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rogue-durin-16 · 2 months
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We really are on our way to 9 months officially dating?????
In my cynical fuckgirl era because when Lana Del Rey said it's not about having someone to love me anymore and when Taylor Swift said she would've made such a lovely bride what a shame she's fucked in the head and when Lovelytheband said maybe I'm just too good maybe I'll run away and when Kate Bush said the hounds of love are hunting I've always been a coward-
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rogue-durin-16 · 11 months
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I know we live in a simulation bc bitch you can't make this shit up. Today while I waited for the bus that takes me home, I saw a foreign girl standing before me reading one of MY EDDIE MUNSON FANFICS???? and then she?? panicked??? when she saw me staring???
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rogue-durin-16 · 11 months
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your BoB masterlist link is broken (on mobile) :<
Try now honey, idk what was happening but all my links crashed
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rogue-durin-16 · 1 year
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This era lasted a total of 20 days. 20 days of nonstop dating. And then I accidentally found this random girl that turned me fucking soft?
In my cynical fuckgirl era because when Lana Del Rey said it's not about having someone to love me anymore and when Taylor Swift said she would've made such a lovely bride what a shame she's fucked in the head and when Lovelytheband said maybe I'm just too good maybe I'll run away and when Kate Bush said the hounds of love are hunting I've always been a coward-
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rogue-durin-16 · 1 year
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How i felt towards you while I read this matchup:
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Hiii, first of all, I love you blog and the whole vibe. You're probably the first blog I've seen with the combination of kpop and band of brothers, cool combo.
I would like to request a band of brothers ship :))) My pronouns are he/him, I'm pretty short. I play the guitar and love drawing, photography... just anything artistic. I'm always optimistic and am very social. I love giving gifts whether its art or self baked food or random rocks... fun fact, I'm Belgian and I've been to bastogne a whole lot of times growing up,hope that enough information ;)
Also, I think you would really like @rogue-barnes-durin-main they're lovely and your blogs are somewhat alike ;)
Have a great day!
Yes hii thank you so much for your request and i’m so glad you like my blog! 💖
I ship you with…
David Webster!
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Song recommendation: Cruel Summer - Taylor Swift
- OMG what an iconic couple
- Okay so I think you guys would meet in a public library or something like that, both of you are so artistic and smart (in your own respective ways ofc) but he’d be trying to find a seat in there, and that’s when he sees you
- You looked so handsome but angelic at the same time, it almost took him of guard for a second because he wasn’t expecting someone so pretty to be in a library on the weekend.
- You would be so focused, on whatever you were doing, and he would be nervous to come and sit by you because he wouldn’t want to disturb you
- And you obviously catch on to his extreme staring at you, when you look up from your work and give him a sweet smile
- He almost passes out in that moment, you just smiled at him? Btw your gorg smile literally has his face in a deep shade of red
- He has to go over to you now, when he finally does, he can finally see how nice you look in the window sunlight, he can also see what you’re working on, it’s a drawing, and that’s when he’s like wait, that’s actually like so good??
- “That’s a real pretty drawing you got there, by the way, what’s your name?” AHHHH that’s exactly how he says it
- And of course you guys start talking together, immediately hitting it off, talking about all kinds of stuff, like what you usually draw, and his writings, the best books to read all of it, even to where the librarian has to tell you guys to leave because you guys are way too loud for a library
- he would find you extremely fascinating, you guys would go to a cafe afterwards because he just wants to get to know more and more of you atp, and the rest is history.
- He loves and admires your positive attitude so much, it really uplifts him in days where he feels like absolute shit, on his bad days, you can always bring a smile to his face with your encouraging personality
- You’re more of the social one in the relationship, but overall both of you are pretty outgoing when it comes to hanging out with friends, y’all are always talking to others and making friends with people, I think you guys would be a very charming couple in terms of talking and socializing, y’all are just so nice who wouldn’t wanna hang out with y’all?!
