punkscowardschampions

[punkscowardschampions]

#inspo #rio cavante

[punkscowardschampions]

Ruster pt.1

Rio: Morning

Rio: I won’t take up another whole day but I would like to talk to you

Buster: Okay, talk

Rio: I didn’t mean to do such a 180, I read that bit back and I don’t blame you for having whiplash

Buster: Apology accepted, not that you have

Rio: I wasn’t trying to flip but it seemed worse because every time we were about to talk we’d just distract ourselves instead

Buster: You make it sound like we didn’t do any talking that wasn’t dirty

Rio: We did some but it was outweighed, we can admit that

Buster: Because the point was distracting you

Rio: I don’t think I should be distracted, that it’s a good idea or fair on you or anyone else

Buster: Which is exactly why you should be, but I’ve told you that already

Rio: It just makes you a fantasy held up against my real life, which isn’t going anywhere

Buster: I am, and escapism isn’t a crime against your real life

Rio: Is that what you want?

Buster: I want to give you as much happiness as I can, however fleeting it is right now

Buster: I’m not going anywhere either

Rio: I’d rather this was real and less happy than a fantasy, I guess that’s the gist of what I was trying to say

Buster: It is real, that’s what I’ve been saying

Rio: If we start contradicting ourselves again this is going to be confusing

Buster: I haven’t contradicted myself

Rio: Babe, you definitely did

Buster: How?

Rio: You said you’re a fantasy and then you said you’re real

Buster: You do fantasise about me and I can fulfil any you have, that doesn’t mean my feelings for you aren’t real

Rio: You love a technicality, okay

Buster: Both are true, I’m your fantasy and your reality

Rio: All I want is to be a little more practical, not blur the lines

Buster: Who do you know who’s more practical than me?

Buster: Everything I’ve offered you is feasible, and what I’ve said I plan to do

Rio: But it’s so far away

Rio: we should enjoy now, if we’re doing this

Buster: I was, I thought you were too

Rio: Of course I was

Rio: You get what I’m saying

Buster: Not really, we’ve been enjoying the now since I invited you to the party

Rio: Think about how much we’ve talked about the future, or the past 

Buster: We’ve talked about my birthday loads as well, the present

Rio: Let’s do more of that

Buster: It’ll be happening soon, we’ll be experiencing it

Rio: You still want me to come?

Buster: Of course

Rio: Don’t of course me like we didn’t leave things like last night

Buster: Last night wouldn’t uninvite you, it doesn’t undo everything

Rio: That’s how it felt

Buster: I didn’t leave you, I left the conversation

Rio: I know you hate being scared but I can’t pretend I’m not

Buster: You’re allowed to be, you’re not me

Rio: You can admit you are

Buster: In the present, there’s nothing for me to be scared of, it’s my birthday

Rio: You know how fucked we’d be, if your sister saw or suspected anything

Rio: and you’re not nervous at all? Or what if we get in person and everything is just painfully awkward?

Buster: She won’t and we aren’t going to be, I know her and I know us

Rio: I want to have that kind of faith

Buster: We’ve seen her drink and we’ve already seen each other cum, that’s believing

Rio: It is too late to go back to before, we can’t pretend nothing happened

Buster: I don’t want to, no matter what

Rio: Me either

Buster: As far as I’m concerned, that’s the only right track

Rio: What’s our plan? After your party, long term short term, if that makes sense

Buster: You need to ask whether or not you can stay for half term, if you still want to

Buster: otherwise, we’ll finalise our plans to see each other for your birthday

Rio: I asked, when I went and got water

Buster: And?

Rio: I told you she’d say yes, said it sounded like a great idea 

Buster: What do you think?

Rio: I think I can check in with the girls, if it sounds like I need to come back early then I can but if not, yeah

Rio: I want to have a real visit, not a fly-by

Buster: I want that for you, a short visit is more likely to add stress than relieve it

Rio: And you still want to spend time with me, yeah?

Buster: As much as I can

Rio: As much as you’re able to be excited now or as much time

Rio: Can we walk it back a few steps so it’s good again

Buster: Time, obviously 

Buster: Who do you think I am that I’d throw in the towel as quickly as you’re telling me I took things too far?

Rio: No, it was a mutual effort, I didn’t say you took things too far, we got carried away

Rio: but I don’t want you to throw the towel in, I still want you to want this, for what it is 

Buster: Whatever this is, I want you for who you are

Rio: There is no one else, I can only want you 

Rio: We owe ourselves the chance, to try, to make it work

Buster: Ourselves and each other

Rio: Right

Rio: It’s a deal

Buster: We’ll make it work

Rio: I believe that

Buster: Good

Rio: Do you want to go for breakfast when I get there? My treat

Rio: Even if your sister has to tag along with us, it won’t be totally unbearable, promise

Buster: It’s a date

Buster: which means I’ll pay

Rio: We’re not doing 50/50?

Buster: You promised it wouldn’t be unbearable

Rio: Why are you so cute?

Buster: You’ve watched my workout

Rio: Your personality is better, somehow

Buster: I’ve been taught sufficient manners to foot the bill, that’s all

Rio: And you think I’m poor

Buster: Wrong twin, you’re her poor relation, you’re my girlfriend

Rio: One of, there’s too many of us for it to be a me problem

Buster: Don’t start an argument with me about money and there isn’t a problem

Rio: I’m not, I’m trying my best to be friends again

Buster: Trying your best implies I’m difficult to be friends with, what happened to liking my personality a few sentences ago?

Rio: I mean you’re playing hard to get still

Buster: I am? You friend zoned me there

Rio: Don’t you wanna be friends with me?

Buster: You don’t want to be in the same category as my friends, you know what they’re like

Rio: I’m the best you have, obviously

Rio: They can aspire to my level not drag me down

Buster: They’ll never get anywhere near your level, you’re on one all of your own

Rio: I barely slept

Buster: You don’t need beauty sleep, as long as you can function through today, on autopilot if necessary, you’ll be fine

Rio: I can’t stand how we left things

Buster: Me either, but we’ve resolved things now

Rio: Let’s fix things if we have to fight, always

Rio: I don’t care how long it takes

Buster: I swear

Buster: I love arguing but not like that

Rio: You love being right

Buster: I don’t have anything to prove with you though

Rio: If you’re going to do it all day for a living, do you really want to come home and do more of the same, like

Buster: No talk of the future, remember

Rio: Oh, right

Rio: we’ll still know each other though, whatever the future brings, no spoilers there

Buster: We’re still unavoidably related, no one’s going to let us forget that

Rio: I don’t want to divorce myself from being your family

Rio: inconvenient as it is in a lot of ways

Buster: You are regardless, we can’t change the fact

Rio: But I’m telling you I wouldn’t

Rio: We’re blood and that means I can always have your back, that’s more important than the things I want

Buster: You may not want to fight but I have to beg to differ, what you want is the most important thing

Rio: Nothing is more important than you being happy

Rio: both of us

Buster: That is what you want

Rio: Touche 

Rio: you’ve got me there

Buster: I’m captain of the debate team for a reason, babe

Rio: I can’t believe your school actually has a debate team

Buster: [tell her about the even posher and wilder clubs your school has, idk because I didn’t go to a fancy school but she’ll lol]

Rio: You may as well live on the other side of the world with how different your life is, honestly

Rio: I actually have no idea what clubs this place has, if it has any

Buster: Tell me about it

Rio: I guess Harvard needs to know you’re a master debater

Buster: No offence, but I’ll probably phrase it slightly differently on my application, in case that autocorrects to something else

Rio: Good thinking, babe

Buster: I’m full of good ideas, I keep telling you

Buster: which is why you should listen to me and go back to sleep for a while

Rio: I can’t, there’s too much to do

Buster: What couldn’t wait 20 minutes?

Rio: You’re not going to go back to bed

Buster: I’d go back to bed with you, were that possible

Rio: I want to be anywhere with you so badly

Buster: Promise to nap and I’ll stay on the phone with you to make sure you don’t oversleep 

Rio: You’ll be bored without me

Buster: You’ll be exhausted without this

Rio: You don’t need to worry about me

Rio: I’d rather be with you

Buster: You will be with me, I’ll be watching you sleep

Rio: 😳

Buster: See, stop fighting it, it’ll be nice

Rio: Providing I don’t drool or snore, sure

Buster: Shh, give in to me and you’ll feel so much better

Rio: Damn, okay, okay

Buster: Good girl

Rio: I thought you wanted me tired, you can’t just call me that

Buster: You are tired, I want you to lie down and get comfortable

Rio: [send him the photographic proof, obviously]

Rio: What’s next?

Buster: [tell her to get whatever childhood toy from whatever shelf like oh I almost forgot you clearly need them to be able to sleep]

Rio: You missed [this teddy bears name] too 

Rio: [video of it waving like a nerd]

Buster: I miss you more

Buster: [and ring her up so you can oversee this nap and make sure she doesn’t sleep too long cos you both have shit to do esp if it is a school day]

Rio: [You can’t get carried away today, which, good luck with that lol but anyway wave at this boy yourself, not at all casually trying to silently read his face to see if he’s really okay/you’re really okay, laying down and resting on your elbow ‘daddy?’ Quietly and so softly !!]]

Buster: [smile at her when she waves at you because adorable but you’re likewise trying to gauge how she is, including but not remotely limited to how tired, while trying not to give anything away yourself because you’re that bitch always, gesturing for her to get properly comfy again like in the pic she sent]

Rio: [raising your brows and smiling back at him like hmm when he doesn’t say anything because two can play at this miming game, boy, laying down still but gesturing like you too]

Buster: [pulling the kind of face you would when you’re a father and your child is sassing you but he is nevertheless also laying down, in more of a lounging against the headboard Junie in her soft office kinda position though rather than a sleepy pose ‘close your eyes’]

Rio: [laughing softly at his face, the incredulous what? not needing to be spoken because your innocent face says it all for you ‘but I don’t want to’ so sincerely in contrast to the bants of it all]

Buster: [‘you want what I want’ because it’s their catchphrase but also he genuinely does want her to take this nap and she wants to please him, so a sincere daddy voice]

Rio: [pouting but setting your phone up on the pillow next to you so you can close your eyes and do what he wants]

Buster: [make a noise that’s like the non-verbal equivalent of good girl so she knows he’s pleased with her for doing what she’s told ‘now go to sleep’ still in a daddy tone but a softer one, like a loving father]

Rio: [doing a big sigh for both reasons you could and would, relaxing and showing frustration ‘didn’t you miss me?’]

Buster: [‘I already told you’ because he said I miss you more before he called so it’s not just giving shh go to sleep]

Rio: [‘say it again’ sassily but also we mean it so the !! is serious]

Buster: [‘say please’ couldn’t mean that more either, manners as v important and so are the daddy vibes always]

Rio: [‘I can’t’ very like I’m sorry I would if I could alas]

Buster: [‘yes you can’]

Rio: [‘how will you know I mean it when my eyes are closed?’]

Buster: [‘because it’s important that you do mean it’ with the ultimate daddy energy of not wanting to be disappointed]

Rio: [‘of course I mean it, I want you to say it and mean it more than anything’ hugging this teddy to your chest]

Buster: [‘of course I’ve missed you more than anything’ because true and that’s obvious in his !! when he finally gives in and says this despite the fact she still hasn’t said please]

Rio: [SQUEEZING said teddy with some of the energy you’re not throwing out with the NOISE you manage to keep lil whilst still being the most !! ‘it was like I’d never gone a night without you’ even though the opposite is obviously true, out here struggling and not okay about it]

Buster: [‘you don’t have to spend another without me’ because never gonna go to bed angry again is what they’ve already promised even though I know damn well you can’t stick to that forever sir]

Rio: [‘no matter where we are, what we’re doing’ opening your eyes again because emphasis and you just want to look at him too ‘I’ll be your goodnight’]

Buster: [his breathing changing slightly when she opens her eyes in such a small but nevertheless very noticeable way that’s totally involuntary and would be the equivalent of a gasp if he’d let it be like omg there she is, exactly like when he saw her on screen for the first time during their first phone call moment ‘even if I’m in America and you’re not’ because a big time difference potentially but also a feasible somewhere he could be without her especially if he ended up doing that year there at school which puts him off applying to harvard as we did once before, because even if he doesn’t go in this version, it can still be something his school offers and he knows exists hence using it as an example to promise with ‘I’ll always say goodnight back’]

Rio: [the immediate heart eyes and looking down as you blush only to have to keep looking at him, bye, moving closer to your phone instinctively ‘are you going to live in a frat house, do that whole thing?’ just imagining what his life would look like in America]

Buster: [‘these are questions you could be dreaming the answers to’ but he’s more playful about the fact she should be asleep and isn’t rather than giving angry dad go to sleep rn vibes about it because her heart eyes and blush were too cute and he isn’t over them]

Rio: [do an I know, I know kind of smile and roll your eyes to look at him again ‘I don’t know if it’d be dreaming when I think about all the chances I’ll have to be jealous’ because with fraternities comes sororities and we’re also thinking about that of course]

Buster: [‘you like being jealous’ because she said about it being a fantasy of hers and something she wanted him to do at this party and he obvs remembers that]

Rio: [‘the flight could be longer’ with a shrug, like it’s feasible for you to fly over to do something about being jealous at a drop of a hat when it is not but we’re not trying to get in a bad mood about this hypothetical]

Buster: [‘at least it’ll make the one to london feel shorter still’ because it already is a ridiculously short flight anyway so in comparison, blink and you’re there, as a reminder that she is coming here soon in case either of them could forget]

Rio: [‘and you’re already bored of the girls you know there’ because we know competition is not being brought by you ladies truly, speaking of we may as well make it a school day even if it’s the last before half-term because why not ‘I can dream about you all day’ because we’re only in school to not get our mother in shit, I am sure precisely 0 work is being done when you’re still so in this Edie drama and worried about everything]

Buster: [a nod because he is bored of all these girls we all know it that gets more emphatic at the suggestion of her daydreaming about him all day though because love that and the chelsea girls nod was more dismissive ‘you should’ there’s an unspoken starting now but again he isn’t being pushy about her going to sleep rn because happy that y’all are talking properly]

Rio: [‘you do look good in your uniform’ because I’m sure you’ve seen it at some point on social media over the years as you both stalk each other, doing a wistful sigh about it]

Buster: [‘if I put it on for you right now, you have to take your nap immediately after’ because not above bribery especially when he will have to get dressed eventually anyway]

Rio: [‘kind of feel like a massive pervert but-’ nodding as you laugh because you aren’t above this and you aren’t going to pretend it]

Buster: [no hesitation in doing the most to put this uniform on for her and only flashing her in a teasing way instead of fully being here naked during the switch over, gotta leave some parts of himself yet to be discovered or where’s the fun in that, we love a slutty little show though and like his shower antics he’s giving it all in a way that most lads will not so]

Rio: [OBSESSED with it in a way he will be able to tell is so genuine and not in the least bit forced or even slightly piss-taking, we just love it and love to see it, sitting up fully and holding your phone in your hands to watch him properly, here biting the inside of our mouth hard to not be loud af with our encouragement like we wanna]

Buster: [‘don’t’ practically as a whisper when he can clearly tell that she’s biting the inside of her mouth, though not purely because he wants her to be loud, af even if we all know he do want that too, hence adding ‘you’ll hurt yourself’]

Rio: [‘I have to’ whispered back mainly for effect because you don’t need to be that quiet when the household is getting ready for school but you also want to because ‘I owe you some blood’]

Buster: [‘baby’ with all the feeling and !! because that’s as much as he can bring himself to protest when she’s being so hot about it, also he has yet to say it despite all the blatant daddy energy he’s been bringing this entire time]

Rio: [stopping biting your mouth as if he asked you to with that but really you have to do your own GASP of an intake of breath ‘I’m going to miss you more today’ like last night isn’t even gonna register with how badly we cba to leave this bed now]

Buster: [‘that, you have to do’ because we need her to miss us that much when it’s clearly this mutual, emphasising that unnecessarily with the eye contact he is making and holding while he gets dressed into this uniform]

Rio: [‘it could be worse’ all the implications of him missing you too and knowing the other is still there and not off living their best life]

Buster: [‘it has been, but we aren’t dwelling on the worst case scenarios’ and doing some kind of hot move during his grwm to emphasise that too because will always at least try and distract her from all the bad stuff, he can’t not]

Rio: [‘you’d be a great stripper’ as an actual compliment in the way only you could ‘too bad about your big brain’]

Buster: [a hot but quiet lol because not trying to do a big Fearghal style one and wake Nancy up when I doubt she is already the lazy cow haha, then smirking at her in that way when he’s 100% serious about knowing he’s good at everything he does to the point it doesn’t need to be verbally said]

Rio: [she is 100% snoozing and we all know it, turning up late and half asleep always lmao anyways, this girl smirking back at him and shaking her head before looking towards her wardrobe because you have to think about getting ready too ‘what lessons do you have today?’ still looking in the distance because can’t be stressed how much going to school would suck for all y’all right now and we can pretend we’re joining him instead rather than confront that inescapable fact]

Buster: [for that reason, because duh you’d know it would suck and what she’s trying to do, tell her about your impending day in so much detail, not just what lessons you have but the after school clubs and how you’re going to spend your lunch break etc everything you can possibly share with her, which thankfully is a lot because you constantly keep such a full schedule]

Rio: [lowkey shook even though you know he’s this boy ‘when are we going to see each other?’ like you are there and want to know where you fit into this busy schedule]

Buster: [make a point to fit her in every plausible second of this day you can as if she was there, giving in the hallway between lessons, together in lessons you have which are the same at your respective schools, having lunch together, her cheering him on for each of his extracurriculars, all those possible vibes for her to dream/daydream about] 

Rio: [get up from your bed and start getting ready because encouragement you needed and you’re gonna let him know it’s working as much as it can via this ‘you’re so nice to me’ with all the sincerity, lowkey 🥺 but not full force at him as you’re probably doing something with your hair or whatever]

Buster: [watching her do this and giving her a LOOK which screams I’m proud of you with all the !! because he really is, not just in a daddy way ‘you’re easy to be nice to’ with all the sincerity but also continued good girl energy for how well behaved she is]

Rio: [‘You know how much I appreciate everything, don’t you?’ because you’re fully aware how 0-100 this has unavoidably been you’re not delusional ‘how much I like you’]

Buster: [‘yeah’ because he do, no notes, hence there’s nothing casual about the way he’s saying it to make sure she knows he isn’t just saying it]

Rio: [‘good’ as uncasually and throwing in a likewise !! LOOK to really confirm it]

Buster: [echoing her ‘good’ as he makes insane EYE CONTACT because it is but also she looks it and she is still behaving it, all the meanings]

Rio: [shifting to cross your legs and uncross them because you really don’t want to behave but you are still trying your damnedest ‘I can’t wait to be next to you’] 

Buster: [shifting closer to the screen himself as involuntarily as if that means he will be closer to her rn and could reach out and touch her like he wants, biting his lip gently but it’s nevertheless a throwback to how ferally he bit it before as well as drawing attention to said lip and whatever damage there is as a result as he gives her an updated countdown of when she will be]

Rio: [‘you’ll have to try extra hard not to get punched in the face’ like your lip will bust open at the slightest of provocation now, literally reaching our fingers out to stroke his face on the screen]

Buster: [‘they’ll have to harder to punch me in the face’ because a correction that obviously needs to be made however distracted he may be, we love to pretend that we never get punched lol, but there is also a genuine don’t worry about me vibe there, running his tongue over his lip like we all know she’d be touching it rn if she physically could, v gently]

Rio: [‘I’ll distract them’ shaking our head like they better not touch your face and we all remember the cheerleader outfit and how genuinely distracting that would be for anyone/everyone lol so true bestie]

Buster: [give her the updates on that cheerleading outfit like if you’ve had shipping info etc overnight which is likely so we’re all painfully aware that this will arrive while she’s there since she’s deffo staying for half term hols too, because we’re THINKING hard about exactly how she’ll look in that rn and we cannot wait]

Rio: [doing an excited little shake because truly can’t wait and we’re running out of ways to verbalise it ‘I love dressing up for you’ because we remember what he said about your party costume]

Buster: [‘so get dressed’ as if this uniform is a costume too and not just what she’s being forced to wear for school because the fantasy is better than the reality yet again with how much her school day will suck and how much he wants his own over with to get closer to this party and seeing her]

Rio: [smile at him in recognition of what he’s doing but also shamelessly about it still of course so start your own show for him like he did you]

Buster: [not even making a NOISE to encourage her he just can’t help but do it, and we all know that it’s even more !! for the fact he’s trying to be quiet but never can]

Rio: [we love your inability to shut up boy and never more clear when we involuntarily volley a NOISE response back at you like that, gently biting your lip in the same spot as he has well after the fact because clearly not sorry about it]

Buster: [‘you didn’t sleep’ shamelessly putting it out there that by that logic and with a LOOK that she has the 20-30 min nap window to do something else and we all know what that is, because can’t be tamed and he’s likewise not soz]

Rio: [smirking as you silently shake your head and slowly push your body up so he can see you taking your underwear off from under your skirt]

Buster: [WATCH her do this and let out the kind of quiet moan that makes it seem like she’s undressing him rather than herself because how about it he is, always extra, always encouraging her to be as extra as he is and always hyping her up]

Rio: [‘we shouldn’t’ said with clearly 0 intention of stopping this or wanting that because should doesn’t mean could I’m afraid, that but doesn’t need vocalising]

Buster: [‘I should’ and with 0 hesitation, instructing her on how to touch herself exactly how he would do it if he were there in such graphic detail and changing things up in synch to her every reaction as if this is really him irl, his voice sounding like he’s doing all these things to her himself and he’s as affected as he would be cos duh, ofc at some point telling her to put the underwear she took off in her mouth just to do it and be feral as yet another hot move cos even though it will keep her a bit quieter, as my boo said earlier she doesn’t really to worry about that when her fam lives in the middle of nowhere and therefore everyone’s probably already up and getting ready for school, ANYWAY, also blatantly at some point also telling her to put her fingers in her mouth and again instructing her exactly how because he NEEDS to taste her, moaning her name as she does it in a way that would feel SO loud (even though it realistically isn’t) because of him literally bringing his mouth to this phone screen to do the most as if that act will mean he can actually eat her out rn immediately, nbd, all v chill and casual school day morning antics, nothing to see here]

Rio: [me thinking about the lowkey boring sex you have had so far in your life and dying at how blown away you are going to be even over the phone like this, here wondering if he’s been like this with any/everyone else or if this is just because it’s y’all but now is not the time to ask because you’re far too busy living it to truly be pondering beyond how it feels to hear him like this and how it literally feels following his instructions on yourself like this]

Buster: [we know that it’s just cos it’s y’all and that even if he’s worked his way around every girl in this clique by now none of them are slaying very hard lbr but she has no way to know that other than the clues he’s so far given and as my boo said in the here and now we’re just living in feral hours so not the priority instead his is saying ‘look what the taste of you has done to me’ as he pans this camera down to show her how turned on he is, because 1. He is but 2. It’s a good visual to keep for later when she’s having a terrible school day because unlike everyone else on the planet his school uniform fits him like a glove and is tailored perfectly to his body the same way everything he owns is, so nowhere to hide despite being fully clothed and that would be the case if he’s thinking about her too hard in lessons or wherever too]

Rio: [can’t even say anything because your mouth is still full so communicating EVERYTHING you need to via EYE CONTACT that is as indecent as how he looks in his uniform right now is, nbd the girls are wilding out, sad for your family but ultimately very grateful half your siblings aren’t here anymore so the risk of being caught has really been lowered and you can get away with how blatant this all is]

Buster: [Grace is the biggest problem as far as y’all getting caught because will not let Rio live until she is lowkey replaced by Nancy but we’re not letting you walk in on any of this sis, stay away doing your own cringe grwm please and thanks because he’s gotta maintain this eye contact as he finally starts to touch himself because has yet to, when she’d be able to hear it so shamelessly because of how quiet she is and how hard he is going but only hear it because we’re keeping that eye contact basically a closeup and very dramatic for a moment here]

Rio: [and that’s not yet thank god, bad enough when it is, not whilst the girl is only just in double digits tah ICK (though it kind of makes sense if Nancy is mining her for gossip right now but that’s obviously just humouring her online for it) ANYWAY with you two right now having a marvellous time WATCHING him with giant eyes as if you can see what you can hear because can imagine it all that vividly, absolutely having to touch yourself again about it, of course]

Buster: [you’re so welcome guys it’s a deserved way to start the day neither of you wanna spend at school apart and I know she’ll forgive me for the close up on his face rn considering the iconic facial expressions he’s bound to be giving while losing it here and the noises he’s making because can never shut up, even though it is the quietest he’s been so far because he is trying so hard to be]

Rio: [at least you can moan his name back for him now, even if you gotta give some consideration to volume, it’ll still feel like the LOUDEST thing because of how quiet she has been, so welcome for being back on good terms lads, it’ll make this time before you’re in person go a lot faster]

Buster: [the VISIBLE and AUDIBLE effects hearing his name will have on him in every possible way cannot be overstated, from breathing harder to clenching his jaw and trying to grit his teeth but his own moan in response still escaping anyway to his breathing getting heavier to the point he’s basically panting about it or the fact she’ll be able to hear he’s clearly going that much harder with how he’s touching himself, all of the above and heart eyes until he’s forced to close them I’m sure]

Rio: [‘I love how you do it’ like he’s doing something adorably wholesome and isn’t about to cum/make you too, heart eyes couldn’t be more accurate than in this moment ‘I missed you more’ because any chance to make it a competition must be taken]

Buster: [‘I love everything about you’ because he’s said it before but it bears repeating especially IRL in his indecent af breathless voice rn with all the !! as if that’s a competition too and he’s won by one-upping her ‘you couldn’t possibly miss me more’ because likewise, he misses her so much he also wins that]

Rio: [‘No, I couldn’t’ because caught you out in the verbal loophole and there is no more we could miss you than we do now, doing a giant grin at the phone even if you have to end up gritting those teeth about it]

Buster: [in the same vein doing an exasperated sigh at being caught out like oh you but it’s just turning into a dramatic one like the rest of his breathing and his ‘baby’ like earlier when he was likewise trying to protest/tell her off just fully a MOAN because we’re too lost in these antics]

Rio: [those heart eyes rolling in pleasure because cannot handle when he calls you that, will never be over it, even if you’re here asking ‘say it again’ like you can cope and aren’t dying]

Buster: [do say it again but adding a my in front of it this time to kill her more and because he’s dying as much about it all and simply must]

Rio: [nodding so dramatically it’s clearly helping you do the most because the point is so laboured beyond necessity here, especially when you’re repeating ‘I’m yours’ with it]

Buster: [mhmm, unnecessarily volleying back ‘you’re mine’ because can’t not even though the point has already been made here and many an other time because we’re so glad to be back]

Rio: [you can call him my daddy in the same vein and we can fast forward to when you’re going if we want at any point btw, as my boo has been wanting to do the party for an age now lol, won’t shut your mouths ever god bless]

Buster: [we did need to get y’all back on track first but we very much have lol lol so yeah we probably can fast forward soon cos we know what the vibe is, just wondering if there’s anything else we want/need to do before then]

Rio: [hmm, we might want to do some of your school day because so far you’ve been able to ignore your real life because it was just overnight energy? Idk]

Buster: [yeah that’s a good idea because no way to ignore your lives when school is hitting you over the head with a massive dose of reality]

Rio: [might not need to do a load but makes sense because y’all are gonna have to go soon is the vibe so may as well give a taste of that energy here when y’all have absolutely killed each other and really aren’t going to want to go anywhere lol]

Buster: [agreed it leads on well from where we are as a natural progression so why wouldn’t we, soz lads that you’re gonna hate it but that is your real lives hence he’s been obsessed with the future]

Rio: Miss me like I’ll miss you

Buster: I do and will, you know that

Rio: I know that this bus ride is much longer than yours will be

Buster: I’ll keep you company for the length of yours instead of mine though

Rio: You’re such a gentleman

Rio: Is there always drama and scandal on your buses or is that not posh enough?

Buster: There’s probably more drama and scandal, look at my sister, she’s a shining example of how much the posh kids adore it

Rio: Very true

Rio: I’m glad the girls aren’t at our school yet, nothings as serious in primary

Buster: Also very true, despite how deadly serious I’m sure it all feels

Rio: 🙄

Rio: Poor Ava could never be as dramatic as your other sister, however hard she tried

Buster: The bar has been set excessively high, thankfully

Rio: Arguably Eds has done just that too but would feel a bit callous to call it dramatics

Buster: We don’t need to, the situation is completely different, at polar ends of the scale anyone would argue

Rio: Do you think our younger siblings can learn from our mistakes though, be better off for them?

Buster: They have the option to, same as we had with learning from our parents’, whether they choose to or not is up for debate, especially if we use Nancy as an example yet again for our aforementioned chances

Buster: that said, I don’t doubt Ava will do better than even me

Rio: Okay, you redeemed yourself there

Rio: but really, it’s sweet, how you love her

Buster: She’s my little sister, of course I do

Rio: I know but you haven’t portrayed yourself as particularly family-oriented for a while now

Buster: She’s getting older, she’d hate me to be that embarrassing 

Rio: You know what I mean

Buster: You’re thinking of Nance and I, but what you need to remember is, we’re the exact same age, she’s a peer and she doesn’t measure up, the likelihood that she could hypothetically surpass me, or inspire cliched brotherly sentiments are non-existent

Rio: No, I know how you feel about Nance, I’m not confused, babe

Buster: As for taking the entire extended family under my wing, nobody’s heart is big enough

Rio: I was giving you a compliment, not calling you out

Rio: I know you were only acting like an arsehole, remember

Buster: Okay, I stand corrected, maybe your heart is

Rio: Nah, I don’t know about that

Buster: If anyone’s could be, it’s yours

Rio: Not anymore

Buster: It’s a muscle, and I know you’ve really been exercising it lately

Rio: Are you talking nerdy to me?

Buster: Barely, but if you want me to, just say so

Rio: Ain’t seen nothing yet, he says

Buster: And don’t you forget it, babe

Rio: You’re so good

Rio: I’d listen to you talk about anything

Buster: I’d sit with you in silence, which isn’t something I’d say to many other people

Rio: You don’t like silences, do you

Buster: I don’t mind yours, in the right context

Rio: You don’t mind how bad at it I am because of you, sure

Buster: You aren’t ever going to how mutual that is

Rio: I like talking to you, always have

Rio: knowing you’ve not taken that male vow of silence when it counts is encouraging

Buster: Good, because I like encouraging you, I always will

Rio: It’s another talent you possess 

Buster: It would take me every minute of your bus ride, at least, to list yours

Rio: Just wait

Rio: When I don’t have to be here, I can show you for real

Buster: I can’t wait

Rio: I’m so sick of it too

Buster: I already ache again

Rio: How are we meant to concentrate on anything else?

Buster: Because focusing on you fully is still [an updated countdown] away

Rio: Knowing that doesn’t change the feeling though

Buster: Nothing does, but if that’s the price for this, I’ll gladly pay it

Rio: Me too

Rio: I can’t live without the other feelings you give me

Buster: It would be almost impossible to live without you now

Rio: You’ll never have to so you can take away the almost, I promise

Buster: Never?

Rio: Never

Rio: You know that

Buster: In that case, delete the almost

Rio: Didn’t you know that?

Buster: Last night hardly proved it

Rio: Last night was a mistake

Buster: A mistake after [however long y’all had spent as a couple by that point]

Rio: Better now rather than a year down the line, surely

Rio: Or have you done all this before and know better?

Buster: You know the answer to that question

Rio: I can’t undo it, I’ve apologised, you accept that or you don’t

Buster: I’ve accepted it

Rio: Yeah?

Buster: Yeah

Rio: Good

Rio: don’t hold it against me

Buster: I don’t

Rio: You know I want you as much as I need you

Buster: We want and need the same things, that hasn’t changed overnight

Rio: Nothing has

Buster: Nothing could

Rio: I’m your baby, remember

Buster: Vividly

Rio: You’re not allowed to forget just because you have [whatever lessons he told you he did]

Buster: All the more reason to keep it every second of it in mind and you with me

Rio: You’re smart, you can cope with a little distraction

Buster: Like I said, we want and need the same things

Rio: I would still want you with me, even if there wasn’t bullshit to block out

Buster: It’s necessary no matter what

Rio: You should always know where I am and what I’m doing

Buster: Tell me, always

Rio: I want to feel you with me, your protection, all the time

Buster: Don’t you?

Rio: I felt you earlier, it’s easier when we’re alone together

Rio: but it won’t be too much work to remind me, will it?

Buster: No, but if it was hard work that wouldn’t put me off either

Rio: Another thing I like about you

Buster: Another thing to thank my parents for, if you can without giving yourself away

Rio: Of course I can, I’m nothing if not polite and friendly

Buster: That’s very easily provable and I dare you to

Rio: I’m not scared

Buster: Which is as provable as easily

Rio: I’ll wait, it wouldn’t be as enjoyable over text, plus, just bizarre 

Buster: We honestly don’t have long to, it only feels like forever because of how thoroughly I’m going to enjoy spending my birthday and half term with you

Rio: It wouldn’t feel like this if it wasn’t going to feel so right being together

Rio: like you said, a price to pay

Buster: Exactly

Rio: I didn’t say it’d be easy, just that we can do it

Buster: I’ve only just mentioned my work ethic as well, at risk of sounding ridiculously repetitive

Rio: There’s no helping how true it is

Rio: and maybe I’ll have to apply myself just as much now

Buster: You don’t hesitate to, that’s equally apparent

Rio: I never hated school, it just wasn’t a priority

Rio: but this has changed a lot of priorities, obviously

Buster: School is a means to an end, what you can accomplish after are the things you should prioritise, the bigger, realer goals

Rio: I am going to have to get another part-time job

Rio: Grandad was letting me do some shifts in the pub, can’t do that now

Buster: I’ll speak to my parents about whether or not they have anything they could offer you, but don’t get your hopes too high, they aren’t based in Dublin as often as they’re here

Rio: I’ll find something, it’s okay

Rio: Can you imagine me working with your parents

Buster: Yeah, it would give us the perfect excuse to work together

Rio: Now I see the vision

Buster: But fantasy aside, they’ll have contacts, I actually will talk to them

Rio: Not saying no, anything works for now and that’s better than

Rio: Fantasy back on, you will have to mansplain to me what it is they actually do, you’ll enjoy that

Buster: [do that rn as if baze are gonna sit her down in these half term hols when they reappear after the bday party and give her an interview lol]

Rio: [you’d be pretty well suited honestly, with your maths and business brain so you can go along with this faux interview vibe and not feel like a fool]

Buster: [have some fun being nerds with this fake interview scenario, him just fully giving her one after he’s explained this job lol, but also it is actually useful because we 100% can say that baze do know someone that gives her a job, why not, like my boo said she’d be good at whatever kind of office based stuff that would end up being]

Rio: [we know it’ll devolve into you just seducing him for the role lol but still, actually valid whilst you’re under 18 and can’t do shit and why not]

Buster: [mhmm, there’s sadly years before she can make money doing only fans because can’t be doing that illegally when getting Ali in the shit and alerting the social is the last thing she wants, so it tracks, love a roleplay moment, no regrets, I say y’all also deserve that as if you weren’t just being feral not long ago haha]

Rio: [yup, likewise working in bars or clubs before you’re legal either, soz that it’s really fucked with your plans but it will keep you on the straight and narrow so it’s not the worst thing in the world lol and yous do deserve it, can blatantly do this until you get to school]

Buster: [kill the time on her long ass boring bus ride the most fun way that you can, we love to see it, even though y’all will be gutted when you get to school and have to stop this/face reality]

Rio: I better let you socialise now

Buster: You’re already letting me with the only person I want to

Rio: You don’t care what your friends think?

Buster: I doubt the few coherent thoughts they’re able to form this early are about what I’m doing

Rio: I see, they need ‘til break to warm up their riveting chat about whatever it is you boys find to talk about

Buster: Girls usually, none of whom tend to be riveting themselves, which doesn’t leave me with my own high hopes for the chat

Rio: At least there’s sports scores to fall back on

Rio: girlfriend in another country sounds like you’re being catfished 

Buster: And we haven’t been on holiday since [whenever you would have] so it’s too late to be falling back on that cliche 

Rio: Poor boy

Buster: Not that they’d notice if I had been talking to someone directly under their noses for all that time, and it would allow me to be as serious as I am about you during those inescapable conversations

Rio: Speaking of inescapable, what are you going to do about all the desperate girls at your party wanting to wish you a happy birthday?

Buster: Tell the truth, I’m not interested in celebrating with any of them

Rio: You’re sure?

Buster: I’m sure they’re boring and not worth my time

Rio: Okay

Rio: like I’m not saying I’d like it but if you have to make out with someone for the look of the thing, I’d have to be fine with it

Buster: I don’t have to do anything I don’t want to, that isn’t the life I’m living

Rio: My point is more that you usually do, not that you need to, like

Buster: My priorities have shifted too, is the point

Rio: Then I’m not leaving your side

Buster: Good, because I definitely won’t like or be fine with it if you do

Rio: We’re going to be attached at the hip

Buster: How are your hips today?

Rio: Only the good kind of sore

Buster: Have you got any bruises yet?

Rio: [pics whereby you’ve pulled your top up slightly and lowered the band of your skirt a little like idk have I? would do this anywhere so we’re fine]

Rio: Might take you to make them show

Buster: Of course you’d need me, I should’ve known

Rio: You can put your hands on me like that, who’s going to say anything

Buster: You’re my birthday present, everyone is fully aware of that

Rio: You’re just as happy to see me

Buster: And being an excellent host, I invited you and you haven’t met most of the other guests that many times before

Rio: You are that

Rio: even if I only really care about meeting you

Buster: Naturally I matter most, it’s my party, nobody can fault you for those priorities

Rio: You’re my number one any day

Buster: Your absolute favourite cousin

Rio: I’m obsessed with you, I can’t wait to be on you

Buster: Holding hands so we don’t get lost is what we were told to do when we were little and you still are very small, it makes sense to carry on and keep you close to me, my logic can’t be faulted any more than your priorities can

Rio: You’re older and bigger, it’s your responsibility

Rio: They’d be proud of you, if anything

Buster: I’m protecting you and your good girl image

Rio: Anyone can see I behave best for you, they will

Buster: I know what’s best for you, how to keep you safe and out of trouble

Rio: Keep me with you, that’s where I belong

Buster: You belong to me

Rio: I love that everyone knows it, I’m so owned by you I can’t hide it from anybody

Buster: I need to remember that our costumes don’t hide anything, when I really start to own you, you’ll be covered in evidence

Rio: You’re just hugging me, we’re affectionate, that’s all

Buster: And you just bruise easily, or I don’t know my own strength

Rio: We’re playing, you can be rough

Rio: but you love your little cousin best of all

Buster: So can you, I’ll still love you

Rio: You’ll let me win, if that’s what I want

Buster: Whatever makes you happy, that’s all I want

Rio: You’re so lovely

Buster: You’ve earned it

Rio: I intend to, to keep you

Buster: Me too, no more mistakes

Rio: Nothing about this is a mistake, that’s what we have to remember

Buster: We’ll both make it impossible to forget and then we won’t be able to

Rio: No one deserves all of me but you

Buster: I’ve never given all of myself to anyone else and I never will

Rio: I love you, you don’t need anyone else

Buster: I need you too much for there to be room for any other people

Rio: We will get some time alone, I’ll make sure of it somehow

Buster: I’m not above sabotaging my own party to guarantee it ends early, if we have to

Rio: We shouldn’t need to, we have the whole holiday

Rio: Your sister will have some plans of her own at least some of the time, right?

Buster: She’s typically out more than she’s in, hopefully her desperation for [whatever latest designer things we’re saying she needs to buy/daily coffee order she needs to fulfil etc] wins out over gossip once you’ve stonewalled her enough

Rio: I’ll do my best

Rio: It’s easier to be a bitch these days

Buster: I meant it, I’ll help you deal with Nancy, I’m used to her trying to cause problems

Rio: I trust you, if anyone is used to dealing with her

Buster: We have the whole holiday, take a second to let that properly sink in

Rio: You never stay for a whole holiday, maybe when you were really little and your parents needed to work before they could do it from home

Rio: but that’s forever ago

Buster: I don’t remember a time when we weren’t rushing to get a flight back ASAP

Buster: but you’re staying

Rio: Unless I absolutely have to come back

Rio: but I’m being positive so yeah, I’m staying

Buster: I told you if you couldn’t come I’d spend my holiday there, the offer stands if you need to go home

Rio: We’ll be together, wherever

Buster: I promise

Rio: Me too

Rio: We’ll have [however many seconds these days add up to, I ain’t doing that maths but you can girl]

Buster: [when she’s better at maths than you and you’re so into it lol because you aren’t used to that being a thing]

Buster: Do another one

Rio: [do the countdown in seconds too]]

Buster: They’d be idiots not to hire you

Rio: I can use the unavoidable time we have to spend with your parents wowing them

Rio: I’m almost looking forward to it

Buster: Almost?

Rio: Well, it’ll still mean we’re not alone

Rio: that’s where all my real anticipation lies

[punkscowardschampions]

Ruster pt.5

Rio: good thing everyone else will be off their face and we don’t have to hide

Buster: What are you waiting for? You have bubbles to hide behind if you start to get shy

Rio: I’m not shy at all, that’s the problem

Buster: So tell me everything

Rio: Give me everything in front of your friends

Buster: I’ve got nothing to hide

Rio: There’s nothing stopping us

Buster: You can have it all, birthday girl

Rio: Can we have a party together, one year

Buster: Why not next? I don’t have anything planned yet

Rio: Sweet 16

Buster: The sweetest if I share with you

Rio: I’m sure Nance wants her own

Buster: I couldn't care less what she wants anyway

Rio: Me either

Rio: I want you and I deserve you more

Buster: I’m really proud of you for thinking like that

Rio: I thought you might be

Rio: It’s just the truth at this point

Buster: The truth is, I don’t think I’ve ever been more turned on by you than I am at this point, fuck

Rio: What about it turns you on most?

Buster: I can tell you mean it, you aren’t just saying what you know I want to hear

Rio: That’s only acceptable if you’re not going to meet the person

Rio: I have no intentions of breaking promises like that with you

Buster: You seriously do want what I want

Rio: All of it

Buster: Say it again

Rio: I deserve you and you deserve me

Buster: Jesus, Rio

Rio: You know you’d rather my name was paired with yours when people talked

Buster: They won’t shut up when I give you mine and we’re paired for real

Rio: Would you do that?

Buster: As soon as we’re old enough for me to properly make you mine

Rio: Is it even possible, like, legally

Rio: I just assumed no

Buster: We can and I will

Rio: You know you’re the father of my children, no matter what any law says

Buster: There’s no law against us, in this country or yours

Rio: You’re probably right, it just seems like that shouldn’t be true, can’t be

Buster: But I am right and it is

Buster: How many children do you want?

Rio: You can’t expect me to be sensible when I need you this much

Buster: I didn’t ask for a sensible answer, I asked for the answer

Rio: As many as we can fit in

Buster: We owe it to them, and the future, that they’re all allowed to exist

Rio: Your genetics are too good to use sparingly 

Buster: They’ll each grow up to be as flawless as you, in every way you are, and I’ll get to be a proud daddy constantly

Rio: That’s why I’ve only ever pictured you

Buster: Let yourself actually picture it right now

Rio: I might cry

Rio: You’re good with kids

Buster: Nobody’s as good as you

Rio: You’ve not even been trying

Rio: We’ll be the best team

Buster: If you want to see me try, I’ll borrow your sister and show you

Rio: That’s probably a dangerous idea

Rio: for multiple reasons

Buster: Live dangerously, play mummies and daddies with me

Rio: Fuck

Rio: Okay, when you’re here, I’ll hold you to it

Buster: Good, I’ll hold the baby

Rio: She’s not got much of a schedule but her feeding one yet but we could take her for a walk

Buster: And go on another shopping trip, even if she isn’t allowed to come

Rio: Even the local supermarkets a trek too far for her, you remember where I live

Buster: I’ll order cars for us, nowhere’s too far when you pay to overcompensate for the distance

Rio: She’ll get ideas

Buster: She’s playing the role of our kid, she should have ideas

Rio: I wanna spoil them but I don’t want them to be spoilt

Buster: They aren’t going to turn into Nance, don’t worry

Rio: She’s not the only example I can think of but

Buster: You said it, together we’ll be the best at this

Rio: And they’ll always have us both

Buster: We’ll always be a family, all of us

Rio: I’m glad Maggie will have her dad around

Buster: Me too

Buster: last time I shopped for a baby was to send presents to Violette

Rio: Poor little thing

Buster: Hopefully he’ll take better care of her than he did her mother

Rio: I don’t know how the pregnancy occurred 

Rio: She’s always been sick

Buster: I don’t want to think about it, what kind of man does that mean he is? It’s fucked up

Rio: She would’ve had to get herself to a level of ‘well’

Rio: maybe he thought the surface level of all that ran deeper, I don’t know

Buster: My mum still isn’t doing well with it, that’s what I know

Rio: Of course not

Buster: I hate seeing her like this, there should be something I can do, but there isn’t

Rio: Tell me about it

Buster: No, forget I said it, this downer isn’t what we’re supposed to be on

Rio: It’s okay, that’s reality

Buster: Everything we want is going to be a reality too, we’ll be better than okay

Rio: Or are we just fantasizing, to not have to think about how fucked reality is right now

Buster: Fantasies turn into reality, mine repeatedly have today

Rio: Some can

Buster: Ours do

Rio: You’re sweet

Buster: I’m serious

Rio: I know you are

Buster: You know I’m fully committed, I’ll buy you a ring as a promise

Rio: You will not

Rio: I’m not doubting your commitment 

Buster: Then why not? You can wear it until we’re old enough to get engaged

Rio: Because it’s actually your birthday and where am I going to say I’ve got that from if I start wearing it every day?

Buster: Who’ll notice? You already wear other jewellery every day

Rio: The stuff I wear every day means something

Buster: Yeah, but who’s keeping track of each piece besides you? Come on, baby, don’t you think we could get away with this?

Rio: I mean, maybe

Buster: And don’t you want to?

Rio: You know I want to

Buster: You can belong to me in front of everyone, mine in plain sight

Rio: Jesus, okay, okay

Rio: but you’re not allowed to get mad at whatever lie I have to come up with if anyone does notice, yeah

Buster: I’ll behave

Rio: When are we getting it?

Buster: At the airport, we can’t wait

Rio: You can’t wait 

Buster: Don’t pretend you aren’t soaking wet at the thought of it

Rio: You know me so well

Buster: Whenever your ring catches the light you’ll have to bite your tongue, I’ll know that from across the room

Rio: Why are you across the room from me?

Buster: Because I’m pouring you a [her fave drink]

Rio: As long as you’re having [his fave] too

Buster: Cheers

Rio: Slainte when you’re here, please

Buster: I’m not going to say that, babe

Rio: You’re some Irish too, come on now

Buster: I look and sound enough like a tourist to everyone who doesn’t realise I am without adding in phrases

Rio: Stick with me, you’ll be grand

Buster: We’ll both be grander if we stick to our own accents

Rio: Play with me, babe

Buster: My costume isn’t parrot, and you weren’t complaining about how my voice sounded earlier

Rio: IF you dressed up as a parrot, I might struggle to find you sexy

Buster: Well, don’t dare me or I’ll have to, and I’d struggle to sort any new costume this last minute

Rio: Very mature

Rio: You’re not being dared, please put down the feathers

Buster: I told you before, I can think of much better uses

Rio: Remind me

Buster: [ramble on about suggestively tickling her entire body with a feather in great detail, really taking his time to discuss every part of it in turn which I cba]

Rio: You are all I feel, Buster

Rio: I’m all hot again like I’ve just ran this bath but it could be stone cold for all I realise

Buster: [also ramble on about other saucy uses for pillows, giving when y’all were fucking yours drunk at Christmas I think it was, or pushing her face into one to shh her etc etc, all those vibes and all those ideas]

Rio: I want to be your pillow

Buster: [ofc send her a pic of you spooning your pillow as if she was, extra sauciness cos you’re fresh out of the shower and still in a towel]

Rio: Your hair, your strong arms wrapped around me, your hands 🥺

Rio: I can feel it all

Buster: What does it feel like?

Rio: Safety, peace, love

Rio: Don’t call me a hippie, I mean it 

Buster: I’ll give you all of those things, without waiting until I can call you my wife

Rio: You do

Buster: And more

Rio: If you do say so yourself

Rio: but I can’t disagree

Buster: I’m saying I swear to

Rio: You don’t have to write vows yet

Buster: I’ll tell my pillow then

Rio: Hey 😣

Buster: Practice makes perfect, remember

Rio: But

Rio: What am I going to do?

Buster: Think about your own

Rio: It’s a shame we’ve no bath crayons anymore 

Buster: Don’t you have lipstick?

Rio: There’s probably one in here somewhere, hold on

Buster: I’ll wait for you to write my name all over your skin once you find one

Rio: I thought you wanted me to get clean 🤔 

Buster: I don’t want you to forget both worlds are yours, you can have and do anything

Rio: Is that how you operate?

Buster: Don’t you know how I operate?

Rio: I know how you present yourself, how you want to be seen

Rio: the reality isn’t always that black and white 

Buster: The reality is, you’ve seen through the bullshit for years

Rio: I know you 

Rio: I like you, how you think

Buster: I’m glad you like me for my brain as well, babe

Rio: Nah, don’t get it twisted, this is entirely about your body, nothing else

Buster: Noted

Rio: Nerd

Buster: Brat

Rio: You’re gonna call me that like no big deal

Buster: Yeah, if you’re going to call me names

Rio: You like being a nerd

Buster: You like being a brat

Rio: I’m your good girl, aren’t I?

Buster: You tell me

Buster: Have you found a lipstick yet or not?

Rio: [send him a lil vid of you writing his name on your thigh]

Rio: Do you like the colour?

Buster: It looks unbelievable on you

Rio: It’ll look as stunning on you 

Buster: True, keep it safe for me

Rio: I didn’t think you’d want to wear it like that but okay, honey

Buster: As I’ve said before, you’re hilarious

Rio: You could say it with a little more conviction, meanie

Buster: Your jokes could land better

Rio: I’m sorry, I’ve not had time to work on a comedy routine, like

Buster: Apologise with more conviction and I’ll consider accepting

Rio: I guess we’re even

Buster: [write her name on you in the same place, but with a pen because you don’t just have lipstick lying around, it’s giving fancy fountain pen though not biro obvs]

Buster: Now we’re even

Rio: Don’t get ink all over my PJs

Buster: They’re waiting for you under your pillow

Rio: [updated countdown]

Rio: I’m not bringing any

Buster: You’ll need the luggage space to take home your new outfits

Rio: Maybe I’ll bring a spare suitcase…

Buster: I’ll buy you another to spare you from having to drag along an empty one

Rio: You don’t need to

Buster: You don’t have to worry about bringing anything which isn’t essential

Rio: So, costume, an outfit for a shopping trip, what else?

Buster: Nothing else

Rio: You’ve got me covered?

Buster: Totally

Rio: That’s a nice thought

Rio: What am I getting your sister though?

Buster: Grab something from the airport, if she insists on coming with me she can pick out what she wants for herself

Rio: Hmm

Rio: Or, I could book her something that gets her out of the house, a spa appointment or I’ll see when she last got her nails done 

Buster: Either/or

Rio: She’s not gonna invite me

Buster: Gossip is all she’s interested in and they’re ideal locations to, famously

Rio: I’m sure she’d rather take a friend, if she does ask, I’ll say that much

Buster: Good luck

Rio: You don’t think it’s a good idea?

Buster: I didn’t say that, in theory it’s a great idea

Rio: I will have to spend some time with her, it’s unavoidable

Buster: I know

Rio: I’ve got time to work on keeping my cool with her

Buster: I’ll help you

Rio: It’s not exactly your area of expertise, is it

Buster: Distracting you is

Rio: You can’t distract me when I’m talking to her

Buster: I always can

Rio: That’s the problem

Buster: You can handle it

Rio: It’s different now, I know so much more about you 

Buster: We’ll be working together, that’s the difference

Rio: A team 

Buster: I’ve got your back and you’ve got mine

Rio: Are you looking forward to your party now?

Buster: I’m looking forward to your costume reveal

Rio: I want to get it right for you

Buster: You won’t let me down

Rio: You’re going to love it, how it looks, how easy it is to touch me

Buster: I already love the sound of that

Rio: You’re going to like how long it takes you to get me ready too

Rio: though I think I’ll keep control of the makeup situation, no offence babe

Buster: None taken, except at your sense of humour

Rio: It’s no laughing matter, it’s an intricate look

Rio: I doubt your ability to focus on JUST my face for that long 

Buster: I’ve told you before not to underestimate me

Rio: You love a challenge, I know, I know

Rio: but you’re not glowing me down so I look crap in front of all your mates

Buster: They’re no competition I wouldn’t bother to sink that low 

Rio: Yeah, right

Rio: They’re obviously not mingers, boy

Buster: They’re obviously not me

Rio: Why would I come to hook up with anyone else now? I was talking about the girls

Buster: Why would I sabotage how you look regardless?

Rio: I don’t know because you have me all to yourself no matter what

Buster: Good, we can abandon the hypothetical

Rio: Don’t you like being jealous?

Buster: Jealous of who?

Rio: Whoever, that’s not the important bit

Buster: I don’t have anyone to be jealous of

Rio: Could have

Buster: No I couldn’t

Rio: Not a fantasy then

Buster: The best tend to be somewhat rooted in reality

Rio: You pick one then, tell me what’s actually gonna happen

Buster: Since you want me to make you jealous, that’s what’s going to happen

Rio: Easy

Buster: Yeah

Rio: I’ll be extra nice after

Rio: It’s still your birthday

Buster: Ours, you’ve forgotten again

Rio: It’s hard to remember

Rio: that any of this is real

Buster: The cold bath is probably making this feel even more like a daydream

Rio: More than a single top-up is taking the piss, like

Buster: Not when you get here

Rio: Now that’s luxury

Buster: And it’s real

Rio: I’ve just remembered I need my gym clothes too, another reality I’m looking forward to

Buster: I’d offer to add them to the shopping list, but I do remember liking how you described yours

Rio: They won’t take up any space

Buster: Barely

Rio: If we buy too much you can keep ‘em

Buster: I can’t wait for the jokes about wearing them

Rio: That’s no joke, you’d look too fine

Buster: The wrong kind of jealousy for you to fantasise about though

Rio: Oh, wow, bold

Rio: I didn’t say you’d look better than me

Buster: Neither did I, I’m arrogant instead of delusional

Rio: And you can never resist an opportunity to talk me up 🥰

Buster: I don’t waste opportunities, you know that

Rio: I’m thinking of every one we’re going to have

Buster: Me too

Rio: We’ve wasted too many to do it again, ever

Buster: That’s how I feel about jealousy, I have been of your exes for long enough

Rio: I don’t need you jealous

Rio: I just want you to want me, more than anything

Buster: I need you, don’t forget 

Rio: I won’t

Rio: I’m going to keep you

Buster: Forever

Rio: You’re my boyfriend

Buster: I really am

Rio: I can’t stop saying it, it feels too good

Buster: Don’t, keep saying it

Rio: [send him a voice note]

Buster: [send her a good girl one back]

Rio: It’s better than my name, you can just call me that forever

Buster: Nothing’s better than your name

Rio: I said yours so much

Rio: remember?

