radjoy

[radjoy]

mine is five degrees separated from donald trump btw. yes it haunts me. you do have to tell me who it is in the tags because im nosy.

#i’m related by marriage to the ex owner of the buffalo sabres who went to jail for fraud and embezzlement and then got out by faking cancer

[radjoy]

okay THIS makes sense. the house makes sense! thank you for explaining exactly how the houses are put together! every time someone said that houses trap heat i was like how. do the windows not open. are houses made of glass from the south side.

“no ac” has never made much sense to me because a lot of people don’t have central air (which is the vents) or even a window unit. like my grandparents never got it, i lived in a barn every summer of college, i was like ac cannot be the defining factor here because i have not had it regularly. but in every house without ac i’ve lived in, most were at least partially elevated so air could get under the house, and windows or doors on all sides could open to let in a crossbreeze, and there weren’t any connecting structures to trap heat. i get why opening a window wouldn’t help now. and when there’s a ton of houses together like that, there’s probably not a lot of trees to shade the house?

thank you for explaining! it sounds like a shotgun house, but with no windows on the sides? a bunch of them just all smushed together? it honestly sounds like hell. i appreciate you explaining so kindly.

okay i totally get that heat waves in england/northern europe are a problem. i do. i know climate change is a huge deal, i know people have died, i’m not making fun, this isn’t me being a snippy american. i just… literally do not understand how? what are people dying from? heatstroke? in like 95F weather? how? and people always say the southern US has the infrastructure to handle it but they never elaborate on infrastructure. like are US hospitals better at treating heat exhaustion? but why is anyone even getting to that point? i don’t know anyone who’s ever actually been to a real doctor for heat exhaustion, even in 100+ F weather. every time i google this they’re like “the heat causes cardiovascular problems” which does not explain.

[radjoy]

okay i totally get that heat waves in england/northern europe are a problem. i do. i know climate change is a huge deal, i know people have died, i’m not making fun, this isn’t me being a snippy american. i just… literally do not understand how? what are people dying from? heatstroke? in like 95F weather? how? and people always say the southern US has the infrastructure to handle it but they never elaborate on infrastructure. like are US hospitals better at treating heat exhaustion? but why is anyone even getting to that point? i don’t know anyone who’s ever actually been to a real doctor for heat exhaustion, even in 100+ F weather. every time i google this they’re like “the heat causes cardiovascular problems” which does not explain.

[radjoy]

Thinking about that Ruth Bader Ginsburg quote that's like "When I'm sometimes asked when will there be enough [women on the Supreme Court] and I say, 'When there are nine,' people are shocked. But there'd been nine men, and nobody's ever raised a question about that." You can apply this to everything, from members of governments to the authors whose books you read. Men are centered almost everywhere and have been for years. Equality doesn't have to be 50% men and 50% women. It can be 100% women to balance the decades when it was 100% men. Choose women's liberation and choose only women.

[radjoy]

Social media is not a fucking community !!! ✋️ Tumblr is not activism and ur blog isn't revolutionizing shit omg please ... some of u guys might as well be standing in the middle of a supermarket shouting at randos coming in and out about how they're fucking up the Food Lion community for abandoning carts in the middle of the entrance . In fact, doing that irl would be a lot more useful than treating tumblr like a realistic substitute for actual community or activism 🤷🏼‍♀️

[radjoy]

You remember how a journalist unilaterally decided to give me a new name—Mrs. Husband's Surname—on learning that I was married, and how I asked him to stop because that was not my name. I will never forget the smoldering hostility from some Nigerian women in response to this. It is interesting that there was more hostility, in general, from women than from men, many of whom insisted on calling me what was not my name, as though to silence my voice.

I wondered about that, and thought that perhaps for many of them, my choice represented a challenge to their idea of what is the norm.

Even some friends made statements like "You are successful and so it is okay to keep your name." Which made me wonder: Why does a woman have to be successful at work in order to justify keeping her name?

