semporina

[semporina]

waiting on hold

the music is agravating

repetitive

like the thoughts that swirl around my head

feeling better is a lie

being good is a lie

its only temporary

it doesn't last

i know healing isn't linear but im literally sat on the floor listening to hold music crying and wanting to puke

balling my eyes out rn

why is schoool so stressful

also why am i treating tumblr as my notes app

asking him to send me memes so i don't go and like idk do something to hurt myself seems to be working

i hate this

i hate this

i guess i flew just a little too close to the sun

an icarus moment

there is so much i need to do

again why am i treating this like its my notesapp

#notes app poem #dump truck #poem #poetry #studyblr #upside #sad boi shit

[semporina]

everyone is asking from me

projects to finish

photos and files to organize

tests to take

content to learn

deadlines approaching

i'm drowning in to do's

and yet i don't crave air

i don't want to resurface

my instinct is just to let it crash over me

i don't want to let anyone down

but i just don't think i want to breathe anymore

i want to escape to another world

reading a fantasy novel solely to feel a little bit of peace

i feel like im slipping so far backwards

getting so so so much worse

yet i was doing better

yet now

i worry about him

i worry about her

i worry about them

i worry about this

i worry about that

i worry a lot

and yet i do nothing

i can't get up off of the floor so i sit here

hoping

praying it will al go away

i want to feel pain

it makes the overwhelm go away

i want to focus on just one thing

instead of all these thoughts swirling around inside my head

#dumb brain things #brain dump #overwhelm #free verse #free form #poetry #sad girl #stress #burnout gifted kid

[semporina]

Why is texting girls so hard

[semporina]

a fragment

the smell of sunglasses, lingering sunscreen. golden vision

[semporina]

looking back on me and him is like rewatching la la land over and over again. yes the music is great and the love is beautiful. the ending breaks my heart every time. i pulled the trigger but i shot me when i said it was over. when i said i hated him. i meant i hate myself. and now i’m walking around at night trying to not fall apart.

i’m sick of loosing soulmates

i can finally see you’re as fucked up as me so how do we win

don’t tell me that it’s over, the book of you and i

there were so many chapters we never got to write

now i’m missing bits and pieces

i wrote about how i wished you’d stayed.

i lost a friend

i lost my mind

if the world was ending you’d come over right

(you said you would. you said you would so many times. every time i asked you. you said you would)

i’d rather date an idea something i’ll never find

so i’ll live in the moment but i’m never happy here

i’m surrounded by greener looking times

am i the only one wishing life away.

i’m sick of faking diary entries.

#poem #poetry #love #love poem #found poem #notes app my beloved #notes app poetry #notes app expose #song lyrics #found poetry

[semporina]

rewatching

it’s the same story again and again

i’m sick of loosing you

who would i be without you?

you’re part of everything i do

every song makes me think of you

i don’t want you back

but i love you still

i can finally see you’re as fucked up as me

we have no way to win

i love you

i’m worn thin

i need to take my own path

#poem #poetry #love #love poem #found poem #books & libraries #student #lonely #alone #toxic relationship #relationship #breakup #broken

[semporina]

a bisexual mess

pretty girl

funny boy

one makes me smile

the other also makes me smile

she’s unattainable

unavailable

out of reach

he’s not my type

yet he brings joy

so much joy

why am i such a mess

neither are as fucked up as me

#poem #poetry #love #biseuxal #bi #lonely #bisexual mess #found poem #shitty poem #shitty poetry #love poem #lonewolf #lonelier version of you #not a love poem #queer #notes app my beloved #notes app poetry

[semporina]

bad days

you were my sunshine

now there’s only black days

monsoons fill my days

but it’s not because you’re gone

they came before i lost you

you brought sunlight for a few days a year

your side effects included sorrow

grief

helplessness

and addiction

someone should have told me i was overdosing

chasing that gosh dang dragon

you’re the dragon

i’m the addict

i’m the damsel

you’re the dragon

i’m the knight

but

i can’t slay you

i never could

never will be able to

i love you to much

to much to hurt

so much it hurts

lying all the time

too in love to cry

can’t tell my momma

she never knew

she should be here

but i couldn’t tell her

you got mad because i shared what you said

i said things i regret

i hope you regret what you said

i hope one day you’ll know i love you too much my own good

i know you’ll never read this

i know you’ll always be in my life

cont have you.

can’t get rid of you

but this is goodbye.

