sftykth

[sftykth]

genuinely one of my favourite series i have ever read. the writing is just so perfect captures every emotion so well. such a unique and interesting story that i have read. it’s hard to find fanfics with different plots. but this series definitely have hit it well!! aaaaaa i will miss it once it ends please 🥺 the couple have my heart !! i know tae is a lil bit creepy.. well a lot! but i’m still kinda rooting for them 🥹

Creep - Five ft. KTH (m)

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader

Features: Dr. Park, Jizz extraordinaire Jungkook, Aging backward Seokjin, a soft Yoongi.

Summary: Taehyung and reader have a much needed talk. Things are just too creepy.

Genre: Dilf Tae au, light smut, heavy angst, definitely creepiness and there’s no fluff. just a dad living his life

Word count: 18.8k!

Creep Masterlist

Warnings: Lots of painful conversations. stalking, breaking and entering, masturbation, crying, confessions, jizz bag story, meatheads at a strip club, semen is spread, alcohol, too much drinking, some vaginas smell good, some don’t, readers straight up leaves, breaking an entering, cum om furniture, strippers, exes, face water, birthday shots, vomiting on things, ew, 

A/N: This is a repost. Tumblr ate the OG post.

Have questions to ask the characters? Or want to see what else characters have to say? Click here- characters answer questions or SEND AN ASK! CREEP PLAYLIST

[Song suggestion: Telephones by Vacations]

Taehyung hasn’t slept. Instead of sleeping, he’s been staring at his phone. Well, mainly the clock on the phone. 

And when his eyes weren’t on the digital device they were glancing up to his window blinds to see if your lights would come on. 

They don’t.

He rubs his eyes as he looks at the clock again. It’s almost 5:00am.  

There’s been no movement behind your window. It was about twenty-two minutes ago when he walked into the common area and glanced up at your back balcony window. That lamp that you liked to keep on when you were away was lit. 

There was a time not too long, he awakened in your bed, and then shuffled off to get a glass of water. Shuffling in the dark, hands sliding against the wall, only to eventually stub his pinky toe into the corner of the wall because he couldn’t see shit. All the lights were off in your place.

You told him that you liked to sleep in pitch black when you placed a packed bag of ice on his foot, pointing to the blackout curtains that hang from above your bedroom window.

That light signals that you are not home. That’s what the fucking dumb, holding vigil piece of shit lamp spelled. You're somewhere else at this hour. The hours of fucking and making bad choices. Sometimes the two were one in the same.

Taehyung sulks at his Nespresso machine, debating if he should try to drink the beverage you and Yoongi were obsessed with. There are still several hours left until he’s to meet with you. 

He doesn’t need caffeine, he can push through. 

Taehyung can stay awake. He will head to the kitchen. His eyes pull toward the time, but the one on his stove. Already, his brain is calculating how long he’s been awake. It’s almost been twenty-four hours since Taehyung last slept. 

Waking up to get his kids ready for school at 6:00am. Taking the kids to McDonald’s to exchange them with Sunmi. Dinner service. The bar. You and this fucking Hoseok guy cuddled on the couch like lovers.

That’s what's bothering him. That’s what was keeping him up. You looked beyond comfortable with this guy. 

And Taehyung had been keeping his eye on you for months. Carefully listening against your exterior wall every now and then to see if he could hear you if he could not see you. 

Then once he begins fucking you this guy is texting and calling you. You said he was a friend and then introduced him as a co-worker. 

Why the switch up? 

It all made his brain ache.

Taehyung doesn’t know when he fell asleep all he knows is that he’s now waking up with a crick in his neck. 

The table doesn’t not make a good bed and his arms made terrible pillows. It’s 10:41a.m. his phone notifies him.

He takes his time to stand, all the muscles in his body are screaming in protest. But he needs to get ready. He needs to get ready to see you. His bastard of a dick twitches at the thought. Yet his feet are leading him to his window. 

Your blinds are open. You are home. 

That realization sinks into his pores quickly, causing blood to shoot through his veins and jolt his brain fully awake. He’s moving faster now, reaching into his fridge to grab the container of apple juice.  Seeing there’s only so much, a glass wasn’t needed. He finished off the bottle and tossed into the recycling bin.

With that Taehyung is off to get scrubbed and ready to face you. He tries to steady his breath as the water stream beats the skin on his shoulders. He’s ready to make amends. He knows that he crossed some boundaries with you, but it still didn’t excuse the fact that you keep skirting around what the fuck the two of you were doing. 

After his shower he’s tugging on a brown sweatshirt, olive parachute pants. His long hair won’t obey, so he’s snatching a mustard beanie over his head and shoving his feet into his slippers. He glances at the watch on his wrist.

[Song suggestion: THREE STRIKES by Honne ft. Khalid]

It’s 11:42a.m. Taehyung tries to wait. He reviews the sales for the restaurant. They sold out of last night’s specials. This time of year was a money rake.

11:47a.m.

He tried but he can’t wait anymore. He would rather be early, than on time and even worse, late.

His breath is shallow as he steps into the freshness of the day. It's cold out, the rush of the hot air from his lungs is mixing with the early afternoon chill. Warm misty clouds puff from his mouth and he quickly rubs his hands together before he’s knocking on the door. 

Three solid raps onto the wood with the knuckle of his pointer finger.

The door opens almost immediately.  

You swing it widely, before you’re instantly turning and walking back into your living room. Only your fingertips gracing the edge of door are his greeting.

Taehyung's lips feel dry, so he licks them as he steps inside. He’s closing the door and takes a moment to inspect your place.

It’s dark inside. 

Even though the sun is already high in the sky. Only a little light is coming into the balcony glass door, causing his eyes to struggle to adjust. 

It’s also eerily quiet. 

Every time he has been over, music is either playing from the Bluetooth speaker in your kitchen, the tv was on some Netflix series or your voice is filling the empty spaces of the home.

You’re taking a seat on your couch, the clutter of pillows crowd you easily. The familiar green robe is wrapped half haphazardly around your shoulders.

But you are not bare. Not this time. 

A royal blue jumper sits beneath the luxurious emerald garment and it stops at your mid-thigh.

Taehyung swallows hard as he stalks closer to you. The air feels odd, but his pull to you is still there. It's undeniable. And as he gets closer, you are eyeing him wearily while your hands fist by your side. 

Should he sit beside you? 

Taehyung sees a knitted pouf ottoman nestled between the corner of your couch and the wall. He grabs it, pulling it closer in proximity to you before he sits on his haunches. His gaze is a bit lower than yours. But he doesn’t care. You should always be slightly above him. 

It seems fitting and natural to him.

Your eyes move to the hands which are folded in your lap and they stay there. You look like a beautiful statue.

“Y/N,” Taehyung whispers softly, the sound of your name vibrating in his chest. Feels so good to him.

His fingers reach out and graze the velvet of your calf. The skin rises in response to his caress and your eyes close briefly before fluttering open. You’re still picking up on the messages he’s sending you.

He wants you.

“Tae,” your voice holds a warning and you’re adjusting so your legs fold onto the couch. 

He doesn’t say anything, but then his lip aches. He’s been biting into it hard. Trying his best to let you say what you need to say. 

He’s been waiting all night for you to say something. Anything. 

Spotting one of your blankets, and he tugs it over your thighs. Must keep you warm. It’s cold out.

“We need to talk,” you say matter-of-factly, shoving the offered blanket off of you. 

Taehyung lets out a huge puff of air from his lungs. He feels dizzy for a moment.  The past was suddenly blending with the present.

Your voice almost sounded like Sunmi’s when you said those four words.

“Who is he? Who’s Hoseok?” Taehyung rambles out before letting you begin whatever assault you had planned for him. 

He needs to know who the fuck he really is.

You’re the one sighing now as you are straightening and then leaning further into the back cushions. Fingers gather the edges of your robe and your hands wrap it around your body.

Why are you hiding away from him?

“I will tell you all you want to know. If you promise to tell me everything I want to know,” you say steadily, resting your elbows on your bent knees.

“Whatever you wanna know darling,” he nods, fingers stretching out, the very tips curving along the joint, loving your flesh against his.

Taehyung loves touching you. He needs to touch you.

How is he supposed to be in the same space as you and not be within fingertips reach? He supposes he’ll never know.

You’re nodding. “Okay. Hoseok is my co-worker. And he’s also my ex-fiancé.”

Stop. 

His fingertips come to a complete fucking stop as his brain trips around the new information. 

Part of him wants to react. But who is the fuck is he kidding? He has a whole fucking ex-wife. Not to mention three young kids. 

He’s not going to say anything. He can listen to you. Let you finish. Life fucking happened before him and will continue when you’re with him. 

“Alright,” Taehyung’s fingers are moving again. His middle finger traces a circle on your skin, his eyes focus on the pattern. It soothes him. “Are you sleeping with him?”

Now he’s curious about your eyes right now. They always speak louder than your actual words.

“I hav-”

“Were you with him last night?” Taehyung interrupts. You slide your leg away from his touch. He wasn’t realizing his tracing had become two fingers pinching your flesh.

“Yes, but not like that,” you mutter shakily and there’s something in that tone. Something your mouth isn’t saying but your eyes are.

Taehyung’s processing the information you just gave him when you’re suddenly asking him a question.

[Song suggestion: YKWIM by Yot Club]

“Is this yours?” You are holding out an arm to him, palm flat and open. In the center of your hand is the AirTag with a heart on it.

The world is spinning again. And he blinks several times to clear his vision. And when it does clear, you're looking at him. 

And for the first time he realizes that it looks like you’ve been crying.

He’s nodding and then he’s doing his best to explain. Because your eyes are watering. And he doesn’t want them to reveal what they’re holding. 

“I was just worried about you darling. And I bought it for Mazzy, Ella’s lov-”

“Are there more of them in here…the Airtags? On my person?” You interrogate, surveying the room and then pressing your hands to your chest, palms to breasts. 

Taehyung’s reaching up to grab your hands. “There’s nothing else. I promise. I’m sorry,” He rises and presses his lips to yours.

“I forgive you for not telling me about Hoseok. Now, forgive me.” 

“It’s not the same Tae, you tracked me without my consent. You hid it,” you huff and rub your eyes tiredly.

“It’s kind of similar actually. You hid that you've been talking to your ex-fiancé this whole time. You told me he was your co-worker,” Taehyung shrugs.

You study one another. But you let him finally hold your hand. And he’s gets hopeful when you squeeze his fingers.

“I know you’ve been watching me. Tell me for how long. Tell me everything, Tae.” Your thumb caresses the skin on the back of his hand. 

“I didn’-”

“Tae, one of the things I like in a man is honesty. Be honest with me.”

Your voice is featherlight. And he feels so good that you notice that he tries his best to be completely transparent with you. He wishes you would do the same with him. 

All humans have their superpowers. 

His happens to be honesty. 

Just because he didn’t divulge everything to everyone doesn’t mean he was being deceitful. Sure we omitted information, but he rarely lied. 

Rarely.

Besides, Taehyung couldn’t lie to you anyway right now if he wanted to. Your eyes are tugging the truth out of him. His whole aura feels under the influence of you, his judgment is clouded. 

“One hundred and nineteen days. That’s how long I’ve been watching you.”

He sees your eyes dilate for a moment before narrowing at his confession. 

“But not like every day. Just like the first time I saw you in your window and couldn’t stop thinking about you was one hundred and nineteen days ago.” 

Taehyung is panting. His breath coming out hot and fast. He feels better.

Your lips press tight together. And the grip he has on your wrist tightens automatically.

He just needs to keep you with him. 

Needs you to look at him and not get lost in all that he just said. To look at him. To remember that you respond to his touch. To him. 

And you do. You do respond. 

Your eyes widen and your lips part slightly before you nod for him to continue. 

His words were all semantics. What he meant is he was taken by you. He couldn't help but drown you with attention.

Taehyung does continue.

He weaves the story of seeing you the first time as you were sweeping your floor. Regales you of all the information he pumped out of Maya. Told you about Maya telling him all about the fiancé you let go of because you were bored. 

Knew you had a fiancé but he didn’t know the fiancé was THE Hoseok.

As Taehyung continues, he notices you haven’t interrupted him. You haven’t asked one question. You just watch him as he details your habits, your schedules and oh, him jerking off in the common area after seeing you half naked that one evening. 

That’s when you react. Taehyung’s sure he has been rambling for at least an hour. And it was there that you gulp loudly.

It’s time for a break. 

His tongue hurts from the words that have been tumbling out of his freely mouth.

“Let me make you some tea,” he announces, getting up and easily moving to your kitchen. He feels lighter. A lot lighter than he felt two hours ago. 

You’re watching him as he moves to the cupboard that holds your teapot and then the small drawer that the ginger tea you like to sip on is nestled. 

Every movement is accessed by your gaze. Evaluating him. 

After filling up the teapot, he clicks the burner on and then looks over you.

“Are you hungry? Did you eat?” He asks, opening your refrigerator to scope what you had.

A bunch of arugula, mushrooms, butter…

“I’m not hungry, Taehyung.”

That gets his attention. He let’s go of the fridge handle and lets the refrigerator door clap closed. 

What. Are. You. Doing?

Why are you saying his whole fucking name like that?

You have called him Tae. 

Mr. Mom. Your date. Or your neighbor. 

But he can’t recall the last time you referred to him as Taehyung.

“You’re not still upset about the AirTag are you?” Taehyung chastises as he rounds your kitchen counter to move back into the living room, closer to you.

Suddenly, you feel far away. Even though you're steps from him.

Your eyes slide away from him and  over to your glass balcony door. Lips nibbling on a piece of skin chapped there. 

“Taehyung, I just think we need some space.”

“What?” 

He’s rushing to you and you’re cowering away from him. Legs pulled toward your chest and arms wrapped around them.

Panic is etched across your face. 

What has he done? What has he done that has made you look at him like this?

“Are you scared of me? Mad at me? You know I would never hurt you, right?” Taehyung babbles as he nudges the pouf he was sitting on over with the tip of his slipper. Taking its place and floundering to his knees. 

Grateful that the rug is there but damn the hardness of the floor still jolts his system. But that’s fine. He’ll suffer if it keeps you from saying what he thinks you’re trying to say. 

Taehyung is yanking your legs away from your body so he can bury his face between them. His nose skimming at the crux of your thighs. Damn, you smell so good. His tongue traces the seam between your legs and your skin is so smooth.

You’re wiggling away from him and his arms wrap around your waist.

“Don’t do this, darling. I won’t do it again. I will never follow you without your consent again.” He can feel tears swimming behind his eyelids. 

Taehyung does not cry. 

He’s never cried as a man. Crying at his grandparents’ funerals and the birth of his children, doesn’t count. 

Yet here he is, trying his best to swallow his tears. Whimpers are clawing up his throat and he’s biting down hard on his lip to keep them at bay.

Your hands find the top of his head and they pet down until they’re cupping his cheeks. 

“Taehyung. I like you.”

“I love you,” he blurts out, voice shaking with exhaustion. Exhausted from holding all the words as long as he has. 

And now his tears break free, rolling down his face. A few dip into the corner of his lips. The taste of them is salty and pathetic.

“Love?"

"Taehyung, you don’t know me,” you state firmly, big concerned eyes bouncing between his.

“But I do,” his tone is hollow and broken. Every word is a hiccup. He needs to see your face but he can’t  because of the tears pouring out his eyes and down his cheeks.

Why would you need space? You just admitted that you liked him. He’ll tell you everything. Just like you requested when this conversation began.

“You love to eat Milka cookies as a bedtime snack. You love Harry Potter books and you read all of the stories like twice a year. You have an unhealthy relationship with root vegetables. You need an iced vanilla latte all day, everyday. if you can help it. You love to bake and you don’t think I noticed it. But I have. Those donuts, the ones you brought for my kids and saved my ass for breakfast? You made them.”

Taehyung is out of breath and his nose is leaking. One of his hands lets go of your waist so it can wipe at his face. It’s so wet. 

You’re looking at him as you lick your lips. Your eyebrows are knitted together and now your eyes are small, squinting. 

“Taehyung…”

“Don’t Taehyung me. Please don’t. Just keep calling me Tae,” he whines, digging his head back between your legs. 

All Taehyung can hear is his pounding heart and sniffles from his nose.

“Okay, T-tae. It sounds like you do know me,” Taehyung israising his head to look at you again, at the sound of his nickname. 

You’re biting on your thermal painted thumbnail. That's another thing he knows.

You fucking paint your nails almost every other day. 

“But I don’t know anything about you.”

“Yes, you do,” he argues, arms tugging your waist to bring you closer to him. He cranes his neck so your lips are near his. 

“You know I’m Kim Taehyung, owner and head chef of Ella’s, the restaurant named after my princess. You’ve met my kids. You’ve hung out with them. And like you said not too long ago, ‘They’re part of me’. You know me, Y/N,” he whispers, his arms are wrapping tighter around your waist and drawing you closer still. 

His lips dust the skin beneath your jaw while your knees hit his stomach, causing him to grunt lowly. Your legs are pressed tight together. He’s done this many times, pulling you close and your legs would easily spread for him.

But they don't right now.

“Y/N,” he whispers again. His fucking bottom lip is trembling, he can't even kiss you. His teeth work down to get it under control.

“Tae, I don’t even know your birthday or your favorite col-”

“December 30th, twenty-one days away. Forest green and brown are my favorite colors,” he confesses.

You stare at him. And he tugs again and your legs open just a bit. He’s getting closer to his favorite place. 

But Taehyung doesn't mind working for it. You're worth the work.

You were his. He didn’t give a fuck about Hoseok. You weren’t saying that asshole’s name when he had his dick deep in your gut.

Taehyung bends; his hair brushing down your torso as he lands kisses to the tops of your thighs. 

You smell wonderful. You feel divine. 

"I will worship you for countless days and nights on my knees if that's what you wanted. If that would make you stop all this ridiculous talk."

One of his hands slides from your middle and comes to rest above your mound.

You're tensing under him, immediately  and pushing his shoulders back. 

"It's not ridiculous, Tae. I liked you, but you tracked me without my permission. And then you almost got into a fight with Hoseok. I just don't know who you are."

Taehyung is confused. He is scrunching up as you're adjusting and your knees are pushing against his stomach again.

His hand becomes trapped between your thighs. He snatches it out of your warm tight snare and places his shaky palm on the top of your leg. 

"Y/N, I want you to get to know me better. I should've said this weeks ago, but I want to be with you. I don't want you entertaining the company of no-" 

"Tae, I need space. Hoseok wants to work things out and I should've told you that. I-"

"Please don't go back to him. He's already had a chance. Give me one. Give a chance," Taehyung begs, scrambling to wrap his other arm back around you and you're crawling up onto the couch, away from him. 

You stand on the cushions and then step around him, feet meeting the floor.

And now he’s the one crawling, his clothed knees muddle against the rug, making his movements sluggish and jerky.

“What do you need? Whatever you want. I will give it to you,” he sobs as his fingertips struggle to make contact. 

You let him wrap his arms around you. His face slides against your delicately covered stomach. His nose presses against the fabric, your warmth. His tears are staining it. 

“I need you to leave, Tae. I need space," you whisper. He allows you to unwrap his arms from your waist and once free you're stepping back from him. 

Taehyung looks at you and the image breaks his heart. You’re closing the robe tight around you and the sash around it tighter. You're folding into yourself. And your eyes? They avoid his gaze.

And he realizes that anything he says right now, it won’t matter. 

Your mind is made up.

You’re a stubborn woman. You’re a stubborn and messy woman. 

And possibly a woman, who Taehyung just lost a chance with forever.

[Song suggestion: Solitude by Billie Holiday]

Taehyung fucking misses you. It's been seven days since he's heard from you or seen you. 

As requested, he has given you space. Physically. 

But, emotionally? Taehyung has tried. He has had enough. You never specified what space means to you.

All he know is you belong to him. And he loves you. 

These two facts are what has him still trying to reach you through the phone. He texted you every morning and before he fell asleep every night since. 

The texts were casual: 

"Good morning.”

“Good night.”

“Miss you.”

“Love you.”

After every message he sent only made him more irritated at the fact you were using an Android and not an iPhone. 

He didn’t know if you were even reading his texts or not. Every single text felt like sending a heartfelt speck of dust into the universe.

Taehyung only hopes you would at least see his texts and that you haven't blocked him. If you forgive him. He'll see if you're open to getting a new iPhone. 

He'd be more than happy to buy one for you.

And because you didn't respond to his texts, he found himself calling you. When he really missed you. Hearing you on your voicemail made him feel good. 

Taehyung doesn't think the messages made much sense. Mostly he would tell you he was thinking about you. That he missed you. Hope you were well.

One thing he didn't include was asking you to call him back. He didn't want you to feel like he was enclosing on the space you requested.

But your voicemail inbox became full three days ago. So he can't even leave you anymore messages.

But he was tired of text messages. And voicemails. That's not what your needed. Those forms of communication weren't romantic.

You needed romance. Deserved nothing less.

So he bought flowers. The same bouquet as your first official date. Only bigger. And more petals.

He left the them, wrapped in blue tissue paper on your Fuck Off doormat.

It’s now day two and the fucking flowers are pretty much dead. They're not potpourri. 

Not yet. 

But they are withering pathetically on the door mat. 

The whole fucking scene mocks him.

A sunshine face with the words 'fuck off' in conjunction with his piss poor excuse of romance wilting from neglect is poetic justice.

Seems about fucking right.

You deserve romance. And he deserves the pain. It's a learning lesson about how to love you right. The way you want.

Yet Taehyung's blood simmers in his veins when he lets his mind wander to the fact that you aren't and haven't been home.

If he had to guess, he thinks you departed at some point when he left to get his kids from school after your request for “space".

Space. 

How much did you need? 

Taehyung's been holding vigil by his window every chance he gets. That damn light in your back patio window has steady been on even in the daytime.

Did you need so much space that even walls between you and him was not enough?

As he retrieves the dying bouquet, pink and white petals trail behind him as he carries it in his hand back into his place. 

And he thinks what a pity you never got to see this bouquet. If the tiny one he gave you on the date put a smile on your face, surely this bouquet would have a bigger impact.

"That's it," he huffs to himself as he stuffs the flowers into his trash bin. 

Taehyung will have flowers delivered to the place you typically were at this time of day a week or two ago. 

He wants to keep his promise. He will not follow you. 

And he's not going to make direct contact either. This wasn't what he was trying to do with the flowers. 

Taehyung just needs you to remember him.

Remember what the two of you had together.

That he loves you even though you think he doesn't know you. But his heart knows you. It recognized your yours immediately.

He knows you’ve felt what he’s been feeling. You have reacted to every touch he’s given you since day one. 

Now that he thinks about it, you're like an exotic flower. He would like to think that his presence in your life has helped you bloom in some way. 

Taehyung's watched you from afar and he has seen you up close. There was denying that you opened up and brightened when he was around. 

The flower to his sun.

[Song suggestion: Blister In The Sun by Violent Femmes]

Before he knows it he is pulling out his phone and making a few calls.

Taehyung is a man of his word. He felt proud of himself when he ordered the same bouquet but the destination was different. 

And he did not deliver them. He had someone else do that. 

He waited in the parking lot. Across from the delivery address.  Watching if the flowers came back with the deliverer. 

They did not.

“Did you see her?” He asks Yoongi as the raven mullet hair man yanks on his Jeep’s passenger door and settles into the seat next to them. 

Yoongi rakes a hand through his hair and scratches at his scalp a moment before shaking his head. 

“I didn’t man. There was some assistant who said Y/N was in a meeting, but she’ll make sure she gets it.”

Taehyung’s heart lifts with hope. You’re here. He’s closer to you than he’s ever been in a week. 

“Thank you Yoongi,” Taehyung offers before pulling his smaller friend into his chest, arms wrapping around his shoulders.

The addict smells like the drug of his choice. Coffee. The scent is strong and powerful. His body tenses under Taehyung’s hold a moment before melting into it.

“Yeah man. You say you love her. Of course I’ll help you.”

Okay. So maybe Taehyung did not tell Yoongi everything that has transpired. But those were just minor details. Omission not deception.

The foundation. The foundation of it all is that you like him. And Taehyung loves you. 

And there’s a chance that your ‘like’ of him could evolve some day, some hour or some minute into love. The possibility is still there. You haven’t closed the door on that, yet. 

