No it didn’t

Criminals misidentified

Unlikely. I see no oil covered donuts.

would you rather be abducted by aliens or a cryptid?

I feel like aliens would at least anesthetize me before they killed me, but on the other hand, I'd love to die the way I lived: having an asthma attack in a tree.

i hate when people ask me what sign i am like bitch i’m a sign from god. start running.

Blessed

🐝 get jet-lagged. I repeat: bees get jet-lagged.

I knew I should've turned at Albuquerque...

The Eternal Bunny Dilemma

Political parties and the illusion of choice.

My wizard breasts boobily bouncing.

*stumbling down my tower steps with my wizard breasts bouncing*

Why is this a universal thing they do to kids? 😂

1976 kindergarten: I was the only one in my class to cast a (secret) ballot for Regan. No idea why. (side note: I ended up being the first person in my family to actually vote in real elections) But damn, do I remember denying being the ONLY ONE who did it!

The teacher was so upset one of us was lying- there was ONE VOTE for Regan? Who did it?

Me: *looks around room pretending to find the guilty party*

How tf are you going for hold a 7 year old accountable for their political actions?

dude being a little kid during an election year was THE funniest thing. kids were all just repeating their parent’s political beliefs verbatim without understanding any of what they were saying. My elementary school did a mock election and I didn’t know what was going on so I just voted for Obama because thats what everyone else was doing. My friend and I were chatting on a swing set and she said to me “I hope Mitt Romney gets elected because I don’t think Obama will get anything done” bitch you are 9

D.A.V.E.’s childhood home movies! And we thought they were destroyed during the banana incident!

Salutations. Child of the Future. 1966.

Internet Archive

Johnny has three pieces of paper, and he rips one.

Anyway, he still has three pieces of paper, but the room smells now.

Virgil Finlay