Buster: It was unforgettable

Rio: As long as you’re the only one who can’t forget it, I didn’t think about volume even once

Buster: You’d be getting shouted at by now if anyone had heard

Rio: Maybe

Rio: The awkwardness might just stop that but nah, we’re safe, I’m sure

Rio: Anyone who’s here was downstairs

Buster: We are, and you’ll be here soon

Buster: [and an updated countdown]

Rio: I can’t promise not to say your name until then

Buster: Promise you aren’t going to stop saying my name until then

Rio: [send him that voice note, thankfully not being loud as hell in this moment]

Buster: Again

Rio: [more !!]

Buster: [obvs send her one back saying her name, simply must]

Rio: I need to get out of this bath, I’m shivering

Buster: Get back into bed

Rio: How do you say my name in a way no one else does

Buster: Because you’re special to me, how I feel about you no one else is going to

Rio: I’m your girl

Buster: You’re everything

Rio: I want you in this bed

Buster: I’ll be your pillow too, like you’ve been mine this entire time

Buster: [another pillow snuggling selfie that’s more dramatic than his earlier one]

Rio: [copying him to be like like this? Obviously you’ve put no clothes on but you’ve been strategic with your picture]

Buster: You’ll warm up in a second, baby

Rio: You look after me like no one else, Buster

Buster: I look after you how everyone else should, that’s all

Rio: I like that it’s you

Buster: I love taking care of you

Rio: It’s like you were made for it

Buster: It feels like I was

Rio: You’re so daddy it’s unreal

Buster: You couldn’t stop telling me that either

Rio: Because you need to hear it, keep being it, you love it and I love you

Buster: You love me

Rio: So much, it’s the third thought I had when I found out about everything

Buster: Normally I’d hate coming third

Rio: You can’t really expect higher given the circumstances, that’d be insanely selfish and awful of me

Buster: It’d be out of character for you, I’d assume that, given the circumstances, you were having some kind of breakdown

Rio: Don’t say that, I’m not chalking this down to a breakdown

Rio: if you want an out, get it yourself

Buster: What I said is I’m glad it isn’t, you’re still you and I’ll take third

Rio: You know how I feel about you

Buster: Yeah, you love me so much

Rio: And more and more if you don’t stop

Buster: I won’t

Buster: I want more

Rio: You can have everything, I want you to have it

Buster: Give it to me

Rio: No one can stop you taking what’s rightfully yours

Rio: what’s been waiting for you since [how old y’all were when you had your first kiss]

Buster: I’m breaking so many of my rules for you simply by being that patient 

Rio: How patient do you think you’ve been, really? 

Buster: I’ve waited years, you just said so

Rio: Waited doesn’t necessarily indicate patience 

Buster: What else does it indicate?

Rio: Necessity, definitely

Buster: Exactly, patience was necessary

Buster: I’m not pretending I enjoyed having to

Rio: Good, I don’t think you fooled anyone on that score

Buster: I wasn’t trying

Rio: No one expected different from you, your age, who your parents are

Rio: you got to be an arsehole

Buster: I’ll fool everyone now that we both have something to gain from doing it

Rio: Nothing has to change, really, except you being slightly more willing to come to Dublin, for whatever reason

Buster: Because I’m being a supportive cousin, for obvious reasons

Rio: If there’s any time to drop the not caring bit, I suppose so

Buster: Nobody’ll question the timing, there’s that silver lining at least

Rio: I don’t wanna think of it that way, however practical 

Buster: Of course you don’t

Rio: It’s wrong

Buster: I’m sorry

Rio: I started it but using any of this to our advantage is beyond fucked up, I don’t know how I had the nerve to

Buster: Wanting something good to come out of this isn’t fucked up

Rio: Yes it is, no one else gets anything good out of this, not Edie, Liam, Moses

Rio: why should I, of all people

Buster: Because you’re not them, you still have to find reasons to carry on, for their sakes, everyone else’s and your own

Rio: Right

Buster: You had a life before, things you felt and wanted, and you’ll have a life after, once she’s back home and he’s serving his sentence, it’s your decision what you think it should look like

Rio: It’s not that simple

Buster: It doesn’t need to be overcomplicated 

Rio: You don’t always get to decide, how things affect you, sometimes they just do

Buster: You get to decide what you’re going to do next

Rio: Not in a vacuum, I have to think about everyone else

Buster: No shit, every action has a consequence, you have to decide whether you can live with what those consequences could be, or not

Rio: Yeah, I know

Buster: It isn’t our fault but it’s our responsibility, whatever happens when we act on how we feel

Rio: I know that too

Buster: Ignorance isn’t bliss, we’ll always be better off knowing what we’re getting into

Rio: No one’s claiming we can pretend about this

Buster: I’m sick of pretending

Rio: You want something real

Buster: We both do

Rio: I just mean there’s more bullshit in your life

Buster: I know what you meant

Rio: At least you’re not going to try to deny it

Buster: Why would I?

Rio: You would before

Buster: I had to protect myself then, I can trust you now

Rio: I was never going to tell anyone

Buster: I was never going to show weakness like that to someone who already makes me weak

Rio: You’re not weak

Rio: having fake friends and acting up to fit in better doesn’t make you weak either

Buster: I am for you

Rio: What is it about me?

Buster: Is this where I repeat every compliment I’ve given you today?

Rio: No I wasn’t fishing this time

Rio: I don’t know, do you think you’d like me as much if we met as strangers?

Buster: You’d have all the same qualities I recognise in you, of course I would

Rio: I’m just thinking about it, how much easier it’d be but all the more unlikely for it, obviously

Buster: You think I want you because I can’t have you and I’m rarely told no

Rio: It’s part of the appeal

Buster: You’d be as appealing if you threw yourself at me as an unknown stranger

Rio: Why am I throwing myself at you, boy

Buster: Because the scenario needed a clear yes, to illustrate my point

Rio: Hmm, let you off then

Buster: And why wouldn’t you? 

Rio: Because throwing yourself at people is not attractive

Buster: It would be if you did it, everything you do is

Rio: That’s mutual

Rio: It’d be annoying if I never got to respond

Buster: It very much was, when we couldn’t

Rio: Worse when I didn’t have a boyfriend to bring

Buster: Don’t remind me of the boyfriends you paraded in front of me

Rio: It was your fault

Buster: It was yours you didn’t choose better

Rio: There was nothing wrong with them, you always say that

Buster: And I’m always right

Rio: You were just jealous, rightly so

Buster: No, I told you, you’re a goddess, none of them deserved to be anywhere near you

Rio: I needed them, I couldn’t be around you and be alone

Buster: It’s embarrassing for them they could be around you and act like they did, I’m not jealous, I’m angry

Rio: Don’t be, it’s fine 

Rio: I wasn’t a good girlfriend

Buster: You’re good for me, that’s what matters

Rio: You’re not the thing that will come between me being a good girlfriend this time, there’s no pretending necessary 

Buster: And it isn’t necessary for me to hit them, I know

Rio: They aren’t anymore, this is about us

Buster: Yeah, we’re properly an us from now on

Rio: I’ll reapply your name, I still have the lipstick

Buster: I could reapply yours too

Buster: in ink or as a bruise, I don’t have any yet, other than my lip

Rio: Your poor lip

Buster: Your hips must hurt more

Rio: Only as much as the rest of me does, missing you, wanting your touch

Buster: I’m there with you as your pillow, let me touch you

Rio: We can stay like this, as long as we want

Buster: Until you pass out anyway

Rio: I’m not going anywhere

Buster: Where’s my name going?

Rio: Depends where you want it

Rio: Somewhere hidden, I could keep it for longer

Buster: No spoilers, but what parts of your body does your costume hide?

Rio: I need to consider how I’ll be moving and how often, a good question

Buster: Luckily I’m there as your pillow for you to try out every possible way you might want to move

Rio: I’ve thought about nothing else for what feels like days even though it’s only been [however long you’ve been talking] somehow

Buster: You’re all I think about since that kiss

Rio: How have we only kissed that once? It doesn’t seem possible

Buster: I need to kiss you again, I can’t stop putting my mouth all over this pillow

Rio: I want to kiss you so badly I’d be okay if that’s all we did

Rio: your mouth, I have it memorised from watching you speak and drink and smile

Buster: I’ve seen you bite the inside of yours so often it’s etched into my memory too

Rio: I haven’t been quiet enough yet today, letting your name out whenever I want

Buster: You haven’t had me to keep you quiet yet

Rio: I can push my face into this pillow, like you said

Buster: And bite it instead of your cheek

Rio: Don’t you want to feel the scar?

Buster: You’ll have plenty of other opportunities

Rio: You don’t want me to get hurt

Buster: You’re my baby

Rio: You’re so loving

Buster: You’re so loveable 

Rio: You make me feel so cute

Buster: Well, you’re the cutest

Buster: fucking adorable

Rio: I adore you, how little you make me feel

Buster: You are little

Buster: Did you stop growing for me [whenever she did because of course he has noticed how tall she is at different ages], or is it a random coincidence for me to get obsessed with?

Rio: I think everything is for you, however much control I did or didn’t have, I’ve always been your little girl

Buster: I love everything about you

Rio: You’re my protector, the way you can overpower me drives me wild

Buster: [give her a pillow demo, obvs, you gotta]

Rio: Like

Rio: I so badly need holding down by you, immediately

Buster: It wouldn’t matter where you wrote my name, I’ll keep you completely still, no one but us would know it’s even there

Rio: It’s in my eyes, if anyone wants to see it

Rio: there’s no hiding that, ever

Buster: Show me, I want to see it

Rio: [close-up eye selfie]

Buster: [show her that you’ve made it your phone screen for rn, for the dangerous game of seeing if anyone’ll see it because it’s a close up and you could get away with peeps not realising but also you very much could get found out, as is always y’alls vibe]

Rio: Can I have something?

Buster: [send her a close up of your mouth after what she said about memorising it cos we loved that, and could be anyone’s]

Rio: [show him that you’ve set it too]

Rio: You’re unreal

Buster: Kiss me

Rio: [send him the sounds because you can’t show yourself being feral on your phone screen but it gets the insane vibe across]

Buster: [send her your every sound in reaction, including your bed hitting the wall cos of how hard you’re humping this pillow]

Rio: You’re my crush, I would have posters of you on my wall

Buster: You’re my girlfriend, I should put pictures of you up on my walls

Rio: When you go to Uni

Buster: Remember that picture of us [cue a childhood mem pre dare kiss that is adorable and has no place in this feral moment except it does because y’all have always been in love] that’s in between the pages of [a book whether it’s his fave to read or a school book he has to look at often, we know what I’m saying]

Rio: We look so sweet, and happy

Rio: Our kids will look like that

Buster: They’ll be even happier, I promise

Rio: We can be that happy, together, I promise

Buster: I know we will be

Rio: I need to go through the photo albums with you inside me

Buster: Kiss every single photo of me

Rio: It will heal little me and you, to know they get to be together and get married and have all the babies

Buster: We’re going to have to wait to look because I won’t be able to stop myself getting you pregnant right then and there

Rio: It’s so hard being good

Rio: but you can’t, it’s okay

Buster: You’ll be such a good mother

Rio: You’re already incredible at it, no practice needed but I’ll keep letting you perfect it

Buster: Put your lipstick on and kiss me again

Rio: [find out your camera so you can film this this time and then take picture of the lipstick on your screen so he can see the carnage]

Buster: [reciprocate by sending her a lil vid of your feral antics with this pillow because truly losing it over everything y’all have been talking about and now that content]

Rio: [sending him pictures that you like of him from his parents’ socials, just a spam, we know what we’re saying]

Rio: That’s my man, I’ve needed you from birth

Buster: [do the same even though it’s less of a spam because you can’t stop doing what you’re doing and also are shamelessly getting distracted by looking at said pics of her you’re choosing, not at all casually taking you a thousand years to send each pic but we’re not soz, I imagine you’re picking ones that have similarities to the ones of you where possible, as well as ones where she just looks adorable because duh]

Rio: Tell her how much you love her

Buster: [pick your fave picture for whatever reason and send her content of you saying every unhinged compliment that you can vaguely coherently get out of your mouth, we all know that the first ILY is happening and then he’ll be on a loop of it, all the while fucking this pillow like his life depends on it so the noises are also unhinged]

Rio: Oh my fucking God, I love you, I love you

Rio: give me the mini-mes we want

Buster: Being the daddy of twins would heal me most of all

Rio: I will give you perfect twins

Buster: Swear

Rio: [drool all over your favourite picture of him whilst making the most !! EYE CONTACT]

Buster: How perfect you are is going to make me cum

Rio: I’m so close

Rio: when we have a house full of photos and memories, how are we ever getting anything done?

Buster: We’ll keep making babies in every room, that’s all we need to do

Rio: You’re so full of love

Buster: I’ll fill you with it

Rio: I want more than anyone else has because I love you most

Buster: It’s all yours

Rio: Everyone will know, how often you’re fucking me

Buster: They’ll be sick of overhearing us, they need visuals

Rio: Our babies, nobody else stands a chance with how beautiful our DNA is gonna combine

Buster: And beauty is only part of it, they’ll be as smart as us, love as hard, have everything they want

Rio: The luckiest

Buster: We’re making their luck for them, guaranteeing how happy they’ll be and that nothing’ll go wrong, but also, if it dared to, they could handle it

Rio: If we made it this far, nothing can break us, the safety of that

Buster: Nothing can break us and I won’t let anything break you

Rio: We’ll look after each other

Buster: I owe you ages where I didn’t

Rio: I’m not keeping count

Buster: We both know how much lost time there is to make up for

Rio: How long we can be together far outweighs it

Buster: Don’t ever die and I won’t either

Rio: I swear that too

Buster: [bite your poor lip again and bleed all over your phone screen whichever pic of her is up, I like to think it’s one around or just before their first kiss era just cos, copying the eye contact she made, as your promise too]

Rio: [taking a hot sec to get back to him, for the obvious reasons here]

Rio: Your lip is going to be too swollen to kiss

Buster: I’ll ice it, it’ll be fine

Rio: Fine is far from the word but

Buster: I’ll have you to kiss it better, fine isn’t the word

Rio: I can’t believe you’re like this

Buster: Why?

Rio: Because why would anyone so right for me exist

Buster: Soulmates exist, and I told you, we’re each others

Rio: I know

Rio: Are you exhausted?

Buster: Not yet

Rio: Show-off

Rio: I need to get water

Buster: I’d be showing off if I said I’ll carry you downstairs to get some

Rio: I can’t wait that long, flex though it’d be

Rio: Blame yourself, like

Buster: My past self, and yours

Rio: Aw, well I can’t be mad at them

Buster: And I definitely can’t be at our future kids

Rio: We’ve got time to learn, they’ll need discipline sometimes

Buster: I don’t think so, they’ll be little angels, like you

Buster: but I’ll do the voice, if I must

Rio: Is that how you remember me?

Rio: I obviously can’t be the strict parent, can I

Buster: You were well behaved, but maybe that’s because Nance and I weren’t

Buster: or because of how good you’ve been for me today

Rio: We only saw you on holidays, you were allowed to be overwhelmed by all the people, I was more used to them

Buster: I was excited to see you, you’re the only person who overwhelms me

Rio: I was to see you too

Rio: I wouldn’t be able to sleep the night before

Buster: You need to sleep soon though, you’re exhausted

Rio: I am not

Rio: and I’ve got my water, thank you very much

Buster: You are, baby

Buster: you’re going once you’ve got an empty glass

Rio: Ah, you’re practising being authoritative 

Buster: I can just tell, your question about whether or not I was gave me a clue

Rio: I was thinking about how many times you’ve came

Rio: and being polite, obviously

Buster: Mind your manners, and maybe I’ll admit to being a little tired

Rio: It’d be insulting if you weren’t

Buster: We’ve had a busy day together

Rio: God, I hope you weren’t doing anything important

Rio: I really did derail your whole day

Buster: Homework, but I’d finished

Rio: I don’t think I could pretend to be sorry about your homework so I’m glad you were already done

Buster: I’d have done my best to ignore your messages a while longer otherwise, so I’m glad too

Rio: That actually seems like so long ago

Buster: It was, we’ve moved really far past that

Rio: Thank God

Rio: I don’t like being a raging bitch

Buster: Oh please, you weren’t

Rio: It was close

Buster: You barely expressed a justified amount of rage for how much of a bitch Nancy was being, you never do

Rio: Because there’s no point

Buster: There’s a point to not bottling it up, ask all the family members who’ve suffered for doing exactly that with their emotion of choice

Rio: Okay but I’m not bottling it up

Rio: She wants a reaction only second to wanting the gossip

Buster: Okay, where are you letting it out?

Rio: I shouted at you instead

Buster: Did you? That seemed like foreplay to me

Rio: It would to you

Buster: Yeah

Rio: You’re supposed to fight with your partner, not everyone

Buster: She’ll treat you as a doormat whenever you allow her to, which isn’t exclusive to my sister, that’s all

Rio: I don’t let people treat me like a doormat, I’m just not confrontational for the sake of it

Buster: Neither am I

Rio: I’m not coming for you

Buster: Good, because it would be really bad manners, as well as timing

Rio: Tell yourself

Buster: I’m not coming for you either

Rio: Good

Buster: I’m looking out for you, I’m supposed to

Rio: It’s cool

Buster: Say it like you mean it, babe

Rio: It really is, let’s not spoil anything

Buster: Drink your water, I’ll go and get my own

Rio: You can go to bed, don’t worry

Buster: That would spoil things, tell me you don’t want me to at least

Rio: We’ll talk as soon as you wake up, won’t we?

Buster: Will you dream about me?

Rio: You know I will

Buster: I’ll miss you, I don’t want to

Rio: I know, it feels horrible

Buster: My room’s too quiet, and colder, in contrast to minutes ago

Buster: making me feel as though that all happened ages before, or didn’t really

Rio: We’ll stay awake, we don’t have to go

Buster: We can’t, I’m meant to be looking after you

Rio: You need to put your dressing gown on, or get snuggled in properly

Rio: I don’t want you to be cold

Buster: [tuck yourself up and send her the evidence as a pic]

Rio: [do the same like there, that’s better]

Buster: Where’s [whatever childhood fave toy she used to have and carry around everywhere a la my boo and Ted]?

Rio: [send him a selfie because I’m sure said cuddly is not far even if now on a shelf or something for safety]

Rio: 👋

Buster: [send her back one of whatever fave toy you were rocking in the same era defs on a shelf but not thrown away, idk if it’s a toy car or figure or what I’m not a boy]

Rio: I remember you

Rio: I thought you’d have got rid of all yours, for sure

Buster: I did the rest

Rio: You can’t keep everything

Rio: it’s nice to have some reminders though, I think

Buster: I wouldn’t want to completely forget who I was, and sometimes that feels easily done, even with physical reminders

Rio: I know what you mean

Rio: it’s hard to trust my memories now but some of them are still good, I have to believe that

Buster: [send her a pic of the pic you mentioned before that you keep in that book, of y’all little and happy because clearly a good memory]

Rio: Exactly, like then

Rio: and you still are the cutest little kid I’ve ever seen, I wasn’t being hyperbolic

Buster: We seriously are going to have the cutest kids anyone’s ever seen

Rio: You would need to stay in school forever

Rio: I’m going to have to keep in shape until I’m old enough to be a grandma to keep up with the other mammys

Buster: They’re the ones who need to worry about keeping up with you, however old you are

Buster: you’ll age like [insert some fancy af whiskey or something here idk but he would]

Rio: We’re just not used to older mums, or even ‘age-appropriate’ in this family, that’s all

Buster: We’ll know when it’s right to start our family

Rio: I can wait really

Rio: Your family would kill you and it’s the last thing mine needs

Buster: My parents are those hypocrites, as if me and Nance weren’t the most poorly timed and shamelessly unplanned thing they’ve ever done

Rio: They obviously still wanted you though

Buster: Nancy is welcome and lucky that they wanted me, yeah

Rio: You’re going to be the first person to be wanting twins if you meant that

Rio: they’re always a shock, or a surprise if you can be positive about it

Buster: I meant it

Rio: We’ve got good odds

Buster: I have unbeatable odds in regard to getting what I want

Rio: Not that you like to brag

Buster: I’d love to brag about you

Buster: How long are wedding vows allowed to be?

Rio: You cannot make people sit through that 😳

Buster: I can and will

Rio: I’d cry all my makeup off

Buster: You’re breathtaking without any

Rio: You’re not allowed to make me so weak

Buster: You did it to me first

Rio: It’s a secret right now

Buster: A circle of kids saw me shaking when we kissed, it was no secret I almost missed and sucked your chin, it’s my nightmare fuel

Rio: And I bet none of them remember 

Rio: well, our siblings for piss-taking potential, sure but not like we do

Buster: I wish you didn’t

Rio: That’s so mean, don’t take my happy memories away

Buster: I wish it was a less embarrassing memory then, I so badly wanted our first kiss to be perfect

Rio: First times aren’t meant to be

Buster: This kiss is going to be

Rio: If you’re trying to tell me you’ve got better, I was giving you that for free, like

Buster: Sadly your jokes haven’t

Rio: Who’s joking

Buster: I can’t remember what I was trying to tell you

Rio: You’ll remember if it matters

Rio: you don’t need to freak out about any of this, you know

Buster: I’m not, I left them behind with him, that kid having the biggest of his life

Rio: Understandable, we were only babies

Buster: We didn’t know what we were doing

Rio: Ugh, I’m just thinking about your first time again, change the subject it’s too sad

Buster: Don’t, think about [an updated countdown]

Rio: I can’t help but think about it

Rio: it’s not just you, that’s the problem, it’s everywhere

Buster: It doesn’t need to cause problems

Rio: It does

Buster: Why?

Rio: That’s my experience, what I’ve seen

Buster: What we’re talking about was my experience

Rio: I know

Buster: You’re trying to draw parallels which don’t exist, my first time doesn’t compare to the other situations you’re thinking about

Rio: Maybe we should slow down

Buster: I’m not dignifying that bullshit with an answer

Rio: Can you not

Rio: This is a lot, no one wants it to be a trauma response

Buster: Can you fucking not, Rio

Buster: it isn’t

Rio: What’s wrong with slow?

Buster: I’m not a victim of anything, nor fragile, that’s what’s wrong

Rio: This isn’t all about you, believe it or not

Buster: You said this was what you needed, I believed that

Rio: There’s no space for any uncertainty 

Buster: I am certain, I thought you wanted what I want

Rio: I want to be sure, that’s what time would give

Buster: Take some, space too, I hope it helps you figure out all your maybes and gives you what you want

Rio: If we can’t have a conversation about this then fine, that’s clearly for the best

Buster: We’ve been having this conversation all day

Rio: Yeah, likewise if you’re sick of it

Buster: I don’t know what else I can say that I haven’t

Rio: So I’ll go and leave you alone

Buster: Go if you want, or stay and talk in circles

Rio: That probably means we’re on the wrong track, no?

Buster: We’re evidently not in the same place

Rio: Do you want to talk to me tomorrow or not?

Buster: You’re asking to slow things down, when do you want to talk to me?

Rio: I’ve already talked in circles so

Buster: So I’m going to bed, I’ll talk to you tomorrow

Rio: Goodnight then

Buster: Yeah, goodnight 

[punkscowardschampions]

Ruster pt.4

Rio: You had to try other people, we both did, it would be a mistake not to

Buster: I wouldn’t have felt ready regardless, even waiting until you did, I knew that

Rio: Don’t you feel ready now?

Buster: For you, that’s different

Rio: I’m not talking about me, I mean in general, is it different now?

Buster: Why would it be? None of my feelings have changed

Rio: I need to think about this

Rio: I’m not going to fuck you up further

Buster: You’re not going to fuck me up

Rio: No, I’m not because there’s no time limit on this

Buster: You said you have to think about me, that you only cum because of me, we’re the same

Rio: Yeah but

Rio: like, you still want these girls now, it’s not just a competition or trying to get over me

Buster: I don’t want them, I want you

Rio: You want me more

Buster: You know I do, you’re all I want

Rio: What if it makes you feel how that did, what’s our plan then?

Buster: We don’t need a back-up plan, that isn’t how I’m going to feel

Rio: Did your first time feel how you expected?

Buster: I didn’t know what to expect

Rio: You hadn’t wondered beforehand

Buster: Yeah, but we’ve established my imagination is lacking

Rio: I don’t really believe that about you

Buster: What do you really believe?

Rio: That’s what I’m trying to establish

Buster: Don’t you trust me?

Rio: Of course, this isn’t a trust thing

Buster: Why is it a thing at all?

Rio: Because I care about you

Buster: I’m fine

Rio: I’m aiming a bit higher than fine, Mr Blue Skies

Buster: You know what I mean, it’s like when I threw up because I drank [insert alcohol and an amount here], that was peer pressure too

Rio: I know how it works, yeah

Rio: We’ve all been there

Buster: I avoid [said alcohol] and her, it works

Rio: That’s a bandage at best and you know it

Buster: Sometimes a bandage suffices, not every wound needs stitches

Rio: You avoided me too, we’re barely in past-tense territory with that one

Buster: So?

Rio: So if this goes badly that’s the plan, you don’t need to tell me for me to know it

Rio: that’s what you do

Buster: How many times, this isn’t going to go badly

Rio: It could, you can’t promise anything

Buster: I can and I do promise, I won’t let it

Rio: That’s too much pressure

Buster: I thrive under pressure, you know that

Rio: That’s what you’re telling yourself to cope with how much you’re under

Buster: I’m not lying to myself, it’s true

Rio: It is true but I don’t want it to be true about this

Rio: it isn’t homework or a fucking match

Buster: No, it’s more important

Rio: Jesus, you don’t know how to stop

Buster: Don’t treat me like I’m a complete fuck up because I told you about one mistake

Rio: I’m not, I’m asking you to stop for one second here

Buster: Stop what?

Rio: Stop trying to fix everything and be perfect

Buster: That’s what I do and who we are

Rio: I am the furthest from perfect 

Buster: Not to me

Rio: But I am and that’s especially how I feel right now

Buster: Which is why I’ve been trying so hard to make you feel better

Rio: I know how hard you’ve been trying

Buster: Then don’t tell me to stop

Rio: I just don’t want you to resent me

Buster: Listen to me, none of it is your fault, I couldn’t

Rio: When you’ve tried so hard and I’m still not perfect, how could you not

Buster: You are, I’m trying to make you realise and feel it again, and I’ll keep that up forever, because you should see yourself like that, everyone else does

Rio: I let down the people who matter, what they think and how I get better for them is what I care about

Buster: They don’t think that, I guarantee you

Rio: It’s just true

Buster: No it isn’t, you did everything you could with the info you had at the time, and since, you’ve done more, been taking care of everyone but yourself

Rio: If we were close, like sisters are meant to be

Rio: Share everything, I wasn’t that for her, couldn’t be, and she paid the price

Buster: You can’t force it, or Grace and Janis would be, nobody’s more heavy-handed about that than her

Rio: Why is it forced?

Buster: Personalities clash, look at Nance and Ava, they’ll never be close

Buster: you and Edie are just different, that doesn’t mean you failed

Rio: Oh, I really want to be the Nancy in that situation

Buster: It’s a shit example

Rio: No, it’s exactly the same

Buster: Come on, Nancy doesn’t give a fuck about anyone but herself

Rio: I’m still that sister

Buster: You’re not, you make an effort with them all, you care

Rio: She didn’t feel like she could come to me, it’s for nothing

Buster: Being closer doesn’t mean she would either, that’s what abusers do, they make you feel like you’ve got nobody except them

Buster: she didn’t tell Liam until a year later, she didn’t tell your mum

Rio: How could she ever believe that

Buster: Because he worked hard to make her

Rio: We never went anywhere, we were always there for her

Buster: But so was he, in her head wherever she went and whoever she was with

Rio: Ain’t that what love is

Buster: Yeah, and that’s why it’s easy to twist, if you’re someone like him, tell her it’s love

Rio: I’m tired of talking about it

Buster: I know, baby

Rio: but it’s all that’s there, in my head

Buster: You can get out of your head soon

Rio: I might start now

Buster: It’ll always be tempting

Rio: No one has to find out, I’m not an idiot

Buster: You’re no amateur 

Rio: Getting ready is going to be an undertaking but potentially worth it

Buster: Do you want me to leave you to it?

Rio: What are you gonna do with the rest of your evening?

Buster: Going down the boxing gym seems my best bet for the same reasons

Rio: You’re being very sensible and healthy all of a sudden

Buster: Unsurprisingly, you made me feel bad about what I do when I’m not 

Rio: Come on, what did you expect me to say about that?

Buster: What I did or didn’t expect you to say doesn’t matter, we’re done talking about it

Rio: I’m not going to apologise for thinking it’s depressing but I’m sorry for bringing up, I already said so

Buster: Yeah, you have, and that apology’s enough

Rio: I’ll take your word for it

Buster: Good

Rio: Let’s be friends again

Buster: We are, go and get ready

Rio: Are you saying I looked like a total mess on the phone?

Buster: You said you were going out

Rio: I am but you made it sound like an emergency 

Buster: You looked gorgeous on the phone

Rio: 🎣 for that but thank you

Rio: Will you call me again later when you’re all hot and sweaty

Buster: Will you pick up? Where are you going?

Rio: Of course I will

Rio: I don’t know, nowhere crazy, heaven forbid

Buster: Then of course I’ll call you

Rio: You can always call me

Buster: I will

Rio: I still have some friends, even if they’re dying to ask me shit they’re too decent to actually do it, that’s where I’ll be, no one can say much about that, yeah?

Buster: And I’ll be here, whatever time you get back

Rio: You’re not mad, are you

Rio: I thought you’d like some time

Buster: Not at you

Rio: Then what?

Buster: I’m mad at myself, obviously, it wasn’t my finest hour

Rio: I’ve made loads of mistakes

Rio: I just know for a fact you don’t want to hear about them

Buster: You reliving yours wouldn’t erase mine or make either of us feel better

Rio: Well exactly

Rio: You’re allowed to make mistakes, Buster, it doesn’t make you a bad person

Buster: Not knowing better makes me an idiot, I’m meant to be smarter than that

Rio: Smarter than peer pressure?

Rio: What other people think matters to you, you can’t fight that

Buster: I should, my parents don’t give a fuck what people think

Rio: They’re not in school, they don’t have to mind

Buster: They didn’t when they were, they never have

Rio: Of course that’s what they say, you get the glory days edit or the sob story, mood and what they’re aiming for depending 

Buster: Again, I’m not lying to myself and they aren’t to me, it’s the truth unedited

Rio: It’s not lying but it’s a long time ago

Rio: I don’t think they remember the feelings like that

Buster: They had bigger problems

Rio: Is that why it makes you feel like an idiot? Like it’s a stupid thing to care about?

Buster: I don’t want to talk about this, you have bigger problems too, it is, and was, a stupid thing to care about

Rio: It isn’t, this isn’t a competition and I’m not looking to win

Buster: But you would if it were, I’m aware how easy they’ve guaranteed my life is

Rio: That’s not a bad thing

Buster: Precisely my point, what happened isn’t a sob story, I don’t have any

Rio: You’re still entirely capable of having bad experiences

Buster: It wasn’t that bad, I didn’t say it was

Rio: Okay, fine

Buster: Hopefully your friends win as far as providing a distraction is concerned

Rio: I never asked you for one

Buster: I offered

Rio: Because you think that’s what this is

Buster: I don’t think it’s all this is, no

Rio: A big enough part that it’s insulting though

Buster: I’ll keep trying however insulted you are

Rio: Do you think that’s a good thing?

Buster: Why don’t you?

Rio: Because you’re ignoring what I’m telling you and what I want

Buster: You’d rather I ignore everything that’s happening to you, yeah?

Rio: Maybe, yeah

Buster: Bullshit, I tried that too and you practically begged me to get involved

Rio: That’s caring about Edie, about this family

Rio: and shutting your sister up, that isn’t the same thing remotely

Buster: You’re part of this family and you need somebody to care about you

Rio: I didn’t beg you

Buster: You don’t have to

Rio: Can’t you just treat me like everyone else

Buster: No, Rio

Rio: For fuck’s sake

Rio: I don’t know what I want from you

Buster: You aren’t used to the role reversal, being the one who’s looked after for once 

Rio: No

Buster: It’s okay, this is as new to me

Rio: You have limited experience with it too

Buster: We’ll figure it out together

Rio: I don’t want you to get bored

Buster: I’m not a sociopath, I wouldn’t leave you because your grief for Edie, Liam and the rest of your family isn’t something you can instantly get over, and is therefore boring me

Rio: I mean I don’t want to be something you have to look after, another responsibility when you already have loads

Buster: I don’t have to, I want to

Rio: But do you only want to because you have no other option

Rio: you’d prefer it if I was fun and free, I would

Buster: I’d prefer to be with you in your worst mood than some other random, hypothetical girl who’s allegedly fun and carefree

Buster: you can’t control how I feel about you any more than you can what’s happening to you right now, neither are going away

Rio: It scares me how much I love you

Buster: I know, but that’s because it’s real, we’re able to fake it with anyone else, we don’t have the option with each other

Rio: I want you to be happy and I don’t know what I’ll do if I can’t make you happy

Buster: You can

Rio: I’ll try too, really hard

Buster: It’ll be worth it

Rio: I’m not worried about that, just failing

Buster: You don’t need to worry about that either

Rio: I want us to be together, not having it meant it couldn’t be taken away before

Buster: We are, and we’ll make it work

Rio: However we have to

Buster: I swear

Rio: Me too

Buster: I won’t ask you to spit this time, you have friends waiting

Rio: I don’t want to leave you

Buster: I meant it, message me whenever and I’ll answer, it doesn’t matter how late, where you are or how wasted

Rio: Well, I’ll hold you to that

Rio: but I don’t need to get wasted now

Buster: If you want to stay in, we can

Rio: You should still go work out, for your benefit and mine

Rio: but I’m staying with you

Buster: I’ll do it at home instead

Rio: You sure?

Rio: You can go, I really don’t mind

Buster: You can really stay with me here, we’ll be alone

Rio: Being alone is obviously the ideal so I’m not going to argue

Buster: Don’t, we’ve argued enough for today

Rio: 😞😖

Rio: Don’t

Buster: Be my good girl again and I won’t need to

Rio: Let me make it up to you

Buster: That sounds nice

Rio: You’re nice, the nicest boy I’ve ever known

Buster: To you and nobody else

Rio: Tell me how I can be nice to you back

Buster: You’re going to cheer me on

Rio: Easy, it comes naturally to me like winning does to you

Buster: Watching me’ll feel natural once I let you do it more

Rio: Right now it feels like I’m doing what I’m always doing

Rio: trying not to get caught staring

Buster: That’s exactly what you’re about to do

Rio: Don’t you need someone to spot you, safety first

Buster: First of all though, I need to know how far you got getting ready

Rio: [send him a picture giving in your underwear because clearly not far enough to have picked an outfit and that’s also clearly what he’s suggesting]

Buster: I knew it, seeing you like that would’ve caught me dangerously off guard if I’d hit call without asking

Rio: I can put my gym clothes on if that makes you more comfortable but it’s not really much more coverage

Buster: You stay comfortable, babe

Rio: You call me when you’re ready

Rio: I’ll have to invest in some actual pom-poms, [whatever you used before] isn’t giving the fantasy hard enough

Buster: [obviously sending her links to the full outfits like which one is giving the fantasy because he is about to online shop that, excuse us everyone, 1000% has searched for ones that closely match his team colours]

Rio: The colours are best on [option] but the outfit [another] is cuter in general, what do you think?

Buster: [do another search to see if you can find one that’s as cute as the one she likes but has better colours than it, you are that determined, I believe you would end up messaging someone to literally make her one bespoke if necessary as if money is no object when it isn’t yours to be spending yet lol, so show her a screenshot of said request and the person agreeing to do it]

Rio: Oh my God

Rio: I’ll wear it to all your matches, make it worth it

Buster: [show her that you’ve also ordered lingerie in whatever colour to go under it because of course you have, baze don’t look at his purchases thank you cos we’ll blame Nancy if we have to haha]

Rio: How did you guess my size like that?

Buster: I’ve barely taken my eyes off that picture since you sent it

Rio: [send him more]

Buster: You’re so distracting

Rio: Coming from you

Rio: I can barely wait to model these clothes for you

Buster: Yeah coming from me, I have a workout to do

Rio: Alright, no more pictures until you’ve done [idk what the different measurements mean tbh but like reps and sets, that jazz]

Buster: [call her and start your slutty lil workout sir with your phone set up at the best angle, as if you needed to prove that you’re doing as many as requested and aren’t showing her this entire sesh just because, when we all know you’ve picked whatever will make you sweat most and make the most noise about it, idk about how boys do gym stuff but I know you’re an extra bitch]

Rio: [lowkey just a pair of 👀s you’re that close to your phone watching him do this, trying not to breathe because you know you could be making your own noises so easily about how good he looks]

Buster: [lord, this workout going on forever, again as if you need to prove how much stamina you have and how strong you are and everything and aren’t just flirting and edging this entire time, nobody else need to use any of this equipment please, his curls when he’s all sweaty though, BYE]

Rio: [at least you can give him all the compliments about how strong he is so you’re not fully silent, trying to give compliments that you could feasibly give him in a ‘platonic’ way even though NOTHING about this is at all and we all know it, the wurls, PLEASE ‘will you workout with me when I come over?’]

Buster: [so so shamelessly motivated by and going harder from every single compliment in such unsubtle ways, here we are being ridiculously loud yet again and throwing out every workout cliche we possibly can including drinking water sluttily and pouring it over himself, talking about how he’s literally gonna workout with her by using her body to, benchpressing her or whatever, I don’t know all the technical terms but picking her up and using her like a weight and shit, breathless af whispering when he’s saying all of this obvs for the contrast to his !! noises moreso than worrying about anyone hearing him]

Rio: [couldn’t be more blatant that your goal isn’t just to motivate him but turn him on here, doing the most with double meaning and what is conveyed through your STARING and the little noises you make when he’s describing how he’s going to workout with you]

Buster: [mhmm and it couldn’t be more blatant that it’s working even if boys gym clothes aren’t as skimpy as girls are, still very noticeable rn physically, all your insane breathing and noises aside, but they too are cray, especially how dramatic they get whenever he can maintain eye contact with her while still managing to workout]

Rio: [the biting of your lip when eye contact happens will be insane, so glad no one else is in/near this gym rn because failing to keep your encouragement sounding remotely platonic at this point, we know it]

Buster: [we’re all very glad because this boy is out here just fully MOANING at this point as he’s demo-ing everything he said he’d do with something that we’re all allowing to be an approximate stand in for her for those purposes, doing the most lifting it and everything etc etc, running his mouth talking about it, giving her encouragement too as if she’s really here and part of it]

Rio: [not you timing all your noises to his like you really are getting a workout too, you feel like it, just unhinged things]

Buster: [oh lads, never change, the way I know this is going on for SUCH a long time but it cannot last forever, you will both eventually die even though you aren’t touching yourselves or anything]

Rio: [shook to your core in the best way, catching your breath like did that actually just happen]

Buster: [absolutely, find this boy completely DEAD, lying there so sweaty and so flushed, GASPING for breath, his hand shaking and thus the phone when he’s recovered enough he can finally reach for it to bring it closer to his face and just LOOK at her for a second from the floor]

Rio: [biggest heart eyes you have ever, reaching out your hand like you can stroke his face casually, before unwholesomely, and unsteadily, telling him what you would do to him if you were there whilst he’s basically incapacitated, nbd]

Buster: [iconic and he’s here for it all, hence his smile at her being cute turning into a grin at her being unwholesome and then turning into a hot lol when he tells her what he’d do in retaliation, giving never that incapacitated that he wouldn’t still do xyz]

Rio: [grinning back at him insanely but adorably because so in love with him and everything about this ‘do you feel better?’ because of course, giving this is what you needed]

Buster: [likewise in love so give her the hearteyes back with your ‘don’t you?’ because they both clearly do] 

Rio: [nodding shyly as if nows the time for you to be all coy lol, covering yourself more with your duvet]

Buster: [doing a smug smile like mhmm I know you do and of course you do because no denying what just happened was slay, running a hand through his wurls just cos I can]

Rio: [‘you should thank your mama’ shoutout those curls Beatrice, not seen on either of your sisters lmao, unlucky]

Buster: [soz ladies, though not that soz to Ava because she’s done especially amazing out of those genetics ‘you should’ because lol, imagine Rio having that convo with Bea like thanks for your hot son]

Rio: [neither of you is struggling but he is his mother’s double in a way I think is very adorable as a boy ANYWAY, shaking your head and giggling because truly imagine ‘are you gonna thank mine?’]

Buster: [so do I which is why I simply cannot change his face even though the IRL boy is never giving and continues to flop, but anyway, the confidence with which he says ‘put her on’ like yeah sure makes me laugh as if he is gonna thank Ali and also genuinely ask how long Rio is allowed to stay for half term]

Rio: [raising your brows like ‘right now?’ because y’all are a STATE, him especially, obviously you’re not actually going to bother your mother but you are amused nonetheless by his attitude]

Buster: [a nod like yep as if she has dared him to do this and he accepts because he knows damn well he looks GOOD rn despite and because of looking a state and y’all are into it as well as playing this game of doing the most in front of the fam at all times]

Rio: [‘can you not flirt with my mum in front of me’ rolling your eyes like ugh, you but then you are right back to appreciating how he looks right now because there’s no denying it]

Buster: [‘as long as I can flirt with you in front of both our mums’ because duh what y’all really want only and always, LOOKING back at her as appreciatively even though she covered up slightly and there isn’t as much to see]

Rio: [‘why change the habit of a lifetime?’ stretching dramatically, partly because that was a lot but partly to uncover yourself a little to tease him some more along with your words]

Buster: [in the spirit of what she said and what she did, taking off whatever top he had put on to workout when he thought he was leaving the house to do so and therefore couldn’t stay in the pjs from earlier, because that doesn’t count as spoilers really, she’d have seen him topless before, in pics definitely and likely irl too if ireland was ever hot enough in the summer, giving that you gotta because you’re so hot and sweaty and so in need of a shower but really just yet again flirting and not changing the habit of a lifetime]

Rio: [mhmm, like I’m sure you posted a bikini pic before now so it isn’t really different even though the vibe so clearly is, we can pretend not lol, here saying ‘you’re so gross’ like you said you’re so hot, tone and words not matching at all]

Buster: [‘you’re so cruel’ likewise because we mean the absolute opposite of that, no notes]

Rio: [‘I can’t stand looking at you, go shower’ actually true, you’re already getting turned on again like you didn’t just die in spectacular fashion because just want to be there so bad, waving at him adorably though because you can’t let yourself watch him in the shower but you wanna so 🥺]

Buster: [actually do get up and walk to it because there is 100% a shower down here with the gym stuff logistically, taking her with you like you’re gonna let her watch the same way you did that workout but then he’s deliberately positioning it so she cannot see him as requested but not ending the call so she can hear this shower run and the humming he’s doing of some song that they both like as he waits to get into it]

Rio: [not breathing as you go on this walk for him and wait to see what he’s doing, because could have hung up yourself but have not because you want to know how far this is going to go, obviously, making your breath out a dramatic sigh like he’s forgotten to hang up and you’re like oh my god, clearing your throat, TOTALLY not because you need to but in a faux reminding you I’m here way]

Buster: [obviously taking a sec to turn whatever towel you’re intending to use into a swan and ‘accidentally’ leaving it in her field of phone screen vision to let her know that you haven’t forgotten her]

Rio: [the noise you do when you do a very big smile, a happy noise, so even if he’s not looking at the screen right now off camera, he’ll still know ‘are you going to show me this shower too when I’m there?’ because no need for a pretence now, just like think about it with me]

Buster: [let her know you’ve really thought about it by basically giving her an itinerary of how they can use every bath and shower in this gaff at different points, the vibes being a bubble bath to pamper her pre getting into her costume and ready, a shower to get the body paint off, one when they workout etc etc, fully planning out this visit in a way I’m not gonna actually commit us to but that kind of thing]

Rio: [‘I don’t have to think of anything’ because shook by how much he’s planned this even though you know he’s that boy about things like his sports and school, obviously not the energy your boyfriends were bringing to the table]

Buster: [his own kind of happy noise because that’s what he wants, her not to have to think about anything just be taken care of and completely pampered and spoiled this entire time every moment that he possibly can, giving like a satisfied sigh/sound that he’s doing a good job energy, I imagine]

Rio: [‘you’ll know how much I appreciate you’ giving you don’t yet but you’re going to, I promise]

Buster: [another confident ‘yeah’ as he gets into this shower like I know how much you’ll appreciate this gal even without seeing me because we all know it’s a phone of the future he can bring in and is even if it’s still aimed so she only gets visuals that are more teasing than him out here fully naked, doing the most from the off with how he wipes water and steam off the screen and makes eye contact with her in a very close up manner for a sec before he sets said phone up]

Rio: [‘baby’ as a very real moan/groan, but quietly enough that if he wasn’t that close to the phone at the time he wouldn’t have heard over the shower because you didn’t even mean to do it out loud you just had to]

Buster: [‘you’re the baby’ because she is, however much he LOVED hearing that just then because of how obvious it is that she couldn’t help it, keeping his face as close to this phone almost with how it’s positioned and he’s running his wurls under the water, obviously deliberately making as much of a song and dance of it as when he poured water on himself during the workout, like he’s in a herbal essences porny ad]

Rio: [encouraging him again like he’s working out because love that he’s unapologetically into being sexy when straight lads are usually too embarrassed or toxically masculine to be about that life and we love to see it honey ‘feel like I could get pregnant right now’ like boy you better stop but don’t ever]

Buster: [the way his ‘not yet’ is unrepentantly giving the same but you’re going to, I promise vibes that she did moments ago because we all know that it isn’t a not ever even at this point]

Rio: [doing the lil laugh that you do when you can’t believe what’s just been said but you’re not mad about it or about to pretend to be]

Buster: [be washing your face like it’s casual when it is nothing of the sort and you’re 1000% going to spit water at her as the promise you absolutely didn’t need to make that you mean that and also to be extra as hell as per, we can all pretend it is playful to go with her lol but it is not]

Rio: [opening your mouth most uncasually and doing the biggest swallow ever too because both committing to this extraness always and could not be more into all of this shamelessly]

Buster: [making the most uncasual sound ever as you watch this, because you just have to for all the same reasons]

Rio: [moving to get your own phone set up to show you’re getting down on your knees on the floor to watch him right now, doing it silently like nbd because you know he’s watching you too]

Buster: [dramatically begin to wash your body the most thoroughly and indecently that anyone has ever, obvs, gotta give her a show back on the limited parts of your body that you’re letting her see from the angle you’ve given]

Rio: [‘do you like being watched?’ as a genuine question despite the levels of distracted you are because you very much do and it would seem like he’s in the same boat]

Buster: [‘It’s love’ like the distinction is super important and she needs to know that you’re that into it with no grey area as if there was any doubt right here and right now with these antics]

Rio: [nodding ferociously like yeah it is ‘you love what you can do without touch, how little you have to do to elicit such big reactions’]

Buster: [his own nod as they hold such INSANE eye contact because they both know that in itself can do so much and is really proving her point]

Rio: [when biting your lip isn’t enough to stifle the reaction you’re having to this EYE CONTACT ‘I love talking to people after I’ve talked to you, it’s like they know how hard my nipples are and how wet I am for you but they’re not allowed to be the ones to bring it up’]

Buster: [running his tongue over the lip he bit earlier and has probably swelled up slightly as a result, really drawing extra attention to it like remember when ‘you love trying to form any coherent words when everyone knows your mouth is full of saliva and your head is completely empty’]

Rio: [copying how he’s licking his lips instinctively but it is also showing how full of saliva your mouth truly is right now, nodding ‘I want people to know, what you do to me, what you always have’]

Buster: [opening his mouth instinctively at how full hers is because would love nothing more than for her to spit into it ofc ‘your eyes get so big when you look at me’ because she is her mother’s daughter]

Rio: [do spit even though you are not in the shower so you’re just making a mess but you simply gotta ‘it’s so obvious’ shaking your head because thanks eyes for that dead giveaway but also smh at everyone for not noticing lol]

Buster: [doing such an obvious moan but it’s not deliberately timed to prove how blatant they are he just has to at the mess she’s making cos so into it ‘a touch of your wrist’ because this boy loves a wrist grab always and that’s all it takes to feel her pulse going absolutely insane]

Rio: [‘we can do so much with so little’ practically in a gasp as if he did just grab your wrist and take you by surprise then and you’re not just !!]

Buster: [‘you’re that little I could pick you up and carry you’ because true and you’re THINKING about it thanks to that reaction and the one you know she would make if you did]

Rio: [‘can’ as the correction it is because you simply must now you’ve made us think about it too, accidentally making yourself smaller by the way you have to hug yourself to stop yourself falling from kneeling]

Buster: [‘will’ as a further correction because simply must is too accurate yep, doing his own gasp in a concerned dad kind of way at her almost falling ‘promise me you’ll be careful until then, baby’ because really gotta bring the daddy energy, giving that he will be carrying her around everywhere at all times]

Rio: [steadying yourself with great difficulty because he’s being so indecently daddy about it and that only makes you wanna die more but you have to so you can LOOK at him and ‘promise’]

Buster: [maintaining the most indecent eye contact of all time as he says ‘Who are you promising to?’ because gotta be more daddy and always gotta push it further so literally like address me specifically rn immediately please and thank you]

Rio: [demonstrating your big eyes right now in full force because how could you not, he’s killing you ‘I’m promising to you, Buster’]

Buster: [giving her good girl energy via his LOOK because never breaking this eye contact however big her eyes get lol ‘say it again, who am I?’ because the opportunity we gotta give her here to say the absolute most and likewise be getting killed by it]

Rio: [‘Buster’ like you know exactly what you’re doing right now boy because he do and you are not okay about it and how badly you wanna say so much shit you are barely holding back]

Buster: [letting her know exactly what he is doing rn because it’s unmistakable and even with the shower still running he’s going hard enough with touching himself that she can hear everything she can’t see, actually letting himself moan her name in response the way he wanted but was not allowed to earlier]

Rio: [pressing your face into your shoulder so you muffle the moans you make in reaction, but only muffle them in a way to make more of them, obviously ‘Am I allowed?’]

Buster: [‘Show me’ because she ended the call before and he didn’t get the full moment that she got so yes, absolutely must to redeem that]

Rio: [moving your phone down to show more of your body so this is as explicit as it can be whilst leaving your pants on because going for this like you’ve been waiting FOREVER]

Buster: [swearing about it like he expected to NEVER see it because we’re as !! about this, giving her all the praise and encouragement that he could possibly with his unwavering STARE as he watches this and the sounds he is making in response as he goes for it too, definitely calling her a goddess for the first time most importantly]

Rio: [gobsmacked doesn’t begin to cover it because the way you can tell he isn’t even a little taking the piss and is saying it so sincerely has you feeling as if you really could have fainted and are definitely dreaming right now, which makes it far easier for his name to come spilling out your mouth like you’re stuck on a loop]

Buster: [me like stfu sir because you’re gonna leave me with nothing to say when y’all are together IRL at this rate firstly, but he will never, and secondly, you should defs be shhing her because she does not have the shower running and isn’t in the basement so her fam could easily hear her but he likewise will never, instead he’s only encouraging this by saying her name back every single time she says his, along with every extra ass other thing he has called her so far being likewise repeated along with how beautiful she is and what a good girl etc and calling her his gf and all the things cos we’re incoherently and ferally rambling in this moment]

Rio: [you know we gotta crack and call you daddy, there is no avoiding it, nor can you avoid how you’re all but undressing yourself with the way you are GRABBING at your body the way you want him to be, I can only assume and hope your family are busy because you aren’t paying any attention to not being beyond blatant with what you’re doing and with who lol] 

Buster: [god bless truly, the way he tells her to cum for him when she calls him daddy in such a daddy tone turning into cum with me really fast with such a !! tone because everything she is doing is absolutely sending him and he’s dying about it all, we stan]

Rio: [‘don’t let it wash away’ so dramatically like it’s life or death but you’re just in those feral hours and you need to see how much he’s cum when he has, pulling back from touching yourself for 0.5 seconds to make this last a fraction longer because now you can’t stop calling him daddy over and over like you did his name]

Buster: [getting his face up in the phone’s grill for a sec to show her that his lip is inevitably bleeding again because of all these antics like it was a deliberate act on his part to promise that he won’t let the jizz go down the drain instead of just accidental feralness more likely, I’m sure you are 1000% convinced it was deliberate and this promise is equally life and death in this moment tbf, calling her baby and my baby over and over to match the vibe, obvs]

Rio: [‘swallow it all and I promise you I’ll never waste any either’ rushing and tripping over these words because got to get them out before you lose grip here, whilst leaving actual grip marks on your waist hard enough to bruise because you have to be taking out at least some of your insane feralness with being ridiculously rough with this or you’d be too loud and you’re obviously just loud enough for him to hear in reality even if you think you’re screaming]

Buster: [we all know he will with 0 hesitation and he’ll let her see it all when he does because he’s 100% that bitch and these really are feral hours, I have no notes about it, just unhinged behaviour]

Rio: [at least you can cum for him about this in the most unhinged way too because just confirming y’all are made for each other with what that did to you there, the girl is dead, which is a good excuse to cut the call by accident when you go to pick up the phone in your still way too dead state because obsessed with him]

Rio: Sorry, I’m shaking

Rio: maybe it really does make you blind, Jesus

Rio: I’m not sorry if that’s the last thing I get to see, you’re fucking incredible

Buster: I’ll forgive you, considering the mental image you left me with was as incredible

Buster: and I can tell you really didn’t mean to disconnect

Rio: I didn’t last time either

Rio: I’d talk to you all day every day if I could

Buster: You can, you’re my girlfriend, remember

Rio: You might’ve mentioned

Buster: Then you shouldn’t need another reminder already, but as I’ve also mentioned, I’m in a generous mood

Rio: What does that mean? 

Buster: What would you most like it to?

Rio: Tell me what we’re going to do next

Buster: It’s your turn to get all cleaned up

Rio: That has probably become a necessity, yeah

Buster: Go and run a bath with lots of bubbles, like I promised you once you’re here

Rio: Cross your fingers I can find a free bathroom

Buster: I’ll click them

Rio: Don’t be a cliche, babe

Buster: I can’t deny you what you want

Rio: I’ve got a pretty good chance now, is the depressing reality

Rio: no need to waste wishes

Buster: Wishes aren’t going to be in short supply for either of us, that’s our reality now

Rio: You’re cute

Buster: Yeah, that’s our reality as well

Rio: That’s not new

Buster: It’s new that you’re allowed to say so

Rio: True, it’s the last thing I’d say when you were being a dick to me

Buster: But still the first thing you’d think

Rio: Depending

Rio: Always in the top 3

Buster: Yet more proof we’re soulmates

Rio: Yeah, you think you’re pretty cute too

Buster: I know it, with the same conviction as I’ve always known you are

Rio: Does it stop you being scared?