Taehyung continues to embrace his friend a moment more. 

The hugs he needs usually from his kids but he didn't have them this week. He hadn’t hugged anyone except for you and that was several days ago.

“Alright, I usually only accept this type of gratitude after I have my dick sucked.”

Taehyung gasps and pulls away, looking at the other man’s eyes. 

Yoongi's eyes are crescents and smirk lines his lips. “But the only gratitude I will accept today, from you is a fucking espresso.”

"Deal. I’ll grab you one after I pick up the monsters," Taehyung agrees, peels himself from his friend.

“Ugh,” Yoongi groans. “You better be glad that I like your kids or this could be a different story.”

[Song suggestion: Dreams by Night Tapes]

You: Got your flowers Tae. I still need time. Please give that to me.

That’s the text you sent him four hours ago. And you received the flowers six hours before that.

First, space. Now, time.

You asked for some time. Time is temporary.

But still, Taehyung can’t sleep. This doesn't feel like time and space is what you’re asking for. 

It sounds like you are asking for him to erase you from his memory?

How’s he supposed to do that? 

How is he supposed to erase you? 

You’re scratched into his brain. His pulse beats with yours. You are part of him. If he erases you that means he has to cut a part of himself away.

Is that what you want? 

He has to get out of bed. 

No, he needs to get out of this room. It’s too hot. And the walls seem to close around him by the minute.

Taehyung walks into the hallway and pauses. Soft snores and breaths greet his ears and his heartbeat slows a little. He’s tiptoeing to slightly open the door where the soft sounds emanate, pushing it gingerly with his fingertips. 

There's the silky crowns of heads and a few feet dangling over the edge of the beds. Those strands. Those limbs, they belong to him. They are his. He loves them so. 

He needs to smell what belongs to him. 

Taehyung's movements are slow and steady. He moves to Nat on the full-size bed. The boy is sleeping alone. 

He peers down close and examines the small beauty mark that rests on the young one's cheek. It’s one of the things that separates him from his brother. Nat is very proud of his mark.

Placing a small kiss as he sniffs, Taehyung can feel his roiling emotions settling. Decompression occurring. 

And soon, he’s proceeding to the wood bunk bed that sits on the opposite side of the room. It carries the tender bodies of the remaining two who are half him. 

The top bunk is his first stop. The rungs creak under his weight as he ascends but it's not the sound that makes him shake with anxiety.

Ever since Taehyung put the damn thing together, he was worried it was going to collapse. He knew his way around some tools, but assembling the bunk bed felt like piecing Mount Everest together. 

Maybe he should have Yoongi take a look at it next week? His friend is good with his hands.

Ella shuffles under her covers as he leans in close to kiss her cheek. His hand pets the top of her head and she lets out a contented sigh that makes him smile. 

The reveal of a smile is not lost on him. Taehyung hasn’t smiled much in the last week. It felt odd on his face.

By the time he’s given all his kids kisses and nuzzles, he’s creeping back to the hallway. But he doesn’t want to sleep so laying in bed is pointless.

For a moment he finds refuge in the kitchen as he sips water and then eats a banana. But then he’s staring at his closed blinds. And then he’s peeking in between the slats. 

Your light is still off. 

He feels his lips that were resting in a neutral position pull down even further than before. 

Where are you? 

If you’re not home where have you been staying?

Taehyung lights the candle he bought at the jazz in the park with you with a match. Your candle. Her. 

He just wants to smell you. He could grab the panties but that's for emergency circumstances. And if he smelled them, he would end up initiating the saddest jerk off of his life.

He can’t smell them because it will only fuel his desire to close space between you. But his dick only has a small grudge in this battle. It’s his brain and heart who are at war. 

Are you staying with one of your lady friends? Or worse maybe you’ve been with Hoseok this whole time?

“Fuck,” he hisses as the match he used to light the candle stings his hand. 

He’s sucking on the fresh burn on his thumb as he gazes at your door. His eyes wander to the fucking rosemary bush. It looks thirsty as ever.

Taehyung huffs, grabbing his unfinished glass of water, tucking on his slippers and pulling his front door open. He lets the door shut softly before he's marching toward the damn neglected robust plant. It’s grown since he last watered. 

Sun, water, and attention. It’s not that hard.

His fingers press against the spindly branches, making room so he can touch the dirt. It’s bone dry. 

But what's that? 

Taehyung presses again because something feels hard under the pads of his fingertips. 

Maybe it’s a rock?

Pointer finger bulldozes down and wraps around the object before tugging. 

He retrieves it, fingers brushing off the clumps of soil that cling to the surface. 

Again. His hands are shaking, again. 

Is this…

He stares down at the object in his palm. Fingers curling around the edges, and the metal teeth bite into his skin.

It’s real. 

But is it what he thinks it is?

Taehyung’s free sweaty palm wipes down his flannel pants as he looks up and then down the corridor. No one is here. 

It’s late. Put it back. 

But what if?

What if it does go to your door? Should he just leave it in a rather obvious place? That’s not safe.

First, just check to see if it fits. 

“If it doesn’t fit. I’ll put it back,” Taehyung mutters to himself as he gets closer to your door.

Positioning the weathered key, his hand wobbles as he takes a deep breath and then slides it into the lock. It replies with a gentle click. And when he turns the knob, it moves easily. 

His mouth is open. It is. 

Did you leave this for him? Did you?

The door opens slightly and he’s shutting it quickly. Breathing ragged again. 

He can’t do this. 

What is he doing? Was he going to go inside? 

He can’t do that. Can he?

Taehyung’s turning the key in the opposite direction and then twisting the knob. It’s met with resistance. The door is locked. 

He’s done nothing wrong. He only tested the key. 

But he can’t put the key back. It’s unsafe to do so. It’s unsafe for just anyone to stumble upon the gatekeeper to your home.

He’ll keep it safe, he thinks as the key slides into his pocket. As he makes his way back into his condo, he’s suddenly feeling tired, very tired. 

Slowly he walks to the lit candle in front of his window, blows it out and then closes his blinds. 

He will think of what to do with the key, but for now he needs rest. And on the way to his bed, the key sits warmly against his thigh and the feeling soothes him.

 [Song suggestion: How was Your Day? by beabadoobee]

The feeling of comfort from the key is fleeting though. 

Because once Monday morning arrives, Taehyung's kids are off to school and the key is weighing in his pocket like a stone. 

Taehyung carried it everyday. It felt like you were there with him as he moved throughout his days.

He couldn’t think of what to do with the key. It’s not that he couldn’t think of a thing to do. 

It was the opposite. He had too many options of what to do with it.

He argued with himself to put it back in the pot. 

But then again, maybe he should hide it somewhere and then let you know. Or he could tell you he found it. Those options won’t do.

You made it clear that you did not want him to contact you. 

Right now. 

And to be honest, these options came into his mind when he was alone. Not at work. Not when he’s with his kids. These thoughts swirled usually late at night when he can’t sleep.

Taehyung peeks at the clock. It’s 8:42a.m. The restaurant is closed. The kids are at school. He just got back from his condo after doing drop-off.

Are you home? He wonders. He’s been wondering that since he became enamored by you. 

Thinking back about your schedule before the distancing, he remembers meeting you during your lunch breaks on Mondays. Those were the days that you worked from home. You haven’t worked from home in over a week.  

Or so he thinks.

He needs something to signal besides your blinds and guardsman lamp to let him know you were inside. So a few days ago he moved the Fuck Off mat. Not by a lot, but just enough so one corner of it pressed against the door.

That if you opened it or if anyone did, the mat would lay flat on the ground. He left the corner was still pressed to the door.

With all these ideas swirling around his head, he finally decides that he should check inside your place. There had to be a reason he found the key.

What if you were hurt? 

What if something nefarious has happened to you?

Yes, you could be there. 

Well and alive. He could scare you. Anger you. But it was worth the risk to calm his nerves about your well-being.

And if you were there, if Taehyung did scare you, he would explain that he was worried about you. About how he found the key. He would continue being truthful. Always.

Taehyung moves quickly, approaching your door and heaving a long sigh as his knuckle raps twice. He pauses. There’s no response. He even presses his ear against the wood of the door. It’s chilly on his skin. He counts to five and doesn’t hear a thing on the side. 

His eyes map the corridor as his hand lines the key with the lock, turning and then rotating the knob to push the door open gently. The actions felt familiar and easy. 

Nonetheless, adrenaline was zipping through his veins and his heart was pounding against his chest. 

Once squeezed inside, he's closing the door stealthily behind him. Footsteps are soft and precise. 

“Y/N,” Taehyung winces at the sound of his own voice. He sounds small. He sounds frightened.

His feet take him to the living room, the space dimly lit by the taunting lamp. He stays on course for the hallway.

Once there, his fingers trace the paint of the wall. His eyes replay him fucking you right here on this floor. The wood. 

Made you cum all over it. He remembers seeing his cum threatening to spill out of your cunt as you recovered from the wood burns that marked up your shoulders and back from his rough gyrations. 

Fuck. He’s getting hard. 

Taehyung needs to stop. He can’t go into your room. Not yet. 

His feet are back peddling. Something is off here. In your place. The smell of it isn’t quite right.

It doesn’t take long before he’s following his nose to your kitchen. His chef nose picks up that whatever is smelling bad in here, is most likely in your refrigerator.

Taehyung does not waste time tugging on the fridge doors. Everything looks okay but something is definitely off. He shuffles through the jars and containers that sit on your shelves. They look fine, but he’s still going to take a moment to sniff each one.

Those are not the culprits. He’s pulling on a drawer. It holds butter, cheeses and dairy. He then closes it. It’s not dairy related. The smell. 

There’s another bin to be opened. There it is. Mushrooms. He can smell them before he sees them. At the back left corner sits a liquefied, bogged bag of murkiness. The appearance alone is ominous. And he’s right for his assumption because when he disrupts its balanced ecosystem the smell from the bag only grows twice as strong.

Taehyung is cringing as his fingers deftly pick up the bag. His other hand comes to help, collecting any toxic drops that were threatening the floors below. The less mess the better. 

Oh here’s another culprit. The trash. It hasn’t been emptied…in what over week?

For fucks sake. 

There’s a disgusting scent wafting up from the bottom and it mixes with the rancid smell of the mushrooms. 

He’s gagging.

You better be glad that he loves you.

Yanking up the plastic bag and bringing it over to the refrigerator. Taehyung is going through it. He has too. 

Touching your things feels good. There's balance in the world.

He knows that everything in this place has your imprint on it. Feels like he’s with you as he handles your knick knacks and takes closer looks at photos and art hung on the wall. 

His curiosity has unfurled and he’s walking bravely around your place, on the lookout for anything that looks like trash. He tosses a package of cookies that are laying on your coffee table. He’ll buy you a new pack. If you need them.

The bathroom trash wasn't full, he'll take it anyway. There are tampons and pads wrapped in the trash. If they’re here now, it’s very possible that you were on your period around the time you asked for space.

He’ll calculate that later, but for now, he questions if your bleeding was the catalyst for asking for space.

Also, why do you have so many earrings? 

They look beautiful on you, but they’re all over the place. 

Taehyung found some on your bathroom counter and some on your nightstand, yet you had a whole jewelry drawer on your dresser. The drawer must be nothing but decoration for you because you placed earrings next to the box. 

You procrastinate.

But that’s okay. He doesn't. 

Taehyung likes to get things done. 

So he will put them away for you and by the time he was done the box was filled with earrings.

[Song suggestion: Dream Girl by Crisaunt]

He also gathered your mail that was strewn around the condo and tucked them on your kitchen island counter. 

Oh and he wiped them too. Your counters. 

When he was finished, he was thoroughly sated. He was covered with a light sheen of sweat by the time he came back from taking out your trash.

But he feels good. Feels proud. Your space looks neater and it was because of him. 

He knows that.

Taehyung just needs this. Just needs to linger a moment longer. Your couch looks so comfy. He straightened all the pillows, folded the blanket that was crushed and buried amongst them.

After removing his slippers. Taehyung gives himself permission. 

He allows himself to fall face down onto your couch. 

And fucking shit. Taehyung should’ve done this when he first stepped inside your place. It smells the most like you besides your panties. He was proud of himself. He didn’t go through your drawers or your hamper.

Yes there’s that ‘Her’ candle that’s currently sitting on his kitchen counter. But now that his face is smushed into the cushion. He’s sure that candle has nothing on you. It’s the fakest representation of your scent.

It’s soft too and warm. Almost like you but not.

Taeyung had you pressed down on this couch before. Ate between your legs as you read that stupid wizard book. You told him it turned you on that he was licking a nerd’s pussy. If you’re a nerd, he’s a geek.

His cock is growing hard again. Fuck.

His tongue licks up and swipes at the fabric pressed to his face. The couch may smell like you but it tastes nothing like you. It’s just fuzz, if fuzz was a flavor. All he knows is that it is not divine. 

Why did he have to think about eating your pussy? 

Because now that he’s thought about it while being surrounded in your essence, Taehyung is all the way hard. He gasps as his head turns to the side, like he’s swimming so he can finally exhale. 

And catch his breath. 

His eyes settle on a photo of you with those two lady friends. But his eyes are pulled to your tits, how low your shirt hangs down. God, your fucking tits….he loves sucking on them, biting on them. 

Fucking them.

And now he can’t stop his hips from grinding his dick into the couch. But not directly.  His cock is rubbing against his boxers, against chinos, against the fucking soft couch. 

It frustrates him.

Taehyung bucks as he brings his hand to the waistband of the pants. Lets his hips rutting to help his hand yank his pants down and his cock free. It's stroking against the soft warm fabric. 

It’s not you. 

But it smells like you. Your body has warmed it up. He’s warmed you up. And it’s warm now. 

Just like you. Only in these ways does the couch remind him of you. 

And nothing else.

Fuck, his pre-cum is weeping onto your couch. 

He cannot stop. 

His sweetness is covering the fabric and only made his glide against it better.

Oh shit, his cock is wedged tightly between his stomach and the warm, wet fabric that’s been under you. And now he’s on top of it. 

So bad. Wants to fuck you, fuck you so bad, on this couch, like he fucked you in the hallway.

A grunt rips out of his throat when he thinks about humping you on your floor. 

How you were so fucking quiet for him although your body broke and shattered around his cock. 

“Nngh.” 

His ear picks up on the desperation lacing his voice. 

Taehyung’s nose is buried in the couch fabric while one hand clenches a pillow and the other is keeping his pants from slipping back over the curve of his ass. The buckle of his belt is pressed above his balls and the sensation makes him dig his toes into the armrest so tight that he’s beginning to get cramps in his thighs.

But Taehyung definitely cannot stop. 

He’s so fucking close to cumming. 

Taehyung’s balls have been filled for days. Heavy with his pain. Loaded with his hurt. He needs this free release. 

He needs to cum.

And so he’s bucking harder. 

His dick is tracing wet patterns up the fabric and back down again. A pool of his precum slicks him up. He thinks about shoving himself into your pussy. Hearing you scream for him. Say his name.

If you were here now, Taehyung wouldn’t tell you to shut up.

He’d let you scream like you were being murdered by his dick. 

You wanted that? Needed that? Didn't you?

His toes are curling and his stomach tightens as his orgasm launches up from his balls. The sensation making him feel like he’s right back and buried in your sweet fucking pussy. 

All the muscles are fired up and loaded for the snap of his orgasm. 

A mangled groan comes from his mouth and he bites down on the pillow his face is smashed against as his body jerks once and he’s cumming. 

God he wished it were you. You that he was pumping into. 

Taehyung's dick continues to pour out its mess onto your couch. And his muscles spasm as the blood from his dick begins to flow back to other parts of his body. 

Fuck. 

He wished he had just unloaded into your warmth. 

Taehyung’s eyes blink open slowly. He wished it was you under him so fucking bad.

His face is wet again. And it’s only getting wetter. Tears pool on the pillow beneath him and then he hears it. The sobs coming from his throat. 

He sounds sad. 

Taehyung sits up carefully as his now unclenched hand rubs the spill of tears on his face and the snot bubbles from his nose. His other hand assists so he can push back and sit on his knees.

Fuck. He made a mess. 

His eyes review the damage. 

Translucent globs clung to the sofa in streaks that were sure to be noticeable once dried. And shit. There’s some on the pillows too. 

Fuck. What is he doing? What has he done?

How could he clean up, only to make a bigger fucking mess? A mess trickier to explain than cleaning up your place.

Taehyung is sniffling as he pulls up his pants and buttons them. 

“I can fix this,” he whispers to himself as his eyes search your place and runs a hand through his damp hair.

He walks to the kitchen, careful to avoid the mirror by your front door as he grabs a dish towel, adds soap and runs it under the water until it turns hot. 

He’s still crying as he scrubs his semen from your couch. He can’t stop the flow of tears that streak down his face while his nose keeps dripping. 

What is wrong with him?

Fuck. He came so big. 

The towel dabs and wipes at the pillows. Working circular motions, hoping that the stain will come out. 

Taehyung is gonna leave as soon as it's all clean. If it doesn’t wipe clean, he’ll flip the pillows and hope the stains will just become a mystery.

He tilts his wrist and looks at the watch buckled fastly there. There’s about an hour before he meets the kids at the bus stop. 

Taehyung is okay.

Everything is okay. No one will know.

And everything will be fine.

[Song suggestion: Speaking Gently by BADBADNOTGOOD] 

Dr. Park Jimin is quiet as he enters. He’s wearing a gold sweater and black pants. There’s no dark leather loafers today, only black boots.

The doctor moves like a dancer. His movements are graceful and purposeful. He switches on the tape recorder without warning and places it on the small table beside him.

He then leans back into his chair and presses his fingertips together. And then nods toward Taehyung. 

“Hello, Mr. Kim.”

“Well, you look mad,” Taehyung huffs as he stares at the doctor, picking up a hint of disdain rolling off him.

And it’s true. 

This version of the doctor differed from the other times. His disposition in the past was like the sweater he was wearing, cheery. The energy radiated, but today was something else entirely.

“I’m not mad Mr. Kim. Why would I be angry?”

Taehyung crosses one leg over the other, the one on top’s foot is shimmying chaotically. 

“I don’t know,” he gestures, reeling one hand into the air. 

“I left abruptly last time. Didn’t finish our session.”

The doctor provides a half-smile as his hands lower and rest palm down on the leather armrests. 

“That’s true. You did leave in a hurry the last time we met.”

Taehyung nods, then licks his lips.

“Yes, exactly. And why you may look mad to me.”

It's quiet and the doctor regards him carefully. 

"Mr. Kim. I am not mad. I am just, curious."

His wiggling foot stops. “Curious about what?”

“What brought you in today? Why are you here?” 

Jimin’s grin gets wider and for some reason it appears eerie to him. Makes him look like that clown in that movie that eats kids.

Taehyung doesn’t know what to say. Why was he sitting here?

“How’s everything with you and Y/N?” Jimin further presses. 

They sit quietly again for a moment, Taehyung’s foot jerking on the floor the only sound.

He was here because he needed to talk about you. Talk about what happened.

“I’m here because I think you were right,” Taehyung admits, pulling his eyes off of the rug to find the doctors’. 

“I should have given her space like you suggested.”

Dr. Park is nodding at him, his smile softening. “Tell me what happened, Taehyung.”

And so he does.

[Song suggestion: La ritournelle by Sebastien Tellier] 

Taehyung steps out his black jeep and eyes the house he once used to call his home.

A single ranch style home, with off white bricks trimmed with a warm tan paint. It looks a little different than the last time he was here. 

There's more shrubs planted along the beds that edge the front of the house. And the lawn is manicured nicely, better than he could keep it in the last few years he resided in the home.

The decision for Sunmi to stay in the house was a straightforward one.

Even though she betrayed him by offering her body to other men while married, it made sense for her to stay there with the kids. 

The more things stayed the same for his babies, the better. 

It was still fucking tough. 

He hasn't been here since he left. Had to take multiple trips to take his shit, loading up his jeep and hauling it to a condo closer to his restaurant over and over again.

Sunmi wanted no part of the restaurant. All she wanted was the kids' stake in the restaurant which he provided since its inception. Besides the money she earned with her regional manager position at a luxury big hotel chain was lucrative.

The screams of kids fill his ears as he walks the pebbled pathway to the door. Giant red and blue rubber-filled helium balloons almost slap him in his face as he goes to knock on the door. 

It feels weird to knock on the door that he used to be able to come and go freely through. But not today. Not anymore. So Taehyung knocks like the visitor he is.

Jackson answers the door. Fuck the handsome and tall bastard. 

"Hey Taehyung," the chiseled asshole smiles and opens the door wider. 

Jackson is wearing a black sweater and matching black jeans. 

"Come on in, the kids were just about to settle down for the movie."

The movie was a Marvel one.

Taehyung's, young friend Jungkook introduced them to the franchise and they went balls to the walls with their interest in that universe.

"Nice." Taehyung feigns as he steps gingerly across the threshold.

The place looks the same. It also looks different.

New pictures hang on the wall. There's one of Sunmi and Jackson. Looks like their engagement photo.

 She told Taehyung that Jackson asked her a few months ago for her hand in marriage and she said yes.

But she also promised there was no rush for a wedding ceremony. It was just an announcement of their commitment to one another.

Commitment.

Taehyung almost laughed when she said the word. But he didn't. He nodded and offered his congratulations out loud to her while offering his condolences to Jackson in his head. 

Jackson was full of life. Hopefully Sunmi wouldn't squeeze every ounce of it from Jackson and invest it in someone new. 

Like she had done to Taehyung.

"Good to see you man," Jackson offers as he slaps Taehyung on the back. 

Jackson's hand tightens on his shoulder as Taehyung stares at the pictures adorned on the entryway wall.

Why was the fucker so strong for?

Taehyung winces under his grip and turns to the sucker, but doesn't miss a family photo he's featured in and still on display. All five of them of the original gang: Sunmi, Chet, Nat, Ella and him, are huddled together in front of an amusement park sign. 

It was taken a few months at a water park before things fell apart. The trip was not his favorite. Him and Sunmi bickered the whole time the kids weren’t paying attention and he remembers she left to go to the bar and drink without him.

Not only does the photo make him mad and sad. It mocks him.

The saccharine inducing picture reminds him of what he once had and what he will never have again with Sunmi.

Just another chapter closed in his book.

His scowl is replaced by a smile as Ella screams for him loudly and runs straight to him, causing Jackson to loosen his hold on Taehyung's shoulder.

"Daddy!" 

His princess is almost to his legs before he snatches her up in his arms and pulls her to him so he can plant kisses on her still chubby cheeks.

Just a few more years and they most likely won't be so round. Growing up does that - takes away the cute chubbies from bodies.

Ella accepts his kisses with giggles and he instantly feels warmer than he felt seconds ago.

"Hey, princess." 

Taehyung's arms tighten and he nuzzles his forehead against hers.

"Daddy, remember I told you my room has changed?” 

She squishes his cheeks and he feels his lips pucker together like a blowfish.

“Come. Come and see," Ella urges as she fights to be released from his embrace.

Jackson has disappeared. 

Good. 

Nat and Chet are huddled with their friends. He’ll talk to them later. It’s best to enjoy their friend's company for now. It was their day after all.

He slides his daughter down so her toes meet the floor and the minute they do, she's gripping his hand and tugging him down the hallway that was once familiar but now is strange. 

Taehyung keeps his eyes on the floor as they walk. It's the only thing that hasn't changed in this place.

He is somewhat regretting agreeing to come to the party. 

Sunmi told him he was invited but understood if he had his own plans for the twins' birthday, he did not.

He had been in such a funk lately he almost forgot his own birthday was in a few days let alone Christmas.

Ella has stopped in front of her closed bedroom door. The black and white polka dot sign that spells her name, painted by him when she was still in Sunmi's tummy, remains on the door.

"Ta-da," Ella says with elegant flourish. Spinning on her tippy toes as she makes her way inside. 

And the room is beautiful. Exactly made for a princess unlike what he had to offer at his condo. 

He hoped to move into an actual house soon. His savings were beginning to show that all could be possible in the next few months. But with you now in the equation, he didn't know how soon that would be.

The walls of the room were painted a blush pink and twinkly lights hung like curtains over her full size bed. The full size bed has a frilly pink and white blanket on it with hearts, but only a little bit of it could be seen because it was filled with stuffed animals, Mazzy holding center stage.

