Tumgik
reidscanehand · 1 month
Text
…. DramaSchool!Remus one shot based on sexy dream I just had?
too much? we hate? we like?
12 notes · View notes
reidscanehand · 3 months
Note
hey lovely i just wanted to say i loved you remus fics they’re so cute!!
You’re so sweet - I’m so glad you’ve enjoyed them! xx
0 notes
reidscanehand · 4 months
Text
Just a Trifle
Remus Lupin x fem!Reader
Fluff
TW: insecurity in relationships
Tumblr media
It’s still odd to stay the night.
You’re not quite the girlfriend, but not quite…anything else. The two of you stopped seeing other people long ago, months ago now, though it feels longer. He teases you, touches you, kisses you seemingly whenever he can, but…you’re not his girlfriend. At least he hasn’t said and you haven’t asked. And it feels silly and stupid and immature to wait for it, to even want to, or, rather, need to call him something…to make him yours, feels silly. But still.
You don’t live here, though there are pieces of you, like demarcations of your existence all over the place. A cushion the two of you purchased together that you’d meant to take back to yours, but had looked just as sweet on his couch, especially the morning after the two of you used it to prop up your head as you laid on the sofa and he laid in your lap, playing with his hair until the both of you were asleep. Or the coffee creamer in the fridge; Remus takes his coffee black, so it could only be yours. Or the toothbrush in the travel case next to his in the cabinet, purchased just for you. Even the hand soap in the bathroom - ginger mandarin, another shopping date find - served as a symbol of your presence in his life.
And now it’s Christmas. Christmas Day had been spent with your respective families only for the two of you to end up back at Rem’s. Frankly, it’s been weeks since you were home. Every time you return, your flat is like a living memory, forgotten oranges rotting in the fruit bowl on the counter, bread going stale, always cold even when it isn’t cold outside because you turn the heating off. You don’t really live there, not anymore. Most of your clothes live at Rem’s, space in his drawers opening up, seemingly if it’s own accord. It had all felt so natural…so why can’t you ask?
It’s as though he’s determined not to notice your predicament. There’s no way he can’t, though. Right? The two of you sit on the couch with the cute pillow, the tv quietly playing “It’s a Wonderful Life”. You know he’s not really watching, he’s probably asleep with your fingers running through his hair - it’s his favorite thing in the world or so he says. Suddenly he sits up and kisses your nose as he is wont to do.
“I can hear your brain moving, bun,” he whispers affectionately, as though unwilling to interrupt the film. “I know we didn’t really talk about presents, but I got you something.” He stands briefly and walks over to the cabinet he keeps coats in near the door. The top is out of both of your reach, but he tips on his toes and blindly reaches until he pulls down a small, shabbily wrapped little box.
“Just a trifle,” he assures you in his quietly formal way. You stand rather than take the gift right away.
“Good thing I got you something, too,” you laugh quietly, suddenly shy. You go into the bedroom and reach into your overnight bag, long since unpacked and taking up space in the closet. You’d hidden the gift in there, deciding to keep it for his birthday if the two of you didn’t exchange gifts.
“On the count of three,” Remus states almost mischievously as he takes the small gift bag from you and hands you the small box. He counts and the two of you open. His is swifter, it’s in a bag after all, requiring less effort.
“Oh, thank you, doll,” he says softly, his mind clearly elsewhere even as he admires the record you’d picked out. But you can’t say anything. Because inside the tiny box is a small, thin key. Imprinted on the key is “3B”. That’s this apartment. This is a key to his apartment. You hear Rem take a deep breath, your gaze still locked on the key.
“It’s taken me too long,” he practically whispers, Jimmy Stewart’s voice still whirring from the telly a good deal louder. “And you’ve…you’ve been far too kind about it, really.”
“Not too kind,” you whisper, surprising yourself. “Never too kind for you.”
Remus smiles and pulls you to him, crushing the key between the two of you. “See? Far too good for me you are.”
“Too good to be…what exactly?” you ask, dreading the feeling of it leaving your mouth.
“To be mine,” he responds, his voice firm. “To be my girlfriend, my partner…I want you to live here. With me. As long as you’ll have me.”
You beam into his chest, your heart thundering.
“Just a trifle?” you giggle, looking up at him. He smiles down at you, pressing ever closer, eyeing your mouth.
“You know, a trifle? An ultimate token of my love an affection? A symbol of my need to have you near me forever?” he laughs as your eyes grow wide. “Whatever you want it to be.”
“I want it to be…I want it to be a step.”
“A step?” he asks, eyes flicking between your mouth and eyes, arms still holding you close.
“A step to forever,” you say, voice just as sure as his now. “That okay?”
“That’s perfect,” he replies, “perfect, my love.”
~~~
Happy Holidays xx
303 notes · View notes
reidscanehand · 4 months
Text
Just a Trifle
Remus Lupin x fem!Reader
Fluff
TW: insecurity in relationships
Tumblr media
It’s still odd to stay the night.
You’re not quite the girlfriend, but not quite…anything else. The two of you stopped seeing other people long ago, months ago now, though it feels longer. He teases you, touches you, kisses you seemingly whenever he can, but…you’re not his girlfriend. At least he hasn’t said and you haven’t asked. And it feels silly and stupid and immature to wait for it, to even want to, or, rather, need to call him something…to make him yours, feels silly. But still.
You don’t live here, though there are pieces of you, like demarcations of your existence all over the place. A cushion the two of you purchased together that you’d meant to take back to yours, but had looked just as sweet on his couch, especially the morning after the two of you used it to prop up your head as you laid on the sofa and he laid in your lap, playing with his hair until the both of you were asleep. Or the coffee creamer in the fridge; Remus takes his coffee black, so it could only be yours. Or the toothbrush in the travel case next to his in the cabinet, purchased just for you. Even the hand soap in the bathroom - ginger mandarin, another shopping date find - served as a symbol of your presence in his life.
And now it’s Christmas. Christmas Day had been spent with your respective families only for the two of you to end up back at Rem’s. Frankly, it’s been weeks since you were home. Every time you return, your flat is like a living memory, forgotten oranges rotting in the fruit bowl on the counter, bread going stale, always cold even when it isn’t cold outside because you turn the heating off. You don’t really live there, not anymore. Most of your clothes live at Rem’s, space in his drawers opening up, seemingly if it’s own accord. It had all felt so natural…so why can’t you ask?
It’s as though he’s determined not to notice your predicament. There’s no way he can’t, though. Right? The two of you sit on the couch with the cute pillow, the tv quietly playing “It’s a Wonderful Life”. You know he’s not really watching, he’s probably asleep with your fingers running through his hair - it’s his favorite thing in the world or so he says. Suddenly he sits up and kisses your nose as he is wont to do.
“I can hear your brain moving, bun,” he whispers affectionately, as though unwilling to interrupt the film. “I know we didn’t really talk about presents, but I got you something.” He stands briefly and walks over to the cabinet he keeps coats in near the door. The top is out of both of your reach, but he tips on his toes and blindly reaches until he pulls down a small, shabbily wrapped little box.
“Just a trifle,” he assures you in his quietly formal way. You stand rather than take the gift right away.
“Good thing I got you something, too,” you laugh quietly, suddenly shy. You go into the bedroom and reach into your overnight bag, long since unpacked and taking up space in the closet. You’d hidden the gift in there, deciding to keep it for his birthday if the two of you didn’t exchange gifts.
“On the count of three,” Remus states almost mischievously as he takes the small gift bag from you and hands you the small box. He counts and the two of you open. His is swifter, it’s in a bag after all, requiring less effort.
“Oh, thank you, doll,” he says softly, his mind clearly elsewhere even as he admires the record you’d picked out. But you can’t say anything. Because inside the tiny box is a small, thin key. Imprinted on the key is “3B”. That’s this apartment. This is a key to his apartment. You hear Rem take a deep breath, your gaze still locked on the key.
“It’s taken me too long,” he practically whispers, Jimmy Stewart’s voice still whirring from the telly a good deal louder. “And you’ve…you’ve been far too kind about it, really.”
“Not too kind,” you whisper, surprising yourself. “Never too kind for you.”