- Okay, when you bake him dessert as a gift for the first time, this man swears he fell in love, like actually swore up and down he was gonna marry you after he had a bite of the brownies you gifted him
- speaking of baking, I think you two would spend just one day where you guys bake up a whole bunch of cookies and such at it would be so fun and cute, he would be like such a romantic the whole time, putting cookie dough on his finger for you to eat, kissing your cheek and holding you while you prepare the baking pans and the dough, it would be so nice oh my gosh
- Or if you give him something that you drew or painted, his heart would literally melt, he knows how much thought and time you must’ve put in it and just that alone makes him fall in love with you all over again, he literally with thank you over and over again til you’re just like, “Dude, chill” LOL
- and in return of course he writes you a small poem that’s so romantic and sweet, it would literally bring you tears to your eyes, cause literally the thought of someone writing you a poem, confessing how much they’re in love with you is so adorable 😭
- He would find it SOO cool that you play guitar, like that’s just so neat to him and he would literally beg you to play something for him, he’s honestly such a fan girl for you when you play it and he just full on loves when you play the guitar, it also gives him hella butterflies
- omg omg omg, how could I forget your photography, he would jokingly always ask for you to take a pic of him while you guys were out together, and whenever you guys have a date outside or out in nature he would ask you to bring your camera stuff or whatever you use for photos,
- Like say you guys were on a picnic, he’d become the temporary photographer 🤣 he’d just be like, “babe look” and he would talk all kinds of photos, and even if they’re completely horrible you can’t tell him that because that would break his ego into pieces LMAO
- But I think you guys would go together sooo well, I can get like 100% that he would completely treat you like royalty and it would be so cute 😭 you never have to worry about anything ever when you’re with him
Thank you again so much for your request!! And i’m def going to check out @rogue-barnes-durin-main ‘s blog RNNNN 😋💛💛💛
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rogue-durin-16 · 1 year
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In my cynical fuckgirl era because when Lana Del Rey said it's not about having someone to love me anymore and when Taylor Swift said she would've made such a lovely bride what a shame she's fucked in the head and when Lovelytheband said maybe I'm just too good maybe I'll run away and when Kate Bush said the hounds of love are hunting I've always been a coward-
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rogue-durin-16 · 1 year
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Currently watching Outer Banks and idk what drug they put in JJ Maybank's character but jfc
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rogue-durin-16 · 1 year
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No you don't understand I got to hug her
I met my online bestie I'm-
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rogue-durin-16 · 1 year
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I met my online bestie I'm-
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rogue-durin-16 · 1 year
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Favorite tags
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This is a fun idea that I’ve had rolling in my head for a while, but you don’t have to do it if you don’t want to! What if the reader likes to draw, so obviously, when surrounded by those snackable men in East company, she draws them! She puts little notes next to the faces (ex. Thinks he’s gods gift to women, or sweetest man alive), and maybe how some of the Easy boys would react to flipping through the sketchbooks and seeing the notes? With Toye, Luz, Bull, and Shifty?
A/N: I drew them for no reason. In like half an hour. I am so stupid somebody sedate me. Btw I actually read this when you sent it and thought omg I love it, and then completely forgot it existed. Enjoy these super delayed headcanons? <3
Warnings: none
JOE TOYE
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"Hey, whatchu got there?"
Bad start.
You halfheartedly let him flip through the pages and this man's slack jawed.
Keep in mind that, while Joe knows you sketch in your free time, he has no idea you sketch them.
Double shock when he gets to his face.
Doesn't process the silly notes at first because something's not clicking.
You drew him. Him. Out of- him?
Tries his best not to blush
Genuinely doesn't know how to react
AND THEN HE SEES THE NOTES
This man cannot hold back a little smile of endearment when he reads 'toughest motherfucker' because that's a big ass compliment.
Specially considering he thinks he's a dud.
'an actual sweetheart' this man choked on his own words. A SWEETHEART. HIM. A-
"Do you... Like it or...?"
"It's— yeah no, I-I love it. They're really good huh..." Tries to act cool while he hands it back.
He can't look at you in the eye for a hot minute because you made his brain shortcircuit with a quick sketch.
Tough and a sweetheart. No one had ever called him a sweetheart.
Toye knows he's got a soft side to him, but it's buried so deep he never thought someone would notice.
Bot you did, and it keeps him up at night for months I'm not even kidding.
GEORGE LUZ
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George is bored. He's very vocal about it.
You don't care. You're very vocal about it too.
Well too bad because Luz wants attention so he's going to annoy you until he gets some.
Verbal vexation doesn't work because you're currently focused on sketching Malarkey, so he switches to plan B; snatching the sketchbook away from you.
Immediately teases you about drawing Don while you chase him through the house you're billeted in.
Flips through the pages without actually seeing shit because initially he just wanted your attention and he got it.
But then he catches a glimpse of his face and sudden he's actually interested.
A boyish grin lights up his gaze.
He's way too happy about a damn sketch and he knows it but he can't help it.
You drew him and he looks handsome. He has never thought of himself as handsome but apparently you did.
Shoves you away to read the notes.
'Easy's source of joy'. THE REASSURANCE HE FEELS-
He snickers at the 'human lucky charm.
Then his head snaps at you in disbelief.
"SHORT?!" He's FLABBERGASTED. It's your turn to laugh.
Also run because George is so chasing you.
He's not sure what he's gonna do when he gets you. Probably hit you with the goddamn sketchbook. Probably kiss you idk he'll see.
BULL RANDLEMAN
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Bull knows you sketch them for fun.
He's caught a glimpse of a couple of drawings here and there but never said anything, not even to you.
But now you two are sitting by each other's side at a bar in silence and he's adamant about making a conversation with you.
He bumps your arm, tilts his chin at you and then at the sketchbook peeping from your bag.
"Can I see 'em?"
How are you gonna say no to this absolute darling? To be fair you forgot about the little notes on his drawing.
He nonchalantly flips the pages, occasionally nodding and making quiet comments.
"You got talent, Y/n/n."
He's got the book wide open so you can see what he's seeing. And you see his drawing. And the notes.