Taehyung's throat closes up. He had just finished painting Ella's room when he discovered Sunmi was cheating. The room remodel was supposed to be a Daddy and Daughter thing. 

It didn't end up that way.

"Do you like it daddy? Mr. Jackson hung up the lights. And see this?"

His kids insisted on adding the mister in front of Jackson’s name even though he said it wasn’t necessary.  “He’s nice and everything's dad, but he’s not you,” Nat had disclosed one visit after the male had moved in weeks prior.

Ella’s running over to the corner of her room where pale lavender lace curtains drape from the ceiling.

"This," she begins, getting on her knees and encouraging him to do the same before she slips under the gauzy material fabric. 

"This is my reading nook."

Inside is a large fuzzy round hot pink cushioned pillow and white fairy lights greet him inside as well. 

"See this?" Ella's hand is slapping against the top of a cardboard box.

"Chet and Nat made this. See? There's the weird dinosaur Chet likes to draw."

Taehyung leans in closer and sure enough there is a googly-eyed green dinosaur with sharp teeth drawn and colored that matches his treasure custom made sharpie.

Inside the box were about a dozen books, a gang of markers and a few stickers.

"This is the box of books I need to read before the end of the school year is over. Chet and Nat have a box too. Once we read all of them, mommy and Mr. Jackson will take us to Playland this summer."

Taehyung oohs and ahhs in response. Amping up his enthusiasm for Ella’s princess room as much as he could muster.

The universe is really dealing him a heavy hand lately because not only did he most possibly lose you, now he's sitting in a house that once belonged to him. With another man at the helm at the stern of the family he helped create. Who helped finish a room for his daughter that he originally began.

After the tour of the room concludes, he lets his princess take his hand and lead him to where everyone is gathered in celebration.

The party is great. It truly is. 

It has all the things kids expect from a birthday gathering: food, games, well, entertainment in general, and the last one is crucial.

Sugar. 

And it’s clear to him that Sunmi and Jackson have pulled together such an event together flawlessly. 

 A projection screen played the latest Marvel release while fresh popped popcorn was scattered around the bamboo floors. The kids’ overdose on sugar and fatty foods were evident in the way they ran and smacked at each other with the items in their goody bags.

The best part of the whole party was that his sons looked happy. 

After the party, Taehyung offers to help get the kids ready for bed as Jackson and Sunmi tidy up the last remnants of festivity. 

He is grateful to assist his children getting ready for bed. Grateful that Sunmi gifts him the opportunity to spend private time with his children on their special day.

Once teeth were brushed and faces washed, the quadruple gathers in the twins’ room and whisper about their favorite parts of the party. 

For Chet, it was the double layer cake that had chocolate fudge on the bottom and strawberry cake on top. He had two slices. And now, a bit of a tummy ache. 

Taehyung rubs Chet’s stomach and kisses his cheek and tells him he will the get boy water soon.

Nat’s favorite part was opening the presents. Taehyung got the Nerf gun that he had been begging for all year. Finally.

Taehyung rolls his eyes at this and then ruffles Nat's hair with his fingers. “Always so savage,” he hums. He then tugs at Nat’s tresses causing the boy to guffaw, “Every day, all day, dad.”

And Ella’s? Ella’s favorite part of the day was that mommy and daddy were back in the same house. 

“It was nice having you both here again,” she says softly and she pokes his cheek with her fingers.

He painted a smile across his face, kissed her on the cheek and told her his favorite part was similar. 

But it wasn't about the house, or being with Sunmi. It was about being with them. His kids. That in fact, being with them was his most favorite thing about the whole week.

They all did a group hug, all coming together and squeezing tight. And as the kids erupt in squeals as they try to tickle under each other’s arms, Taehyung swallows down more tears. 

You’ve wrecked him. He’s broken.

He has been through alot in the last three years, but you removing yourself from his life has opened a whole jar of misery for his soul. Everything seemed to hit his feelings harder than they ever had before.

Taehyung tucks them all in and exchanges a few words of humor and lots of words of love. When he exits Ella’s room and enters the living space, he sees Jackson and Sunmi talking intimately next to the kitchen table.

Their pair of eyes land on him. 

“You both threw an amazing party. Thanks for having me,” he calls out as he waves and heads toward the front door, shrugging on his puffy winter coat he had shed hours ago once he gets there. 

[Song suggestion: What I am by Edie Brickwell and the Bohemian]

The sound of shoes shuffling behind him, causes him to pause at the front door. 

“Taehyung?”

He’s spinning at Sunmi’s call of his name. And for the first time in a long time her eyes on him are kind.

And even better yet, she provides a smile he forgot she had.

“Please stay for a drink?”

He hesitates, but Sunmi continues. “Just you and me. We should talk. Clear the air.”

Taehyung is wary these days. The divorce process wasn't a tedious thing, it was not amicable, but it was almost amicable. 

Kim Namjoon had extended his lawyer services and Taehyung took him up on his offer.

Jackson walks in, hands stuffed in pockets. "Yeah, you two should talk. I'm gonna check on the kids and then head to bed."

"Good to see you Taehyung," Jackson says as he saunters up and proffers a hand.

"Good to see you too, Jackson."

They shake and stare at each other. It's not tense. Just a understanding is passed.

“Don’t stay up too late, love. We have to get up early.” He places a kiss on Sunmi's cheek and she leans in naturally.

"Get home safe, man." Jackson regards him again with a smile and a wave. And then takes his leave quietly.

Taehyung nods and sees Sunmi regarding them carefully.

There’s a nagging thought this may not be the best thing to do tonight. But fuck it. He needs a drink. Just one.

Sunmi’s steps were sure as she saunters back to the kitchen once Jackson heads down the back hallway. 

Taehyung follows close behind her. She always had one hell of a walk, shoulders back, head held high and just a little accent to her hip sway.

“What’s your poison tonight? Wait, don't tell me. Macallan?” 

Sunmi busies herself with filling glasses with ice from the ice maker built in the refrigerator. That’s definitely new. The one that used to be here was outdated and did not have an automatic ice maker. They had to fill up ice trays which at some point became a point of contention in their marriage in the hotter months.

Taehyung acknowledges her and tugs his coat off, throwing it over the back of another chair and then rolling up his sleeves as he takes a seat in the gray sleek chairs.

He can’t help but watch Sunmi. She’s alluring. Sunmi has always been beautiful. Still is. But he can’t help but compare her to you. 

Yes, she’s beautiful. But she’s not you. You hum when you pour drinks, Sunmi is stoic as she pours the brown liquid.

She’s sliding a whiskey in front of him and then settles across from him. Gin. That’s what Sunmi likes to drink. On the rocks. 

The first sips shared between them are tentative and the first words uttered thereafter were forced. 

The dull chatter ranged from “How are you doing?” to “How are your parents doing?” 

But then softened when conversation turned toward the kids and how they were doing in school. And they snickered and laughed at all the gossip occurring in the neighborhood. Who was sleeping with who and who was almost in financial ruin made Taehyung feel a bit better about his circumstances. 

When the benign chatter well ran dry and their drinks were nearly consumed, Taehyung finds himself thinking about you and checks his watch. 

Maybe you would be home when he gets back? 

Maybe tonight will be the night you return to your home?

“So, who is the Donut Lady, Taehyung?” Sunmi asks as she rotates the crystal tumbler in her hand before she takes a neat sip of her drink. Her alcohol-induced glittery eyes are fixed on him. 

She had an uncanny way of picking up on the things on his mind.

But fuck. Ella has been talking. She’s the only one who repeatedly calls you, Donut Lady.

Hell probably all of them were talking about you. How could they not? 

Taehyung finds himself getting mad for even bringing you around his kids. They were fond of you. This could be a huge mistake he made.

“Donut Lady is a woman who occasionally brings me fresh hot baked goods.” he smirks as he takes a drink from his cup.

“Let me guess jelly-filled.” 

“Mmmm, close. Cream,” Taehyung laughs and Sunmi’s giggles soon join with him. 

The banter used to be nice with Sunmi. And then at some point it just got mean. But this right now, right here just felt comfortable. 

For Taehyung, it’s something like another dimension. Or like being Dorothy in Oz. 

Everything seems the same, but in reality everything has changed. Sunmi is familiar and unfamiliar. It messes with his head as he sits here and drinks with her. With every sip he takes of his whiskey.

He’s not proud to admit it but he has routinely called Sunmi out of her name in his head even though she was the mother of his children. A really wonderful mom, actually.

“Tay-ayyyyyye do you like this Donut Lady?” Sunmi is wiggling in her chair as she pins him with the accusation. 

It's endearing and odd. 

“I do.” He sings songs back with a chuckle and then swallows the last remaining drop of his herbaceous amber.

“I know,” she shares as she leans her upper body onto the table.  

“You’ve been looking happier Taehyung. And the kids began to mention a nice woman who brings donuts and hangs out with all of you the weeks they are with you. I don’t think the kids could put the pieces together. But I could.”

Taehyung doesn’t have to look at Sunmi to know she’s smiling. He keeps his gaze to the ice in his glass. That’s how his heart feels. Cold. Talking about you like this is hard.

“Why don’t you bring her around sometime?” 

He looks up at Sunmi. 

“Or to McDonald's, you know? Or I could pick the kids up at your place one Friday. I would like to meet her. See your place.”

“I’m not sure if she will be-”

“Tae.”

“Y/N, she’s diff-”

“Tae.”

His words die on his tongue as she hits him with a look. The look is one of concern.  

“What’s wrong, Taehyung?”

The truth of the matter is he would introduce you to Sunmi. If you were okay with it. If you wanted to be with him. But it's been weeks since he saw you, let alone spoken to you. 

What's he supposed to tell Sunmi? That he followed you? That prior to that he was just watching you from afar?

No.

What he needed was answers. But not about you right now. No he needed to know what the fuck is wrong with him. 

And why do women keep leaving him?

[Song suggestion: Cry Me A River by Julie London]

“Tell me how I fucked up. In our marriage,” he bites out, raking his hand up his forehead to remove the strands over his eyes. His eyes turn toward Sunmi and she takes down the rest of her drink.

“I’ve already told you Taehyung. Us, not working out…I had just as much of a role in it as you. And I handled the-”

“Sunmi, I know what you told me in the past. I've heard it. But let’s drink and talk like friends and not like we were once married. Tell me how I fucked up in our relationship,” he goads, hand cupping and thumping into his chest. 

“Because I really like her. And I want to keep her close. But I don’t think I can do that if I don’t know what made you step out on me? What did I do wrong?”

They stare at one another. His heart is racing and he can see the pulse point in Sunmi's neck thumping. 

“We both need another drink,” Sunmi announces as she kicks back her chair and circles to the kitchen counter for the bottle of gin and whiskey to refresh the drinks.

“If we are going to have this talk Taehyung. It goes both ways. I cheated. That was fucked up of me. It wasn’t right. And I'm sorry."

"But I have my own questions, I would like answered as well. If you're okay with answering them tonight?"

Taehyung nods and licks his lips as she walks back toward him and slides the bottle in front of him.

She nods. He pours. 

“Taehyung. I loved you before you loved me.”

This isn’t news to him. 

It’s something that giggled extensively about when they first began dating and throughout the course of their relationship. They were friends, but Sunmi let him know she was interested in him. He was reluctant. 

Sure, he thought she was pretty, but he really enjoyed her company as his friend. And then things developed slowly between them, one night after a round of drinks. 

Just like this. 

Except then, there were no hurt feelings or bruised egos. Then…there was nothing but hope and a need to be close and then closer. Him and Sunmi were the quintessential slow burn trope couple. But once they sparked, they sizzled and burned fiery red. 

“And I know the twins were an oopsie. They came at the very beginning stages of 'I love yous’ but it wasn't until they were born that I learned what true love looked like on your face.” 

Sunmi's fingers trace the glossy ash table as she makes her way back to her chair.

“What do you mean?” Taehyung can hear the tick of a clock somewhere.

He hates it. The sound muddles with the counting in his head. Throws him off.

“I mean you love our kids. There’s no doubt about that. I look at you with them and I can tell how much they mean to you. It's written all over your face.” 

Sunmi takes a deep breath and finally retakes her seat from across from him.

“And the silly thing about it is, I was beginning to resent how much you loved them. Because I knew you didn't love me even half as much as them.”

“That’s not true Sunmi,” he interrupts, reaching his hand palm up on the table. “I lov-”

Her hand slides lightly into his. The fit is odd. 

How long has it been since her hand in his felt right?

“Yes, you loved me Taehyung. But it wasn’t until I saw you with the boys that I realized I was married to a man whose love shines from every pore of his being. And yet, I had never seen that with you. The way your face lights up when you see them. It never did with me…"

"The thing is, with every child we had together, the more I felt you fell in love with me. That,” her voice cracks as her eyes strain from his and look down at the cup on the table. 

“You loved me more because I am the mother of you children, not because I was the love of your life.” 

He sees a tear run down her cheek. Even though he’s no longer in love with Sunmi, the sight of her getting upset because of how he made her feel fucked with him. 

Maybe he’s not a creep. Maybe he’s just a fucking monster. 

Taehyung spots a box of tissues and offers them to her, which she accepts graciously. He’s not sure what to say. If he should say anything at all.  

Was that it? Was this the reason Sunmi strayed? She didn’t think he loved her? 

"I loved you Sunmi. That's all I know."

She laughs lightly and shakes her head. 

"It's okay Tae. I knew. I knew all along. And I was okay with the way you loved me. If the kids were the reason for me to get a taste of that, I was okay with that. But then…"

"I forgot our ninth anniversary." Sunmi nods solemnly. 

"Oh yes," she murmurs, dragging out the s and looking at the top of her glass as she takes a sip. 

"But that was more like a final straw, Tae. Before that ...the calls… fo you remember…well maybe you don’t but around the time I got pregnant with the twins. You used to call me every day when you were at work. Just to see how I was feeling.” 

Sunmi sighs and leans back into her chair, her eyes fixed on a picture of their kids. The boys are wearing white button up shirts with green bow ties. Ella is wearing an emerald green dress that is too elaborate for a baby and a small tiny white bow in her hair. His princess is draped across her big brothers’ laps and they all look up at the camera. All of their faces are the perfect depiction of their personalities. 

Nat is not smiling. His lips are a tight line across his face. Chet is winking at the camera, one cheek bunched, the smile lopsided. And Ella’s eyes are big and round and her lips make an oval shape. A small bubble of spit sits at the corner of her mouth.

It’s adorable. Taehyung almost forgot about this photo shoot.  He needs a copy of those pictures. But not the one that includes him and Sunmi. Just the ones with the kids in them.

“And then a few years after Ella was born. The little check-ins dwindled to every other day, to once a week and then completely stopped."

“I was opening the restaurant then Sunmi. There was so much work to do. And I wanted - needed to provide for all of us.” Taehyung urges with a hush, his hand squeezing hers again.

Her face is still etched in pain. It makes him sad and angry.

She's right. 

He did let some things slip through the cracks like the daily check ins and the movie nights. But he was busy trying to get permits, gutting the original plan for the kitchen in the restaurant, and creating a menu that would draw customers in.

“I know it wasn’t right, but I was hoping you would stick by me. You knew it was my dream and instead of standing next to me you were fucking other men while I working hard.”

Sunmi scoffs and her gaze meets his again. And this time her stare is hardened and cold. 

“Was it really the restaurant who took all your time or was it just a good reason to avoid me?"

Taehyung regards her and he sees her jaw tighten before she’s bringing her glass to her lips and gulping loudly on what’s left in her glass. 

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, Taehyung. You pretty much ignored me for over a year and half.”

“That’s not tr-”

“It is. It is true. You barely touched me. We had sex like a handful on times during that time. And before you found out about me cheating we barely talked. You don’t remember?”

“I remember you wouldn’t lay off about me getting a vasectomy. That every time I opened my mouth you were telling me you don’t want any more of my babies.” Taehyung spits out as he finishes his drink and tersely plants the tumbler back on the table.

Around the same time of opening the restaurant, Sunmi told him she thought she was done having babies.

Suggested that he could get a vasectomy rather than her getting her tubes tied. That if they changed their mind in the future it would be easier for him to reverse.

Taehyung humored her at first. Telling her maybe. But the truth is, he wanted to have more children. Wanted as many that life could or would bestow on him.

He thought it bought him some time to finish opening the restaurant. But she wouldn’t let up.

A few weeks later Sunmi is asking him again and, then again. Weeks later she’s pressuring him to have a consultation with a doctor. 

And when he refused to go, Sunmi went to the doctor instead and got an IUD implanted. He didn't understand why.

“Why didn't you want any more of my babies?”

He asked the question out loud that he carried around silently for years. Every time he wanted to touch Sunmi, it just felt off. The two of them made beautiful kids. 

She is a great mother. He is a good dad. 

Why didn’t you want any more? 

“It wasn't about not having your babies, Tae. It was just about me focusing on me and what I wanted to do. You had the restaurant.” Her arms fold across her chest and Taehyung feels his eyes roll in his brain.

“Sunmi, you could have always been the general manager at the restaurant. I asked you multiple times.”

“The restaurant was your dream, Tae. Not mine,” she unfolds her arm and leans across the table, picking up the whiskey bottle and pouring more in his glass. 

“You know I always loved working in luxury hotels. I thrive in that environment. I needed something other than just being your wife and their mom,” she huffs pointing to the kids’ portrait hung above his shoulder.

“So how does you getting dicked down by other men help you follow your dream?”

Sunmi stops mid-pour of her drink to look up at him. 

“Tae, I was self-conscious. My body was different from having three babies. And you changed. Changed toward me. And honestly, you were going out with Jungkook and Seokjin every moment you were free instead of me.”

She picks up her glass and take a sip.

“And when I first cheated, the man was giving me attention and I-I was weak. It’s not an excuse, but I thought you were cheating.” 

Her voice is small and delicate. Taehyung watches her throat wobble with a swallow.

That was like a slap in the face. He never cheated on Sunmi. Never. But did he got to the strip club with Seokjin occasionally? Yes.

Was it sometimes easier to go there than to face Sunmi? Yes.

“If I could undo it, Tae. I would,” she sniffs as another tear falls down her face and Taehyung feels his nose running again. 

Goddamn it.

“But even if I did undo it, Tae. I still think we would have ended.” She sighs and looks up at him. 

“Does that even make sense?”

And for Taehyung it did. It made all the sense in the world.

[Song suggestion: Nothing In Return by Monsune]

“Koooookie! Aye, issa me, Chef. Can you pic'me up at tha place that I once call my home, but issnt my home anymore?” Taehyung giggles into the phone.

Taehyung’s sitting on the curb next to his jeep. Sunmi tried to order him a taxi but he refused. Jungkook lived less than five minutes away. 

His friend will help him. Good ol’ Jeon Jungkook. 

“Fuck Chef. You sound so fucking loaded. Wait, did you say you’re at your old home?”

Jungkook sounds funny. His voice went from deep and heavy with sleep to a high pitched whine in seconds. 

Jeon Jungkook, jizz maker extraordinaire, Taehyung thinks and then snickers to himself.

“Chef? You still there?” 

“I did. I am.” Taehyung’s giggling like mad. He’s had four glasses of whiskey. This week sucked, and today took the cock sucker award for sure.

“Fuck, I will be there in ten.” Jungkook says shortly before hanging up.

After hanging up the phone, Taehyung thinks about the last few minutes in his place that he used to call home.

As struggled to put on his coat, with the help of Sunmi he can’t dismiss the way her eyes linger on him or the way her fingers trailed over the fabric.

As he arranged the coat on his shoulders, Taehyung saw Sunmi staring at him.

"Thanks for staying and talking with me Taehyung. It means alot to me."

Her voice was so gentle and the look on her face even softer. 

They were friends first. Taehyung had met Sunmi over a decade ago at culinary school. In the same graduation year.

He had laughed with her before he loved her. And it was good to laugh with her. It had been too long since they had done that. The usual form of communication between them at the end was silence and passive aggressive digs.

But something returned tonight. Or maybe forever. He felt like he was getting his friend back.

"Thank you for having me over Sunmi. You and Jackson did a great job. The kids had a great time."

She nodded and whispered a thank you. 

"Can I hug you?"

He thought they would never touch again let alone hug. It has been too long since they hugged as well.

"Of course."

And then they moved toward one another. Her arms looped around his shoulders and his circled her rib cage. 

The embrace is warm. And it feels the same and different. But not in a bad way. In a way that's comforting and full of grace. 

When they pull apart, Sunmi's hands meet his. "Taehyung just remember we were damn near babies ourselves when we had ours. I don’t regret any of the years I shared with you. I want you to know that.”

“You deserve to be happy Taehyung. And if that’s with Donut lady? I wish you all the best,” she said tugging him in one last time for a hug. 

"At this point, I will take anything." 

“Hey! Fuck face! Get in the car,” Jungkook yells from the driver’s side window as his Steel gray Bronco rolls into the cul-de-sac, music bumping like it’s not…

Taehyung squints his eyes at his watch.

It’s a little after midnight. His friend is pulling through like half the neighborhood is not asleep.

“Kook, you’re such a dickweed. You all alone on a Saturday night?” Taehyung jousts back as Jungkook reaches over the passenger seat to pop the door open for him.

“Saturday nights are for lovers. But I got a fuck scheduled on Sunday, so hurry the fuck in so I can get my beauty sleep,” Jungkook bats his eyelashes as Taehyung stumbles into the car and his butt plunks down on the heated leather seats.

“Pfft, you keep using the same moves to bag women Kook? Make them waffles with a fresh side of jizz?” Taehyung asks as he slams the door shut, narrowly missing the tips of his shoes.

“Oh you’re in rare form tonight Chef. Let’s see what you have to say about me picking you up from your ex's house in the morning shall we?” 

Jungkook laughs as he cuts his eyes at Taehyung before his sous chef is maneuvering the car to his very empty condo.

[Song suggestion: Black Star by Tokyo Black Star]

“So your new strange is also your neighbor?" Jungkook balks.  

The muscle man is dragging his very drunk form to the kitchen table and dumps him into a chair. Taehyung slumps onto the tabletop immediately, palms flat on the table and head on arms.

"Umph,” is the only thing he can reply. 

“You know I like a new strange any chance I get, but strange that lives across the corridor? Absolutely not. When you bring another fuck buddy home, the neighbor strange is going to come knocking on your door asking if she can borrow a jar full of air. And then before you know it the cops are dragging one or both of your sexual partners to jail.”

“I’m not interested in a new fuck buddy right now,” Taehyung sighs as soberness begins to return to him again.

He wasn’t expecting the conversation he had with Sunmi tonight. So much had happened today that exhaustion was settling deeply into his bones. 

Taehyung hasn’t slept well since he last saw you. Getting by with sometimes three, four, maybe five hours a night.

Thinking of you has him getting to his feet and bumbling to blinds hung above his kitchen sink. He leans and yanks a slat down. 

No light shines behind your window. Your place is still as dark as the night sky.

“See? Then there’s that too.”

“What?” 

Taehyung is startled by Jungkook’s close proximity. He turns and his young friend is holding a mug out to him.

“Here’s some water, “ Jungkook proclaims, and watches as Taehyung takes the mug from his grasp.

 Bringing it to his lips, Jungkook takes Taehyung’s sipping occupation as a moment to continue.

“The other thing with fucking your neighbor is you will be checking on each other. At least one of you will. It’s human nature. And when you tell her you’re busy, will she believe you? Suspicion is a human condition.” 

“Look who got more mature over the last few months,” Taehyung scoffs as he takes a big gulp from his cup and watches Jungkook step around him, then peek through the blinds. 

But hold on. The taste on his tongue is not fucking water. He fights to swallow the liquid in his mouth down. 

“What the fuck, Kook? That’s not fucking water.”

Taehyung’s mouth is filled with a bitter, oily saliva. He’s wincing and his stomach is suddenly tossing and turning like he’s on a jerky rollercoaster.

Jungkook chuckles. “I thought you would know me better than that Chef. It's baking soda and water. You can’t be hungover tomorrow. The restaurant has two hundred and ten reservations on the books.”

Taehyung needs to make it the bathroom. Now. He’s racing down his hallway, bare feet slapping against wood floors as he bites back to release of all the food he consumed today back to the outside world. 