Remus smiles and pulls you to him, crushing the key between the two of you. “See? Far too good for me you are.”
“Too good to be…what exactly?” you ask, dreading the feeling of it leaving your mouth.
“To be mine,” he responds, his voice firm. “To be my girlfriend, my partner…I want you to live here. With me. As long as you’ll have me.”
You beam into his chest, your heart thundering.
“Just a trifle?” you giggle, looking up at him. He smiles down at you, pressing ever closer, eyeing your mouth.
“You know, a trifle? An ultimate token of my love an affection? A symbol of my need to have you near me forever?” he laughs as your eyes grow wide. “Whatever you want it to be.”
“I want it to be…I want it to be a step.”
“A step?” he asks, eyes flicking between your mouth and eyes, arms still holding you close.
“A step to forever,” you say, voice just as sure as his now. “That okay?”
“That’s perfect,” he replies, “perfect, my love.”
~~~
Happy Holidays xx
303 notes · View notes
reidscanehand · 6 months
Note
thanks, babes xx
hope you like it, anon!!
Have you seen an established relationship spencer fic where they go undercover in a regency roleplay house thingy while spencer has his thing with maeve and reader thinks hes cheating and reader gets kidnapped by the unsub but in the end they made up? Also i remember a tiny detail about reader being good with accents lol I cant seem to find it and its alright if you havent seen it lmao thank you🫡🫡🫂
Hi! Unfortunately that doesn't ring a bell. Maybe one of my followers knows!
11 notes · View notes
reidscanehand · 7 months
Text
The only consistent thing about criminal minds is that I’m pretty sure every bathroom scene is shot on the exact same set
16 notes · View notes
reidscanehand · 7 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Pride and Prejudice (2005) + tumblr posts (part 1)
27K notes · View notes
reidscanehand · 8 months
Text
The Goodness, Love
Song Fic Inspired by the line: "Do you know I could break beneath the weight of the goodness, love, I still carry for you?" from 'Unknown/Nth' by Hozier Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x BAUfem! Reader Category: Angst/Fluff TW: mentions of when Hotch and Jack were in witsec due to threats from Mr. Scratch, insecurities, cursing, consumption of alcohol by legal adults
Tumblr media
~ "Do you know I could crash beneath the weight of the goodness, love, I still carry for you?" - Hozier ~
Having to stay in hiding due to the threat of Peter Lewis wasn't the ideal way to go about it, but it did mean that Aaron Hotchner got to finally be a stay-at-home dad to Jack. And, despite the fact that Peter Lewis was no longer a threat, the benefit of the time in WITSEC meant that Aaron was able to realize that that was exactly the life that he wanted to be living. Fortunately, his team being the amazing family that they are, completely understood. In fact, David Rossi insisted upon throwing him a going-away party. Rossi's house is stunning, as always, and the team really loves any opportunity to dress up and celebrate.
"Proud of you, you know?" Rossi says as he hands Aaron a whiskey soda.
"For finally retiring?" Aaron asks, smiling and taking the drink.
"For recognizing when it's healthy to step away," Emily Prentiss answers for Rossi, stepping up to the two of them.
"You're just saying that because you're in charge now," Aaron jokes.
Emily laughs and grins, "A little bit, but, no, really, boss. It's good for you. You look healthier than you have in years."
"Yeah?" Aaron nods. Emily is called away by Will and Aaron mutters to himself, "I wish everyone thought that."
"She definitely does, Aaron," David replies quietly, glancing as nonchalantly as possible over to you.
You, who hasn't yet spoken to Aaron other than a small wave and a "hi" when he'd gone into the office to formally resign. But you haven't spoken, not really. You'd entered the party - looking, in Aaron's opinion, rather ridiculously stunning in a deep, crimson summer evening dress that fits you just right, the just above ankle length skirt's ends fluttering in the breeze every so often - and murmured a shy and deeply impersonal, "congratulations, Hotch" before moving to the drinks table with JJ and Will. And this would've been entirely innocuous if you hadn't called him "Hotch".
Hotch.
Not what you'd typically call him. Not what he wants you to call him. No, he wants to return to the fondness and closeness the two of you had when he was on the team. But he doesn't know how to do that. And it seems as though you might not want to. He wasn't your boyfriend...he wasn't even close to that, but GOD he'd wanted to be. He still wants to be. He'd be happy to hold you in any capacity you'd be comfortable with, but this? This awkward and uncomfortable avoidance...this abject silence on which you've landed... It's almost too much to bear. Ever since they’d gone into WITSEC, Aaron’s heart had felt heavy. He’d thought it was because of Peter Lewis, but it’s still heavy now that they’re out of hiding. He's thrilled - beyond thrilled, really - to become a stay-at-home dad, but he knows he's leaving a whole lifetime of things behind. And if that includes you? He's not sure he'll be able to live with it.
"Hey," Spencer says, entering Dave's backyard. "Sorry, I'm late." Spencer gives Aaron a small hug and hands Dave a bottle of wine he brought.
"No worries," Dave assures him. "Tara's still running late."
"I'm sure," Spencer nods knowingly, straightening his navy blue cardigan, "traffic's dreadful."
"Hey, Spencer," you call jovially, waving to him from next to JJ. He beams and crosses to you, wrapping you in a huge hug.
And the ever so slight intimacy of this, the fact that he feels as though he could kill for a greeting like that from you makes Aaron almost throw up.
~~~
"Wondered where you'd run off to," your voice interrupts his thoughts. Aaron turns from where he's sitting, poised on the end of Dave's desk, staring out at his gorgeous view. The lawn, where the rest of the party was still taking place, wasn't visible from this window, which meant no one could see Aaron either, as he intended.
"I just, um, needed a breather," he lies uncomfortably. He feels like a coward for running away, but he could almost feel himself turning green as you greeted Spencer and then Tara with more affection than he dared to hope for since your slight coldness toward him had started. And a lawn full of profilers was hardly the audience to attempt to hide from.
"Sure," you say, and he tries not to take in your every move as you cross into the room, sitting down at Dave's desk, Aaron's back almost entirely to you. Neither of you says anything and it's just long enough that it would be almost more uncomfortable to break the silence.
Still, the silence feels like drowning. He wishes you could anchor him somehow. He can feel you staring at him, but can't bring himself to turn and face you. He needs you, but he almost can't bear it. He can't remember an uncomfortable silence with you because there never were any. Moments between the two of you were filled with work - he honestly had felt as though you could read his mind when the two of you were solving cases together - or easy conversation and laughter - he'd never known such a simple, straightforward comfort with anyone - or comfortable, companionable silence. Completely unlike this.
"It's a little odd, though," you break the silence, your voice, if Aaron's not mistaken, nearly cracking with the effort.
"What is?" he asks, barely looking over his shoulder, not sure his heart can make it if he sees you.
"You needing a breather from the people you're leaving behind," you almost whisper.
His brain is fully in control, ignoring the panging of his heart as he stands and turns to face you.
"Leaving behind?" he almost sputters.
You look away from him, biting your lip. You look almost ashamed, "Sorry, that's unfair."
"I'm not-"
You continue like he isn't speaking, standing from Dave's desk, still not looking Aaron in the eyes, "I know that Peter Lewis was...beyond anything really. And I know that Jack is the most important thing in the world and should be that's not wrong of you, and-"
Aaron crosses to your side of the desk, trying to "I'm not leav-"
"And I know that you have always gone above and beyond in this position and I know that you have lost...you have lost so much more than you deserved to lose, but-"
He steps closer, "I'm not leaving-"
"But...it's so terribly, terribly selfish of me, but Hotch I can't bear the thought of the BAU without you and...and while you were gone, it was hell. I was so worried about you and...and..."
You stop, taking a staggering breath. Aaron stops, just a breath away from you now.
"Aaron," he whispers when you don't start speaking again.
Your eyes, previously determinedly staring at his shoes, immediately jump to meet his own, "What?"
"You call me Aaron," he explains. "Not Hotch, never Hotch. Not from you, I can't...I can't bear it from you."
You swallow, but don't look away, "I...I couldn't call you Aaron. Not while you were gone."