Buster: What would I have to be afraid of?

Rio: There’s too much to list, never mind tempting fate

Buster: There isn’t, don’t worry

Rio: Oh yeah, that’s true and it’s that easy

Buster: For me, naturally

Rio: You expect me to just believe that like everyone else now I’m your girlfriend?

Buster: What I say? Absolutely

Rio: Hmm

Buster: You know I expect you to behave yourself 

Rio: Didn’t I do just what you asked me to?

Rio: [send a lil clip of your bath running like still am]

Buster: Because wings and a halo aren’t meaningless halloween accessories to you, you’re my angel all the time, and you take it very seriously

Rio: You deserve nothing less

Rio: You treat me so well I don’t even know how to act but I know how much you like me good

Buster: You deserve nothing less, your other boyfriends should be taught how to act

Rio: They’re all history 

Rio: It doesn’t matter how they act 

Buster: Yeah they are, it does matter how they’ve made you think though

Rio: They’ve not made me think any type of way

Buster: For their own sakes, they better not have

Rio: Yeah?

Buster: Without question

Rio: Shall I be flattered or do you just enjoy hitting people?

Buster: Shall I repeat that I’m not a sociopath?

Rio: Say it too much and it’s going to sound like overcompensating, baby

Rio: You’re far too sweet to be emotionless

Buster: Maybe I’m manipulating yours, a classic move, it could be argued

Rio: Thanks for that

Rio: A nice thought to mull over in my bath…

Buster: Think about me hitting all of your exes instead

Rio: We’d have to discuss what counts as an ex

Rio: some of them really didn’t get enough from our time together to deserve all that

Buster: It isn’t up for debate, anybody who didn’t treat you well, that’s the only criteria

Rio: None of them were that bad, honestly

Buster: Spoilsport

Rio: Sorry

Rio: If I’d loved any of them properly maybe you’d be allowed

Buster: If you’d loved them, this wouldn’t be a hypothetical discussion, I’d have already beat the shit out of them all for that alone

Rio: You’ve never been in love with any of them either, have you?

Buster: Of course not

Rio: You could have, I don’t know

Buster: No I couldn’t, don’t be ridiculous

Rio: Don’t call me ridiculous

Buster: It’s a ridiculous thought, you know that

Rio: I’m sure some of them were pretty

Buster: Their appearances are irrelevant

Rio: I’m not going to make you talk about specific people, don’t worry

Buster: I’d struggle to recall many specific details, I told you, I pictured you

Rio: Every time?

Buster: Always

Rio: If I’m not 100% convinced, that’s me not you

Buster: There’s no denying it sounds like a line

Rio: You’re a little too good to be true

Rio: and I suppose you are, taking into account the obvious

Buster: It’s a little depressing, that’s how you can be sure I’m telling the truth

Rio: No, it would be depressing

Rio: if you didn’t get to see what you just saw

Buster: Thankfully, I did

Rio: And I’ll really be there next time

Rio: providing you don’t hook up with anyone in the next [however long is left]

Buster: No one else, but next time was presumptuous when we have [however long]

Buster: I could make you cum [however many] times between now and then

Rio: A complete ban would be insanity 

Rio: You’d never make it, boy

Buster: Because I refuse to, as you said, the idea’s insane

Buster: were there any benefits whatsoever, I could easily wait for you, I’m practised at it

Rio: Wait for me, not wait to cum

Rio: School nights, at best, don’t try to kid me

Buster: I’m not kidding, go ahead and dare me

Rio: No, I’d miss you 

Buster: Think about that in your bath

Rio: [send him a picture of your legs in this bubble bath rn]

Buster: I do miss you

Rio: I could be laid on your chest if you were here

Buster: You’d have to lie on me for both of us to fit in there

Rio: I’d make you comfy

Buster: Yeah?

Rio: Of course

Rio: I don’t need lots of room

Buster: You need to listen to my heartbeat telling you how comfortable I am

Rio: I want you to feel at home

Buster: When we live together I’ll have a bathtub custom built for us, exactly as you want

Rio: Where would we live?

Buster: The possibilities are endless, a house in every place that’s almost as beautiful as you are, perhaps

Rio: I don’t think I want to stay in America, when you’re done with school

Buster: It’s too far from everyone else you love

Rio: You too

Buster: By the time I’m finished with school, Ava could be intending to go anywhere herself, I can’t plan for that

Rio: That’s true of everyone

Buster: As long as she still loves me, she’ll stay in touch regardless

Rio: Of course she will

Buster: We don’t know that any of them will

Rio: That’s why it’s a bad idea to talk about the future

Buster: But it’s an equally impossible ban, not to

Rio: I know but

Rio: we’ll only hurt ourselves

Buster: Okay, because the last thing I want to do is hurt you

Rio: There’s enough for us to look forward to in the immediate future

Buster: You’re right, there is

Rio: Are your parents away for your party, what’s the vibe?

Buster: [tell her what the vibe is, I assume baze are because wouldn’t be much of a party otherwise with y’all chilling and feasible because y’all do work a lot so maybe you’re away for the weekend or at least part of it, that would track]

Rio: I have time to practice looking innocent in front of them then, that’s good

Buster: You can practise on me, show me your best innocent face

Rio: [do, ofc, what is 🥺 if not that]

Buster: That is good, angel

Rio: How can I be better?

Buster: You’re perfect

Rio: You really can’t tell how many times you’ve made me cum today?

Buster: I can, but they won’t be able to

Rio: You better be aware

Buster: How many bruises did you give yourself for me to look out for?

Rio: My hips feel like two giant bruises 

Rio: I hope I haven’t covered myself in them

Buster: I’ll have to bathe you in ice next time

Rio: I do not like the sound of that

Buster: I’d need you to swear you wouldn’t scream the house down before I lifted you in

Rio: Are you going to warm me up after?

Buster: Promise

Rio: Maybe then

Rio: but I want you to kiss every bruise still

Buster: I’ll make you wish you were covered

Rio: Cover me

Buster: Every inch of you

Rio: I’m yours, that needs to be visible

Buster: I need to see it in more than just your eyes

Rio: I’ll write your name on my body

Buster: So will I

Rio: Where?

Buster: Everywhere

Rio: I could be quiet, I swear

Rio: short skirt and no underwear, I’m yours in front of anyone

Buster: I know you could

Rio: I need you like that, all the time

Buster: Deep inside you, any place and time

Rio: We’ve been apart too long, you should have always been that close

Buster: We’ll fix that, I’m not letting you further than [however big he’s just out here telling her his dick is nbd] inches from me

Rio: My daddy

Rio: write your name on me that big

Buster: Write yours on me there

Rio: All for me?

Buster: Completely

Rio: I can’t stop thinking about your body, how you looked [doing a specific workout] and then in the shower after

Buster: Don’t stop

Rio: All my thoughts are you

Buster: [talk about in GRAPHIC detail the things you’d be doing to her body rn if you were there, letting her know you’d almost drown because we all know his fave thing is eating her out like it’s his job and that’s where the kissing her bruises better thoughts have devolved to obvs]

Rio: Your handsome face underneath me…

Rio: you might drown as easy out of the tub

Buster: I’ll take the risk

Rio: You like to do that, for real?

Buster: Take risks? You know I do

Rio: You know what I’m talking about

Buster: I haven’t done it before, but I’d like to

Rio: You’re the angel, not me

Buster: No I’m not

Rio: You are to me, so special

Buster: I want you to feel special

Rio: I do, whenever I’m with you

Buster: And I want to be with you so badly

Rio: It aches, being separated, it’ll be worse but I wouldn’t change anything

Buster: Yeah, my head, my chest, my lap

Rio: We’ll be together, I’ll give anything to be with you 

Buster: I’ll do anything to keep you with me

Rio: I can’t really picture the future without you, you’re so necessary to everything I want

Buster: I wouldn’t have one, there’d be too many compromises, it’s not an option

Rio: I know how you feel about compromises

Buster: You know how I feel about you

Rio: Yes

Buster: My throat aches now too

Rio: I’m kissing it better, as soon as I see you, with everywhere else you needed

Buster: It’s been forever since you kissed me

Rio: Too long

Rio: Until our lips go numb is a good start at making it up

Buster: Until I make yours bleed as much as mine

Rio: Please

Buster: And until you lose your voice saying that

Rio: There’s so much to tell you

[punkscowardschampions]

Ruster pt.3

Rio: If I could, I’d have you in my life like that, it isn’t fair to make that me doing that when it’s just impossible

Buster: I’d make all of it my business, make myself however unpopular, that’s what it means to be on your side all the time, to have your best interests at heart instead of taking a passing interest in the things you don’t deem too personal

Rio: That doesn’t include me asking you to give up your family, how could I ever do that to you

Buster: You wouldn’t, but if I had to do it without being asked, then that’s my decision

Rio: You don’t have to, you said it, we can have it all

Buster: Nothing is impossible, you shouldn’t say that

Rio: But we don’t have to think of that right now

Rio: it’s only a maybe, if people found out

Buster: Options exist, that’s how I think

Rio: I just don’t want this ruined by attempts to be 5 steps ahead when we should be enjoying now

Buster: Now is ruined by you believing I’m a patronising twat

Rio: Behaving like isn’t being

Rio: Can’t we call a truce now?

Buster: You tell me

Rio: I don’t want you at arm's length

Buster: Where do you want me?

Rio: By my side

Buster: Unless your dad’s on the other

Rio: He isn’t

Buster: And I’m not going to hit him if he is, I do have some self-control 

Rio: You have the most of anyone I know

Buster: Losing it wasn’t an option

Rio: I know

Rio: but you can with me

Buster: Can I?

Rio: I’m not going anywhere

Buster: The truce could, I want it to last

Rio: Even if we argue, I still care about you, want the best for you, you don’t need to doubt that ever

Buster: I don’t know how to walk on eggshells, I doubt I’m capable

Rio: You don’t have to

Buster: Don’t I?

Rio: Buster, I get it

Rio: but how often are we realistically discussing my dad?

Buster: If you’re being realistic, don’t pretend your dad is the beginning and end of the problem

Rio: Do we have to agree on everything?

Buster: No, but on the important things, we should

Rio: What are the important things?

Buster: It’s more important for you to tell me my place and keep me there than it is to make space for me

Rio: No it’s not

Buster: Something else we don’t agree on then

Rio: If that’s how I’ve made you feel

Rio: then it’s for the best we leave this

Buster: You’re always quick to tell me that’s for the best, how else am I supposed to feel?

Rio: I’m not going to see you treated like that, no more than I’m willing to be the one doing it

Rio: If that’s how it is then I have to see how it happened

Buster: But you’re willing to give up?

Rio: I clearly don’t know how to do this, treat you right

Buster: How is walking away better?

Rio: Better than putting you in a box until I need you?

Buster: Than trying

Rio: I am trying, I have been this whole time

Buster: Stop trying to leave me when I need you too

Rio: Just tell me I’m not a terrible person please

Buster: I’ve told you, you’re my favourite person, repeatedly

Rio: Still?

Buster: I clearly can’t turn it on and off

Rio: Don’t sound that devastated about it

Buster: I’m not, but I’m devastated you’re not here, we wouldn’t be talking ourselves into bullshit knots if we were in the same room

Rio: It’s so simple when we let it be

Buster: And frustrating when I don’t

Rio: Seeing you and you not talking to me properly is a specific kind of torture only you can inflict on me

Buster: It’s still the worst, arguably, but this is up there, not being able to see you until [however long]

Rio: I was sure you were going to tell me not to come

Buster: No, I can’t let myself do that

Rio: I promise I’ll show no matter what

Buster: You have to

Rio: Even if all you want to do is fight with me in person, I’d rather that than not be with you 

Buster: All I want to do is make up with you in person

Rio: I have to make you believe how much I want you in my life

Buster: Show me

Rio: I’m going to post so everyone knows I’m spending the entire time with you

Rio: and I’m asking you to come visit before my birthday

Buster: You know I’d visit every weekend before your birthday if that’s what you want

Rio: Of course it is

Rio: I want to see you whenever we can

Buster: I’ll be there whenever I can

Rio: Be my best friend

Buster: I’ll be your new boyfriend

Rio: Do you mean it?

Buster: You can be my first girlfriend, there’s nobody else I’d rather have

Rio: You’re going to be my last boyfriend

Rio: I’ve never wanted anything else

Buster: I’m going to visit next weekend and take you on a date

Rio: Sleepover too, you don’t need to be alone at yours 

Rio: Where are we going, is it a surprise?

Buster: Where we go depends on what I find to dress you in when we’re shopping

Rio: How pretty you can make me

Buster: But I’ll definitely buy you something for the sleepover

Rio: I bet you have the softest pyjamas

Buster: You can borrow them after the party

Rio: I better avoid using body paint for my costume then

Buster: I bitterly regret not being the kind of rich cliche who has everything they own monogrammed, you’d look beautiful wearing my initials on you

Rio: Real oversight

Rio: Going to have to fix that for you, that’s a present down though

Buster: Do you need all of my measurements?

Rio: Tempting

Rio: but I bet I can guess, which is also a fun game so I’m torn

Buster: Fun to guess right, potentially lethal to my ego should you overestimate

Rio: I’ve spent a lot of time studying you

Buster: Feel free to estimate roughly how much time, I won’t be upset about any incorrect guesses or maths there

Rio: [do make a guess that’s giving forever based on how old you are, how often etc, using some maths I’m not doing thank you]

Buster: As I expected, upset isn’t the word

Rio: You don’t need to worry for your ego, you’re the definition of perfect

Buster: Were a picture of me in the dictionary for that purpose, I’d be stood next to you

Rio: I don’t know what to do with a boyfriend this charming, not going to lie

Buster: You may not know what to say, but you know exactly what to do

Rio: True

Rio: being able to stop when we have to is going to be the issue

Buster: Even more true

Rio: You can talk to me every day, that’s a girlfriend perk

Buster: All day and all night

Rio: Whenever you need and whenever you want

Rio: no need to pretend otherwise now

Buster: No going back to pretences 

Rio: I can’t

Buster: How did we keep such bullshit up for so long?

Rio: It felt necessary, everything felt more important than it’s been shown to be

Buster: Life’s too short

Rio: It was the catalyst, to go for it

Rio: but you know it runs so much deeper, further back than anything else, don’t you

Buster: Yeah, further back than a dare, despite that being another catalyst

Rio: Exactly

Rio: We haven’t had a collective breakdown, no one can accuse us of that

Buster: Folie a deux could be thrown around, but I know I’m not delusional

Rio: Maintaining it for this long, through the changes that have happened to us both, it has to count for something

Buster: That, and you are stunning, I challenge anyone to so much as half-heartedly disagree with me, even to try and prove a point

Rio: How is it fair that I’m not supposed to acknowledge your attractiveness when I’ve been around it the longest

Buster: It’s unfair and you’ve been so good for ages

Buster: I’m proud of you, everyone should be

Rio: As long as you’re proud of me, I don’t care how anyone else feels about it

Buster: I am, very

Rio: 🥺

Rio: You make me proud 

Buster: I haven’t resisted a single temptation, you know that I can’t

Rio: I want you to give in to them, only with me

Buster: With you and for you, all of it

Rio: I feel like any minute now this is all going to be taken from me

Rio: I’m dreaming or you’re joking

Buster: But it won’t and we’re not, this is yours

Buster: to keep

Rio: You are, mine

Buster: You’re mine, I’m older, I saw you first

Rio: I bet your eyes weren’t even open, boy

Buster: Of course they were

Rio: Mhmm, and you were walking and talking too, wonderchild

Buster: Not yet, but before you

Rio: You’re gonna make this a competition, now?

Rio: I will scroll that far back on our mamas’ socials, don’t test me 

Buster: Do it, I’ll win

Rio: You’ll owe me the time I can’t get back

Buster: You’ll beat Nancy, then again, your newborn sister’ll learn to read before she does, so

Rio: Don’t be mean

Buster: Why not? She owes me more than scrolling time I can’t get back

Rio: She can’t help being dyslexic, there’s plenty else she can that you could comment on

Buster: Fine, but I’m not convinced she wouldn’t fake dyslexia for the attention

Buster: it’s supposed to run in families but surprise, surprise, none of us have a diagnosis

Rio: If anything you’d be impressed by the dedication to the con at this point

Buster: It’d be an explanation of where her dedication has been going, yeah, because there’s no evidence anywhere else

Rio: You know you’re ahead of the curve, you said so earlier

Rio: I’m sure she’ll work it all out before she needs to

Buster: And I was as a baby, I should’ve insisted you make a proper bet

Rio: You know you can have anything from me

Buster: I wish we could both have that time back, do things differently from the first chance we had

Rio: I know

Rio: Maybe we would have broken each other’s hearts

Buster: There’s still that maybe now

Rio: Of course, it’ll always be there but I mean, we could hate each other by now

Buster: I could never hate you

Rio: I couldn’t bear that, don’t, no matter what

Buster: Honestly, even in a hypothetical where I wanted to, once I’ve calmed down, I can’t, I understand you too well, why you chose to do whatever you did, how your mind works

Rio: You know me better than anyone, that can’t be broken or taken away

Rio: My other boyfriends, I feel like even the best of couldn’t say ten true things about me

Buster: Your other boyfriends aren’t worth mentioning, nor worthy of the title itself, none of them were ever going to be good enough for you

Rio: I’ve barely had any in the way you’re thinking, anyway

Rio: it was just kids stuff, harmless fun

Buster: You had [her last bf, his name wrong again]

Rio: [correct him again like yes lmao]

Buster: Did you love him?

Rio: It’s hard to say

Rio: Maybe a little, or in a way that’s platonic or something like that

Rio: not like my mama loved Johnny or your parents were in love though, not like that

Buster: Meaning no, you didn’t

Rio: I don’t want you to think I felt nothing for him and slept with him anyway

Rio: Is it that black and white? It just wasn’t intense as all that

Buster: I don’t think less of you, I’m not a hypocrite

Buster: because no shit it’s that black and white, love has to be intense otherwise what you’re describing is like

Rio: I should’ve loved him then, he’s a nice lad, nothing wrong with him

Buster: He isn’t me

Rio: No one is

Buster: There’s one person who makes sense, fits

Buster: nan and grandad for each other, my parents, your mum and Johnny, Uncle Tommy with Meena, you for me

Rio: Do you believe we can be like them?

Buster: I wouldn’t be doing any of this if I didn’t

Rio: You know 

Rio: how I feel, what I want

Buster: You want what I want and you feel the same as me

Rio: Exactly but I feel more

Buster: Oh, you’re allowing that as a competition, are you?

Rio: As I’ll win, absolutely

Buster: Good luck, babe, you absolutely won’t

Rio: You can give me your best PJs when I do

Buster: I’ll give them to you for a consolation prize as runner up

Rio: If you cared about me as much as you’re saying, you’d give me ANYTHING I wanted, PJs and the win

Buster: A win I give to you isn’t something you want

Rio: No, you’re right

Rio: Lucky for me I’m winning fair and square 

Buster: I don’t lose

Rio: It won’t feel like losing 

Buster: I’m glad you aren’t going to mind when you do

Rio: You wish, babe

Rio: I don’t have to go easy on you just because it’s your birthday, as it’s mine now too

Buster: I won’t go easy on you either but you don’t need to worry about being sore

Rio: Is that a promise?

Rio: You are sweet, McKenna

Buster: Hold me to it 

Rio: I’ll do my best

Rio: but, if things don’t go the way we want

Buster: They’ll go a way we want, even if it isn’t exactly the one you’re imagining right now

Rio: Okay, that’s the reassurance I needed

Buster: Plans may change but our feelings obviously aren’t going to

Rio: What if

Rio: it happens but it’s not what we thought, what then?

Buster: I already know it won’t be, my imagination is no match for you

Rio: Not you almost admitting a flaw

Buster: Well, it’s not like you can tell anybody

Rio: Damn it

Rio: I’ll have to content myself with you having told me

Buster: And with the reality of us, whatever happens

Rio: You’re already so in synch with me and what I want, more than I could’ve hoped

Buster: Hopes aren’t getting dashed, not on our birthday

Rio: Even if the rest of the party weren’t as bad, I’d still only want to spend it with you

Buster: Nothing and no one else matters

Rio: You make everything else quiet, all the chaos can’t compete

Buster: I refuse to let it touch you, it’s my turn

Rio: When, I’m so sick of waiting already

Buster: Once you land

Rio: Until I have to leave, yeah

Buster: Until the last literal second

Rio: I hate how far you are

Rio: though I’ll undoubtedly appreciate it when I’m there

Buster: And if your mum doesn’t appreciate my invite being extended for the whole of half term, I’ll come back with you, spend mine there

Rio: Do you mean that?

Buster: None of my promises are empty, babe

Buster: we have a house that is though

Rio: You wouldn’t miss home, and whatever your friends will be up to?

Buster: I’d miss you more

Rio: My mama would never ask me to come back, but one of the kids should let me know if I need to

Buster: You can ask me to, it’s okay, I understand needing to be closer than Chelsea is

Rio: It feels like anything could happen now, in the realest sense of the word

Rio: and at any time

Buster: I’ll still keep things quiet for you

Rio: When did you get so grown up?

Buster: Moving here meant I had to

Rio: Not like this though

Buster: I felt it too, and should anything else happen, being ready is the only option

Rio: I say it like I know what to do, how to keep them all safe

Rio: I thought I did but it still happened so it can’t be true

Buster: What’s true is that you won’t get fooled again, they will be safe from now on

Rio: Junior’s dad has him away

Buster: The actual grown ups don’t know what to do either, but at least everyone’s finally trying to after this fucked wake-up call that the ball can’t keep being dropped

Rio: I guess

Rio: it just seems rich when it was his brother but, it’s not actually fair to blame him, he’s not guilty and he’ll still have to grieve 

Buster: I agree, he’s totally wrong to split your family up at a time like this, but maybe he thinks your mum needs the break same as I believe you do

Rio: He wouldn’t be wrong

Rio: I think he needs family, that he’d be here if Johnny wasn’t

Buster: Yeah, I’m sure you’re right

Rio: Everything is just a mess, honestly

Buster: Except you, it’s impressive how together you are

Rio: Boy I wish

Buster: I know, and I’m rarely wrong, remember

Rio: How unmessy is it of me to proposition you, really

Rio: even if you’re down

Buster: Very, I’ll be able to stop cracks from appearing, your timing is smart

Rio: You can want it and not think it’s the best idea ever, I can’t tell and I won’t judge

Buster: I told you, I don’t have bad ideas

Rio: Too bad this was entirely my idea

Buster: I can help you, all you have to do is allow me to

Rio: I am, I trust you

Buster: Besides, this has never been entirely your idea

Rio: You wanna claim it so bad

Buster: Give me some credit

Rio: There’s plenty of credit to be had

Rio: I couldn’t feel like this over just anyone

Buster: I’ll take it from you when you’re here for the taking

Rio: I’m yours to take

Buster: Not yet, but you will be

Rio: I am too

Rio: and the countdown only keeps getting shorter

Buster: You’re mine, but I can’t have you until the countdown is over

Rio: I’ll do whatever you ask me to in the meantime

Buster: To make up for my flawed imagination, yeah?

Rio: Hey, you said it

Rio: But I’ll admit to being better than your fantasies yeah, I’m not scared

Buster: Share one of yours with me, you said you would

Rio: Okay, let me think

Rio: I have to pick a good one and there’s so many to choose from

Buster: You have to choose something which doesn’t need to wait until we’re together in the same room for me to turn into a reality for you

Rio: This is already that fantasy

Rio: talking to you like this, being allowed

Buster: Talking is the first step, even my imagination goes further

Buster: tell me what you want me to do

Rio: Tell me what to do

Rio: that’s what you’re good at

Buster: You’re allowed to talk, you want to, so talk

Buster: I haven’t heard your voice since [whenever he last would]

Rio: [leave him the adorably flustered kind of voice note you would when someone just asks you to say anything because you never know what to say but it’s obviously along the lines of telling him you miss him and can’t wait to see him and saying where you are, which is presumably your room too]

Buster: [obvs send her one back which has the daddy energy of telling her she’s a good girl and how proud he is of her etc etc and that he can’t wait to see her so he can show her properly and give her all the deserved rewards, we know the vibes]

Rio: [making excitable noises shamelessly about this all, telling him how you’re going to spoil him too, without being fully explicit, just hinting with the suggestive nature of this all rn]

Buster: [telling her that you are going to the guest room where she’s gonna sleep because of course you are, we can all pretend that you’re doing some more extra preparations/checking nobody has messed with the ones you’ve already done but you’re 1000% actually just lying on that bed instead of yours]

Rio: Please show me

Buster: Because you asked so nicely

Buster: [a lil vid of him lying on this bed, no spoilers for all his adorable little touches around this room, but letting her see that he has put on the pjs that he said she can borrow, at least until they do buy him some with his name on]

Rio: Everything is going to smell of you 🥰

Rio: I can’t stand how handsome you are

Buster: [him sending a pic that is just his body like there you go I’ve cut my head out that fixes it, but really he’s just showing off said body as he’s here making himself really comfy on this bed, taking up as much of it as he can]

Rio: That’s mine

Rio: Everyone will be looking but only I’m allowed to touch, right?

Buster: All yours, which is why you can touch me anywhere

Rio: My boyfriend

Rio: Can I touch myself right now, you’ve made me all wriggly

Buster: Say please again

Rio: Please, Buster, I can’t handle looking at you and not any longer

Buster: No, say it so I can hear you

Rio: [do, doing the most with this singular PLEASE]

Buster: You really need this too, don’t you?

Rio: [‘Yes, baby’ beyond 🥺]

Rio: I’m not going to make it to you in one piece if you don’t let me

Buster: Okay, as I do need every piece of you, and you know that

Rio: I’ll be whole again for you to break and put back together as many times as we want

Buster: Perfect every time, I’ll put you back together as flawless as you are now

Rio: Better for being touched by you

Buster: Kissed better wherever you need to be

Rio: All I’ve wanted since I was a little girl is to be loved by you

Buster: I have loved you since then

Rio: Claim me, I don’t want anyone else touching me again

Buster: They can’t, you belong to me

Rio: I’m sorry, that we didn’t wait for each other

Buster: We did, no one else touching us meant or felt like anything

Rio: Yours is the only face I’ve ever been able to cum to, I always think of you

Buster: I know, I keep my eyes closed and think of you too

Rio: I still love you, just like before

Buster: You’ll always love me

Rio: I don’t want to stop, I want more, want to love you in every way

Buster: Don’t stop, be mine forever

Rio: I exist for you, your love

Buster: I’m going to give it to you in every way that exists as an expression of love

Rio: I know it

Rio: How could I want anyone else when you’re right here, can give me everything I could ever dream of and more, it’s impossible

Buster: I am right here, where you’ll spend [however many] nights dreaming

Rio: Can you see me there, picture it

Buster: I can almost feel you

Rio: You will, your whole house will be filled with memories of it 

Buster: Every corner, you’ll have them memorised

Rio: I want to

Rio: I’ve barely spent any time there

Buster: I’ve spent hours before reliving where you have been

Rio: You’ve been there for, what, 5 years now

Rio: I need to know it better, like I know you, show me

Buster: And you’ve been here [however many] times

Buster: [and do tell her examples of literally everywhere she has been in your house in that absolutely obsessed way, like the first time you were here you sat in the green armchair by the window energy, being specific and then telling her that he followed in her footsteps every single time when she was gone like, and then I only sat in that green armchair exclusively until the next time you visited and sat somewhere else, we know what I mean]

Rio: This is real

Rio: Real as any of the adults, their ones, like you said, we’re the same

Buster: [obvs be more extra, like if we were using the green chair analogy again it would be how you’ve touched yourself in it, or like, another example could be taking a glass she’s used out of the dishwasher before it was put on and thus cleaned and using it himself because you gotta let her know how real this is to you to the point that you’ve gone insane and had to do things like that to cope with the fact you aren’t allowed to express it in other ways]

Rio: I’ve spoken to every person you’ve spoken to at parties, right after you, like we can have half a conversation if I catch the tail-end of yours and make it mine

Buster: I feel like I’ve let you down because I can’t bring myself to touch every lad you have

Rio: They don’t matter, all they do is let me down, you couldn’t

Buster: It would let me touch you, by proxy, that’s all anybody else is useful for

Rio: If I thought it would do anything but make you jealous, I’d have told you, or made them think it was their idea to go brag about it in vivid detail

Buster: The details aren’t vivid, that’s the problem

Rio: It’s like I have the volume up on you, full focus and zoom

Rio: I swear I could be with anyone else and still be entirely with you if you’re in the room, there’s no concentrating on anything else

Buster: I’m so loud for you that nobody in any of the surrounding rooms can concentrate

Rio: Let me hear you

Buster: [do obviously, just here doing the most with pure noise]

Rio: I want that right in my ear

Rio: The only reason not to let you deafen me is to hear it every day 

Buster: [do phone her to do it again right in her ear, we all know he can’t exactly replicate it though because it’s more extra for the fact he’s done that and it is right in her ear]

Rio: [not going to be able to not reply in kind with pure noise because duh, you’ve only voicenoted each other and now you’re fully on the phone and can respond in time]

Buster: [the way his response would seem fake and OTT or like he’s being even more loud and extra to be competitive as a child of baze but it’s actually just his true dramatic af reaction to being able to hear her react]

Rio: [just tell him how long you’ve wanted to hear this this close, with, again, an obsessive accuracy because the vibes here, even if telling him is going to take a minute in itself]

Buster: [we love these obsessed nerds, catch him moaning baby instead of babe for the first time in response to that because the only acceptable one for how happy he is to hear it]

Rio: [letting him know how much you approve by instantly dying way harder with this, couldn’t be more blatant about it]

Buster: [likewise because how could he not when she is, the girls are !!]

Rio: [just pointing out that your fams are potentially hearing one side of this, probably, soz to whoever is home and unfortunate enough not to be busy themselves, very much giving if only they knew who we were talking to]

Buster: [truly, neither fam needs this nonsense but hers especially does not rn and they are the ones more likely to be in as well, soz everyone, at least y’all are more likely to be busy unlike Nancy who’s more likely to be nosy about seeing if she can work out who he is talking to, but nevertheless, even more soz because we all know these 2 are into the fact that peeps can overhear them and that whole vibe]

Rio: [careful what you wish for Nance, you nosy nelly, oh the blackmailing you could do though lol, not right now though, we need no extra drama thank you, letting y’all have this]

Buster: [they need it for all the drama that’s currently occurring and all the drama yet to come, I agree, hence use your words sir and tell her how close you are to DYING, even though it’s v obvious, for the fact that you’re on her bed and wearing the pjs she is to borrow and you really want her to THINK about that and have it be that obvious + for how your voice will sound because you haven’t said much coherently it’s been mostly noise so that’ll hit too]

Rio: [turning this into a video-call because you know that will kill you both and also letting him know that you NEED to see him in this moment]

Buster: [you’re not wrong, it’ll kill him SO hard and she absolutely does need and will love to see it, god bless lads, again deserved even though nobody else deserves how ridiculously loud he is being in this guest room, shoutout to him making himself bleed again not as a deliberate throwback to earlier, though it is, but because he’ll have to do the absolute most not to moan her name when he sees her, getting blood on these pjs somewhere, I imagine you’ve bit your lip or something and have then put the top into your mouth to help you stfu or have put the arm part over your mouth, either/or]

Rio: [when you have to dramatically hang up in a way that would have you lowkey panicking if we said nothing but not going to be so cruel and leave you ages here, we’re shook to our core not actually dead]

Rio: You were going to say my name

Buster: I did, almost

Rio: I didn’t think I’d ever get to see that

Buster: How was the comparison to your imagination?

Rio: I’m not smart enough to have enough words 

Rio: maybe if I go to Uni, I can let you know

Buster: You’re smarter than girls I’ve met who are at uni as we speak

Rio: Why are Uni girls talking to you?

Buster: Because I’m smarter than them too, the point here to focus on, babe, is, you could go anywhere and do anything you want

Rio: Hm, I’m not sure that is the point now but okay

Buster: It is, I’m apparently too young for them to consider making the kind of point you’re alluding to

Rio: You absolutely are, birthday or otherwise

Rio: And you called me baby before, you’ve already demoted me, rude

Buster: You’re right, that was unforgivably rude of me, I should’ve called you my baby

Rio: I think I’ll forgive you all the same

Buster: Promise?

Rio: I promise

Buster: I understand if you’re mad at me for having another almost flaw before, barely stopping myself from saying your name like that

Rio: Do you think I’m mad?

Buster: You didn’t look it

Rio: I’m amazed you could see

Buster: You’ll be amazed what I can do by sheer force of will

Rio: I saw you bleeding, I know

Buster: You knew we needed to see each other

Rio: I’m smart

Rio: and I kept my clothes on, I don’t want to spoil what’s to come

Buster: You can keep these, to remind you of what just happened

Rio: I’m never going to forget

Buster: Good, don’t

Rio: I couldn’t, even if you wanted me to, none of it

Buster: I’d never want that

Rio: Promise?

Buster: You’re my baby

Buster: mine, forever

Rio: I had to hang up, but I wasn’t going to say your name

Buster: Shame, why did you?

Rio: You’ll think it’s stupid

Rio: and it is, at least, it isn’t logical

Buster: Tell me

Rio: I know it wouldn’t be enough for her to act on, like, obviously

Rio: but I don’t know, it’s too easy to imagine how she could get the wrong idea, from things she heard

Buster: That’s fairly logical

Rio: Oh, well, thanks

Buster: I should be thanking you

Rio: I’m assuming my sarcasm was noted but I have no idea what you’re talking about

Buster: Sarcasm is always noted, another reason to avoid going to law school in the states

Rio: What’s your point?

Buster: What are you waiting for me to say?

Rio: Forget it

Buster: No

Rio: You don’t get it, it’s not important that you do

Buster: Come on, Rio

Rio: I said we can move on, you come on

Buster: And I said no, I don’t want to move on, I want to get it, since you’re claiming I don’t

Rio: You do then, how’s that

Buster: Why are you being like this about it?

Rio: I just wanna move on, I regret bringing it up

Buster: Fine

Rio: It will be if you let it, don’t be moody

Buster: I’m not in a mood, I just think it’s ridiculous that you watched me cum but can’t talk to me, that’s all

Rio: You didn’t have to answer the call if you didn’t want

Buster: I did want to, clearly

Rio: So why make me feel bad for it like I overstepped 

Buster: When have I done that?

Rio: I wasn’t watching you from a window, like

Buster: Of course not

Rio: So, quit it

Buster: What, wanting us to be able to talk about anything? 

Rio: Obviously not

Rio: We don’t have to talk

Buster: Okay, bye then

Rio: Yeah, bye, arsehole

Buster: You’re the one who doesn’t want to

Rio: I didn’t say that but go ahead, as you’re raring to go, I’m not stopping you

Buster: You’ve been trying to shut me up for ages

Rio: If it feels this bad now maybe it’s a worse idea

Buster: It didn’t feel bad until you got this idea in your head to change the subject

Rio: Because I feel like I’m just distracting myself

Buster: What’s wrong with that?

Rio: It’s not fair to you and it’s taking me away from my real life where I’m needed

Buster: Bullshit, I promised to distract you to give you a break from your real life

Rio: I know but I’m saying maybe it’s not the great idea we thought it was

Buster: Because…?

Rio: Because all the reasons you said right at the start

Rio: I don’t know how to stop this

Buster: You don’t have to stop

Rio: Your bloody lip says otherwise

Rio: we will always have to stop

Buster: It isn’t always going to be like this, at the party we won’t need to hold back, and that’s only the most immediate example

Rio: It shouldn’t be so hard to hold back

Buster: You wouldn’t want it to be easy, love is meant to be intense, remember

Rio: It can be taken too far, we know that

Buster: But we’re not

Rio: Says you, how many people do you think would agree there

Buster: My parents would

Rio: Be serious, Buster

Rio: This is not in the plan for you

Buster: I am, they’d understand better than anyone

Rio: Understand doesn’t mean approve though

Buster: Approval doesn’t factor into the decision, I live my life to please myself, it’s mine, who the fuck else would I aim to?

Rio: It just so happens that your life has entirely aligned with your parents’ ideals so far then

Buster: They’re good role models, we share a lot of the same ideals, yeah

Rio: No one is ever going to be okay with this

Buster: I’m okay with it, more than

Buster: the only other person who has to be is you

Rio: When we’re alone

Rio: which, have we ever been, truly alone, I mean?

Buster: When we’re older we can alone as much as we want

Rio: When we’re done with school

Buster: I already look to the future with everything else, why would this be any different? 

Rio: I remember, Harvard

Buster: The present doesn’t have as much to offer, even when I’m giving you everything I can

Rio: I don’t need you to promise me anything

Buster: Maybe not, but I need you to accept that I am promising, that I mean all of them

Rio: I don’t think you’re playing me

Rio: why would you, this of all things

Buster: I told you, no games

Buster: I’m serious

Rio: I feel like I don’t know what to do with serious, that I’m getting it wrong

Buster: I’ll still be here when we’re my parents’ age, as serious, you’ve got time to get used to the idea

Rio: And leave you hanging that long? No, that’s not acceptable

Buster: I’ll accept that, or worse, if that’s what it takes, I’ve waited this long

Rio: You know how I feel about you, nothing can change that

Buster: I know having those feelings doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll act on them again, not if nothing can also change how guilty you do

Rio: It’s not your fault, the guilt

Buster: No, I didn’t ask to be your cousin, I’d have implicitly asked not to, had I been given a choice

Buster: but if I can’t ease it for you, that is my fault

Rio: It’s not even that, it’s all this shit, invading my head no matter what

Buster: Exactly, shit I swore I’d silence for you

Rio: How could you, it’s impossible to ask

Buster: There’s no such thing as an impossible task, other than bringing someone back from the dead, which you aren’t asking me to

Rio: It’s not worth my peace of mind

Rio: I just wish I could talk to him, just once

Buster: I know, but it wouldn’t give you any peace of mind, he wouldn’t say anything you want to hear or listen to what you were trying to

Rio: He’s not some bogeyman, I knew him, thought I did

Rio: this doesn’t make sense, what’s happened

Buster: He’s a man not a monster, that’s what makes this the horror story it is, people are capable of unspeakable shit, with few exceptions, everyone

Rio: He must’ve thought it was okay, what he did

Buster: Or he wanted to do it so badly he didn’t care that it wasn’t

Rio: Yeah

Buster: I don’t feel that separate from him, in that sense, here I am justifying this because I want to, again, it’s what people do

Rio: I feel bad for him

Rio: I haven’t said that to anyone else, and I won’t but it’s the truth

Buster: All your secrets are safe with me

Rio: Obviously I feel worse for Edie, I’m not that awful

Buster: No shit, but you’re allowed to feel both things, both sides exist

Rio: I want it to be black and white, just this once

Buster: Borrow my anger as well as my pjs, it makes everything seem black and white

Rio: I’m sorry, that it’s the grey cloud over everything

Buster: It isn’t your fault nor your apology, you aren’t to blame for any of it

Buster: and I’m going to figure out ways to give you back blue skies

Rio: I can’t have this tainted by anything

Rio: you’re so sweet and that deserves appreciation, no second guessing because of what people before have said and done

Buster: It won’t be

Rio: How do you hide it?

Buster: Determination, I can do anything I set my mind to

Rio: And no one can know how soft you are

Buster: Weaknesses are exploited, yet more human nature

Rio: You think we’re basically all bad?

Buster: Most people aren’t willing to work hard at being good, consistently it does take loads, and for what reward? Very little, usually

Rio: Maybe so

Buster: We tried, giving in feels better than abstaining for other people’s sake ever will

Rio: If that’s all you’ve got to say, like

Rio: That’s no review

Buster: You heard what I had to say, right in your ear

Rio: When I can feel the words being spoken on my skin, I’ll believe it

Buster: I’m not going to run out of skin or words, I’ll definitely make a believer of you

Rio: If we’re not fighting being bad people, we’d best start praying for forgiveness

Buster: I wouldn’t dare to fight any urge you have to get on your knees, even though saints and sinners are nothing but characters in a book

Rio: Don’t act like you’re thinking scholarly thoughts when your mind is so clearly in the gutter, boy

Buster: It isn’t, it’s on you

Rio: On my knees

Buster: I could easily write an essay about it

Rio: It’s the holidays, babe, I’m not getting you to prove that

Buster: Don’t you want to read it?

Rio: Don’t I want to distract you from writing it? Of course

Buster: It’s only fair after acting like me providing a distraction was such a bad thing

Rio: You need distracting or you’ll turn into such a boring cliche of a man and no one wants that

Buster: I need you, no one’ll want me around otherwise, that much is accurate

Rio: Okay, that sounded a little harsher than intended

Rio: but what’s the point of working so hard if you don’t fully enjoy it how you want

Buster: There is no point

Rio: I don’t get people like that, that’s never made sense to me

Buster: Don’t worry, I won’t ask you to make sense of it, we aren’t people like that

Rio: You can say I need you so I don’t turn out directionless and poor or something if you want

Rio: It’s a free shot

Buster: It’s a lie

Rio: And you could never be boring but I might save you from a cocaine heart attack at 41, like

Buster: Thanks, babe

Rio: I sense the genuine gratitude from here

Buster: Your version of the future is a genuine affront to daydreaming, try harder

Rio: I said it’s NOT going to happen, that’s good

Buster: You wrote might, at least commit to saving me hypothetically

Rio: It’s tempting fate to be definitive about when you’re going to die

Rio: I’m not taking chances

Buster: There’s no chance I’m dying young, I’ve got shit to do

Rio: You’re healthy

Rio: behave and there’s no reason but bad luck against you

Buster: You’re stuck with me

Rio: You’re going nowhere without me

Buster: You’ll have to commit then

Buster: close your eyes and think about it, you owe us both a good daydream

Rio: Don’t say I’m a spoilsport

Rio: when I’m already so committed to you

Buster: Do as you’re told and you know what I’ll say you are

Rio: [sending a picture like okay]

Rio: I had to open them to send it though, full disclosure

Buster: You can open them again when you’ve got something to tell me about what our future is going to be like

Rio: We won’t just go to [the holiday destination you mentioned earlier], we can go everywhere together, all the beautiful places

Buster: We have to, you belong there

Rio: And you

Rio: Paradise is the only suitable place for you

Buster: With you will be paradise

Rio: You have the nicest smile, I want to see it every day

Buster: [send her a pic of it rn ofc like okay]

Rio: Making you smile makes my heart feel like it could burst

Buster: I want to take you to every corner of the world and show you how much more beautiful you are than each of those places, starting with the one you’re named after

Rio: Can we go when you’ve finished your first lot of exams? Before 6th form

Buster: Perfect timing

Rio: This is real, really real

Rio: We can go 

Buster: [send her gorgeous hotels and sights and stuff to look at as if you can book this and go ASAP]

Buster: We’ll be there in [a countdown]

Rio: I’ve never been

Buster: Neither have I, our first time’ll be together

Buster: you’ll get every first that matters

Rio: Tell me about your first time

Buster: Are you sure you want to hear about it?

Rio: Why, is it a sad story?

Buster: Not to me, but listening to it might make you

Rio: If it’s not to you then I won’t be

Buster: I don’t know who first put it out there, but among our friends suddenly this mutual decision was reached that you had to lose your virginity before you turned 13 or it was unlucky and you were the utter bottom of the heap, so of course it became a game to see who could, and, naturally, how long before their birthday

Buster: I played along, picked a date ages before, [I’m trying to think when a good date would be, because I’m thinking a function and thus reason to have a party that isn’t like christmas or nye when he’d be in ireland not london?? I won’t commit us cos idk off the top of my head but say he’s told her said date here], and a girl

Rio: And…?

Buster: And we went into one of the many unnecessary and therefore unused en-suite bathrooms and she lay in the unfilled bath like a total party cliche

Rio: And that was that

Buster: Yeah

Rio: I suppose you won

Buster: I should lie and say I did, to make that part vaguely worthwhile, but annoyingly no, it was all for nothing

Rio: Well I can’t lie, that is desperately sad but I’m glad you don’t feel affected by it

Buster: Life here is defined by how empty and meaningless the majority of it is, socially anyway, I wasn’t expecting that particular rite of passage to be any different

Rio: It’s just horribly young, I’ve heard the same said about 16 but not 13

Buster: You can’t have been older, you barely are now

Rio: Yes I was, I was the age I am now

Rio: Still not ideal but I’m not going to deny it happened

Rio: Only a couple years before we had our first kiss, you weren’t old enough to be rushing through like that

Buster: Exactly, the age you are now is nowhere near 16 yet either

Rio: I’m about to turn 15, you were 12, it’s different

Buster: There’s a distinction as far as you’re concerned because he was your boyfriend

Rio: No it’s the age

Rio: I had boyfriends before then, I didn’t sleep with them though

Buster: You weren’t missing out, I’m sure

Rio: Oh Buster

Buster: Don’t, I’m not emotionally scarred, it’s fine

Rio: You don’t have to talk about it with me

Buster: We already have talked about it, there isn’t a lot to add, more graphic details aside

Rio: I’m not a predator, I don’t need that

Rio: I mean, you’re not going to take from me that that’s messed up

Buster: Am I especially proud of it, no, but do I need your pity, also no

Rio: I’m sorry I asked

Buster: I don’t know why you would, what you were expecting me to say

Rio: Not that, clearly

Buster: Forget it, I have

Rio: I wasn’t judging you, I was judging the situation, you know that right

Buster: A situation I participated in, so yeah, you are judging me actually

Rio: It wasn’t your idea, not even your friend’s

Rio: It’s just harmful and unrealistic expectations mixed with peer pressure

Buster: I wish I hadn’t told you now, Jesus

Rio: And I wish you’d had a more fulfilling and personal first time

Buster: Well, I wasn’t going to unless I waited for you

Rio: You still could have

Buster: If I couldn’t have you, what did it matter? I got it out of the way, that’s all

Rio: You get to keep your memories

Buster: Yeah, I do

Rio: You said you’ve forgotten it

Buster: Why are you trying to catch me out?

Rio: You’re being defensive

Buster: No wonder with the reaction I’m receiving 

Rio: I’m not attacking you

Buster: It was stupid, I know that

Rio: You were a kid, of course it was

Buster: I thought it would help me get over kissing you, that if I could feel something else, I wouldn’t still think about it

Rio: That’s understandable

Buster: It would’ve been, if it had worked

Rio: Well it was meant to, I was doing that too

Buster: I hate making mistakes

[punkscowardschampions]

Ruster pt.2

Rio: I mean, it’s not like the stakes are any lower for you, I know it’s not like that

Buster: I wish I were, that we both could be, it’s not an option though

Rio: No, it’s not

Rio: but right now, the way I see it, I’m going to end up doing worse closer to home if I don’t so this is actually the right thing for right now

Buster: The first time I’ve been called a good influence

Rio: I know right, savour that, like

Buster: You soured it slightly with the whole lesser of two evils approach, but yeah, I will

Rio: Come on, you’re so up on me right now with all the secrets I’ve spilled

Buster: It’s no secret that, again, I wish I were, on you right now

Buster: I’d be all over you, if I could

Rio: You can

Rio: [countdown]

Buster: Can I? 

Rio: It’s still her birthday, she’ll forget how much she wants to grill me in favour of getting attention and presents/totally wasted

Buster: Yeah, but what about when it isn’t?

Rio: We’re going shopping, she’s registered her lack of an invite

Buster: You know what I mean, bigger picture

Rio: Don’t you think we can hide it?

Rio: We have so far

Buster: My parents couldn’t

Rio: They lived together and had nan on their backs

Rio: it’s different, you aren’t meant to be my brother

Buster: It’s different because you really are related to me, by actual blood, we’d have the entire family on our backs

Rio: They’re never going to know

Rio: I mean, that’s what I thought but if you don’t think we can risk it then we won’t

Buster: It’s an impossible promise to make, that’s all

Buster: I didn’t say you weren’t worth the risk

Rio: Don’t worry

Rio: You’re not wrong

Buster: We established I rarely am

Rio: There you go, your streak remains intact

Buster: I know I won’t be able to stop once we start

Rio: I get it, I got it

Rio: we don’t have to say anything more about it

Buster: You don’t yet

Rio: What do you mean?

Buster: What I said, you don’t get it

Buster: you’re the one thing I don’t know how to stay rational about, that I’d break every single one of my rules for as if they’re nothing, completely irrelevant

Buster: I suddenly have to try so hard, and I never have to try

Rio: Maybe trying would be good for you

Buster: Getting caught wouldn’t be good for either of us

Rio: Then it’s done

Buster: No it isn’t, that’s my whole point

Rio: Then we go back to pretending, that’s all I can say to you

Buster: You’re already pretending if that’s all you can say to me

Rio: Because I’ve said enough, you want to talk incriminating, Jesus

Buster: Come on, we’re even

Rio: But we’re not because I have first-hand experience not to be so stupid, right there, the consequences

Buster: This is nowhere near the same as that, don’t

Rio: Well you’ve already said it’s worse than your parents so that’s where we land, is it?

Rio: Slap bang in the middle where you don’t want to be

Buster: Well, it is, technically

Buster: and I’m not going to say sorry for wanting a life where I’m not seen as a negative consequence nor stupid mistake

Rio: I’m not asking you to say sorry

Buster: You’re expecting us to keep this as simple as keeping it secret, but it’s complicated as fuck

Rio: I know how complicated it is, don’t patronise me

Buster: This is what me caring looks like, about you not losing everything, and more than what I want

Rio: I just feel stupid now, it’ll pass, it’s fine

Buster: You’re not, I am, I should’ve just let us both give into it

Rio: This is for the best, yeah

Rio: just feels fucking awful right now

Buster: The best for who? Fuck that

Rio: You’re being really confusing, just so you know

Buster: Which is what I’ve been trying to tell you, clearly unsuccessfully, I’m not used to being in two minds, torn apart by conflicting things I want

Rio: I don’t want to fuck your head any more than you want to mine, okay, that’s always been true too

Buster: This obviously isn’t going to pass, first of all, and second of all, I think it would kill me if it did for you because hearing you say that felt like a knockout blow landed

Rio: I didn’t mean that, you know I was being facetious to seem less pathetic 

Rio: it’s never gone away

Buster: I mean everything I’ve said, that includes you being worth the risk, and needing you

Buster: you don’t get to just cherry pick from when I began to talk myself out of it

Rio: I jumped straight to bitch mode, it’s a defence mechanism

Rio: I remember everything you said before

Buster: I don’t know what the right thing is to do, and that does fuck with my head

Rio: I know

Rio: it’s simultaneously the worst and best idea, I don’t know what we’re ever meant to do about that

Buster: Should I cancel your flight?

Buster: the hypothetical alone makes me want to throw up, if I’m being brutally honest

Rio: It’s still your birthday

Rio: but I understand if it feels impossible, I really do

Buster: No, it’d be impossible not to fly myself there instead, that’s what I’m saying

Buster: or again trying and failing to, at least

Rio: I just mean, being around you and not being with you

Rio: I suppose it’ll be like every other time but it feels different now

Buster: Be with me then, I’ll admit I was wrong if that’s what it takes, let you be right this once, this weekend

Rio: Well firstly I’m always right 

Rio: but secondly we only want you to be wrong so we can

Buster: I only want you, and it’s still my birthday, like you said

Rio: Don’t cancel my flight then

Buster: Don’t stay home, tempting as it’ll seem now

Rio: I’ll hide in the guestroom if it’s unbearably awkward or you start flirting with someone else

Buster: I’ll join in playing hide and seek if someone else awkwardly flirts with me, you heard me, I only want you

Rio: Everyone will be flirting with you, it’s your birthday

Rio: but I’ll help rescue you, promise

Buster: That’s the behaviour of everyone on any given weekday, babe

Rio: 🙄😏

Buster: You could humour me by pretending to be jealous

Rio: If it turned out to be real you wouldn’t be amused

Buster: I would

Rio: Well you’re not allowed to laugh at me, you 🤬

Buster: I’m not allowed to be turned on by it either but as a result I am all the more, on a par with an inappropriately timed laugh in church, yeah? The analogy, anyway

Rio: You are meant to be moved by the spirit, it’s arguably much more appropriate

Rio: but I would excuse it anyway just to be able to think about it more

Buster: If the spirit can handle the competition and inevitably losing to how moved I am by yours, it’s a date for Sunday

Rio: If you put that in your family calendar they’ll 100% know what’s up, like

Buster: You don’t want to be seen with me unless I’m in head-to-toe body paint is what’s up

Rio: Now you’re just playing dirty

Buster: I decided on my costume days ago, your dirty mind’s a completely added bonus

Rio: And you really wanted me to behave when that was your plan all along?

Rio: I see how it is

Buster: It’s nothing you haven’t seen stalking my latest holiday pics

Rio: I know I never double-tapped, I’m not an amateur 

Buster: You and me both

Rio: Promise or a threat?

Buster: I promise to be a threat to your costume surviving the night

Rio: I’m going to have to up my game, I’ll give you that

Buster: Give it to me when you have to leave

Rio: What’s left of it

Buster: No one opens their presents without tearing the wrapping paper to pieces

Rio: But the 🎀 makes it all the more inviting

Buster: It does show you care, all the attention to detail

Rio: Some boys don’t appreciate those things but I know you do

Buster: I appreciate everything you do for me

Buster: and wear

Rio: How am I not going to get covered in your body paint though

Rio: I can’t believe it took me that long daydreaming to stumble upon that problem

Buster: At the end of the night that won’t matter, you’ll shower or sleep it off, we’ll have to be well behaved in the beginning and middle, but that was your plan all along

Rio: Me and my plans…

Rio: I’m relying on everyone to be predictably lightweight so we can speed through the beginning and middle, just a tad

Buster: I’m relying on you to help me test how transferable it is, hence your early flight

Rio: Obviously you’d hate to stain your parents furniture, only too happy to keep you out of trouble, you know that

Buster: I’d hate to get on their bad sides because I didn’t do thorough checks of how easily that shit rubs off on contact

Rio: We’ll make sure we cover all possibilities

Buster: You’re doing me such a big favour, I’ll owe you as big

Rio: You can help me get ready if you want

Buster: Of course, I wouldn’t expect you to get yourself ready

Rio: As I’m foregoing the +1, it does fall down to you 

Buster: You need me

Rio: And want you

Buster: My full attention, I remember

Buster: that’ll get you ready

Rio: 🧼🛁🧴🪞💅💄 treatment, please

Buster: No less than devotion to the task

Rio: You always were the most fun

Buster: I have to complete things to my satisfaction, always

Rio: What does that look like with me?

Buster: What does it look like in your daydreams?

Rio: That’s a surprise

Buster: How do I look?