As his stomach empties its contents, Taehyung finds himself hunching over the toilet bowl and shuddering violently. 

Between hurls he can feel Jungkook patting his back.

“Chef, don’t be angry. It’s that time of the year to make bank while dealing with assholes who have fat pockets.”

“Besides,” Jungkook’s hand removes from his back.  

“You’d be angrier if you woke up hungover to do all that.” 

Jungkook’s right. He’s done the same to him on many occasions.

Taehyung’s stomach is finally empty and he’s gasping to try and catch his breath. His ass is meeting the floor tiles and he scoots his back to meet the porcelain bathtub. Its coolness seeps under his now drenched sweater. 

He peels open his eyes and Jungkook is leaning on the counter, legs crossed at the knees and his arms folded at the elbow. 

Their eyes meet and the “jizz extraordinaire” is back. Jungkook’s eyes look round, shiny and mischievous. And his lips spread into a lazy, dazzling smile.

“Speaking of hungover. What are your plans for your birthday?”

The holidays come and go. The restaurant was busy, but that’s a good thing. His whole year end top line depended on a solid December revenue. 

And it was better than solid, it was stellar.

As always, Taehyung still made time for his kids, and picked them up on Christmas Day. 

Together they opened presents, made cookies and ate noodles. Then they made a pillow fort in the living room and slept there with a fake fireplace roaring on the large flat screen tv. 

The days rolled on and Taehyung didn’t hear from you. But he couldn’t help it on Christmas Day. He couldn't stay away.  

Before he picked up his kids, he sent you a text. Just wanted you to know that even though you had forgotten about him, he hadn’t forgotten about you. 

Taehyung wished you a Merry Christmas and he told you he loved you, again.

You did not reply.

And now he’s begrudgingly, pulling on a royal blue sweater and some charcoal pants because Thing 1 and Thing 2, Seokjin and Jungkook, have insisted on taking him out for his birthday. 

Insisted that if he didn’t celebrate his  birthday in some big way that he would have terrible sex for the next five years. They reasoned that it was too big of a risk for a man in his situation to be in. 

Taehyung has had amazing sex for years. He was not worried about that. 

No, his concern, especially tonight is what kind of trouble would land in lap because of Seokjin and Jungkook.

To date, they've lost a drunk Jungkook up a tree. Dude was so wasted he decided that he needed to climb a tree in his neighborhood like King Kong climbing the Empire State Building. 

He climbed the tree alright. Climbed it so high that he couldn't get down. Taehyung had to call the fire department to rescue him.

And Seokjin wandered three miles from a bar they were at on foot so he could eat some chicken he was craving. The place closed an hour before he got there. When they found Seokjin he was curled next to their entrance fast asleep.

These two were faster at getting into trouble than his twins when they were in the throws of their torturous threes.

Taehyung doesn't know when terrible twos got a bad rep in the toddler chronicles. The age of three was the absolutely most craze inducing time with all of his kids. 

For him. Hands down. Three-year-olds are the worst.

[Song suggestion: move. by brb]

Taehyung jumps in place at the sudden pounding on his front door. 

Barely, pulling it ajar, Jungkook is crowding his way inside, fitted with a black turtleneck and black slacks. 

And his mentor? Is yodeling at the top of his lungs. Which is making the young one pop and lock as he walks toward his kitchen.

It’s the “Happy Birthday Song” that is bouncing off his walls from his surprisingly in key mentor that Taehyung's sure he’ll hear about from Maya next week at the board meeting.

Seokjin's arms are already out wide as he enters. There's two blunts in his hand.

Oh shit. These two are going to try to get him to outer space tonight.

Taehyung is happy to not be alone on his birthday night. But he is tired. Dinner service had been brutal. 

When they planned this, Seokjin made it seem like just a couple of guys hanging out, getting some drinks.

Jungkook is yanking his cupboard open and sorting through his cup and glasses. 

“Taxi will be here in fifteen minutes. Let’s toast to the birthday asshole before we start out on our fuckery,” Jungkook announces, holding up a bottle of Fireball.

Oh shit. Please drinking angels don’t let me die on my thirtieth birthday, he prays silently.

'Fuck yeah,” His mentor screams midway through the celebratory song, stopping his serenading abruptly.

Taehyung often forgets that Seokjin is older than hell. And sometimes, sometimes he forgets that Seokjin is also older than Jungkook. The man looked like he was aging backward.

He’s wearing a bright white sweater with a huge royal whale on his torse, dark blue jeans sit on his waist. 

Oop. Nope. He’s wearing dad shoes. Adds about four years to his look.

He almost looks his age right now.

Taehyung can’t help but giggle at himself as Seokjin’s chunky white shoes clomp against his wooden floors.

“Get your ass over here and drink!” Jungkook yells, smacking his palm on the counter as he finishes pouring the last shot.

Still laughing, Taehyung make his way to his best friends.

“I’ll make the toast,” Seokjin confides, his smile tamping down to have his lips pressed together somberly. 

Jungkook nods as he passes out the glasses, and then holds his in the air. 

“Taehyung, my dear protégé and dearest friend. We celebrate you tonight. And to do that well we will get your dick wet so you can forget about Sunmi and the neighbor strange across the way."

Taehyung winces. He confided in both men days ago that you asked for space. He didn't detail why and they didn't ask. They both had rolled their eyes and the word, "women," escaped their lips with a sigh.

"So here's to another year of surviving, fucking and living life!"

Seokjin is there clanking his glass to Taehyung's and Jungkook does the same before they kick back their fireballs. 

And before their glasses rest for long on the counter, Jungkook is pouring another round just before they meet the taxi at the sidewalk.

As they squeeze into the back of the cab, Taehyung is feeling warm and giggly.

Seokjin had a dinner reservation at a new hot restaurant named Firewater downtown. 

There seems to be a theme about fires and Taehyung hopes that he doesn't actually see one tonight.

Seokjin had almost burnt down his condo down after deciding to cook a souffle after a night of drinking. Since then drunk cooking has been banned from their friend circle.

Firewater was a late night dining establishment and the atmosphere was amazing. The town was bustling and preparing for new years festivities. And the restaurant was packed with lively people in the mood to celebrate.

Plate after plate of exquisite food landed on their table and by course seven Taehyung was completely and utterly stuffed.

But that's the only civil thing they did because right now. Right now?

Taehyung takes a sip of his drink and a curvy woman wearing leopard print panties is wrapping herself around Jungkook's waist as he sits in his chair.

The young one's face is sweaty and his hair is sticking up all over his head thanks to the stripper running her hands through it repeatedly.

[Song suggestion: Running Away by Vano3000, BADBADNOTGOOD]

"The boy is having the time of his life," Seokjin muses next to him, eyes roving around the dark space punctuated by flashing pink, blue and purple lights.

"He is," Taehyung agrees as he sips on his whiskey. He's tipsy. He's had fun. 

"You're about to have the time of your life, too," Seokjin grins as his eyes look over Taehyung's shoulder.

Taehyung doesn't get a chance to turn before he feels cool fingers at the back of his neck that then slide over to his round of his shoulder.

Looking up, he is met with warm hood lidded brown eyes and glossy pink lips.

"Hi birthday boy. I'm Star. Your birthday gift," the very shapely woman in a dark green sparkly number purrs as she pinches one of his ear lobes with her fingers.

He feels her touch tingle down his spine and he's thinking of you. You make him feel like this all the time.

Taehyung tears his eyes from her figure to look at his friends. Both of them are looking at him and Jungkook nods and smiles, displaying his front teeth cutely.

"Come with me?" Star asks as she holds an open as hand out to him.

His brows know in confusion. "Go asshole. She's the best dancer here and we paid top dollar for a titillating dance," Seokjin complains loudly as his brows waggle suggestively.

Then he's leaning in close. "She's down for whatever. Pointed you out and she said you could 'get it,'" Seokjin hush whispers.

Taehyung doesn't get to answer because Star is now pulling on his wrist and prompting him out of his seat.

He's following her between tables and gawking men and women. The other customers' eyes all flicker to the leggy dancer strutting in front of him.

The woman is built and stacked. Her ass was fat and her hips wide. Taehyung's eyes couldn't stop eating up every inch of flesh revealed.

Taehyung hadn't cum since he was crying in your place. It was like his dick had gone into survival mode. Even his morning wood lasted only for a few seconds before deflating.

But his dick is lightly awakening with every step he takes after her. 

Star exchanges words with a bouncer standing before dark velvet curtains that were closed snugly. The meatball head nods at her and then pulls back one section, allowing her and then Taehyung entry.

The space is sensual, a golden glow washed over the walls, which were covered in black and purple paisley shapes. A sparkly chandelier hangs from the ceiling and black leather chairs and sofas are tucked in the corners.

"Would you like something to drink before we begin, sexy?"

Star's eyes glance at the small bar set to side, being manned by a dude who looks almost as big as the meatball head guy standing on the other side of the curtains.

"Uh, no. Thanks."

Soon she's wrapping her hands around his bicep and tugging him along again. They pass rooms that are occupied, noted by a drawn velvet curtain.

They arrive in an empty room and Star pulls the curtain closed as he steps inside thanks to her head indication.

"Tonight's about your birthday, daddy. Let me take care of you." 

Taehyung wills himself not to roll his eyes as she gently pushes him down into the leather sofa there.

He watches as she pushes a few buttons on a black wall panel, music filling the space and the thumping bass vibrates up his scrotum. And his cock likes it.

Especially likes it because now Star slinking to him. Her toes are pointed and her strides long. 

Her hips roll with the beat and her breasts sway. She nails him with a seductive look as she gets closer to him, her hands slide up her body, her chest juts out to him as they ghost her curves.

Star is making him forget you. He can feel his soul in his body right now and it's literally hell on Earth.

She's making his body feel hot all over. 

He's been in champagne rooms before, this isn't his first strip dance rodeo. But, Star hasn't told him to keep his hand to himself.

No the opposite. She's letting him touch her ass and thighs.

He must've blanked because he doesn't remember when she crawled into his lap and he doesn't remember when her tongue entered his mouth.

"Fuck you're so hot. I can't remember when a really decent guy came in," she huffs into his mouth. 

She grinds into his boner and he grunts against her. "Fuck you even sound good."

Star is standing up and the room is spinning. 

She grabs his hands and puts them on her hips as her satin covered pussy gyrates close and closer to his face, the fabric being pulled low and lower.

Taehyung can see nothing but skin underneath. His stomach jerks at the realization that he's about to see another pussy in the flesh and it doesn't belong to Sunmi or you. 

And when they fall to the ground. Taehyung's stomach falls too. And for the second time of the month he's vomiting. It crept up on him violently.

He missed his chunks getting on her cunt but her legs and toes were not so fortunate.

His seven course meal is all over her.

Star lets out a blood curdling scream  and soon the beefy bartender is taking Taehyung down and hurling him out what he presumes is the back of the club. 

Taehyung's head is soopy but he's not drunk. Star's body was gorgeous. Her natural smell, unfortunately, was not. 

There's all types of reasons a woman can smell off but Taehyung's sensitive nose could not handle what her pussy was emitting.

[Song suggestion: Cool to You by Teenage Priest]

"Broooooo!" Seokjin is turning the corner on the sidewalk with his phone in hand, arms spread wide. Jungkook is a few steps behind him, the hem of his turtleneck pinched between his teeth as he adjusts the belt on his waist.

"You threw up on a stripper's pussy?” Seokjin is cackling as he slaps his back.

"I didn't throw up on her. Just her legs…and feet."

Jungkook's laughing now that he has straightened up his appearance. "Does this trump my jizz bag story?"

Seokjin pauses his laughing to give Jungkook's question great consideration. 

"It's pretty much a tie," Jin decides, bringing his fingers to trace his lips.

"Bullshit, his is worse than my jizz story." Jungkook begins dancing to the songs that play shuffle in his mind's eye. 

They watch him as he shimmies his hips and bounces side to side.

"Bullshit. That wasn't intentional. How was I supposed to know that her pussy was gonna smell…off?"

"True. He didn't know. I should've warned him,"  Seokjin speaks up looking at Jungkook and then Taehyung. 

They all break into laughter, shoulders and hands slapping at each other and Taehyung can feel a new type of tears threaten his eyes.

Wiping at his eyes he sees a taxi idling meters away from them.

"That us?" Taehyung points to the  car.

"Yeah that's us," Seokjin nods, straightening his posture.

"Can I just say for the record?" Jungkook turns back to them as he walks backward toward the cab.

"Taehyung, it may be unintentional. But my jizz bag story only affected my dick getting wet."

They all greet the driver and climb into the car. 

"But your pussy vomit. It kept us all from getting laid." Jungkook closes the taxi door. 

"Friends help friends get laid."

[Song suggestion: Hello? by Clario]

Taehyung is home. He's been home for almost an hour and it's a little after 3am. He should go to sleep.

It's New Year's Eve. They're running a special menu tonight. Lots to do.

But he can't fall asleep. 

The light to your home was on when he got home. He checked again just a few minutes ago. The light was off again.

He's still tipsy. Jungkook and Seokjin insisted they could not end the night with the strip club fail. 

So they went to a bar around the corner and Taehyung walked home once Jungkook found his hook up of the night. 

He’s too drunk to drink straight. Because it almost feels like he’s watching his own body walk across the corridor and slide the key into the lock. 

Turning the knob slowly, he inches the door open and not one light is on when he pokes his head in. It's completely dark. He lets his eyes adjust to the darkness as the door closes behind him with a hush.

Leave the door unlocked, the creep in him whispers. The floor is cold under his feet. 

Fuck, he forgot his slippers.

It's quiet. Really quiet. So quiet that he's scared to move. 

This isn't the first time in your place since he fucked your couch. He has visited a few more times, laying faceup on your bed, staring at the ceiling in the middle of night.

It's his birthday. If you're here. Just looking at you would make it the best birthday ever, he reasons.

That gets him to move, tiptoeing down the hallway until he's outside your bedroom door. 

It's cracked very slightly. 

He gets down quietly on to his knees letting his hands join into the floor. His eyes peek under the door. 

There is no light.

Oh but he can hear something now. It's you. You're snoring. 

Taehyung positions on foot so it plants on the floor. His hand turns the knob, and it moves without sound.

As the door cracks open, the freshness of your scent greets him.  Your smell surrounds him. And he shudders as he attempts to stand fully and nudge the door open.

He can smell you. The room is filled with the freshness of it. 

His eyes adjust to the light and he can see a dark figure laying on your bed. 

Taehyung knows it's you. You're laying on your stomach, one of your legs is hanging out from beneath the covers. Skin from your toes to your hip is on display.

Are you naked under there? 

You have to sleep naked because he finds it hard to believe you were wearing panties at the moment.

His cock is hardening and he grips it tightly to contain the groan that's building in his chest.

Taehyung has missed you.

Knees plant onto the floor carefully and he sees that the sock on your foot is partially off.

The elastic of the ankle is clinging to the ball of your big toe. He lets his fingers tug the loose material and then he's pulling it off slowly, clutching it tightly in his fist.

His nose is close to the sole of your exposed foot.

Not touching, but almost. You smell so good. Even your foot smells better than Star's cunt. 

His cock jerks in his other hand and Taehyung's knuckles get covered with pre-cum.

He would love nothing more than to peel off the covers and bury his head between your ass cheeks. Dig his tongue deep into your tight rim as his fingers stroke in your cunt.

Taehyung's grip around the head of his dick tightens and squeezes. He's trying to control himself but fails with a whimper shaking over his lips.

You're shuffling the tip of your toe flicking across his bottom lip.

He's frozen. 

You're gonna wake up and find him at the end of your bed, kneeling with his hand on his cock.

But you don't. Your soft breathing resumes and Taehyung adrenaline shoots to his dick. You're naked underneath. He can't see your pussy because of the lack of light. But he can see shadows. And all he sees is skin.

He continues pumping himself, his cock keeps growing harder and keeps leaking. His teeth clench to contain his moans and just when he thinks they're about to break, he's stuffing the sock in his fist  into his mouth to release his pleasure filled sounds into. 

Stopping. Doesn't even become an option at this point. 

He's near you. 

His balls are heavy. 

It's his birthday. 

His thoughts jumble as he thinks about crawling over you and sticking his cock right up your ass. 

It's been twenty-one days since he’s last seen you. Last touched you. 

And Taehyung feels exposed and sensitive in your presence. He's spasming at every twist of his wrist. Every touch to his cock.

Beads of sweat, prickle his hair line and and his gut is tightening deliciously. The sock is warm and moist on his tongue and it feels so good to have something of yours in his mouth again.

He can feel the sock dripping and he sucks on it slightly thinking about how yummy you probably taste right now. The thrill of you catching him, worshiping you like this has him tripping over his orgasm.

Do not make a mess again, Taehyung thinks as he tugs the sock from his gritted teeth.

He places the sock over his cock, and the warm damp soggy sock has him cumming as the tip of his tongue licks over the nub of your pinky toe. 

His cum seeps through the sock and his fingers are wet as he pumps to finish, shaking hard as he fights to control the moans clawing at his throat. His other hand reaches the floor and his fingernails grasp the tufts of the rug tightly, a few threads tugging free in his fist.

Taehyung's cock is still dripping as he forces himself to his feet, willing his feet to tread delicately to your bedroom door as he presses the sock harder against his cock. Cleaning up as he moves along.

As he navigates your hallway again, the sock returns to being fisted in his hand and he pulls his pants up as his teeth bite down on his lips. 

He’s a creep. He’s a menace. He’s a monster.

Fast and quiet. His tipsiness must’ve exited his dick through his cum because he feels completely awake as he makes his way to the front door and slides on his slippers. 

Taehyung glances around before he opens your front door. It makes little to no noise to his ears. His fingers flip the lock from the inside before he’s closing it on the outside.

His other hand moves and it’s sticky. Sticky from his spit and cum. He opens his hand and looks at the sloppy sock resting in his hand, and small white lettering calls to him.

He holds it up and stretches the fabric a bit. The sock is gray and has a rain cloud with colorful raindrops falling from it and a zigzag of lightning. And beneath it the words “We are fucked,” is written in script.

And Taehyung couldn’t agree more.

When it came to you, he was completely and utterly fucked.

Next: Six

[sftykth]

Creep - Five ft. KTH (m)

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader

Features: Dr. Park, Jizz extraordinaire Jungkook, Aging backward Seokjin, a soft Yoongi.

Summary: Taehyung and reader have a much needed talk. Things are just too creepy.

Genre: Dilf Tae au, light smut, heavy angst, definitely creepiness and there’s no fluff. just a dad living his life

Word count: 18.8k!

Creep Masterlist

Warnings: Lots of painful conversations. stalking, breaking and entering, masturbation, crying, confessions, jizz bag story, meatheads at a strip club, semen is spread, alcohol, too much drinking, some vaginas smell good, some don’t, readers straight up leaves, breaking an entering, cum om furniture, strippers, exes, face water, birthday shots, vomiting on things, ew, 

A/N: This is a repost. Tumblr ate the OG post.

Have questions to ask the characters? Or want to see what else characters have to say? Click here- characters answer questions or SEND AN ASK! CREEP PLAYLIST

[Song suggestion: Telephones by Vacations]

Taehyung hasn’t slept. Instead of sleeping, he’s been staring at his phone. Well, mainly the clock on the phone. 

And when his eyes weren’t on the digital device they were glancing up to his window blinds to see if your lights would come on. 

They don’t.

He rubs his eyes as he looks at the clock again. It’s almost 5:00am.  

There’s been no movement behind your window. It was about twenty-two minutes ago when he walked into the common area and glanced up at your back balcony window. That lamp that you liked to keep on when you were away was lit. 

There was a time not too long, he awakened in your bed, and then shuffled off to get a glass of water. Shuffling in the dark, hands sliding against the wall, only to eventually stub his pinky toe into the corner of the wall because he couldn’t see shit. All the lights were off in your place.

You told him that you liked to sleep in pitch black when you placed a packed bag of ice on his foot, pointing to the blackout curtains that hang from above your bedroom window.

That light signals that you are not home. That’s what the fucking dumb, holding vigil piece of shit lamp spelled. You're somewhere else at this hour. The hours of fucking and making bad choices. Sometimes the two were one in the same.

Taehyung sulks at his Nespresso machine, debating if he should try to drink the beverage you and Yoongi were obsessed with. There are still several hours left until he’s to meet with you. 

He doesn’t need caffeine, he can push through. 

Taehyung can stay awake. He will head to the kitchen. His eyes pull toward the time, but the one on his stove. Already, his brain is calculating how long he’s been awake. It’s almost been twenty-four hours since Taehyung last slept. 

Waking up to get his kids ready for school at 6:00am. Taking the kids to McDonald’s to exchange them with Sunmi. Dinner service. The bar. You and this fucking Hoseok guy cuddled on the couch like lovers.

That’s what's bothering him. That’s what was keeping him up. You looked beyond comfortable with this guy. 

And Taehyung had been keeping his eye on you for months. Carefully listening against your exterior wall every now and then to see if he could hear you if he could not see you. 

Then once he begins fucking you this guy is texting and calling you. You said he was a friend and then introduced him as a co-worker. 

Why the switch up? 

It all made his brain ache.

Taehyung doesn’t know when he fell asleep all he knows is that he’s now waking up with a crick in his neck. 

The table doesn’t not make a good bed and his arms made terrible pillows. It’s 10:41a.m. his phone notifies him.

He takes his time to stand, all the muscles in his body are screaming in protest. But he needs to get ready. He needs to get ready to see you. His bastard of a dick twitches at the thought. Yet his feet are leading him to his window. 

Your blinds are open. You are home. 

That realization sinks into his pores quickly, causing blood to shoot through his veins and jolt his brain fully awake. He’s moving faster now, reaching into his fridge to grab the container of apple juice.  Seeing there’s only so much, a glass wasn’t needed. He finished off the bottle and tossed into the recycling bin.

With that Taehyung is off to get scrubbed and ready to face you. He tries to steady his breath as the water stream beats the skin on his shoulders. He’s ready to make amends. He knows that he crossed some boundaries with you, but it still didn’t excuse the fact that you keep skirting around what the fuck the two of you were doing. 

After his shower he’s tugging on a brown sweatshirt, olive parachute pants. His long hair won’t obey, so he’s snatching a mustard beanie over his head and shoving his feet into his slippers. He glances at the watch on his wrist.

[Song suggestion: THREE STRIKES by Honne ft. Khalid]

It’s 11:42a.m. Taehyung tries to wait. He reviews the sales for the restaurant. They sold out of last night’s specials. This time of year was a money rake.

11:47a.m.

He tried but he can’t wait anymore. He would rather be early, than on time and even worse, late.

His breath is shallow as he steps into the freshness of the day. It's cold out, the rush of the hot air from his lungs is mixing with the early afternoon chill. Warm misty clouds puff from his mouth and he quickly rubs his hands together before he’s knocking on the door. 

Three solid raps onto the wood with the knuckle of his pointer finger.

The door opens almost immediately.  

You swing it widely, before you’re instantly turning and walking back into your living room. Only your fingertips gracing the edge of door are his greeting.

Taehyung's lips feel dry, so he licks them as he steps inside. He’s closing the door and takes a moment to inspect your place.

It’s dark inside. 

Even though the sun is already high in the sky. Only a little light is coming into the balcony glass door, causing his eyes to struggle to adjust. 

It’s also eerily quiet. 

Every time he has been over, music is either playing from the Bluetooth speaker in your kitchen, the tv was on some Netflix series or your voice is filling the empty spaces of the home.

You’re taking a seat on your couch, the clutter of pillows crowd you easily. The familiar green robe is wrapped half haphazardly around your shoulders.

But you are not bare. Not this time. 

A royal blue jumper sits beneath the luxurious emerald garment and it stops at your mid-thigh.

Taehyung swallows hard as he stalks closer to you. The air feels odd, but his pull to you is still there. It's undeniable. And as he gets closer, you are eyeing him wearily while your hands fist by your side. 

Should he sit beside you? 

Taehyung sees a knitted pouf ottoman nestled between the corner of your couch and the wall. He grabs it, pulling it closer in proximity to you before he sits on his haunches. His gaze is a bit lower than yours. But he doesn’t care. You should always be slightly above him. 

It seems fitting and natural to him.

Your eyes move to the hands which are folded in your lap and they stay there. You look like a beautiful statue.