"Why?" he asks, his hands itching to pull you to him, to take your hands, anything.
"Because," you rasp, a small tear falling down your cheek, "if something bad happened to you, I would never have to say that something bad happened to Aaron...to my Aaron."
"Your Aaron?" he asks, his voice barely above a breath, reaching up and wiping another tear as it rolls down your cheek, his hands awkwardly returning to his sides when he’s done.
"Yes," you reply. "And...now that you're leaving I can...it's so stupid, but I don't have to goodbye to...to my Aaron."
He stares down at you, not quite sure how to say what he needs to and knowing full well he can’t get through it without crying.
“I’m not leaving…” he starts, trailing off because he is leaving the BAU, but he begins again fairly easily, shocking for how heavy his heart feels, “I mean I’m leaving-I’m leaving the BAU. But I-I’m not leaving you. If you don’t want me to, that is.”
You stare at him, eyes wide as though you hadn’t expected it. Aaron doubles down, finding the strength to take your hands despite the shaking of his own.
“Because the thing is,” he continues, his voice barely above a whisper, so quiet he almost can’t hear it over how loud his heart is beating. “The thing is…is that I-I really rather like the idea of being yours. A-and if it suits you…I want you to be mine, too.”
You’re quiet still for only a moment before a tiny smile breaks over your lips, “Really?”
“Of course,” he sighs, his hands rushing to cup your jaw, “I-I’m so sorry I didn’t make that clear, but I would…I don’t think I’d be happy without you in my life.”
“I thought you…” you trail off, looking slightly embarrassed. “I was sure you’d forget about me.”
“Forget about you?” Aaron nearly laughs. “Oh, oh my girl, my heart would never let me forget you. It’s been carrying on without you for too long.”
You stare at him, a huge smile growing on your lips, “Well, then… I guess we’ll have to fix that.”
And as your lips brush against his for the first time, it’s as though the weight is finally lifted and Aaron’s heart feels lighter than it has in months.
~~~
~ You were like an angel to me.” - Hozier ~
Taglist: @shadyladyperfection @cielo1984 @rainsong01 @pessimystic-fangirl @saspencereid @andreasworlsboring101 @avidreider @aizawaxkun @babyspencersslut @no-honey-no  @andrewhoezierbyrne @subhuman-queer @ncsls0515  @uhuhuh @whatamidoinghp @spongeshxt  @itsametaphorbriansblog @vgirl-10123  @stand-tall-pineapple  @padsfirewhisky @ceeellewrites @dahliasbouqet @drayshadow @cal-ifornication-blog @theetherealbloom  @eevee0722 @questionmymentality @wintermuteway @ellesmythe @mac99martin @ssa-githae @cherrystay @calm-and-doctor @icedcoffee187 @devilswaldorf @annemijnisdancing @half-blood-dork @blameitonthenight21 @happyreid187 @goldeng1rl8 @meangirlsx @honestlystop @lastpasttheposts @avengers-ass-emble17 @bauhousewife @averyhotchner @underscorecourt  @fan-girl-97 @coolbeans3 @boxofsparklingmuses @allaboutsml  @ssareidbby @percabethfangirl @buckyluvbot @v-is-obsessive @tanyaherondale @usuck @mitchiri-nek0  @kaitlynpcallmebeepme @miraclesoflove @meganskane @babymetaldoll @ivebeenthinkingboutu @rockin2thebeats @infinite-tides @onlyhereforthefanfics  @g-l-pierce @thisiscalm-andits-doctor @art-and-thoughts @exhaleli @allthecolorsneverseen @measure-in-pain @acidicbloody @hotchnerxo @her-storybooks  @skyewardolicitycloisdelena91 @bilesxbilinskixlahey @wilbur-rabbit @twilightlover2007 @ssamorganhotchner @h0tch-r0cket @wheelsupkels @jhiddles03 @lovesammikinzz @scargarcia-magshotchner @chaoticconnoisseurgiver @baueoud @mischiefmanaged71 @gspenc @spottedzebrasinpartyhats @kajjaka @chickensrule  @marvel-mars @wanniiieeee @gublur  @rousethemouse @unionjackpillow  @thisiscalmanditsdoctorreid @meowiemari​
325 notes · View notes
reidscanehand · 8 months
Text
The Goodness, Love
Song Fic Inspired by the line: "Do you know I could break beneath the weight of the goodness, love, I still carry for you?" from 'Unknown/Nth' by Hozier Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x BAUfem! Reader Category: Angst/Fluff TW: mentions of when Hotch and Jack were in witsec due to threats from Mr. Scratch, insecurities, cursing, consumption of alcohol by legal adults
Tumblr media
~ "Do you know I could crash beneath the weight of the goodness, love, I still carry for you?" - Hozier ~
Having to stay in hiding due to the threat of Peter Lewis wasn't the ideal way to go about it, but it did mean that Aaron Hotchner got to finally be a stay-at-home dad to Jack. And, despite the fact that Peter Lewis was no longer a threat, the benefit of the time in WITSEC meant that Aaron was able to realize that that was exactly the life that he wanted to be living. Fortunately, his team being the amazing family that they are, completely understood. In fact, David Rossi insisted upon throwing him a going-away party. Rossi's house is stunning, as always, and the team really loves any opportunity to dress up and celebrate.
"Proud of you, you know?" Rossi says as he hands Aaron a whiskey soda.
"For finally retiring?" Aaron asks, smiling and taking the drink.
"For recognizing when it's healthy to step away," Emily Prentiss answers for Rossi, stepping up to the two of them.
"You're just saying that because you're in charge now," Aaron jokes.
Emily laughs and grins, "A little bit, but, no, really, boss. It's good for you. You look healthier than you have in years."
"Yeah?" Aaron nods. Emily is called away by Will and Aaron mutters to himself, "I wish everyone thought that."
"She definitely does, Aaron," David replies quietly, glancing as nonchalantly as possible over to you.
You, who hasn't yet spoken to Aaron other than a small wave and a "hi" when he'd gone into the office to formally resign. But you haven't spoken, not really. You'd entered the party - looking, in Aaron's opinion, rather ridiculously stunning in a deep, crimson summer evening dress that fits you just right, the just above ankle length skirt's ends fluttering in the breeze every so often - and murmured a shy and deeply impersonal, "congratulations, Hotch" before moving to the drinks table with JJ and Will. And this would've been entirely innocuous if you hadn't called him "Hotch".
Hotch.
Not what you'd typically call him. Not what he wants you to call him. No, he wants to return to the fondness and closeness the two of you had when he was on the team. But he doesn't know how to do that. And it seems as though you might not want to. He wasn't your boyfriend...he wasn't even close to that, but GOD he'd wanted to be. He still wants to be. He'd be happy to hold you in any capacity you'd be comfortable with, but this? This awkward and uncomfortable avoidance...this abject silence on which you've landed... It's almost too much to bear. Ever since they’d gone into WITSEC, Aaron’s heart had felt heavy. He’d thought it was because of Peter Lewis, but it’s still heavy now that they’re out of hiding. He's thrilled - beyond thrilled, really - to become a stay-at-home dad, but he knows he's leaving a whole lifetime of things behind. And if that includes you? He's not sure he'll be able to live with it.
"Hey," Spencer says, entering Dave's backyard. "Sorry, I'm late." Spencer gives Aaron a small hug and hands Dave a bottle of wine he brought.
"No worries," Dave assures him. "Tara's still running late."
"I'm sure," Spencer nods knowingly, straightening his navy blue cardigan, "traffic's dreadful."
"Hey, Spencer," you call jovially, waving to him from next to JJ. He beams and crosses to you, wrapping you in a huge hug.
And the ever so slight intimacy of this, the fact that he feels as though he could kill for a greeting like that from you makes Aaron almost throw up.
~~~
"Wondered where you'd run off to," your voice interrupts his thoughts. Aaron turns from where he's sitting, poised on the end of Dave's desk, staring out at his gorgeous view. The lawn, where the rest of the party was still taking place, wasn't visible from this window, which meant no one could see Aaron either, as he intended.