Rio: like I can’t believe you exist, let alone exist in my real life and not on the big screen or in some old romance novel

Buster: You wouldn’t believe the hours I spend staring at you on my phone screen

Rio: When, tell me, I want to believe it

Rio: Before bed? In boring lessons? I need details 

Buster: Yeah, but go ahead and add to your correct guesses during half-time of a game, after school when I’m meant to be doing homework or any other spare minute I have

Rio: You need motivation

Rio: I like the idea of being that for you

Buster: I’m not lacking motivation, stimulation though

Rio: You’re bored

Buster: I know it’s outrageous of me given everything you’re going through, I bet you’d love to be bored

Rio: I won’t start shouting at you again, it’s alright

Rio: Can’t truly say it’s your fault, I’d be bored if I were you too, I think

Buster: Don’t let it put you off the swap, it’ll still be good for you

Rio: Like you said, times like this, could use a little more boredom and a lot less chaos

Rio: selfish as that would be if I were going to voice it to anyone but you

Buster: Selfishness is necessary, especially at times like this, as I’ve also said

Rio: That doesn’t stop it feeling like I’m making this about me right now when it isn’t at all

Buster: But it is, it’s about all of you

Rio: But her the most

Buster: You have to find your own way to live with it, because no shit that isn’t going to be the same as hers

Rio: I know it’s best she is in there, and yeah a lot better than ending up in prison but I still wish she wasn’t, that she could be at home

Buster: She can come home, that’s what’s important to keep in mind

Rio: I know

Rio: and I’ll be there and a better sister when she does

Buster: You’ve always been the best sister, what happened wasn’t your fault

Rio: If we’d been on the ball, it couldn’t have, or, we’d have noticed at least, not let it carry on for a whole fucking year

Buster: If he had a neon sign above his head announcing what he was, more people would be going to prison than just Liam

Rio: Poor kid

Buster: You can’t know things you aren’t told and she had her reasons to keep her mouth shut, stop blaming yourself

Rio: She shouldn’t need to say, that she wasn’t okay

Rio: You’d feel guilty if you were in my place, you can’t say otherwise

Buster: She wasn’t okay because his sister died, that’s why this went under everyone’s radar

Rio: His mum’s life is over

Rio: If she could sue our family she would, like

Buster: I’m not qualified to offer my services there yet either, don’t worry

Rio: Cutthroat 

Buster: He’s not dead and we don’t live in America, once he’s sentenced, you’ll see, he’ll be out at some point in the not too distant future, he and his mum can both rebuild their lives

Rio: Neither of us knows what a decade or so alone or in a cell feels like, I’m not going to be that confident about it, I can’t

Buster: I’m confident he’ll consider his punishment worth it, whatever the consequences end up being

Buster: in his place, I would

Rio: That’s such a male response

Rio: He’s not old enough to face those sort of consequences 

Buster: You’d kill him too, I don’t believe you wouldn’t

Rio: I want him to have to live with the realisation that he hurt her, that he was wrong

Buster: People who do what he did don’t think they are wrong, it isn’t a realisation you could force him to have

Rio: I’d make him

Buster: How?

Rio: I don’t know

Rio: and it’s a pointless hypothetical now, he’s gone

Buster: He didn’t deserve to live, even with that

Rio: I can’t talk about it anymore

Buster: Okay, we’ll stop

Rio: It makes me feel ill, I can’t think about what happened

Buster: Don’t, think about something equally pointless, like towel swans again

Rio: You’ll have to show me how to make them, after I’ve had to ruin your hard work

Buster: At least I get to think about you in the shower, which feels very productive

Rio: I’m sure I’m going to be thinking about you the entire time I’m in my guestroom and you’re not with me

Buster: I’m going to be with you the entire time

Rio: Isn’t your room a floor down?

Buster: So?

Rio: Your parents aren’t going to make sure you’re tucked up in your own bed?

Buster: You know my parents well enough to answer that question yourself

Rio: I suppose so, yeah

Buster: Not to mention, you’ve met me

Buster: I do what I want, not what I’m told

Rio: They might not believe how much you want to hang out with me but

Buster: But you can let me worry about it, our birthday weekend is about giving you a break from yours

Rio: I’ll try, I promise

Buster: You won’t have any new ones, I promise

Rio: I’m not, we’re not going to get in trouble, I believe that

Buster: You’re in the safest hands imaginable 

Rio: Soon

Buster: [a countdown]

Rio: And I promise if it doesn’t happen, I won’t be mad and leave

Rio: you’ve tried so hard for me already

Buster: I’ll make it happen, however hard I have to try

Rio: I don’t love it sounding like a challenge, no thanks

Buster: The rest of the guest list might present a challenge to avoid, but I’ll succeed in not letting them ruin our plans, that’s all

Rio: I know how to play nice, just don’t lose sight of me

Buster: I could never

Rio: If I work out my costume, it’ll be impossible for you to look away

Buster: You’re impossible to look away from no matter what

Rio: But you’re going to be excited, that’s all

Buster: I already am

Rio: More

Rio: like you can’t bear not touching me

Buster: My costume won’t be able to handle me being much more excited

Rio: 😳🥴

Rio: I’ll sit in your lap, save your blushes

Buster: A nice gesture, but yours will still be in full view

Rio: I would be taking one for the team, yeah, you’d owe me big

Buster: It’s important I find out how much you can take, call it another necessary evil if you like

Rio: I like you

Rio: try me

Buster: You’ll like my lap

Rio: I’m small, you’ll not even know I’m there, like

Buster: I will

Rio: Let me stay

Buster: I’m not letting you go

Rio: I need you that close

Buster: Closer

Rio: Now

Rio: I’m going crazy waiting for you

Buster: I seriously can’t bear not touching you

Rio: We’re going to play until I have to go, you can put your hands wherever you want, no rules and no timeouts

Buster: No games

Rio: Oh he’s seriously serious

Buster: You’re mine to do what I want with for as long as we have, it doesn’t get more serious

Rio: You own me, inside and out

Buster: Not yet

Buster: but I’m going to

Rio: Are you scared?

Buster: Why would I be?

Rio: You won’t be able to get rid of me

Buster: I can’t anyway, we’re family

Rio: You’re about to be my one and only if you’re not careful

Buster: Good, because I don’t know how careful I can be

Rio: I don’t want to be right now, never with you

Buster: I’ll give you everything you do want, always

Rio: I can take it all, no test run necessary

Buster: I’ll get you ready, just like I said

Rio: Ready to be your girl

Buster: For anything

Rio: What does it say about me that I’d let you do anything to me, no hesitation

Buster: It says I’m right to think of you as my favourite

Rio: If your sister wasn’t there, I swear

Buster: She’ll be out of it by [a shady o clock]

Rio: Out of it enough to give everyone else a show? I don’t know

Buster: By [a slightly later o clock]

Rio: Okay

Rio: I want it so I’ll believe it

Buster: Seeing’s believing and you won’t be able to doubt the state she’ll get herself into

Rio: Might kill your mood, sound of

Rio: there’s other places and times for it, it’s not now or never

Buster: Now or never is for other people, not us

Rio: You’ll have me forever, even if you get a fancy wife and kids

Buster: I wouldn’t give up on you or give you up

Rio: We’ll always be each other’s favourites, everyone will just have to understand that’s how it’s been since we were little

Buster: They’ll understand they can’t compete, whoever they are

Rio: No one comes close, you’re on your own level

Buster: You’re on some kind of divine level, you’re flawless

Rio: The ground will give out before my knees, I mean it

Rio: There’s no man alive who could stop me needing you

Buster: There’d be no space for any other man to get between us

Rio: I promise I’d put it in my vows, you come first

Buster: I’ll put a ring on every finger, there’ll be no room for that either

Rio: Buster

Buster: Starting on our shopping trip, I’ll take you to [some boujee shop she’d want jewellery from], I mean it

Rio: I know you do, you’re not that good at faking things, not with me

Buster: I don’t want to with you

Rio: That’s why you couldn’t commit to being a prick

Buster: I’ll only commit to you, never against you

Rio: We’re better as a team

Rio: You know I’m invaluable when I’m not falling apart

Buster: I want every piece of you, even the ones you need me to stick back together first

Rio: Don’t make me cry

Rio: or regret how late I left going for this finally

Buster: I regret nothing about this

Rio: Swear on your life?

Buster: [make yourself bleed again like you did before, just to be the most extra possible about it]

Rio: Okay but I can’t keep making you do that

Rio: no matter how much I appreciate it/you

Buster: You could make me do anything

Rio: It’s a responsibility I take very seriously

Buster: Because you’re a very good girl

Rio: And you’re too important to hurt

Buster: It doesn’t hurt

Rio: Good

Rio: I’d do it too but the last thing we need is that concern raised

Buster: Spit again

Rio: [go for it bestie, clearly being more blatant with the energy this time because we all know what’s up]

Buster: Fucking perfect

Rio: It couldn’t be more mutual

Buster: [unnecessarily do your own spitting just to be like yeah it can but we know why really]

Rio: How are you so

Buster: You know how and you know why

Rio: Don’t change so I can’t recognise you, ever

Buster: Tell me a different way and I’ll swear that to you too

Rio: I don’t want you to think I’m greedy

Buster: I want the opportunity to prove myself, tell me

Rio: You have, tenfold

Rio: I can’t have this end because it’s too much too soon

Buster: It ends on our terms and I wouldn’t make any that limit us like that

Rio: Alright, post something, leave me a hidden message in plain sight

Buster: [do obviously, the possibilities are endless with all the things you chatty kaths have said and done]

Rio: [obviously interacting with this in whatever stealth not stealth way you can]

Buster: The world didn’t end

Rio: Not yet

Buster: It isn’t going to, it’s ours

Rio: If we do everything else right and keep everyone else happy

Rio: then we get to do this, be each other’s reward

Buster: Yeah

Rio: No one will have anything bad to say about us, there’ll be nothing bad to think, imagine, we can have this

Buster: I’m imagining you dressed as an angel

Rio: Is that what you want

Buster: It breaks the rules of a costume, it’s barely a fantasy, it’s who you are

Rio: I wish devil was less cliche for you

Buster: We’ve established your fondness for them, I can go and buy red body paint instead

Rio: You can’t, you’ll look perfect 

Rio: no notes

Buster: Well, I need really detailed notes from you actually

Rio: As long as you aren’t expecting me to do it with a quill or whatever

Buster: No, I can think of loads of better uses for a feather, babe

Rio: Sadly running out of time before we run out of ideas is what I knew would happen

Buster: Do you have to go now?

Rio: Not right now, no

Buster: Then sad isn’t the word

Rio: And you’ll savour me all the more for missing me when you have to

Buster: I’ll savour you because you’ve earned it, not because I’m lacking anything

Rio: I’m just saying, keep on the schedule we are currently and you’ll be about dying by the next holiday/birthday

Buster: On our current schedule I have been since [the truth or dare kiss]

Buster: your birthday isn’t that long and you’re all I want, I’ll wait as long as it takes

Rio: 🥺 

Rio: You’ll have to stop reminding me how cute you were if you want me to call you cute now

Buster: I told you, I’ve gotten cuter

Buster: Do you need more reminders of that?

Rio: I mean, more supporting evidence couldn’t hurt

Buster: [sending her a picture of you rn, in your bed I imagine because where else given how much y’all have been flirting]

Rio: Never wanted to be anywhere so badly

Rio: not even [list your ideal hol destination idk]

Buster: [another pic where he’s made the tiniest space for her because she’s so so smol]

Buster: Be here until we’re old enough to go to [the destination] alone together

Rio: [sending it back with a doodle of yourself there like a nerd because you’re in your feelings rn]

Rio: I wish

Buster: Close your eyes and wish properly, I need you

Rio: [send him a pic of you doing that so seriously]

Rio: My Birthday is so far away

Buster: I’ll send a gift for every day I don’t get to spend with you, to make it go quicker

Buster: constant hidden messages in plain sight

Rio: Only if you send something piece by piece, you can’t 

Rio: How do I begin to thank you?

Buster: Begin with an invite, even if you aren’t in the party mood

Rio: Even if I’m not doing anything?

Buster: Seeing you is what I care about doing

Rio: I was starting to think you didn’t like coming here, you know

Buster: You know I prefer to be there

Rio: You aren’t the worst actor in the world, just not quite as good as you’d need to be, that’s all

Rio: It’ll be nice to have you here

Buster: I’ll get you a real hotel room if you want

Rio: For once, it’s pretty valid of you not to want to stay over mine

Rio: but your family won’t be at your Dublin place, we’ll have it to ourselves

Buster: I suppose I can turn ours into a spa, yeah

Rio: All I want is to be with you too

Buster: I’ll be able to look after you anywhere

Rio: I can’t face a party, it’s too soon

Rio: but that doesn’t mean there’s not plenty of fun things we can do

Buster: You know how much I appreciate you coming to my party, don’t you? Genuinely, whatever we do

Rio: Yeah

Rio: and I don’t think it’s like, disrespectful, of you to be having one, but here and me, that’d be different

Rio: The only people who would come would be people wanting to gawk and I don’t want to hurt the people who couldn’t face it for the right reasons

Buster: It’s okay, I’ll tell Nance to shut the fuck up if she can’t figure out why it’s different and starts trying to demand you celebrate her way, I understand

Rio: I shouldn’t be surprised, if it’s a case of me vs her, you’ve always taken my side, no arguments

Buster: You vs anyone, I’m on your side

Rio: You know I’m on yours

Buster: I’ve heard you defend me when other people in this family are on my case, yeah

Rio: Other people in this family can expect too much

Rio: or be too quick to say the harshest thing

Buster: They all see what they want to see, why not use that collective blindspot to our advantage, some good should come out of it for once

Rio: Agreed

Rio: There’s no harm in this if we do it right, be smart

Buster: Which we are

Buster: I freaked out before but it’s out of my system

Rio: Of course you did, the closest we’ve ever come to acknowledging this before was only because some kid dared you to

Buster: It was too hard to acknowledge and, on the other hand, impossible to deny

Rio: Now I feel like I can’t shut up about you

Rio: at least I can bring it all to you, that should keep me from bothering anyone else with this

Buster: And I’ll bring what I can’t to you to the pitch or the ring

Rio: And I can watch

Rio: or you’ll tell me in vivid detail about all your wins, right

Buster: Exactly, I’ll think up a new goal celebration only you will know is for you

Rio: You’re too precious

Rio: what’s your goal celebration now?

Buster: [send her a video of you doing whatever it was at a game that one of your friends/a girl filmed, because I don’t know but I know damn well it would be such a show offy thing haha whereas he’ll do something so cute and feelsy for her now, whether that’s a swan ref or rings on her fingers ref or whatever it may end up being]

Rio: You’re such a nerd, I love it

Buster: [send her back the doodle she did of herself with ‘you’re a nerd and I love it’ written across it]

Rio: Okay, well, that was in private, first of all

Rio: secondly, cheek of it, do you want me there or not, boy

Buster: Well, okay, what would your goal celebration be?

Rio: I’m not the football type, honey

Buster: Come on, show me

Rio: [doing something that’s way more cheerleader with makeshift pompoms because that is who you are and you can’t fathom being a sporty gal like that lol]

Buster: [obvs give her all the deets so she can cheerlead for you in future like what number you are, position you play, team colours and mascot etc, anything else that she might need to know that she couldn’t from an insta stalk, because we can’t even pretend to take the piss out of whatever she did because it would’ve been hot and a vibe]

Rio: You know I’m not afraid to be loud about it

Rio: 📣🥇

Buster: [give her the same deets for boxing which I know less about but I know there’s still colours and there’s a song lol, the important thing is that feels more intimate because she’d be cheering for him exclusively, there isn’t a whole ass team there it’s just his win and we’re letting her know we want her to be that loud and extra just for us obvs]

Rio: Do you get hurt really badly?

Buster: Of course I don’t, I hardly get hit

Rio: Okay, I’ll be able to cope

Buster: And I’ll win even sooner and cleaner if you’re there cheering me on

Rio: I like watching you win

Rio: at anything you do

Buster: I’ll have to sit you in court every day as well

Rio: They’ll think I’m a stalker

Buster: They’ll all know who you are to me

Rio: You’ll be such a good lawyer, I’ll have to come to court to see you, how busy you’ll be

Buster: I’ll make time for you nonetheless, just like I’m going to make sure everybody who’s allowed to know you’re mine, does

Rio: There’s a world of strangers that can know all about us

Buster: We could move somewhere full of strangers

Rio: Where would you live if you could pick anywhere?

Buster: America’s the cliche, for Harvard 

Rio: Of course, I knew that about you 

Buster: Would you come with me?

Rio: Would I fit in with your life there, what you’re picturing

Rio: I don’t know

Buster: My life would end up with too big of a hole in it otherwise, without you there

Rio: You’d end up playing the other kind of football, finding a real cheerleader Elle Woods type, going to hers for Thanksgiving

Buster: And I’d hate all that

Rio: How do you know?

Buster: Because I hate the hypothetical of us only seeing each other for holidays when we’re old enough to spend as much time as we want together

Buster: secondly, American football is just rugby for pussies who need to strap pillows to themselves to play it, not to mention, they can’t handle their drink, and thirdly, it’s a fucking grating accent

Rio: Don’t talk yourself out of it on my account, babe

Rio: I mean you aren’t wrong but I never want to hold you back

Buster: I want you to be able to hold me, without a ridiculously long flight first

Rio: You know I’d go with you, anywhere

Rio: It’s just not somewhere I’ve ever thought about being, it’s not as if I was going to apply to Harvard

Buster: You could apply to [other schools nearby that aren’t law idk but the point is he thinks she seriously is smart enough and that’s important] though

Rio: I don’t know if I want to go to Uni

Rio: I’m 50/50, sometimes I do but then other times I just want to start as soon as I can

Buster: You have years to decide yet, I’m hugely ahead of the curve, that’s all

Rio: What a shocker 

Buster: I’ve always known what I want, what can I say?

Rio: I want a lot of things

Buster: So do I

Rio: Some of the things I want contradict others, I’ll have to make a choice

Buster: As I said, no timer to your head, not being held by me anyway

Rio: I just mean, what you want, it’s simple and you can see exactly how to get there step by step

Buster: You said my life’s simple earlier, now my goals are

Rio: I’m not trying to be bitchy

Buster: I’ll have to make choices and sacrifices too, everyone does

Rio: Of course but you don’t seem to have as much trouble with that as I do

Buster: I’m not conflicted about doing what’s necessary to end up living the life I want, no

Buster: you get one, that’d be pointless

Rio: Yeah, one

Rio: If I make the wrong decision, I could ruin everything

Buster: If you make the wrong decision, you do whatever it takes to make things right

Rio: Obviously

Buster: It’s difficult to honestly ruin everything, irredeemably 

Rio: It doesn’t seem it

Rio: Entirely too easy now

Buster: We, this, wouldn’t

Buster: we haven’t killed anyone

Rio: It would, come on

Buster: You know what I mean, you could make it okay

Rio: How, say it was a total accident, like I didn’t know any better?

Buster: Say we both consented and it’s not illegal 

Rio: That’s what everyone’ll care about, sure

Buster: They should give a shit about us being happy, that’s the line families recite to each other as what’s meant to matter above all else

Rio: Not if ours fucks with everyone else’s though

Buster: If everyone else stuck to that ours would’ve never been fucked with and we wouldn’t ever be talked about, none of them have

Rio: It’s my turn for a freakout, that’s all

Buster: Yeah, you’re owed yours

Rio: Don’t be mad

Buster: I’m not at you, every point is valid

Rio: And I’m only rehashing yours, we both know the truth

Buster: And I shouldn’t have brought up the future, unless immediate, like our birthdays

Rio: It feels ruined and wrong now

Buster: Don’t

Rio: I’m sorry

Buster: If that’s how you feel, it’s my apology to hand out not yours

Rio: No, it’s really not

Rio: it’s all me

Buster: I’ve really failed at cheering you up

Rio: Don’t be stupid, that’s all you’ve done and you want to do more

Buster: Maybe I’m stupid to think I can

Rio: Fucking hell, I’m not that tragic, like

Buster: Bigger picture, my, people would have to adapt to the idea of us or get left behind, mindset isn’t going to make you feel any better 

Rio: It’s just the reality of the situation, not your idea

Buster: But it isn’t a reality you want

Rio: I haven’t said that

Buster: You don’t have to

Rio: You’re deciding that for me, are you

Buster: It’s been decided by the kind of person you are and what you prioritise

Rio: I can care about you too, I already do

Buster: I conflict with the other things you care about

Rio: Not in any way except the one that is always going to be there, which is the same for me and your life

Buster: In this vs, you aren’t going to take my side

Rio: You wouldn’t take mine

Buster: Of course I would

Rio: Not if I stood in the way of the things you really want, and I wouldn’t expect you to

Buster: I’d find a way to have it all, that’s what I’m expected to do

Rio: That doesn’t include having me

Buster: It does

Rio: You aren’t something I’m conflicted about

Buster: Bullshit

Rio: You aren’t, I know exactly how I feel

Buster: I know exactly how you feel

Rio: You want to tell me what to do but I’m allowed to be scared

Buster: I don’t want your fear calling the shots

Rio: You’re the one calling things off

Buster: Where?

Rio: Aren’t you?

Buster: Why would I do that? I’m not scared

Rio: You’re going to let me come to the party still then or

Buster: You’re still invited

Rio: And you’ve not cancelled my flight

Buster: Obviously not

Rio: Good

Buster: Is it? You clearly don’t feel good about it if you have to ask whether I’ve changed my mind

Rio: You said I was owed my moment, I’ve had it

Buster: Okay

Rio: I still want to see you, for that to be what you want too

Rio: nothing else is important right now

Buster: Seeing you is all I want, that hasn’t changed either

Rio: Then believe me, I want this, you

Buster: I don’t doubt you want me

Rio: You do think that’s all it is though

Buster: I think, in comparison, there are other things you want more

Rio: It takes more to fill a life, you want lots of things too

Buster: Not right now

Rio: I wouldn’t be going anywhere if you weren’t what I wanted most

Rio: how soon it is, but I need to

Buster: I’ll be here for as long as you need me

Rio: Do you think I’m using you

Buster: You wouldn’t be going anywhere if that’s what was happening

Rio: I’d not be able to stand it if you thought that

Buster: This is deeper than that, neither of us would have freaked out if it wasn’t

Rio: Exactly

Rio: If I just thought you were fit, I’d be able to get over that without potentially upending life as we know it

Buster: And I’d be able to get used by girls who don’t need a plane to, there’s plenty in my own postcode

Rio: Duh

Buster: So decide on a costume and pack

Rio: Deciding how many outfits I need

Buster: You don’t, we’re going shopping the day after

Rio: Now I’m trying to decide if that’s the best or second best reason not to need clothes

Buster: Buying you as many outfits as you need is definitely second best

Rio: Yeah it is, I can only fake the second is anywhere near close

Rio: and that says a lot because you know how I feel about shopping

Buster: You haven’t shopped with me before, it could be closer than you think

Rio: I can’t wait for you to dress me

Buster: You’ll like putting them on almost as much, I promise

Rio: We have to treat you too though, whatever you want

Buster: My treat is dressing you in whatever I want

Rio: You like having someone else to spoil too

Buster: You’ll spoil me with how you model everything

Rio: Of course, you need to know what you’re getting

Buster: You’re right, it is a very strong need

Rio: Have you done this before?

Buster: Bought a girl a dress?

Rio: Yeah

Buster: You’re joking, yeah? None of them have the taste to appreciate mine

Rio: I’d be pissed off if you had, very jealous

Buster: It’s my first time, unfortunately

Buster: I’ll have to make you jealous with something else

Rio: It won’t be your first time, that’s enough

Buster: What about you?

Rio: My last boyfriend

Buster: Tell me what he dressed you in

Rio: Nothing like you will, not real clothes

Buster: But how jealous am I of him?

Rio: You hate him, naturally

Buster: True

Rio: But you’re the only one I’m interested in sharing my fantasies with, they were all his

Buster: I’m the only one you can share them with, I’m in all of them

Rio: You are the fantasy, but it’s real, anyone else would be pretending to be who you are

Buster: That’s why everybody else bores me

Rio: You need me, I’m made for your needs

Buster: I can already tell we have the same needs

Rio: All day every day

Rio: it’s amazing I can get anything else done

Buster: You’ll be amazed what you can get done when I reward you

Rio: You make me want to be the best I can be

Buster: That’s no fantasy, you are, the best there is

Rio: I can forget, some people don’t remind you, it’s the opposite

Rio: you tell me all the time

Buster: I’ll tell your last boyfriend, as a birthday present, point him out to me

Rio: Ugh, I’m embarrassed by them all now, your fault

Buster: None of it’s yours?

Rio: Now I have bad taste, do I?

Buster: You could’ve had me

Rio: You were keeping yourself pretty busy too

Buster: Too busy for girlfriends, I haven’t had one

Rio: You’ve had girls the same way though, just not calling it that

Buster: It would be in extremely poor taste, and mine isn’t in question

Rio: Ha ha

Rio: point is I know for a fact your body count is higher, boy

Buster: Point is, I’ve remembered [her last bf’s name wrong but almost right in that is it bants or do I genuinely think that’s their name way] and your taste is no longer in question it’s noticeably absent

Buster: only hanging by a thread at all, in fact, because I know you were thinking of me every time you were with him

Rio: [correct him]

Rio: You knew that and I know that your thoughts weren’t with whoever was in your bed, no matter their taste, you wanted mine

Buster: Are you sure? I could’ve sworn his name was [your wrong guess]

Rio: 😏 You wish I cared that little

Buster: I assume you’re calling each of them by mine anyway, it wasn’t as though he was ever going to meet me

Rio: Definitely wanted that rumour spread about… 🐶😻

Rio: What sort of man is putting up with that, like

Buster: I can only apologise for my parents having taste as well, instead of deciding to christen me [insert some generic boy names of your era here]

Rio: I never said I disliked your name

Buster: Because you don’t

Rio: It suits you

Rio: and I’ve seen what other posh people name their children, you came off well

Buster: Yours suits you too, however frustrating it may be to me personally that you aren’t named something more generic like your youngest sisters

Rio: You can take that up with my da

Buster: I’d take plenty of other things up with him first, in that hypothetical

Rio: Good thing you have no reason to talk to him

Buster: Good for him, yeah

Rio: Don’t you start

Buster: I’m lacking an opportunity

Rio: He’s my dad, I wouldn’t talk about your parents like that

Buster: You’ve got no grounds to, if there were, you could

Rio: It’s not my business, is why

Buster: Why isn’t it? We’re family too

Rio: Because I’m not going to act like I know better, or have spent enough time with them to comment

Rio: so take the hint

Buster: You do know better, take your own advice

Rio: What does that mean?

Buster: He’s your dad, you should be aware of exactly what I’m saying

Rio: You don’t know him, Buster

Buster: I know what I need to, and it’s more than enough to form an opinion

Rio: Look, I love my mammy but it wasn’t exactly fair what she did

Rio: She was already not in love with him, then she left him for someone else and went back when he turned out to not be the one either

Rio: How do you think you’d feel?

Buster: It isn’t about how he was treated, his sob story, fabricated or factual, makes no odds, it’s about how he treats you, how you feel

Rio: Of course it is, that all matters

Buster: No it doesn’t, woe’s him, he’s an adult and a father, whatever happened between him and your mum is nothing to do with you, and, is also ancient history

Rio: He wasn’t an adult, neither of them were, it kind of changes everything, clearly

Rio: and I think all things considered, I’m lucky, by everyone’s measure

Buster: He is now and lucky by comparison isn’t good enough

Rio: And I don’t have a problem with him now, it isn’t your place to so let’s drop this

Buster: It isn’t my fight, which is why I told you I wasn’t going to start one

Rio: Stop then

Buster: Consider why you have a problem with constructive criticism of him if he’s so fucking great

Rio: Because you’re just a kid and it’s none of your fucking business what my relationship with my father is or isn’t

Rio: It isn’t constructive, it’s just rude

Buster: You’re rude, you think you can set really specific parameters of what I can and can’t care about and call me out for them

Rio: You don’t know when to stop

Rio: or worse you do and you just keep going anyway

Buster: I’m entitled to my opinion

Rio: Sounds about right

Buster: It’s closer to being than yours, at least

Rio: Piss off with this, it’s boring

Buster: Fine, I’ll go away

Buster: back to the fictional box you imagine I live in with no info beyond that of my own simple life, perhaps

Rio: All I said was you’ve heard the family’s side of it, of course they’re going to take my mum’s, there’s no point anyone rooting for him

Buster: I heard what you said, babe

Rio: Forget it, you only care long enough to be able to make your point

Buster: I’ll forget it because yours is it’s none of my business, why should I care, yeah?

Rio: This entire conversation could have been avoided but whatever

Buster: You’d love that, but it isn’t how conversations work

Rio: Not with you, anyone else would have stopped by now

Buster: Everyone else backing down too often is another conversation, akin to the issue I brought up before of them seeing solely what they want to see

Rio: But what are you trying to achieve with this one? 

Buster: It’s on the record, whether or not you eventually realise without me needing to spell out what I was trying to do

Rio: Wow, you patronising twat

Buster: You started it

Rio: No, you

Rio: but I’m so glad you got to speak your opinions at me for your own peace of mind

Buster: I’m just a kid, what else would I do but kick off, right?

Rio: Comprehend that my relationship with my dad won’t be changed by anything you do or don’t say? 

Rio: Obviously not

Buster: I already had comprehended how baseless you believe anything I say on the subject to be

Rio: Because he’s my dad, nothing changes that, it’s personal

Buster: Because you want to keep me at arm’s length as far as the rest of your personal life is concerned

Rio: No, that’s not it at all

Buster: Yeah it is

Rio: You do think I’m using you, you said you didn’t but you clearly do

Buster: You think I only care about talking over you

Rio: Because right now, with this, you are

Rio: It’s not a general rule but I’m not going to pretend otherwise

Buster: Because I care about you

Rio: And I care about you, you know that

[punkscowardschampions]

Ruster Pt.1

Rio: [Okay, so Edie’s birthday is 27th October so this is then, the few days it is before the twins’ birthday/Halloween]

Rio: I wouldn’t bother you with it otherwise but today is not the day

Rio: Wherever your sister is, check her because I can’t, yeah?

Buster: Nothing would give me greater pleasure, however, we both know she can barely read

Rio: Trust me, she’ll get the message if she doesn’t stop blowing up my inbox

Buster: I don’t doubt that, it just isn’t giving me much incentive to rush to her aid nor her defence 

Rio: Have you forgotten too?

Rio: Naturally, why would anyone’s birthday but your own be in your calendar 

Buster: Our calendars are synced, it’s in there for my parents’ benefit, not that the usual [whatever baze tend to buy Edie as a gift] would have one under the circumstances

Rio: I could almost forgive her for ignoring those notifications then

Rio: but not quite, under the circumstances

Buster: Under no circumstances is she aware what day it is, our own birthday aside, as you’ve already pointed out

Buster: I wouldn’t take it quite so personally

Rio: I’ll take it as I find it 

Rio: and I don’t have the bandwidth to concern myself with her issues, real or fictionalised 

Buster: Noted

Rio: So, you’re doing nothing then

Buster: I’ll talk to her, but all the good it’ll do will likely amount to nothing, unfortunately 

Rio: Try harder

Rio: I’m not making empty threats

Buster: I’m not her keeper, regardless of the weight of the threat

Rio: Yeah, it’s really cool that you don’t care

Buster: I’ve tried hard to, you aren’t alone with the lack of Nance’s bullshit bandwidth

Rio: I really couldn’t care less about her bullshit, or yours

Rio: You have as much time as you have excuses

Buster: I have neither, keep your promises and your threats, they aren’t aimed at me

Rio: That’s two and counting, at least

Rio: but whatever

Buster: But whatever is exactly where I stand, yeah

Rio: We’ve discussed your apathy

Buster: Apathy isn’t the word

Rio: Go on

Rio: how would you dress it up

Buster: You’re dressing it up, I’ve spoken deliberately plainly

Rio: Dispassionately 

Rio: because you don’t care

Buster: I said I’ll speak to her, there’s hardly an unwillingness to take action being expressed

Rio: I know all she wants is shit to talk about with her equally boring friends

Rio: it couldn’t be any clearer than forgetting it’s Edie’s fucking birthday whilst acting like she cares to get some more info

Buster: No shit, we’re all painfully aware of her long established motives

Rio: But yeah, it must be great

Rio: for all this to just be colourful background to set you apart rather than anything you have to live through

Buster: I can’t help not living through it, being set apart by refusing to take part in her type of voyeurism will have to do

Rio: Not your problem, yeah

Rio: put us all back in the box in your head until the next holiday you’re forced to acknowledge our existence, cool

Buster: For the few remaining years I can continue to be forced to do anything, absolutely

Rio: Lucky you

Buster: You’re lucky I’m not trying to force myself front and centre and make your problems mine, that’d be worse than any of Nancy’s current exploits

Rio: Oh, am I

Rio: Yeah, someone taking all my problems away right now sounds fucking shite, you’re so right, you carry on acting like you never knew the girl

Buster: Acting like I could carry everything on my shoulders and take your problems away when I barely know the girl isn’t doing you any favours

Rio: She is your family, for fuck’s sake

Rio: Sure, Nance is gawking at the car crash but where the fuck are you, Buster?

Buster: Coming together for weddings and funerals, both literally and metaphorically, isn’t forging strong ties, I don’t know the girl, pretending I do or am qualified to lend a helping hand here wouldn’t fix a single thing

Rio: That’s bullshit

Rio: You’re a wannabe psychopath to mask what is just selfishness and self-absorption 

Buster: Platitudes are bullshit

Buster: I don’t have solutions to offer you

Rio: I didn’t ask you for solutions

Buster: You asked me to stop my sister digging, I’ll try my hardest, that’s the extent of what I can do right now

Rio: Alright

Buster: Because for the record, where I am is here, where I’ve always been

Buster: take the geographical discrepancy and emotional distance up with my parents, it was their choice

Rio: My point was that you should care that if I was there, your sister would be losing teeth, that’s all

Buster: And mine was, they’re hers to lose, especially when she deserves to do so, which it sounds as though she does

Rio: Your parents didn’t ask you to only care about yourself, even they can’t claim that level of narcissism 

Buster: My parents know actions have consequences, she’s slow to learn the fact, as she is most things

Buster: talk shit, get hit, they’d probably phrase it

Rio: That’s not how life works, if they want to find a catchy phrase for that

Buster: She isn’t my little sister and I’m not her bodyguard, she got herself into the mess, it’s down to her to get out of it, that’s how life works

Rio: Is it stubbornness or sheer stupidity with you?

Rio: Jesus

Buster: She’s accountable for her own behaviour, she’s not a baby, even if she often acts like one

Rio: It’s easier to pretend you had no idea in the aftermath than to admit you have no idea how to help now

Rio: For fuck’s sake, care, care why she’s like this

Buster: Projecting isn’t any more helpful, we’re discussing my sister not yours

Rio: No because whether you like it or not it’s your blood too

Rio: Edie is hardly the first, your own dad is minus a twin for it, you don’t get to pretend it doesn’t happen to you because you’ve got more money than you need

Buster: It isn’t happening to me, why would I co-opt her tragedy to make myself feel better or look good?

Rio: It isn’t about appearances 

Rio: I care, you should care, this can’t keep happening again and again like a goddamn curse, it has to be stopped

Buster: If I came to you with a show of caring, you’d ask why I all of a sudden do now that it’s too late

Buster: I’m no hypocrite, I don’t know her and I can’t save her

Rio: We’re talking about your sister, remember

Rio: it’s not too late

Buster: No we aren’t, my sister’s a lot of things but cursed is a stretch

Rio: She gets her personality by proxy, boring bitch is what she is

Buster: Yeah, and it definitely is too late for me to dictate who she can and can’t play with

Rio: You have the same friends

Buster: I’m yet to be boring nevertheless

Rio: Tell yourself whatever you need, it’s no concern of mine

Buster: I have no need of a sob story, particularly one that would never be able to compete

Rio: Compete with who

Buster: Take your pick, there’s no shortage

Rio: There’s yours

Rio: woe is you, you’re not going to get a trophy

Buster: Tell yourself whatever you need, babe

Rio: Do not

Buster: There’s no world in which I’m not surrounded by trophies, each of them actually earned

Rio: Cool!

Rio: Your sister got on my last nerve, you’re out of luck with whatever this is

Buster: I understand, your patronising comments sail over her head, it’s a source of frustration for me too

Rio: Brick wall would be more appealing 

Buster: Trust me, I know

Rio: Maybe you can take your frustrations out on the nearest but what help would I be to anyone then

Buster: Been there, done that

Buster: it doesn’t have much to recommend it

Rio: Anything is better than this

Buster: You could still send Nance fuck you via voice notes, I suppose

Rio: I’m serious

Rio: it’s like playing hostess at the shittest funeral possible where everyone hates the dead person and no amount of tea and sandwiches is doing anything

Buster: No amount of catering really does anything at any funeral, it’s a distraction, that’s all

Rio: It still has to be done, that’s the point you don’t get, someone has to do the shit you deem beneath you

Buster: Someone else

Buster: what I don’t get is you expecting that of me

Rio: Me, it’s always me

Buster: Because it’s a role you too willingly accept

Rio: No because everything goes to shit if it doesn’t get done, there’s no helping

Buster: Everything already has gone to shit, playing the martyr doesn’t change that

Rio: You wouldn’t know the difference between a martyr and someone helping 

Buster: I know that you always putting yourself last hasn’t helped anything or anyone

Rio: Thanks so much

Buster: You’re welcome

Rio: Don’t go switching your ambitions, you have no future in business with that level of pep talk

Buster: A pep talk wasn’t my intention

Buster: nobody else will tell you because they see your endless self-sacrifice as a positive 

Rio: They don’t see it because it doesn’t exist, nothing like this could have happened if any of us were doing as we should 

Buster: They don’t see it because it suits them to let you carry on as you are, in countless other examples I could list that aren’t this specific scenario, which obviously, nobody saw coming

Rio: We could’ve

Buster: If it was that simple, you would’ve

Rio: I wasn’t paying attention, not properly

Rio: I don’t even know now what could have possibly been more important, nothing should have been, not for me, not for any of us

Buster: It shouldn’t have been happening, it isn’t your responsibility to guess that it was

Rio: It’s my responsibility to know if my brothers and sisters are in trouble and need help

Buster: The age gap’s non-existent 

Rio: That doesn’t matter, not to me

Buster: You’re not her mother, you can’t carry that amount of grief or blame all by your fucking self

Rio: I should just let my mother then, yeah

Rio: then we all end up in care, including the newborn

Buster: She is no matter what, you can’t and don’t get to take it from her

Buster: by sheer force of will, acts of service, or whatever else

Rio: You’re wrong, I do help

Buster: I’m not saying you don’t, I’m saying there’s only so much you can do

Rio: If you can’t do everything, you’d rather do nothing

Rio: I’m not like you

Buster: You can’t pour from an empty cup, there’s the bullshit platitude you wanted earlier, you’ll hit your wall, babe

Buster: I’d rather not watch that crash

Rio: You won’t be

Buster: Good

Rio: Fuck you

Buster: If it helps

Rio: No, we’ve both been clear on that, you’re no help at all

Buster: Allow me to be even clearer, you know where I am if you need a new punching bag

Rio: Yeah right

Buster: Yeah, open ended invitation, it’s the least I can do

Rio: Pity party is no one’s theme

Buster: I don’t care about the theme, wrong twin

Rio: And you have no reason to feel sorry for me

Rio: I’m not the one spending my 14th in an asylum, for Christ’s sake

Buster: Right, pity’s off the table

Rio: There’s something

Buster: You’re welcome, again

Rio: No need to act like you’ve catered

Buster: I will

Buster: no tea and sandwiches within a hundred miles of you, I swear

Rio: Alright, maybe I can say thanks for that

Buster: Don’t

Rio: I’m not writing a note, that was it, blink and you miss it

Buster: Shame, I bet you have stunning stationery 

Rio: I had no idea you lived in the past as well as London

Buster: Fine, I won’t write you a letter either

Rio: As if you’d have anything to write but platitudes and pleasantries anyway

Buster: If you say so

Rio: Shut up, you aren’t mysterious

Buster: I wasn’t claiming to be

Rio: Just that we barely know each other, sure

Rio: Now’s really the time to start, is it

Buster: I said I barely know Edie

Buster: I know you

Rio: Do you

Buster: Yeah

Rio: You should know her too, there’s no gap, you said

Buster: Well I don’t, whether that’s my own fault, hers or we’re calling it a team effort

Rio: Maybe

Rio: I don’t know anymore, everything looks wrong

Buster: Of course it does, everything is wrong

Rio: And what, I’m meant to just accept that?

Buster: No, you’re meant to try and make it better, but if it was that easy you wouldn’t be sat here talking to me, you’d be doing it

Rio: You were telling me off for trying 5 seconds ago

Buster: Your methods are fucked, the idea is sound

Rio: The floor is open for suggestions

Buster: You wish my ego was that size

Rio: I wish you being a know-it-all came in handy just once

Buster: I wish it came in handy this once too

Rio: Yeah

Rio: obviously it’s not your responsibility, sorry etc etc

Buster: I’d still take full, if I seriously could

Rio: But I’m a martyr, hypocrite, we’re not so different

Buster: I’m never going to apologise for being one for you, that once, that difference

Rio: Did you mean it

Rio: if I promise not to smack Nance, I can show at your party?

Buster: You haven’t made me angry enough to say something I don’t mean

Buster: and that includes you being free to smack Nance if it’ll make you feel even slightly better

Rio: Probably not

Rio: too easy, right but the rest can hardly hurt

Buster: Me then, I meant that as well

Buster: and it would hardly hurt me

Rio: I’ve not completely lost it

Rio: I’m not going to hit you

Buster: I wasn’t going to offer you a foam covered bat like you’d be given in a therapist’s office, but suit yourself

Rio: Oh right, I forgot you hit people for sport

Rio: I’m sure that’s entirely different and not at all crazy

Buster: Correct, it is

Rio: Mhmm

Buster: You have no future as a sparring partner, noted

Rio: I’m hardly in your weight class, cheater

Buster: I’d have let you win, it’s the chivalrous thing to do, cheating or not

Rio: There you go talking like you’re from another century again

Buster: Where?

Rio: Chivalry is so long dead, babe

Buster: Because your boyfriends can’t spell it, aim higher

Rio: Ha ha 

Rio: Irrelevant because I’m never going to get another boyfriend again, last thing on my mind as it may be now

Buster: Never again is irrelevant because it’s ridiculous 

Rio: Oh yeah, who wants to touch this mess? No one good

Buster: Oh please, you’re not a mess

Rio: Convincing

Buster: Coming from me it isn’t likely to be, but that doesn’t make it any less true

Rio: How is she meant to ever leave that place, never is when this will stop being talked about, that’s true

Buster: When she’s strong enough she won’t listen to what’s said, her priority’ll be getting out and moving on in spite of all that

Buster: you said it, this isn’t the first time, none of us are strangers to being talked about, this is worse than most of what’s happened before, yeah, but she’ll find a way

Rio: I hope you’re right about this one

Rio: doesn’t seem possible yet

Buster: I’m rarely wrong, you’ll see

Rio: You’re just annoying then

Buster: Isn’t the word, no, you’re wrong

Rio: You don’t get to pick the word

Buster: You aren’t picking what you would if you were being honest

Rio: Why would I lie?

Buster: This isn’t truth or dare, for one

Buster: and the other reasons why are numerous

Rio: I’ve made enough of a show of myself, trust me, it’s a bit late for saving face like that

Buster: Not in front of me, not since [some event ages ago that’s giving family function before all this drama when times were happier]

Rio: You’re such an arsehole to not only remember that but bring it up now, oh my God

Buster: I remember everything, I’m blessed like that instead of being cursed

Rio: Well I remember [and throw back a similar moment for him, ofc]

Buster: So do I [and put your spin on how it went so it’s less embarrassing because you have no shame and have always gotta win/come off looking as good as you can]

Rio: Pink suits you, rose-coloured glasses

Buster: I’ll float it as a birthday theme, because true, it’s a flattering colour on both of us

Rio: I’m sure she has unlimited options

Buster: I’d bet her card limit on it

Rio: You’re welcome for the idea

Buster: And you’re welcome to dress however you like, regardless of her chosen theme

Buster: you’re my guest, if you show up

Rio: I already don’t want to be here

Rio: but I’m terrified to leave

Buster: I know, or there’d already be a plane ticket booked in your name

Rio: It’s like we have to be on permanent best behaviour or else the worst is going to happen

Rio: but that’s the last thing you want when that gives you so much time to be sat with your thoughts about the even worse shit that’s already happened

Buster: No worse can happen, you’ve admitted it, give yourself permission to do something you want

Buster: one thing for yourself, to prove the world isn’t going to end again if nothing else

Rio: It only sounds that simple

Buster: Shit’s allowed to be, sometimes

Rio: Says who?

Buster: Come on, humour me

Buster: What would you do?

Rio: One thing for myself is so vague

Buster: Try harder, you’ve got a hypothetical night off from this bullshit and…?

Rio: There is no night off

Rio: even hypothetically, it’s only coming by getting blackout, so I guess that’s what I would do

Buster: [catch this boy sending a case of whatever her fave booze is to her house, not that she’ll know yet]

Buster: At least you’re playing the game, that’s a start

Rio: [me like you’re both 14 and her mother is gonna have to sign for that lmao but still a sweet gesture god bless]

Rio: This is all in the make-believe where I can get in that state and not have to worry about it getting back to some social worker, of course

Buster: Of course

Rio: and everyone knows everyone ‘round here…

Buster: The closest thing to a curse I’m under

Rio: No one should accuse your parents of being unfit

Rio: power of money for you, like

Buster: Once upon a time they would have

Rio: And do you think they were, once upon a time?

Buster: No, but I don’t think they should be classed as related either, which was also up for debate

Rio: Biology doesn’t lie

Buster: Regrettably, in the case of Nance being my sister

Rio: Blood’s not everything though

Buster: It matters but it isn’t all that does

Rio: Django isn’t related to any of us at all, he’s still our brother

Buster: He shares some blood with the newborn

Rio: That’s true

Rio: I don’t see them being the closer for it though, not with everything

Buster: It would take a miracle and none of us are make-believing that hard

Rio: I can’t trust anyone now, any man

Buster: He took things to an extreme that not many men would

Rio: Yeah and before that he was nice, being a dad to all of us

Buster: The point is, he isn’t any kind of benchmark, he’s an anomaly 

Rio: I don’t know

Buster: There’s men you can trust, there will be

Rio: Another hypothetical is all that is but yeah

Buster: Speaking as one, no it isn’t

Rio: I didn’t accuse you or all men of being that type of anomaly 

Rio: it’s okay, you don’t have to defend yourself, like

Buster: I’m not, I’m reassuring you

Rio: You’re cute

Buster: Irrelevant and I’m well aware of it

Rio: Not that kind of cute, bighead

Buster: Nice, but barely believable, save

Rio: You’re right, your personality could be called many things but cute probably ain’t it

Buster: You’re hilarious, babe

Rio: I don’t feel funny right now, as it goes

Buster: And yet

Buster: I’m glad your sense of humour must be one of the last things to go

Rio: You’re horrid, I’m not dead

Buster: You’re not and neither’s Edie, remember that, yeah?

Rio: I will

Rio: I do, sorry for this

Buster: Don’t

Rio: What else can I say

Buster: Anything, I’m listening

Buster: and I do care

Rio: I can’t remember saying you don’t, if that’s consolation

Buster: I’d let it kill me, but where’s the consolation in that, for anyone?

Rio: You’re who you’re needed to be too

Buster: Everyone is, unless they’re my useless sister

Rio: It just feels like it might be nice to swap right now, you know

Buster: I’ll let you take a turn blowing out the candles too then, she doesn’t need to know

Rio: I’ve got a few days to work out the perfect wish

Buster: And outfit, even if the theme changes a hundred times over at the last minute, as per usual

Rio: How else would you ensure you look better than everyone else, of course

Rio: cheap trick but 

Buster: I wouldn’t resort to tricks, it’s a guarantee I’ll look a treat, naturally

Rio: It naturally won’t be you changing the theme

Rio: but I’ve got it out of my system so I’m not going to say anything else mean about her

Buster: Shame, you were a natural at it

Rio: You’ll miss the company, more like

Buster: You have no shortage of company, plenty of other people have years of pent up anger they’d love an opportunity to direct towards her

Buster: myself excluded, so you will have to miss me

Rio: Said as if that made me feel better

Buster: Said as if anything could

Rio: Ignoring it for even an hour, that’s all that can

Buster: At the party you’ll have less of a hypothetical night off

Rio: And if anyone asks, we’re having a family-friendly wholesome time, yeah?

Buster: Who’s asking me?

Rio: I mean your parents will let me stay

Rio: 14 year old takes weekend trip to other country alone doesn’t sound great

Buster: It’s a [however long it is, about half an hour I think but cba to check] long flight, you’re not running away to New Zealand to solo travel

Buster: and obviously they’ll let you stay, I’d only book you a secret hotel room if it was your stolen birthday wish

Rio: Oh, I forgot you had so many dealings with the social

Rio: best behaviour, remember

Rio: and no matter how annoying your sister is, I’d never waste a wish like that

Buster: I know how to behave, keep a secret and sweet talk authority figures, I don’t know when you forgot

Rio: Stakes are a bit higher than [some childish hijinks y’all got up to obviously]

Buster: You can trust me

Rio: For the weekend

Buster: I won’t let Nance post anything of you that contradicts your good girl image

Rio: None of my behaviour will, naturally

Rio: but I appreciate the lookout

Buster: I appreciate your RSVP

Rio: When’s the last time I saw you for one of your birthdays, when I wasn’t invited just by Nance?

Buster: [whenever it was because ofc he remembers]

Rio: Aw

Rio: you really were cute back then

Buster: I’m cuter now, you just refuse to acknowledge it

Rio: So what if I did

Rio: you don’t need telling

Buster: That’s exactly what I need

Rio: Then wish for it, birthday boy

Buster: Tell me

Rio: That easy?

Rio: I don’t think so, where’s the fun in that

Buster: I dare you 

Rio: Are you going to pick truth?

Buster: Do you have a question you want to ask or is this another hypothetical?

Rio: Going first too, how gentlemanly of you

Buster: Taking into consideration I don’t tend to lie, it’s less of a gesture, if that’s any consolation

Rio: You count it as one of your strengths, do you

Rio: Maybe you want to hear how always brutally honest you are instead then

Buster: Why wouldn’t I? It is a strength

Buster: the weakness comes from those who can’t handle said honesty

Rio: You can be such a cliche sometimes

Buster: Cliches exist for a reason, no one’s unique, sorry to burst the bubble your mum raised you in

Rio: Bit late for that, apology not needed from you

Buster: Don’t worry, it wasn’t sincerely given nor meant

Rio: Honesty doesn’t equate with sincerity, shocker

Buster: You used the word brutal

Rio: That’s the only type of honesty guys like you value

Buster: You would use the phrase guys like me and still claim I’m the cliche

Rio: Says the boy who’s trying to get me to #notallmen for the second time in this convo

Buster: Well, would you prefer I joined in with your all men are bastards attitude? Because I can try, but you also cried out for sincerity and I can’t say my heart will be in it

Rio: You’re good, the disingenuousness would be too much to bear

Rio: just don’t act like I’m crazy for it

Buster: I haven’t, enough men are bastards, I’m not denying that

Rio: Be a bad horse to back, yeah

Rio: Whatever, I’m sick of talking about it, having to be that man-hater 

Buster: Then don’t, we can talk about anything 

Buster: or nothing, the ball’s in your court

Rio: What’s happening in your normal, not fucked life then, tell me about that

Buster: [do, I shan’t because frankly who cares about your school or sports antics sir not I]

Rio: You can tell me the stuff you’d leave out of the brochure, too

Rio: Your life can’t be that well-maintained 

Buster: You’ll be at the party, tell me yourself

Rio: Guess so

Rio: Do I have a +1 or

Buster: Do you want a plus-one?

Rio: I could bring a friend

Buster: As long as they don’t lead you astray from your best behaviour

Rio: You want me to bring someone boring?

Rio: Seems legit

Buster: I don’t want you to end up in care, that’s all

Rio: Thanks

Rio: Mum keeps assuring me it won’t happen, that everything is good but they see if you have suitable family before doing all that even if

Rio: what if none of them are, though, there’s nan and grandad and then I have my other nan, the records aren’t squeaky clean

Buster: I mean, nan is a social worker, that has to count for something

Rio: Unless they just think she’s as bad as they are

Buster: True, a hindrance more than a help would be in keeping with the majority of this family’s luck

Rio: I’m so fucking sick of the bad luck

Buster: You’re swapping, remember

Buster: Nance’s isn’t that much better but it isn’t that much worse, at least

Rio: What did we do to deserve it, seriously

Rio: who fucked up so bad for this karma 

Buster: There’s no such thing

Rio: Evidence suggests otherwise at this point

Buster: Personal experience suggests it’s a girl’s name not a viable scapegoat

Rio: There’s nothing she could have done to ever deserve that

Buster: Exactly, bad shit happens to good people and vice versa

Buster: deserved isn’t the word in this context

Rio: Tell that to the jury, literal and symbolic

Buster: If I was anywhere near qualified in time, I would

Rio: Okay, you’re cute, you earnt it

Buster: Still not a law degree but I’ll take it

Rio: I’ll let you know when I’m qualified to give those out

Buster: Thanks

Rio: Your life sounds so simple

Rio: maybe I will get her to swap, as she loves the drama so much, apparently

Buster: She wouldn’t last a second but that won’t be your problem, no takebacks

Rio: Your parents would be grateful of the better grades, you’d have her out of your hair, no problems in this plan

Buster: Our parents could’ve been in this position themselves had they’d been old enough to make that plan, you’d think she’d have a degree of awareness if not anything resembling empathy 

Rio: Nothing is real to her

Rio: and I suppose I can’t fault her that naivety, I wish none of it felt real to me, just stories people have but you can’t really believe went down

Buster: It’s a luxury nobody else can afford, why should she?

Rio: I don’t know

Rio: but you can’t say anything, unless she’s talking about it in front of you, I’m not a snitch I just needed to vent so I didn’t say some shit to her I’d regret

Buster: I know

Rio: However tempting it may be to chew her out

Rio: it’ll happen if she’s as oblivious as she was with me in front of your mum and dad so

Buster: Which she’s bound to be

Rio: Heaven help her

Buster: Deserved is the perfect word in that instance

Rio: Maybe but

Rio: I didn’t say that

Buster: No, I did, and I’d say the same to her face, conceding too that the word brutal does actually fit there in front of that honesty

Rio: I know you would

Rio: I don’t know how you manage to operate in the same friendship groups though, that makes no sense to me

Buster: We don’t, she has new friends every week

Rio: I see

Buster: I’m not surprised you haven’t noticed though, they don’t differ greatly from the old, that’s how she operates

Rio: It’s a certain brand, yeah

Rio: 🍾💎💋

Buster: That’s why I organise my own guest list in addition to hers

Rio: You’re more selective

Rio: I could use the distraction so not braindead is a bonus

Buster: No need to use your birthday wish

Rio: You wouldn’t like it if I called you my fairy godmother 

Buster: You wouldn’t say it to my face

Rio: Challenge accepted

Rio: after the obligatory wishing you a happy birthday, still have manners

Buster: One way to get you to agree to hit me, birthday beatings are obligatory as well, after all

Rio: Why do you want me to hurt you so bad?

Buster: It isn’t about me, you’ll feel better

Rio: I don’t think I will though

Buster: A temporary reprieve is still a reprieve, and this one works

Rio: You’re not going to try to be as annoying as possible to make me punch you, are you

Rio: because I’ll just stay home, like

Buster: Come to the party, I have manners of my own

Rio: If you insist

Buster: I’m sorting out the guest room as we speak

Buster: Would you like your towels shaped into a swan or a heart?