“Y/N,” Taehyung whispers softly, the sound of your name vibrating in his chest. Feels so good to him.

His fingers reach out and graze the velvet of your calf. The skin rises in response to his caress and your eyes close briefly before fluttering open. You’re still picking up on the messages he’s sending you.

He wants you.

“Tae,” your voice holds a warning and you’re adjusting so your legs fold onto the couch. 

He doesn’t say anything, but then his lip aches. He’s been biting into it hard. Trying his best to let you say what you need to say. 

He’s been waiting all night for you to say something. Anything. 

Spotting one of your blankets, and he tugs it over your thighs. Must keep you warm. It’s cold out.

“We need to talk,” you say matter-of-factly, shoving the offered blanket off of you. 

Taehyung lets out a huge puff of air from his lungs. He feels dizzy for a moment.  The past was suddenly blending with the present.

Your voice almost sounded like Sunmi’s when you said those four words.

“Who is he? Who’s Hoseok?” Taehyung rambles out before letting you begin whatever assault you had planned for him. 

He needs to know who the fuck he really is.

You’re the one sighing now as you are straightening and then leaning further into the back cushions. Fingers gather the edges of your robe and your hands wrap it around your body.

Why are you hiding away from him?

“I will tell you all you want to know. If you promise to tell me everything I want to know,” you say steadily, resting your elbows on your bent knees.

“Whatever you wanna know darling,” he nods, fingers stretching out, the very tips curving along the joint, loving your flesh against his.

Taehyung loves touching you. He needs to touch you.

How is he supposed to be in the same space as you and not be within fingertips reach? He supposes he’ll never know.

You’re nodding. “Okay. Hoseok is my co-worker. And he’s also my ex-fiancé.”

Stop. 

His fingertips come to a complete fucking stop as his brain trips around the new information. 

Part of him wants to react. But who is the fuck is he kidding? He has a whole fucking ex-wife. Not to mention three young kids. 

He’s not going to say anything. He can listen to you. Let you finish. Life fucking happened before him and will continue when you’re with him. 

“Alright,” Taehyung’s fingers are moving again. His middle finger traces a circle on your skin, his eyes focus on the pattern. It soothes him. “Are you sleeping with him?”

Now he’s curious about your eyes right now. They always speak louder than your actual words.

“I hav-”

“Were you with him last night?” Taehyung interrupts. You slide your leg away from his touch. He wasn’t realizing his tracing had become two fingers pinching your flesh.

“Yes, but not like that,” you mutter shakily and there’s something in that tone. Something your mouth isn’t saying but your eyes are.

Taehyung’s processing the information you just gave him when you’re suddenly asking him a question.

[Song suggestion: YKWIM by Yot Club]

“Is this yours?” You are holding out an arm to him, palm flat and open. In the center of your hand is the AirTag with a heart on it.

The world is spinning again. And he blinks several times to clear his vision. And when it does clear, you're looking at him. 

And for the first time he realizes that it looks like you’ve been crying.

He’s nodding and then he’s doing his best to explain. Because your eyes are watering. And he doesn’t want them to reveal what they’re holding. 

“I was just worried about you darling. And I bought it for Mazzy, Ella’s lov-”

“Are there more of them in here…the Airtags? On my person?” You interrogate, surveying the room and then pressing your hands to your chest, palms to breasts. 

Taehyung’s reaching up to grab your hands. “There’s nothing else. I promise. I’m sorry,” He rises and presses his lips to yours.

“I forgive you for not telling me about Hoseok. Now, forgive me.” 

“It’s not the same Tae, you tracked me without my consent. You hid it,” you huff and rub your eyes tiredly.

“It’s kind of similar actually. You hid that you've been talking to your ex-fiancé this whole time. You told me he was your co-worker,” Taehyung shrugs.

You study one another. But you let him finally hold your hand. And he’s gets hopeful when you squeeze his fingers.

“I know you’ve been watching me. Tell me for how long. Tell me everything, Tae.” Your thumb caresses the skin on the back of his hand. 

“I didn’-”

“Tae, one of the things I like in a man is honesty. Be honest with me.”

Your voice is featherlight. And he feels so good that you notice that he tries his best to be completely transparent with you. He wishes you would do the same with him. 

All humans have their superpowers. 

His happens to be honesty. 

Just because he didn’t divulge everything to everyone doesn’t mean he was being deceitful. Sure we omitted information, but he rarely lied. 

Rarely.

Besides, Taehyung couldn’t lie to you anyway right now if he wanted to. Your eyes are tugging the truth out of him. His whole aura feels under the influence of you, his judgment is clouded. 

“One hundred and nineteen days. That’s how long I’ve been watching you.”

He sees your eyes dilate for a moment before narrowing at his confession. 

“But not like every day. Just like the first time I saw you in your window and couldn’t stop thinking about you was one hundred and nineteen days ago.” 

Taehyung is panting. His breath coming out hot and fast. He feels better.

Your lips press tight together. And the grip he has on your wrist tightens automatically.

He just needs to keep you with him. 

Needs you to look at him and not get lost in all that he just said. To look at him. To remember that you respond to his touch. To him. 

And you do. You do respond. 

Your eyes widen and your lips part slightly before you nod for him to continue. 

His words were all semantics. What he meant is he was taken by you. He couldn't help but drown you with attention.

Taehyung does continue.

He weaves the story of seeing you the first time as you were sweeping your floor. Regales you of all the information he pumped out of Maya. Told you about Maya telling him all about the fiancé you let go of because you were bored. 

Knew you had a fiancé but he didn’t know the fiancé was THE Hoseok.

As Taehyung continues, he notices you haven’t interrupted him. You haven’t asked one question. You just watch him as he details your habits, your schedules and oh, him jerking off in the common area after seeing you half naked that one evening. 

That’s when you react. Taehyung’s sure he has been rambling for at least an hour. And it was there that you gulp loudly.

It’s time for a break. 

His tongue hurts from the words that have been tumbling out of his freely mouth.

“Let me make you some tea,” he announces, getting up and easily moving to your kitchen. He feels lighter. A lot lighter than he felt two hours ago. 

You’re watching him as he moves to the cupboard that holds your teapot and then the small drawer that the ginger tea you like to sip on is nestled. 

Every movement is accessed by your gaze. Evaluating him. 

After filling up the teapot, he clicks the burner on and then looks over you.

“Are you hungry? Did you eat?” He asks, opening your refrigerator to scope what you had.

A bunch of arugula, mushrooms, butter…

“I’m not hungry, Taehyung.”

That gets his attention. He let’s go of the fridge handle and lets the refrigerator door clap closed. 

What. Are. You. Doing?

Why are you saying his whole fucking name like that?

You have called him Tae. 

Mr. Mom. Your date. Or your neighbor. 

But he can’t recall the last time you referred to him as Taehyung.

“You’re not still upset about the AirTag are you?” Taehyung chastises as he rounds your kitchen counter to move back into the living room, closer to you.

Suddenly, you feel far away. Even though you're steps from him.

Your eyes slide away from him and  over to your glass balcony door. Lips nibbling on a piece of skin chapped there. 

“Taehyung, I just think we need some space.”

“What?” 

He’s rushing to you and you’re cowering away from him. Legs pulled toward your chest and arms wrapped around them.

Panic is etched across your face. 

What has he done? What has he done that has made you look at him like this?

“Are you scared of me? Mad at me? You know I would never hurt you, right?” Taehyung babbles as he nudges the pouf he was sitting on over with the tip of his slipper. Taking its place and floundering to his knees. 

Grateful that the rug is there but damn the hardness of the floor still jolts his system. But that’s fine. He’ll suffer if it keeps you from saying what he thinks you’re trying to say. 

Taehyung is yanking your legs away from your body so he can bury his face between them. His nose skimming at the crux of your thighs. Damn, you smell so good. His tongue traces the seam between your legs and your skin is so smooth.

You’re wiggling away from him and his arms wrap around your waist.

“Don’t do this, darling. I won’t do it again. I will never follow you without your consent again.” He can feel tears swimming behind his eyelids. 

Taehyung does not cry. 

He’s never cried as a man. Crying at his grandparents’ funerals and the birth of his children, doesn’t count. 

Yet here he is, trying his best to swallow his tears. Whimpers are clawing up his throat and he’s biting down hard on his lip to keep them at bay.

Your hands find the top of his head and they pet down until they’re cupping his cheeks. 

“Taehyung. I like you.”

“I love you,” he blurts out, voice shaking with exhaustion. Exhausted from holding all the words as long as he has. 

And now his tears break free, rolling down his face. A few dip into the corner of his lips. The taste of them is salty and pathetic.

“Love?"

"Taehyung, you don’t know me,” you state firmly, big concerned eyes bouncing between his.

“But I do,” his tone is hollow and broken. Every word is a hiccup. He needs to see your face but he can’t  because of the tears pouring out his eyes and down his cheeks.

Why would you need space? You just admitted that you liked him. He’ll tell you everything. Just like you requested when this conversation began.

“You love to eat Milka cookies as a bedtime snack. You love Harry Potter books and you read all of the stories like twice a year. You have an unhealthy relationship with root vegetables. You need an iced vanilla latte all day, everyday. if you can help it. You love to bake and you don’t think I noticed it. But I have. Those donuts, the ones you brought for my kids and saved my ass for breakfast? You made them.”

Taehyung is out of breath and his nose is leaking. One of his hands lets go of your waist so it can wipe at his face. It’s so wet. 

You’re looking at him as you lick your lips. Your eyebrows are knitted together and now your eyes are small, squinting. 

“Taehyung…”

“Don’t Taehyung me. Please don’t. Just keep calling me Tae,” he whines, digging his head back between your legs. 

All Taehyung can hear is his pounding heart and sniffles from his nose.

“Okay, T-tae. It sounds like you do know me,” Taehyung israising his head to look at you again, at the sound of his nickname. 

You’re biting on your thermal painted thumbnail. That's another thing he knows.

You fucking paint your nails almost every other day. 

“But I don’t know anything about you.”

“Yes, you do,” he argues, arms tugging your waist to bring you closer to him. He cranes his neck so your lips are near his. 

“You know I’m Kim Taehyung, owner and head chef of Ella’s, the restaurant named after my princess. You’ve met my kids. You’ve hung out with them. And like you said not too long ago, ‘They’re part of me’. You know me, Y/N,” he whispers, his arms are wrapping tighter around your waist and drawing you closer still. 

His lips dust the skin beneath your jaw while your knees hit his stomach, causing him to grunt lowly. Your legs are pressed tight together. He’s done this many times, pulling you close and your legs would easily spread for him.

But they don't right now.

“Y/N,” he whispers again. His fucking bottom lip is trembling, he can't even kiss you. His teeth work down to get it under control.

“Tae, I don’t even know your birthday or your favorite col-”

“December 30th, twenty-one days away. Forest green and brown are my favorite colors,” he confesses.

You stare at him. And he tugs again and your legs open just a bit. He’s getting closer to his favorite place. 

But Taehyung doesn't mind working for it. You're worth the work.

You were his. He didn’t give a fuck about Hoseok. You weren’t saying that asshole’s name when he had his dick deep in your gut.

Taehyung bends; his hair brushing down your torso as he lands kisses to the tops of your thighs. 

You smell wonderful. You feel divine. 

"I will worship you for countless days and nights on my knees if that's what you wanted. If that would make you stop all this ridiculous talk."

One of his hands slides from your middle and comes to rest above your mound.

You're tensing under him, immediately  and pushing his shoulders back. 

"It's not ridiculous, Tae. I liked you, but you tracked me without my permission. And then you almost got into a fight with Hoseok. I just don't know who you are."

Taehyung is confused. He is scrunching up as you're adjusting and your knees are pushing against his stomach again.

His hand becomes trapped between your thighs. He snatches it out of your warm tight snare and places his shaky palm on the top of your leg. 

"Y/N, I want you to get to know me better. I should've said this weeks ago, but I want to be with you. I don't want you entertaining the company of no-" 

"Tae, I need space. Hoseok wants to work things out and I should've told you that. I-"

"Please don't go back to him. He's already had a chance. Give me one. Give a chance," Taehyung begs, scrambling to wrap his other arm back around you and you're crawling up onto the couch, away from him. 

You stand on the cushions and then step around him, feet meeting the floor.

And now he’s the one crawling, his clothed knees muddle against the rug, making his movements sluggish and jerky.

“What do you need? Whatever you want. I will give it to you,” he sobs as his fingertips struggle to make contact. 

You let him wrap his arms around you. His face slides against your delicately covered stomach. His nose presses against the fabric, your warmth. His tears are staining it. 

“I need you to leave, Tae. I need space," you whisper. He allows you to unwrap his arms from your waist and once free you're stepping back from him. 

Taehyung looks at you and the image breaks his heart. You’re closing the robe tight around you and the sash around it tighter. You're folding into yourself. And your eyes? They avoid his gaze.

And he realizes that anything he says right now, it won’t matter. 

Your mind is made up.

You’re a stubborn woman. You’re a stubborn and messy woman. 

And possibly a woman, who Taehyung just lost a chance with forever.

[Song suggestion: Solitude by Billie Holiday]

Taehyung fucking misses you. It's been seven days since he's heard from you or seen you. 

As requested, he has given you space. Physically. 

But, emotionally? Taehyung has tried. He has had enough. You never specified what space means to you.

All he know is you belong to him. And he loves you. 

These two facts are what has him still trying to reach you through the phone. He texted you every morning and before he fell asleep every night since. 

The texts were casual: 

"Good morning.”

“Good night.”

“Miss you.”

“Love you.”

After every message he sent only made him more irritated at the fact you were using an Android and not an iPhone. 

He didn’t know if you were even reading his texts or not. Every single text felt like sending a heartfelt speck of dust into the universe.

Taehyung only hopes you would at least see his texts and that you haven't blocked him. If you forgive him. He'll see if you're open to getting a new iPhone. 

He'd be more than happy to buy one for you.

And because you didn't respond to his texts, he found himself calling you. When he really missed you. Hearing you on your voicemail made him feel good. 

Taehyung doesn't think the messages made much sense. Mostly he would tell you he was thinking about you. That he missed you. Hope you were well.

One thing he didn't include was asking you to call him back. He didn't want you to feel like he was enclosing on the space you requested.

But your voicemail inbox became full three days ago. So he can't even leave you anymore messages.

But he was tired of text messages. And voicemails. That's not what your needed. Those forms of communication weren't romantic.

You needed romance. Deserved nothing less.

So he bought flowers. The same bouquet as your first official date. Only bigger. And more petals.

He left the them, wrapped in blue tissue paper on your Fuck Off doormat.

It’s now day two and the fucking flowers are pretty much dead. They're not potpourri. 

Not yet. 

But they are withering pathetically on the door mat. 

The whole fucking scene mocks him.

A sunshine face with the words 'fuck off' in conjunction with his piss poor excuse of romance wilting from neglect is poetic justice.

Seems about fucking right.

You deserve romance. And he deserves the pain. It's a learning lesson about how to love you right. The way you want.

Yet Taehyung's blood simmers in his veins when he lets his mind wander to the fact that you aren't and haven't been home.

If he had to guess, he thinks you departed at some point when he left to get his kids from school after your request for “space".

Space. 

How much did you need? 

Taehyung's been holding vigil by his window every chance he gets. That damn light in your back patio window has steady been on even in the daytime.

Did you need so much space that even walls between you and him was not enough?

As he retrieves the dying bouquet, pink and white petals trail behind him as he carries it in his hand back into his place. 

And he thinks what a pity you never got to see this bouquet. If the tiny one he gave you on the date put a smile on your face, surely this bouquet would have a bigger impact.

"That's it," he huffs to himself as he stuffs the flowers into his trash bin. 

Taehyung will have flowers delivered to the place you typically were at this time of day a week or two ago. 

He wants to keep his promise. He will not follow you. 

And he's not going to make direct contact either. This wasn't what he was trying to do with the flowers. 

Taehyung just needs you to remember him.

Remember what the two of you had together.

That he loves you even though you think he doesn't know you. But his heart knows you. It recognized your yours immediately.

He knows you’ve felt what he’s been feeling. You have reacted to every touch he’s given you since day one. 

Now that he thinks about it, you're like an exotic flower. He would like to think that his presence in your life has helped you bloom in some way. 

Taehyung's watched you from afar and he has seen you up close. There was denying that you opened up and brightened when he was around. 

The flower to his sun.

[Song suggestion: Blister In The Sun by Violent Femmes]

Before he knows it he is pulling out his phone and making a few calls.

Taehyung is a man of his word. He felt proud of himself when he ordered the same bouquet but the destination was different. 

And he did not deliver them. He had someone else do that. 

He waited in the parking lot. Across from the delivery address.  Watching if the flowers came back with the deliverer. 

They did not.

“Did you see her?” He asks Yoongi as the raven mullet hair man yanks on his Jeep’s passenger door and settles into the seat next to them. 

Yoongi rakes a hand through his hair and scratches at his scalp a moment before shaking his head. 

“I didn’t man. There was some assistant who said Y/N was in a meeting, but she’ll make sure she gets it.”

Taehyung’s heart lifts with hope. You’re here. He’s closer to you than he’s ever been in a week. 

“Thank you Yoongi,” Taehyung offers before pulling his smaller friend into his chest, arms wrapping around his shoulders.

The addict smells like the drug of his choice. Coffee. The scent is strong and powerful. His body tenses under Taehyung’s hold a moment before melting into it.

“Yeah man. You say you love her. Of course I’ll help you.”

Okay. So maybe Taehyung did not tell Yoongi everything that has transpired. But those were just minor details. Omission not deception.

The foundation. The foundation of it all is that you like him. And Taehyung loves you. 

And there’s a chance that your ‘like’ of him could evolve some day, some hour or some minute into love. The possibility is still there. You haven’t closed the door on that, yet. 

Taehyung continues to embrace his friend a moment more. 

The hugs he needs usually from his kids but he didn't have them this week. He hadn’t hugged anyone except for you and that was several days ago.

“Alright, I usually only accept this type of gratitude after I have my dick sucked.”

Taehyung gasps and pulls away, looking at the other man’s eyes. 

Yoongi's eyes are crescents and smirk lines his lips. “But the only gratitude I will accept today, from you is a fucking espresso.”

"Deal. I’ll grab you one after I pick up the monsters," Taehyung agrees, peels himself from his friend.

“Ugh,” Yoongi groans. “You better be glad that I like your kids or this could be a different story.”

[Song suggestion: Dreams by Night Tapes]

You: Got your flowers Tae. I still need time. Please give that to me.

That’s the text you sent him four hours ago. And you received the flowers six hours before that.

First, space. Now, time.

You asked for some time. Time is temporary.

But still, Taehyung can’t sleep. This doesn't feel like time and space is what you’re asking for. 

It sounds like you are asking for him to erase you from his memory?

How’s he supposed to do that? 

How is he supposed to erase you? 

You’re scratched into his brain. His pulse beats with yours. You are part of him. If he erases you that means he has to cut a part of himself away.

Is that what you want? 

He has to get out of bed. 

No, he needs to get out of this room. It’s too hot. And the walls seem to close around him by the minute.

Taehyung walks into the hallway and pauses. Soft snores and breaths greet his ears and his heartbeat slows a little. He’s tiptoeing to slightly open the door where the soft sounds emanate, pushing it gingerly with his fingertips. 

There's the silky crowns of heads and a few feet dangling over the edge of the beds. Those strands. Those limbs, they belong to him. They are his. He loves them so. 

He needs to smell what belongs to him. 

Taehyung's movements are slow and steady. He moves to Nat on the full-size bed. The boy is sleeping alone. 

He peers down close and examines the small beauty mark that rests on the young one's cheek. It’s one of the things that separates him from his brother. Nat is very proud of his mark.

Placing a small kiss as he sniffs, Taehyung can feel his roiling emotions settling. Decompression occurring. 

And soon, he’s proceeding to the wood bunk bed that sits on the opposite side of the room. It carries the tender bodies of the remaining two who are half him. 

The top bunk is his first stop. The rungs creak under his weight as he ascends but it's not the sound that makes him shake with anxiety.

Ever since Taehyung put the damn thing together, he was worried it was going to collapse. He knew his way around some tools, but assembling the bunk bed felt like piecing Mount Everest together. 

Maybe he should have Yoongi take a look at it next week? His friend is good with his hands.

Ella shuffles under her covers as he leans in close to kiss her cheek. His hand pets the top of her head and she lets out a contented sigh that makes him smile. 

The reveal of a smile is not lost on him. Taehyung hasn’t smiled much in the last week. It felt odd on his face.

By the time he’s given all his kids kisses and nuzzles, he’s creeping back to the hallway. But he doesn’t want to sleep so laying in bed is pointless.

For a moment he finds refuge in the kitchen as he sips water and then eats a banana. But then he’s staring at his closed blinds. And then he’s peeking in between the slats. 

Your light is still off. 

He feels his lips that were resting in a neutral position pull down even further than before. 

Where are you? 

If you’re not home where have you been staying?

Taehyung lights the candle he bought at the jazz in the park with you with a match. Your candle. Her. 

He just wants to smell you. He could grab the panties but that's for emergency circumstances. And if he smelled them, he would end up initiating the saddest jerk off of his life.

He can’t smell them because it will only fuel his desire to close space between you. But his dick only has a small grudge in this battle. It’s his brain and heart who are at war. 

Are you staying with one of your lady friends? Or worse maybe you’ve been with Hoseok this whole time?

“Fuck,” he hisses as the match he used to light the candle stings his hand. 

He’s sucking on the fresh burn on his thumb as he gazes at your door. His eyes wander to the fucking rosemary bush. It looks thirsty as ever.

Taehyung huffs, grabbing his unfinished glass of water, tucking on his slippers and pulling his front door open. He lets the door shut softly before he's marching toward the damn neglected robust plant. It’s grown since he last watered. 

Sun, water, and attention. It’s not that hard.

His fingers press against the spindly branches, making room so he can touch the dirt. It’s bone dry. 

But what's that? 

Taehyung presses again because something feels hard under the pads of his fingertips. 

Maybe it’s a rock?

Pointer finger bulldozes down and wraps around the object before tugging. 

He retrieves it, fingers brushing off the clumps of soil that cling to the surface. 

Again. His hands are shaking, again. 

Is this…

He stares down at the object in his palm. Fingers curling around the edges, and the metal teeth bite into his skin.

It’s real. 

But is it what he thinks it is?

Taehyung’s free sweaty palm wipes down his flannel pants as he looks up and then down the corridor. No one is here. 

It’s late. Put it back. 

But what if?

What if it does go to your door? Should he just leave it in a rather obvious place? That’s not safe.

First, just check to see if it fits. 

“If it doesn’t fit. I’ll put it back,” Taehyung mutters to himself as he gets closer to your door.

Positioning the weathered key, his hand wobbles as he takes a deep breath and then slides it into the lock. It replies with a gentle click. And when he turns the knob, it moves easily. 

His mouth is open. It is. 

Did you leave this for him? Did you?

The door opens slightly and he’s shutting it quickly. Breathing ragged again. 

He can’t do this. 

What is he doing? Was he going to go inside? 

He can’t do that. Can he?

Taehyung’s turning the key in the opposite direction and then twisting the knob. It’s met with resistance. The door is locked. 

He’s done nothing wrong. He only tested the key. 

But he can’t put the key back. It’s unsafe to do so. It’s unsafe for just anyone to stumble upon the gatekeeper to your home.

He’ll keep it safe, he thinks as the key slides into his pocket. As he makes his way back into his condo, he’s suddenly feeling tired, very tired. 

Slowly he walks to the lit candle in front of his window, blows it out and then closes his blinds. 

He will think of what to do with the key, but for now he needs rest. And on the way to his bed, the key sits warmly against his thigh and the feeling soothes him.

 [Song suggestion: How was Your Day? by beabadoobee]

The feeling of comfort from the key is fleeting though. 

Because once Monday morning arrives, Taehyung's kids are off to school and the key is weighing in his pocket like a stone. 

Taehyung carried it everyday. It felt like you were there with him as he moved throughout his days.

He couldn’t think of what to do with the key. It’s not that he couldn’t think of a thing to do. 

It was the opposite. He had too many options of what to do with it.

He argued with himself to put it back in the pot. 

But then again, maybe he should hide it somewhere and then let you know. Or he could tell you he found it. Those options won’t do.