"I just, um, needed a breather," he lies uncomfortably. He feels like a coward for running away, but he could almost feel himself turning green as you greeted Spencer and then Tara with more affection than he dared to hope for since your slight coldness toward him had started. And a lawn full of profilers was hardly the audience to attempt to hide from.
"Sure," you say, and he tries not to take in your every move as you cross into the room, sitting down at Dave's desk, Aaron's back almost entirely to you. Neither of you says anything and it's just long enough that it would be almost more uncomfortable to break the silence.
Still, the silence feels like drowning. He wishes you could anchor him somehow. He can feel you staring at him, but can't bring himself to turn and face you. He needs you, but he almost can't bear it. He can't remember an uncomfortable silence with you because there never were any. Moments between the two of you were filled with work - he honestly had felt as though you could read his mind when the two of you were solving cases together - or easy conversation and laughter - he'd never known such a simple, straightforward comfort with anyone - or comfortable, companionable silence. Completely unlike this.
"It's a little odd, though," you break the silence, your voice, if Aaron's not mistaken, nearly cracking with the effort.
"What is?" he asks, barely looking over his shoulder, not sure his heart can make it if he sees you.
"You needing a breather from the people you're leaving behind," you almost whisper.
His brain is fully in control, ignoring the panging of his heart as he stands and turns to face you.
"Leaving behind?" he almost sputters.
You look away from him, biting your lip. You look almost ashamed, "Sorry, that's unfair."
"I'm not-"
You continue like he isn't speaking, standing from Dave's desk, still not looking Aaron in the eyes, "I know that Peter Lewis was...beyond anything really. And I know that Jack is the most important thing in the world and should be that's not wrong of you, and-"
Aaron crosses to your side of the desk, trying to "I'm not leav-"
"And I know that you have always gone above and beyond in this position and I know that you have lost...you have lost so much more than you deserved to lose, but-"
He steps closer, "I'm not leaving-"
"But...it's so terribly, terribly selfish of me, but Hotch I can't bear the thought of the BAU without you and...and while you were gone, it was hell. I was so worried about you and...and..."
You stop, taking a staggering breath. Aaron stops, just a breath away from you now.
"Aaron," he whispers when you don't start speaking again.
Your eyes, previously determinedly staring at his shoes, immediately jump to meet his own, "What?"
"You call me Aaron," he explains. "Not Hotch, never Hotch. Not from you, I can't...I can't bear it from you."
You swallow, but don't look away, "I...I couldn't call you Aaron. Not while you were gone."
"Why?" he asks, his hands itching to pull you to him, to take your hands, anything.
"Because," you rasp, a small tear falling down your cheek, "if something bad happened to you, I would never have to say that something bad happened to Aaron...to my Aaron."
"Your Aaron?" he asks, his voice barely above a breath, reaching up and wiping another tear as it rolls down your cheek, his hands awkwardly returning to his sides when he’s done.
"Yes," you reply. "And...now that you're leaving I can...it's so stupid, but I don't have to goodbye to...to my Aaron."
He stares down at you, not quite sure how to say what he needs to and knowing full well he can’t get through it without crying.
“I’m not leaving…” he starts, trailing off because he is leaving the BAU, but he begins again fairly easily, shocking for how heavy his heart feels, “I mean I’m leaving-I’m leaving the BAU. But I-I’m not leaving you. If you don’t want me to, that is.”
You stare at him, eyes wide as though you hadn’t expected it. Aaron doubles down, finding the strength to take your hands despite the shaking of his own.
“Because the thing is,” he continues, his voice barely above a whisper, so quiet he almost can’t hear it over how loud his heart is beating. “The thing is…is that I-I really rather like the idea of being yours. A-and if it suits you…I want you to be mine, too.”
You’re quiet still for only a moment before a tiny smile breaks over your lips, “Really?”
“Of course,” he sighs, his hands rushing to cup your jaw, “I-I’m so sorry I didn’t make that clear, but I would…I don’t think I’d be happy without you in my life.”
“I thought you…” you trail off, looking slightly embarrassed. “I was sure you’d forget about me.”
“Forget about you?” Aaron nearly laughs. “Oh, oh my girl, my heart would never let me forget you. It’s been carrying on without you for too long.”
You stare at him, a huge smile growing on your lips, “Well, then… I guess we’ll have to fix that.”
And as your lips brush against his for the first time, it’s as though the weight is finally lifted and Aaron’s heart feels lighter than it has in months.
~~~
~ You were like an angel to me.” - Hozier ~
Taglist: @shadyladyperfection @cielo1984 @rainsong01 @pessimystic-fangirl @saspencereid @andreasworlsboring101 @avidreider @aizawaxkun @babyspencersslut @no-honey-no  @andrewhoezierbyrne @subhuman-queer @ncsls0515  @uhuhuh @whatamidoinghp @spongeshxt  @itsametaphorbriansblog @vgirl-10123  @stand-tall-pineapple  @padsfirewhisky @ceeellewrites @dahliasbouqet @drayshadow @cal-ifornication-blog @theetherealbloom  @eevee0722 @questionmymentality @wintermuteway @ellesmythe @mac99martin @ssa-githae @cherrystay @calm-and-doctor @icedcoffee187 @devilswaldorf @annemijnisdancing @half-blood-dork @blameitonthenight21 @happyreid187 @goldeng1rl8 @meangirlsx @honestlystop @lastpasttheposts @avengers-ass-emble17 @bauhousewife @averyhotchner @underscorecourt  @fan-girl-97 @coolbeans3 @boxofsparklingmuses @allaboutsml  @ssareidbby @percabethfangirl @buckyluvbot @v-is-obsessive @tanyaherondale @usuck @mitchiri-nek0  @kaitlynpcallmebeepme @miraclesoflove @meganskane @babymetaldoll @ivebeenthinkingboutu @rockin2thebeats @infinite-tides @onlyhereforthefanfics  @g-l-pierce @thisiscalm-andits-doctor @art-and-thoughts @exhaleli @allthecolorsneverseen @measure-in-pain @acidicbloody @hotchnerxo @her-storybooks  @skyewardolicitycloisdelena91 @bilesxbilinskixlahey @wilbur-rabbit @twilightlover2007 @ssamorganhotchner @h0tch-r0cket @wheelsupkels @jhiddles03 @lovesammikinzz @scargarcia-magshotchner @chaoticconnoisseurgiver @baueoud @mischiefmanaged71 @gspenc @spottedzebrasinpartyhats @kajjaka @chickensrule  @marvel-mars @wanniiieeee @gublur  @rousethemouse @unionjackpillow  @thisiscalmanditsdoctorreid @meowiemari​
325 notes · View notes
reidscanehand · 8 months
Note
i think if i knew you irl i would want to be your bestfriend
this is the sweetest 🥹
ditto, lovely xx
0 notes
reidscanehand · 8 months
Text
I Remember Halloween
Tumblr media
Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!Reader
Category: Fluff/Comfort
Warnings: mentions of burnout and anxieties
Based on a single tiktok and this song
~ More and more I’ll catalogue my doubts ~
You could see the signs. Hell, you’d always been able to see the signs. Even when you and Spencer weren’t dating and were just co-workers, you’d been able to see the signs. You don’t see how anyone could miss any of Spencer’s tells, honestly, though he was terribly good at masking them when he wanted to. However, since semi-retiring from the BAU and focusing more on teaching, Spencer had been less careful, less guarded. It would annoy him if you said so, but you delighted in it - the openness, the guard finally down fully. Suffice it to say that when your adorable husband came home two weeks in a row, exhausted even after only teaching one class, you recognized it as burnout, even if he didn’t. Or wouldn’t - self care had never been Spencer’s strong suit. Which is why the element of surprise is entirely necessary, no matter how drastic it may feel. It was incredibly helpful that, despite living through a pandemic working in education and being a genius, your husband still is an abysmally precious mess when it comes to technology.
You’d originally thought to do a Friday, but with various friend and family celebrations almost every weekend until the end of the year, it made more sense - and frankly made it more fun - to cancel Spencer’s classes for a day and play hooky a little.
It’s a bright and slightly rainy Thursday morning - random, but purposefully so - in September. Your husband’s alarm goes off and he leans over, pressing a kiss to your temple, before getting up and taking a shower. Every so often, you’d join him in the shower, but not today. Today you get up and head to the kitchen.