Bull's heart swells at the sketch. It shouldn't surprise him— the fact that he's got his own page, but it does.
He reads the first note and the corner of his lip twists up. HE READS THE SECOND NOTE AND SNORTS.
He quirks a brow at you. "Anything you wanna tell me?"
You're mortified. He assures you he's completely kidding. Congratulates you on the drawings. Gives it back and watch your every move.
Husband material huh?
SHIFTY POWERS
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Shifty makes eye contact with you while you're sketching him. Thrice.
First time you give him a mortified smile and he doesn't get why, but he returns it.
Second time he knows something's up. He sees the sketchbook.
Third time he walks up to you.
You attempt to uhm pretty much run away because you just finished so there's no need to stick around anymore.
He cuts through and get to you before you can leave.
"What were you drawing?" He asks, but he means 'were you drawing me?'
You show him and his eyes light up with joy.
He struggles with words but his visage is a very telling sign that he actually loves it.
He goes through everybody's sketch and asks if you were gonna add any notes to his.
The fact that he seems so excited about it dims your embarrassment and gives you a little bit of courage.
So you take back the sketchbook and scribble the notes before giving it back.
HE LOOKS EVEN HAPPIER.
'certified guardian angel' HELL YES, HE'LL KEEP YOU SAFE ANY DAY.
'lovely but deadly' he wants to kiss you. Much like Toye, he's not used to people seeing both parts of him, but... You do?
"Could I... Maybe... Keep it?"
You're surprised no one else has asked for the drawing. Maybe they assumed you wouldn't give it away.
Shifty's eyes widen momentarily when you rip the page and hand it to him.
He'll cherish the sketch forever.
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Tags:
Band Of Brothers: @francois-ceverts @chubbypotatoepie @tvserie-s-world
Permanent taglist: @elia-the-bibliophile @randomparanoid @karlthecat15722 @thebutchersdaughtersblog @amourtentiaa @comfort-reads
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rogue-durin-16 · 1 year
Note
WAIT
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Oh MY GOD DID YOU GUYS MEET IRL
💚cast your mutuals as band of brothers characters💚
In no particular order:
@cielie-voss as Don Malarkey (the biggest Hufflepuff vibe. A dork. The trauma. Right up my alley. Deadpan funny. Functional despite everything (how?). Underestimated but could kill you and wouldn't get caught. Kinda reckless. The sweetest soul. Deserves better.)
@itswormtrain as Joe Liebgott (scrappy little bastard. Literally where were you raised (affectionate). Trouble but in an endearing way. Sardonically funny. A tease. Actually hot.)
@gaypiratesandangels as David Webster (I wanna wrap you up in a blanket and mother you. Introvert. Artsy. Film lover. Writer. Well-spoken. Versatile. Kinda 💅🏻.)
@lordndsaviorwinters as Alex Penkala (Token introvert in a trio of extroverts. Actually trouble but no one would believe me. A gentleman. Awkward. Unintentionally funny. Tied to the hip to the following mutual.)
@addiesfairytalebs as Skip Muck (you and Lana come in pack or what. Little shit but actually smooth. Will make everyone feel included. Prettiest smile. Tone the mischief down. Lucky af.)
@iambasilgnome as Joe Toye (Irish queen if I remember correctly. Witty. Cool but in a simple way. High-key badass. Gryffindor but softie.)
@liebgotts-lovergirl as Floyd Talbert (Super easy o talk to. Cheeky. Flirty. A true sweetheart. Loyal to a fault. Probably fit be put in charge but idk if you'd like it.)
@bandofbrothersandsisters as Eugene Roe (Caretaker. Goes unnoticed for absolutely no reason. Self-critical. Mom friend but also let me mother you. Little anxious queen. Cat person.)
@onlyyouexisthere as Richard Winters (glueing this fandom together everyday. Flawless content. Inspiring. Introvert. Idk if you know what's socializing (affectionate).)
@tvserie-s-world as C. Carwood Lipton (down-to-earth. Underrated af. Nourishing this fandom low-key silently. I feel like everyone of us appreciate you endlessly but don't say it a lot. Queen of encouragement.)
@rossmccallsqueen as Harry Welsh (funny. Kind of unhinged. Easy to talk to. Would hang out with you anytime. ENFP vibes even though you might not be.)
@victoryrollsandredlips as Lewis Nixon (so classy. Cultured. Good taste. Probably prone to addiction (yes, media consumption counts). You need to sleep. Very supportive.)
@wwhatev3r as Shifty Powers (Introvert. A joy to have around. Very polite. The few times we interacted I wanted to invite you into my home and give you hot chocolate and cookies. Giving old soul vibes.)
@nandoalonsos as Ronald Speirs (cryptic creature. I like you but you also throw me off. What's your real identity bc I feel like I'll never pin you down. Giving off a super cool vibe tho.)
@iwasathomeintonawanda as Donald Hoobler (sweet and simple in the best way. Giving a "I'm a little awkward irl" vibe. Legally I can and will adopt you. Probably hardworking but also messy. Has the best intentions.)