You made it clear that you did not want him to contact you. 

Right now. 

And to be honest, these options came into his mind when he was alone. Not at work. Not when he’s with his kids. These thoughts swirled usually late at night when he can’t sleep.

Taehyung peeks at the clock. It’s 8:42a.m. The restaurant is closed. The kids are at school. He just got back from his condo after doing drop-off.

Are you home? He wonders. He’s been wondering that since he became enamored by you. 

Thinking back about your schedule before the distancing, he remembers meeting you during your lunch breaks on Mondays. Those were the days that you worked from home. You haven’t worked from home in over a week.  

Or so he thinks.

He needs something to signal besides your blinds and guardsman lamp to let him know you were inside. So a few days ago he moved the Fuck Off mat. Not by a lot, but just enough so one corner of it pressed against the door.

That if you opened it or if anyone did, the mat would lay flat on the ground. He left the corner was still pressed to the door.

With all these ideas swirling around his head, he finally decides that he should check inside your place. There had to be a reason he found the key.

What if you were hurt? 

What if something nefarious has happened to you?

Yes, you could be there. 

Well and alive. He could scare you. Anger you. But it was worth the risk to calm his nerves about your well-being.

And if you were there, if Taehyung did scare you, he would explain that he was worried about you. About how he found the key. He would continue being truthful. Always.

Taehyung moves quickly, approaching your door and heaving a long sigh as his knuckle raps twice. He pauses. There’s no response. He even presses his ear against the wood of the door. It’s chilly on his skin. He counts to five and doesn’t hear a thing on the side. 

His eyes map the corridor as his hand lines the key with the lock, turning and then rotating the knob to push the door open gently. The actions felt familiar and easy. 

Nonetheless, adrenaline was zipping through his veins and his heart was pounding against his chest. 

Once squeezed inside, he's closing the door stealthily behind him. Footsteps are soft and precise. 

“Y/N,” Taehyung winces at the sound of his own voice. He sounds small. He sounds frightened.

His feet take him to the living room, the space dimly lit by the taunting lamp. He stays on course for the hallway.

Once there, his fingers trace the paint of the wall. His eyes replay him fucking you right here on this floor. The wood. 

Made you cum all over it. He remembers seeing his cum threatening to spill out of your cunt as you recovered from the wood burns that marked up your shoulders and back from his rough gyrations. 

Fuck. He’s getting hard. 

Taehyung needs to stop. He can’t go into your room. Not yet. 

His feet are back peddling. Something is off here. In your place. The smell of it isn’t quite right.

It doesn’t take long before he’s following his nose to your kitchen. His chef nose picks up that whatever is smelling bad in here, is most likely in your refrigerator.

Taehyung does not waste time tugging on the fridge doors. Everything looks okay but something is definitely off. He shuffles through the jars and containers that sit on your shelves. They look fine, but he’s still going to take a moment to sniff each one.

Those are not the culprits. He’s pulling on a drawer. It holds butter, cheeses and dairy. He then closes it. It’s not dairy related. The smell. 

There’s another bin to be opened. There it is. Mushrooms. He can smell them before he sees them. At the back left corner sits a liquefied, bogged bag of murkiness. The appearance alone is ominous. And he’s right for his assumption because when he disrupts its balanced ecosystem the smell from the bag only grows twice as strong.

Taehyung is cringing as his fingers deftly pick up the bag. His other hand comes to help, collecting any toxic drops that were threatening the floors below. The less mess the better. 

Oh here’s another culprit. The trash. It hasn’t been emptied…in what over week?

For fucks sake. 

There’s a disgusting scent wafting up from the bottom and it mixes with the rancid smell of the mushrooms. 

He’s gagging.

You better be glad that he loves you.

Yanking up the plastic bag and bringing it over to the refrigerator. Taehyung is going through it. He has too. 

Touching your things feels good. There's balance in the world.

He knows that everything in this place has your imprint on it. Feels like he’s with you as he handles your knick knacks and takes closer looks at photos and art hung on the wall. 

His curiosity has unfurled and he’s walking bravely around your place, on the lookout for anything that looks like trash. He tosses a package of cookies that are laying on your coffee table. He’ll buy you a new pack. If you need them.

The bathroom trash wasn't full, he'll take it anyway. There are tampons and pads wrapped in the trash. If they’re here now, it’s very possible that you were on your period around the time you asked for space.

He’ll calculate that later, but for now, he questions if your bleeding was the catalyst for asking for space.

Also, why do you have so many earrings? 

They look beautiful on you, but they’re all over the place. 

Taehyung found some on your bathroom counter and some on your nightstand, yet you had a whole jewelry drawer on your dresser. The drawer must be nothing but decoration for you because you placed earrings next to the box. 

You procrastinate.

But that’s okay. He doesn't. 

Taehyung likes to get things done. 

So he will put them away for you and by the time he was done the box was filled with earrings.

[Song suggestion: Dream Girl by Crisaunt]

He also gathered your mail that was strewn around the condo and tucked them on your kitchen island counter. 

Oh and he wiped them too. Your counters. 

When he was finished, he was thoroughly sated. He was covered with a light sheen of sweat by the time he came back from taking out your trash.

But he feels good. Feels proud. Your space looks neater and it was because of him. 

He knows that.

Taehyung just needs this. Just needs to linger a moment longer. Your couch looks so comfy. He straightened all the pillows, folded the blanket that was crushed and buried amongst them.

After removing his slippers. Taehyung gives himself permission. 

He allows himself to fall face down onto your couch. 

And fucking shit. Taehyung should’ve done this when he first stepped inside your place. It smells the most like you besides your panties. He was proud of himself. He didn’t go through your drawers or your hamper.

Yes there’s that ‘Her’ candle that’s currently sitting on his kitchen counter. But now that his face is smushed into the cushion. He’s sure that candle has nothing on you. It’s the fakest representation of your scent.

It’s soft too and warm. Almost like you but not.

Taeyung had you pressed down on this couch before. Ate between your legs as you read that stupid wizard book. You told him it turned you on that he was licking a nerd’s pussy. If you’re a nerd, he’s a geek.

His cock is growing hard again. Fuck.

His tongue licks up and swipes at the fabric pressed to his face. The couch may smell like you but it tastes nothing like you. It’s just fuzz, if fuzz was a flavor. All he knows is that it is not divine. 

Why did he have to think about eating your pussy? 

Because now that he’s thought about it while being surrounded in your essence, Taehyung is all the way hard. He gasps as his head turns to the side, like he’s swimming so he can finally exhale. 

And catch his breath. 

His eyes settle on a photo of you with those two lady friends. But his eyes are pulled to your tits, how low your shirt hangs down. God, your fucking tits….he loves sucking on them, biting on them. 

Fucking them.

And now he can’t stop his hips from grinding his dick into the couch. But not directly.  His cock is rubbing against his boxers, against chinos, against the fucking soft couch. 

It frustrates him.

Taehyung bucks as he brings his hand to the waistband of the pants. Lets his hips rutting to help his hand yank his pants down and his cock free. It's stroking against the soft warm fabric. 

It’s not you. 

But it smells like you. Your body has warmed it up. He’s warmed you up. And it’s warm now. 

Just like you. Only in these ways does the couch remind him of you. 

And nothing else.

Fuck, his pre-cum is weeping onto your couch. 

He cannot stop. 

His sweetness is covering the fabric and only made his glide against it better.

Oh shit, his cock is wedged tightly between his stomach and the warm, wet fabric that’s been under you. And now he’s on top of it. 

So bad. Wants to fuck you, fuck you so bad, on this couch, like he fucked you in the hallway.

A grunt rips out of his throat when he thinks about humping you on your floor. 

How you were so fucking quiet for him although your body broke and shattered around his cock. 

“Nngh.” 

His ear picks up on the desperation lacing his voice. 

Taehyung’s nose is buried in the couch fabric while one hand clenches a pillow and the other is keeping his pants from slipping back over the curve of his ass. The buckle of his belt is pressed above his balls and the sensation makes him dig his toes into the armrest so tight that he’s beginning to get cramps in his thighs.

But Taehyung definitely cannot stop. 

He’s so fucking close to cumming. 

Taehyung’s balls have been filled for days. Heavy with his pain. Loaded with his hurt. He needs this free release. 

He needs to cum.

And so he’s bucking harder. 

His dick is tracing wet patterns up the fabric and back down again. A pool of his precum slicks him up. He thinks about shoving himself into your pussy. Hearing you scream for him. Say his name.

If you were here now, Taehyung wouldn’t tell you to shut up.

He’d let you scream like you were being murdered by his dick. 

You wanted that? Needed that? Didn't you?

His toes are curling and his stomach tightens as his orgasm launches up from his balls. The sensation making him feel like he’s right back and buried in your sweet fucking pussy. 

All the muscles are fired up and loaded for the snap of his orgasm. 

A mangled groan comes from his mouth and he bites down on the pillow his face is smashed against as his body jerks once and he’s cumming. 

God he wished it were you. You that he was pumping into. 

Taehyung's dick continues to pour out its mess onto your couch. And his muscles spasm as the blood from his dick begins to flow back to other parts of his body. 

Fuck. 

He wished he had just unloaded into your warmth. 

Taehyung’s eyes blink open slowly. He wished it was you under him so fucking bad.

His face is wet again. And it’s only getting wetter. Tears pool on the pillow beneath him and then he hears it. The sobs coming from his throat. 

He sounds sad. 

Taehyung sits up carefully as his now unclenched hand rubs the spill of tears on his face and the snot bubbles from his nose. His other hand assists so he can push back and sit on his knees.

Fuck. He made a mess. 

His eyes review the damage. 

Translucent globs clung to the sofa in streaks that were sure to be noticeable once dried. And shit. There’s some on the pillows too. 

Fuck. What is he doing? What has he done?

How could he clean up, only to make a bigger fucking mess? A mess trickier to explain than cleaning up your place.

Taehyung is sniffling as he pulls up his pants and buttons them. 

“I can fix this,” he whispers to himself as his eyes search your place and runs a hand through his damp hair.

He walks to the kitchen, careful to avoid the mirror by your front door as he grabs a dish towel, adds soap and runs it under the water until it turns hot. 

He’s still crying as he scrubs his semen from your couch. He can’t stop the flow of tears that streak down his face while his nose keeps dripping. 

What is wrong with him?

Fuck. He came so big. 

The towel dabs and wipes at the pillows. Working circular motions, hoping that the stain will come out. 

Taehyung is gonna leave as soon as it's all clean. If it doesn’t wipe clean, he’ll flip the pillows and hope the stains will just become a mystery.

He tilts his wrist and looks at the watch buckled fastly there. There’s about an hour before he meets the kids at the bus stop. 

Taehyung is okay.

Everything is okay. No one will know.

And everything will be fine.

[Song suggestion: Speaking Gently by BADBADNOTGOOD] 

Dr. Park Jimin is quiet as he enters. He’s wearing a gold sweater and black pants. There’s no dark leather loafers today, only black boots.

The doctor moves like a dancer. His movements are graceful and purposeful. He switches on the tape recorder without warning and places it on the small table beside him.

He then leans back into his chair and presses his fingertips together. And then nods toward Taehyung. 

“Hello, Mr. Kim.”

“Well, you look mad,” Taehyung huffs as he stares at the doctor, picking up a hint of disdain rolling off him.

And it’s true. 

This version of the doctor differed from the other times. His disposition in the past was like the sweater he was wearing, cheery. The energy radiated, but today was something else entirely.

“I’m not mad Mr. Kim. Why would I be angry?”

Taehyung crosses one leg over the other, the one on top’s foot is shimmying chaotically. 

“I don’t know,” he gestures, reeling one hand into the air. 

“I left abruptly last time. Didn’t finish our session.”

The doctor provides a half-smile as his hands lower and rest palm down on the leather armrests. 

“That’s true. You did leave in a hurry the last time we met.”

Taehyung nods, then licks his lips.

“Yes, exactly. And why you may look mad to me.”

It's quiet and the doctor regards him carefully. 

"Mr. Kim. I am not mad. I am just, curious."

His wiggling foot stops. “Curious about what?”

“What brought you in today? Why are you here?” 

Jimin’s grin gets wider and for some reason it appears eerie to him. Makes him look like that clown in that movie that eats kids.

Taehyung doesn’t know what to say. Why was he sitting here?

“How’s everything with you and Y/N?” Jimin further presses. 

They sit quietly again for a moment, Taehyung’s foot jerking on the floor the only sound.

He was here because he needed to talk about you. Talk about what happened.

“I’m here because I think you were right,” Taehyung admits, pulling his eyes off of the rug to find the doctors’. 

“I should have given her space like you suggested.”

Dr. Park is nodding at him, his smile softening. “Tell me what happened, Taehyung.”

And so he does.

[Song suggestion: La ritournelle by Sebastien Tellier] 

Taehyung steps out his black jeep and eyes the house he once used to call his home.

A single ranch style home, with off white bricks trimmed with a warm tan paint. It looks a little different than the last time he was here. 

There's more shrubs planted along the beds that edge the front of the house. And the lawn is manicured nicely, better than he could keep it in the last few years he resided in the home.

The decision for Sunmi to stay in the house was a straightforward one.

Even though she betrayed him by offering her body to other men while married, it made sense for her to stay there with the kids. 

The more things stayed the same for his babies, the better. 

It was still fucking tough. 

He hasn't been here since he left. Had to take multiple trips to take his shit, loading up his jeep and hauling it to a condo closer to his restaurant over and over again.

Sunmi wanted no part of the restaurant. All she wanted was the kids' stake in the restaurant which he provided since its inception. Besides the money she earned with her regional manager position at a luxury big hotel chain was lucrative.

The screams of kids fill his ears as he walks the pebbled pathway to the door. Giant red and blue rubber-filled helium balloons almost slap him in his face as he goes to knock on the door. 

It feels weird to knock on the door that he used to be able to come and go freely through. But not today. Not anymore. So Taehyung knocks like the visitor he is.

Jackson answers the door. Fuck the handsome and tall bastard. 

"Hey Taehyung," the chiseled asshole smiles and opens the door wider. 

Jackson is wearing a black sweater and matching black jeans. 

"Come on in, the kids were just about to settle down for the movie."

The movie was a Marvel one.

Taehyung's, young friend Jungkook introduced them to the franchise and they went balls to the walls with their interest in that universe.

"Nice." Taehyung feigns as he steps gingerly across the threshold.

The place looks the same. It also looks different.

New pictures hang on the wall. There's one of Sunmi and Jackson. Looks like their engagement photo.

 She told Taehyung that Jackson asked her a few months ago for her hand in marriage and she said yes.

But she also promised there was no rush for a wedding ceremony. It was just an announcement of their commitment to one another.

Commitment.

Taehyung almost laughed when she said the word. But he didn't. He nodded and offered his congratulations out loud to her while offering his condolences to Jackson in his head. 

Jackson was full of life. Hopefully Sunmi wouldn't squeeze every ounce of it from Jackson and invest it in someone new. 

Like she had done to Taehyung.

"Good to see you man," Jackson offers as he slaps Taehyung on the back. 

Jackson's hand tightens on his shoulder as Taehyung stares at the pictures adorned on the entryway wall.

Why was the fucker so strong for?

Taehyung winces under his grip and turns to the sucker, but doesn't miss a family photo he's featured in and still on display. All five of them of the original gang: Sunmi, Chet, Nat, Ella and him, are huddled together in front of an amusement park sign. 

It was taken a few months at a water park before things fell apart. The trip was not his favorite. Him and Sunmi bickered the whole time the kids weren’t paying attention and he remembers she left to go to the bar and drink without him.

Not only does the photo make him mad and sad. It mocks him.

The saccharine inducing picture reminds him of what he once had and what he will never have again with Sunmi.

Just another chapter closed in his book.

His scowl is replaced by a smile as Ella screams for him loudly and runs straight to him, causing Jackson to loosen his hold on Taehyung's shoulder.

"Daddy!" 

His princess is almost to his legs before he snatches her up in his arms and pulls her to him so he can plant kisses on her still chubby cheeks.

Just a few more years and they most likely won't be so round. Growing up does that - takes away the cute chubbies from bodies.

Ella accepts his kisses with giggles and he instantly feels warmer than he felt seconds ago.

"Hey, princess." 

Taehyung's arms tighten and he nuzzles his forehead against hers.

"Daddy, remember I told you my room has changed?” 

She squishes his cheeks and he feels his lips pucker together like a blowfish.

“Come. Come and see," Ella urges as she fights to be released from his embrace.

Jackson has disappeared. 

Good. 

Nat and Chet are huddled with their friends. He’ll talk to them later. It’s best to enjoy their friend's company for now. It was their day after all.

He slides his daughter down so her toes meet the floor and the minute they do, she's gripping his hand and tugging him down the hallway that was once familiar but now is strange. 

Taehyung keeps his eyes on the floor as they walk. It's the only thing that hasn't changed in this place.

He is somewhat regretting agreeing to come to the party. 

Sunmi told him he was invited but understood if he had his own plans for the twins' birthday, he did not.

He had been in such a funk lately he almost forgot his own birthday was in a few days let alone Christmas.

Ella has stopped in front of her closed bedroom door. The black and white polka dot sign that spells her name, painted by him when she was still in Sunmi's tummy, remains on the door.

"Ta-da," Ella says with elegant flourish. Spinning on her tippy toes as she makes her way inside. 

And the room is beautiful. Exactly made for a princess unlike what he had to offer at his condo. 

He hoped to move into an actual house soon. His savings were beginning to show that all could be possible in the next few months. But with you now in the equation, he didn't know how soon that would be.

The walls of the room were painted a blush pink and twinkly lights hung like curtains over her full size bed. The full size bed has a frilly pink and white blanket on it with hearts, but only a little bit of it could be seen because it was filled with stuffed animals, Mazzy holding center stage.

Taehyung's throat closes up. He had just finished painting Ella's room when he discovered Sunmi was cheating. The room remodel was supposed to be a Daddy and Daughter thing. 

It didn't end up that way.

"Do you like it daddy? Mr. Jackson hung up the lights. And see this?"

His kids insisted on adding the mister in front of Jackson’s name even though he said it wasn’t necessary.  “He’s nice and everything's dad, but he’s not you,” Nat had disclosed one visit after the male had moved in weeks prior.

Ella’s running over to the corner of her room where pale lavender lace curtains drape from the ceiling.

"This," she begins, getting on her knees and encouraging him to do the same before she slips under the gauzy material fabric. 

"This is my reading nook."

Inside is a large fuzzy round hot pink cushioned pillow and white fairy lights greet him inside as well. 

"See this?" Ella's hand is slapping against the top of a cardboard box.

"Chet and Nat made this. See? There's the weird dinosaur Chet likes to draw."

Taehyung leans in closer and sure enough there is a googly-eyed green dinosaur with sharp teeth drawn and colored that matches his treasure custom made sharpie.

Inside the box were about a dozen books, a gang of markers and a few stickers.

"This is the box of books I need to read before the end of the school year is over. Chet and Nat have a box too. Once we read all of them, mommy and Mr. Jackson will take us to Playland this summer."

Taehyung oohs and ahhs in response. Amping up his enthusiasm for Ella’s princess room as much as he could muster.

The universe is really dealing him a heavy hand lately because not only did he most possibly lose you, now he's sitting in a house that once belonged to him. With another man at the helm at the stern of the family he helped create. Who helped finish a room for his daughter that he originally began.

After the tour of the room concludes, he lets his princess take his hand and lead him to where everyone is gathered in celebration.

The party is great. It truly is. 

It has all the things kids expect from a birthday gathering: food, games, well, entertainment in general, and the last one is crucial.

Sugar. 

And it’s clear to him that Sunmi and Jackson have pulled together such an event together flawlessly. 

 A projection screen played the latest Marvel release while fresh popped popcorn was scattered around the bamboo floors. The kids’ overdose on sugar and fatty foods were evident in the way they ran and smacked at each other with the items in their goody bags.

The best part of the whole party was that his sons looked happy. 

After the party, Taehyung offers to help get the kids ready for bed as Jackson and Sunmi tidy up the last remnants of festivity. 

He is grateful to assist his children getting ready for bed. Grateful that Sunmi gifts him the opportunity to spend private time with his children on their special day.

Once teeth were brushed and faces washed, the quadruple gathers in the twins’ room and whisper about their favorite parts of the party. 

For Chet, it was the double layer cake that had chocolate fudge on the bottom and strawberry cake on top. He had two slices. And now, a bit of a tummy ache. 

Taehyung rubs Chet’s stomach and kisses his cheek and tells him he will the get boy water soon.

Nat’s favorite part was opening the presents. Taehyung got the Nerf gun that he had been begging for all year. Finally.

Taehyung rolls his eyes at this and then ruffles Nat's hair with his fingers. “Always so savage,” he hums. He then tugs at Nat’s tresses causing the boy to guffaw, “Every day, all day, dad.”

And Ella’s? Ella’s favorite part of the day was that mommy and daddy were back in the same house. 

“It was nice having you both here again,” she says softly and she pokes his cheek with her fingers.

He painted a smile across his face, kissed her on the cheek and told her his favorite part was similar. 

But it wasn't about the house, or being with Sunmi. It was about being with them. His kids. That in fact, being with them was his most favorite thing about the whole week.

They all did a group hug, all coming together and squeezing tight. And as the kids erupt in squeals as they try to tickle under each other’s arms, Taehyung swallows down more tears. 

You’ve wrecked him. He’s broken.

He has been through alot in the last three years, but you removing yourself from his life has opened a whole jar of misery for his soul. Everything seemed to hit his feelings harder than they ever had before.

Taehyung tucks them all in and exchanges a few words of humor and lots of words of love. When he exits Ella’s room and enters the living space, he sees Jackson and Sunmi talking intimately next to the kitchen table.

Their pair of eyes land on him. 

“You both threw an amazing party. Thanks for having me,” he calls out as he waves and heads toward the front door, shrugging on his puffy winter coat he had shed hours ago once he gets there. 

[Song suggestion: What I am by Edie Brickwell and the Bohemian]

The sound of shoes shuffling behind him, causes him to pause at the front door. 

“Taehyung?”

He’s spinning at Sunmi’s call of his name. And for the first time in a long time her eyes on him are kind.

And even better yet, she provides a smile he forgot she had.

“Please stay for a drink?”

He hesitates, but Sunmi continues. “Just you and me. We should talk. Clear the air.”

Taehyung is wary these days. The divorce process wasn't a tedious thing, it was not amicable, but it was almost amicable. 

Kim Namjoon had extended his lawyer services and Taehyung took him up on his offer.

Jackson walks in, hands stuffed in pockets. "Yeah, you two should talk. I'm gonna check on the kids and then head to bed."

"Good to see you Taehyung," Jackson says as he saunters up and proffers a hand.

"Good to see you too, Jackson."

They shake and stare at each other. It's not tense. Just a understanding is passed.

“Don’t stay up too late, love. We have to get up early.” He places a kiss on Sunmi's cheek and she leans in naturally.

"Get home safe, man." Jackson regards him again with a smile and a wave. And then takes his leave quietly.

Taehyung nods and sees Sunmi regarding them carefully.

There’s a nagging thought this may not be the best thing to do tonight. But fuck it. He needs a drink. Just one.

Sunmi’s steps were sure as she saunters back to the kitchen once Jackson heads down the back hallway. 

Taehyung follows close behind her. She always had one hell of a walk, shoulders back, head held high and just a little accent to her hip sway.

“What’s your poison tonight? Wait, don't tell me. Macallan?” 

Sunmi busies herself with filling glasses with ice from the ice maker built in the refrigerator. That’s definitely new. The one that used to be here was outdated and did not have an automatic ice maker. They had to fill up ice trays which at some point became a point of contention in their marriage in the hotter months.

Taehyung acknowledges her and tugs his coat off, throwing it over the back of another chair and then rolling up his sleeves as he takes a seat in the gray sleek chairs.

He can’t help but watch Sunmi. She’s alluring. Sunmi has always been beautiful. Still is. But he can’t help but compare her to you. 

Yes, she’s beautiful. But she’s not you. You hum when you pour drinks, Sunmi is stoic as she pours the brown liquid.

She’s sliding a whiskey in front of him and then settles across from him. Gin. That’s what Sunmi likes to drink. On the rocks. 