You’d loved Spencer’s old apartment, but when the two of you moved in together, especially after the events of his last few somewhat traumatizing years with the BAU, a change felt necessary. The two bedroom, two bath bungalow you two found just outside of Stafford, Virginia was just as charming as Spencer’s old place. Antique, but modern enough to have better security than his old building (he is understandably a stickler for safety). The kitchen features windows looking out into your small backyard, Spencer planted a tree last year and you’re sure it was in order to watch the leaves change as fall arrives. The tips of the leaves are just beginning to yellow, the light rain a perfect background for the day you have planned. You turn on the stove and oven and open the fridge, pulling out a can of pumpkin spice cinnamon rolls and the package of turkey bacon. You begin cooking and you can hear your husband start getting ready and, just as you thought it would, the smell of the food draws him away from his typical morning routine (get dressed, make coffee, grab a granola bar if he remembers to) and brings him to the kitchen.
“Is there a reason,” he asks from the doorway, “that it smells…like, um-“
“Like fall?” you ask, smiling over your shoulder at him as you flip the turkey bacon in the pan. Spencer grins and you turn back to the food.
“Well, yeah,” Spencer says. “You planning a fun day alone?”
You wince a little at the small hint of jealousy you hear in his voice, thrilled that your response is, “No, not alone.”
“Oh,” he replies, a little shocked. “Is someone coming ov-“
“Nope,” you reply cheerfully, grabbing a mitt and pulling the cinnamon rolls out of the oven.
“Wait…wait, what?” Spencer questions, totally not distracted by you bending over like that.
“Come on, lovey,” you tease, turning to face him fully. “Put the pieces together.”
He stares at you for a moment and then looks almost overwhelmingly sad, “Honey, I have three classes today, I can’t-“
“About that,” you cut him off quietly. He arches a brow at you, but you cross to the end of the kitchen island, pulling out Spencer’s university laptop and opening it, clicking to his classes’ dashboard page on the school’s site and turning it around slowly, chewing on your lip just a little nervously.
“Dear Students,” Spencer reads after popping on his glasses. “Classes are cancelled until Monday due to slight illness on my part. Have a great long weekend - be sure to read ahead for Monday!”
There’s a slightly too long silence that makes you just a bit nervous.
“I know it might be a bit of an overstep, but you’ve just seemed so…so burned out lately and-“ you’re cut off as Spencer moves to stand right in front of you.
“You cancelled my classes for me?” he asks, a small smile poking at the corner of his mouth.
“Yes,” you reply.
“So that we could…do what, exactly?” He attempts to keep his smile at bay, but is nearly beaming.
“Well,” you smile, “I thought we could eat some pumpkin spice cinnamon rolls and bacon and, I don’t know, maybe get really cozy on our super comfortable couch and watch Hocus Pocus, Corpse Bride, and Practical Magic? Maybe throw in Crimson Peak if we’re still going strong?”
“Just to clarify, you realized I was burned out and decided to plan a cozy fall movie day to make me feel better?” Spencer asks, almost incredulous, wrapping his arms around your waist.
“That would be it, yes,” you nod, wrapping your arms around his neck.
“Damn,” he mutters quietly, looking down at you.
“What?” you giggle.
“Nothing,” Spencer beams, turning his head and eyeing your lips, “I just definitely married the perfect woman.”
Your laugh is quickly quashed by his lips on yours.
~ I remember Halloween. ~
Tag List: @shadyladyperfection @cielo1984 @rainsong01 @pessimystic-fangirl @saspencereid @andreasworlsboring101 @avidreider  @aizawaxkun @babyspencersslut @no-honey-no  @subhuman-queer  @uhuhuh @whatamidoinghp @spongeshxt  @itsametaphorbriansblog @vgirl-10123  @stand-tall-pineapple  @padsfirewhisky @ceeellewrites @dahliasbouqet @drayshadow @cal-ifornication-blog @theetherealbloom  @eevee0722 @questionmymentality @wintermuteway @ellesmythe @ssa-githae @cherrystay @calm-and-doctor @devilswaldorf @half-blood-dork @blameitonthenight21 @happyreid187 @goldeng1rl8 @meangirlsx @honestlystop @avengers-ass-emble17 @bauhousewife @averyhotchner @underscorecourt  @fan-girl-97 @coolbeans3 @boxofsparklingmuses @allaboutsml @percabethfangirl @buckyluvbot @v-is-obsessive @tanyaherondale @usuck @mitchiri-nek0  @kaitlynpcallmebeepme @miraclesoflove @meganskane @babymetaldoll @ivebeenthinkingboutu @rockin2thebeats @infinite-tides @onlyhereforthefanfics  @g-l-pierce @thisiscalm-andits-doctor @art-and-thoughts @exhaleli @allthecolorsneverseen @measure-in-pain @acidicbloody @hotchnerxo @her-storybooks  @skyewardolicitycloisdelena91 @bilesxbilinskixlahey @wilbur-rabbit @twilightlover2007 @ssamorganhotchner @h0tch-r0cket @wheelsupkels @jhiddles03 @lovesammikinzz @m-mhotchner @chaoticconnoisseurgiver @baueoud @mischiefmanaged71 @gspenc @spottedzebrasinpartyhats @her-storybooks @kajjaka @chickensrule  @marvel-mars @wanniiieeee @gublur @aivilovio @rousethemouse​ @unionjackpillow​
298 notes · View notes
reidscanehand · 8 months
Text
I Remember Halloween
Tumblr media
Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!Reader
Category: Fluff/Comfort
Warnings: mentions of burnout and anxieties
Based on a single tiktok and this song
~ More and more I’ll catalogue my doubts ~
You could see the signs. Hell, you’d always been able to see the signs. Even when you and Spencer weren’t dating and were just co-workers, you’d been able to see the signs. You don’t see how anyone could miss any of Spencer’s tells, honestly, though he was terribly good at masking them when he wanted to. However, since semi-retiring from the BAU and focusing more on teaching, Spencer had been less careful, less guarded. It would annoy him if you said so, but you delighted in it - the openness, the guard finally down fully. Suffice it to say that when your adorable husband came home two weeks in a row, exhausted even after only teaching one class, you recognized it as burnout, even if he didn’t. Or wouldn’t - self care had never been Spencer’s strong suit. Which is why the element of surprise is entirely necessary, no matter how drastic it may feel. It was incredibly helpful that, despite living through a pandemic working in education and being a genius, your husband still is an abysmally precious mess when it comes to technology.
You’d originally thought to do a Friday, but with various friend and family celebrations almost every weekend until the end of the year, it made more sense - and frankly made it more fun - to cancel Spencer’s classes for a day and play hooky a little.
It’s a bright and slightly rainy Thursday morning - random, but purposefully so - in September. Your husband’s alarm goes off and he leans over, pressing a kiss to your temple, before getting up and taking a shower. Every so often, you’d join him in the shower, but not today. Today you get up and head to the kitchen.
You’d loved Spencer’s old apartment, but when the two of you moved in together, especially after the events of his last few somewhat traumatizing years with the BAU, a change felt necessary. The two bedroom, two bath bungalow you two found just outside of Stafford, Virginia was just as charming as Spencer’s old place. Antique, but modern enough to have better security than his old building (he is understandably a stickler for safety). The kitchen features windows looking out into your small backyard, Spencer planted a tree last year and you’re sure it was in order to watch the leaves change as fall arrives. The tips of the leaves are just beginning to yellow, the light rain a perfect background for the day you have planned. You turn on the stove and oven and open the fridge, pulling out a can of pumpkin spice cinnamon rolls and the package of turkey bacon. You begin cooking and you can hear your husband start getting ready and, just as you thought it would, the smell of the food draws him away from his typical morning routine (get dressed, make coffee, grab a granola bar if he remembers to) and brings him to the kitchen.
“Is there a reason,” he asks from the doorway, “that it smells…like, um-“
“Like fall?” you ask, smiling over your shoulder at him as you flip the turkey bacon in the pan. Spencer grins and you turn back to the food.