If we're indeed mutuals and I forgot about you let me know and I'll add you real quick<3.
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rogue-durin-16 · 1 year
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You're a Luger away from becoming Malark
💚cast your mutuals as band of brothers characters💚
In no particular order:
@cielie-voss as Don Malarkey (the biggest Hufflepuff vibe. A dork. The trauma. Right up my alley. Deadpan funny. Functional despite everything (how?). Underestimated but could kill you and wouldn't get caught. Kinda reckless. The sweetest soul. Deserves better.)
@itswormtrain as Joe Liebgott (scrappy little bastard. Literally where were you raised (affectionate). Trouble but in an endearing way. Sardonically funny. A tease. Actually hot.)
@gaypiratesandangels as David Webster (I wanna wrap you up in a blanket and mother you. Introvert. Artsy. Film lover. Writer. Well-spoken. Versatile. Kinda 💅🏻.)
@lordndsaviorwinters as Alex Penkala (Token introvert in a trio of extroverts. Actually trouble but no one would believe me. A gentleman. Awkward. Unintentionally funny. Tied to the hip to the following mutual.)
@addiesfairytalebs as Skip Muck (you and Lana come in pack or what. Little shit but actually smooth. Will make everyone feel included. Prettiest smile. Tone the mischief down. Lucky af.)
@iambasilgnome as Joe Toye (Irish queen if I remember correctly. Witty. Cool but in a simple way. High-key badass. Gryffindor but softie.)
@liebgotts-lovergirl as Floyd Talbert (Super easy o talk to. Cheeky. Flirty. A true sweetheart. Loyal to a fault. Probably fit be put in charge but idk if you'd like it.)
@bandofbrothersandsisters as Eugene Roe (Caretaker. Goes unnoticed for absolutely no reason. Self-critical. Mom friend but also let me mother you. Little anxious queen. Cat person.)
@onlyyouexisthere as Richard Winters (glueing this fandom together everyday. Flawless content. Inspiring. Introvert. Idk if you know what's socializing (affectionate).)
@tvserie-s-world as C. Carwood Lipton (down-to-earth. Underrated af. Nourishing this fandom low-key silently. I feel like everyone of us appreciate you endlessly but don't say it a lot. Queen of encouragement.)
@rossmccallsqueen as Harry Welsh (funny. Kind of unhinged. Easy to talk to. Would hang out with you anytime. ENFP vibes even though you might not be.)
@victoryrollsandredlips as Lewis Nixon (so classy. Cultured. Good taste. Probably prone to addiction (yes, media consumption counts). You need to sleep. Very supportive.)
@wwhatev3r as Shifty Powers (Introvert. A joy to have around. Very polite. The few times we interacted I wanted to invite you into my home and give you hot chocolate and cookies. Giving old soul vibes.)
@nandoalonsos as Ronald Speirs (cryptic creature. I like you but you also throw me off. What's your real identity bc I feel like I'll never pin you down. Giving off a super cool vibe tho.)
@iwasathomeintonawanda as Donald Hoobler (sweet and simple in the best way. Giving a "I'm a little awkward irl" vibe. Legally I can and will adopt you. Probably hardworking but also messy. Has the best intentions.)
If we're indeed mutuals and I forgot about you let me know and I'll add you real quick<3.
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rogue-durin-16 · 1 year
Note
Get yourself some brass knuckles queen
💚cast your mutuals as band of brothers characters💚
In no particular order:
@cielie-voss as Don Malarkey (the biggest Hufflepuff vibe. A dork. The trauma. Right up my alley. Deadpan funny. Functional despite everything (how?). Underestimated but could kill you and wouldn't get caught. Kinda reckless. The sweetest soul. Deserves better.)
@itswormtrain as Joe Liebgott (scrappy little bastard. Literally where were you raised (affectionate). Trouble but in an endearing way. Sardonically funny. A tease. Actually hot.)
@gaypiratesandangels as David Webster (I wanna wrap you up in a blanket and mother you. Introvert. Artsy. Film lover. Writer. Well-spoken. Versatile. Kinda 💅🏻.)
@lordndsaviorwinters as Alex Penkala (Token introvert in a trio of extroverts. Actually trouble but no one would believe me. A gentleman. Awkward. Unintentionally funny. Tied to the hip to the following mutual.)
@addiesfairytalebs as Skip Muck (you and Lana come in pack or what. Little shit but actually smooth. Will make everyone feel included. Prettiest smile. Tone the mischief down. Lucky af.)
@iambasilgnome as Joe Toye (Irish queen if I remember correctly. Witty. Cool but in a simple way. High-key badass. Gryffindor but softie.)
@liebgotts-lovergirl as Floyd Talbert (Super easy o talk to. Cheeky. Flirty. A true sweetheart. Loyal to a fault. Probably fit be put in charge but idk if you'd like it.)
@bandofbrothersandsisters as Eugene Roe (Caretaker. Goes unnoticed for absolutely no reason. Self-critical. Mom friend but also let me mother you. Little anxious queen. Cat person.)