The truth is that I have not kept my name because I am successful. Had I not had the good fortune to be published and widely read, I would still have kept my name. I have kept my name because it is my name. I have kept my name because I like my name.

There are people who say "Well, your name is also about patriarchy because it is your father's name." Indeed. But the point is simply this: Whether it came from my father or from the moon, it is the name that I have had since I was born, the name with which I traveled my life's milestones, the name I have answered to since that first day I went to kindergarten on a hazy morning and my teacher said, "Answer 'present' if you hear your name. Number one: “Adichie!”

-Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, Dear Ijeawele, or, A Feminist Manifesto in Fifteen Suggestions

[radjoy]

[radjoy]

came across a reddit thread in which a bunch of men discussed a video game where the player can punish or reward little nonhuman creatures in order to train them, and someone said it disturbed him to learn that some players punish the creatures more than is needed, because they (the players) just seem to enjoy it. this triggered a debate on whether it’s unethical or no big deal to hurt virtual creatures who don’t feel pain and aren’t sentient, and the consensus was that it’s wrong, because it’s not about whether the creature feels pain or minds being punished, it’s about the fact that the player enjoys doing this to them and that means something is wrong with him

what are the odds that this random sample of men on reddit are anti-prostitution activists and tell their male friends there’s something wrong with them if they watch porn? lol their thread literally sounded like a radfem post about how it doesn’t matter if a woman in porn / prostitution / bdsm consents to what’s being done to her or claims to enjoy being degraded, it’s about men’s enjoyment of practices that degrade and hurt women, and what it means. turns out men perfectly understand the concept, they just don’t think it applies to these topics because they feel more empathy towards nonsentient nonhuman video game creatures than towards women

[radjoy]

SOMETIMES tik tok is good

[radjoy]

get his ass

[radjoy]

I love that as a bisexual enby, I fucking terrify TERFs. I’ll fuck any consenting adult I find cute, and I’m living my best life as a they/them.

I have zero gender essentialism, and that’s the scariest thing you can do to a TERF. 

[radjoy]

I've encountered a strangely large number of stories online of single men who decide to test the theory that married men are inherently more desirable to women by buying a fake wedding ring and wearing it. They usually report that this works miraculously, women are far friendlier and more approachable, which is immediately interpreted as flirting. The conclusion they draw from the data is that women are inherently cruel, selfish and greedy, because clearly they don't want the man unless they think they're stealing from some other woman.

I wonder how many of these women in these experiments actually just thought they don't need to be wary about this man mistaking friendliness for flirting, since clearly he's not looking to date as he's already making someone else miserable.

[radjoy]

yes being a teenage girl can be incredibly alienating and lonely and searching for an identity through self-expression can help with that but my god if i was 15 and the entire internet was telling me i needed to be a clean girl or a vanilla girl or a coquette girl or a coastal girl that i should wear gold hoops and slicked back hair and an oversized blazer that i should buy matching pink workout sets to be a pilates princess that i should get a 400 dollar ralph lauren sweater for the ‘old money’ aesthetic that a nose job is a rite of passage that buccal fat removal is a great idea that the kardashians are removing their bbls and heroin chic is back that i need to dissect every single aspect of my personality and make sure it conforms to a label just to make me more palatable and more cute and more trendy i think i’d run into the woods and never come back

[radjoy]

[radjoy]

i don't think it's misogynistic if a woman hates a female character that was written by the minds of woman-hating men. it's not internalised misogyny, it's a normal reaction to seeing your sex being portrayed as less capable and less intelligent than the men around her

[radjoy]

[radjoy]

I wanna get with feminism but i'm only 22 and it's hard to imagine having anything in common with women older than me 😭😭 Like every woman older than 35 is always miserable and mean-spirited wtf how are you supposed to find community with ppl like that??

I don’t even know how to answer this. Like I want to be encouraging to you but I find this really demeaning and insulting. you have those thoughts because you’ve been conditioned to hate women and perceive women as bitches and nags and to by hyper vigilant observer of women’s flaws. you’ll have to start with yourself because age 35 is coming for you whether you like it or not