Rio: Stop it

Rio: Which one is harder? 🤔

Buster: Neither are hard, that's why they’re a hotel staple, but given how much you love a cliche, how could I resist?

Buster: I’ll do both, you don’t have to rush off and you’re maybe bringing a friend

Rio: *you, love a cliche

Rio: But I’m not going to complain

Rio: I might bring a friend, as another correction but we’ll see how I feel

Buster: I already said maybe, you love trying to correct me

Rio: Maybe I really don’t wanna share my towel origami, yeah, shh

Buster: My personal touches would maybe fall flat with someone I don’t know, yeah

Buster: but if you’re determined to set the challenge by bringing a plus-one, I am to rise to it

Rio: You promised interesting company, it might be better to leave home fully behind

Buster: I’ll be there, that’s a promise, can’t really leave my own birthday behind even when it is shared

Rio: You’ll be far too busy

Buster: What I choose to be busy with is my prerogative as guest of honour, I didn’t invite you to abandon you in a corner, or worse, Nancy’s company

Rio: You don’t have to look after me

Rio: I don’t do corners at parties

Buster: I know I don’t

Buster: and I know you don’t, typically, but you’re in a far from typical situation

Rio: I’ll be fun, I promise

Buster: You don’t have to make me promises

Rio: I’m just saying, I know the score, I’m not going to come just to bring the vibe down, I want to have a good time

Buster: And you will, because there’s no pressure

Rio: A party not a pop quiz, I know

Rio: I’ll get you presents at the airport though, town isn’t somewhere I wanna be right now

Buster: Wrong twin, I’m not demanding gifts at the door or that you wear a mask for me, literally or metaphorically

Rio: You know me better than to think I’ll turn up empty-handed

Buster: It’s a swap, you’re the one who’ll have a present waiting

Buster: and you know me, I’ve already bought something, so you can’t refuse

Rio: What do you want, seriously, in return

Rio: You can’t just do all this 

Buster: You’re too late to stop me, it’s done

Rio: But I want to do something nice for you too

Buster: You’ll be dressed nice for me

Rio: 🩰🧁🌷 I remember

Rio: I’m already planning, swear

Buster: Good, we’ll both have no reason not to play nice too 

Buster: a truce, for the weekend

Rio: Oh, so you were gonna be a dick if I looked a mess 😅 Real charming, that

Buster: I’d have to say something, but you’re fine, that’s a hypothetical in no danger of actually taking place

Rio: Too right

Rio: you’ll have to start being nice to me all the time

Buster: Jesus, imagine

Rio: Ha ha

Buster: Have you booked a flight yet?

Rio: [show him the flights you’re currently looking up]

Rio: When should I get there?

Buster: Allow me

Buster: [do and send her the deets because baze would have all kinds of perks for being frequent fliers for work and pleasure so it makes sense you’re not just doing it to be that bitch, although we all know you also are]

Rio: It’s a date then

Buster: Yeah

Rio: Feels like forever since [the last time y’all met up for a fam function which was probably Fearghal’s bday in the summer]

Buster: A lifetime ago in terms of how much has happened

Rio: Seriously

Buster: Aside from Nance, we’re all different people now

Rio: I liked who you were, for the record

Buster: No you didn’t, not since [a time that’s deliberately giving before their truth or dare kiss]

Rio: You try to be unlikeable on purpose

Rio: doesn’t mean it works

Buster: You used to look for the good in people, doesn’t mean it’s there

Rio: Come on

Rio: if anything I have every right now to call the normal good people from the pure evil

Buster: I am who I am, babe

Buster: you don’t have the right to try and change me

Rio: Am I trying? No

Buster: Trying to borrow the rose-tinted glasses you said looked better on me

Rio: Fine, whatever

Rio: I was only playing nice

Buster: Practice makes perfect

Rio: Something like that

Buster: You will be on the night then

Rio: I won’t make you say it

Buster: I’ll say what I want

Rio: It’s your party

Rio: how the saying goes, right?

Buster: Ours

Rio: I keep forgetting

Buster: I’ll keep reminding you

Rio: Does this mean I get to keep my own wishes in December too?

Buster: If anyone is owed double, you are

Rio: I feel bad for how much I’m looking forward to this

Buster: Saying what I’m about to makes it sound like she’s dead, but nevertheless, I don’t think she’d want that

Rio: It’s the others more, they need me

Rio: but I need this

Buster: It wouldn’t be a lie to tell you I need you

Buster: if only for the swap to go ahead

Rio: Say that again

Buster: And so these towels aren’t wasted

Rio: That is unthinkable

Buster: Think about how much I need you, for all the aforementioned reasons

Rio: That’s why I’m coming, no matter how guilty I might feel, I need to

Buster: You have to, or you’d feel even guiltier that I’ve used my wish to blackmail you into attending

Rio: Don’t waste it, I really, really want to

Buster: [not you paying to change her flight so it’s earlier because you really want her to too, send her those new deets]

Rio: You’re spoiling me

Buster: Not yet

Rio: I’d be there now if I could

Buster: You’re not allowed to arrive before your gift does though, then I would have to spoil you with a shopping trip

Rio: You love shopping, we’ve never not had that in common, whoever you’re being at the time

Buster: The guest room’s finished, maybe I’ll go, now that you’ve given your permission for me to buy you more

Rio: Maybe deserve isn’t the right word but

Rio: I like letting you treat me like this

Buster: It’s your birthday

Rio: Yeah, and yours

Buster: And I don’t mind sharing with you

Rio: I’m better company, not that it’s a brag but that’s not my fault

Rio: you’ll take me shopping the day after, for real?

Buster: [list all the fancy shops you’re going to take her to and where for lunch etc like a lil itinerary]

Rio: You’re the best cousin I have

Buster: [show her that it’s in your calendar which means Nancy can see it because the calendars are synced because the opposite of sneaking behind anyone’s back about this, we’re letting the girl know, sucks to suck]

Buster: not a brag either but of course I am

Rio: Say it back, don’t be mean

Buster: You’ve always been my favourite, you know that

Rio: You’re mine

Rio: everyone knows that

Buster: You deserve effort being made for you, to cheer you up

Buster: I want to

Rio: You want to spend time with me too

Buster: Everyone knows that

Rio: I’m yours, all weekend

Buster: I’m not letting you out of my sight all weekend

Rio: I’m not bringing a friend

Buster: Nancy would only back them into a corner, she has no manners

Rio: You must’ve got them all

Buster: I got everything

Rio: I find it hard to disagree from here

Buster: You’ll find it harder in person

Rio: Good

Rio: I missed you, this

Buster: It’s been such a long time

Rio: You’re so far away

Buster: But it’s the shortest flight, I promise

Rio: And you’ll be all there when I am, give me full attention and full you, not the bullshit

Buster: No bullshit

Rio: Promise

Buster: You need this, I haven’t forgotten

Rio: That’s not a promise but okay

Buster: I swear, okay?

Rio: I swear you’re going to have the best birthday now, regardless of the rest, I’ll make it happen for you

Buster: You too, babe

Buster: What do you want me to spit or bleed on?

Rio: The possibilities…

Rio: bleed onto your shirt, I have faith in your family’s dry cleaners to fix that after

Buster: [we all know he’s doing it rn immediately and showing her because promises, can’t be tamed]

Rio: Fuck, alright

Rio: my turn, deals a deal

Buster: Spit, I don’t want you to hurt yourself

Rio: Now I look mean

Rio: kiss it better for me and tell me where

Buster: [absolutely does not need to make a song and dance of showing her this but absolutely is]

Rio: Baby boy 🥺

Buster: Now you love a cliche

Rio: You started it

Buster: You made me promise

Rio: You didn’t have to

Buster: I did

Rio: Well, don’t be grossed out but

Rio: [gotta give him your side of said promise because mutual]

Buster: I can’t change your flight again, I’d be in so much trouble

Rio: I better not get you in trouble whilst I’m trying to be good

Buster: That said, the promise wasn’t that I would be

Buster: [and do change it again just cos]

Rio: 😍

Rio: I can feel the distance becoming less and less

Buster: I’m looking forward to seriously feeling you near me

Rio: I love being in your company

Buster: Enough to reconsider your stance on corners? Because there are so many we could be alone in

Rio: It’s our party, we can be alone as we want

Rio: show me the benefits

Buster: You’ll have a favourite by the time I’ve shown you them all

Rio: I already miss you when I leave

Buster: I could always wish that you’re not allowed to leave

Rio: It’s worth the try, hypothetical doesn’t count as you telling me, it could still work

Buster: Or you try, you didn’t say anything about wishing, don’t and it’ll definitely work

Rio: 🤐

Rio: Wouldn’t that be nice

Buster: We’d both have the best birthday, that’s all I want

Rio: Me too

Rio: well, of things that I can control, can actually happen

Rio: that could

Buster: Is your half term the same as mine?

Buster: [and the dates because there is always one at the end of October - Monday 28 October 2024 to Friday 1 November 2024 for example but we could do it to suit ourselves]

Rio: It is, yeah

Buster: I haven’t booked your return yet, let’s make it happen

Rio: Is it too long though

Buster: It isn’t long enough, but it’s better than the weekend

Rio: I need to think about it, with a clearer head than I am right now

Buster: You’ll be more use to everyone back there once I’ve spent time taking care of you here

Rio: That makes sense, I know it does

Buster: You know I can make you feel better, give me the chance to

Rio: I’ll ask

Rio: if my ma doesn’t just seem like she’s saying yes for an easy life, that she thinks its a good idea too

Buster: It is and she will, I don’t have bad ideas

Rio: You know what I think of it as an idea, I don’t need to say

Buster: What you need to do is go and ask her

Rio: You have no patience, boy

Buster: I’m waiting

Rio: I’m asking

Rio: when she’s [done whatever she is doing because lbr, v fucking busy right now and we aren’t gonna bowl up unannounced like hello mother lol]

Buster: Good girl

Rio: Buster

Buster: Rio

Rio: Still no sympathy, right?

Buster: No, never

Rio: Good

Buster: I told you, you can trust me

Rio: I do

Rio: it just feels like there should be a catch

Buster: The catch is, I can’t actually prevent you from leaving, not yet, you’re still going to have to eventually

Rio: As far as catches go, that one I can handle 

Buster: The rest’s just me trying to catch you before you fall further

Rio: I’m not falling

Buster: You were, but I don’t want to have to handle this bullshit putting more distance between us

Rio: I don’t know if I can be who I was before, that’s all

Rio: she doesn’t make sense anymore

Buster: I’m not asking you to go back, I think you should do the opposite, moving forward is the only thing that ever truly makes sense

Rio: It’d be an easier way to live if what’s waiting for me forward wasn’t so terrifying but I get what you’re saying

Buster: I’ll make it easier then

Rio: Just like that?

Buster: I’ll keep giving you things to look forward to, yeah

Rio: It’s too much to expect, I know that’s not your role

Buster: Don’t underestimate me, babe

Rio: I’m not, I’m just not making you promise

Buster: I’ll show you, there’s a promise and a threat

Rio: I’m not scared

Buster: What are you?

Rio: You want me to say it?

Rio: even though I can’t take it back if I do

Buster: Tell me

Rio: Yours

Rio: that’s how I feel right now

Buster: That’s been a constant for as long as I can remember

Rio: I’ve never said it before

Buster: We didn’t realise how quickly everything can turn to shit before, our priorities were different

Rio: I can’t make everything worse for them

Buster: I know everyone thinks I’m a selfish prick but I’d never encourage you to do that, it’s the last thing I want

Rio: You aren’t that much of a selfish prick

[punkscowardschampions]

Edam Pt.2

Edie: [breathing out like you’ve been holding it in since you last saw him, so heavily and shaky because all the things unsaid at this point that have to be ‘I weren’t sure, that you’d be fussed’ not like because you’re a dick but because he’s in his own rough place and maybe he wanted alone time, it’d be valid]

Liam: [‘I was after being on my own til it went from a taste to a stomach full’ because isn’t that always the tea, you think that’s what you want until you get too much of it and then you’re like oh, touching her face about it because so glad she’s here now that cannot be overstated]

Edie: [when that’s entirely TOO relatable a mood and the noise you make in response is a little too strangled because you can’t even get into it, so touching his face back with the !! you’re not verbalising]

Liam: [bringing back his sister’s safety in numbers saying being repeated like I did in the other convo we did because something she said and something he’s saying really quietly but sincerely now to show that she’s here and he doesn’t intend to let her go]

Edie: [‘now I know you’re sick of it’ quietly too, practically against his skin, wherever that is, literally against his cheek if that’s where you still are, face to face, because want nothing more than to go back to spending all your time together like you did]

Liam: [‘you know I weren’t of you’ because too true and even though she does know that he’s gotta say it nevertheless, in her ear I’m sure even though it’s slightly louder than what he just said and not at all a whisper, just to be there in that close proximity]

Edie: [nodding your I know, microscopically because you don’t want to even accidentally move him away an inch here, the opposite thus pulling him into a hug with a dramatic roll that being on a bouncy castle provides you ‘can I stay here tonight?’]

Liam: [breathing into her ear the way she breathed into his neck before just !! for a sec as she pulls him into this hug before he’s hugging her back so tightly there’s absolutely 0 question of her going anywhere else ever even a mm away from him] 

Edie: [SQUEEZING him with all your strength here because the only way to express how you feel about that/him without fully dropping an L bomb tbh, freeing his hand from this snuggle so you can look at his tattoo again, tracing the rest of your name next to this E]

Liam: [the way I just know that as he’s watching her do this he’s this close to telling her to get the stick and poke stuff back out and do it but kiss her instead so you don’t, dramatically from wherever you are whether that’s her neck or wherever just launching his face at the nearest skin so !!]

Edie: [biting your own lip to stop a moan being fully realised and released here, the force this takes being fully put into how hard this biting is, only stopping to kiss him back, not on the lips but also wherever you can reach, covering so much skin like you cannot wait a second longer and how long you have waited means you need to be this extra]

Liam: [likewise cannot wait a second longer to kiss her on the mouth so dragging her face to his from wherever hers has landed when he decides he simply must, with so much !! that his hands are once again buried in her hair even when they are basically clamped to the sides of her face, so tangled up rn in his quest to intensely makeout, tasting the blood on her lip I know is there from how hard she bit it and doing his own moan fully against said lips]

Edie: [I know your heads are clonking together, along with your teeth because the haste is so real and there’s no time to care about anything but being as close as you can in every way that you can, grinning into this makeout at his moan, so happy about it as well as a little justifiably smug, pulling his face into yours again despite him not having moved, via the chain he had on in the pics posted]

Liam: [1000% the vibe, not that y’all will care at all about the collision any more than he’d notice or care atm if that chain literally snapped, all that matters is making out like your lives depend on it, hence his hands going to her waist to pull her body closer against his as they do, even though that’s practically impossible I’m sure, and then under her shirt because cba to take even a sec to unbutton it, we’re still all haste here]

Edie: [‘you feel-’ as you are pawing at his body the way you were just covering him in kisses, like you can’t leave a single part untouched and you need to touch all of him right now and that’s true]

Liam: [if she has belt loops again dragging her closer via them as she says this because hard agree with that sentiment, and if she doesn’t, literally dragging her via the fabric where they would be, I can’t tell from the pic, the point is that he needs to make their bodies crash together the same way their mouths did rn immediately and over and over again as she touches him so that she can feel the blatant reaction those touches are having]

Edie: [lacing your arms around his neck so you can only use your body now to touch his, being entirely blatant with where and how, looking down to watch this happen and your breathing is going WILD]

Liam: [his gaze following hers to watch too and his own breathing basically matching hers, no notes, they are just very in sync here in this moment, but ofc he can’t resist maintaining some more insane EYE CONTACT then because we love the contrast of how dark his eyes are and how blue hers are, very jali of you guys]

Edie: [‘I can’t believe it’s you’ being blurted out as you are staring into his very dark eyes because you simply cannot, how you feel about it being him though is very obvious and is backed up with you restarting a fevered makeout the second you’ve let that land]

Liam: [‘who else’ as a statement not a question like ily and you’re my best friend etc because he doesn’t know there has been so that isn’t even occurring to him he only means it in the sense of this feeling so right here and now and so fated in that it was always meant to be happening at some point however derailed they got by the grief and the bad times, getting that out despite kissing her as hard and as dramatically]

Edie: [gotta launch yourself at him with slightly more than haste because you don’t want to think about the question it wasn’t intended to be but is]

Liam: [my boo says distract distract and it will because he’s just a boy and he won’t think anything of it when it’s the mood y’all are already in, it isn’t like it’s coming from nowhere or is a completely different energy]

Edie: [you’ll get away with it and no one can blame either of y’all for that, you want to be in the here and now and that’s the realest so go ahead and keep making out you crazy kids]

Liam: [take this opportunity to touch her the most indecently for the first time whilst making out because she did him earlier when we wanted to cockblock y’all from a full hookup but he didn’t her because he was far too distracted by being killed, there’s only a trouser button and zip stopping you sir (which you can look at her as you undo to make sure she’s down for this) and we love that for you though I very much hope he doesn’t have nosy neighbours or a very overlooked garden]

Edie: [it’s okay bouncy castles usually are hard to see in because they’re so big or have a sort of mesh top anyway, not that y’all would care because she is down even if she’s SHOOK to finally be touched by you thus looking at him with giant eyes about it]

Liam: [because he is weird and can’t just be touching her in a straightforward manner I imagine him doing a cupped hand like when you drink from a tap even though he isn’t immediately licking it like a feral hog or anything the way that gesture suggests though, probably because he’s getting distracted by touching her both with the part of his hand she bit earlier and where his tattoo is, gotta be done before he’s actually doing any fingering lol, I dread to think what he’s finally doing then, all sorts of random gestures and movements rather than just a standard curl because experimenting here with what she might like and only listening to/watching/ caring about what her reactions are as opposed to doing what’s normal here, soz not soz he’s vibing]

Edie: [giving him the truest definition of heart eyes she has ever because this is everything as well as it’s beyond adorable, wanting to tell him you love him so badly but you dare not so your lips keep moving but never forming a full word, mouthed or spoken aloud, putting your hand over his not in a showing him what to do way but purely wanting to hold his hand, gasping at the inevitable but accidental extra pressure you have added doing this, breathing out ‘what does it feel like?’ because always]

Liam: [I love that and I love that y’all are defs handholding throughout this even when he’s taking these antics more seriously (and giving her massive hearteyes back obvs) ‘your turn to be asked’ cos duh this is the one time he wants to know without a shadow of a doubt how she feels as he’s committing to try and do the most]

Edie: [doing the kind of come on laugh because it’s really obvious to the point you’re then going bright red about it but you’re still holding his hand and still looking at him because only embarrassed in a good way not like mortified and must stop obvs]

Liam: [grinning because it is obvious and we’re buzzing about this because imagine if y’all went this far only to flop now that you’re doing more than just kiss, it would be beyond awks and friendship ruining so thank god you aren’t, do the opposite of flopping please by adding such slow but intense kissing to the antics you’re already doing]

Edie: [have your slow jam makeout because the vibes are immaculate and nothing is getting ruined until it REALLY does by the murder lmao, letting y’all have basically a perfect first time because if anything warrants it, it would be what is about to go down, so obviously we’re slowly but determinedly undressing you as much as we can/need to to try and further this, moving our head back to ask the question with the pause in proceedings/our eyes]

Liam: [I agree, it would be the most evil thing ever all things considered to not let you have it be perfect given that he won’t be sleeping with anyone for a long time and her first time was literally with her own father, y’all need this to be going well and therefore it will and he’ll obviously answer with his eyes that he’s down to do this]

Edie: [as gross and depressing as that is, you aren’t thinking about him right now like he would want you to be but you do have the knowledge of having done this before to help you not feel totally lost with it so that is something]

Liam: [we simply will not be giving you the satisfaction sir, RIP, this boy has enthusiasm and that as a combo will be enough because me and my boo say so, we’re not letting this go wrong (besides the accidental pregnancy of it all)]

Edie: [oh btw, I should mention that in my head the reason there’s never a horrible freakout/need for DNA testing is because she makes Moses wear condoms because what are you gonna do otherwise, sir and yeah, you’re probably finding out you’re pregnant when you go to hospital for the menty issues because they always check there’s no possibility before medicating you and whatnot so yeah throw that out there]

Liam: [that’s a good point boo can’t be relying on the preferred gypsy method of pulling out when you’re committing incest with your child and don’t wanna be found out and that tracks perfectly as a how and when to find out given that the poor girl is a bit distracted by grief and murder and whatnot prior to then, soz for making baby Libi prem so you have less time to get your head around it and there is even more drama but Winnie says he’s not soz at all]

Edie: [I am sure you want to and try to convince her but no, not happening, can be as mad as you want we draw the line lmao but yeah and even if y’all convince the jury that Edie had as little to do with this as possible, she’ll still have a social worker and they’d still be like umm therapy immediately so it’ll be quick to get in and lowkey mandatory so yeah, soz baby Libi then tries to kill you and die herself, definitely needed on top of this situation but you know, we move]

Liam: [anyway, the question is do we wanna cut our losses and leave this here for now or shall we carry on and try and do the incest reveal and murder plotting?]

Edie: [how are you feeling? This is a good place to leave it if you’re now wanting to do something else we’ve been thinking/talking about so there’s no real loss, this whole plot is always gonna be here to do and we’ll likely redo many a time so]

Liam: [I feel blah but I’d feel that if we started something new too because we haven’t written for a sec so that’s not very helpful of me I’m aware, tempted to try something else because I don’t wanna do the next bit badly as it’s important but I was excited about doing this so I’m also like maybe we should try and push through and see if we can get that back?]

Edie: [do you think it’d be easier to be doing non-brackets or it’s just how important this is? I’m chill either way honestly, if you want to keep trying we can]

Liam: [let’s carry on then, fuck it, we can always delete it if I flop]

Edie: [in fairness we can get it out of brackets because you’re probably/lowkey obviously having some kind of freakout post this and are gonna be like I gotta go, which would be so confusing/lovely, soz Liam, it’s the trauma, just running away which is at least better than going silent which is what you would still do with your dad which he would just love, we know, yikes]

Liam: [my boo says happy birthday Liam and she also said Moses if you don’t want that kind of reaction maybe don’t have sex with your child and she’s so right for that, but yeah valid, as is the fact that what he said the first time we did this convo about having everything written down and on the record so even if it was an irl convo he’d still be like okay but you’ve gotta leave the evidence there too for the future police snoop]

Edie: [mhmm, soz boy, like she would have done it in that weirdly polite and distant way like oh I’m sorry I just forgot I have a thing but we all know it’s weird because you were planning to sleepover until a second ago, anyway, let me message you, it’s giving not ages later because you do actually want to talk to him but long enough that you’ve ran somewhere and had that initial trauma response not in front of him]

Edie: I’m sorry, for that, it was weird and mean and that’s not how I meant it

Liam: What did I do? I don’t understand

Edie: It isn’t you, you did everything right

Liam: Can’t’ve

Edie: I mean it, it’s me

Edie: this isn’t the first time this has happened, getting everything I want and then

Edie: my head and my body don’t match up

Liam: This is the first time mine matched up since I dunno when

Liam: where am I meant to put what you’re saying?

Edie: I want to explain

Edie: because this doesn’t have to fuck you up, shouldn’t

Liam: Explain then

Edie: Problem is I think the truth is worse

Edie: I wanted to stay, I wanted to be normal and to be able to let you know, how it was, how I feel, I can’t do it

Liam: I know how it was and you feel

Edie: No, not now, you think it was wrong, that I’ve ran away because of that

Liam: You ran for the age old reason, you’re afeared, what of I’m not claiming knowledge, except that it ain’t of us

Edie: No, it’s not

Edie: I’m glad you know that, that matters, not fucking you up too and any more than everything else has, matters to me

Liam: Matters where you’ve been and all’s what gone on, you’d of stayed, this were [whenever they kissed before]

Edie: I talked myself into something really, really stupid

Edie: and now I don’t know how to get out of it

Liam: I’ll get you out of it, don’t matter what it is

Edie: It’s a big thing

Liam: Nothing’s big enough to be a bother when it’s you s’for

Edie: You might change your mind

Liam: Try us

Edie: It’s my fault, all of it

Edie: even if I feel different now, you have to know that, I’m not a liar

Liam: Aye, I do know you’re not

Edie: I’ve done it before

Edie: I thought you’d notice, that you had

Liam: Notice how if you don’t tell us yourself? 

Edie: You know

Edie: it’d’ve been different if I had no clue

Liam: [making some kind of technology/computer analogy that I cannot that’s giving the equivalent of you’re not a used car gal how was I supposed to just know lol]

Edie: I weren’t scared, most girls are bricking it, aren’t they

Edie: and lads, I reckon but I know less about that

Liam: I reckoned you weren’t for same reasons as us

Edie: That is some of it

Edie: but I think I still would be if it was all of it

Liam: Right, I’m away in the head to miss half the story

Edie: No, no

Edie: it’s something you’d never guess, it’s too far out and then some to cross anyone’s mind

Liam: You after us guessing? Don’t seem this is a laugh, like

Edie: It might help me guess where your head is, calibrate my approach in getting you up to speed

Liam: Yours is as good as mine where my head’s the now

Liam: you left

Edie: I’m sorry

Edie: staying would have looked worse

Liam: I can’t keep up with a U-turn like that

Edie: I shouldn’t have made it sound like I expect you to, even want it

Edie: I should tell you, but wanting to do it is a fucking stretch when it feels like the brakes are cut and I left my stomach and my brain back miles ago

Liam: [some kind of away message type thing he’s set up to flash up for her and only her when he’s busy, giving I’ll walk away from the keyboard and you can just vent energy, we know what I’m saying, because that’ll make it slightly easier]

Edie: Fair as walking away

Edie: I guess there’s no shortcut, no TLDR, just, go for it

Edie: I did it with someone I shouldn’t have and someone who’ll get into the worst kind of trouble if anyone finds out, even telling you feels dangerous but it can’t carry on indefinitely, I can’t

Liam: You can’t use dangerous and keep their identity to yourself

Edie: How many people are off-limits, truly

Edie: I fucked up in the worst possible way

Liam: Talk, Eds

Liam: this needs spelling out, fucked if I’ll catch the wrong end of a desperate shite stick

Edie: You know I’ve always been obsessed with him

Edie: that it was too much, everyone sees that, it’s so embarrassing how obvious it all looks with the hindsight everyone will get 

Edie: but that’s my dad, you know, he’s meant to care, be there

Liam: He’s not meant to take being there that far

Edie: I told him things, things that I’ve never told anyone because they’re so shameful

Liam: Leverage he made full use of, Jesus wept

Edie: I made it sound sexy

Edie: even if it shouldn’t

Liam: He’s your da, should be impossible

Edie: You don’t know how far I took it

Edie: there was no limits

Liam: The limits are for him to put down, like his foot, he’s the grown one

Liam: I’d go before he’s wick as mine, not wrong as this

Edie: I should have all the power, I could ruin his life

Edie: but I just feel trapped

Liam: How long’s he been ruining yours?

Edie: In person, the first time anything happened was his birthday, last year

Liam: Last year

Liam: fucking hell

Edie: and I told him I’d stay with him forever and look after him but I can’t, I knew I couldn’t almost as soon as I said it but how do you just take something like this back?

Liam: I dunno that there’s taking any of it back and he’d of known the first time anything went on, before you saw him in person

Edie: but he’s my da, it’s not like I can just stop seeing him, can I?

Liam: He’ll be counting on that, has up to here

Edie: He’s given me loads of outs but I never take them, I can’t do it, I’m too weak

Liam: Laid loads of traps and taken every advantage of the weaknesses you’ve got for him

Edie: I’m so stupid

Liam: Nah, he manipulated you

Edie: If I was smarter and a better person, none of this could have happened

Liam: He timed it well, we both know why this happened

Edie: The haunting owed for me even suggesting that doesn’t bear thinking about

Liam: I said it, let her for the words I’ve to have myself

Liam: I weren’t about, I would’ve been and could’ve stopped this

Edie: You can’t take any blame

Liam: Least I can do

Edie: He wasn’t a replacement

Edie: it wasn’t like that

Liam: What he did to you don’t compare to nothing I would

Edie: You’re nothing alike

Edie: I mean that entirely in your favour

Liam: He’s a sort of his own, you know what I mean?

Edie: I know

Edie: I can hardly deny it now

Liam: You’re worth [the biggest number in the world possible for him to feasibly type]s of him

Liam: s’what it’s like

Edie: I wish I wasn’t as bad

Edie: so I could deserve your sweetness

Liam: Away to fuck

Edie: But I mean it

Edie: I’ll let you read it, the levels of depraved bullshit, that’s easier than telling you

Liam: Takes 2, you weren’t yourself, who died to excuse him his?

Edie: He’s a lot of issues

Edie: I know, nothing makes it right

Liam: Troubles he brings on himself, he’s got

Edie: That’s what I am

Liam: No you ain’t

Edie: He gave me life and I’ve ruined the both of ours

Liam: He gave you life and took your virginity

Liam: level of fucked I can’t bear to type it, but you need to read it

Edie: What am I going to do, Li

Liam: Come back to stay tonight and we’ll work that out

Edie: I don’t know how I’m meant to be around you now

Liam: We’re no different, he don’t get to change me and you

Liam: we’ve done it on our own, how we can face

Edie: I don’t want you to have to look at me different

Liam: I’m looking at you different from what we did and how I feel, not what he’s done

Edie: I would have told you before

Edie: but I was scared, that you’d change your mind because of it and I selfishly really, really wanted you to not

Liam: You don’t owe us, it happened to you and it’s up to you what you’re telling or no

Edie: I tell you everything

Edie: I did

Liam: I shut you out first and harder, I couldn’t do it

Edie: Of course you did, where would you even begin, how

Liam: Everything had to stop

Edie: I understand, I did then too

Liam: But it didn’t

Edie: Only us, as it turns out

Liam: I fucked up

Liam: safety in numbers and I left you alone

Edie: I left you alone

Edie: and more fucked up than anyone could dream of but I’m not trying to make it no competition

Edie: this isn’t your fault

Liam: Never competition and nothing I can do, for her and now you

Liam: I’m to just stand here like a spare part each time, but I won’t

Edie: No one alive knows more of what you did for her than me

Edie: and you’re going to be there for me too

Liam: Where’ve you hidden up?

Liam: [some guesses of where he thinks she is, unlike when Moses did not even look for her, we ALL remember]

Edie: [the anti mood that was but tell this boy where you are because not hiding from him you just had to leave right now immediately]

Liam: Do you have more to tell us before I come for you?

Edie: It’s hard to work out, what’s important and what ain’t about it

Edie: there’s time, right

Liam: We’ve all night, like

Edie: DJ would let us stay with him if your mammy won’t

Liam: My da would too, he don’t care what I’m doing or who with the now

Edie: You’re the best friend I’ve ever had, you know

Liam: You’re worth it, putting up with everything else to be here in the same time and place

Edie: Don’t make me cry

Liam: I’d stick it out through worse to know you

Edie: There’s nothing I’d not do for you, I mean that

Liam: No crying then, don’t

Edie: Okay, I’ll do my best

Liam: Still my birthday for [however long]

Edie: Don’t waste your wish, I can keep my shit together

Liam: I’ve had it and I didn’t, no worries

Edie: You can have one for each candle, those are my rules

Liam: Don’t make us say like this

Edie: You don’t have to say anything

Liam: I was looking to go for it in person first

Edie: I messed it up 

Edie: I’m not going to run away again

Liam: Not without us

Edie: Getting to your da’s would be easy

Liam: [give her those deets and plan it as if y’all are going rn immediately because it clearly is easy you just don’t see him often cos he’s a bit of a flop and more so since your sister got sick again etc etc]

Edie: He doesn’t know what to say anymore

Edie: not that it was ever his forte, let’s not lie

Liam: But he’s a house by the sea

Edie: We’ll go

Liam: With your 🦈

Edie: I think he’ll like the beach

Liam: Only the one way to find out

Edie: You want to too, not just for me

Edie: get out of here

Liam: I’ve nothing keeping us

Edie: It’s not like we can never come back, right

Liam: [however far away like it’s just that simple because we can pretend rn that it is]

Edie: Could run it in [an ambitious but more sensible estimate]

Edie: [another one that’s ridiculously fast] if I’m scared

Liam: You won’t have no reason no more

Edie: I trust you

Edie: I don’t trust him anymore, maybe I never should have, sure but

Edie: it’s gone

Liam: He’s your da, you weren’t meant to have cause against trusting him

Edie: Arguable how good he ever was, according to most though

Edie: you didn’t get like it over yours, Una didn’t

Edie: why did I need him that much?

Liam: Suited him to make you reckon you did

Edie: but it was real

Liam: My nightmares feel real

Edie: I can’t explain

Liam: You don’t need to

Edie: I do

Liam: You don’t tonight

Edie: Don’t let me take it back

Liam: I swear

Edie: Because I will

Liam: Without us giving you chance to, you can’t

Edie: It’s over now, isn’t it

Liam: That it is

Edie: I wish I knew how to feel

Liam: I could tell you how to, I would

Edie: I know

Edie: if only it was that simple but I know you’ve not got the grip on your own shit, never mind mine

Liam: I’ve a grip on you, that’ll do

Edie: It doesn’t change how you feel about it, does it?

Liam: Nah

Edie: Swear

Edie: because you can tell me otherwise

Liam: He wishes he had that power over me or you

Liam: but he don’t

Edie: That was real, and it’s own thing, I’d never lie about it

Liam: I know

Edie: I didn’t mean to ruin your first time too

Liam: Weren’t you who ruined anything, still him both times

Edie: Don’t be put off for life

Edie: the female population of Dublin would be really pissed off with us for that

Liam: You’re the girl for us, rest to be put off themselves wherever we head

Edie: A full-time occupation for us both, that

Liam: I’m no chicken to take it on

Edie: You’re worth it

Edie: and getting a real one, packing school in, if that’s what works for us

Liam: We’ll both grasp the nettle, as the saying goes, like

Edie: What would I do without you, as an actual question and not just some saying

Liam: Some hypothetical question

Liam: you’ve got us no matter what

Edie: Then everything will be okay, no matter what

Liam: Long as I can make my body move I’ll have it work to help you out

Edie: I won’t let you stay dark, long as I’m able to do anything, that’s what I’ll be doing

Liam: I’ll be near you as I am this min, if not nearer

Liam: [and some stalkery style content the likes of when he was filming her through the window when she was setting the bouncy castle up that she did not know he was filming because it’s a tragedy she did not and as we said then she’d love that, to show his approach to wherever she’s been hiding rn]

Edie: You know I think you’re the coolest 😍

Edie: I can’t stand that I left

Liam: [send her some more footage of her that’s interspersed with close ups of his actual hearteyes that become more insane close ups obvs as he gets closer to her and the footage of her is likewise more stalkery looking for the same reason because like how close can you get without her just seeing you lol god bless]

Edie: [enjoy this game lads because he’s obviously good at it and you’re into it]

Edie: Is it weird how comforting I find it knowing you’re watching me? Among other things but never creepy

Liam: [how he so toll but so sneaky, impressive af tbh]

Liam: You weren’t safe but you know the now you are, there’d be wee comfort in that

Edie: There’s never any fault in your logic, I can trust it more than mine

Liam: I’ll not let you down

Edie: You don’t need to promise, your track record speaks for itself

Liam: [reveal yourself from whatever insanely close by place you’ve been filming her from without her knowing because that track record also does, the way that would be TERRIFYING if she was anyone else because just lurking and then suddenly appearing really jarringly literally right next to her, immediately touching her arm where her tattoo is, obvs]

Edie: [like you’re still going to jump because that will always be the initial reaction but the way you are delighted by it/his appearance the second you can fight that involuntary response is so real; obviously right now you have a slight hesitance about you because you do feel bad for running like you did, whether you could help it or not as the case was, not to mention the elephant in the room and being sure he/everyone is going to be repulsed by it/you after finding out, even if he doesn’t mean to be, so we are here searching him for that reaction even though we don’t want to see it obvs, still reaching for his hand in the same gesture though]

Liam: [we all know she couldn’t help it under the circumstances and hence he isn’t holding that against her however dramatic and confusing as it was before he had the full tea and now that he has it god knows how he feels because haven’t even begun to process that incest reveal and he literally won’t until way after this murder has been committed cos cannot even, lord knows where they are and the trouble he could get in/if it’s even dark enough for this but he will be lighting a fire for them to sit around rn immediately for something practical to do/more comfort to provide for her and somewhere to express some of his emotion because that bitch, excuse us]

Edie: [truly god knows where you are but definitely giving somewhere secluded enough that we should be okay and emboldened because the point was needing to be alone and that means fully alone, like no one can see me and I’m sure you know all the good spots as a duo so not unbelievable to say; anyway, you letting him do this without helping because very aware it’s his thing and you don’t need to, happy to watch and get hypnotised by it for a moment so you can both have that time to at least not be in an active sheer panic here ‘I’ve already forgotten, how much I’ve said and what’s still just in my head and on my phone’ saying this quietly but very matter of factly and unemotionally, because you truly have, beyond knowing you told him the headline of it all, throwing something into this fire as if getting his attention, doing a look up at him briefly to make eye contact before looking back at the flames]

Liam: [we’ll allow it, y’all both need this fire to exist rn almost as it’s own character for your own reasons, first and foremost it will calm you both cos watching flames do have that effect, y’all are welcome ‘you never said much’ as matter of factly simply because she really hasn’t yet, with no demands for her to or any kind of shade attached to it, but we’re all aware of his unemotional and logical want to get as much in writing as possible for evidence knowing what he’s about to do, maintaining eye contact and continuing to look at her long after she’s looking back at the flames which says EVERYTHING cos this boy be obsessed with fire and normally wouldn’t tear his gaze away from it]

Edie: [nodding because you suspected as much, eyes darting back to him and doing a microscopic double take to find him still looking at you, smiling but your eyes are so sad ‘I’ve ruined your birthday’ as a statement because mad at the timing we have chosen but there’d never be a right time to drop this bombshell and we know it, patting the ground next to us, asking him to sit down]

Liam: [looking back at her in a way that wordlessly conveys so many things but most importantly he didn’t want a bday anyway but she gave him a slay one before this reveal which he can only hard agree there is no right time for because there just isn’t but he’d rather know so that now he can do something about it, sitting down next to her where she has gestured ‘he’d ruined your life’ poking this fire with a stick or something which would seem casual to anyone else but is actually showing a glimpse of how upset he is about it cos he’s not and can’t be sat still]

Edie: [going to lean your head on his shoulder, like this is a cosy, comfortable vibe but it isn’t and almost as soon as your hair has brushed against him, you’re sitting back upright and leaving space between you still ‘I did it, you need to understand how much of it was me if you’re to-’ cutting yourself off with a sigh because can’t bear feeling like we’re running calling victim (even though you absolutely are a victim) when it’s not been that cut and dry a case and you have ALL the guilt about it ‘he never forced me to, like, is my point, sick as it may be’]

Liam: [giving her his phone as a swap so she isn’t sat there with nothing to do and gesturing for hers because she told him earlier to read it and that’s an easier way of understanding the vibe than making her say and relive it all, not that it’ll be any nicer to have to sit there while this boy reads everything but you know, clenching his jaw because wants to say that she’s a kid and has been coerced regardless of how much she thinks was her idea etc but keeping his mouth shut cos he knows she’ll just deny that rn]

Edie: [rubbing your own jaw like you want to his but aren’t going to in this moment ‘don’t be mad at me’ under your breath as you take his phone, opening it though you have no intention nor ability to be looking at anything ‘we don’t have to do this’ like we can stop right now and pretend I never said anything which is not true but you know]

Liam: [sadly you do have to do this even though he’d also love nothing more than to not read/look at all of this I’m sure, have fun with that boy because you are going to however long that takes, only doing a lil shake of his head to acknowledge that he isn’t/couldn’t be mad but it’s giving the same energy of her speaking under her breath so she might not see it, at some point when he gets to a bit of her dad being especially gross, taking her hand and just keeping hold of it until he’s done reading, would seem so casual once again but simply isn’t and is a nice throwback to their bouncy castle hookup antics]

Edie: [enjoy not running away again even though everything in you wants to because this is tortuous and you can’t stand how uncomfortable this is for him and you really want to snatch that phone away and be like nope I changed my mind but it is too late now, and the part of you that can still be rational knows it’s better to sit in this painful and gross feeling than carry on how you have been but it’s just hard, jogging your legs drastically, excuse the way your hand is being jiggled by this and how sweaty our palm is in yours, making a noise somewhere between a groan and a whimper]

Liam: [catch him not letting go no matter what she does because it’s important and they both need it, y’all are in this together now that he knows and there’s no better way to illustrate that, squeezing her hand when she makes the noise but otherwise continuing to read without any further acknowledgement cos gotta get through it and if he stops reading he won’t start back up again, finally when he is actually done and her phone has been dropped onto his leg (yet again casual but not at all casual) saying ‘sea between you’s no distance enough’ with emphasis on between because going to visit his dad BY the sea in a town that’s literally only an hour away by the dart isn’t gonna cut it, which he lowkey already knew because he knows what Moses is like but now he knows it without a shadow of a doubt, that man isn’t gonna just let them run off together, they’d need oceans and oceans of separation at least]

Edie: [‘I never saw him when he was [and then listing places he has worked that are the same distance away as his dad’s and even closer]’ with a shrug as if anything is casual here when we all know otherwise ‘if I tell him it’s done, he’ll leave himself’ you’re really just hoping that that’s true at this point]

Liam: [‘you can’t mean to see him again’ like genuinely can’t believe you would even consider it never mind to have a break up convo where all bets are off and he could do anything cos he’ll blatantly be LIVID]

Edie: [shake your head like no, because you do not even want to contemplate seeing him right now, never mind trying to do this in person ever ‘s’easier to get it as a text, easier to read, yeah?’ gesturing at your phone in his lap]

Liam: [he was LOOKING at her arm when her tattoo is because we all know how fuming Moses will be about that, it’s essentially a break up gesture itself but then moving his gaze back down to the phone he’s let drop, just knowing nothing is that simple because that man would find a way to force an IRL confrontation he’s just that bitch even and especially when the stakes are this high]

Edie: [‘he’s not going to do anything when anyone else is there’ covering your tattoo with your hand self-consciously for a moment, rubbing the skin like you’re freezing though it’s summer and there’s a fire so you’re absolutely not, like all you have to do is never be alone again and it’s FINE]

Liam: [getting this fire going more as if she is freezing but really he’s thinking because you can’t just be saying it’s fine I’ll kill him like that’s super casual ‘and when he’s got you on your own’ not finishing that sentence because can’t bear to knowing what would happen so pretending we’re phrasing it more like a question here]

Edie: [‘he won’t’ kicking something else into this fire with all the confidence you don’t have truly but want to ‘you said, we’ll stick together’]

Liam: [‘right you are’ with the ominous sort of confidence he has atm knowing that Moses won’t because of what he has decided to do even though he has yet to form a real plan, putting her phone in his pocket as the beginning of it because clearly has gotten as far as thinking he needs it to trap her dad/she shouldn’t have it whatever happens next but it’s that vague for now]

Edie: [‘Liam’ as you are eyeing him do this, not in a stop it tone but a tell me what you’re thinking sort because you don’t want to be left out of this]

Liam: [name drop some films that have the right energy and murder as plot device/revenge tactic, we know what I’m saying, as an echo to when she was name dropping places nearby a moment ago, with the same kind of it’s all fine and casual tone and vibe, but the eye contact is intense because everything is being said wordlessly here, that’s how they do their best communicating]

Edie: [your eyes widening from their normal resting state being the only reaction you give at first, taking a beat to process this and formulate your own reply ‘we’ll get caught’ because no world in which you won’t, leaving it up to interpretation of how he takes this, as a no we’re not or a have you realised and fully appreciated this etc]

Liam: [‘I’ll be lifted, aye’ as he’s looking at the fire thinking about how it can destroy a lot of evidence but not everything, a shrug ‘but what have I to lose’ a beat while he looks back at her ‘you, like, what’ll happen if I do nothing’ because Moses has already kept y’all apart as things stand and if he knows that the romantic vibes have escalated then lord knows what he’ll do, clearly Liam is anticipating never seeing her again, whether that’s because her father will steal her fully or do something to hurt her isn’t the point]

Edie: [getting up to reach him, the urgency and !! like the police are about to show up right now, grabbing both his hands and SQUEEZING them so hard, shaking your head in disbelief, your mouth moving to make words but nothing but sounds coming out until you have to hug him as hard as you’re squeezing his hands, burying your face in his chest ‘I can’t let you do that for me’]

Liam: [LOOKING at her with the same urgency and !! as if that’ll stop her head in its tracks from shaking or turn it into a nod yes, hugging her back as hard, obvs, pushing her head even further into his chest so she can feel that his heartbeat is steady because his mind is made up and he’s not scared or freaking out (which is a red flag sir and how we can tell you’re a child who doesn’t fully understand consequences or the extent of what you’re agreeing to do but hey ho) ‘you said, you’re trapped, running’d never free you how this would’ because we GOTTA do this, soz not soz and won’t let her stop him]

Edie: [we know your own heart is going like the clappers and you literally find this so relaxing so there’s no way we’re not clamping our ear to your chest and listening to how calm and rhythmic his heart is right now, breathing out shakily ‘we’ll do it together’ in a small voice]

Liam: [‘you’ve a ma still here, brothers and sisters, I’ll get it  done for you’ because as far as he’s concerned his mum is gone too because she’s fully in her grief and Jesus era and his dad is a flop so that’s that whereas other than Moses she has a decent fam who would miss her and she would miss, we can’t talk about his voice when he says sisters, bye]

Edie: [‘you’ve got me’ so fiercely, looking up into his face because he needs to know you mean it and you need to see that he believes it ‘I will never leave you alone, no matter what’ finally reaching up and rubbing his jaw, being so gentle given how !! your entire demeanour is right now]

Liam: [a nod that’s like yeah I do and I’m making sure I always will by doing this because in this moment it feels that dramatic and as if Moses is capable of literally anything with everything he’s read so fresh in his mind (and given that Ronan takes Junior away not an unrealistic fear either), it’s the HEARTEYES for me though that are just screaming ILY as she touches him] 

Edie: [‘you can’t stop me doing it with you or running away with you and never looking back or doing something just as bad so you don’t have to go to prison alone’ burbling slightly but the sentiment is the realest, putting both your hands on his shoulders and swaying a little from all the !! because we’re so serious]

Liam: [resting his chin on the top of her head because height diff 5ever and we know we can’t technically stop her from doing any of those things but it is an adorable and simple gesture of stop because obvs don’t want her doing any of those things, but he’s decided that if she must then letting her help but not get caught is the best option here so he’s thinking that through like okay]

Edie: [making a faux grumpy sound about being squished into submission/back into his chest with his giant size but you aren’t grumpy about it truly, how could you be, wrapping your arms around him and nuzzling in ‘don’t you trust me? We know way more than any garda, much more than him’ saying the last bit quieter because don’t want to deal with the reality of the situation quite yet]

Liam: [‘it ain’t I don’t’ because it isn’t we all know he trusts her with his life, he just doesn’t wanna put her through this when she’s frankly been through enough and as far as he’s concerned with the plotting he’s done so far there’s no need for her to have a role in it ‘I’ve already your phone, where’s the need for you to-’ stopping so we don’t say the rest because the reality doesn’t need to be bluntly stated]

Edie: [‘it’s not fair you get in all the trouble when it should be me’ because even if we were going to cop to it not being all our fault, it’s still not his remotely in any world, still, letting there be a pause before you add ‘what do you want me to do?’ because that’s what matters to us]

Liam: [‘plenty about this weren’t, and won’t be, fair to you, you’ve your own trouble to come still’ because he knows the aftermath will be hell for her in a way it won’t for him cos that’s her father and she’ll still grieve despite everything and he knows firsthand how much that sucks never mind everything else they aren’t thinking about yet, wrapping his arms around her so tightly he accidentally lifts her up slightly with the force of it and how he’s pulling her to him, making sure her feet are back on the ground before he answers her question, looking down at her ‘save us surveillance we’ve not time for’ because as we said in the other convo we tried, she knows Moses routine whereas this boy would have to stalk him to find out and he wants to do this ASAP to avoid her having any contact with her dad that’s the entire point of this plan]

[punkscowardschampions]

#tell me what you're thinking boo like these are just random images but do you see the vision orrrr

[punkscowardschampions]

Edam Pt.1

Edie: h4ppY 81r7HD4y 70 J00 H4ppy 81r7Hd4y 70 j00 H4pPy 81r7hd4y d34r L14M H4PpY 81r7hd4y 70 j00

Edie: You’ve got a real song incoming but I was thinking we could drop a video for it at the same time if you like it enough to be inspired so 🤐 for now

Edie: Please don’t be busy, all the stuff I’m carrying over is super heavy!