@onlyyouexisthere as Richard Winters (glueing this fandom together everyday. Flawless content. Inspiring. Introvert. Idk if you know what's socializing (affectionate).)
@tvserie-s-world as C. Carwood Lipton (down-to-earth. Underrated af. Nourishing this fandom low-key silently. I feel like everyone of us appreciate you endlessly but don't say it a lot. Queen of encouragement.)
@rossmccallsqueen as Harry Welsh (funny. Kind of unhinged. Easy to talk to. Would hang out with you anytime. ENFP vibes even though you might not be.)
@victoryrollsandredlips as Lewis Nixon (so classy. Cultured. Good taste. Probably prone to addiction (yes, media consumption counts). You need to sleep. Very supportive.)
@wwhatev3r as Shifty Powers (Introvert. A joy to have around. Very polite. The few times we interacted I wanted to invite you into my home and give you hot chocolate and cookies. Giving old soul vibes.)
@nandoalonsos as Ronald Speirs (cryptic creature. I like you but you also throw me off. What's your real identity bc I feel like I'll never pin you down. Giving off a super cool vibe tho.)
@iwasathomeintonawanda as Donald Hoobler (sweet and simple in the best way. Giving a "I'm a little awkward irl" vibe. Legally I can and will adopt you. Probably hardworking but also messy. Has the best intentions.)
If we're indeed mutuals and I forgot about you let me know and I'll add you real quick<3.
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rogue-durin-16 · 1 year
Note
💚cast your mutuals as band of brothers characters💚
In no particular order:
@cielie-voss as Don Malarkey (the biggest Hufflepuff vibe. A dork. The trauma. Right up my alley. Deadpan funny. Functional despite everything (how?). Underestimated but could kill you and wouldn't get caught. Kinda reckless. The sweetest soul. Deserves better.)
@itswormtrain as Joe Liebgott (scrappy little bastard. Literally where were you raised (affectionate). Trouble but in an endearing way. Sardonically funny. A tease. Actually hot.)
@gaypiratesandangels as David Webster (I wanna wrap you up in a blanket and mother you. Introvert. Artsy. Film lover. Writer. Well-spoken. Versatile. Kinda 💅🏻.)
@lordndsaviorwinters as Alex Penkala (Token introvert in a trio of extroverts. Actually trouble but no one would believe me. A gentleman. Awkward. Unintentionally funny. Tied to the hip to the following mutual.)
@addiesfairytalebs as Skip Muck (you and Lana come in pack or what. Little shit but actually smooth. Will make everyone feel included. Prettiest smile. Tone the mischief down. Lucky af.)
@iambasilgnome as Joe Toye (Irish queen if I remember correctly. Witty. Cool but in a simple way. High-key badass. Gryffindor but softie.)
@liebgotts-lovergirl as Floyd Talbert (Super easy o talk to. Cheeky. Flirty. A true sweetheart. Loyal to a fault. Probably fit be put in charge but idk if you'd like it.)
@bandofbrothersandsisters as Eugene Roe (Caretaker. Goes unnoticed for absolutely no reason. Self-critical. Mom friend but also let me mother you. Little anxious queen. Cat person.)
@onlyyouexisthere as Richard Winters (glueing this fandom together everyday. Flawless content. Inspiring. Introvert. Idk if you know what's socializing (affectionate).)
@tvserie-s-world as C. Carwood Lipton (down-to-earth. Underrated af. Nourishing this fandom low-key silently. I feel like everyone of us appreciate you endlessly but don't say it a lot. Queen of encouragement.)
@rossmccallsqueen as Harry Welsh (funny. Kind of unhinged. Easy to talk to. Would hang out with you anytime. ENFP vibes even though you might not be.)
@victoryrollsandredlips as Lewis Nixon (so classy. Cultured. Good taste. Probably prone to addiction (yes, media consumption counts). You need to sleep. Very supportive.)
@wwhatev3r as Shifty Powers (Introvert. A joy to have around. Very polite. The few times we interacted I wanted to invite you into my home and give you hot chocolate and cookies. Giving old soul vibes.)
@nandoalonsos as Ronald Speirs (cryptic creature. I like you but you also throw me off. What's your real identity bc I feel like I'll never pin you down. Giving off a super cool vibe tho.)
@iwasathomeintonawanda as Donald Hoobler (sweet and simple in the best way. Giving a "I'm a little awkward irl" vibe. Legally I can and will adopt you. Probably hardworking but also messy. Has the best intentions.)
If we're indeed mutuals and I forgot about you let me know and I'll add you real quick<3.
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rogue-durin-16 · 1 year
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Not me thinking I had like three BoB mutuals and that this would be easy
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rogue-durin-16 · 1 year
Text
THE MOMENT THEY KNEW
Summary: their imminent death brings surprising clarity to both Jyn and Cassian. While one of them surrenders to their bittersweet realization, the other decides to act on it.