our last chapter has come to a close

our epilogue is done

goodbye

my dear

dear

sweet nothing

#poem #poetry #love #love poem #found poem #breakup #sad? #sad poem #sadboimusic #sad boi hours #sad boi poetry #sad girl #lonely #pining #longing

[semporina]

<3

nothing

it was young love.

the kind where you are too young.

the kind where you don’t understand what you’re on the verge of.

i had far flung,

fantasies of what could have begun.

no way of knowing what love was.

yet, we were too high strung.

we didn’t even know the beauty it was.

in the beginning i was obsessive.

staring across the room at you.

even though you were elusive.

i loved you through and through.

then later you broke my heart, left me feeling blue.

now, i don’t even know what it was.

i wish we could start anew.

we didn’t even know the beauty it was.

now, i know i am in love.

but, i am not ready.

i don’t know what we’re on the verge of.

will we end up going steady?

my heart is no iron lady.

that’s no simile, no like or as.

my heart is unsteady.

qe didn’t even know the beauty it was.

i can’t wish my life away,

this is no wizard of oz.

for some reason, I know you won’t lead me astray.

we didn’t even know the beauty it was.

[semporina]

sober

i am getting drunker 

and drunker off you

you’re like a drug to me

i’ve never truly quit

i tried to manage my addiction

but i want back to you

i’m addicted again

i need to get clean

truly clean

you’re no good for me

#old #poem #addictive personality

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TRASH

i am...

Thoughtful (or so i’d like to think)

Responsible (or so i am told)

An asshole magnet

Sexy (jk) Smart (o so i think i am)

Helpful (or i’d like to think i am)

#trash #anagrams #poem

[semporina]

insanity

doing the same thing over

and over expecting different results

third time isn’t the charm

third time means im insane

third time means i have no self control

third time means i should know better.

i am going insane

doing the same thing over and over again

i keep going back to you

i keep trying to get you out of my head

i keep texting you

i keep wanting a different you

i am expecting different results

you

havent

changed

all 

that 

much

i keep falling for the broken boy

i keep wanting to fix them

i keep failing to make them whole again

i keep getting hurt by them

doing the same thing over and over again

i 

cant

change

them

i keep hurting myself

i keep knowing i shouldnt

i keep hoping this time its different

i keep ignoring all the red flags

i am doing the same thing over and over again

i 

am 

expecting

different

results

i know it won’t be different 

but i dont care

i want to be hurt

i want to feel alive

you made me feel alive

i want to feel something

#late night #poetry #sad? #broken heart #heartbreak

[semporina]

self destruction

picking away

wearing down

he breaks

he shouts

relief.

i cry 

and cry 

till i can

cry no more.

only when i have made myself hurt can i cry

its only when i destroy that i can feel okay.

[semporina]

love songs (another version)

forever on the dancefloor

going hand in hand though life

you are the only remedy i know for a broken heart

you are in many ways my soulmate

i don’t know if i believe in soulmates

but i do know i believe in us

you are the remedy for a broken heart

when you’re around there are no hearts that break

just souls you set on fire

when you're around i’m always way less sad

#found poem #love poem #poem #love #songs

[semporina]

love songs

youre the only remedy for a broken heart i know of

when you’re around i’m always way less sad

forever on the dance floor

going hand in hand through life

there are no hearts that break around here

just two souls on fire

can we go where no one else goes

to somewhere only we know

we can fall in love under the stars

just give me a time and a place

#poem #found poem #song quotes #love #love poem

[semporina]

i want to

i know for sure i want to

slow dance at 2 am in the kitchen with you

make pancakes on a saturday morning for you

sing along to throwback songs together

get lost with you

take you to my favorite restaurants

introduce you to my family

show you off to all my friends

fall in love under the stars

i know all of this is in our future

i know i want these things to happen

but i can’t count on them

for now.

i can only be sure of my love for you.

its unwaivering

strong

and lasting

i don’t need nothing else but you.

#younglove #love #poem #lovepoem #free verse

[semporina]

the future

the future.

it’s scary

unknown

anxiety inducing

there is nothing we can be sure of

*almost

almost nothing we can be sure of.

for i am sure of one thing

just one thing.

i know one thing.

i love you.

i love you.

i love you.

i.

love.

you.

no matter what happens

no matter where we go

no matter what people say

i.

love.

you.

#poetry #poem #love poetry #free verse #young love