“Well, yeah,” Spencer says. “You planning a fun day alone?”
You wince a little at the small hint of jealousy you hear in his voice, thrilled that your response is, “No, not alone.”
“Oh,” he replies, a little shocked. “Is someone coming ov-“
“Nope,” you reply cheerfully, grabbing a mitt and pulling the cinnamon rolls out of the oven.
“Wait…wait, what?” Spencer questions, totally not distracted by you bending over like that.
“Come on, lovey,” you tease, turning to face him fully. “Put the pieces together.”
He stares at you for a moment and then looks almost overwhelmingly sad, “Honey, I have three classes today, I can’t-“
“About that,” you cut him off quietly. He arches a brow at you, but you cross to the end of the kitchen island, pulling out Spencer’s university laptop and opening it, clicking to his classes’ dashboard page on the school’s site and turning it around slowly, chewing on your lip just a little nervously.
“Dear Students,” Spencer reads after popping on his glasses. “Classes are cancelled until Monday due to slight illness on my part. Have a great long weekend - be sure to read ahead for Monday!”
There’s a slightly too long silence that makes you just a bit nervous.
“I know it might be a bit of an overstep, but you’ve just seemed so…so burned out lately and-“ you’re cut off as Spencer moves to stand right in front of you.
“You cancelled my classes for me?” he asks, a small smile poking at the corner of his mouth.
“Yes,” you reply.
“So that we could…do what, exactly?” He attempts to keep his smile at bay, but is nearly beaming.
“Well,” you smile, “I thought we could eat some pumpkin spice cinnamon rolls and bacon and, I don’t know, maybe get really cozy on our super comfortable couch and watch Hocus Pocus, Corpse Bride, and Practical Magic? Maybe throw in Crimson Peak if we’re still going strong?”
“Just to clarify, you realized I was burned out and decided to plan a cozy fall movie day to make me feel better?” Spencer asks, almost incredulous, wrapping his arms around your waist.
“That would be it, yes,” you nod, wrapping your arms around his neck.
“Damn,” he mutters quietly, looking down at you.
“What?” you giggle.
“Nothing,” Spencer beams, turning his head and eyeing your lips, “I just definitely married the perfect woman.”
Your laugh is quickly quashed by his lips on yours.
~ I remember Halloween. ~
Tag List: @shadyladyperfection @cielo1984 @rainsong01 @pessimystic-fangirl @saspencereid @andreasworlsboring101 @avidreider  @aizawaxkun @babyspencersslut @no-honey-no  @subhuman-queer  @uhuhuh @whatamidoinghp @spongeshxt  @itsametaphorbriansblog @vgirl-10123  @stand-tall-pineapple  @padsfirewhisky @ceeellewrites @dahliasbouqet @drayshadow @cal-ifornication-blog @theetherealbloom  @eevee0722 @questionmymentality @wintermuteway @ellesmythe @ssa-githae @cherrystay @calm-and-doctor @devilswaldorf @half-blood-dork @blameitonthenight21 @happyreid187 @goldeng1rl8 @meangirlsx @honestlystop @avengers-ass-emble17 @bauhousewife @averyhotchner @underscorecourt  @fan-girl-97 @coolbeans3 @boxofsparklingmuses @allaboutsml @percabethfangirl @buckyluvbot @v-is-obsessive @tanyaherondale @usuck @mitchiri-nek0  @kaitlynpcallmebeepme @miraclesoflove @meganskane @babymetaldoll @ivebeenthinkingboutu @rockin2thebeats @infinite-tides @onlyhereforthefanfics  @g-l-pierce @thisiscalm-andits-doctor @art-and-thoughts @exhaleli @allthecolorsneverseen @measure-in-pain @acidicbloody @hotchnerxo @her-storybooks  @skyewardolicitycloisdelena91 @bilesxbilinskixlahey @wilbur-rabbit @twilightlover2007 @ssamorganhotchner @h0tch-r0cket @wheelsupkels @jhiddles03 @lovesammikinzz @m-mhotchner @chaoticconnoisseurgiver @baueoud @mischiefmanaged71 @gspenc @spottedzebrasinpartyhats @her-storybooks @kajjaka @chickensrule  @marvel-mars @wanniiieeee @gublur @aivilovio @rousethemouse​ @unionjackpillow​
298 notes · View notes
reidscanehand · 8 months
Note
Your blog is not showing up in the searchbar :l I don't know if it's because you change your visibility settings or something else but :((
hey! it should be fixed now!
1 note · View note
reidscanehand · 9 months
Text
Just to add to the last few posts.
PLEASE DO NOT PUT MY FICS INTO AI. PLEASE DO NOT STEAL THEM. PLEASE DO NOT REPOST.
I try really, really hard with my writing. I love doing it. I love doing it for myself and I love sharing it with you guys. I put a lot of effort into everything I post, including graphics and playlists. Please don’t take that away from me by comparing what I do to what a robot can pump out ten seconds.
Please encourage writers in the most uplifting way you can. Please reblog, please comment, please share your thoughts and feelings with us. Tell us what you like, what you hope for. Share your excitement for the fandom, for the fics, for our work, for our plot lines and ideas. We’ll share it back.
Writers, content creators, we work so hard for free and compared to how tumblr was years ago, we receive very little in return. Add a sideblog, share your favourite stories, write a little review, send your favourite writer some feedback and some love. It’s free - just like our stories.
Please don’t let AI and the assumption that tumblr has an algorithm that works like tiktok ruin content creators love for sharing their work.
1K notes · View notes
reidscanehand · 10 months
Text
not to get too personal (lol):
you know when you’re lowkey type a but your imposter syndrome is so bad that you think you’re doing badly at being type a sending you into an intense spiral of existential dread?
5 notes · View notes
reidscanehand · 11 months
Text
This is so fucking sweet and I’ve reread it like ten times because I am *not doing well*.
I’m so happy that this is something you love and honored to have written something people continue to read and care about.
Thank you, lovely xx
The One Where Everyone Finds Out (Full)
Full Fic in Chronological Order of The One Where Everyone Finds Out
Spencer Reid x BAUfem! Reader
Background Canon: Penelope Garcia x Derek Morgan
Category: Very, very fluffy. 
Key: ~~~ = time shift within narrative; ++++++++= character perspective shift
TW: mentions of Maeve’s death, cursing, mentions of drug addiction and craving 
After finally finishing this series, I got another question about the timeline and I directed them to the chronological order I’d published. They said that they wanted to reread it in order and…I went a little stir-crazy and took all the existing material and put it in chronological order. So, here it is, the 47 page, nearly 22,000 word story if you’d like to read it like this. Thank you for the love, can you not tell how much I miss this already? xx
Tumblr media
Keep reading
2K notes · View notes
reidscanehand · 1 year
Text
you’re the northern star
Inspired by this song by Dom Fera Pairing: Rockstar!Remus Lupin x fem!Reader (Modern AU) Category: Hurt/Comfort/Fluff TW: implied alcohol/drug use (really just overdoing it on Remus’ part)
Well, this is different, innit? I was rewatching the Taylor Swift Miss Americana documentary and I got an idea about a rockstar not sure of what to do with himself. Also, this is a really fucking stunning song that I’ve loved and wanted to use for a while. The other lyrics Y/N sings are another Dom Fera song called “Midnights in October”. 
Tumblr media
Three rum and cokes and a couple beers in Some lucky drunk stood up, heavy with where he’d been And he held onto someone, and he sung out compelled “You’re why I was right to trust myself”
~~~
Being a rockstar was everything Remus ever dreamed of. The Marauders had kicked off when the boys had all finished school together. Peter had quickly left before they really took off  - unsurprising, really, but no less saddening - quickly replaced, though, by Frank Longbottom, who was, in fact, a better player anyway. With Frank on keyboards, Remus on bass, James on drums, and Sirius on guitar and vocals, the band really began to gel for the first time. Remus and Sirius wrote all the music and lyrics - mostly Remus, really. He could play piano, guitar, and bass, making it easier for him to arrange everything, but Sirius did his fair share. The addition of Frank seemed to symbolize a new beginning for everything, really. 