Pairing: Jyn Erso x Cassian Andor
Genre: angst
Tags:
Rogue One/Andor: —
Permanent taglist: @elia-the-bibliophile @randomparanoid @karlthecat15722 @thebutchersdaughtersblog @amourtentiaa @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @comfort-reads
Warnings: broken bones, blaster wounds, major character death, canon compliant, language
A/N: Recently read the Rogue One novelisation in hopes of finding a little kiss in the elevator scene. I was so disappointed that I wrote it myself (I even made some silly little playlists). I was tempted to write a happy ending but I'll leave that for another fic. Enjoy <3
Rogue-durin-16 navigation
AO3 link
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Jyn Erso wasn't stupid. She knew they wouldn't make it.
A part of her was made aware of that the moment K2 had shut the vault's gate. Said part kept growing the higher she climbed.
By the time she, through welled up, defiant eyes, saw Cassian Andor holding up a smoky blaster even though he could barely hold himself up on his feet, she knew.
They wouldn't make it to the shuttle. They wouldn't make it out of Scarif.
It didn't matter much to her at first, though; more important thoughts flooded her mind. Thoughts about the Alliance's Intelligence Captain who she had just learned how to read.
She thought about him choosing to grant her cover over saving himself while they had attempted their climb up the data tower. She thought about him plummeting twelve stories down and crawling back up to help her atop the citadel.
She also thought about how he constantly refused to leave her behind, like everyone else had done before.
And she surprised herself being capable of thinking all of that at once throughout the short path she made over the ruined catwalk in order to reach him.
It all washed over her like a tidal wave, erasing the looming planet killer and the suicide mission and the man in white, and substituting it by how beautiful Cassian looked.
Jyn forced her mind to remember she still had a mission to accomplish. Instead of letting Cassian's name slip out of her lips while she threw herself at his arms in a kind of relief she had last felt when she was eight, the woman rushed to the tower's computer and sent the message to the rebel fleet.
At least, she hoped so.
With all buttons pressed and the plans being broadcasted, she still knew that was it, and it still mattered little to her because she wasn't alone. Cassian supported his own body against the concrete column, right by Jyn's side; his chest heaved as much as hers, and his arm pressed at his abdomen as if he was trying to mitigate the pain caused by the fall, but he was smiling.
Jyn hoped he was as happy to see her as she was to see him. She started to step closer to examine him —although she knew she'd be little help for the Captain—, when she heard it. Someone's staggered breath behind her.
The man in white.
The warm feeling coursing through her veins thanks to Cassian's proximity ran cold.
She ran cold, yet rage made her skin burn, because the man who killed her mother, the man who ruined her father, the man who had sentenced Cassian to death even if they were to make it back to the cargo ship, was still breathing on the floor.
Her father's revenge was sabotaging the Empire's deadliest weapon; hers would be smashing the Krennic's skull until his brains were poured out on the metallic platform.
Jyn seethed and leaped away from Cassian with a growl. She didn't want to kill Krennic, she wanted to murder him, she wanted to—
"Hey— Leave it, leave it!" Cassian urged as his free hand gripped her bicep, tugging her back and holding her flush against him for good measure.
A part of Jyn wanted to try again, but her rage was subsiding increasingly fast, and the scalding feeling on her skin toned down to a tummy-flipping tingle where Cassian's torso met her side.
"That's it." His voice became a soft, soothing whisper on her ear, and she couldn't help but lean on the wounded man.
He gladly took her in, his calloused digits exchanging her elbow for the small of her back and then her waist. Cassian stayed like that, slowly swaying them both while awaited —maybe a bit too long— for her need to disappear. He wondered whether Jyn's hand clinging on the back of his shirt felt as intimate to her as it did to him.
"Let's go." He finally spoke, bumping his nose on the woman's temple —or maybe she had been the one closing the minuscule gap between them. Cassian didn't dare to assume that.
"Okay." With a nod and a camouflaged sniff, Jyn's fingers slipped away from his ragged up shirt and her blue eyes rose until they met the man's chocolate ones. Cassian was in immense pain, yes, but the way the woman who had fueled the rebellion's dying embers until they'd become a wildfire looked at him made up for it. That longing stirred with worry and fear put him at ease, because he knew he made the right choice when he decided he would die for her.
He was no longer dumbfounded by those sort of thoughts like he had been in Jedha —back when he didn't know why he couldn't leave her behind—, or scared like he had been in Eadu —he had betrayed himself so easily for a woman he barely understood.
No, now Cassian knew. Jyn was a reflection of him —the part of him he had left behind. She was also a force to be reckoned with; a hurricane that had swept him into her chaos the moment they met.
Jyn was everything he had been unconsciously searching for a couple of years already. He would have loved to discover her day by day —the scrappy criminal who had saved him in Jedha; the soft girl who glistened in her tears; the passionate leader who had taken them to a nonstarter victory.
Yet, he accepted they didn't have the luxury of time, so he would take whatever she gave him in those last moments.
"You look like shit." She stated, feigning a nonchalant cynicism whilst giving him an up-and-down.
Cassian let out a half laugh that immediately turned into a grimace due to his most likely broken ribs. How he made it up to the top was beyond his comprehension.
