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“how dare you say we piss on the poor” is perhaps THEE best piece of vernacular to come out of tumblr dot com in the past decade. along with “what were you doing at the devils sacrament” (cheeky. inspired. relevant in every context) and “harold, they're lesbians” (timeless. funny as hell. gay)

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#sebastian malheur my darling #the day i read the countess conspiracy really and truly rewired my brain

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really? another album? didn't she just make one??

#wish she would stop releasing so much damn mediocre music so i could unblock my own first name everywhere

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[descends from my observatory] "Now dawns the age of the fat slut"

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really wish gender was more of a hobby and less of a societal contract and mandate

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It's April 19, 2024:

George Gordon Byron, 6th Baron Byron, has been dead for 200 slutty, slutty years.

#the romantics and their wacky antics

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one of the most infuriating things about becoming an adult is when you realize that it actually is 10x easier to solve problems by making a phone call vs literally any other communication method

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The new, updated version of my Dream Library print is available here with 3 background colour options!

Which would you most want? I would personally love to read the potentially award winning book that I occasionally have vague ideas about writing..

Instagram / Shop

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The best quality a fictional man can have is being deeply, pathetically, wretchedly in love with someone, I think

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Getting effusive compliments from higher ups at my job because my work is generally accurate when I submit it and. I uh. I guess I didn't realize that wasn't the bare minimum?

#its like. yeah. i mean. i do try to be accurate on the work that i am paid to do??? #didnt realize that was going above and beyond #like. i mean. when im at work. i just do my work. and i try to do it right the first time so i dont have to redo it #i truly thought that was what everyone else was doing too but it appears not

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Horniness is not intrinsically less pure than any other human motivation

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I noticed you haven’t been online in 10 hours, is therapy finally working?

this websites hate mail game is ruthless

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i love how cats use their little walnut brains to go, "hm. it appears mother is moving very quickly and carrying many things. i bet it would be very helpful if i got right in front of her feet. this will make everything work more smoothly and won't lead to mother almost launching herself down the stairs to avoid kicking me. i am so good at plans."

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i love how cats use their little walnut brains to go, "hm. it appears mother is moving very quickly and carrying many things. i bet it would be very helpful if i got right in front of her feet. this will make everything work more smoothly and won't lead to mother almost launching herself down the stairs to avoid kicking me. i am so good at plans."

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are you ok with people saying smash to your pics

go right ahead i think it’s fun

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I realise a lot of girl’s Gay Awakenings was kiera knightly or kristen stewart which is cool phenomena tbh but I’m rlly interested in other Gay Awakenings like for example mine was morena baccarin in firefly and also gemma artenton in st trinians. CALLING ALL GAYS (boys and nb babes included)!! reblog with ur non kiera/k-stew Gay Awakening!!!

#realized there was something not quite normal about me when i was 10 and had such a crush on anne hathaway and chris pine #in the princess diaries 2. and then i just shoved that down for many years #feel very left out sometimes because i dont get the kstew thing and i actively avoid watching kiera movies #also had a MASSIVE preteen crush on both wendy and pan in the 2003 peter pan which is adorable in hindsight

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do you ever laugh with your friends and think oh this is the point. this is the point of everything