Liam: [me just having to rudely ignore this because he isn’t acknowledging it’s his birthday, at least we know he’s ignoring Django too and has literally made his poor mother go to work so you aren’t alone with this silent treatment hun]

Edie: [at least you have very valid reasons for this and they are reasons we’re well aware of too so it’s not being taken as a personal attack, even if y’all have drifted; god bless you just showing up anyway girl, with I imagine one of those child trailer things behind you full of stuff that is essential for birthday vibes]

Liam: [she is the cutest and we love her, and thank god for it being august so there’s the probability of him having his bedroom window open so she can come through because he’d be locked in and busy doing whatever computer shit he is as if it’s any other day with headphones on if you knocked, impeccable vibes from the off, don’t worry we won’t let anyone steal your trailer when you gotta sneak in]

Edie: [you can climb in his as I’ve already said he does yours, probably jumpscare him hardcore but needs must I’m afraid, got to be cute and bring you in your balloon as if we just winnie floated in your window here]

Liam: [no feelings or not you will be jumpscared by her sudden appearance because engrossed in whatever you were doing so that’s just unavoidable, take the helium from said balloon so your voice is squeaky and less harsh than it would otherwise be when you ask her ‘what you doing here?’ also so the balloon is lowkey a lil bit dead RIP for the immediate party pooper vibes lol]

Edie: [‘it’s your birthday’ as the answer like where else would I be, sir, batting this slightly deflated balloon against his wardrobe rather than address anything awkward yet]

Liam: [‘she didn’t get to have hers’ so matter of fact and devoid of emotion that he could be discussing the weather rather than us rudely killing off his sister so close to her bday and him therefore being like no thank you I don’t want it]

Edie: [‘no her 16th’ said like you’ve still got 2 birthdays of your own to have, gently and not fully seriously like no you MUST because he does not have to ‘it’s just me’ gesturing behind herself like a party isn’t going to follow me through the window I swear]

Liam: [hitting the balloon, harder than she did but not hard like !! looking behind it as it moves like it’s alive or there will be a queue of peeps waiting to make him celebrate or something, following her gaze behind her and likewise moving to look out of this window, closing it against an invisible or imaginary party but when he does, seeing the stuff she had to leave outside so going to open his front door and retrieve that, shouting ‘you and…?’ as he goes like excuse you what have you brought because it looks like a lot and not at all lowkey]

Edie: [‘just the essentials’ as you’re following him down the stairs because it does look like a lot but you knew he’d have nothing/not be celebrating so you had to bring all the essentials, food, games, balloons etc etc, we know the vibes]

Liam: [just dig through all that stuff for a sec and mess with it all, I fully imagine you trying to make a balloon animal type of thing but so that it’s deliberately weird as is y’all’s vibe, so hand her that when you have like this creature is now essential] 

Edie: [trying to attach a party hat to this creatures head, giving up and then attempting to reach his head to put it on him, adorable mental image because you will never be able to girl, not even on your tiptoes]

Liam: [have a lil playfight whereby he holds this party hat even higher out of her reach by stretching up while she’s trying to retrieve it because the flirty vibes are always there and will be added to when he eventually puts the party hat on her head, complete with string under her chin and all, so much touching and so in her grill]

Edie: [doing such a pouty face like how dare you make me look such a fool, before doing a massive OTT grin like actually, best day ever, duh, using it like a unicorn horn to stab him wherever your head reaches on his body, not hard enough to crush the hat though]

Liam: [not reacting to her charge unlike the jumpscare earlier when he couldn’t help but, except he very much is because he will be touching her face to wipe away some glitter that this party hat has already transferred there in a way that is again too flirty]

Edie: [doing the kind of breath out that’s almost a laugh but you’re really just smiling whilst you do a !! breath to cover that it is a !! breath, there’s no actual sound here, swiping your own fingers across where his just were, like you’re making sure your face isn’t caked in something but you’re just memorising the feeling, looking down to reach in your pocket and get him this pick n mix out like you’ve just remembered ‘breakfast’ because clearly still the AM and what better birthday child vibes]

Liam: [holding up his finger to show her that it’s just glitter and she wasn’t covered in shit randomly, again getting needlessly in her grill with said finger like she won’t see this spec of glitter otherwise or as if you’re gonna wipe it somewhere else but not doing that obvs because you really wanna keep it on your finger whether you’re aware of that or not, hence literally taking these sweets with his other hand and eating some, doing a grin when they are all chewed in his mouth and all over his teeth because only doing it to be gross ofc not because we’re happy nope, I’d like it noted that he’s eating like most of these in a oner with that teenage boy always starving energy but he’s keeping her faves and handing the bag back to her with those in]

Edie: [having to follow his finger like you’re hypnotised, swaying your head closer to it dramatically with BIG eyes, just to cover how long you were simply just LOOKING at it before this carry-on, shaking your head and loling at him with these sweets as you’re walking over to your trailer to retrieve a pile of his favourite films, which you could have got once you got here but you took the ones from your collection because of course you have them too, going over to turn on his TV and set up casually because done this many times before obvs, rolling up this pick n mix bag to save these sweets and put them back in your pocket]

Liam: [go and make yourself comfy you giant boy, I imagine you fully lying on the floor because you strike me as that kind of bitch rather than someone who’d opt for the sofa, picking one of said films and pushing it towards her with one of his long ass limbs like this one]

Edie: [floor bitches unite, I feel seen lol, put this film on gal, get out any other snacks you brought him before getting yourself some of his mum’s scatter cushions to lay your head on on the floor next to him, blatantly watching him more than this film rn, rubbing some glitter off your party hat and brushing it across his cheek]

Liam: [me being evil and saying he does some kind of tic when she touches him, idk enough about this to say what it could be but the point is that it’s not subtle and it’s new from when she saw him last like a month ago, because why not bring that in from the other convo we started, soz lads]

Edie: [not saying you dramatically turn towards the TV or anything but as casually but quickly as you can shifting your focus there so you’re not staring because you don’t want to be making him uncomfortable, even though you know it’s a new tic because you’d be familiar with the others he had]

Liam: [tell her about the first time you did this new one and if an old one has gone or it’s just a lovely bonus, again with the tone that he could be talking about anything he doesn’t care about rather than his concerning mental health]

Edie: [‘two big milestones, one tic’ a half shrug like you’re doing okay because matching this energy of not being phased as much as we can because not only is it her death anniversary, it’s her bday too so that’s fun, going to hold his hand though because you never pretend you don’t care at all when you do and you want him to know even if he doesn’t appreciate it/acts like he doesn’t]

Liam: [‘aye’ because yep such fun for y’all lately and sir you don’t even know the half of it yet you’ve got a big storm coming when we get to this incest reveal, looking down at their hands for a beat with all the drama that his words never give, SQUEEZING hers so hard for a sec you’d think that could be a tic too but we’ve just gotta because she’s here and he hasn’t seen her since that terrible time]

Edie: [‘I’m sorry I haven’t been around since’ like you can read his mind because you are sorry and have wanted to be here but could not for reasons he doesn’t yet know but soon, shifting your arm slightly to not be laying on it because I’m saying you’ve already given yourself the L tattoo hence yours was covered in the pic]

Liam: [‘what happens’ because I know from experience that by a year on peeps expect you to be over your grief and the age he is and most of his friends therefore are, they’d be bored by it even quicker, ouch and so rude of him to lump you in with those kinds of people but he doesn’t know yet so it makes sense that’s what he thinks is going on, letting go of her hand and rolling away as if he’s doing it to get comfy/mess around and not for distance]

Edie: [‘no’ said matter of factly like no, that isn’t what’s happened with me because you knew and cared about Una too and still do, your sadness at being lumped in with everyone else only slightly betrayed by your quiet tone]

Liam: [roll back towards her as if it’s just a playful thing and you’re gonna roll back away in a sec and none of this means anything but you heard the sadness is her tone is what actually happened so you gotta, WATCHING her instead of this film]

Edie: [‘don’t be mad at me, I want to be a better friend’ all the emphasis on wanting to, not saying you can be because not about to make promises we can’t keep]

Liam: [‘you’re here the now’ because she is and that’s not nothing, it clearly means something to him or he wouldn’t be lying here entertaining it he’d have told her to leave, looking at his finger to see if the glitter is still there, touching his cheek where she wiped glitter on him so that they’re mixed together because that’s adorable and peak romance of you in a way you didn’t even intend]

Edie: [‘and we can do whatever you want, really’ gesturing at all the shit you brought like disregard if you wanna or use as you please, putting your finger to his like ET like you’re making a glitter blood pact here because you also want some now]

Liam: [the way I just know that the ET gesture is giving y’all one of those random lil electric shocks (full shade it’s probs from his mum’s cheap carpet soz irish Emma) but they are SO into it, hence him doing a lil but v genuine smile about it]

Edie: [rubbing your little feet along this carpet trying to do it again and make his arm hairs stand up on end, just looking like a cricket lowkey lol]

Liam: [1000% saying ‘look like a cricket so you do’ but so affectionately because being hit by a wave of ILY and I’ve missed you that’s as strong as he’s capable of feeling, basically giving hearteyes about it over here]

Edie: [telling him some weird fact about crickets that you just know because that sort of girl and bugs are always weird but you’re smiling to yourself so hard because he’s being affectionate and you can’t deal]

Liam: [likewise rolling even closer to her to show her some weird online video about a cricket (that she’s probably seen before because she’s that girl but shh it’s an excuse to be close) on his phone because he’s that sort of bear, practically pulling her into him under the guise that he needs to so she can see, and we all know it’s turning into some kind of weird video spiralling sesh rabbit hole moment so that y’all can stay like this for longer despite not having paused the film because you’re both adhd as hell]

Edie: [my boo says I could NEVER but y’all are having the best of times, even more so because you get to shamelessly snuggle into him because nothing worse than scrolling and looking at a screen whilst in an uncomfortable position, right lads]

Liam: [we love it for you, we also love that eventually he’ll get bored of this rabbit hole and just start filming her because he’s also that sort of bear, zooming in as much as his phone will let him to her cheek to see if there’s any trace of the glitter and then just zooming in on her eyes because they are STUNNING and her mouth because duh, that’s obvious ‘you’ve kept this hair colour ages’ as he also zooms in on a strand of it because I’m sure before Moses she was changing up the colours whenever she was bored]

Edie: [hiding your face behind your hair and pulling silly faces at him/this phone camera to hide that you’ve gone red ‘so you hate it then’ with a laugh like excuse me because sound more fed up lol ‘my dad likes it’ tacked on the end there because do not want to be talking about him really]

Liam: [‘nah but [and going on to rank all the hair colours she has ever had nbd, we all know this black is quite low down because he isn’t Moses and he likes the crazier and cooler colours she’s done but not the lowest because taking the opportunity to remind her of any hair fails when she started like lol lol], I liked [and telling her his absolute fave which I won’t commit us to but Winnie says remember he said this girl cos she has to revert back to said fave at a feelsy opportunity whether that’s the first time she visits him in prison or they see each other in court or when he gets out of prison even, that’s for my boo to decide which moment she wants to get us with, could be when they get married if we did that, who can say]’ blowing up another balloon of the sort he used to make the balloon creature with because clearly she brought a bag of them non helium lads and rubbing it on her head to make her hair stand up]

Edie: [just here listening to this boy and absolutely remembering his fave for a later date, we are that girl and we all know it, getting your own balloon so y’all can have a balloon fight/then be playing the game where you have to keep it from hitting the floor, just vibing, like you don’t lowkey wanna go dye your hair rn immediately about it but you cannot, you can get warm enough to take off whatever layer you got on so he can see this tat you’ve done in honour of his bday] 

Liam: [mhmm we all know she’s that bitch hence it had to be put out there for a later date and yes they absolutely gotta play that and cause carnage like my brother did as a kid every single time there was a balloon anywhere in the vicinity because he was obsessed lol, RIP to irish Emma’s living room because this giant will be climbing all over furniture and all sorts to stop this balloon hitting the floor but it will be cinematic how quickly it will when he notices that tat like !! not you rubbing her arm to see if it comes off haha and when it does not LOOKING at her like omg]

Edie: [soz ma’am we are commandeering your house rn, I’m sure it’ll be vaguely back together by the time you get home, and you’d just be pleased he’s doing something for his bday lbr; ‘are you trying to rub it off?’ with a half lol because imagine if he was that fuming about it, awkward, moving your arm around so he can see it in different light, shrugging like it’s nbd and isn’t a declaration of how important he is to you or anything]

Liam: [‘why’d you not go, I’ve done a tat for you?’ as if she should have announced this as she was climbing through his bedroom window because a bitch needs to know ASAP and same tbf Liam I too would be like excuse you keeping me waiting for that reveal, still holding onto her arm as she moves it around when you could just let go but nope he isn’t]

Edie: [‘you was ignoring my messages, had to warm you up a bit’ we’re joking but also not because very intense opener even though you are and we know it, have just been looking down at our arm this entire time because we can feel your eyes on us, finally looking up to meet his gaze]

Liam: [the EYE CONTACT sis, very intense doesn’t even cover it, LOOKING at her so hard he doesn’t even realise that he’s gone from covering this delicate little tattoo with his whole hand with how !! he was holding onto her arm to lightly tracing over it, ofc with the ET glitter finger, it has to be]

Edie: [stopping breathing with a SHARP intake of breath honey, as if he’s just started grabbing your arm now and isn’t actually being gentler because it hits different]

Liam: [trying to read her mind with his STARE because he’s non verbally asking her what other secrets she has rn, oh honey don’t you aren’t ready for those yet my love, and she’d know that’s what he’s thinking about so that beat is gonna feel like FOREVER, only just finally letting go of her arm then, not at all nbd ‘where’s mine?’ said like excuse you it’s MY birthday I should be the one getting a cool tattoo here]

Edie: [ah the urge to tell him so he understands why you’ve been distant and that it’s not him or you not giving a fuck but also the opposite urge to have him never know this shameful secret, spinning away from him real fast as soon as he’s let go to get out the stick n poke shit you’ve obviously brought ‘what do you want?’ over your shoulder as you’re busying yourself setting up]

Liam: [wait until she is all set up and has no reasonable excuse not to look at you again before you nod to her arm as a way of saying that you want what she has obviously because y’all don’t need words to communicate, we all know she already knows what he’s thinking and the asking was purely just a formality]

Edie: [‘I’d not be offended’ because not the mood to force you into it but of course we are buzzing that you want to match our energy and are heart eyes as we’re looking him over deciding where to do it, taking his hand that you held earlier and holding it again as a ? because bold choice to not put it somewhere hideable, either of y’all, love that] 

Liam: [getting comfy so it’s super clear that he isn’t being forced into this and it couldn’t be more chill and nbd despite the fact it isn’t and y’all are both !! and hearteyes because he likewise loves that he can’t hide it there because the energy is we don’t want to, soz again to his mum but that’s your initial too so how mad can you be lol jk, looking down at her hand more than his because handhold but smiling his consent at her when he looks back up]

Edie: [pretending it’s for Irish Emma and she’s like do you think I was born yesterday lol, soz we have to do it girl but not soz at all, we have tattoo trauma to work through because your dad had two for you and you just had to have your first one be about Liam, not him, we know what we’re saying and doing even if you did not realise completely the significance as you did it, making a big fuss of being sterile and all that good stuff purely so it takes longer tbh because it’s literally like writing the letter so it won’t take a second to do it and you wanna make the moment last]

Liam: [mhmm it’s so important and that is why I’m gonna need him to get at least another tattoo when he’s in prison/gets out so he has as many as her dad that are about her if not ideally 3 so it’s more, maybe one when you’re in and one when you get out, that’d be nice, idk yet what they’ll be but we love to see it, gotta erase Moses as much as is possible thank you, but for now, the song and dance she is making over this first tattoo he is making over filming every second of it because his way to prolong the moment]

Edie: [you should be used to it because that’s y’alls vibe but you never are so you’re always adorably flustered and shy unless you’re in character to film something specific for a project because you can do that but when it’s just you being you you are 😳 at least you have slow-mo and really good zoom ‘cos you’re in the future and you can film this needle going in in that level of scary detail, however small the tat]

Liam: [this boy genuinely conflicted over whether to film her face as she’s doing it or the tattoo itself more because the girls are in love but you have all the gear so I imagine that you’re literally filming her face on your phone and this tattoo in graphic detail on a camera you’ve left lying around at some point so it’s conveniently in reach, or vice versa, the point is, he’s doing the MOST to capture every aspect of this moment]

Edie: [and you absolutely must, it’s fine and no one is !! here nope, not fighting the urge to write your whole name and just keep going honestly because too many feelings, me like put the needle down babe, walk away lol, do stop though, immediately asking him ‘tell me what it felt like’ because a thing you’d have done since the grief period because not a robot and can literally feel even if only physical sensations]

Liam: [truly, we’re all here screaming while Liam is sat there being a robot except not really because he’s as !! too it’s just less obvious, gonna say he compares it to a mem of them going camping and him getting stung/bitten by some kind of bug whether that’s more recent or childhood because that’s a fun and them kind of comparison to make and that he also compares her to a cricket again because simply must because they bite but it isn’t strong enough to puncture human skin but appaz you can still get an infection because they carry e.coli on their bodies and salmonella like lol lol so glad you  don’t bite but don’t give me an infection please, flirty vibes 5eva]

Edie: [the mock offence like how dare you ‘after I did that all by the book’ because didn’t just come at you with some ink and a dirty blade, boy, but now we’re launching ourself at you like we are going to cover you in germs lol lol indeed]

Liam: [it’s the playfight for me because he can just pick her up and throw her onto the sofa from whatever distance like my brother doing wrestling moves on baby Junie except not at all because I was fighting for my life and this is flirting your honour ‘by the book, best eat’ because you are meant to have a meal before a tattoo and it’s a shameless excuse to pull her back up immediately and drag her to the kitchen after a second of LOOMING over her being !! where we all know he would’ve kissed her otherwise, go and be domestic together and make something whether it’s his fave full irish breakfast from the OG or some other kind of fave, I personally vote for that because it’ll take a while and keep y’all occupied especially because his adhd ass will keep getting distracted looking at both of their tats shamelessly IRL and watching the footage he shot on a loop, with no fucks given if he’s in the middle of something and nearly burns his poor mother’s kitchen down]

Edie: [you’re both such chaotic yet wholesome energy, I know this food is going to get done at all different times so you’re just going to stand in the kitchen eating like bacon straight from the pan and then maybe a sausage sarnie and something else like feral hogs because there are no thoughts to timing here lol and good for you, be here also playing a game of seeing what he can get out of the tall cupboards for you, asking for the most ridiculous things you don’t need just ‘cos it amuses you]

Liam: [you’re so right boo that’s EXACTLY the vibe and I absolutely stan it for you both, a lovely time is being had, I also love that after like idk the 5th thing she’s asked him for that they don’t need he will pick her up and they will be going around every tall cupboard in this kitchen literally taking out everything and leaving it scattered about and the cupboard doors open like they are living the poltergeist cliche, just because it’ll amuse them to then pretend and do all that fake OTT kinda content taking the piss out of people’s hauntings and doing posts to trick peeps on certain reddit boards/tiktok or wherever into thinking they are being too, we know the vibes, all because he just wanted to pick her up lol] 

Edie: [the elaborate scheme, my boo says but we simply must and you would be having the best time even if you weren’t DYING about him picking you up like you’re tiny, which you absolutely would be even if you’re trying not to let it be known because two bros chilling in a hot tub]

Liam: [seriously the way this is the most he has EVER touched her is not subtle, even whenever they kissed pre grief cockblock he wouldn’t have been this touchy feelsy this often and this much so it’s really telling of how much he’s missed her and where his head is regarding the distance between them thanks to Moses, like, the boy is screaming in his own way sis, not to mention agreeing to that tattoo in a heartbeat/literally suggesting it]

Edie: [mhmm, and that’s not going unnoticed, how could it, we just don’t want to/can’t be the one that levels anything up because we believe and accept when you said you don’t feel things now, so the energy is very much not pushing against that, even if you’re like are there vibes right now orrrr]

Liam: [the vibes are impeccable, clean up with the same chaotic wholesome energy you cooked with which is finding things you’ve forgotten when you thought you’d finished washing up, putting things away in totally different places to where they were/in a kind of tetris that’ll cause an avalanche upon your poor mother when she opens a cupboard etc etc, none of it to be dicks you genuinely don’t realise and think you’re doing nice things here lads and then ask her ‘what’re we at the now?’ translation, what do you wanna/are we doing now? as you sit her on a kitchen counter, after having picked her up again to put some tall cupboard things away duh, to look at her like ?]

Edie: [‘it’s your birthday’ touching his face again like you have no need to but you do and you need to be making contact somehow and this is the totally platonic vibes we can go for as we’re now sat here kicking our legs ‘what do you most want to do?’]

Liam: [his own hand drifting close to her face but still teasingly far enough away that it isn’t right in her grill/next to her mouth and it could just be bants that he’s moving his thumb and finger wide apart and offering her that web of skin between them (which obvs is right near where this tat is) as he says ‘been waiting on you to bite us from when I threw it out there’ totally platonic vibes yep, such a weird thing to just say you want but they are those bitches, love that we’re testing her reaction to this odd request like jk unless you’re into it tho]

Edie: [LOOKING at him from between his finger and thumb because we need to study you until we can be convinced what the vibe is here, are we joking, are we not, is this platonic weirdo behaviour or is it more, you’re never going to be able to be 100% but the last thing you want is to completely misjudge it, moving your face closer and baring your teeth]

Liam: [imagine if she did totally misread the vibe and that was the end of this convo like lol bye, but thankfully not because he’s moving both his hand closer to her bared teeth and the rest of his body as close as this kitchen cabinet will allow]

Edie: [grazing your teeth over his skin SO gently, as if you’re debating this and could still turn back and act as if this hadn’t happened, the beat it takes you to conclude you’re not going to ask him how hard he wants you to do this and are instead going to maintain eye contact so you can see for yourself exactly how far he wants you to take it]

Liam: [mhmm, the girls are dipping their toes in before they conceive a child on a bouncy castle and I respect it, y’all are testing each other and checking at every step of the way and I love that, in the beat she left saying ‘tell a lie, you’re no cricket’ because I realised I’ve repeated myself somehow and saying this feels like nothing else fits better later where I’ve ended up leaving it but hopefully this is giving the same energy of incomparable, can’t relate it to a bug bite mem or anything else and she’s gonna go through with this, maintaining the eye contact and taking her arm with his other hand to press down along the L how hard he wants her to do it because mind reading is happening as per]

Edie: [you can’t go 0-60, well, you can but not quite that hardcore lmao, not you smiling at his words with this skin still between your teeth, looking truly unhinged in a way that only a boy who was into you would appreciate so thank god he is, gotta do a little more grazing and teasing, sticking your tongue out too because another sensation he’s unlikely felt like this, before, of course, obliging and matching the pressure he’s bringing, using your hands to tug him closer however possible that is]

Liam: [me knowing this boy is red and flushed rn and this kitchen isn’t that hot even in august cos it’s ireland and the oven has been off for a minute now lol, god bless how into it you are sir, doing a lil noise about it which starts with the tongue thing and carries on with more !! when she does her bite, immediately taking her arm again and doing his own on her in the fold of her arm where it bends because near to her tattoo and giving the same energy, trying to match hers but being less restrained about it and therefore accidentally going a bit harder because we’re feeling a type of way]

Edie: [making your own noise at his reaction, which starts with how red he is, swiping at his cheeks like you can take the colour from them the same as the glitter, not scratching him but you are gripping at him with !! when he’s going to bite you too because you can’t help it, at least you can move those claws around to the back of his neck, pulling yourself closer to him letting him know you’re not at all mad about how hard he’s gone]

Liam: [picking her up yet again, this time because he’s frustrated at how the kitchen cupboard means they can’t get close enough to each other and it’s CLEARLY what they both want, throwing her on the sofa again but with much more !! energy than he did before because  all the playfulness and bants is gone and instead he’s getting on top of her as soon as he has and KISSING her like it’s the first time ever because the previous is such a distant mem compared to this energy I’m sure, y’all were so much younger then despite it not being long ago actually because she hadn’t been nonced on and his sister hadn’t died, soz lads we’ve really put you through it and there’s more to come]

Edie: [this kiss is going to be EVERYTHING, like, in the grand scheme of things, yes, it’s not been that long but also you’re children so a year is a huge amount of time and you don’t know, he could have never wanted to kiss you again so it’s literally like he has returned from war, the drama is off the charts, not needing to think about it to put all of how much you missed him into how feverishly you’re responding to him here]

Liam: [mhmm, enjoy your makeout sesh lads nobody could deserve it more and he equally feels as though they’ve both returned and there’s so much he has to put into every sec of this while he can because he’s CLEARLY turned on rn but we know getting there isn’t the issue it’s maintaining it and he’d know that too from his alone time and any other moments y’all have had that have been vibey without getting to this point, so feeling like you’re on borrowed time and have to do the absolute most to let her know and feel how you feel while you feel it, hence at some point y’all should 100% roll off this sofa but thankfully near enough/ onto the pillows y’all were lying on before that you can just carry on without caring]

Edie: [it is precarious but doing the most to keep you in this moment and not thinking/worrying about that because would not care if all you did was stayed here kissing, we just want to stay close to you, feel as though we’ve got through, pressing on his tattoo and smiling into his mouth about it because never over it even though you’re the one who started it, still can’t believe you did that]

Liam: [we gotta be kind and let y’all stay here kissing for a long time because deserved and you would, make another lil noise when she presses on your tattoo and you feel her smile because you also would, break the kiss but not really because he’s kissing her entire arm instead basically even if he has to literally undo the cuff of the shirt she’s wearing in those pics and roll it up/get her arm fully out of it, all adding to the !! and anticipation because can’t just kiss where her tattoo and lovebite are though he obvs is, gotta be dramatic about it]

Edie: [watching him so intently it’s practically a STARE but you’re moving too much to have full intensity, not to mention the noises you’re making like he’s doing way more than kissing up your arm because so about how extra he’s being ‘God, I missed you’]

Liam: [we all know he’s maintaining insane eye contact as much as he can too, it’s necessary, only dipping his head when he gets really lost in these antics like doing his own teeth graze lightly across her wrist or when he pushes his tongue against her palm or in between her fingers, we’re here vibing, living our best lives cos can’t even express in words how much we missed this gal hence all this]

Edie: [wrapping your legs around him and running your feet down the back of his legs, needing to touch him and show it too, your breathing sounding insane by this point, touching his tongue with the curiosity of this all being new, holding it out as far as you can, leaning down to lick his tongue and kiss it]

Liam: [you’re definitely the same as far as insane breathing goes, sounding like a panting dog basically when she’s holding his tongue out, doing the biggest noise he’s done so far when she licks and kisses his tongue because so into it, god bless, another makeout sesh ensuing that’s ever more !! than the first one, this boy here getting hot and sweaty, we’ve gone beyond just flushed]

Edie: [at least it’s August so you going to remove his white tee for him is not that wild, we all know the energy in which you’re doing it but you know, you’re not gonna feel exposed in a bad way boy, really going for this makeout, doing the most with your tongue and biting his lip with the same intensity as you did his hand]

Liam: [me like if we were evil his mum would come back for lunch rn and walk in on this but we’ve been evil enough to y’all with the rest of your circumstances so we will not and you’re truly welcome because he’s gotta bite her tongue rn immediately, they are too busy for you irish Emma stay at work please because he’s really doing the most with how he’s moving and we can’t be interrupting that]

Edie: [you eat your lunch at work ma’am, we’re not being ruder than we have to be which is very, lord knows this is deserved and we’re gonna let it go right thanks very much, the NOISE that is so muffled by the fact he has hold of your tongue rn, so pushing up into him as if the message might’ve got lost in translation because of]

Liam: [kissing her SO hard in response to that moan that when he breaks away a string of spit literally still connects them because gross but cute is their brand, only breaking away at all cos he’s undone her shirt buttons, absolutely accidentally and without realising pulling off a button in the process because obvs, and he needs to use that wet wet mouth on all the skin of her neck, chest and stomach that he has uncovered by opening this shirt, gotta be done]

Edie: [saying his name like you’re saying hello, the TONE because of how much feeling is being put across here, how much you’ve missed him, now how much you want him too, trying to watch him but being unable to not throw your head back, screw your eyes shut etc etc in pleasure]

Liam: [me like don’t hit your head on the floor girl, not that you’d care but I do I’m a grandma and I worry about these things that y’all will never, me also like don’t worry girl he’s watching you SO intently as if that’s how this works and you can telepathically watch this back later via his eyes lol but you know, he’s feeling similarly though and his version of it is opening his mouth to say a million things but the gesture becoming more kisses instead because that much he could say where do you start]

Edie: [don’t worry boo, there’s pillows lol, and don’t y’all worry about talking right now because you can’t like my boo said when there is so much being unsaid atm and you don’t need to in this precise moment when y’all can just be having the most serious makeout y’all have ever had]

Liam: [my boo is exactly right, y’all are both essentially topless rn and it definitely wouldn’t have gone that far previously so all y’all care about is that rn as you should, hence him switching up their positions atm immediately so she is on top of him instead of vice versa so that there’s more room to appreciate that fact rather than being skin to skin chest to chest how you were, because that’s a vibe but his giant body would lowkey be crushing hers and there wouldn’t be enough room for him to be as dramatic as he wants with all these kisses and touches]

Edie: [mhmm, y’all are shook in the best way and aren’t thinking of doing anything that could ruin this vibe, which might include talking too much, the way you are truly gazing into this boy's eyes until you can’t stand it and cover your own with your hands as you attempt to deal which is obviously not happening because of how he’s still kissing and touching you ‘they’re so warm’ as an attempt to explain how you’re feeling when you cannot, reaching your fingers out like you’re going to poke his eyes but obviously you do not lol, closing his eyelids though and kissing each eye so soft yet !!]

Liam: [shook is correct because y’all did not think this would be happening for your own separate reasons, this boy would think that any second could be the last in this vibe cos never know when he’s gonna be grief cockblocked or by what so truly trying to make the most of every single one here just in case, doing the most unable to stop, literally the first second he is vaguely still is when she closes his eyelids and sis the SIGH, we can’t discuss it, dying at being able to feel all this because there’s a momentary pause in his antics to let him for the first time since they started this] 

Edie: [we all get it but are so obviously buzzing with your reaction, even with your eyes closed you’ll be able to tell by the squeal that is happening, peppering more kisses all over his entire face, inadvertently pressing your body closer to his again, picking up his hands to put them on you, on your waist and on your boobs respectively, moving back ‘you can open ‘em again’ as a whisper as you do]

Liam: [we’re all like boy it’s okay you can relax but he cannot there is too much feral energy he wants to express on the borrowed time he’s assuming he’s on, we gotta take a sec to discuss his hands though fr, the cool lil scar(s) he would already have from the fires he’s already done that aren’t as dramatic as the one we’re gonna give him, what a mood what a moment, but anyway, do open your eyes so you can LOOK at her while you also TOUCH her in the most deliberate way you have so far]

Edie: [we are clearly about his hands and any and all scars he has because that sort of bear, hence STARING at his hands unblinkingly as they touch you, not even able to return that LOOK right now because this is the furthest it’s ever gone and you’re so !! about that fact]

Liam: [the girls are both !! because y’all didn’t think you’d get here after drifting apart the furthest you ever have recently so that makes everything hit extra hard obvs, likewise REFUSING to close his eyes again as if they are a camera and he needs to capture every second of this, truly god bless, literally only able to do the kind of swallow you have to when there is too much spit in your mouth and you feel like you’re about to choke to death on it if you don’t]

Edie: [we don’t want to think about it hence we’re having to launch at you with a makeout attack at this throat-clearing moment because truly must not think about why here and now or we’ll derail this train and she does not want that, ‘scuse the way we’re pinning you with it lowkey but needs must]

Liam: [you’re excused girl he won’t mind being pinned or having another makeout sesh remotely and he’ll be letting her know that by giving his ALL to it immediately as if this is the first time they have kissed today because similarly can’t and doesn’t want to stop and think about many things]

Edie: [soz kids that you do have to face your grief and your trauma but we’ll let you have this for now, you deserve it]

Liam: [they truly do, this boy here buzzing because he hasn’t been grief cockblocked and this is the furthest he’s gone and the most he’s been able to feel in such a long time and you deserve to savour that sir because little do you know you’re about to get cockblocked by something much bigger for a much longer time, hence saying ‘this feels-’ as if she has asked him again like she did with the tattoo and that’s a full sentence because it practically is between all this kissing you’re doing and because of the way he’s saying it]

Edie: [nodding, slowly at first but ultimately being more erratic after you open your mouth to say an ‘I know’ but before you can say anything an unholy noise comes out instead, prompting you to be moving against him in a very deliberate way as you continue to kiss]

Liam: [matching the way she’s moving in his own very deliberate way so that y’all have a rhythm going consistently here for the first time which elicits a grunt of pleasure from him because feeling a type of way about it that we cannot believe we get to feel rn, so there’s 0 hesitation in groping her boobs again with even more !! as part of these kissing and dryhumping antics]

Edie: [responding to his grunt by biting down on his lip harder than you intended but now are running with, going from bruising his lips up to giving him a lovebite, pressing your face into his neck and just breathing him in so dramatically as if you’re trying to calm yourself down even though your continued pace says otherwise ‘I want-’ as a full sentence because obvious but needs to be said]

Liam: [echoing her by going to say an I know but a sound coming out instead because I simply must, can only nod and do a hair pull that brings her back into a kiss so that there’s another echo in him biting her tongue again because she bite his lip, the same as earlier but he’s likewise doing it harder than he did then, we love all these accidental repetitions happening]

Edie: [living laughing loving it all tbh, something between a straight up moan and a giggle at this tongue biting because he’s weird and you love it but also it’s hot and you love it, taking the chance to be all up in his hair]

Liam: [mhmm, they couldn’t be having a better time and I’m so glad, catch this boy finishing his sentence from before about how this feels as if there has been no pause because he is weird, so ‘-like nothing else’ coming out of his mouth because it’s incomparable and the way he’s saying it can’t be overstated either, just indecent because she is all up in his hair and we’re about it, you know all too well that his hand couldn’t be more tangled or basically balled up like a fist around hers atm]

Edie: [‘yeah’ and it cannot be overstated how sincere and real and !! that yeah just was, it should be YEAH tbh but we’re not shouting, just the vibes because truly, if this wasn’t incomparable we’d be in trouble and it speaks to how much she loves you that her brain is not going to anywhere dark like that in the moment]

Liam: [literally hence he has to break these kisses for a beat to give her DRAMATIC hearteyes because he can feel how sincere it was and he wants to be able to feel as deeply as she can SO MUCH, no notes I am just hormonal and emosh]

Edie: [my boo says damnit it don’t cry Junie, you poor children, you do not deserve the shit life/we have put you through and are going to continue to but that’s just how your cookie has crumbled soz forreal]

Liam: [seriously, we really said time to be EVIL but hey y’all aren’t dead and I’ll take that, as well as the fact you don’t know yet what’s coming, keep kissing lads, you gotta, go from her neck down until you’ve got your mouth all over her chest again, with more !! than before when you first did it, that goes without saying]

Edie: [I still think the post coming is a shout to break y’all up but also we could have pushback here because she wants to touch him but also knows that’s a big deal so she is going to ask and not just try and see]

Liam: [we don’t have to kill the vibe by saying he gets heartbreaking post, in this version he can have had the stuff from his sister before she showed up like he did the other cards he destroyed, it would actually be fitting if it’s his bday but there’s nothing for him it’s just bills or whatever for his mum because that shows how far removed he is from everyone and all the friends etc they clearly used to have]

Edie: [fair point girl, we’ll go with that then, can still be girl interrupted by it but it doesn’t have to be the drama, maybe he’ll talk about it later without needing to have that visceral reaction]

Liam: [me like is the post gonna be enough to cockblock these horny teens though, especially if y’all just hear post hit the mat and then carry on lol, we might have to let y’all escalate this until you both die without escalating it into a full hookup]

Edie: [my boo says I don’t think so and she’s so real for that, you by no means need to jump straight to hookup, there are lots of steps inbetween there and stopping so agreed]

Liam: [exactly and he’s a teenage boy who is a complete and utter virgin so it isn’t gonna take much to kill him, like, if I was being brutally real it probably would’ve already happened like a sec into them making out but I’m not trying to do him that dirty on this day all things considered]

Edie: [the drag, we won’t do you like that gals, this is nothing but a joyous occasion thank you, imagine the elation if you’ve not been able to cum even on your own for however long/it’s a rare occasion if you do, best bday present ever soz not soz to be rude]

Liam: [it is, I was trying to avoid it happening without her touching him because that’s too close to the mems of her dad on his bday, lest any of us ever forget, but if she touches him then it’s not the same and we can all be fine with it]

Edie: [you don’t need that tailspin/to think that that’s just your power and you can do that to any and all men, not that you would want to use said powers for evil but still, let’s not go there, the way you are going to be so SHOOK when y’all die though like how do we even process that]

Liam: [like, it lowkey is her power with these 2 men specifically but it’s very much not a parallel we need and thus one I refuse to allow to occur, especially rn, good vibes only, even if y’all will be shook to your cores at everything that has just happened, the way he’ll be saying her name (by which I mean the shortened version/nickname because he has never used her full one a day in his life) with all the !! and feeling in the world when his happens because omg CANNOT believe it is about to and we MUST warn her and then actually does in a manner that’d feel super dramatic because it’s been so long that this boy has forgotten what it’s even like, would feel like forever at their age, any span of time will]

Edie: [couldn’t be more obsessed if we tried, thank god you are too busy dying or you may be put off by how intensely you are being watched, at least the way it is going to kill her in response isn’t at all off putting]

Liam: [it’s fine we all know their intensity matches, this boy couldn’t be put off if she tried, he’d be filming all of this if he could lol, love you weirdos]

Edie: [there’s time for that later, speaking of though, did y’all leave the film on because I’d like to think if you did the credits are cinematically rolling right now]

Liam: [they absolutely did not even pause it nevermind turn it off so I LOVE that for you both, iconic]

Edie: [letting that speak for you because you wouldn’t know where to start if you even had the breath for it, grinning at him with the slightest of worry behind your otherwise buzzing expression, always here like was that okay, is it]

Liam: [me like worry not and once again emosh because he’s smiling back at her the kind of equally buzzing and sincere grin the likes of which she would not have seen since before his sister got sick again which is like 2 years or something wild at this point, here genuinely amused by the timing of those credits and genuinely feeling good in this moment]

Edie: [the way you’d wanna cry, you are that girl, turn away to get your shirt back on and buttoned up so you don’t lol, just missed him so hard and how you both got to be pre this death, unburdened and innocent]

Liam: [me too gal me too, but likewise put your t-shirt back on sweaty and then go have another look through her pull along trailer’s worth of bday stuff she brought to find some more stuff to mess with, I imagine you pulling a party popper right in her grill, which I would HATE but she’ll be about]

Edie: [raising your brows at him with a smirk ‘i’m glad you made the obvious reference’ because how on the nose lmao, but dragging him over to the nearest camera that’s sitting about like let’s film another one being popped with the slow-mo of it all]

Liam: [my boo says what a thing to do and she’s so right for that, pick all the crap out of her hair in a very loving way actually because it’s as obvious you have to, and then yeah, do film that and then piss about filming her again how you always do whenever there’s a camera in your hand]

Edie: [pop off being artsy with these party supplies because the ways you could be are endless lads, we don’t need to list ‘em all but you know the vibe, being generally destructive for your own entertainment with it]

Liam: [we know y’all’s vibes, I’m sure she’s brought some kind of weird pinata type thing that she’s made out of like paper mache or whatever so it’s even weirder than standard and filled it with things only he would appreciate so you can go to town destroying that as well]

Edie: [you are absolutely your mother’s daughter and that’s 1000% the vibe, as well as you having brought ingredients to make cake but obvs not just the standard and yous can get weird with that and the decorating]

Liam: [he’ll be buzzing because he’s so tall they’d have to hang that pinata SO high for him to hit it meaning that he’ll have to pick her up again when it’s her turn and that’s exactly what started all their antics so what a nice parallel, also YES absolutely, do all the baking and you can also make jelly (and maybe even homemade ice cream too if your mum is the sort of bitch who bought an ice cream maker which I feel like she defs is given your sister is the OG sick kid and spoilt) so we can bring back jelly and ice cream from the OG first ever time we did his bday, have an incredible time being artsy and weird]

Edie: [try not to get distracted again challenge commencing now lol, just having the best time ‘til this bouncy castle gets here, which we’re insisting we go and handle whilst he waits inside to keep it a surprise for as long as possible, of course]

Liam: [hang in there girl you can and will hookup on said bouncy castle lol, I’m 100000% sure he’s filming her from where he’s standing at the kitchen window or whatever but zoomed in on her in a way that’s giving he’s entirely focused on her in a !! way and not at all on what she’s doing or what this surprise is because obvs he’s distracted too from the sec he first picks her up but I imagine y’all were throwing yourselves into these activities and hence there’s been no outlet for that yet besides LOOKS and lingering touches over baking etc, aka no new makeout sesh has ensued]

Edie: [we love the stalker vibes now that you don’t get to be one officially, the way she would find this so romantic if she knew lol but we gotta focus and get this up and paid for before we can come back in and attempt to cover your eyes with our hands and walk which is obviously impossible with the height difference so you gotta get whatever you used for a pinata blindfold back again and put it on him]

Liam: [I gotta bring those stalker vibes always and 5ever long before he gets out of prison and can actually lowkey stalk her when his mum carts him off to wherever in northern ireland she has clearly moved back to and y’all are rudely separated by distance because he has to live there for a sec, but anyway, right now, get that tea towel of your mother’s which I’m 100% sure was the blindfold back over your eyes because the way he’d try and pick her up so she can reach to put her hands over his eyes and walk out into the garden is frankly dangerous despite the trust he and I both have in her and their connection]

Edie: [it’s giving JJ assault course and neither of y’all can be injured right now there’s jumping to be done and murders to commit soon, you can however jump into his arms once you’re in the back garden to untie his this tea towel blindfold so he can see this bouncy castle/your buzzing face]

Liam: [my boo is exactly right, no injuries allowed for all the reasons thank you, the way he’ll be immediately buzzing because he can feel she is even before this blindfold is taken off and therefore does not even care what this surprise is because her excitement about it is enough (although it’s slay and he’ll shamelessly also love it when he realises we all know), STARING at her buzzing face for SO long just holding her because he can’t tear his eyes away from it to look at this bouncy castle, like she’ll literally have to say/do something to get him to break this eye contact and the !!]

Edie: [somehow not expecting this and are thus caught off guard with his !! and your subsequent own reaction, reaching out as if you’re going to shut his eyelids with your fingertips again but instead tickling said fingers down to his lips, again, like you might push his mouth into a smile but also not doing that, ending up touching the lovebite you gave him, PRESSING down as you use your other hand to tilt his head so his line of vision should be over yours ‘say you like it’]

Liam: [not you biting those fingers with the exact same pressure she used to bite his hand and started y’all’s antics as a way to say you like it and then throwing her down onto this bouncy castle the exact same way he threw her onto the sofa to start their makeout sesh (but not starting one this time), we just love a throwback, not pausing to take her shoes off before he throws her down so he has to do it when she’s lying there which is so much more !! and intimate]

Edie: [at least you truly have no time to react to any of that because you are literally being bounced to within an inch of your life here, only so !! or composed you can really be either way, just gotta keep trying to bounce him whilst he’s trying to take your shoes off because otherwise how intimate it is is going to be a THING]

Liam: [god bless the playfight this is turning into as he’s doing the most to take her shoes off and generally also keep throwing her about needlessly lol, having the most fun but also being the most distracted by the fact he can literally see/feel his teeth marks in her fingers depending where he’s looking or touching at any given point and is shamelessly turned on by that again]

Edie: [you’re both way too distracted to fully appreciate just playing on this bouncy castle right now but that’s called having hormones, I’m sorry, no avoiding that; doing the thing where you look at where someone is blatantly looking at you and then LOOKING back at him, so casually/the least casually seeing how your teeth fit into the bitemarks he’s left behind]

Liam: [mhmm and y’all very much do have hormones or we wouldn’t be here, for better and worse, hence STARING at her doing this as uncasually because the teeth comparison is as important and their weird equivalent of hand measuring so it’s gotta be done, biting his lip as if he’s seeing how his fit into hers that way at the same time obvs]

Edie: [such intense eye contact being maintained this entire time, which considering the way y’all are not speaking should be weird but it isn’t, but actually saying something for once when you’ve taken your finger out of your mouth and are leaning on your chin just looking at him ‘it worked’ because still shocked it did]

Liam: [so many people cannot handle a silence especially when the moment is as charged as this one clearly is but thankfully y’all aren’t those peeps because he is a boy of few words especially in this era, thus a nod because you are likewise shocked and it’s really your eyes which are portraying that as you continue to look at her]

Edie: [‘what was different?’ said very much with a tone of wanting to keep doing whatever she’s been doing so it can be but also not assuming it’s that simple, obviously, reaching out to touch whatever you can reach on his body from where you’re laying, whether that’s his arm of his leg or his side, whatever]

Liam: [a shrug because you don’t know despite having asked yourself the same question ofc, but a shrug that deliberately brings your body closer to hers however y’all are positioned because it doesn’t really matter why ultimately to you as a teenage boy you’re just glad that it did work regardless and you’re not trying to overthink it in case that leads to it never happening again]

Edie: [positioning yourself/turning to face him if necessary so you can bump your forehead to his to be like I understand without verbally saying so]

Liam: [‘I’ve missed you too’ after a pause of however long that they are just doing a forehead touch because she said it way earlier and he did not and we all know it’s part of the reason why, the distance between them and feeling like he could actually be losing her too]

[punkscowardschampions]

#here we are #liams bday and the start of so much drama bb #cute n weird is yalls vibe yep #inspo #faces #edie mckenna #edam

[punkscowardschampions]

Mali

Ali: Care to explain why Edie is in bits

Moses: Why you asking us? Ask her

Ali: I obviously have, Moses

Moses: Well you have your answer then, don’t you?

Ali: No because whatever it is, she can’t talk about it

Moses: So stay out of it

Ali: I think not

Ali: What did you say to her?

Moses: Jesus, woman, leave us alone

Moses: whatever’s been said it’s between me and her

Ali: No not if you’re going to leave her like this, because you won’t be given time alone if you can’t be trusted

Moses: I’ll be given all the time alone with my daughter she decides, it’s her trust

Ali: I wouldn’t hold your breath

Ali: Whatever the fuck you did, think on, yeah

Moses: You’re loving this, that’s fucking obvious, like

Ali: Why would I love anything about this?

Ali: The time you show, and you make her this gutted, it’s heartbreaking

Moses: Don’t act like this has never happened before, you know how she gets when the time comes for me to go

Moses: but nah, then you can’t accuse us of fucking everything up

Ali: I know what that looks like

Ali: she would be telling me if it was that, I’m used to that

Moses: What you’re holding your breath for is her being proper upset with me

Ali: She is

Ali: I don’t care if it’s your birthday, you make it up to her 

Moses: Who do you reckon you are talking to us like this on any day, never mind my birthday

Ali: I’m not playing games about her, I’m serious

Ali: Talk to me like I’m an idiot all you want but we both know you did something

Moses: And I’m not? That’s what you always think, first excuse to look down your nose at me there you are

Ali: I don’t care about your feelings, I’m telling you, you have upset her, do something about it or don’t

Ali: I’ll be there regardless

Moses: I don’t need telling what to do or say, least of all by you

Ali: Jesus, but I look down my nose, okay

Moses: I’m not, I’m saying you barely know how the girl feels, it’s laughable you’d try and lecture me, that’s what the truth is

Ali: You think you know, do you

Moses: Yeah, I know her inside and out

Ali: You haven’t seen her since [whenever the last time before this was] and it wasn’t regular before that

Ali: She puts on the act you want to see when you’re around

Moses: She talks to me, something else that ‘course you wouldn’t have the first clue about when it’s happening right in front of yous all the time

Ali: What are you going on about?

Moses: I’m on about knowing her, which as I said, I do, better than you

Ali: You don’t 

Ali: You should know her as well as me but here we are

Moses: Here you are jumping down my throat and to conclusions how you can’t ever help but to

Ali: You left her hiding out in the barn, there’s no jumping needed, you didn’t bother to see the state she was in

Moses: She needed to calm down, like mother like daughter

Ali: Why would I ever expect you to be a rational adult about anything, fine

Ali: thank you for being no help whatsoever, I will deal with this by myself

Moses: I’ll deal with it, she’ll come to me when she’s ready

Ali: When you need to apologise to someone, you don’t make them come to you

Moses: She knows what she did, when she apologises to me, I’ll apologise to her

Ali: She’s a child

Moses: Yeah, mine

Moses: and I’ve said I’ll handle it my way

Ali: There are no secrets, to co-parent you tell me what happens and when and I do the same to you, it’s simple

Ali: because you’re not making her apologise for something if I don’t agree it’s anything she needs to be sorry for

Moses: What should be simple is it’s nothing to do with you, to co-parent you need trust and you either do or you don’t trust me

Ali: She’s my child, it’s everything to do with me

Moses: She’s my child too, I’m not in your face telling you how to look after her when I’m not there

Ali: I’ve raised her for the past 13 years, you’re not finding fault now

Moses: And you’d have it be I’ve never done nothing

Ali: No but you’re not a full-time parent, that’s how it’s been for a long time now

Moses: Because you left me, how’s that blame mine?

Ali: People still make a 50/50 split, or try to

Ali: There’s no blame, people don’t work out, it is what it is

Moses: You don’t know how to make it work is what it is and that’s upsetting her more than anything I’ve done

Ali: What did she say?

Moses: Come on, she wants a proper family, that’s all she’s ever been after

Ali: A proper family only being a mammy, a daddy and a baby is just a fairytale

Moses: Weren’t me who filled her head with ‘em

Ali: Sure

Moses: Close your legs for a minute and talk to her, maybe she wouldn’t be so upset

Ali: Nice try

Moses: It ain’t nice to be behaving how you are

Ali: You don’t know the first thing about me, let’s not pretend

Moses: Sure we’ll pretend you’re not blatant with your obsession over my cousin, again

Moses: I don’t know how you aren’t embarrassed, fair cop to you

Ali: I’ve nothing to be embarrassed about

Moses: You’ve no shame, more like

Moses: but your kids have

Ali: Pot kettle

Ali: If you’re giving yourself a pep talk, find a mirror

Moses: I don’t carry on like that now, if you listened when I’d told you, you might find a comeback what rings truer

Ali: I’m not looking for a ‘comeback’ I’m not playing these games with you

Moses: What games?

Ali: You know what games

Ali: All we need is to get on enough for her sake, can’t we do that?

Moses: You’re the one picking fights with me

Ali: I was just worried about her, I’m not being dramatic, she wasn’t upset how she normally would be, okay

Moses: She put pressure on herself to give us the perfect birthday, it weren’t, I don’t know what else to tell you

Ali: Could you not fake it a little better?

Ali: Alright, well, that’s fixable, anyway

Moses: I gave her exactly what she wanted, it’s not my fault she changes her mind what that is all the time

Ali: She’s a teenage girl, that’s what they do

Moses: She’s barely said a word to me since [whatever o clock] I could’ve brought her home but I didn’t, I kept trying and waiting

Ali: I’m sure it just got a little overhyped in her head, it makes the reality lesser

Ali: I’ll make sure she’s okay

Moses: She wouldn’t eat, so

Ali: I’ll feed her, don’t worry

Moses: I am, I didn’t drive all that way to fall out with her, it wasn’t meant to be like that

Ali: Of course not

Ali: it’s bad timing but it can’t be helped

Moses: Tell her I’m sorry, can’t you?

Ali: Alright

Moses: She’s the same as you, she don’t listen

Ali: I listen

Moses: Not to me

Ali: I do

Ali: You know how it is, you have to shoot first ask questions later when it comes to kids

Moses: I know how it is, you’re only after seeing the bad I do, never the good

Moses: while he can do no wrong in your eyes, that’s how it’s always been

Ali: I do see all the bad he’s done too, I can’t convince you of that but 

Moses: You’re just saying that, you can’t even convince yourself of it

Ali: I’m not an idiot, how could I not see it

Ali: and I see my own, all of us

Moses: All I’ve ever done is love her and it ain’t good enough for you, it never was

Ali: I’ve never stopped you seeing her, or anything like that, how is that me saying it’s not good enough?

Moses: If she can’t love me how she’s supposed to it’s your fault

Ali: No, it’s not

Moses: Yeah it is, she must take after you

Ali: I’m incapable of love now, am I

Moses: Of anyone but him you are

Ali: I love lots have people, have loved more

Moses: Say what you want but you’ve put a hole in her for not getting a grip

Ali: You say this like we’d have lasted, like it’d be any different

Moses: I could’ve sorted you out if you’d let me

Ali: You just wanted to get at him, say you had

Ali: then, sure, we had fun 

Moses: Fun? Didn’t I look after Rio as good as if she was mine? Didn’t I care for you?

Ali: Yes, you did

Ali: that’s not reason enough for us to stay together, was it

Moses: We had a baby together, there’s reason, but you had yours not to

Ali: You didn’t love me

Moses: As much as I could I did

Ali: That’s why we had [however long you lasted]

Moses: He don’t love you, he married my sister and knocked her up 6 times

Ali: He was never going to marry outside of the culture

Moses: People have plenty, it isn’t the big taboo he reckons and told you it is

Ali: He did as he were told

Moses: By his daddy? What kind of man is he for you to love

Moses: he didn’t even do as he told me and leave Carly alone, like

Ali: None of you did

Moses: I never put a baby in her and if I had done I wouldn’t have left it to you to raise

Ali: I wouldn’t be without him

Moses: Not the point, he should have the decency to feel the same, Christ, something for the boy at least, he’s of him and he was the one keeping on about how important family were

Ali: I know

Ali: I can’t answer the why or why not for him

Moses: You can answer it for yourself, how you still love him when that’s who he is, but don’t trouble yourself to to me, I’m past caring

Ali: It isn’t a choice

Moses: Oh please

Ali: Oh please what, it isn’t

Moses: You’ve got the choice to focus on your family, our daughter who you think is so upset

Ali: I am, you brought him up

Moses: Sure you are

Ali: You said you don’t care

Moses: I care about my baby and you bringing all this around her

Ali: Nothing is being brought around her

Ali: She decided to speak to him herself

Moses: She saw us, she’ll see you and him, if she hasn’t already

Ali: We were together when she was a baby

Ali: They aren’t real memories, you fill in blanks and make stories in your head, you were gone before she’d have any proper ones, that’s why she makes them elaborate 

Moses: They sounded pretty real to how I remember it, are you gonna say I’m making mine up too?

Ali: Why were you talking about that, how’d it come up?

Moses: We talk about everything, I’ve told you

Ali: Go on

Moses: Go on what?

Ali: What did she say she saw?

Moses: Us, am I painting you a picture or can yous take my meaning clear enough?

Ali: Well, I mean, what did she say about it, what was the context?

Moses: We talk about you plenty, us, I don’t know

Ali: Okay, like she was trying to take the piss?

Moses: Why would we be taking the piss out of you?

Ali: And you, like, here’s this embarrassing thing I know that you wouldn’t want me to, or whatever

Moses: She likes shock factor, yeah, you don’t need telling that

Moses: my point was, and is, she’s too smart for you to think you can sneak John past her, you can’t

Ali: That’s not my intention

Moses: It best not be

Ali: You know she asked him to come be with us instead

Moses: I don’t need reminding of what she asked him

Ali: That’s my point, I don’t need to hide anything from her, she wants me to be happy, like I do her

Moses: Whatever, you’ll learn he can’t make you no happier than he did before when he wouldn’t claim you as his then either

Moses: and once she’s upset by it you’ll have us to answer to

Ali: You’re the one that’s upset her, worry about that

Moses: She upset me

Ali: You’re being a baby

Moses: No, my birthday’s been ruined

Ali: You still have the night, go out and enjoy it

Moses: That’s true

Ali: Have fun

Moses: [rudely leave to go and do that as you do]

[punkscowardschampions]

Modie (the dream)

Moses: [anyway, I’m gonna drop my dream here because it can go from when they are at this sketchy pub, that fits and you can tell me if there’s any bits you like/wanna carry forward or what bits you don’t and if you wanna go in a different direction entirely, seeing as I had it and I wrote it down lol, bear with because it’s an essay]

Moses: [right so let’s say we’re at this sketchy pub like I said… he sat her on his knee like you would a little kid (except not at all because it's y'all) and he was doing BIG strokes of her hair like his cousin and brother do to Ali and therefore why wouldn't you have also done that to her and now this gal, running his fingers through it because he's not over how much she looks like him with it even though he would've been STARING at her at so many points this entire day thus far, pulling it off her neck and holding it how you do when you're holding someone's hair back for them to be sick or if you're gonna hold it in a ponytail for them that kind of energy, literally kissing the back of her neck despite the fact and because of the fact they are in public, bouncing her on his knee a lil bit because we ALL know she can't keep still about this and then finding where she cut off a strand of her hair from and kissing her there too (because I vibe that she has sent that off in the post to arrive when he's back where he's working and missing her, which makes sense because you'd want the dye job to be fresh to death and not at all faded for when you see him hence you've only just done it, which btw imagine if she had and he again didn't come, she'd literally end up cutting off all her hair and being bald!) before he led her to the toilets of this place and he literally sat her on the baby changing thing because duh she is his baby (which was thankfully clean and not gross) to be indecent…

and how it went was that he brushed a finger over her bottom lip really lightly and then put it in her mouth just enough to be slightly wet but not enough that it was fully in her mouth or that she could suck it (to give slow and gentle and soft vibes only as well as do the most and draw this out let's not lie) and then he used that finger, lightly brushing it over her clit the same way he did her bottom lip (it cannot be overstated how lightly at first or how much he was taking his time so that she knew it would be like that when they eventually hooked up and she could trust him and he wouldn't hurt her, as well as again to do the most and draw it out in this vaguely public setting, let's again not lie) then obvs he gradually did more until he graduated from that finger being inside of her to using 3 (because sacred number, so again duh it had to be) still slowly but so !! and thoroughly, and speaking of thorough, the way he was studying her every reaction this entire time to make sure she was okay and he wasn't doing too much was insanely intense frankly, sometimes he'd literally backtrack a few steps going back to doing less and there was even a point that he started all over again from the start and built it back up (as if they weren't in a toilet together that someone could be waiting to use) + don't even start me on the EYE CONTACT when he wasn't studying her face or her body's reactions and their eyes were just LOCKED on each others, the indecency, so yeah she DIED about it all because how could she not and not only that, more importantly the sight and feel of her cumming on his fingers made him cum right there in his pants and when I tell you the man was SHOOK lol because that had clearly never happened before given that he hadn't even been touched or dry humped upon and so he couldn't even get the words out to tell her or make himself believe it was really happening, he was just like 'I'm gonna-' and then he was, barely managing to choke out the word 'fuck' in his disbelief and then saying 'baby' with ALL the feeling before he was DEAD too and had to pull her to him almost off the baby changing thing with his !! while he breathed heavily and they just LOOKED at each other for a minute before he eventually recovered enough to suck his fingers clean and taste her, breathlessly in her ear telling her how she tastes better than whatever he said Alison did and both their fave flavours of cake, then he kissed her quickly (because he didn't trust himself not to turn it into a full makeout sesh and escalate things even further otherwise) but dramatically so she could taste herself too in his mouth…

and anyway then he redressed her and carried her out of this bathroom (because in no world could she walk after that and he wasn't in the mood to let her) and they went to go on their shopping spree because he needed a new outfit to wear out of said shop since he's leaving this bathroom with a very visible and unmistakable wet patch on his trousers and they've still got more things to go and do like his tattoo and food so, that was the end of my dream except to say that when he wore his new outfit out of the shop his old one was in the bag and at some point before he left she stole his underwear out of it and put them into hers (because yeah he 1000% bought her some more stuff even though it's his bday, he's that bitch) so she could keep the underwear he jizzed in, because of course she did]

[punkscowardschampions]

Modie Pt.3

Moses: Am I dressed nice enough for you?

Edie: How am I meant to stop kissing you to do anything we’ve planned when you look like that?

Moses: We’ll have to do it all while you’re kissing me

Edie: You have stubble, it’s going to be all scratchy 😻

Moses: I left it cos I had the knowing you’d like it

Edie: It’s what makes you different, always had, mammy and the others all have soft skin, just daddy felt like that

Moses: They might, but yours is the softest

Edie: I am all your soft

Edie: your 💘 outside you

Moses: Can you feel how mine’s beating inside me right now?

Edie: I’m going to, we’re going to be that close again, all day

Moses: [tell her what drug/s you feel like you’re on and all the ways she makes you feel better than that because we’re feeling extra the closer y’all get to seeing each other irl]

Edie: I’m so desperately in love with you, do you feel that?

Moses: I’m going to 

Edie: You will when I can’t wait, when I was so nervous before and now

Moses: It’s cute how nervous you were

Edie: It might come back when it’s time but

Edie: right now I want to jump on you the second you’re through the door

Moses: [an updated eta giving however many seconds that is, because clearly he’s close af to Ali’s house now]

Moses: I’m almost there, I told you there’s that many of them for us

Edie: You did, you were right

Edie: I need a now though, I’m so, I feel like everyone can see

Moses: I need you now too

Edie: You want me to show you my music room, daddy?