That and James and Lily finally getting together. If James wasn’t so head over heels for the girl, Remus could’ve sworn he’d asked her out just for her connections. 
With Lily installed as their manager, The Marauders started to play bigger venues, their songs started getting more streams, and, suddenly, they were releasing EPs, then an album released to stunning reviews and an enthusiastic and ever growing fan base. They were invited on Graham Norton, then played a UK tour, then a US tour, performing on Jimmy Fallon, and Saturday Night Live. Then the Grammys came - Album of the Year, Record of the Year, Best New Artist, and Best Rock Album, all in one fell swoop. 
And Remus suddenly realized that that was all he’d ever wanted. All he’d ever wanted...and now that he had it, what was he to do? He didn’t really know. He suddenly felt embarrassed and uncomfortable. He couldn’t write, he couldn’t sleep, he couldn’t do much of anything. He played with the group, but even Sirius got on him for how bummed out he sounded while singing backing vocals. He didn’t feel like he could talk to his bandmates. He started drinking...aggressively, really. When he couldn’t sleep, he would drink to knock himself out, sometimes popping pills to help in the endeavor. Then he’d take pills to wake up, take pills to energize himself to do a show. He knew it was bad, but he felt just numb. 
It was an unspoken problem with his bandmates. They knew something was wrong, especially Sirius, who was so furious with him after their last writing session - a session to which Remus arrived late and hungover - that he didn’t speak to him for almost a week unless he absolutely had to. This last leg of the US tour couldn’t be over quick enough in Remus’ opinion. Tensions were high and maybe...maybe he just needed a break? He wasn’t sure. Their Reno, Nevada shows had been sold out and with the weekend over, they’d leave the next morning for Los Angeles. Dropping his stuff at the bus and then going to his hotel room to pick up his wallet, he left the hotel without telling anyone, doubting they’d miss him. James and Lily were...canoodling in their room, Frank was facetiming back home with his girlfriend, Alice, and Sirius was seducing whatever groupie he’d brought back that evening. Remus had tried the groupie route, hoping that feeling something would bring him back to earth, but it just made him feel even more numb, really. 
So, he took off. Their hotel was near enough to a bar that he walked over pretty quickly. It was some local place, he didn’t pay the name too much mind, settling at the bar and hoping no one recognized him. It was pretty dark, anyway. There was a little group playing popular music covers on a small stage in one corner, but it wasn’t too busy. Remus asked for a rum and coke, heavy on the rum. The bartender seemed to get the message and Remus quickly chugged back a couple of drinks, asking for a third when the band caught his attention.
“This is a less popular song,” a young woman says while pulling a stool up to the mic, “but it’s one of my favorites. I hope you like it.” The opening chords of the song caught his attention. He watched, transfixed, as the young woman began to sing.
“Oh, oh, oh, oh. There’s a story I tell, really just to myself. Like a prayer I sing to empty shores, so how’s it sound just like yours? How’s it sound just like yours?” she sang wistfully, her pretty voice lilting around the lyrics. 
Remus hoped he wasn’t drunkenly imagining things...because he’d written this song. It was one of the first songs released by The Marauders back before...before anything, really. Before they’d turned to rock, even. It was one of the songs he’d recorded with Sirius when it was just the two of them. He’d recorded all the parts in his closet at university, sitting cross-legged on the floor to fit in there with his various instruments, and mixing the parts on his computer instead of writing a paper for his intro to philosophy course. 
“There’s a spirit over midnights in October and it sings to you and only you. So, how did I hear it too? How did I hear it too?” She continues to play on ukelele as the rest of the band comes in on piano, bass, and drum, but Remus remains focused on the young woman. Her eyes are closed, but she’s smiling to herself as she sings. She looks so...peaceful. He can’t believe it’s his song that’s made her so...so happy, so wistful. The fans loved the music, sure, but Remus hadn’t seen someone love someting he’d created like this before. He sips his drink slowly, methodically. He doesn’t want to get drunk for the first time in ages. He wants to speak to this beautiful girl. He wants to tell her...he doesn’t know, but he needs to be more put together to talk to her. 
“And if we try to say what we need we could be okay. We clearly believe in believing, baby, we’ll try slow, we’ll try slow. There’s a spirit over midnights in October and it sings to you, only you and now I’m singing too. And now I’m singing too. And now I’m singing too.” She finishes the song and there’s a small round of applause, led mostly by Remus. The guitarist steps up to the mic and thanks everyone, announcing the end of the set for the band. The group gets offstage and Remus tries not to seem creepy as the young woman crosses to bar, leaning over it and ordering a Jameson on the rocks. 
“I’ll get it,” he hears himself say. She turns to see him and her eyes widen. 
“Oh my God, you’re...you’re Remus Lupin,” she almost whispers.
“Yeah,” he shrugs unsure of what to say. He’s still not used to the fans. Thankfully, she doesn’t seem the type to freak out. In fact she looks almost embarrassed.
“I promise I had no idea you were here,” she says quietly, “I would never have played that if I’d known-”
“I loved it,” he cuts her off. “You have a beautiful voice.”
“Um,” she looks surprised, “thank you. I really...um, I’m not really a singer or-”
“Could’ve fooled me,” he teases. The bartender hands her her drinks and she seems to remember where they are. 
“What’s your name?” he asks. 
“Y/N,” she answers shyly. She looks down at her drink and opens her mouth, quickly closing it again, unsure of what to say. Remus feels the most sober he’s felt in ages. There’s something about this girl that’s warming him. He can feel his heart beating and it’s the most he’s felt in ages. 
“Well, Y/N,” he smiles, scooting over and sitting next to her. “Tell me more about yourself.”
“I...what?” Y/N looks at him quizzically. “Don’t you have a show or...groupies to...or something?”
“I don’t have anything to do,” he teases, “except talk to the pretty lady that sang one of my oldest and most favorite songs in a random bar in Reno. So how’s about you tell me everything about yourself, hm?”
She looks at him, head tilting slightly, “Can I get you a drink?”
“A water,” he answers quietly. Her eyes glance for the briefest second at the three empty glasses next to him, but she doesn’t ask any questions. She orders him a water and scoots closer. 
“So, my name is Y/N Y/L/N.”
~~~
He said Keep me up, keep me out late Keep me close, I need your faith Keep right where you are ‘Cause I followed this far Like I’m sure that you’re the Northern Star I’m sure that you’re the Northern Star
~~~
“I need a ticket for tomorrow’s show, please,” Remus asks suddenly, not quite expecting the silence that follows. He looks up and sees everyone on the bus staring at him. “What?”
“For tomorrow?” Lily questions, clearly trying not to sound surprised.
“Yes, please,” Remus replies. 
“Who the hell do you know in LA?” Sirius asks far more aggressively than Lily.
“She’s not from LA,” Remus answers. “But she couldn’t get a ticket to the Reno shows, so I invited her to the LA one.”
“So there’s a she?” James teases, wiggling his eyebrows. Lily elbows him gently and then pulls her iPad over to her from the box it rests in on the bus. She opens it and clicks a few things. 
“VIP, I’d imagine?” she asks without looking at him.
“If you can, that’d be cool,” Remus tries to sound nonchalant. Lily nods and continues typing. 
“And what’s the name of this she?” Frank heckles, glancing at Sirius and James.
“None of your business,” Remus replies, trying to hide his smile.
“I will actually need her name,” Lily corrects.
“You can’t just put it under my name?” Remus almost whines.
“Not if you want her in the VIP area,” Lily looks at him mock accusingly. “And from the sounds of things, I assume you do.”
“Y/N,” he tells her, sighing exasperatedly. “Y/N Y/L/N.” He looks back down at his notebook, scrawling down a few ideas he’d had in his head since last night. He and Y/N had talked until the bar closed, then sat outside talking about everything and nothing until he’d had to leave for the bus. The couch shifts as Sirius plops down next to him.
“You writing?” he asks, trying to sound nonchalant.
“Maybe,” Remus shrugs, not looking at him. He can feel Sirius staring at him, but sees him nod out of the corner of his eye.
“You hungover?” Sirius asks quietly. 
“No,” Remus clears his throat, finally looking up at his friend. “I’m, um...thinking of taking a break from drinking for a bit, actually.”