The first sips shared between them are tentative and the first words uttered thereafter were forced. 

The dull chatter ranged from “How are you doing?” to “How are your parents doing?” 

But then softened when conversation turned toward the kids and how they were doing in school. And they snickered and laughed at all the gossip occurring in the neighborhood. Who was sleeping with who and who was almost in financial ruin made Taehyung feel a bit better about his circumstances. 

When the benign chatter well ran dry and their drinks were nearly consumed, Taehyung finds himself thinking about you and checks his watch. 

Maybe you would be home when he gets back? 

Maybe tonight will be the night you return to your home?

“So, who is the Donut Lady, Taehyung?” Sunmi asks as she rotates the crystal tumbler in her hand before she takes a neat sip of her drink. Her alcohol-induced glittery eyes are fixed on him. 

She had an uncanny way of picking up on the things on his mind.

But fuck. Ella has been talking. She’s the only one who repeatedly calls you, Donut Lady.

Hell probably all of them were talking about you. How could they not? 

Taehyung finds himself getting mad for even bringing you around his kids. They were fond of you. This could be a huge mistake he made.

“Donut Lady is a woman who occasionally brings me fresh hot baked goods.” he smirks as he takes a drink from his cup.

“Let me guess jelly-filled.” 

“Mmmm, close. Cream,” Taehyung laughs and Sunmi’s giggles soon join with him. 

The banter used to be nice with Sunmi. And then at some point it just got mean. But this right now, right here just felt comfortable. 

For Taehyung, it’s something like another dimension. Or like being Dorothy in Oz. 

Everything seems the same, but in reality everything has changed. Sunmi is familiar and unfamiliar. It messes with his head as he sits here and drinks with her. With every sip he takes of his whiskey.

He’s not proud to admit it but he has routinely called Sunmi out of her name in his head even though she was the mother of his children. A really wonderful mom, actually.

“Tay-ayyyyyye do you like this Donut Lady?” Sunmi is wiggling in her chair as she pins him with the accusation. 

It's endearing and odd. 

“I do.” He sings songs back with a chuckle and then swallows the last remaining drop of his herbaceous amber.

“I know,” she shares as she leans her upper body onto the table.  

“You’ve been looking happier Taehyung. And the kids began to mention a nice woman who brings donuts and hangs out with all of you the weeks they are with you. I don’t think the kids could put the pieces together. But I could.”

Taehyung doesn’t have to look at Sunmi to know she’s smiling. He keeps his gaze to the ice in his glass. That’s how his heart feels. Cold. Talking about you like this is hard.

“Why don’t you bring her around sometime?” 

He looks up at Sunmi. 

“Or to McDonald's, you know? Or I could pick the kids up at your place one Friday. I would like to meet her. See your place.”

“I’m not sure if she will be-”

“Tae.”

“Y/N, she’s diff-”

“Tae.”

His words die on his tongue as she hits him with a look. The look is one of concern.  

“What’s wrong, Taehyung?”

The truth of the matter is he would introduce you to Sunmi. If you were okay with it. If you wanted to be with him. But it's been weeks since he saw you, let alone spoken to you. 

What's he supposed to tell Sunmi? That he followed you? That prior to that he was just watching you from afar?

No.

What he needed was answers. But not about you right now. No he needed to know what the fuck is wrong with him. 

And why do women keep leaving him?

[Song suggestion: Cry Me A River by Julie London]

“Tell me how I fucked up. In our marriage,” he bites out, raking his hand up his forehead to remove the strands over his eyes. His eyes turn toward Sunmi and she takes down the rest of her drink.

“I’ve already told you Taehyung. Us, not working out…I had just as much of a role in it as you. And I handled the-”

“Sunmi, I know what you told me in the past. I've heard it. But let’s drink and talk like friends and not like we were once married. Tell me how I fucked up in our relationship,” he goads, hand cupping and thumping into his chest. 

“Because I really like her. And I want to keep her close. But I don’t think I can do that if I don’t know what made you step out on me? What did I do wrong?”

They stare at one another. His heart is racing and he can see the pulse point in Sunmi's neck thumping. 

“We both need another drink,” Sunmi announces as she kicks back her chair and circles to the kitchen counter for the bottle of gin and whiskey to refresh the drinks.

“If we are going to have this talk Taehyung. It goes both ways. I cheated. That was fucked up of me. It wasn’t right. And I'm sorry."

"But I have my own questions, I would like answered as well. If you're okay with answering them tonight?"

Taehyung nods and licks his lips as she walks back toward him and slides the bottle in front of him.

She nods. He pours. 

“Taehyung. I loved you before you loved me.”

This isn’t news to him. 

It’s something that giggled extensively about when they first began dating and throughout the course of their relationship. They were friends, but Sunmi let him know she was interested in him. He was reluctant. 

Sure, he thought she was pretty, but he really enjoyed her company as his friend. And then things developed slowly between them, one night after a round of drinks. 

Just like this. 

Except then, there were no hurt feelings or bruised egos. Then…there was nothing but hope and a need to be close and then closer. Him and Sunmi were the quintessential slow burn trope couple. But once they sparked, they sizzled and burned fiery red. 

“And I know the twins were an oopsie. They came at the very beginning stages of 'I love yous’ but it wasn't until they were born that I learned what true love looked like on your face.” 

Sunmi's fingers trace the glossy ash table as she makes her way back to her chair.

“What do you mean?” Taehyung can hear the tick of a clock somewhere.

He hates it. The sound muddles with the counting in his head. Throws him off.

“I mean you love our kids. There’s no doubt about that. I look at you with them and I can tell how much they mean to you. It's written all over your face.” 

Sunmi takes a deep breath and finally retakes her seat from across from him.

“And the silly thing about it is, I was beginning to resent how much you loved them. Because I knew you didn't love me even half as much as them.”

“That’s not true Sunmi,” he interrupts, reaching his hand palm up on the table. “I lov-”

Her hand slides lightly into his. The fit is odd. 

How long has it been since her hand in his felt right?

“Yes, you loved me Taehyung. But it wasn’t until I saw you with the boys that I realized I was married to a man whose love shines from every pore of his being. And yet, I had never seen that with you. The way your face lights up when you see them. It never did with me…"

"The thing is, with every child we had together, the more I felt you fell in love with me. That,” her voice cracks as her eyes strain from his and look down at the cup on the table. 

“You loved me more because I am the mother of you children, not because I was the love of your life.” 

He sees a tear run down her cheek. Even though he’s no longer in love with Sunmi, the sight of her getting upset because of how he made her feel fucked with him. 

Maybe he’s not a creep. Maybe he’s just a fucking monster. 

Taehyung spots a box of tissues and offers them to her, which she accepts graciously. He’s not sure what to say. If he should say anything at all.  

Was that it? Was this the reason Sunmi strayed? She didn’t think he loved her? 

"I loved you Sunmi. That's all I know."

She laughs lightly and shakes her head. 

"It's okay Tae. I knew. I knew all along. And I was okay with the way you loved me. If the kids were the reason for me to get a taste of that, I was okay with that. But then…"

"I forgot our ninth anniversary." Sunmi nods solemnly. 

"Oh yes," she murmurs, dragging out the s and looking at the top of her glass as she takes a sip. 

"But that was more like a final straw, Tae. Before that ...the calls… fo you remember…well maybe you don’t but around the time I got pregnant with the twins. You used to call me every day when you were at work. Just to see how I was feeling.” 

Sunmi sighs and leans back into her chair, her eyes fixed on a picture of their kids. The boys are wearing white button up shirts with green bow ties. Ella is wearing an emerald green dress that is too elaborate for a baby and a small tiny white bow in her hair. His princess is draped across her big brothers’ laps and they all look up at the camera. All of their faces are the perfect depiction of their personalities. 

Nat is not smiling. His lips are a tight line across his face. Chet is winking at the camera, one cheek bunched, the smile lopsided. And Ella’s eyes are big and round and her lips make an oval shape. A small bubble of spit sits at the corner of her mouth.

It’s adorable. Taehyung almost forgot about this photo shoot.  He needs a copy of those pictures. But not the one that includes him and Sunmi. Just the ones with the kids in them.

“And then a few years after Ella was born. The little check-ins dwindled to every other day, to once a week and then completely stopped."

“I was opening the restaurant then Sunmi. There was so much work to do. And I wanted - needed to provide for all of us.” Taehyung urges with a hush, his hand squeezing hers again.

Her face is still etched in pain. It makes him sad and angry.

She's right. 

He did let some things slip through the cracks like the daily check ins and the movie nights. But he was busy trying to get permits, gutting the original plan for the kitchen in the restaurant, and creating a menu that would draw customers in.

“I know it wasn’t right, but I was hoping you would stick by me. You knew it was my dream and instead of standing next to me you were fucking other men while I working hard.”

Sunmi scoffs and her gaze meets his again. And this time her stare is hardened and cold. 

“Was it really the restaurant who took all your time or was it just a good reason to avoid me?"

Taehyung regards her and he sees her jaw tighten before she’s bringing her glass to her lips and gulping loudly on what’s left in her glass. 

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, Taehyung. You pretty much ignored me for over a year and half.”

“That’s not tr-”

“It is. It is true. You barely touched me. We had sex like a handful on times during that time. And before you found out about me cheating we barely talked. You don’t remember?”

“I remember you wouldn’t lay off about me getting a vasectomy. That every time I opened my mouth you were telling me you don’t want any more of my babies.” Taehyung spits out as he finishes his drink and tersely plants the tumbler back on the table.

Around the same time of opening the restaurant, Sunmi told him she thought she was done having babies.

Suggested that he could get a vasectomy rather than her getting her tubes tied. That if they changed their mind in the future it would be easier for him to reverse.

Taehyung humored her at first. Telling her maybe. But the truth is, he wanted to have more children. Wanted as many that life could or would bestow on him.

He thought it bought him some time to finish opening the restaurant. But she wouldn’t let up.

A few weeks later Sunmi is asking him again and, then again. Weeks later she’s pressuring him to have a consultation with a doctor. 

And when he refused to go, Sunmi went to the doctor instead and got an IUD implanted. He didn't understand why.

“Why didn't you want any more of my babies?”

He asked the question out loud that he carried around silently for years. Every time he wanted to touch Sunmi, it just felt off. The two of them made beautiful kids. 

She is a great mother. He is a good dad. 

Why didn’t you want any more? 

“It wasn't about not having your babies, Tae. It was just about me focusing on me and what I wanted to do. You had the restaurant.” Her arms fold across her chest and Taehyung feels his eyes roll in his brain.

“Sunmi, you could have always been the general manager at the restaurant. I asked you multiple times.”

“The restaurant was your dream, Tae. Not mine,” she unfolds her arm and leans across the table, picking up the whiskey bottle and pouring more in his glass. 

“You know I always loved working in luxury hotels. I thrive in that environment. I needed something other than just being your wife and their mom,” she huffs pointing to the kids’ portrait hung above his shoulder.

“So how does you getting dicked down by other men help you follow your dream?”

Sunmi stops mid-pour of her drink to look up at him. 

“Tae, I was self-conscious. My body was different from having three babies. And you changed. Changed toward me. And honestly, you were going out with Jungkook and Seokjin every moment you were free instead of me.”

She picks up her glass and take a sip.

“And when I first cheated, the man was giving me attention and I-I was weak. It’s not an excuse, but I thought you were cheating.” 

Her voice is small and delicate. Taehyung watches her throat wobble with a swallow.

That was like a slap in the face. He never cheated on Sunmi. Never. But did he got to the strip club with Seokjin occasionally? Yes.

Was it sometimes easier to go there than to face Sunmi? Yes.

“If I could undo it, Tae. I would,” she sniffs as another tear falls down her face and Taehyung feels his nose running again. 

Goddamn it.

“But even if I did undo it, Tae. I still think we would have ended.” She sighs and looks up at him. 

“Does that even make sense?”

And for Taehyung it did. It made all the sense in the world.

[Song suggestion: Nothing In Return by Monsune]

“Koooookie! Aye, issa me, Chef. Can you pic'me up at tha place that I once call my home, but issnt my home anymore?” Taehyung giggles into the phone.

Taehyung’s sitting on the curb next to his jeep. Sunmi tried to order him a taxi but he refused. Jungkook lived less than five minutes away. 

His friend will help him. Good ol’ Jeon Jungkook. 

“Fuck Chef. You sound so fucking loaded. Wait, did you say you’re at your old home?”

Jungkook sounds funny. His voice went from deep and heavy with sleep to a high pitched whine in seconds. 

Jeon Jungkook, jizz maker extraordinaire, Taehyung thinks and then snickers to himself.

“Chef? You still there?” 

“I did. I am.” Taehyung’s giggling like mad. He’s had four glasses of whiskey. This week sucked, and today took the cock sucker award for sure.

“Fuck, I will be there in ten.” Jungkook says shortly before hanging up.

After hanging up the phone, Taehyung thinks about the last few minutes in his place that he used to call home.

As struggled to put on his coat, with the help of Sunmi he can’t dismiss the way her eyes linger on him or the way her fingers trailed over the fabric.

As he arranged the coat on his shoulders, Taehyung saw Sunmi staring at him.

"Thanks for staying and talking with me Taehyung. It means alot to me."

Her voice was so gentle and the look on her face even softer. 

They were friends first. Taehyung had met Sunmi over a decade ago at culinary school. In the same graduation year.

He had laughed with her before he loved her. And it was good to laugh with her. It had been too long since they had done that. The usual form of communication between them at the end was silence and passive aggressive digs.

But something returned tonight. Or maybe forever. He felt like he was getting his friend back.

"Thank you for having me over Sunmi. You and Jackson did a great job. The kids had a great time."

She nodded and whispered a thank you. 

"Can I hug you?"

He thought they would never touch again let alone hug. It has been too long since they hugged as well.

"Of course."

And then they moved toward one another. Her arms looped around his shoulders and his circled her rib cage. 

The embrace is warm. And it feels the same and different. But not in a bad way. In a way that's comforting and full of grace. 

When they pull apart, Sunmi's hands meet his. "Taehyung just remember we were damn near babies ourselves when we had ours. I don’t regret any of the years I shared with you. I want you to know that.”

“You deserve to be happy Taehyung. And if that’s with Donut lady? I wish you all the best,” she said tugging him in one last time for a hug. 

"At this point, I will take anything." 

“Hey! Fuck face! Get in the car,” Jungkook yells from the driver’s side window as his Steel gray Bronco rolls into the cul-de-sac, music bumping like it’s not…

Taehyung squints his eyes at his watch.

It’s a little after midnight. His friend is pulling through like half the neighborhood is not asleep.

“Kook, you’re such a dickweed. You all alone on a Saturday night?” Taehyung jousts back as Jungkook reaches over the passenger seat to pop the door open for him.

“Saturday nights are for lovers. But I got a fuck scheduled on Sunday, so hurry the fuck in so I can get my beauty sleep,” Jungkook bats his eyelashes as Taehyung stumbles into the car and his butt plunks down on the heated leather seats.

“Pfft, you keep using the same moves to bag women Kook? Make them waffles with a fresh side of jizz?” Taehyung asks as he slams the door shut, narrowly missing the tips of his shoes.

“Oh you’re in rare form tonight Chef. Let’s see what you have to say about me picking you up from your ex's house in the morning shall we?” 

Jungkook laughs as he cuts his eyes at Taehyung before his sous chef is maneuvering the car to his very empty condo.

[Song suggestion: Black Star by Tokyo Black Star]

“So your new strange is also your neighbor?" Jungkook balks.  

The muscle man is dragging his very drunk form to the kitchen table and dumps him into a chair. Taehyung slumps onto the tabletop immediately, palms flat on the table and head on arms.

"Umph,” is the only thing he can reply. 

“You know I like a new strange any chance I get, but strange that lives across the corridor? Absolutely not. When you bring another fuck buddy home, the neighbor strange is going to come knocking on your door asking if she can borrow a jar full of air. And then before you know it the cops are dragging one or both of your sexual partners to jail.”

“I’m not interested in a new fuck buddy right now,” Taehyung sighs as soberness begins to return to him again.

He wasn’t expecting the conversation he had with Sunmi tonight. So much had happened today that exhaustion was settling deeply into his bones. 

Taehyung hasn’t slept well since he last saw you. Getting by with sometimes three, four, maybe five hours a night.

Thinking of you has him getting to his feet and bumbling to blinds hung above his kitchen sink. He leans and yanks a slat down. 

No light shines behind your window. Your place is still as dark as the night sky.

“See? Then there’s that too.”

“What?” 

Taehyung is startled by Jungkook’s close proximity. He turns and his young friend is holding a mug out to him.

“Here’s some water, “ Jungkook proclaims, and watches as Taehyung takes the mug from his grasp.

 Bringing it to his lips, Jungkook takes Taehyung’s sipping occupation as a moment to continue.

“The other thing with fucking your neighbor is you will be checking on each other. At least one of you will. It’s human nature. And when you tell her you’re busy, will she believe you? Suspicion is a human condition.” 

“Look who got more mature over the last few months,” Taehyung scoffs as he takes a big gulp from his cup and watches Jungkook step around him, then peek through the blinds. 

But hold on. The taste on his tongue is not fucking water. He fights to swallow the liquid in his mouth down. 

“What the fuck, Kook? That’s not fucking water.”

Taehyung’s mouth is filled with a bitter, oily saliva. He’s wincing and his stomach is suddenly tossing and turning like he’s on a jerky rollercoaster.

Jungkook chuckles. “I thought you would know me better than that Chef. It's baking soda and water. You can’t be hungover tomorrow. The restaurant has two hundred and ten reservations on the books.”

Taehyung needs to make it the bathroom. Now. He’s racing down his hallway, bare feet slapping against wood floors as he bites back to release of all the food he consumed today back to the outside world. 

As his stomach empties its contents, Taehyung finds himself hunching over the toilet bowl and shuddering violently. 

Between hurls he can feel Jungkook patting his back.

“Chef, don’t be angry. It’s that time of the year to make bank while dealing with assholes who have fat pockets.”

“Besides,” Jungkook’s hand removes from his back.  

“You’d be angrier if you woke up hungover to do all that.” 

Jungkook’s right. He’s done the same to him on many occasions.

Taehyung’s stomach is finally empty and he’s gasping to try and catch his breath. His ass is meeting the floor tiles and he scoots his back to meet the porcelain bathtub. Its coolness seeps under his now drenched sweater. 

He peels open his eyes and Jungkook is leaning on the counter, legs crossed at the knees and his arms folded at the elbow. 

Their eyes meet and the “jizz extraordinaire” is back. Jungkook’s eyes look round, shiny and mischievous. And his lips spread into a lazy, dazzling smile.

“Speaking of hungover. What are your plans for your birthday?”

The holidays come and go. The restaurant was busy, but that’s a good thing. His whole year end top line depended on a solid December revenue. 

And it was better than solid, it was stellar.

As always, Taehyung still made time for his kids, and picked them up on Christmas Day. 

Together they opened presents, made cookies and ate noodles. Then they made a pillow fort in the living room and slept there with a fake fireplace roaring on the large flat screen tv. 

The days rolled on and Taehyung didn’t hear from you. But he couldn’t help it on Christmas Day. He couldn't stay away.  

Before he picked up his kids, he sent you a text. Just wanted you to know that even though you had forgotten about him, he hadn’t forgotten about you. 

Taehyung wished you a Merry Christmas and he told you he loved you, again.

You did not reply.

And now he’s begrudgingly, pulling on a royal blue sweater and some charcoal pants because Thing 1 and Thing 2, Seokjin and Jungkook, have insisted on taking him out for his birthday. 

Insisted that if he didn’t celebrate his  birthday in some big way that he would have terrible sex for the next five years. They reasoned that it was too big of a risk for a man in his situation to be in. 

Taehyung has had amazing sex for years. He was not worried about that. 

No, his concern, especially tonight is what kind of trouble would land in lap because of Seokjin and Jungkook.

To date, they've lost a drunk Jungkook up a tree. Dude was so wasted he decided that he needed to climb a tree in his neighborhood like King Kong climbing the Empire State Building. 

He climbed the tree alright. Climbed it so high that he couldn't get down. Taehyung had to call the fire department to rescue him.

And Seokjin wandered three miles from a bar they were at on foot so he could eat some chicken he was craving. The place closed an hour before he got there. When they found Seokjin he was curled next to their entrance fast asleep.

These two were faster at getting into trouble than his twins when they were in the throws of their torturous threes.

Taehyung doesn't know when terrible twos got a bad rep in the toddler chronicles. The age of three was the absolutely most craze inducing time with all of his kids. 

For him. Hands down. Three-year-olds are the worst.

[Song suggestion: move. by brb]

Taehyung jumps in place at the sudden pounding on his front door. 

Barely, pulling it ajar, Jungkook is crowding his way inside, fitted with a black turtleneck and black slacks. 

And his mentor? Is yodeling at the top of his lungs. Which is making the young one pop and lock as he walks toward his kitchen.

It’s the “Happy Birthday Song” that is bouncing off his walls from his surprisingly in key mentor that Taehyung's sure he’ll hear about from Maya next week at the board meeting.

Seokjin's arms are already out wide as he enters. There's two blunts in his hand.

Oh shit. These two are going to try to get him to outer space tonight.

Taehyung is happy to not be alone on his birthday night. But he is tired. Dinner service had been brutal. 

When they planned this, Seokjin made it seem like just a couple of guys hanging out, getting some drinks.

Jungkook is yanking his cupboard open and sorting through his cup and glasses. 

“Taxi will be here in fifteen minutes. Let’s toast to the birthday asshole before we start out on our fuckery,” Jungkook announces, holding up a bottle of Fireball.

Oh shit. Please drinking angels don’t let me die on my thirtieth birthday, he prays silently.

'Fuck yeah,” His mentor screams midway through the celebratory song, stopping his serenading abruptly.

Taehyung often forgets that Seokjin is older than hell. And sometimes, sometimes he forgets that Seokjin is also older than Jungkook. The man looked like he was aging backward.

He’s wearing a bright white sweater with a huge royal whale on his torse, dark blue jeans sit on his waist. 

Oop. Nope. He’s wearing dad shoes. Adds about four years to his look.

He almost looks his age right now.

Taehyung can’t help but giggle at himself as Seokjin’s chunky white shoes clomp against his wooden floors.

“Get your ass over here and drink!” Jungkook yells, smacking his palm on the counter as he finishes pouring the last shot.

Still laughing, Taehyung make his way to his best friends.

“I’ll make the toast,” Seokjin confides, his smile tamping down to have his lips pressed together somberly. 

Jungkook nods as he passes out the glasses, and then holds his in the air. 

“Taehyung, my dear protégé and dearest friend. We celebrate you tonight. And to do that well we will get your dick wet so you can forget about Sunmi and the neighbor strange across the way."

Taehyung winces. He confided in both men days ago that you asked for space. He didn't detail why and they didn't ask. They both had rolled their eyes and the word, "women," escaped their lips with a sigh.

"So here's to another year of surviving, fucking and living life!"

Seokjin is there clanking his glass to Taehyung's and Jungkook does the same before they kick back their fireballs. 

And before their glasses rest for long on the counter, Jungkook is pouring another round just before they meet the taxi at the sidewalk.

As they squeeze into the back of the cab, Taehyung is feeling warm and giggly.

Seokjin had a dinner reservation at a new hot restaurant named Firewater downtown. 

There seems to be a theme about fires and Taehyung hopes that he doesn't actually see one tonight.

Seokjin had almost burnt down his condo down after deciding to cook a souffle after a night of drinking. Since then drunk cooking has been banned from their friend circle.

Firewater was a late night dining establishment and the atmosphere was amazing. The town was bustling and preparing for new years festivities. And the restaurant was packed with lively people in the mood to celebrate.

Plate after plate of exquisite food landed on their table and by course seven Taehyung was completely and utterly stuffed.

But that's the only civil thing they did because right now. Right now?

Taehyung takes a sip of his drink and a curvy woman wearing leopard print panties is wrapping herself around Jungkook's waist as he sits in his chair.

The young one's face is sweaty and his hair is sticking up all over his head thanks to the stripper running her hands through it repeatedly.

[Song suggestion: Running Away by Vano3000, BADBADNOTGOOD]

"The boy is having the time of his life," Seokjin muses next to him, eyes roving around the dark space punctuated by flashing pink, blue and purple lights.