Moses: Where the magic happens

Edie: Exactly

Edie: and I can’t go anywhere or concentrate on anything ‘til you’ve kissed me properly, touched me all the places you want to

Moses: You’d frighten your horse if I didn’t calm you down first

Edie: Horses, you said

Edie: or have you forgotten how good I am, I’ll remind you

Moses: What number did I say?

Edie: However many he’s got

Moses: Lucky you’re very good, or I’d have to go back on my word

Edie: You can tell me anything, do anything, I meant that

Moses: I know

Edie: You know I belong to you, in every way it’s possible to be owned by someone, I want that

Moses: Every part of you

Edie: Pin me down, overwhelm me

Moses: A soundproofed room’s asking for it as much as you are

Edie: How long have I been begging for it, daddy taking off my nice outfit and playing with me

Moses: Too long, but no longer

Moses: [because we gotta let you show up and knock, the way I know he’s holding flowers and a soft toy of some kind that’s probably massive even though it’s his bday not hers, never any chill]

Edie: [at least we are giving no one else the remotest chance to get to this door before us, the way we are flying at you, surprising you don’t end up on the cold hard ground with the force we’re jumping into your arms with, squashing this cuddly and lowkey getting stabbed by the stems of these flowers but we do not care, got to also squash him to death, doing such aggressive kisses all over his face as you’re just squealing daddy over and over because he’s here]

Moses: [me like the rest of the fam stay back please you don’t need to see this, Alison especially though I’m sure you’re lurking because you aren’t expecting him to show up at all never mind on time like he has, oh y’all would LOVE to end up on the floor rn but alas he is simply too strong and however hardcore she’s launching herself at him he’d be ready for it, in that sense at least, loling and grinning because he is buzzing to be here as well and blatantly loves her reaction to him being, rip to these flowers that are probably dropping petals left right and centre getting crushed because he’d be holding her so tightly to his chest rn immediately to feel his heart going insane and they would be crushed to their bodies with no fucks given, then just here basically spinning her around like this is a rom com because we’re so !!]

Edie: [bouncing in his arms in the rhythm of his heart which we know is insane, just looking excited to the point of actual mania about this, catching one of these falling petals and putting it in your bra to have next to your heart ‘you’re so romantic, I love you’ is romantic the word you would use with your dad, not really even though yes, this is very much giving but it could just be a misspoken phrase, nbd, making whatever stuffed animal this is give him kisses too, stroking his stubbly face as you do]

Moses: [not you also catching one of these petals and eating it because you said you’d eat her letter and her hair and want to put every part of her in your mouth and to me it’s giving how my boo wants to put Ang’s head in her mouth, that kind of energy but I’ve corrupted it as per haha, I sure hope nobody saw you do that sir because wtf, at least when you’re kissing this stuffed toy back in a very extra rom com kind of snog manner you can pretend it’s playful and you’re just being silly if anyone sees that and it isn’t just how you wanna kiss her but cannot here in this doorway]

Edie: [not you smacking this toy like a fuming child like absolutely not, unhand my father, so jealous, not knocking it out of his hands though because hiding behind how giant it is to do a lightning flash kiss how you want to, pulling his tongue into your mouth with your teeth and licking the remnants of this petal against your bottom lip]

Moses: [this poor toy getting used and abused but did we expect any less, no absolutely not, only letting it drop to the ground when he’s broken the kiss and it’s safe to do so, purely so he can adjust how he’s holding her to really be holding her tighter, as if he was going to drop her if he didn’t this animal but we all know he wasn’t and he’s just doing the most because !! the flowers are definitely gonna end up falling on the floor too, soz not soz, it just shows how little they matter because he flashes the cash and buys her things at any given opportunity anyway]

Edie: [the excited noises are unhinged, PRESSING into him like your life depends on it, doing more aggressive kisses that are almost like nips and going across his jaw to his ear so you can at least whisper ‘is it really you?’ pinching his cheek like you’re making sure]

Moses: [likewise PULLING her into him like both of their lives depend on it nbd, a sound that we can pretend is finally like oi/steady on/be careful/calm down at the nips she is doing but we both know is nothing of the sort and his jaw isn’t tensing because he’s annoyed at how much she’s being like a rational person would be, we’re just trying not to give ourselves away at the gig lol, pinching her back on both of her cheeks harder than she did it because gotta do it even though it isn’t as hard as he’d like to, which turns into a sort of play/tickle fight moment that would be wholesome if he was just her dad and she was a little kid but here is just flirty, like, he’s literally throwing her around and up and pretending to drop her/have her all but touching the floor only to be pulled back into him as an excuse to touch and manhandle her the absolute most + show off to her how strong he is as per]

Edie: [at least the way you are loling and screaming is giving such childlike energy no one is clocking the flirty vibes this is absolutely giving, the heart eyes likewise are just how you’ve always looked at him, nothing to see here, grabbing onto him like you’re actually in fear for your life and don’t just wanna, doing the whole put me down put me down but protesting too much energy so he knows not to]

Moses: [mhmm, the fact that this is the way they have always acted is doing them a lot of favours, if we can call it that when we wanna actually call the police lol, and will continue to, ramped up though we know their antics have been, I like to imagine that instead of putting her down he’s doing the opposite and carrying on these frankly lowkey dangerous antics towards and on the stairs, intending to take her up them to the music room (though I do think we should have Ali stop y’all from actually going up there whether that’s just by appearing like um where are you going don’t you have places to be?? Or if she actually wants to have a word with either Moses or Edie before they go because that kind of cockblock is realistic and I’m not just saying it to build the tension/for my dream’s sake), the way I’d be screaming not in a fun way at how he’s like dangling her about with no fucks given for the peril because I always told everyone off for playing on the stairs, true story about baby Junie] 

Edie: [it will be easy enough to cockblock y’all because everyone else can wanna say happy birthday to you, Junior would want to follow you into the music room so it’s not happening lads, deal with it]

Moses: [ah the joys of having a big fam, have fun actually having to interact with the other peeps that are around sir, Junior especially, even if this man is literally holding her hand after v reluctantly having to eventually put her down so that she can’t go far from him even then]

Edie: [your nephew and actively so because his dad is the best dad of the bunch so you really would know him quite well, the night and day of how you’re acting because she’s here so quiet now because of course you are when the reality sets in, would walk away if she could but we know we cannot without it being a thing ™ just picking up what you can of the trail of petals you’ve left in your wake, purely as a thing to do and distract]

Moses: [yep there’s really no avoiding that kid until a time comes when you can be like soz we gotta go and flee the scene, luckily you do have a full day of shit planned and peeps know you would because he’s that sort of bear whenever he sees her, they are never just chilling, leave get out and put her in the car like she’s a little baby child, lifting her in and doing her seatbelt and all the things, but letting this car just run for a sec and LOOKING at her instead of actually speeding off to your next destination of horse buying like are you okay because clearly not]

Edie: [sorry that when the mood dies the mood DIES as is the nature of what the fuck y’all are doing, still, regardless of that, you would want him to have a good birthday, so you aren’t trying to freak out in his face about it, just looking around his car/van/whatever like you can find out as much what he’s been up to lately as asking him because lowkey, looking up long enough to do a what are you waiting for kind of smile]

Moses: [^^ that is the tea and what y’all get when you’re living like this so you can’t really push her into staying here and having any kind of interaction rn and you’ve gotta just set off to get her whichever horse she falls in love with most in the hopes that’ll cheer her up and change the vibe back/at least distract her from the sad vibes]

Edie: [thanks for being a horse girl, Billie, very handy for us, we’re here hugging our knees to our chest in our seat, turning on the music so we can put on songs that are not us because we know you were listening to us before you got here and we cannot do that right now]

Moses: [maybe I’ll see if I can find any content of her that fits the horse vibe and post it as him, yikes her song would have come on automatically when the car started yeah because he was listening so that’s awks, change that girl so the car ride is semi bearable before y’all have horses to distract you]

Edie: [I has content if you would like it, will send it to you now but truly, the way we’d flinch like absolutely not lmao, hope these horses are not far because only so much you can do to pretend you’re fine when you aren’t fine, whatever music you’re putting on is definitely upbeat and loud af to do that heavy lifting]

Moses: [I’m sure they aren’t with where Ali is living needing to be in the countryside for its farm vibes and thank god because the mood has taken a DIVE, we can equally thank god that y’all have a full day of activities planned to keep on distracting you if the horses don’t cut it, the next, we know being golf/irish football, it was after that my dream kicked off so at least if you do wanna hear that it isn’t an insane tonal shift because some time between this angst and Winola’s feral dream essay]

Edie: [true true, you only have to suffer this silence that is literally deafening for so long before you’re distracted ‘cos you gotta test ‘em out and see who you bond with and he’s gotta do his thing of making a deal for it so you’re not gonna have time to be worrying about what just occurred/what has been, as for golf/irish football, pick which you’d rather because different vibes for each, both have merits]

Moses: [the dilemma of do we want y’all to be walking round a golf course just the 2 of you because on the negative hand it’s time to think again but on the other it’s time alone which could swing things back to a vibe they started on if she is cheered by horses etc, or do we wanna go with irish football which you can only watch and get invested in so you don’t have time to think much like the horse vibes, idk]

Edie: [mhmm but also it’s a crowd so you can have fun/let’s be honest, get drunk, so that’s where I’m personally swinging, whether that makes things better or worse, like you can get drunk whilst you golf too obvs and other people will be on the course but not going ‘round with you so that’s a very different energy lol]

Moses: [very true, let’s go with irish football, I know fuck all about it soz lads but I think it fits the overall vibe better and would be more likely to get y’all to a happier place than golf will]

Edie: [we don’t need to know, it’s fine, it’s not really the point, no offence lads, he’ll be rooting for someone, it’ll be the general atmosphere of a footie match, she picked it because it’s your kind of vibe, me just here thinking about the logistics of the horse though like, will you pick him up later, are you boarding him at ali’s or on the site that you don’t live at currently, no you haven’t thought this through lmao]

Moses: [it sums him up that he hasn’t thought about a single one of those logistics himself and I know for a fact he hasn’t even discussed this horse with Alison never mind asked her if she wants to keep it at hers and he likewise has not given a thought to who would look after it on site until he’s back if it goes there, I literally imagine he’s just gonna tell his sister that she has to until he’s back and Edie has her own caravan there for her bday to be living in if Ali can’t/won’t have it, the audacity of this man and his big life changing decisions he makes on a whim, excuse you sir this is a real live animal]

Edie: [like horses cost thousands per year, you best be intending to cover that boy because Alison will not see an animal suffer ‘cos you’ve not thought about it properly, we all know for that reason she would take it in but again, y’all will have to have a talk ‘cos she’s going to be like excuse me what do you mean and you can’t call her crazy ‘cos she’s not about to freak about the piercings nor you taking her to what is clearly a sketchy pub]

Moses: [thankfully the cost is one thing he can and would cover because yeah he really has not considered a single thing else about this as per usual and I’m sure he deffo would be trying to gatekeep gaslight and girlboss his way around this but as my boo says he truly cannot when it’s clear to everyone yet again how little you thought the horse through, damn, if I was Ali I would be TIRED, he’s like another child this man]

Edie: [we absolutely are but we’ll never be that bitch to say you can’t see your dad because what is that gonna do, make her go behind your back and do it and be against you, so you can’t win, all you can try and do is talk to her/try and make her see when he’s flopping but that’s not easy when Edie is willing to be pretty damn delulu about it all]

Moses: [anyway, I’m gonna drop my dream here because it can go from when they are at this sketchy pub, that fits and you can tell me if there’s any bits you like/wanna carry forward or what bits you don’t and if you wanna go in a different direction entirely, seeing as I had it and I wrote it down lol, bear with because it’s an essay]

*DREAM*

Edie: [the woman is too stunned to speak lmao but honestly, how are you recovering, how can you carry on, just walking around the rest of this day in a literal daze is the only way to describe it because none of this feels even a little bit real, thinking you’ve just lost your mind, nbd, for purposes of writing I’m wondering where we should skip to, like do we wanna do any of these activities or do we know the vibe?]

Moses: [yeah I’m wondering the same thing whether we know the vibes or if any of these other activities are worth discussing cos I don’t wanna go too hard and have too much happen if we’re saying everything in that dream did but as you said how are y’all just continuing on with said activities as if it didn’t lol, maybe we should skip to the meal as the final thing/him leaving? Because like, you’re busy when shopping and when getting tattoos and piercings but you can’t just eat food and cake in silence/even if you did you’ve still gotta say bye]

Edie: [that makes logical sense because you can be distracted by the world and your tasks everywhere else but if y’all are just having a meal alone, which I’m sure your mother talked you into after you trying to make it a whole family affair, like, there’s nowhere to run lads lmao; I know this restaurant you’ve picked for him is giving such STEAK energy because why are men, fighting for your life with your mostly plant-based diet but you’ve never been less hungry anyway so that’s not a problem, when the waiter has taken your order just looking at him literally like what now, as if he’ll have any more of a clue]

Moses: [like obviously we could be EVIL and say your siblings who would be interested in coming have even if Alison has not if we wanted cos they do have some level of relationship with him and we all know Junior would wanna tag along if nobody else, but regardless of if they are along or not he will continue to piss about to try and cheer her whether that’s playful footsie or it’s giving food fight/the Tony and Effy making a face and flicking food scene with the free bread rolls places like that give you, just being a childish dad]

Edie: [We could say just Junior, because Django wouldn’t want to come, the twins don’t know you like that because that’s after you and that just leaves Rio and imagine how deeply awkward that would be lmao, girl be busy because we’re not doing that, the subtle way you can ignore him without ignoring him by just involving Junior in these childish antics because he is one, I know he’s being a rascal and neither of you is doing anything about it]

Moses: [at least Junior is having a lovely time feeling like a big man with his meal and checking out this new tattoo and getting to misbehave because the way he’d be lowkey so annoyed that he cannot get her attention lol, just giving it all to Junior trying to make her jealous like she’s a child of his age and that’s gonna work]

Edie: [living his best life lmao and thank god because the fakery we’re coming at this with truly like nothing happened is madness but we gotta and won’t be swayed from that in front of Junior, absolutely not]

Moses: [casually the most awkward meal of all time, y’all will be so glad when you’ve gotta get this boy back so Ali can vaguely try and calm him down enough to do his bedtime routine which I know damn well this man will have kept him out past with no fucks given because he’s that sort of bear, not you literally playing her song during the car ride back because you wanna get a reaction out of her which isn’t fake, I say sir not in front of Junior please, god knows what this song is about]

Edie: [not you here acting like you didn’t publish this song for anyone/everyone to see, the dirtiest look as your face is BURNING like I can’t believe you’ve done this lmao, like Junior is gonna be asking her questions because he’ll know it’s her obvs like when did you make this, why didn’t you let me help etc etc like omg, here wanting to turn it off so badly but then he’ll be even more annoying like hey I hadn’t heard that before so you just have to let it play, crossing your arms and doing your best to ignore Junior which is no mean feat because he’s 7]

Moses: [when I just know he’s let Junior sit in the front with him and made her sit at the back because he’s annoyed she’s ignoring him so it wouldn’t be easy for her to turn it off if she wanted to and instead this man will be turning it up when she gives him a dirty look about it because petty king, literally here using the fact that he’s aware Junior is also a musical boy and will be bugging her and that he’s most likely to bug Edie out of everyone anyway because most like her and wants to be closest to her (not quite Grace and Rio levels but still), because he knows this child thanks to Ronan being a hands on dad, against her]

Edie: [at least you can lay across the backseats and turn away from them like you’re having a full teenage strop and aren’t having a far more real and existential moment here, covering your ears dramatically so Junior has to stop talking to you, going on your phone because it’s the easiest way to get Moses back here and now for doing this to you]

Moses: [never thought I’d be glad he drives dangerously with kids in the car but thank god he is speeding so the drive back to Ali’s from this restaurant wouldn’t be as torturously long as it could be, the way I know he’s just fully chucking these kids out of the car when they do get back with no intention of coming in to make sure they are sorted or speak to Ali, instead every intention of just driving away because he’s having his own teenage strop as a full grown man]

Edie: [the way we would not go in/would just be staring him down like are you serious right now, standing outside this car like are you going to do what I think you’re going to do or not]

Moses: [not you changing tact and following Junior in like you really care to make sure he’s okay etc purely to leave her standing by this car because so mature lol lol]

Edie: [so glad there are so many places to hide around here because you’re going to need to, you can tell Ali where Edie is, have fun with that, sir]

Moses: [me dying at his audacity to give Ali the brush off as well like soz gotta go I’ve got a long drive back bye under these circumstances, like ARE you gonna tell her where Edie is sir absolutely not because you don’t actually know in the same way you always get deets wrong and so you’ll just say she’s throwing a strop/upset you’re leaving etc etc that kind of vibe and leave Ali to find her like we all don’t know damn well what you did and what the truth is, please leave hun you’ve done quite enough on this day and you haven’t even told her about this horse yet either]

Edie: [my boo says oh you rat, the drama and the angst as she hears him driving off from the barn/wherever else she could be]

Moses: [it does give you the option though to come at me as either of them though depending how you’re feeling so that’s nice, the way this is like a lovers tiff storming off situation has SENT me, excuse me you’re her father not her boyfriend]

Edie: [I’ll come at you as Edie first, even if it doesn’t become a full conversation, giving the same night but later, like he’s had the time to drive back and get this message when he’s there energy]

Edie: Don’t bother coming back for my birthday, or, at least, don’t bother with me 

Moses: [giving even later like you got back and went out despite being in the pub with her before so there’s absolutely not need but you obvs have sorrows to be drowned]

Moses: I wouldn’t, you didn’t need to bother sending that message

Edie: Too late now

Moses: Past your bedtime, on you go

Edie: You’re no father

Moses: I’m the only one you’ve got, little girl

Moses: don’t you speak to me like that

Edie: I can speak to you however I want

Moses: That’s what you reckon

Edie: That’s how it is, you should’ve thought about a lot before you ruined everything

Moses: I should’ve? It was you who ruined my birthday

Edie: You’ve had plenty

Moses: Don’t go crying now

Moses: you knew what you were letting yourself in for

Edie: Crying?

Edie: I feel sick, you make me sick

Moses: I gave you what you wanted, maybe you are sick

Edie: You’re meant to know what’s right, meant to do it

Edie: not this

Moses: I’ve no time for this

Edie: Right, go back to having no time for me

Moses: I haven’t none if this is how you’re going to be 

Edie: Like what

Moses: Blaming us for your behaviour

Edie: Fine, fine

Edie: it’s all my fault

Moses: It’s not mine that you’re only a tease and everything you said was a lie

Edie: It’s not real life, today proved it, don’t blame me 

Moses: You’re blaming me when I did what yous told me you wanted, so what did I do wrong, exactly?

Edie: What do you mean, you know it was wrong

Moses: Why didn’t it feel wrong then?

Edie: It made the rest of the day wrong, I couldn’t be with you, you didn’t talk to me

Moses: You liked it, but whatever, blame me, yeah

Edie: You started it

Moses: You started it in your mammy’s house, give over

Edie: You don’t even care, what this means

Moses: You don’t care about my feelings, why would I yours?

Edie: You’re meant to love me

Moses: Did I force you to kiss me or invite us up to your music room before that? 

Moses: you said you loved me and plenty else, but I bent over backwards to prove mine to you today and you keep on throwing it in my face

Edie: I didn’t say you forced me

Moses: Because I’ve never

Edie: It ruined your birthday

Edie: I want you more than I want this, that’s my point

Moses: How you acted up ruined my birthday, now you want to talk after ignoring me half the day

Edie: I’m trying to explain

Edie: how could I act normal, after that

Moses: You didn’t stop us, if I’d known you were going to be in that mood about it I would’ve

Edie: I’m sorry

Moses: Too late

Edie: It’s not, you can take my birthday and do whatever you want

Moses: The birthday you’ve banned us from spending with you, sure, I’ll be in a proper mood myself to celebrate, won’t I?

Edie: You already weren’t coming back

Moses: ‘Course I was, I mean what I say, I’ll be living back it’s all arranged

Edie: Not bothering then, you know what I mean

Moses: Don’t speak for me

Edie: You said it

Moses: You’re welcome, here I am giving you what you’re after again

Edie: I just want us to go back

Moses: Well wes can’t, you pushed everything too far

Edie: Why won’t you try

Moses: How can I, I’m not allowed to see you and you won’t talk to me

Edie: Who said

Moses: You said

Edie: I said don’t bother because today wasn’t worth you bothering with

Moses: It wasn’t worth it to you cos I won’t give you your own way and a sorry when I’m not

Edie: You already got me [whatever you’ve called this horse] I don’t even need a birthday

Moses: I get it, you don’t want your surprise no more, don’t worry I’ll cancel what I had planned, there’s no need to cancel your whole birthday too, like

Edie: I don’t want any of it

Moses: I’m still not forcing you

Edie: I’m not a child, I don’t need a fucking birthday party, it’s so irrelevant

Moses: I wasn’t giving you one, I was giving you your own fucking ‘van like an adult

Edie: Yeah, cancel it

Moses: I am

Edie: Good, don’t waste your money

Moses: It ain’t ever wasted on you, that’s why I’ll transfer it instead, do what you want with it

Edie: You were never going to let me live with you, I don’t want the money either, none of it

Moses: Yeah I was, ask your mammy if you don’t believe us

Edie: No, you were going to put me in my own caravan, I don’t need to ask anyone

Moses: Because she were carrying on and on about you having your own room, I was going to put all your music stuff in it when her back was turned

Edie: Why could you just not get a two-bedroom ‘van?

Moses: I thought you’d like having one to decorate yourself, but what do I know

Edie: Forget about it

Moses: I have now

Edie: We aren’t the same at all, not even close

Edie: I was wrong about everything

Moses: You’re wrong about that for a start

Edie: I wanted to be a family, to have a room at my daddy’s, that’s it

Moses: No, you don’t want to live with me, you never did

Edie: Liar

Moses: You’re the liar, you said you wanted to sleep in my bed, that’s why I didn’t bother myself with 2

Edie: Is that all you cared about

Edie: You didn’t want me cluttering up your life, with my things, my presence anywhere but your bed

Moses: Christ alive, you are my life and what I cared about was sharing mine with you, it was your mammy talking of space, she said no unless I got some more

Edie: So you went with the more expensive option

Moses: Like I said, I thought you’d have fun with your own ‘van to play in

Edie: No

Moses: You’ve got a music room at your mammy’s, I only wanted living with me to be as good, I was going to find out how to build it into a proper studio, that’s all

Edie: I don’t care about things, that’s not what it was about, I don’t need you to give me endless gifts

Moses: I’m not sorry for trying to give you the nice things you deserve

Edie: It’s thoughtful of you 

Moses: Don’t patronise me

Edie: Fine, it’s thoughtful this time but all it reminds me of is every time it wasn’t, that’s the truth

Moses: Jesus

Edie: I hate it, I’m not sorry

Moses: You hate me, you hate my culture, you hate how I show I care about you

Edie: No I do not

Moses: That’s what you’re saying

Edie: Because I’d rather you showed up than sent me money or things? 

Moses: I do show up and when I can’t I want you to know that you’re loved and I’m thinking of you, I’m after making it up a bit that I’m not always there how some dads get to be, why’s that a fucking crime?

Edie: I’m sorry, I can’t help how it makes us feel

Edie: I’m ungrateful, you said so, so just don’t even try, I’m not worth it

Moses: You’re cruel, but I’m to blame for that too, everything’s my fault, you said so yourself

Edie: Why’d I say that, it’s clearly not true

Moses: Forget it, something else you’ve told us to do cos you’re blatantly of the mind yous can tell me what to now, many times as you like

Edie: That’s because that’s what I want, the only thing I want

Edie: You’d never tell me it were impossible before, nothing

Moses: So have it

Edie: So mean it

Moses: I can’t just mean something different the second you decide it’s what you want

Edie: There’s time, we can

Moses: Time for you to reject me, you did

Edie: That shouldn’t be a sentence we can even say

Moses: I know, that’s why all day I’ve tried not to be upset about it, not hold nothing against you

Edie: and I tried to be normal but I couldn’t

Edie: we shouldn’t have done it, it made both of those things and more impossible

Moses: I won’t do it again, I couldn’t take feeling like that a second time

Edie: I really am sorry, you know, more than I can put in words

Edie: I feel like shit too, if that helps

Moses: I heard you the first time

Edie: Don’t hate me

Moses: I don’t

Moses: I couldn’t, I love you too much

Edie: I never want to make you feel like that again either, I can’t stand that it happened the once

Moses: I’ll find somewhere else to put it, I should’ve known you couldn’t handle it

Edie: Don’t say that

Moses: It’s the truth

Edie: Wow

Moses: I wish it weren’t but it is, kid

Edie: Fuck you

Moses: What are you getting so angry for?

Edie: Don’t talk to me and you are banned from seeing me

Moses: Have it your fucking way, everything else is

Edie: If I can’t be loved that’s all your fucking fault

Moses: All I’ve ever done is love you

Edie: You take it away, you’ve never outright said it but now you have, now there’s no denying it

Moses: You took it away first, all you’ve said

Moses: I’m no father, I’m banned from seeing you, and the rest

Edie: You’re meant to be an adult, the adult here

Moses: I’m not allowed to be upset then, that’s grand

Edie: You’re meant to fix it

Moses: I don’t know how, you’ve turned everything around

Moses: you wanted this, now you don’t and you won’t give me a second to even try and catch up, all you’re doing is being mean to me

Edie: You wish you didn’t even love me

Moses: I wish I didn’t so much it’s made you hate me

Edie: I don’t

Moses: You do

Edie: No

Edie: I want you to love me unconditionally, that’s all I’ve ever wanted

Moses: What conditions have I ever put on you? I let you do what you want even though you’re a girl

Edie: That’s the problem, this adds conditions

Moses: No it don’t, you can’t stand that it happened, it won’t again

Moses: it’s done with

Edie: You don’t believe that, be honest

Moses: I believe you, how upset you are, even though you don’t care that I am

Edie: You just left

Edie: you didn’t say goodbye, you didn’t say anything about what happened

Edie: and you told my mammy I was sulking

Moses: You wouldn’t talk to us, it was for the best I left before I said things I didn’t mean

Edie: You didn’t say anything either

Moses: I was giving you time to come to me, I didn’t expect you to take what was left of the day and go mute at me or bring your brother out so you could avoid us

Edie: I invited whoever wanted to come, not just him

Edie: and that was when I was planning

Moses: I didn’t wanna rush you no more than I did force you, use that was, when you reckon I’ve done worse

Edie: I haven’t said that and I’m not going to, get that out of your head

Edie: It was like, you couldn’t even look at me anymore

Moses: Because if I’d have looked at you I wouldn’t have been able to stop myself and you needed me to

Edie: I didn’t ask you to stop

Moses: You are, and you have been since it happened

Edie: Because if you’re going to treat me like this then I can’t

Edie: having you care about me is more important than that

Moses: I was treating you as nice as I know how to, being more careful with you than I’ve ever been with anyone before

Moses: and you still reacted like that, felt sick about it, hated me for it

Edie: It wasn’t that I felt sick about

Edie: it was after, I keep saying

Edie: You tried to humiliate me in front of my little brother, you left me out on my own when you knew I was upset

Moses: I was upset too, I keep saying

Moses: you’re the only person who’s ever rejected us and the last I reckoned would

Edie: Then let’s go back, to when that wasn’t a possibility

Moses: I don’t want to, I want it to not be a possibility because you want me too

Edie: Daddy, come on

Edie: It was a disaster

Moses: Everyone’s first time is

Moses: [tell her some stories of yours from kisses to whenever you lost your virginity like see]

Moses: I can fix that, let me

Edie: I meant the fallout

Moses: There isn’t any if we talk to each other, I should’ve made you and I’ve the knowing to next time

Edie: But will we, or would this just happen again

Moses: Come on, baby, please

Moses: give us a chance, don’t I deserve one more?

Edie: Do you want me or do you just want your streak back

Moses: You know it’s you

Moses: I want you so bad you didn’t even need to touch me to be shown how much

Edie: That wasn’t just because of where we were

Moses: It’s because you’re special, it’s never happened nowhere else

Edie: Why?

Moses: What do you mean why?

Edie: I mean

Edie: I’m not special, I didn’t do anything

Moses: You are to me, it wouldn’t matter if you did nothing every time, it’s how you make us feel

Edie: It matters to me

Moses: I love you, I’ll always love you no matter what

Edie: and I’ll always love you too

Moses: I didn’t mean to hurt you, I was hurting thinking I’d lost you

Edie: You can’t lose me, only if you push me away

Moses: You were and I couldn’t handle it

Edie: I didn’t know what to say, I still don’t

Moses: Say I can spend your birthday with you, I won’t bring no presents ‘cept myself

Edie: You promise?

Moses: Promise

Edie: Okay

Moses: I’ll miss you

Edie: I’ve missed you

Moses: I’ll light a candle and wish to start the day over, be less of a cunt to you

Edie: I wanted it to be perfect for you

Moses: I know and I ruined it

Edie: Me too

Moses: If I could see you more I wouldn’t lose my mind when I do, it’ll be different when I’m home, better

Edie: How’s the tattoo?

Moses: [send her a pic]

Moses: How’s your [wherever she got pierced]?

Edie: I’m glad you’ve not tried to scratch it off

Edie: I can’t say I’ve given it any thought

Moses: You’re going nowhere, permanent like you wrote

Moses: did you take it out, you can tell me

Edie: No, it’s still in

Edie: I feel so stupid, today was meant to be the start of a new chapter

Moses: It’s my fault

Edie: It was an equal effort

Moses: Nah, you’re saying that to make me feel better

Edie: Weird of me to start now after being such a bitch

Moses: Your birthday is going to be perfect

Edie: It is?

Moses: Whatever it takes, I’ll be making a deal with god or the devil the night before, might hedge my bets and ask both for favours

Edie: You’d risk that for me

Moses: Before you was born I don’t reckon I even had a soul to gamble with, it’s yours and already on the line for you

Edie: I love you, I know you love me too, I feel it, always

Moses: I’ve no other reason to be here

Edie: You’re mine, I’ll keep you safe, do better

Moses: If you don’t want to be touched, I’ll not touch you

Moses: you’re safe with me

Edie: I did want to, you didn’t make me do anything

Moses: Your hair made me

Edie: I didn’t realise how alike it would make us look

Moses: Nor did I ‘til I couldn’t stop looking at you

Edie: Everyone knew I was your daughter

Moses: It’s right they do, wherever we are

Moses: you belong to us, inside and out

Edie: You’ve been inside me, I still can’t believe that happened

Moses: Not all of me yet, but enough I’ll have to touch myself to the sight of you in my head every night to be fit for anything else in the morning, yeah

Edie: Am I still there, on your fingers, even a little?

Moses: Can’t you still taste yourself in your mouth from mine?

Edie: I needed more, I didn’t want to stop

Moses: Me either but you’re not broken in like other women are, I have to remember to take it slow with you

Edie: No, I want to be like them

Moses: You don’t

Edie: Why not

Moses: I didn’t love them

Edie: You love me no matter what

Moses: And how I treated them would hurt you because you love me

Edie: Tell me

Moses: I wasn’t nice how I am to you

Moses: [why yes, it is time for a rough sex style overshare, just everything we can possibly imagine because lord knows how many ladies he’s slept with by this age, going into all the graphic details as per, being just horrible with how he’s treating these gals it’s not even hot it’s just derogatory]

Edie: That’s what they wanted

Moses: Yeah

Edie: And that’s what you wanted too

Moses: Right, they were there asking to be used and I did

Edie: So how can you change what you want that much?

Moses: I’m a changed man for you, told you

Edie: I think you’ll miss it

Moses: You don’t miss [something she kind of likes] when you’ve got [something that’s a fave]

Edie: You’ll get bored

Moses: I didn’t of your mammy, she did of me

Edie: You know it’s never been that

Moses: I know I’m not getting bored of you

Edie: You will if you treat me like I’m boring

Moses: We only have be careful at first, ‘til you’re used to me

Moses: it ain’t forever

Edie: Did you do those things to my mammy?

Moses: [tell her what you did because again, we love an overshare]

Edie: Do you find it weird that you and Ronan have both slept with her?

Moses: We both slept with Django’s mammy first, he can’t help but follow my lead, I’ve always lived exactly as I’m after, most can only envy it

Edie: I’m pretty sure she slept with him first, they were friends

Moses: She fought wanting to sleep with me but I could tell she did

Edie: Obviously

Moses: Point is, Ronan’ll have taken more of my leftovers, I know, I just haven’t bothered myself to ask who or when

Edie: I miss him, it’s a shame they didn’t work out

Moses: What’s to miss?

Edie: I don’t know, it was just nice having him around

Moses: Come and live with me, that’ll be nicer, promise

Edie: I don’t know

Moses: Why not?

Edie: I’ll just visit instead

Moses: Talk to us, why don’t you want to?

Edie: The idea is tainted now

Moses: It don’t have to be

Edie: I want to stay at home

Moses: Long as you know you can have a home with me

Moses: your original idea was to stay and both of us take care of each other

Edie: The trusts not there now, for either of us

Moses: I trust you, but fine, you don’t trust your daddy

Edie: My ideas were stupid

Moses: No they weren’t, you’re too smart for that

Moses: I’ll say no more about it though, you’ve made up your mind and that’s probably another smart idea itself

Edie: You don’t have to worry about talking to me, just say when you’re back

Moses: Oh sure, not as if I want to talk to yous or anything

Edie: Sometimes you get something and find out it’s not what you wanted, right

Moses: I don’t, you’re speaking for yourself there

Edie: Well, lucky you

Moses: You’ve no need to be scared

Edie: I’m not 

Moses: You’re not going to be boring, even if you live to be 133 like I’ve plans to

Edie: I don’t even know if I wanna live to 33

Moses: Don’t say that

Edie: What’s the point, seriously

Moses: You’re my point, what would I do without you?

Edie: You can have another point

Moses: Or I can go [an geographically appropriate way of killing himself for where he is rn, whether that’s a river or whatever it is] and I would

Edie: I never said I was going to do anything

Edie: Una would haunt me, if you can haunt other dead people

Moses: I’d haunt you too

Moses: there’s no replacing you, no more talk like that

Edie: You could though, Liam’s ma would really have to be going some to be in with a shot

Moses: Shut your mouth, I could never

Edie: Are you scared of death?

Moses: You dying, give a fuck about what happens to me

Edie: I’ll try not to

Moses: Mind you try your hardest for my sake

Edie: ‘Course

Moses: I’d be lost without your visits, can’t wait for ‘em to start

Edie: You’re a nerd

Moses: Liar

Edie: Sadly not

Moses: Pathological, can’t stop, look at yous

Edie: Shut up, loser

Moses: Make me

Edie: Yeah, you wish

Moses: You wish you weren’t all talk, you mean

Moses: I’ll get over it

Edie: Oh good

Edie: You can stop annoying me then

Moses: Night then

Edie: Bye

Moses: [do go because you always rudely will haha]

[punkscowardschampions]

Modie Pt.2

Edie: 3s are sacred

Edie: double has to be lucky for you, I reckon

Moses: I feel it, sure

Edie: Mines mammy’s lucky number, we’re golden, like

Moses: A sacred birthday you’re gonna have

Edie: You’re treating me like I am

Moses: You are, it’s a shame I’ve not got 13 fingers to touch you with

Edie: I can think of other ways we can count that high

Moses: Go on

Edie: If you think you can make it last, if I can

Edie: it’s a little like holding your breath, holding back

Moses: For you I can

Edie: You want it to be perfect for me

Moses: The birthday girl, my princess

Edie: I know it will be everything, I trust you

Moses: I’ll look after you, be gentle

Edie: You always have

Edie: when you trust me, trust yourself, you can try not for a change

Moses: Feral, wasn’t it you said

Edie: Yeah, just like you’re being right now

Moses: Are yous going to bite your daddy’s tongue again when that day comes?

Edie: Stop me biting it clean off

Moses: I won’t talk, that’s settled

Moses: you’ll still understand all my meanings, my body’ll speak instead

Edie: I can’t hurt you either

Edie: not permanent, just for a second, just the good kind

Moses: Swallow it, you’ll want it inside you like where you grew in your mammy’s stomach

Edie: That’s where I want you

Moses: You’ll be after every part of us everywhere, I know

Edie: Don’t you want to be all over me?

Moses: It’s a need I’ve got the same as you

Edie: You’ve need of your tongue the same as me then

Edie: find a different way to have me swallow you

Moses: There’s other ways I ain’t about to ignore and you won’t be able to

Edie: [a picture of your mouth open and tongue out like it can happen now]

Moses: Tell me what you reckon I’ll taste like

Edie: [a very thought out if unhinged reply because you’ve obviously thought of it before right now]

Edie: What does it taste like really?

Moses: [Give her a realer but still childlike comparison, like to a food but in a nicer way than I’m sure it really does, idk haven’t tasted it and shan’t]

Edie: I want that stuck in my throat instead of the sounds I don’t make, that’s all I know

Moses: You’ll make plenty, I’m not going to stop ‘til none of ‘em are stuck, I’ll free every one

Edie: I think I’m still scared, what I might say, what the noises say on their own

Moses: I’m not scared of hearing them no matter what they might say, trust me and yourself, you told me I should

Edie: There’s nothing I could say, ever, that would make you stop loving me?

Moses: We’re keeping no secrets, neither of us want that

Edie: I hate feeling like I don’t know you, when those moments happen

Moses: You’ve the proper knowing of me, baby

Edie: I know you inside

Edie: but I want to know what you’re doing, where you are, all the time

Moses: The minute this job finishes where I’m gonna be is with you

Edie: You can take me on jobs here, all of them

Edie: I’ll watch you, I won’t distract you

Moses: I’ll take you on holiday, to the sun

Moses: let it touch you

Edie: I’ll go so freckly

Moses: And let me kiss all them

Edie: We can go out, when everyone else is having their siestas, be alone wherever we go

Moses: Yeah, we’ll feel like we own the whole place without me needing to, saves the cash to spoil you

Edie: I want spoiling with kisses instead, please

Edie: everywhere and all over but especially on the lips, all the time, like I’ve always wanted from my daddy

Moses: Why not both? Money and love

Edie: I’m just saying, if I’ve got to choose

Moses: You don’t, no daughter of mine

Moses: [pop off about all the designer brands Billie wears and you’re gonna buy this gal, getting into it like she’s a baby or a doll for you to dress up but you’re making her look swag lol because you’ve clearly been this bitch since she was a baby]

Edie: I like that you don’t care, about me dressing girly

Moses: You’re my girl whether you wear a bow or no, your mammy dresses how she wants

Edie: You’re not insecure

Moses: Nah, I’ve no reason

Edie: You think I’m pretty whatever, you don’t need me to dress up to make up for anything

Moses: Everyone thinks you’re pretty who looks

Edie: I just care what you see

Moses: [send the pics she’s sent you back to her like this is what I see]

Edie: 😳😳😳

Moses: I wanna see how red you go

Edie: I’ll hold my breath again

Edie: You’ve forgotten

Moses: That’s different than 😳

Edie: I won’t pass out if you make me too 😳, will I?

Moses: You might

Edie: Oh

Moses: What sort of oh?

Edie: Good sort

Moses: Good answer

Edie: Can I ask you a question, daddy?

Moses: ‘Course, how else are you to have them answered unless you do

Edie: How many people do you think you’ve slept with, roughly

Moses: I’d say [a frankly obscene number cos he’s really whored around when he’s had the chance to] maybe

Edie: Wow

Moses: Are you upset to hear how high of a number it is?

Edie: No

Edie: not upset

Moses: Impressed?

Edie: I suppose I have more questions now

Edie: do you remember any one person from the next or just a general good vs bad experience?

Moses: It’s like anything, some are more memorable than others

Moses: your mammy for one

Edie: Yeah, how many proper girlfriends have you had?

Moses: Her

Edie: You’re trying to make me cry

Moses: No, but she is the only woman worth counting as mine, besides you when you become a woman

Edie: [show him you’re crying anyway because just that gal]

Moses: I’d probably have married her if she’d been of the same mind, but she weren’t

Edie: but she never has either

Moses: I never had her, not how I wanted

Edie: I’m sorry, my sad is making you sad

Moses: I’ve got you

Edie: I belong to you

Moses: It isn’t sad, we’re not, you make me happier than any of the [number of peeps he’s slept with]

Edie: I better had

Moses: Aren’t you flattered to be my favourite of every girl I’ve been inside? The only I really want to bother myself with more than doing that

Edie: Of course I am

Moses: Say you’d still love us even if the number was doubled

Edie: Are you planning to double it by my birthday?

Moses: I haven’t plans to add to it at all

Edie: Don’t say that, I think you mean ever

Moses: I do

Edie: [not the quietest whimper audio of all time]

Moses: Give me all of you and I’ll give you all of me, to yourself, for as long a time as you want it

Edie: I don’t want anything else, I love you, that’s never going to change, where would I go, and why

Moses: I love you so fucking much I wouldn’t be able to stand it if you didn’t too

Edie: I was so afraid you would reject me, I don’t know where life would take me if you turned me away

Moses: I’d die before disowning you

Edie: I need you to live forever, need to be with you, your girl or I’ll die 

Moses: I don’t know that I can live forever but don’t worry yourself about anything happening to your daddy, I’m strong

Edie: Don’t go where I can’t follow, no prison, promise 

Moses: I don’t get caught, I’m smart too, like

Edie: You’re the best, that’s why everyone takes you from me 

Moses: They might give it a lash but they can’t

Edie: Tell me again you only want me, it hasn’t sunk in 

Moses: You’re all I’ve ever wanted, that’s why I made you

Edie: Make me again, make me into who you need 

Moses: I’ve got loads still to teach you

Edie: I’m most excited for that 

Edie: even more than the horse 

Moses: Long as I’m forgiven, I’m happy

Edie: I was so mean, wasn’t I? You were so upset 😭 

Moses: You’re crueler than your mammy can be, you take after me

Edie: I’d be nice to you, if you were here

Moses: And if you’re nice, I’m nice

Edie: You don’t like being mean, I don’t think you’re cruel at all 

Moses: Not to you

Edie: Who to?

Moses: I don’t like being walked over and there’s plenty who’ll try that on if you allow it

Edie: You have to protect yourself, your family family 

Moses: Look at my brother, my sister, happens too easy if you don’t watch out

Moses: don’t you ever treat us like that

Edie: I’d need to be in love with someone else 

Moses: And you only love me

Edie: No one else wants me like you do

Moses: They would if you let them

Edie: Nope

Moses: You don’t know how you look, can’t see yourself the way you are

Edie: Liam doesn’t want me

Moses: Your mammy says different, I told you

Edie: She’s not there when it’s just us

Edie: she thinks I’m like her and could make anything I want happen but I can’t 

Moses: You could, there’s nothing I wouldn’t give you and I’d let you do even more

Edie: You’re different 

Edie: maybe I’ve just had years of practice with you

Moses: It don’t matter what I am, you’ve just said you want Liam, maybe practise is all you reckon I’m here for

Edie: People don’t practise with their family, that’s not real that’s porn bullshit

Edie: you know that’s not true

Moses: You telling me you’d make him want you if you could is true

Edie: I was telling you he doesn’t 

Moses: You wish he did though, lucky you’ve your candles to blow out

Edie: Don’t be like this

Moses: It’s your doing not mine, sorry I’m not thick

Edie: I haven’t done anything, nothing was a lie, why would I pretend this of all things 

Moses: Because the lad’s got no interest, you have and you would

Edie: You’ve slept with [the number] girls

Moses: Don’t put that on me, it’s in the past

Moses: From your own mouth you like Liam now

Edie: I’ve never not liked Liam, I’ve never said I don’t 

Edie: but this is different to anything else, come on, I’m not from him

Moses: You’ll have said you don’t cos it’s what I was after hearing

Edie: Then why am I not now?

Moses: And I told your mammy you don’t so you’ve made me look stupid to her

Edie: She knows I like Liam, why would she be asking you that

Moses: She wasn’t asking nothing she was calling you a whore and I defended you

Edie: She’d never call me that

Moses: Not with that word, but it was her meaning

Edie: You’re calling me one and I haven’t done anything

Moses: Why would I call you anything without reason?

Edie: You’re not listening to me, you just want to think it

Moses: If I weren’t listening, how’d I hear you say you’re after some boy who don’t want you?

Edie: You want me to wait for you forever

Edie: Do you know how long it’s been since you actually last saw me?

Moses: [tell her like you’re so offended cos yes of course I do but be wrong because you do not]

Edie: No

Edie: you came back here then but you didn’t see me

Edie: [a time that is clearly longer ago, whenever we’re saying]

Moses: If you loved me you’d wait twice that, you would wait forever not think of throwing yourself at him when I’m away

Edie: If you loved me you’d bother to see me

Moses: I do see you

Edie: Not [the time he thought he had], not since [the actual time] 

Edie: even though you’ve meant to and said you would, how many times since?

Moses: And when’s that drug dealer troubled himself to see your sisters, eh? You could do loads worse than me as your daddy

Edie: It wasn’t me that started this

Moses: What do you expect? How am I meant to not be jealous?

Edie: Why would you be jealous, ever, of anyone

Moses: He don’t work, he can spend all the time he wants with you, that’s bad enough without you laying it on with a trowel how much you like to

Moses: without accusing me of not bothering nor loving you

Edie: I didn’t mean that, you upset me

Moses: You upset me

Edie: I’m sorry

Moses: Whatever, if you’re going to be this ungrateful I won’t trouble myself half as much

Edie: Wow

Moses: You have no idea how much I really love you

Edie: So you’re just going to stop, you’re not allowed to do that

Moses: My own mammy can’t look at me the way she used to because of you and what did I care? What do I care what gets said to me when I’m on jobs about it, I don’t

Edie: You can’t say you wanted me and blame me for being born

Moses: I don’t blame you, you’re a girl you can’t help yourself but act up for boys

Edie: The only person I’ve acted up for is you and now I wish I hadn’t

Moses: Don’t wish that

Edie: How can I not? Look what it’s made you think of me

Moses: It’s the thoughts of him, you and him

Edie: There’s nothing to think about

Moses: Stop liking him, you haven’t a need to, I’m coming back

Edie: I’ll see you when you’re back

Moses: I’ll never leave you again

Edie: You have to work, your daddy will need you again somewhere else

Moses: There’s work local, I’ll only do those jobs

Edie: You don’t need to promise anything

Moses: I was trying to sort your future but what’s the point if I lose you in the now

Edie: I’m not going anywhere

Moses: Your mammy did, I weren’t good enough for her, was I?

Edie: No, it’s not that simple

Moses: I can’t lose you, it’s that simple

Edie: You won’t

Edie: however mean you are

Moses: I shouldn’t have been

Edie: It’s done now

Moses: No, let me undo it

Edie: You can’t

Moses: Please

Edie: I wish you could, I’d like to unhear it, not know it in my bones

Moses: You should know in your bones I didn’t mean it

Edie: It wouldn’t be that easy to say, that on the tip of your tongue but I understand

Edie: I see it, you’re not wrong

Moses: I know what to say to hurt people

Edie: And that’s the truth

Edie: but I don’t have to be like this, I’ll do better, don’t worry

Moses: I wouldn’t tell everyone you were the best thing I ever did if that wasn’t true

Edie: And your mammy hates that I exist

Moses: She hates me, how I behave, how my daddy does

Edie: You would hate it too, if you were her

Moses: I don’t know how to do better, I’m not as good as you

Edie: I’m just saying, you would hate your daddy if you were your mammy

Edie: it isn’t right for her to hate her child though

Moses: I’m not the child she wished for, she didn’t get as lucky as I did with you

Edie: Who’s her favourite?

Moses: [his sister]

Edie: She’s yours too

Moses: You’re mine

Edie: I don’t count

Moses: You always do, and I miss you so bad that I’ve been a prick

Edie: I’ll forgive you

Moses: When?

Edie: Now

Moses: I don’t wanna be here but that ain’t your fault

Edie: You want the money, and to help your daddy

Moses: I want to wake up and it’s the day before your birthday then I’ll be able to come home

Edie: Me too

Edie: but you’re to have yours first or we’ll not be in synch 

Moses: How am I going to spend mine without you?

Edie: [list the drinks/drugs he did before but in a fun way this time even though it’s still giving sad times, we know]

Moses: [talk about how long it would take for you to get from wherever you are to Dublin and back in a day and therefore how long you would have to spend with her if you did that, like or I come and see you instead]

Edie: You don’t want to spend that long driving on your birthday

Moses: I want to see you, baby

Edie: Still?

Moses: I need to make up for how mean I was, get yous to proper forgive me

Edie: Of course I’ll see you, if you really want to spend the day with me

Moses: I’m not after any other presents or wishes

Edie: I’ll still make you one though

Moses: Yeah?

Edie: That’s tradition too

Moses: Think about what you want us to do together

Edie: You, it’s your special day, silly

Moses: It’ll already be special and I’m getting what I’ve asked for spending the day with you

Edie: Alright, I’ll think of something fun for us

Moses: Good girl

Edie: We’ll buy a cake, I can’t waste any more eggs

Moses: And a horse

Edie: Can we? 

Edie: I’ll be a pro by the time you’re back again

Moses: Yeah, I’m starting a new tradition that you get a present on my birthday too

Edie: You’ll not call us ungrateful?

Moses: Come on, no throwing back at us things I didn’t mean

Edie: Sorry

Edie: just don’t spoil me if you think I’m spoilt, I don’t want to be

Moses: You’re loved, that’s different

Edie: Okay

Moses: Nothing and nobody’ll get in my way this time

Moses: [and tell her a time you’ll be in Dublin to pick her up]

Edie: 🤞

Edie: Looking forward to it

Moses: I promise

Moses: [and a new time that’s like an hour earlier than he just said or something because he can’t wait]

Edie: You can’t wait to blow out your candles

Moses: What flavour cake do you want?

Edie: [whatever flavour, that’s his favourite, clearly]

Moses: But [whatever flavour is her fave or he thinks is if he’s wrong again] is your favourite

Edie: I like watching you eat more

Moses: I’d still eat [her fave flavour of cake]

Edie: It’s better if it’s your favourite, you’ll enjoy it the most

Moses: I’ve told you, you’re my favourite and there’s nothing you can’t have or I wouldn’t do to make you happy

Edie: Let’s get both then

Moses: Grand idea

Edie: Who would you be married to, if you’d been matched with someone?

Moses: [going through some options, whoever those gals may be, and telling her where they are now aka who they are married to, how many kids they have, if they’ve let themselves go/hate their husbands or are happy with said men and if you’ve slept with any of them since they got married etc etc, just oversharing always]

Edie: You know everyone

Moses: You’ve no say but to, everyone’s in everyone else’s face, like

Edie: Do you like it?

Moses: I’ve never known different, do you reckon you’ll like it?

Edie: Everybody already knows me

Edie: it’s just making it mutual, I guess

Moses: [teach her some more gypsy lingo just for fun]

Edie: I’ll ask mammy to teach me, something to do 

Moses: Go shopping too, dress up nice for my birthday

Moses: I’ll send yous some money

Edie: What kind of nice?

Moses: There’s only one kind, that’s expensive

Moses: [and do transfer her loads of money into her bank because you’d have the deets saved]

Edie: THAT expensive or is some of that for the others?

Moses: It’s all yours, I can send more for the others if they need but I thought we’d be spending the day just us

Edie: I don’t mind being just us

Moses: [telling her the designer labels he likes for if she wants to match him because he’s deffo that father when she was younger]

Edie: The others will be jealous

Moses: You can help us pick what to buy for their birthdays and christmas in Junior’s case or he’ll have a long wait

Edie: Gutted 😏

Moses: Or make him some more bin [whatever treat she threw away], like

Edie: By then, I’ll be allowed back in the kitchen to make their birthday cakes

Edie: it’s funny, how close mammy managed to get all her firstborns birthdays to their daddies, I doubt it was planned

Moses: I wanted you to be born on my birthday but you had other plans yourself

Edie: Cutting at impossibility there, surely

Moses: Aren’t I known for making the impossible happen?

Edie: You might be

Moses: Might, is it? You could sound more convinced

Edie: I’m willing to be

Moses: All you have to do is let me

Edie: I am

Moses: Good

Edie: You’re trying, I know

Moses: You can feel it, can’t you? How hard I’m willing to try

Edie: I can, daddy

Moses: I love you, don’t ever doubt that again

Edie: I know you do, I promise

Moses: Say it back

Edie: I love you, always

Moses: More than anything

Edie: More than anyone

Moses: What colour hair will you have?

Edie: Can’t you guess?

Moses: I want you to say it

Edie: Dark, like yours

Moses: Cut a bit off and post it when you have, you won’t trust yourself with scissors when you’re in front of me

Edie: Sounds more like YOU don’t trust me 🔪🔪🩸

Moses: Your hands’ll shake, you don’t wanna lose too much

Edie: Just a little, behind the ear or the nape of my neck

Moses: Where it’ll stay our secret

Edie: I knew you’d like it

Moses: I’ll try not to eat it, like the letter you promised

Edie: Only smell it, you don’t want a hairball, even if it’s mine

Moses: I want to put every part of you in my mouth

Edie: Jesus

Edie: every part?

Moses: All of you

Edie: You know it’s only you, don’t you

Moses: I need to know it, you’ll have to convince me

Edie: Touche…

Edie: I will

Moses: Let’s not fight again, ever

Edie: It feels like my heart rips every time, in a new place

Moses: I’ll mend your heart like I did [some toy she had]

Edie: You’re so good at everything

Edie: there’s nothing you can’t do, I’ve always thought that

Moses: I can’t stand when we’re not together, but that’ll be in the past soon enough

Edie: When did you miss me most

Edie: like, what age

Moses: Now

Edie: Right this second

Moses: Yeah

Edie: That hurts too, almost as much as fighting

Moses: Where does it hurt most?

Edie: You know

Moses: Tell your daddy where

Edie: But I’m embarrassed

Moses: Do you want to show me instead?

Edie: Nu-uh

Edie: I can’t, you’re not allowed to look there

Moses: I’m allowed to look anywhere, you’re my baby

Edie: In between my legs?

Moses: If it hurts, you need me to

Edie: I can’t take that back, if I show you

Moses: Why are you thinking like that?

Edie: I’m saying it’s a big step

Moses: You can trust me

Edie: Do you need it too

Moses: You know I do

Edie: [show him]

Edie: be nice

Moses: [show her to be nice and so she trusts you back]

Edie: I

Edie: I’m scared, the good kind

Moses: It’ll only hurt the first time, the good kind

Edie: Tell me how it’ll feel for you

Moses: I can’t, there’s no words for that

Edie: Think about it, you can show me that

Moses: [do because ofc you will]

Edie: I can’t believe I did that to you, just me

Moses: You’ve got more power than you realise

Edie: I can’t look away

Moses: Don’t even blink

Edie: But you want me to move, don’t you?

Moses: I’m not that cruel I’d force you to keep still

Edie: You shouldn’t be capable of being that cute when you’re that

Edie: 😳

Moses: You can move, for me

Edie: [demonstrate, obvs]

Edie: like this?