"Can you walk?" She whispered, and this time her true emotions bathed her sentence. Cassian surprised himself by denying with his head.
Without a single word, Jyn awkwardly passed his left arm over her shoulders and hoisted him the best she could. She was limping too, the brunet man realized, although he wouldn't bring it to her attention.
"Do you think anybody's listening?" He asked, trying with all his might not to let his discomfort show. If Jyn heard it, she didn't mention it out loud either.
"I do." she gifted Cassian a smile, genuine and peaceful, before confidently stating, "Someone's out there."
Jyn wasn't the best with words, but she hoped that was enough to hint to Cassian the effect he had had on her. She hoped he understood she decided to fight for the cause because he inspired her to do so.
It took them forever to reach the damn turbolift. Despite Cassian doing the best he could to walk by himself, he could barely take two steps without stumbling, which had Jyn's already sore body tensing the whole time to balance them both. She almost exhaled in alleviation when her hand abandoned Cassian's to press the opening button.
The dimlit elevator gave her a fake sense of security, but did little to erase the concern about the Captain's well-being. Even though she had let go of him and his shoulder blade and crown now rested against the holed up wall, Jyn couldn't bring herself to lower her arms. Out of instinct, she kept them extended towards Cassian, ready to catch him if his legs gave in.
No one could blame her; the man looked like he was about to break into a million pieces.
He would have been bothered by that in any other situation —he was no kid who needed to be pampered, he was capable to hold himself— but the agonizing ache lighting up his body was reflected on Jyn's eyes as they roamed his frame, occasionally looking into his with an unspoken apology.
She didn't know how to help.
K2 would have known, Cassian thought, and felt the nausea coming to him. He had led the droid to his death.
In all fairness, he had probably led every pathfinder to death. Melshi had joked about how Rogue One's mission was a one-way ticket to the hell the had earned.
More nausea.
Did Jyn feel that guilt too? At the end of the day, she hadn't really gotten to know those people. Maybe she did feel it for Chirrut and Baze. Maybe for Bodhi. Maybe even for K2.
At the very least, he knew she felt his own life weighing over her shoulders. With a strained groan, Cassian bit the bullet and turned to face the woman besides him.
Jyn felt her heart skip a bit. With a gasp, she stepped forward, her panicked, shaky hands immediately shooting to hold Cassian's forearms when his position shifted.
He was surprisingly fast to catch one of her hands in his, thumb tracing reassuring circles on its back.
His spy façade had fallen with K-2SO, but only now he was actively allowing her to see through him. She found herself once more admiring how beautiful he was like that; exhausted and calm, still standing strong enough to hold her, staring into her soul with gentle, comforting brown eyes.
"This didn't have to end like this." She confessed, refusing to take a step back and lose the grip she had on Cassian's forearm.
The man inches away from her seemed half taken aback —fuck, even she was—, but not entirely.
"It's alright." He muttered, his free hand squeezing Jyn's own forearm before squeezing her waist. "I chose this."
He did. Jyn tried to remind herself Cassian had been in this fight for long enough to know what was at stake, but it haunted her still, the fact that it took her arrival into his life for it to end.
"I'm sorry."
"Jyn..." She almost preferred the Captain's impersonal front now; the way Cassian's gaze made her feel seen was overwhelming. He carried the understanding of an equal, the tenderness of a friend and the yearning of a lover all at once.
She tried to swallow the lump in her throat while she reached out to cup Cassian's nape.
The man's lids fluttered close with her touch, a content exhale slipping through his parted lips, and Jyn's mind wander what they could have been in a fairer world.
The same Jyn whose life motto had been to live from day to day since she was a child, who had never had the luxury of daydreaming about future plans, became frustrated. She wanted to know this side of Cassian —the genuine, sympathetic Cassian who melted under her touch and smiled proudly at her curt speeches and would die for her in secret—, and it wouldn't even be an option, only a sour what if.
Jyn Erso didn't like the 'what if's. She didn't know if Cassian did, but she didn't really give a lot of thought before standing on her tiptoes to close the embarrassingly small gap between their faces.
It was a just an instant-long abrupt kiss, but for Jyn it sufficed to know it wasn't a 'could've been', but a 'would've been'. The certainty showed in her stomach flipping and the burning feeling on her skin under Cassian's tightening grip and the immediate reciprocation of her actions.
Jyn hadn't imagined that the bittersweet realization that came with that shortlived kiss would bring her peace, but it did.
The badly wounded Captain half chased the woman's cracked lips when she retreated. He didn't have to go far, though, since Jyn's forehead swiftly met his.
He wanted to say something —anything— but words escaped him. Perhaps it was for the best, Cassian thought. Jyn preferred action over talking that might have as well been hot air.
Trusting the woman to keep him up if he lost balance, his right palm abandoned the faux security of the turbolift's wall to caress her dirt-stained cheek with an equally smeared thumb.
Cassian felt a slight relief when her reaction to his touch mirrored the one he was having to her fingers toying with the hair on the back of his neck. He had to use all his willpower not to fall when Jyn snuggled closer, her nose bumping his own.