"He is," Taehyung agrees as he sips on his whiskey. He's tipsy. He's had fun. 

"You're about to have the time of your life, too," Seokjin grins as his eyes look over Taehyung's shoulder.

Taehyung doesn't get a chance to turn before he feels cool fingers at the back of his neck that then slide over to his round of his shoulder.

Looking up, he is met with warm hood lidded brown eyes and glossy pink lips.

"Hi birthday boy. I'm Star. Your birthday gift," the very shapely woman in a dark green sparkly number purrs as she pinches one of his ear lobes with her fingers.

He feels her touch tingle down his spine and he's thinking of you. You make him feel like this all the time.

Taehyung tears his eyes from her figure to look at his friends. Both of them are looking at him and Jungkook nods and smiles, displaying his front teeth cutely.

"Come with me?" Star asks as she holds an open as hand out to him.

His brows know in confusion. "Go asshole. She's the best dancer here and we paid top dollar for a titillating dance," Seokjin complains loudly as his brows waggle suggestively.

Then he's leaning in close. "She's down for whatever. Pointed you out and she said you could 'get it,'" Seokjin hush whispers.

Taehyung doesn't get to answer because Star is now pulling on his wrist and prompting him out of his seat.

He's following her between tables and gawking men and women. The other customers' eyes all flicker to the leggy dancer strutting in front of him.

The woman is built and stacked. Her ass was fat and her hips wide. Taehyung's eyes couldn't stop eating up every inch of flesh revealed.

Taehyung hadn't cum since he was crying in your place. It was like his dick had gone into survival mode. Even his morning wood lasted only for a few seconds before deflating.

But his dick is lightly awakening with every step he takes after her. 

Star exchanges words with a bouncer standing before dark velvet curtains that were closed snugly. The meatball head nods at her and then pulls back one section, allowing her and then Taehyung entry.

The space is sensual, a golden glow washed over the walls, which were covered in black and purple paisley shapes. A sparkly chandelier hangs from the ceiling and black leather chairs and sofas are tucked in the corners.

"Would you like something to drink before we begin, sexy?"

Star's eyes glance at the small bar set to side, being manned by a dude who looks almost as big as the meatball head guy standing on the other side of the curtains.

"Uh, no. Thanks."

Soon she's wrapping her hands around his bicep and tugging him along again. They pass rooms that are occupied, noted by a drawn velvet curtain.

They arrive in an empty room and Star pulls the curtain closed as he steps inside thanks to her head indication.

"Tonight's about your birthday, daddy. Let me take care of you." 

Taehyung wills himself not to roll his eyes as she gently pushes him down into the leather sofa there.

He watches as she pushes a few buttons on a black wall panel, music filling the space and the thumping bass vibrates up his scrotum. And his cock likes it.

Especially likes it because now Star slinking to him. Her toes are pointed and her strides long. 

Her hips roll with the beat and her breasts sway. She nails him with a seductive look as she gets closer to him, her hands slide up her body, her chest juts out to him as they ghost her curves.

Star is making him forget you. He can feel his soul in his body right now and it's literally hell on Earth.

She's making his body feel hot all over. 

He's been in champagne rooms before, this isn't his first strip dance rodeo. But, Star hasn't told him to keep his hand to himself.

No the opposite. She's letting him touch her ass and thighs.

He must've blanked because he doesn't remember when she crawled into his lap and he doesn't remember when her tongue entered his mouth.

"Fuck you're so hot. I can't remember when a really decent guy came in," she huffs into his mouth. 

She grinds into his boner and he grunts against her. "Fuck you even sound good."

Star is standing up and the room is spinning. 

She grabs his hands and puts them on her hips as her satin covered pussy gyrates close and closer to his face, the fabric being pulled low and lower.

Taehyung can see nothing but skin underneath. His stomach jerks at the realization that he's about to see another pussy in the flesh and it doesn't belong to Sunmi or you. 

And when they fall to the ground. Taehyung's stomach falls too. And for the second time of the month he's vomiting. It crept up on him violently.

He missed his chunks getting on her cunt but her legs and toes were not so fortunate.

His seven course meal is all over her.

Star lets out a blood curdling scream  and soon the beefy bartender is taking Taehyung down and hurling him out what he presumes is the back of the club. 

Taehyung's head is soopy but he's not drunk. Star's body was gorgeous. Her natural smell, unfortunately, was not. 

There's all types of reasons a woman can smell off but Taehyung's sensitive nose could not handle what her pussy was emitting.

[Song suggestion: Cool to You by Teenage Priest]

"Broooooo!" Seokjin is turning the corner on the sidewalk with his phone in hand, arms spread wide. Jungkook is a few steps behind him, the hem of his turtleneck pinched between his teeth as he adjusts the belt on his waist.

"You threw up on a stripper's pussy?” Seokjin is cackling as he slaps his back.

"I didn't throw up on her. Just her legs…and feet."

Jungkook's laughing now that he has straightened up his appearance. "Does this trump my jizz bag story?"

Seokjin pauses his laughing to give Jungkook's question great consideration. 

"It's pretty much a tie," Jin decides, bringing his fingers to trace his lips.

"Bullshit, his is worse than my jizz story." Jungkook begins dancing to the songs that play shuffle in his mind's eye. 

They watch him as he shimmies his hips and bounces side to side.

"Bullshit. That wasn't intentional. How was I supposed to know that her pussy was gonna smell…off?"

"True. He didn't know. I should've warned him,"  Seokjin speaks up looking at Jungkook and then Taehyung. 

They all break into laughter, shoulders and hands slapping at each other and Taehyung can feel a new type of tears threaten his eyes.

Wiping at his eyes he sees a taxi idling meters away from them.

"That us?" Taehyung points to the  car.

"Yeah that's us," Seokjin nods, straightening his posture.

"Can I just say for the record?" Jungkook turns back to them as he walks backward toward the cab.

"Taehyung, it may be unintentional. But my jizz bag story only affected my dick getting wet."

They all greet the driver and climb into the car. 

"But your pussy vomit. It kept us all from getting laid." Jungkook closes the taxi door. 

"Friends help friends get laid."

[Song suggestion: Hello? by Clario]

Taehyung is home. He's been home for almost an hour and it's a little after 3am. He should go to sleep.

It's New Year's Eve. They're running a special menu tonight. Lots to do.

But he can't fall asleep. 

The light to your home was on when he got home. He checked again just a few minutes ago. The light was off again.

He's still tipsy. Jungkook and Seokjin insisted they could not end the night with the strip club fail. 

So they went to a bar around the corner and Taehyung walked home once Jungkook found his hook up of the night. 

He’s too drunk to drink straight. Because it almost feels like he’s watching his own body walk across the corridor and slide the key into the lock. 

Turning the knob slowly, he inches the door open and not one light is on when he pokes his head in. It's completely dark. He lets his eyes adjust to the darkness as the door closes behind him with a hush.

Leave the door unlocked, the creep in him whispers. The floor is cold under his feet. 

Fuck, he forgot his slippers.

It's quiet. Really quiet. So quiet that he's scared to move. 

This isn't the first time in your place since he fucked your couch. He has visited a few more times, laying faceup on your bed, staring at the ceiling in the middle of night.

It's his birthday. If you're here. Just looking at you would make it the best birthday ever, he reasons.

That gets him to move, tiptoeing down the hallway until he's outside your bedroom door. 

It's cracked very slightly. 

He gets down quietly on to his knees letting his hands join into the floor. His eyes peek under the door. 

There is no light.

Oh but he can hear something now. It's you. You're snoring. 

Taehyung positions on foot so it plants on the floor. His hand turns the knob, and it moves without sound.

As the door cracks open, the freshness of your scent greets him.  Your smell surrounds him. And he shudders as he attempts to stand fully and nudge the door open.

He can smell you. The room is filled with the freshness of it. 

His eyes adjust to the light and he can see a dark figure laying on your bed. 

Taehyung knows it's you. You're laying on your stomach, one of your legs is hanging out from beneath the covers. Skin from your toes to your hip is on display.

Are you naked under there? 

You have to sleep naked because he finds it hard to believe you were wearing panties at the moment.

His cock is hardening and he grips it tightly to contain the groan that's building in his chest.

Taehyung has missed you.

Knees plant onto the floor carefully and he sees that the sock on your foot is partially off.

The elastic of the ankle is clinging to the ball of your big toe. He lets his fingers tug the loose material and then he's pulling it off slowly, clutching it tightly in his fist.

His nose is close to the sole of your exposed foot.

Not touching, but almost. You smell so good. Even your foot smells better than Star's cunt. 

His cock jerks in his other hand and Taehyung's knuckles get covered with pre-cum.

He would love nothing more than to peel off the covers and bury his head between your ass cheeks. Dig his tongue deep into your tight rim as his fingers stroke in your cunt.

Taehyung's grip around the head of his dick tightens and squeezes. He's trying to control himself but fails with a whimper shaking over his lips.

You're shuffling the tip of your toe flicking across his bottom lip.

He's frozen. 

You're gonna wake up and find him at the end of your bed, kneeling with his hand on his cock.

But you don't. Your soft breathing resumes and Taehyung adrenaline shoots to his dick. You're naked underneath. He can't see your pussy because of the lack of light. But he can see shadows. And all he sees is skin.

He continues pumping himself, his cock keeps growing harder and keeps leaking. His teeth clench to contain his moans and just when he thinks they're about to break, he's stuffing the sock in his fist  into his mouth to release his pleasure filled sounds into. 

Stopping. Doesn't even become an option at this point. 

He's near you. 

His balls are heavy. 

It's his birthday. 

His thoughts jumble as he thinks about crawling over you and sticking his cock right up your ass. 

It's been twenty-one days since he’s last seen you. Last touched you. 

And Taehyung feels exposed and sensitive in your presence. He's spasming at every twist of his wrist. Every touch to his cock.

Beads of sweat, prickle his hair line and and his gut is tightening deliciously. The sock is warm and moist on his tongue and it feels so good to have something of yours in his mouth again.

He can feel the sock dripping and he sucks on it slightly thinking about how yummy you probably taste right now. The thrill of you catching him, worshiping you like this has him tripping over his orgasm.

Do not make a mess again, Taehyung thinks as he tugs the sock from his gritted teeth.

He places the sock over his cock, and the warm damp soggy sock has him cumming as the tip of his tongue licks over the nub of your pinky toe. 

His cum seeps through the sock and his fingers are wet as he pumps to finish, shaking hard as he fights to control the moans clawing at his throat. His other hand reaches the floor and his fingernails grasp the tufts of the rug tightly, a few threads tugging free in his fist.

Taehyung's cock is still dripping as he forces himself to his feet, willing his feet to tread delicately to your bedroom door as he presses the sock harder against his cock. Cleaning up as he moves along.

As he navigates your hallway again, the sock returns to being fisted in his hand and he pulls his pants up as his teeth bite down on his lips. 

He’s a creep. He’s a menace. He’s a monster.

Fast and quiet. His tipsiness must’ve exited his dick through his cum because he feels completely awake as he makes his way to the front door and slides on his slippers. 

Taehyung glances around before he opens your front door. It makes little to no noise to his ears. His fingers flip the lock from the inside before he’s closing it on the outside.

His other hand moves and it’s sticky. Sticky from his spit and cum. He opens his hand and looks at the sloppy sock resting in his hand, and small white lettering calls to him.

He holds it up and stretches the fabric a bit. The sock is gray and has a rain cloud with colorful raindrops falling from it and a zigzag of lightning. And beneath it the words “We are fucked,” is written in script.

And Taehyung couldn’t agree more.

When it came to you, he was completely and utterly fucked.

Next: Six

[sftykth]

Hi,,,, so... I came to read night secrets again and I can't seem to find it 😭 did you delete it? 🥺

yeah i did delete it.. i wasn’t very happy with it and because i can be quite a perfectionist at times i didn’t want it on my account, sorry anon:)

#ask me things

[sftykth]

night secrets was so hot omg please make a part 2!!! i beg of u dear author🧎🏻‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️

omg tysm! yan tae is one of my faves so i will try writing the couple more often:,)

#ask me things #night secrets #sftykth fic asks

[sftykth]

is this our fate? ⇾ kth preview.

♡ summary: when you catch your husband cheating on you with your best friend, your world starts to crumble down. however, when you get the chance to travel back in time you decide to change your fate for the better but most importantly to get your revenge. What you don’t expect is to fall for your strict boss along the way.

⌁ pairing: ceo!taehyung x reader (f) , slight seokjin x reader

⌁ genre: ceo au, fantasy au, fluff, angst

⌁ coming soon: let me know if you wanna be tagged!

⌁ a/n: hi!! i’m so excited to announce my new tae fic. btw this is heavily inspired by the webtoon ‘marry my husband’ i absolutely loved the plot and wanted to write something similar for tae. i hope you are excited for it and if you have any questions or just wanna talk both my inbox and dms are open.

“Miss YN is there a particular reason for you to be staring at my crotch area right now?”

— @ sftykth .

#bts #taehyung imagines #taehyung x reader #taehyung #taehyung fanfic #taehyung fluff #taehyung masterlist #taehyung fanfiction #kim taehyung fanfic #kim taehyung x reader #taehyung x y/n #taehyung x you #kim taehyung smut #kim taehyung imagine #taehyung scenarios #taehyung fic recs #taehyung fantasy au #bts x y/n #bts x reader #bts x you #bts imagines #bts fanfction #bts masterlist #bts fanfic #bts taehyung #bts scenarios

[sftykth]

my ♡ masterlist .

— please do not repost, copy or translate my work on any platform. anyone found doing so will be reported.

✎ tba

✎ tba

✎ tba

✎ tba

✎ tba

perfect now.

꒰ sm au, f2l, fluff, slight angst, non-idol ꒱

— you have always been taehyungs innocent best friend, so when things take a turn he starts to realise that maybe you are not all that innocent. ♡

✎ tba

@ sftykth .

#taehyung imagines #taehyung x reader #bts masterlist #taehyung fanfiction #jungkook x reader #jimin x reader #yoongi x reader #seokjin x reader #hobi x reader #namjoon x reader #taehyung masterlist #taehyung fanfic #bts fanfction #bts x y/n #bts x reader #bts packs #bts sm au #bts smau #taehyung sm au #bts #taehyung #taehyung fluff #bts fanfic #taehyung fic recs #taehyung smut #jungkook masterlist #jungkook fanfic #jeon jungkook x reader #jungkook fluff #jungkook imagines

[sftykth]

꒰ notes about the author ꒱

— hi! i hope my page provides a safe space for you to join and interact with. my inbox and dms are open if you have any questions or just wanna talk! so don’t be afraid to reach out for anything.

here are some quick facts about me:

♡ i’m a capricorn, december baby.

♡ my mbti is isfp.

♡ my favourite genre to read or write is romance.

♡ i tend to get bored of things easily, so you may see my page layout always changing.

♡ my ult is bts but i’m a casual listener of some other groups.

♡ i’m a hopeless romantic so i crave for cliche moments.

— @ sftykth .

#profile #author #author notes #sftykth #bts #ask me things

[sftykth]

Loved Jimin in this fic 🥲🥲

he was a saviour 💜

#ask me things #perfect now

[sftykth]

part 32 ¥ together

༄ perfect now

— summary: you have always been taehyungs innocent best friend, so when things take a turn he starts to realise that maybe you are not all that innocent.

authors note: the end! 🥹 this feels so weird that the story is finished now ahh. i would really love to hear ur thoughts and opinions, have you enjoyed the story? do you have a favourite character? let me know anything i would love to talk:) look out for a new jungkook su which i’m preparing too!!

-masterlist-

•

tags: @n4mina @finelinememories @fertileleaf @yoongiigolden @angelarin @stopeatingwhales @devilsbooksworld @kimxhanbin131 @rjsmochii @pamzn @notvantaes @lovelytaes-blog @ellesalazar @arepabella @naturelvrgfstealer @pb-n-juju @yoonabeo @pinkish-rue @4vonly @fancycollectormoon @broken-glowsticks @iqraali @persyhange @wrmnssoul @rinkud @tinyoonsblog @taetaecatboy @davinashifts333 @laurademaury @madaboutjeon

[sftykth]

part 32 ¥ together

༄ perfect now

— summary: you have always been taehyungs innocent best friend, so when things take a turn he starts to realise that maybe you are not all that innocent.

authors note: the end! 🥹 this feels so weird that the story is finished now ahh. i would really love to hear ur thoughts and opinions, have you enjoyed the story? do you have a favourite character? let me know anything i would love to talk:) look out for a new jungkook su which i’m preparing too!!

-masterlist-

•

tags: @n4mina @finelinememories @fertileleaf @yoongiigolden @angelarin @stopeatingwhales @devilsbooksworld @kimxhanbin131 @rjsmochii @pamzn @notvantaes @lovelytaes-blog @ellesalazar @arepabella @naturelvrgfstealer @pb-n-juju @yoonabeo @pinkish-rue @4vonly @fancycollectormoon @broken-glowsticks @iqraali @persyhange @wrmnssoul @rinkud @tinyoonsblog @taetaecatboy @davinashifts333 @laurademaury @madaboutjeon

#perfect now #taehyung imagines #taehyung x reader #bts #taehyung #taehyung fanfic #bts x reader #taehyung fluff #bts masterlist #taehyung masterlist #taehyung sm au #taehyung smau #taehyung social media au #kim taehyung smut #taehyung scenarios #taehyung fic recs #kim taehyung fanfic #taehyung fake texts #kim taehyung x reader #taehyung fanfiction #bts x y/n #bts smau #bts social media au #bts sm au #bts fanfction #bts imagines #bts fake chat #bts scenarios

[sftykth]

part 31 ¥ i like you too

༄ perfect now

— summary: you have always been taehyungs innocent best friend, so when things take a turn he starts to realise that maybe you are not all that innocent.

authors note: guys we are close to the ending 🥹 how do we feel?? btw i’m going to be posting a new jungkook story i already posted the preview check it out and leave any feedback it would be appreciated it!

-masterlist-

•

tags: @n4mina @finelinememories @fertileleaf @yoongiigolden @angelarin @stopeatingwhales @devilsbooksworld @kimxhanbin131 @rjsmochii @pamzn @notvantaes @lovelytaes-blog @ellesalazar @arepabella @naturelvrgfstealer @pb-n-juju @yoonabeo @pinkish-rue @4vonly @fancycollectormoon @broken-glowsticks @iqraali @persyhange @wrmnssoul @rinkud @tinyoonsblog @taetaecatboy @davinashifts333 @laurademaury

[sftykth]

part 31 ¥ i like you too

༄ perfect now

— summary: you have always been taehyungs innocent best friend, so when things take a turn he starts to realise that maybe you are not all that innocent.

authors note: guys we are close to the ending 🥹 how do we feel?? btw i’m going to be posting a new jungkook story i already posted the preview check it out and leave any feedback it would be appreciated it!

-masterlist-

•

tags: @n4mina @finelinememories @fertileleaf @yoongiigolden @angelarin @stopeatingwhales @devilsbooksworld @kimxhanbin131 @rjsmochii @pamzn @notvantaes @lovelytaes-blog @ellesalazar @arepabella @naturelvrgfstealer @pb-n-juju @yoonabeo @pinkish-rue @4vonly @fancycollectormoon @broken-glowsticks @iqraali @persyhange @wrmnssoul @rinkud @tinyoonsblog @taetaecatboy @davinashifts333 @laurademaury

#perfect now #taehyung imagines #taehyung x reader #bts #taehyung #taehyung fanfic #bts x reader #taehyung fluff #bts masterlist #taehyung masterlist #taehyung fic recs #kim taehyung fanfic #taehyung fake texts #taehyung sm au #taehyung smau #taehyung social media au #kim taehyung x reader #kim taehyung smut #kim taehyung imagine #kim taehyung #bts x y/n #bts sm au #bts smau #bts social media au #bts fake chat #bts fanfction #bts imagines #bts taehyung #bts x you

[sftykth]

the top ten - JJK preview

banner done by me! ♡

↠ summary: A school who ranks their students based on beauty in the top ten program has Jungkook and his friends seen as the superior students amongst others. Jungkook takes a particular liking to a girl but will the social rank get in the way from something blossoming between the two?

↠ pairing: Jungkook x Yn

↠ type: e2l - inspired by the girl from nowhere

↠ Coming soon !! Let me know if you want to be tagged !!

authors note: hello everyone! you might recognise me if you read my first story ‘perfect now’ i’m excited to announce that i will be writing a new jungkook story im so excited! i still haven’t decided whether to do it as a sm au or a writing type. it will become more clearer later on. pls let me know ur thoughts and if ur excited to read this !! <33

#jeon jungkook x reader #jungkook x reader #jungkook #jungkook imagines #jungkook fake texts #jungkook fluff #jungkook fanfic #jungkook masterlist #jungkook series #jungkook social media au #jungkook smau #bts x y/n #bts fanfction #bts masterlist #bts x reader #bts fake chat #bts smau #bts sm au #bts social media au #jungkook fantasy au #jungkook fic recs #jungkook e2l #jungkook smut #bts imagines #bts jungkook #jungkook scenarios

[sftykth]

part 30 ¥ lets meet

༄ perfect now

— summary: you have always been taehyungs innocent best friend, so when things take a turn he starts to realise that maybe you are not all that innocent.

authors note: oh god she’s finally gonna talk w both of them.. we shall see how that goes 👀

-masterlist-

•

tags: @n4mina @finelinememories @fertileleaf @yoongiigolden @angelarin @stopeatingwhales @devilsbooksworld @kimxhanbin131 @rjsmochii @pamzn @notvantaes @lovelytaes-blog @ellesalazar @arepabella @naturelvrgfstealer @pb-n-juju @yoonabeo @pinkish-rue @4vonly @fancycollectormoon @broken-glowsticks @iqraali @persyhange @wrmnssoul @rinkud @tinyoonsblog @taetaecatboy @davinashifts333 @laurademaury

[sftykth]

part 30 ¥ lets meet

༄ perfect now

— summary: you have always been taehyungs innocent best friend, so when things take a turn he starts to realise that maybe you are not all that innocent.

authors note: oh god she’s finally gonna talk w both of them.. we shall see how that goes 👀

-masterlist-

•

tags: @n4mina @finelinememories @fertileleaf @yoongiigolden @angelarin @stopeatingwhales @devilsbooksworld @kimxhanbin131 @rjsmochii @pamzn @notvantaes @lovelytaes-blog @ellesalazar @arepabella @naturelvrgfstealer @pb-n-juju @yoonabeo @pinkish-rue @4vonly @fancycollectormoon @broken-glowsticks @iqraali @persyhange @wrmnssoul @rinkud @tinyoonsblog @taetaecatboy @davinashifts333 @laurademaury

#perfect now #taehyung imagines #taehyung x reader #taehyung #bts #taehyung fanfic #bts x reader #taehyung fluff #bts masterlist #taehyung scenarios #taehyung fic recs #kim taehyung x reader #taehyung x y/n #taehyung masterlist #kim taehyung fanfic #taehyung sm au #taehyung smau #taehyung social media au #bts x y/n #bts fanfction #bts fake chat #bts sm au #bts smau #bts social media au #bts fake scenarios #kim taehyung smut #kim taehyung imagine #taehyung smut

[sftykth]

Would it be ok with me asking for a imagine of one of the boys with “Love you Goodbye” by 1D?!?

hiya currently not taking requests as i’m still writing a fic. but maybe !!

#ask me things

[sftykth]

part 29 ¥ talk it out

༄ perfect now

— summary: you have always been taehyungs innocent best friend, so when things take a turn he starts to realise that maybe you are not all that innocent.

authors note: will yn finally confess back to tae👀 pls leave any comments about the story or ur opinions on the characters it really does motivate me to continue on writing the story when i see people are enjoying it 🥺

-masterlist-

•

tags: @n4mina @finelinememories @fertileleaf @yoongiigolden @angelarin @stopeatingwhales @devilsbooksworld @kimxhanbin131 @rjsmochii @pamzn @notvantaes @lovelytaes-blog @ellesalazar @arepabella @naturelvrgfstealer @pb-n-juju @yoonabeo @pinkish-rue @4vonly @fancycollectormoon @broken-glowsticks @iqraali @persyhange @wrmnssoul @rinkud @tinyoonsblog @taetaecatboy @davinashifts333 @laurademaury