Moses: Like you want to get caught

Edie: I might, I don’t know who’s here, barely where I am anymore

Moses: Or what they’ll hear you say

Edie: You want me to be loud for you

Moses: I’m going to make you scream, the good kind

Edie: We’re going to have to do it when everyone at the site is sleeping then

Moses: I’ve got a big hand and you’ve got a little mouth, don’t worry

Edie: I think you should be more concerned, about being overheard doing what you’re doing to me

Moses: Why should I?

Edie: You like it, don’t you

Edie: The risk

Moses: We’ll never be bored how we usually are, I won’t let you and you won’t let me

Edie: And we’ll only almost get caught

Moses: There’s many almosts for us

Edie: I remember, you’re an expert at pulling out

Moses: Only when I want to

Edie: You don’t want any babies

Moses: Remind me of that when you’re testing my will

Edie: 😋

Edie: We’ll be good

Moses: You’ll be the best I’ve ever had, I know it

Edie: You made me, to be exactly what you want

Moses: I did

Edie: No one else has ruined me for you

Moses: No one else will touch you or I’ll ruin them

Edie: You’re so protective

Moses: I gave you my name to protect you even when I’m away

Edie: I wish Django had it

Moses: Everyone knows you belong to me, I’ve never been ashamed like my cousin is

Edie: I know, it makes me sad

Edie: he’d not want it now anyway, so it’s only me it bothers

Moses: His mammy should’ve stayed with me, but then, if she had I might not have you

Edie: You’d not

Edie: you can’t should’ve all that

Moses: Right, it bothers me too is all I’m saying

Edie: It should, I don’t know how it couldn’t but

Moses: But I do have you and I wouldn’t change that

Edie: You can be sad, she was only a kid, it’s sad

Edie: I didn’t think you were together though

Moses: We weren’t, she wasn’t after being with anybody like that when she could have a go at being with everyone, that’s putting it nice

Edie: Sure, makes sense

Moses: I tried looking after her but she wouldn’t be told, listen to a word I said

Edie: She’d bigger issues

Moses: Her mammy for one, that woman was the biggest disgrace you ever saw

Edie: Yeah, ‘til she disappeared 

Moses: Did Django a favour, he was better off with yours

Edie: She is the best

Edie: I’ll never be that good

Moses: You are that good, you’re from her

Moses: the best of us both

Edie: She was barely older than me, I don’t know how she did it

Moses: You could, you have it in you the same, the difference is you’ll not be forced to, you’ve got more say than she had, in more things

Edie: Poor baby mammy

Moses: It’s sad

Edie: Now I am

Moses: You aren’t allowed to be when I’m this far from you and there’s nothing I can do

Edie: Sorry, sorry

Edie: There’s nothing I can do, so it’s got to be fine

Moses: My poor baby

Edie: I’ll pretend you’re here

Moses: [call her so you can make comforting noises down this phone]

Edie: [doing such a happy noise about it]

Moses: [start making up some kind of bedtime story vibe, because I’m sure it’s late enough by now, how both of our fathers did using characters from when she was little how both our fathers did, soz guys for once again corrupting something really pure]

Edie: [just listening and all you can hear is her breathing, not even interrupting because being that well behaved about it energy]

Moses: [I dread to think what this story is about but there’s y’all and her horse she’s gonna have and 2 birthday cakes with a wish for each of them for sure, just living our best lives, it would be adorable if he was just her loving father]

Edie: [truly, soz it’s disgustang]

Moses: [he’ll be going on and on until she falls asleep at least so that’ll spare us any more feral antics for a minute haha, do you wanna skip to his bday? That’s the next big thing for y’all but idk how big of a jump it is from where we are now? I suppose we could always hop back if we think of anything we wanna add before anyway]

Edie: [this is what we get for not plotting jali on a timeframe from the off lol, his bday is the literal last day of sept so it may still be a while away but we could probably still skip, why not]

Moses: [yolo, we’re silly geese and we do what we want, even if it’s a big jump it’s the first time y’all are seeing each other in person so you’d be limited what feral incest antics you can do from afar, it’d only be escalating what y’all have already been up to and being extra about missing each other so I figure we can, like I say, if we think of anything specific we wanna add between now and then we can always jump back after like we did with jali]

Edie: [you want me to message him as he’s on the way?]

Moses: [go ahead girl]

Edie: 🎁🎈🎉🎂🥳🎁🎈🎉🎂🥳🎁🎈🎉🎂🥳

Edie: [voice note of you singing him happy birthday]

Moses: [Tell her where you are geographically and how insanely fast you’re driving as per so she knows how long away you are]

Edie: You’re really coming

Moses: You really thought I wouldn’t?

Edie: I just can’t believe you’ll really be here

Moses: Get ready, I’ll be there before you know

Edie: I feel dizzy

Moses: Before you’ve had any sugar

Edie: You’re 🧁🎂🍭🍬🍫🍩🍪 on crack

Edie: I’ll try not to fall up the stairs 

Moses: Says you, the sweetest

Edie: I can’t wait to tell mammy you’re really on your way

Edie: I could scream

Moses: You can scream, long as you send me that audio too

Edie: You’ll have to pull over, can’t have that

Moses: We can’t have no delays

Edie: I’ve got too much planned

Moses: Tell us, I don’t wanna wait

Edie: You can’t ruin your surprises

Moses: Ruin one

Edie: [send him pics of whatever outfit you bought for this day with the funds he gave you]

Moses: So you’ve [however much money he’s worked out she might roughly have left based on what she bought] left, what are you planning to spend it on?

Edie: You, of course, birthday boy

Moses: Me?

Edie: Who else?

Moses: Yourself, it’s yours

Edie: What could I want? You’re coming to see me, for real

Moses: I’ve missed you

Edie: It’s been the longest [however long that time period ended up being] of my life

Moses: I haven’t been this impatient since waiting for you to be born

Edie: 🥰

Edie: What did you do on that birthday, the last one before I arrived?

Moses: [tell her what you did because I’m sure you were going hard as per]

Edie: I doubt they’ll let me in [whatever pubs/clubs he frequents when he is home]

Moses: [give her the tea about the gypsy ones where you can literally do whatever you want because the police are scared to go there]

Edie: Will you want me there, with all your friends and family?

Moses: I want you with me all the time

Edie: We might have time, I’ll add it to the schedule then

Moses: I’ll raise a glass to yous and how pretty you look

Edie: I might take it off the list if you’re going to make me blush

Moses: Why don’t you want to blush for me? It’s my birthday

Edie: In front of all those people? I’ll 💀

Moses: You like an audience when you sing

Edie: That’s different, that’s barely me

Moses: Well, you like being almost caught, and that’s all you

Edie: Also a lot of you but

Edie: okay, I’ll try to not be embarrassed, for you

Moses: I’ll not embarrass you with a big long speech about how much I love you and everything I reckon you are

Edie: It’s not even a big birthday, you show off 😄

Moses: Every birthday is, life’s for living the most you can handle

Edie: A good philosophy

Moses: When I go to my grave it won’t be with plenty of things undone

Edie: You’re not going, never ever

Moses: When I’m old then

Moses: I’ll have done, seen and felt it all

Edie: You’ll take me, so I can say it too

Moses: Wherever I go and whatever I do

Edie: Starting today

Moses: This is your taste of it, how things are going to be when I’m back for good

Edie: I’m going to make it the best birthday you can remember

Moses: Sure, there’s enough I can’t to give you a decent head start 

Edie: Not counting on it or nothing but 🤞

Moses: It’s already the best, I’m [however long] from getting to hold my baby girl

Edie: It’s been so long my mind tricks me I’ve forgotten what that feels like

Moses: You won’t be able to forget how I’m going to

Edie: My daddy

Edie: I should have figured this hug into my plans, I don’t want to let go already

Moses: We’ll do the rest with you attached to me

Edie: How’d you get anything done when I was little and so clingy

Moses: Easy, you was little and no trouble to whatever I wanted to do, same as you’ll be now

Edie: I liked helping you with things

Moses: You learned so quickly, you still do

Edie: You’re a good teacher

Moses: Nah, it’s you, you’re smart

Edie: I can’t be, I’m always fucking up at school

Moses: School isn’t anything to do with it, all they bother themselves with there is babysitting as best they can, which ain’t very, I’d not pay no teachers by the hour to, like, put it that way

Edie: What if my music and other projects can never make me money, what will I do then?

Moses: You don’t need to worry yourself about making money that’s what I’m here for

Edie: You can’t pay for me when I’m an adult

Moses: Why not? I paid for your mammy when we were together, men provide for women that’s their role

Edie: Don’t you mind? It’s not very fair

Moses: You’ll provide for us with your own role, it’s fair

Edie: Okay

Moses: But people like your music, it’ll turn into something

Edie: Do you like it?

Moses: ‘Course, I’m your biggest fan

Moses: [show her that you’ve been listening to her sing happy birthday REPEATEDLY and I do mean on a constant loop because you’re !!]

Edie: You’ll be sick of the sound of me by the time you get here

Moses: There’s too many other sounds I want to hear you make for that to happen

Edie: I can’t imagine what sort of sounds those might be

Moses: You’ll ruin your clothes if you think about it

Edie: Then you’d better behave, we’re having a wholesome day out

Moses: You haven’t left room in the schedule for another shopping trip, I get it

Edie: Stop guessing! No more clues

Moses: But I’m sick of driving, I want to know

Edie: You’re worse than Junior, honestly

Moses: I’m excited, I can’t help being

Edie: 🥺 God, you’re so fucking cute

Edie: alright [and tell him what you’ve planned which I vibe is either playing golf because you strike me as that type of man or if there is an Irish football match on going to see that, then a shopping trip and lunch somewhere he would fuck with and then the pub to end the day]

Moses: You’re fucking cuter, like

Edie: There’s time to go see horses too, if you still want to do that, like

Edie: but it’s okay?

Moses: We’re going there first, you deserve every horse he’s got in the place

Edie: I love you so you deserve the best day, I told you

Moses: And I told you all I care about is spending it with you but you’ve gone and outdone yourself still

Edie: I’m happy you’re happy

Edie: 😁 like

Moses: I’m getting another tattoo for you before I’m away today, to go with the one I had done when you were born, I just decided

Edie: Where?

Edie: I’ll be on you twice, I 🥴

Moses: Where do you reckon I should and what’ll it be of?

Edie: I’m going to need the day to think on that, I can’t on the fly

Edie: there’s too many possibilities and it has to be right, it’s forever

Moses: We could go again for your birthday too, have you on me 3 times

Edie: I’ll give you one on my birthday, if you trust us

Moses: No if, I trust you

Edie: I’ve time to plan that one too, I’ll practice on all the oranges 

Moses: [tell her about when Ali did the one/s she did for you even if she’s already heard the story a million times before, we’re oversharing more than we did the other times clearly because soz not soz it’s an intimate and feral thing to do]

Edie: That might be an even better story than [the one he told her to make her go to sleep in that convo]

Edie: I love your tattoos, especially those ones and mine, of course

Moses: Do you want your own?

Edie: Yes

Edie: Can I?

Moses: Where and what?

Edie: For you, even if only we know that

Moses: It’s all I need know to give my permission

Moses: your mammy can do ‘em, I’ll hold you down to stop you moving

Edie: You want me to pass away there and then, I see how it is

Moses: [not me stealing the story of when the doctors made Cuthbert hold my boo down but him retelling it like remember when in a way like baby Edie liked it and it was a big flirty mood and vibe]

Edie: Please make it happen

Moses: For you

Edie: I’ll not give it away, it’ll sound like I’m being a crybaby

Moses: And you can cry if you need to, nobody’ll mind, not your mammy and not us

Edie: I’ll need to

Moses: You’ll be so wet, tears, sweat, want

Moses: and blood, a little bit

Edie: And all you can do is dry my eyes and mop my brow

Moses: All I can do then, but you’ll wait

Edie: All I can ever do is wait and want for you

Moses: And I’m worth it every time

Edie: But this is the first time, my first time, ours

Moses: When’s that written into your schedule, hmm? You never said

Edie: In case I can’t

Moses: You can

Edie: I don’t want to let you down

Moses: Why would you?

Edie: I don’t wanna jinx us

Moses: Relax, I won’t let your first time be no less than perfect

Edie: If I can’t, will you forgive me?

Moses: There’d be nothing to forgive, I’d just wait and want longer myself

Edie: I want to but

Edie: you know I want to 

Moses: But what, princess?

Edie: What if I’m not the best you’ve ever had

Moses: What you’re worrying about I can teach you, it’s what I don’t need to that already means you’re going to be the best

Moses: you’re you and you’re mine, you belong to me and I made you, we’ve got love for each other I couldn’t find with nobody else, ever

Edie: You care about the same things I do

Moses: Yeah, we think alike

Edie: Same brain as well as blood 

Moses: You’re wired how I’m wired

Edie: You’re not going to have me sent away and locked up, it’s not been an elaborate plan the whole time

Moses: You caught us, that’s exactly it

Edie: Figures

Moses: If I was locking you anywhere it wouldn’t be away from me, you know

Edie: It’s me who needs to lock you in

Moses: Or to your wrist like you’re the law

Edie: 😍😍

Edie: I promise I won’t make a fuss though, when you have to leave

Moses: I’ve never minded that fuss

Edie: As long as it won’t upset you, seeing me upset

Moses: It’s the good kind, from you missing me as hard as only yous do

Edie: I miss you more than I’ve felt anything else, I feel it everywhere, all the time, your not being close

Moses: We’ve the same bones and feelings in ‘em too

Edie: but soon, you’re going to be with me, replacing that feeling

Moses: [give her an updated eta because I’m sure it is soon with how you’re speeding along]

Edie: I really need to get ready

Moses: Hurry yourself, girl, I’ve waited long enough

Edie: You keep distracting me!

Moses: And you’re not distracting, no?

Edie: Never, you said you can get anything done with me attached to you

Moses: You aren’t attached to me yet, that’s what’s killing us

Edie: I can and will be the whole [however long he’s gonna be here until he has to leave again]

Moses: Once you’re up I won’t be letting you down

Edie: Good thing you’re so strong

Moses: And you’re that little

Edie: Not that little

Edie: not for a while

Moses: Forever to me

Edie: That’s why I love you

Moses: Why else?

Edie: Maybe it’s in your song, wait and see

Moses: [another impatient af countdown like but that’s AGES because he is a big child]

Edie: Maybe you should listen first when I’m not there

Edie: If I play it and you hate it, I’ll have to die, you can practice your grateful face whilst you drive

Moses: I don’t need practise, I’m not going to hate it

Edie: but do you want me to send it you? I’ve recorded it

Moses: ‘Course I do, give it

Moses: but that’s because I’ll love it

Edie: [get this out there and published and send it to him, as we said, die imagining what you’re even saying in this song lmao, we know it’s extra]

Moses: [say something v extra in response in gypsy lingo about how talented she is and you can’t believe a voice like that can come out of her because it’s true, Billie has had such a good one from such a young age and it’s wild and that’s before we even get into Edie’s lyrics, hence he’s taken aback in a way that he can’t use or find words in the english language to cover how !! he is rn]

Edie: It’s a gift you can have for all your birthdays

Moses: Will I?

Edie: If you live to be 100 that’ll be 97 songs, all about you

Moses: What’s the record? I might beat it, songs and years alive, like

Edie: A French woman lived to be 122 and 164 days

Edie: as for songs about one single person, that will be something I look up when you’re gone

Moses: I’ll live to be 133 then

Edie: And you’ll still be this handsome, I just know it

Edie: I could stare at you for that entire time

Moses: [tell her about your family some more with the vibe being how old your grandparents/great grandparents if your grandparents are still alive idk etc lived to and if they were slay or not in your opinion with the lives they lived, just giving her some more tea, Johnny’s grandmother who is the healer would have to also be yours because his mum as we know now isn’t a traveller so you can tell her about her especially because you literally think Edie is magic and however far back you have to go in your family tree for someone who is a seer like you think this girl is]

Edie: I love hearing all about your family, where you’re from, I feel like I can know you more, by picturing them

Edie: you tell the best stories

Moses: You can ask me, whatever I haven’t got around to telling you about yet and you’re after hearing more stories of 

Edie: I’ll get to meet them too, know them for myself

Edie: but I want to know what you were like when you were my age

Moses: [obvs tell her some stories because it’ll kill the time while you’re just here driving dangerously and listening to this song over and over like a lunatic]

Edie: You wouldn’t have liked me, I don’t think, in a world where we’re the same age at the same time

Moses: You don’t reckon I would in every world?

Edie: I think you’re a different kind of cool

Moses: I’d want to know you

Edie: Yeah?

Moses: I did your mammy, didn’t I?

Edie: That you did

Moses: And she didn’t write me no songs that she ever told us about, never mind let anyone listen to

Moses: [tell her the frankly insane amount of times you’ve listened to this song already because no shame]

Edie: You really do like it

Edie: I worked on it [and tell him all the time you’ve spent perfecting this in a music nerd way]

Moses: I couldn’t ask for a better birthday present

Edie: You can ask me for anything any day

Moses: Are you trying to get me to crash this car?

Edie: 😰 No, pull over right now, don’t even joke

Moses: I’m not pulling over at [somewhere that’s giving he’s nearby enough that he’s just gonna carry on despite how distracting she is]

Edie: Then I’m 🤐 ‘til you get here

Moses: Well, I’ll just have to turn up your singing for company ‘til I am

Edie: 🥺 Be here

Edie: You know I can’t shut up

Moses: Hold your breath, that might shut yous up enough to hear me knock for you in [however long]

Edie: I’m waiting by the door

Moses: Like the wife I’ve never had

Edie: So thoughtful of you to make not breathing that easy for me

Moses: You’re behaving dutifully, the least I can do

Edie: I feel more like an excited puppy but

Moses: Don’t you go making a mess on your mammy’s floors we haven’t the time to clean up, there’s too much else we’ve got to do

Edie: I’m dressed nice for you, I promise not to make any mess

Moses: [not you taking a selfie to show her what you’re wearing when you’re literally driving and you’ll see her in a sec, this is why y’all crash and die]

[punkscowardschampions]

#modie #edie mckenna #inspo #faces #moses bday

[punkscowardschampions]

Modie pt.1

Edie: You don’t have to pretend to be busy

Edie: you’ve changed your mind, that’s fine

Moses: [a massive delay in replying because he is busy]

Moses: I am busy

Edie: Sure

Edie: well don’t worry because it was a stupid idea anyway

Moses: Cheer up, baby, I’ve had better since

Moses: it’s a surprise but you’ll be so happy when you find out

Edie: I don’t want presents

Moses: You’ll want this one

Edie: All I wanted was to spend more time with you

Moses: I’ll be back [when he will], promise

Edie: I guess I’ll see you whenever you are

Moses: Don’t say it like that

Edie: What?

Moses: You’re not excited no more?

Edie: I was excited when you were coming back [the day he said]

Moses: It can’t be helped jobs running over, I ain’t out having fun without you, am I

Edie: I said it’s fine, I understand

Moses: You don’t, but daddy’s doing something proper nice for you, wait and see

Edie: You are?

Moses: Yeah, ‘course I am

Edie: I’m not allowed to come [to the next place he’s working]

Moses: Don’t worry, this is gonna make up for it and you’ll want to stay right where I’m putting you

Edie: Why did they want you to stay, can’t someone else do it

Moses: I’m the best, you know that

Edie: Yeah, I know

Edie: I’m still upset about it though

Moses: Me too, but if I left it to these dopes I’d have to come back and fix what they’d done wrong and it’d take twice as long

Edie: Okay, I’ll forgive you

Moses: I’m doing it for you, every job is

Edie: But I don’t need anything

Moses: Don’t you trust me to know what you need?

Edie: Yes but

Edie: Why did you make mammy tell me, don’t you want to talk to me?

Moses: I’m upset when you’re upset and I’ve got to focus

Edie: I try not to be

Moses: But you are and it’s all I can think of

Edie: I’m sorry, daddy

Moses: It’s not your fault

Edie: I’ll leave you alone

Moses: I don’t want us both alone

Edie: I won’t be, don’t worry, I’ll be fine

Moses: With who?

Edie: What do you mean?

Moses: Your mammy says there’s something going on with you and Liam, is there?

Edie: I’ve told you about Liam

Moses: Have you told me everything?

Edie: I don’t know what you want to know

Moses: She thinks you’re all over him when mine and her backs are turned, it’s what she said

Edie: Oh

Edie: I’ve not slept with him

Moses: I told her you wouldn’t

Edie: She’s just worried, I’ll tell her

Moses: She reckons I’m to keep a close eye on you or you’ll be getting yourself in trouble

Edie: What do you think?

Moses: You’re a good girl, you’re not like her

Edie: Why do you have to be mean

Moses: I’m not

Edie: I wouldn’t be here if she was a ‘good girl’

Edie: you wanted me, didn’t you?

Moses: And I want you still

Edie: So be nice, you couldn’t have done it without her

Moses: I just don’t want you being hurt how the other lads hurt her before she was with me, that’s all I mean

Edie: No one’s going to hurt me, I’ve got you to protect me, haven’t I

Moses: Yeah, but I’m not with you now or as much as I should be

Edie: I’ve my brother and Liam too

Moses: Right, but it’s not the same

Edie: They wouldn’t let me be hurt

Moses: No, I know

Edie: What’s the matter?

Moses: Nothing, your mammy and her carry on worried me for you

Edie: I want you to care

Moses: Well I do

Edie: Promise?

Moses: I miss you enough to walk off this job

Edie: I wish you could

Edie: It aches inside my chest

Moses: I want to but it’ll kick off

Edie: I know you can’t

Moses: Post yourself to us

Edie: Will you have time to unwrap me?

Edie: I don’t want to suffocate waiting for you

Moses: I’ll make the time before you go blue, like

Edie: We’re almost blue, your veins show through your skin like mine and mammy’s too

Moses: Because you’ve my blood

Edie: I can hear it, in my ears

Moses: Ours is faster than other people’s, we’ve that much to do

Edie: I hope [however long it is until he’s back now] goes as fast

Moses: How long are you able to hold your breath for?

Moses: post’d have you sent here in [however many days]

Edie: I’ll have to practice

Moses: No cheating

Edie: I wouldn’t 😠

Moses: I’ll have to watch yous

Edie: You still think I’m a sneak

Edie: I shouldn’t have told you about that

Moses: I only want to see you

Edie: I only wanted to see you

Moses: Hold your breath and I’ll count, we’re a team

Edie: Okay, I’m ready

Moses: Go

Edie: [facetime him, holding your breath]

Moses: [we see you counting sir like this is fine and casual]

Edie: [it’s not at all but at least you will just hang up when you are unable to hold your breath any longer, rather than let him watch you catch your breath]

Moses: [tell her again the final number she got to and where that is in terms of how far, like we’re naming a town she’s made it to if she was posted, you know what I mean]

Edie: That’s not gonna cut it

Edie: I’ll see how David Blaine did it

Moses: [tell her how long it would take you to drive there from where you are as if she’s waiting there and you’re gonna pick her up]

Edie: If you go [a speed that you should not be driving on any road] you can cut that in half

Moses: [ramp that up by saying an even more ludicrous speed to cut the time even more, stop flirting please ffs]

Edie: I think I can wait that long

Moses: You’ve no need to practise crawling, walking or even running no more, you could to me

Edie: But 

Edie: will you be there when I get there?

Moses: Where else would I be?

Edie: [where he is right now] or [places he’s been before] or [where he’s going next]

Moses: Unless you’re lost and that’s where you end up going

Edie: Am I lost?

Moses: Do you feel you are?

Edie: Yes, maybe

Edie: I don’t know

Moses: But you’re not scared

Edie: What of?

Moses: Anything ever

Moses: you’re too like me to be

Edie: I’m like you

Moses: You’re of me

Edie: I’m yours

Moses: My princess

Edie: Why do you have to be the only one who can do the job

Moses: Why haven’t you sung to us?

Edie: I’m waiting to do it in person

Moses: But I’ve got no patience to wait

Edie: If you’ve no patience then neither have I

Moses: You can’t have

Edie: Still you make me

Moses: Make your mammy bring yous to me

Edie: She’s not going to do that

Moses: That’s why you’re gonna need to force her

Edie: She says there’s no families on jobs like that

Edie: is that why they send you?

Moses: And what would she know about the jobs I’m on?

Edie: Isn’t it true?

Moses: It’s true I don’t play by no one’s rules

Edie: And you know my mammy won’t be forced to do nothing

Moses: By me, but she’s wrapped ‘round your finger

Edie: I know how to make people want to do things

Moses: And don’t you want to spend time together?

Edie: If you’re working all the time, we won’t get to

Moses: They can’t work me all the time

Moses: just say you don’t want to if you don’t

Edie: I’d never say that

Moses: Sounds like you’re saying it

Edie: I’m not, I’ll come, of course I will

Moses: Promise

Edie: If you mean it, I’ll talk to her right now

Moses: What wouldn’t I mean?

Edie: I mean, you’re not just saying it, to make me feel better

Moses: It’s to make us both feel better, having you here

Edie: Are you lonely there?

Moses: And so bored

Edie: You won’t be, I’ll entertain you

Moses: You’ll bring the fun with you, will you?

Edie: I make you laugh, you said so

Moses: [tell her about how you used to make her laugh when she was a baby and then a toddler, just gradually getting older with the stories until it’s more recent]

Edie: No one is ever going to try as hard for me as you do, are they

Moses: No one loves you like I do

Edie: I’m the luckiest girl in the world

Moses: I’m lucky to be your daddy

Edie: Were you scared? You were so young when I was born

Moses: No, I wanted you

Edie: What was it like having two babies at the same time? She wasn’t quite 1

Moses: It would’ve been better if she was mine but I loved having yous both

Edie: You should have more, I’ve decided it’s okay

Moses: Oh have you really?

Edie: Yeah

Edie: You love it and you’re so good at it, it’s be unfair not to let you

Moses: You’d change your mind looking at me holding another one

Edie: You said it, I’m too big to hold

Moses: I reckon I said you’re getting to be, not yet

Edie: How long?

Moses: How big are you? Been ages since I’ve measured you off the door how we did when you was small

Edie: I’m taller than Rio now

Moses: What about stood next to your mammy?

Edie: Almost, there’s barely anything in it

Moses: Maybe I’ll have to face it that you are a big girl now then, treat you as one

Edie: Are you sad?

Moses: Wouldn’t be fair to stop you growing up

Edie: Maybe I don’t want to

Moses: Why, I’m not going to lock you in like my cousin would, you can do what you want

Edie: Do you still want me to go see them?

Moses: Are you after going for yourself or only for us?

Edie: I’m curious

Moses: So meet them because of that

Edie: I embarrassed myself too

Moses: What d’you mean? How?

Edie: I just wanted him to prove he cared like he said, or show me that it was just bullshit

Moses: What have you done?

Edie: Nothing, I just wanted to know if guilt money was all there was

Moses: Where’s the shame in that? Tell me what happened

Edie: I said if he meant it he’d come and look after us all

Edie: obviously that weren’t going to happen but it freaked him out that I said it

Moses: And you meant to put the wind up him, nothing else was meant by it

Edie: I’d have to be an idiot to think otherwise

Moses: He’d think you might be, he thinks I am sure enough

Edie: I just want everyone to be happy

Moses: He’s in no position to make anyone happy, he’s the eejit

Edie: I suppose so

Moses: I’m not giving out brownie points for your supposing he could take my place

Edie: It wasn’t like that

Moses: What was it like, hmm?

Edie: You know how badly I miss you when you’re away

Moses: He ain’t a cure, got that?

Edie: Nothing is

Moses: I’m it

Moses: what I offer you nobody else can

Edie: Then give it to me, don’t leave me wanting

Moses: Aren’t I waiting for you right now?

Edie: You’re the one in control

Moses: So do as you’re told

Edie: Tell me again

Moses: Come here

Edie: [time to talk to your mother and convince her you need to visit him rn immediately]

Edie: Okay, did it

Moses: I knew you’d convince her of what’s best

Edie: I feel like I can’t remember when I last saw you, how I’m meant to act around you

Moses: [tell her but as per get some of the details wrong whether that’s the when or the where you’re mixing up with another time or something else, we know what I’m saying]

Edie: [counter with another time, a happy mem of some description like that covers the bits he got wrong there]

Moses: [remind her how she used to act around you when she was younger as if that’s the appropriate way for her to still behave, giving the tongue biting story with the vibes but slightly less blatant]

Edie: You’re the cutest daddy in the whole wide world

Edie: you remember so much

Moses: You’re all I think of, I told you

Edie: I’m going to attach myself to you how I used to, so you can’t move without me

Moses: When’s she bringing you?

Edie: When she’s finished [whatever your mother is in the middle of doing, who can say]

Moses: Good, well done

Edie: I just wanna make you proud

Moses: There’s no prouder daddy around

Edie: You won’t be able to stand it

Moses: I’ll stand tall showing you off

Edie: As long as I can hide in your chest

Moses: I won’t control your every move, I know you’re shy

Edie: I just don’t know what to do when men look at me

Moses: You’re to tell me and I’ll handle it any time but this

Edie: You can show me off, it’s what you want, you’re to have it

Moses: I want you, I don’t care about nothing else

Edie: My bags still packed

Moses: Be worth the wait

Edie: Have you been thinking about me as much as I’ve been thinking about you

Moses: We both know the answer to that

Edie: I need the answer to be yes, so I can picture it

Moses: Plenty of nights I’m kept up and don’t sleep for thinking of you

Edie: Must be me thinking of you, using my powers to stop you from leaving me awake without you

Moses: You would

Edie: I will

Moses: Not if I use mine to get you to sleep

Edie: It takes more these days

Moses: I’ll give you more, what you need

Edie: You know

Moses: Everything, baby, guarantee you that

Edie: I’m not going to make it to [where he is]

Moses: You’ve no say, I need you to

Edie: Where do you want me, daddy?

Moses: Never out my sight

Edie: Keep hold of me

Moses: Against me, where you should always be

Edie: Your body is so strong and hard, I feel like I could dissolve into you

Moses: You’re part of it

Edie: All your softness, for you to love and keep safe

Moses: That you are, I couldn’t show no softness ‘til I had you

Edie: You’d never hurt me, you’re so careful

Moses: I’d break you if I weren’t

Edie: I’m not frightened

Moses: You don’t need to be

Edie: You need me, so you can put all your love somewhere

Moses: Yeah

Edie: You don’t need to be frightened either, I promise

Moses: I’m not neither

Edie: You’ll stay, once I give all of me to you

Moses: I’m your daddy there’s no getting rid

Edie: Want me this much, every day

Moses: I couldn’t want you more or less, it’s only ever this much

Edie: No one else could do this to me, I’m made for you

Moses: All my love because I made you with it

Edie: It’s for me, stop giving it to people who don’t deserve you

Moses: I told your mammy I’d stop, no more women is what I said

Edie: She’s the only one I’ll share with, and my brothers and sisters

Moses: And she don’t want none of me now he’s back

Edie: Never say never

Edie: I remember how it was

Moses: You weren’t born for how they were together

Edie: Will you tell me, how you put me inside mammy

Moses: I had to, it was like god was telling me or something, and sure I don’t really believe in him even but I know I couldn’t help myself

Edie: She pulls you in, I’ve seen, you’re not meant to pull away from that

Edie: Push through until you find God, find me

Moses: That’s how it was, true enough

Edie: Will she join us

Edie: or is she lost forever

Moses: You’ll have to use your sight again

Edie: I’ve thought of her, maybe I keep her awake too

Edie: being her, being inside her, you, everywhere

Moses: I remember how she looked when you were, best she could’ve ever had

Edie: That’s my favourite time to think about, being between you, safe and sound, all the feral fucking I know happened with me right there

Moses: You’re not to let them words out of your mouth in front of her, she’ll reckon I fed them to you

Edie: But you didn’t, this is how I feel, I’ve felt like it for as long as I can remember

Moses: I probably am to blame, you think how I do

Edie: I don’t know how to stop it, I can pretend but I can’t make it real

Edie: nothing is as real as this feeling

Moses: You can’t stop yourself being who you’re meant to

Edie: I’m yours and hers and that’s all I want to be, all I want is to be with you both forever

Moses: And you will be

Edie: Make it real, daddy, please, it can’t just be memories I never know if are fully real or my sick head

Moses: There’s nothing wrong with your head, understand that first

Edie: I feel like I’m on fire

Moses: I’ll fix it, don’t I always?

Edie: Say you’ll show me, how I was made

Moses: I can’t make your mammy agree, but I’ll show you

Edie: How your name sounded, forced out of her, she called you daddy like I do, I know that’s real because I couldn’t imagine anything that perfect

Moses: It’s real, you must’ve heard

Edie: I remember banging my head against the door, the same rhythm of the bed hitting the wall

Moses: You used to shake the bars of your cot to be let out too, like I’d put you in a prison instead of a bed

Edie: I wanted to touch you, make you that happy, feel your sticky skin and kiss your mouth to taste hers

Moses: She tastes like [something, idk but you shouldn’t be telling her whatever it is]

Edie: I’m [eating/drinking/whatever to get this taste] right now, I need to

Moses: Your hair feels and smells the same as hers, I’ve thought that before

Edie: I’ll wear it down for you

Moses: What colour have you turned it? Last I saw it was [whatever colour because even at like 12 I’m sure you’ve begun to]

Edie: [I won’t commit us to an era but probably the silver kind of colour but idk]

Edie: I might have it dark like yours soon

Moses: Me and your mammy both expected you to be born with dark hair like mine

Edie: Were you happy or sad?

Moses: I can’t remember feeling sad over anything, I was too happy you were here

Edie: You loved me before you met me, before you and her mixed inside her

Moses: ‘Course, how could I not?

Edie: And there’s nothing I could do or say to make you stop?

Moses: You’re testing us, but no, I don’t reckon I’ve the knowing how to stop

Edie: I want something new to start, you want me to be yours, show me

Moses: You’re new

Edie: Nobody has touched me, I’ve never touched myself to anything but the thought of you and mammy

Moses: When did you start that?

Edie: When did you first touch yourself?

Moses: [not you telling her the story, which I am not committing us to because I’m not a boy and I’m certainly not the kind of boy he is lol so idk how old you’d be, but lord the overshare]

Edie: 🥰🥺 baby daddy

Moses: Now you tell me how old you was

Edie: [tell him, of course, overshare for an overshare]

Moses: Jesus

Edie: Don’t be mad

Moses: All that time but you’ve not let nobody else touch you?

Edie: It’s your fingers I’m dreaming about

Edie: my own already felt like a betrayal but I needed it so badly

Moses: Yours are like hers, she had to touch herself because of me plenty, don’t feel bad for it

Edie: Imagine me and her, waiting for you to take over, side by side

Moses: Do you sound like her too or are yous different?

Edie: I’ve never made a sound, I told you, I couldn’t get caught 

Edie: but I’ve memorized her, pitch perfect

Moses: That don’t mean you didn’t wanna, that you never felt them stuck in your throat, you know what kind they’d be

Edie: And I wanted to get caught

Edie: When I could believe that my punishment would be what I was choking over

Moses: Your daddy to catch you

Edie: To see me, fucking myself looking at pictures of him and my mammy

Moses: Send me a picture of you with [whatever this food/drink/thing is] in your mouth

Edie: [do it, with the thing whole/then progressively grosser/messier pics, you know the vibe]

Moses: You’d look nice with your hair dark

Edie: What colour do you like best?

Moses: We could match the colour to your surprise, if you don’t want to keep on looking like me forever

Edie: I want to look like you, I don’t want you to forget I’m your baby

Moses: I’ll never forget you’re mine, neither will you

Edie: You’re not allowed to imagine I’m not your daughter, you have to think about it, how I think about you

Moses: I don’t want to think of someone else, not even your mammy

Edie: Shh, don’t spoil it

Moses: We can’t get spoiled

Edie: I don’t like it when you’re not nice to her

Edie: how is it going to be like before otherwise

Moses: It won’t, it’ll be new, like you said

Edie: But 

Moses: And you said you wanted us all to yourself, remember?

Edie: That’s not what I want

Moses: Don’t you?

Edie: It’s gone

Edie: or gone wrong

Moses: What’s wrong? Talk to me

Edie: Forget it, forget about it

Moses: Come on, baby

Edie: I can’t

Moses: You can talk to me

Edie: I don’t know what to say

Moses: Tell me what’s going on inside your head

Edie: All bad, this shouldn’t be happening and I shouldn’t have said any of that, none of it

Moses: You’re not bad, you haven’t done anything that is

Edie: Are you going to tell?

Moses: You’re in no trouble and you’ve caused none

Edie: That’s not an answer

Moses: What’s to tell? We talk all the time, don’t we?

Edie: Not like this, not any longer

Moses: Not if you don’t want to

Edie: We can’t

Moses: I’ve never put my mind to forcing yours

Edie: And I’m not going to make you this person, based on mine

Moses: What person? You’ve the knowing of exactly who I am, better than anyone

Edie: You know what person, but it’s okay

Edie: Nothing happened

Moses: Calm down, you’re gonna upset yourself for nothing

Edie: Nothing, right

Moses: Don’t cry, just relax

Edie: I’m not crying

Moses: You’d say that while you were, I know you too

Edie: I’m sorry

Moses: Quit that, I’ve told you

Edie: I can’t, I have to say something but there’s nothing else I can

Moses: Shut up for a minute and use it to get yourself together, your mammy don’t want you in this state when she finishes her [whatever she’s doing]

Edie: I’m gonna go out instead

Moses: Out where?

Edie: I dunno, but she’s not gonna see me, don’t worry

Moses: Give me nothing to worry on or I’m bound to

Edie: There’s nothing to worry about, this is a good thing

Moses: What?

Edie: Getting out of here, I’m taking time, like you said

Moses: It ain’t good you’ve no destination, trust us, I’ve been there

Edie: I can’t get into any more trouble, that’s impossible

Moses: No it’s not, there’s always more trouble

Edie: Not than this

Moses: When you go looking it’s found, I can’t have you walking the streets

Edie: I won’t, I’ll go see Django

Moses: Give me your word

Edie: Why don’t you believe me, what do you think

Moses: That’s not you promising, give it now

Edie: And you

Moses: I wouldn’t push me, girl

Edie: Where else would I go, what do you imagine I’m gonna go do after that? 

Edie: what the fuck

Moses: So fucking promise and I’ll say no more about it

Edie: I promise! Happy?

Moses: What did you have to make me act hard with you for? Are you happy now, god

Edie: You’re meant to, this is how it’s supposed to be

Moses: You’re telling me what I’m meant to do 

Edie: No, you just did me

Moses: I’m supposed to do what I want

Edie: No one’s there to stop you

Moses: Rub that in, like

Edie: Go out, do all the things you don’t want me to

Moses: Stop speaking for me or I’ll not speak to yous

Edie: I’m not

Edie: was just a suggestion, I know you, remember

Moses: Your ideas started this

Edie: Ouch

Edie: yeah, okay

Moses: No yeah okay, don’t try and lay the law down like you’re who knows best how things are to go or not go

Edie: I don’t know anything at all, that’s the point, I’m mental, clearly and totally

Moses: I know my own daughter

Edie: Then tell me how to make it right

Moses: It’s done with

Edie: What is?

Moses: We’ll forget it, keep on like we didn’t speak those things to each other

Edie: Will that work?

Moses: Grand, if we want it to

Edie: Okay

Edie: We’ll make it work

Moses: We’ve no other choice, I’ll say again, I’m your daddy you’re not getting rid

Edie: I don’t want to

Moses: I don’t want that either

Edie: Whatever mortifying thing I’ve said, I still don’t want you to go

Moses: I’m going nowhere, I still love you, I’ve told you I won’t stop

Edie: I love you too

Edie: I’m going to do better

Moses: I know

Edie: We can just see each other like normal, how we did last time you were here, right?

Edie: When you’re back

Moses: [the day he’s back as if he’s like yep it’s a date when we ALL know he’ll flake somehow]

Edie: 😊

Edie: Maybe we can go [to a restaurant that’s lowkey not a vibe but the kind of place you’d take children] all of us?

Moses: I’ll get that booked up

Edie: I’ll make you some [again giving a baked thing you would’ve as a child ‘cos he likes ‘em, even if I’m just saying brownies, you get the vibe]

Moses: Sweet of you, been ages

Edie: I’ll get less shell in them now, promise that, like

Moses: Ask your sister to help and you might

Edie: Rude!

Edie: She’s far too busy to make things for you these days

Moses: Ha, you won’t ask her is the truth

Edie: I’d bet you

Moses: How much?

Edie: I’d have to check how much I have 🤔

Moses: [an amount that she probably doesn’t have lbr]

Edie: You think so much of yourself, daddy

Moses: I think what I should of myself

Edie: 😏 Well I can’t back it up with [that amount of cash]

Moses: You’ll find something else to

Edie: Alright, if I win, I get to delete the song I wrote for you

Edie: if you do, I’ll play it for you

Moses: Agreed

Edie: 🤝

Moses: Right, on you go to your brother’s and mind how you do

Edie: I know, I know

Moses: There’s a girl

Edie: Still your girl

Moses: All mine

Edie: Forever and always

Moses: [dip now sir because it’s awks and you would]

Edie: Bye then…

Moses: [the actual heartbreak of him not replying, not having booked this restaurant when the time comes and not being back when he said, again]

Edie: [me here like and this is why she was inappropriate with Johnny and ultimately every father figure she’s had, should I message when it’s that time? Even if you don’t reply, because of course she wouldn’t just let it go unnoted] 

Moses: [mhmmmmm, and yes absolutely, go for it boo bear]

Edie: [not a video of you dramatically binning these brownies, no, don’t let ‘em go to waste gurl, not for this flop lmao]

Edie: Enjoy… whatever you’re still doing there, yeah? I mean it

Moses: There was work to be had in [somewhere far in the scheme of how small ireland is and nothing being that far], my daddy asked for me, I couldn’t tell him no

Edie: When?

Edie: Why do you not just tell me these things?

Moses: It was late notice for me too, age’s slowing him down he can’t take on the same jobs he used to on his own

Edie: I just wish I knew before I was waiting, that’s all

Moses: If it could be avoided, I would

Edie: What’s the job?

Moses: [tell her idk what you do, but I’m imagining this is big and long, giving that you’ll be away ages, bringing up to date with where jali are and potentially way past it too cos we said not a big gap]

Edie: Busy, busy

Moses: I would’ve said had you not beat us to it, like

Edie: I’ll leave you to it then, again

Moses: Good girl

Edie: How can I be anything but

Moses: What you talking about?

Edie: There’s no parenting you can do that busy or that far away

Moses: That’s no threat you should be throwing my way, however far or busy I am

Edie: It’s no threat

Moses: You’d hurt yourself before you hurt me

Edie: That’s how it’s always been

Moses: Don’t make me out to sound like that, it’d give me no pleasure to see you get yourself in a state

Edie: You aren’t here, you don’t see it

Moses: I still feel it, you know

Edie: I’m not saying sorry for it this time

Moses: Why? It isn’t my fault I’m needed here

Edie: You should still have to feel it with me

Moses: I feel everything with you, don’t I?

Edie: Do you?

Moses: Baby, please

Edie: I don’t know how much longer I can do this

Moses: Come on

Edie: I love you so much but it’s not enough

Moses: No fucking buts, you love me and I should be enough for you

Edie: It’s me who’s not enough for you, ever

Moses: Who’s ever said it, not me

Edie: You don’t want to be saying anything

Moses: That’s not true

Edie: Just don’t promise me things, I’ll see you when I do, it’s okay, you don’t know when that is

Moses: You’re the reason I get up, put myself to bed to do it all again and for all else what happens in between, you

Edie: I need to be in your life more, for all that to matter, so you can see that it does

Moses: When I’m back, I’ll stay, the cash from this means I can

Edie: That’s too close to a promise, daddy

Moses: [tell her how much you’re getting paid like I really mean it this time okay]

Moses: wait one last time and it’ll be the last time I ask you to

Edie: Wow

Edie: what are you going to buy?

Moses: That’s a surprise, I told you I had a big present planned

Edie: Not THAT big

Moses: I can’t wait for your face

Edie: Do I get a clue?

Moses: You’ll find you have the space to sing the song you owe without feeling shy

Edie: Now how did you know Rih helped me with those brownies?

Moses: Because she did, she would

Edie: Junior will probably eat those out the bin

Moses: His daddy would too

Edie: Awh, that would be quite sweet

Moses: You’re sweet, my jaw aches knowing the smile you’ll wear when I give you your present

Edie: Is it my birthday present?

Moses: It might be, unless I’m home earlier

Edie: I might have another song by then for you

Moses: Angry song, is it?

Edie: No

Edie: I don’t know how it will make you feel but we’ll see together

Moses: Sing me something else ‘til then, I miss you now

Edie: [record him a voice note of you singing some song you know he likes or liked back in the day at least because you can’t be throwing out your own songs yet]

Moses: [do a childhood mem of hers that’s associated with said song but actually get the details right this once]

Edie: That’s exactly when I was thinking of too

Moses: You took us right there

Edie: Maybe that’s another power of mine

Edie: I hope so

Moses: You’re so special, has to be

Moses: I’m gonna listen every night I’m away

Edie: I’ll do you a proper cover, a better one

Moses: I want this one

Edie: I’ll sing for you whenever you ask

Moses: You’ll lose your voice all together if I ask every time I’m after hearing you

Edie: I’ll stop talking, problem solved

Edie: I only want to talk to you right now

Moses: Say it’s enough

Edie: It’s enough, I never meant what you thought I meant, I promise

Moses: You can’t leave me like that

Edie: I can’t leave you, end of sentence

Moses: I’d be lost, more than a voice gone

Edie: I will never let that happen

Edie: I can’t lose you

Moses: Keep sight of us

Edie: I hate fighting with you, I never want to

Moses: [tell her about all the drinking and lbr probs drugs too you did to forget it like it’s a brag how much you could and feelsy how much you had to and not once again inappropriate to be sharing this]

Edie: Does your head ache as well as your jaw? 😔

Moses: It did but I feel better for talking to you

Edie: What does [a drug he mentioned there] feel like?

Moses: [obvs tell her with 0 hesitation, as much as you can really sum up or describe things like that, going into too much detail about things you absolutely should not as per because a lot of drugs make people horny we all know]

Edie: Interesting

Edie: Can I try some?

Moses: For your birthday, a tiny bit

Edie: You’ll have to be the responsible one, watch me

Moses: I won’t take my eyes off you

Edie: You never do

Moses: But I’ll not even blink, my eyes’ll ache for you

Edie: I can’t even picture a party and the room full of people now, only you

Edie: your eyes

Moses: We’ll dance to [the song she sang]

Edie: You can spin me around until everything else blurs and doesn’t matter at all

Moses: ‘Til it don’t feel real, only I do, holding you up

Edie: You’re so real, you burn the brightest in my head, I never forget things when you’re there

Moses: Your heart won’t have beat faster before

Edie: You won’t let me be scared, not for a second

Moses: The good kind, just for a second

Edie: I want that

Moses: You’ll have it

Edie: You won’t miss my birthday

Moses: You don’t trust my promises no more, what can I say that you’ll believe? 

Edie: I do, it wasn’t a question, a reminder to myself

Moses: I’ll be there to crown you, it’s our tradition

Edie: No one else is capable or allowed

Edie: You’re the only king I know

Moses: I’m only yours

Edie: No other princesses? 

Moses: No sharing on your birthday

Edie: And no one else is allowed to blow out my candles

Moses: Who’d try and steal your wish? You deserve it

Edie: Someone who knows what I want, maybe

Edie: but no one does

Moses: [reminisce about when you took this gal to a bday party and literally let her do that because you would], deserved it then too

Edie: The kid was devvo’d still but their mammy got over it quick enough

Moses: What did you wish for on those candles? I reckon it’s been long enough you can tell

Edie: [whatever it was, which I know involves him somehow, this has always been how it is]

Moses: [talk about how it came true because of whatever he did even if it wasn’t at all like her actual wish because you’re that bitch]

Edie: You’re your own kind of magic, daddy

Moses: All my love needs to find its way to you

Edie: [a selfie of you holding your hand to your cheek like you just caught a blown kiss]

Moses: [something about her hair, whether it’s the same as the last time she sent him a pic or different, giving a very childlike yet inappropriate colour related compliment I imagine]

Moses: does it taste of [something vaguely that colour]?

Edie: [a quick vid of you biting a strand of your hair, before sucking it through your lips, brushing your tongue over it like you’re really pondering that even though obviously not lol]

Moses: Well, what’s the answer?

Edie: It still tastes like [what he said hers and Ali’s hair smelt like, which must be their shampoo or something like that]

Edie: but I’ll let you see, when I change it for my birthday

Moses: You’ll show me

Edie: You can try, when no one’s watching, it tickles though, be warned

Moses: I’m used to that from you already

Edie: I only do it on purpose like half the time

Moses: I know all about how you can’t be still unless I make you

Edie: I miss your body, laying all over it

Moses: It misses you, I want you there again

Edie: You’re owed so much sleep, I know

Edie: when you’re finished working, we’ll get in bed together and not leave

Moses: For how long?

Edie: Hmm

Edie: Until I’m 14?

Moses: And then what are we gonna do?

Edie: Whatever we want

Moses: I want you to [describing how I, as a baby, used to walk up and down on my dad’s chest and stomach like I was doing a lil moon landing as he held my hands, I don’t know how to properly describe it hence the brackets and soz to my actual daddy for corrupting this wholesome activity but well]

Edie: 👩🏼‍🚀🌑

Edie: What if I crush you by mistake?

Moses: How would you?

Moses: [not you sending a pic to show off those specific muscles rn, not this]

Edie: Jesus

Moses: You don’t hate us working as much now, do you?

Edie: You need to be working where I can keep my eyes on you

Moses: I’ll build you a [something like a tree house or sand pit she either is too old for or would already have or something frankly ludicrous like him saying he’ll dig an outdoor pool in ireland in october, either way] and you can watch me

Edie: How many hours do you work a day?

Moses: [obvs tell her idk but we all know that you do work hard that’s one thing about you]

Edie: That might do, yeah

Moses: Oh it might, yeah?

Edie: Can’t work you to death, you’re a man, sure, not a horse

Moses: [talk about when you were a horse for her because I was too scared to be doing that as a bub but kids do with their dads]

Edie: [tell him what his horse name was lmao because she is a bit of a horse girl so here we are], remember?

Moses: Do you want a real horse? I’ll let you call the animal something different if needs

Edie: Really, really really?!

Moses: Sure, now you’re older I won’t worry myself over you falling off

Edie: And this is no my surprise?

Moses: I’ve just this minute thought of it

Edie: I love you so much, I’m going to scream

Moses: Your grandaddy owes us a horse for his working me like one, he’ll sort that

Edie: How do I say thank you to him? I don’t know what he likes, not like you

Moses: We’ll both of us take a shot of [whatever this man drinks because why not you’ve already offered her drugs] with him, he’ll reckon you’re funny to watch

Edie: Funny, I can be funny

Edie: does he love me?

Moses: You’ll have to ask him, that’ll be funny for me

Edie: I only know Ronan, really

Edie: tell me about the rest of your family again

Moses: I’ll teach you what to say to make him love you in the language wes have got

Edie: Mammy can do that

Edie: I want to know too, all the good words

Moses: [do teach her something cheeky that’ll make this wrong’un dad lol and obvs tell her about him and the rest of your fam as well and what you wanted to name her if she was a boy, god knows there because there are some names and a half, Duke maybe it’s giving princess vibes which was your girl pick]

Edie: [send him your attempts at practising this phrase] 

Edie: I’ll make them all love me, even though I’m not a boy

Moses: My mammy maybe not but you don’t really need to bother yourself with her

Edie: That’s okay, you get to pick who and how much

Edie: because all of my love is yours

Moses: Love me most and I’ll not care who’s 3rd after your mammy

Edie: I wish I could marry you, like I thought I could when I was wee

Moses: You had a dress that was so like for a wedding

Edie: I bet it’s somewhere in dressing up

Edie: I’ll put it on for you

Moses: I don’t know that you’ll fit, but find it out for me still

Edie: I’ll see how much or little of me fits

Edie: it’s [the dress he’s talking about, of course] right?

Moses: [send her a pic of her wearing it for ref that you just have because you’d have loads of pics of her on your phone of all ages, you’re that dad, Ali sending them like remember your child you haven’t seen in forever]

Edie: I really am your favourite 

Edie: I know we still have it here somewhere

Moses: [just sending her other pics as you shamelessly scroll through them all]

Edie: I’ve an album of pictures of you too, I’ve stalked you from before I was born, all your profiles

Moses: What’s your favourite one?

Edie: That depends on so many things

Moses: This second, gun to your head

Edie: [a picture that’s not only recent but a shameless thirst trap because we know what sort of mood we’re in right this second]

Moses: [not you basically taking one for her rn immediately as if she needs a more recent and more thirst trap-y pic and posting it for her to see]

Edie: [not you sliding into his DMs immediately because no fucks given ‘my daddy makes me wet’ in this convo like you never so casual]

Moses: [replying with 🍼💦 like you’re her age and because she’s both thirsty for you and your actual baby, and thank the lord I don’t think a nappy emoji exists or the heathens would be popping off]

Edie: [carrrying on like this is flirty banter with a random ‘🤤 in my mouth immediately thanks’]

Moses: [🤤👍 like he’s giving her his thumb to suck]

Edie: [sending a pic of you sucking your own but both thumbs like that’s more accurate to the experience]

Moses: [doing the eyes emoji like when he said he would not blink because ofc cannot stop looking at it, call the police]

Edie: [resending the pics of you with the food/drink/whatever in your mouth like remember when you asked me to do this]

Moses: [a pic of his lap like he just wants her to sit in it and he isn’t a blatantly turned on fully grown man in said image]

Edie: [no other way to describe this but a vid of her sitting down on this phone as slowly as possible about it, letting him see as much as he can with underwear still on, because obviously trying on this miniscule dress rn]

Moses: [🤗 to signify pulling her down and holding her in his lap how he would]

Edie: [back in this chat because again, we don’t care]

Edie: 🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎

Moses: [saying his horse name again, whatever that was]

Edie: You’ll teach me how to, no saddle

Moses: It’s easy, you’ll learn quick once I’ve shown you

Edie: I just pull your hair the opposite way to where I wanna go, right?

Moses: Exactly right

Edie: and kick you in the side when I wanna go faster

Moses: But you need to go slow at first, careful

Edie: You still worry

Moses: I don’t want you hurt, it’s meant to be fun

Edie: [send him another pic of this dress not fitting in a different way]

Edie: I’m having fun, aren’t you?

Moses: Fuck

Edie: I’ll wear this for you

Moses: Post it to me, I need it

Edie: You do, you’re away so long this time

Moses: And that’ll feel longer now, harder to be away

Edie: I’ll send it, I’ll think of more things you need to keep you from missing me too bad

Moses: A care package suits, for all your love

Edie: If I write you a letter, will you read it?

Moses: I might eat it, but only after

Edie: Film that

Moses: [filming himself now, as if he’s practising and not just showing her how feral he’s being on this day]

Edie: Maybe I’ll put it to one of my songs

Moses: I’ll have you try and sing one as you’re riding, see how far you get and what that sounds like

Edie: This is going to be the best birthday ever

Moses: Be my turn to for the happy birthday song

Edie: You’re going to be Jesus’ age

Moses: Am I?

Edie: There’s 20 years and 27 days exactly between us

Moses: What’s your sight tell you about those numbers?