Having her close felt so natural. It wasn't fair.
Their blown pupils met through low lashes and, right when Jyn seemed to find her voice, an unprompted tremor shook the citadel's tower, making them both stumble and putting out the cold, flickery lights outside the shuttle.
Jyn had been quick to react, acting as a pillar for the pair and simultaneously forcing Cassian's back to lean on the wall again.
"What was that?" She whispered in the dark, and Cassian became well aware of the lack of space between them by the feeling of her hot breath fanning over his neck.
They both knew what it had been, but Cassian chose to shake his head briefly. "I don't know." Shaky breath in, shaky breath out. "We're still going down, right?" He caught himself having to ask. He hated the weak pitch he was forced to use.
"We're still going down." Jyn confirmed, carefully resting her face on his half exposed clavicle.
This time, it was Cassian's right that found Jyn's side, sneaking under vest to feel her closer.
Not even a couple of seconds passed before the lift fully stopped, signaling they had reached the lowest level in a shattered blue screen above the gate.
"Hold on, I'll open the door." Jyn requested in a resolved tone, her fingers slipping away from Cassian's biceps. "I'm going to get you out, Cassian."
That was the first time she used his name with earnest. He liked the way it rolled on her tongue a little too much for someone who was about to die one way or another.
"Wait."
Cassian slightly folded forward to take a hold of his savior's wrist and felt his insides twisting at the movement.
Jyn didn't complain. She didn't rush him or chastise him, she didn't even scold him for coercing his damaged self.
Instead, she obliged and waited; she let herself be brought back to his arms and fisted the collar of his shirt when his mouth desperately found hers once more.
She had had her chance, now he needed his. This time the kiss was messy and rushed and needy —so needy that Jyn wondered if Cassian would have denied it happened afterwards in a more promising scenario.
Cassian was writhing in pain and his own movements were at fault, because he needed Jyn's body burning life in every part of his own her touch could reach. He held her impossibly tight and winced against her lips when her own desperate hands did the same.
He kept up as long as his body allowed him to, moving in sync with Jyn until the pain became unbearable and he had to pull away.
There are worst ways to go, Cassian thought with salty tears caught in his eyelashes and his arms wrapped around the woman whose soul was a bit too similar to his.
"Cassian..." There it was again, that intimate sweetness. "We have to go." She muttered, cupping his stubbled cheeks with her fingerless gloves to plant one last featherlight peck atop his lips.
He nodded and complied, first letting go in order for her to open the gate, then draping his arms over her shoulders so she could drag him out into the unnatural hot of Scarif, and lastly allowing her to choose a place to rest.
A part of Jyn wanted to try and make it to a ship, but she was past the moment of knowing better, so the beach was her best call.
Her mother used to love Lah'mu's shores. 'The sea soothes the soul', she had confided Jyn. She wanted Cassian to have a soothing end, and Scarif's beaches were as beautiful as they could get.
She almost ran out of breath, but somehow managed to get them through the heating sand before Cassian's legs gave in, making them both stumble to their knees.
He had made it further than Jyn fathomed possible, which made a new kind of admiration for the Captain bloom in her chest.
Fixing her hopeless, terrified gaze in the horizon, she surprised herself by thinking how breathtaking the view was. Bizarre was an understatement to describe the uncanny resemblance between the upcoming boiling wave of destruction and the most beautiful sunset she had ever seen.
While she stayed mesmerized by the terrifying sight, Cassian sought comfort in observing her. He tried to imprint her silhouette in his brain through his already blurry glance, in case he would drop dead that same instant.
Her face turned and her apologetic crystal clear irises infused one last bit of life into Cassian. There was a thousand things he wanted to say, but maybe just a handful she would have needed to hear. Cassian wanted to believe he chose the best one.
"Your father would be proud of you, Jyn."
A tight-lipped, grateful smile confirmed it, and he felt content.
Jyn too wanted to return the favor, to give him the closure that, unbeknownst to her, she had already provided, but speech wasn't her strong suit.
Her unsteady hand reached out to his, at first miscalculating but ultimately intertwining with Cassian's fingers. I'm scared, she wanted to say at the feeling of the heat wave scorching her exposed skin.
The man whose job was to read people knew, and with one last effort, he propped himself up on his knees and prompted Jyn to do the same. He found the strength to hold her one last time.
Jyn could have cried in relief right there, but instead enclosed her newfound companion in the tightest of embraces. She heard him sigh peacefully, and felt his palms go all the way up to her shoulder blades while his face snuggled on the crook of her neck.
She plucked up the courage and shielded him from the world as it grew brighter, because she owed him; because he came back and wrapped her in a warm, safe embrace that felt like home at the end of it all.
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rogue-durin-16 · 1 year
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Okay this is even funnier, same Tumblr mutual that reblogged it just commented in AO3
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@addiesfairytalebs what the fuck is this
The difference between AO3 academic scholar commenters and Tumblr little manic racoons always sends me like
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These are from the same fic
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