed or permanent.

we humans are not as important as we believe ourselves to be. when the bee dies so do the flowers. when we die the flowers grow back. if we are to build a better future, we must give back to the planet by changing the ways we live on it.

time is not real. there is nothing in the laws of physics that can prove it is anything other than a human construct.

power of the people will always outweigh the people in power. the 1% are scared of us realising this and acting upon it.

home is more of a person than a place. the way i see my family has changed. all that other stuff i thought i wanted when the true treasure was here all along.

distance does not lessen the value or strength of true friendship.

self-care is by far the most important skill to learn in life. being aware of my needs, how things effect me, and eliminating harmful inputs has gone a long way in improving my physical and mental health.

social media does not offer an honest or healthy way in which to view the world. like a toxic friend, it uses our desires and insecurities in all sorts of manipulative ways. being able to take a step back and reconnect with the real physical world can be both invigorating and revelatory.

simple acts of kindness cost nothing but are as precious as gold dust.

eye contact has become a new form of communication. with masks hiding half of our faces we have no choice but to look at each other's souls. we see each other more now and we offer strangers in the street smiles from our eyes rather than our mouths.

being lonely doesn't mean we're alone. everyone is going through something. even if they don't show it.

laughter is the closest thing there is to magic. watery eyes, burning chests and aching ribs from laughing too much are the most wonderful feelings in the world.

i am much more resilient and capable than i thought i was.

#time

[poetrybypinal]

“I shouldn’t have written to you tonight, by the way, and I’ll take this letter back in the morning. But I felt a heart so full of memories and desires, so agitated by you, that I had to talk to you a little, as I would like to do, lips to lips, sometimes detaching myself to look at your wonderful face of consent. Ah, my darling, how I need only one sign from you to live.”

— Albert Camus to Maria Casarès, Correspondance, September 10-11, 1949 [#89]  

#🍃 #ow lol