“Cool,” Sirius nods, a small smile playing on his lips. “Pills, too?” Remus nods and Sirius practically beams, clapping him on the shoulder and nodding. He stands, heading back to his bunk before turning around, now facing everyone, a shit-eating grin on his face, “So, will you be dedicating every song to Y/N, or...”
Remus throws a pillow at him and pretends to be annoyed, but can’t ignore the genuine joy edging its way back into his numbed heart.
~~~
Three hours in to a three minute call Some gambler wondered if she’d just won it all And she laughed when he asked if his head seemed alright Singing, “I’ve seen the bright side my whole lovely life”
~~~
“How’s the writing going?” she asks, taking a sip of water from her Stanley cup that’s just off camera. Remus leans back against his headboard and groans in response. He’s thrilled when she giggles and he looks back at the screen to catch her smile. 
“It can’t be that bad,” Y/N teases.
“It’s not, actually,” Remus replies. “Album’s due to the label in about two months and we’ve finalized all but two songs in terms of lyrics. So that’s two left to record? Not too shabby since it took us so long to write the damn thing.”
“That’s amazing. More songs about...oh, what’s that new one I loved? Um...the one about Aperol?”
“’Spritz’ was more Sirius’ baby than mine, I’ll have you know,” Remus explains, “but I’ll tell him you like it, he’ll rub that in my face for ages.”
“Maybe he’ll hate me less for distracting his bassist,” she quips. 
“No one hates you, darling,” Remus assures her. “If anything they’re just happy I’m smiling again.” It’s getting dark outside his window and he leans over to turn his lamp on. 
“I’m sorry,” Y/N says suddenly. “I shouldn’t be keeping you up. I know the time difference is-”
“Hey, hey, hey,” he cuts her off, sitting up straighter, “I wouldn’t answer if I didn’t want to talk, love.”
“I know, but we were just going to say goodnight and then-”
“We both know,” he tilts his head teasingly, staring at her through the webcam, “that we weren’t going to just say goodnight.” 
Y/N rolls her eyes but smiles, “There are better ways of telling me I talk too much.”
“I’d love it if you could talk to me all day long,” Remus assures her. “And you know that.”
“I’d like that, too,” Y/N whispers, smiling gently at him through the webcam. 
“Really?” Remus asks, sitting up slightly. 
“Yeah, there’s all this stuff that I want to tell you throughout the day...and I’d text you, but then I feel dumb for texting you-”
“You can text me whenever, you know that,” he reminds her. She giggles and his heart soars. 
“I’ll keep that in mind when you finally get annoyed of me sending you pictures of my morning smoothies,” she teases. 
“Smoothie time? Babe, I’d be heartbroken if I missed it!” She laughs and he uses the warm feeling in his chest to talk about what he’s wanted to for a few weeks now. “But...but what if...what if you were able to talk to me all day?”
She freezes, eyes growing wide, “What do you mean?”
“I know that we...I know we haven’t been together all that long,” he begins. “But, I would...I’d really like it if you’d be my girlfriend. And I’d...I’d love it if you’d come here and just be with me. You can still pursue your music here...I know that you’re...”
“I’d do it,” Y/N replies quietly. 
Remus’ heart does that thing that it’s done since the moment he saw her. It feels like it’s expanding in his chest. 
“Really?” 
“How soon do you want me there, lover boy?”
~~~
Three weeks away from a year since the score And the reckless thieves reckoned they could get even more They ain’t casing out weddings, nah those are too big a sight They’re just looking at dresses and rings that she likes
~~~
It’s warm in the Ed Sullivan Theatre, but Stephen Colbert is easily the nicest host Remus has ever had the pleasure to meet. Despite the fact that he agreed to letting them present the new song instead of playing the lead single, Remus is still nervous. 
“Three more weeks, dude,” Sirius whispers to him. 
“Yeah, I know. How’s James holding up? Ready to get married?” Remus jokes, leaning back so James can hear him, whispering even though they’re on a commercial break. 
James isn’t annoyed, though, he grins hugely, “Never been more ready, boys.”
“No, not that, I mean, yeah, but, you and your girl,” Sirius corrects. “One year, right?”
Remus beams himself, “Yeah, just about three weeks. Our anniversary’s, like, two days after the wedding.”
“You, um...you thinking about it?” Sirius hedges, passing side glances with Frank and James. 
“About what?” Remus asks with faux innocence. 
“Come off it,” Frank groans, rolling his eyes. He and Alice got married during their last break, just before the release of this new album, timing it perfectly before the madness kicked back up again. 
“You guys gonna be copying everything from me and Lily’s wedding?” James teases. The boys laugh, but Remus just smiles. He glances around and spots you talking to Lily, probably going over your set list. You’ll be opening for The Marauders in most cities during this next tour. You’re a bit more indie pop than The Marauders, but the boys genuinely wouldn’t have it any other way. And the fans will likely love how you close with one of Sirius’ and Remus’ oldest songs, bringing the boys onstage with a tune of their own. 
Seeing that you’re distracted, he turns back to his band, his oldest friends and whispers conspiratorially, “No...no, but, um...I mean, I’ve had the ring for about six months now.” 
All three men turn and face him, eyes widening, jaws dropping.
“Dude-”
“WHAT DO YOU MEAN?”
“Six months?!?!?”
“Chill,” Remus whisper yells. “I’m gonna ask when we go to Paris after the tour’s over.” 
“That’s so romantic!” Frank whispers, turning away as a cameraman signals for them. James smiles and sends him a thumbs up.
Sirius stares at him for a moment longer and smiles. He mouthes, “Happy for you, dude” as Colbert introduces them.
“Back stateside for their new tour, the British rock band The Marauders is with us tonight. Originally they were going to perform the newest lead single from their new album, which Rolling Stone has called, ‘a near perfect sophomore album’, but their bassist, Mr. Remus Lupin, emailed about a week ago and asked if he could perform a bonus track. This is a bit different, isn’t it, Remus?”
Mr. Colbert looks to the band and a camera zeroes in on Remus, a kind PA holding a mic up to him. 
“Yeah, it’s not...not really a rock song, I guess,” he grins as the audience titters. 
“It’s called ‘Northern Star’,” Colbert says, smiling widely at him.
“Yeah, yeah,” Remus nods. 
“When we started writing, Sirius and I, we had a lot of songs that sounded like this. And it took someone very special,” Remus finds Y/N’s eyes and his smile deepens, “to remind me how wonderful it felt to write like this again.”
“Well, please take it away,” Colbert finishes. 
Remus nods and looks down at the piano, pulling the attached mic closer to his face as silence falls over the audience. He can feel Y/N staring at him, not expecting this at all. 
“Three rum and cokes and a couple beers in Some lucky drunk stood up, heavy with where he'd been And he held onto someone, and he sung out, compelled ‘You're why I was right to trust myself’
He said Keep me up, keep me out late Keep me close, I need your faith Keep right where you are Cause I followed this far Like I'm sure that you're the Northern Star I’m sure that you’re the Northern Star
Three hours into a three-minute call Some gambler wondered if she'd just won it all And she laughed when he asked if his head seemed alright Singing, "I've seen the bright sides my whole lovely life"
She said Talk me up and talk me down Talk too long, I'll stick around Talk me into following you somewhere far Like I'm sure you're the Northern Star I'm sure you're the Northern Star
La la la
Three weeks away from a year since the score And the reckless thieves reckoned they could get even more They ain't casing out weddings, nah those are too big a sight They're just looking at dresses and rings that she likes
They said Keep me up, keep me out late Keep me close, I need your faith Keep right where you are Cause I followed this far Like I'm sure that you're the Northern Star Oh, I'm sure you're the Northern Star I'm sure And I'm sure that you're the Northern Star.”
Remus hits the last chords staring at Y/N, hearing his friends playing his beautiful song all around him, and knowing that he’s happier than he ever thought he could be. Rockstar be damned, this is what he’d always wanted. 
~~~
A/N: This is different, but I hope you liked it! 
Didn’t include my taglist because it’s been so long, plus this is a different fandom! Love you all xx 
98 notes · View notes