shwarmadillo

[shwarmadillo]

The last time we were on a long flight, my wife and I invented a game we call "Little Guy."

You start a game of Little Guy by saying, "I'm gonna hand you a little guy." The little guy is some kind of baby animal you are imagining. "Oh," she might say in response, "Okay," and hold out her hands for it. I will then mime handing her the animal. This provides some clues as to the little guy's size, weight, and general ungainliness.

She then gets to ask questions about what kind of little guy this is, BUT NO QUESTIONS ABOUT HIS ACTUAL APPEARANCE OR SPECIES ARE ALLOWED. Qualitative questions, or questions about his behavior, are the only ones permitted. She can ask "Is he soft?" or "Does he seem nervous about being held?" or "If I put him in the bathtub, does he seem okay with that?" or "Would he like a lil grape?" or "Is he the sort of little fellow who would wear a vest in a children's book?" but not "Does he have fur," "Is he a reptile," "Is he from Asia," etc. Some questions are in a grey area so you have to follow your heart, but the point is not to identify the animal as fast as possible: the point is to guess the animal purely based on vibes + how he would act if he were in your living room right now.

And I'm not limited to yes or no answers! If she asks, "Would it feel appropriate to see this little guy in a propeller hat?" I can reply, "Oh no, he has a gravity to him. A bowler hat would be a more appropriate hat." Or if she asks, "Does this little guy have protagonist energy?" I can say something like, "he probably wouldn't be the main character in a children's cartoon. He'd probably be the main character's ditzy best friend who's always eating sandwiches, or something."

We're big Twenty Questions to kill time in a waiting room people, but Little Guy is more about the journey than the destination. It's got a different kind of sauce that's nice if "killing time" and "lowering anxiety" need to happen hand in hand.

[shwarmadillo]

props to this week’s guy for having perhaps the best reaction to the Horrors ever: “i may have incomprehensible trauma now but I’m going to sue you for all you’re worth”

#truly devastated that it didn’t work #tmagp spoilers #livegreaction

[shwarmadillo]

i still think gwen and alice should fuck

#gotta put this out into the universe every few episodes until i am either vindicated or sam gets his shit together #tmagp spoilers

[shwarmadillo]

god poor alice. she’s trying so hard to just do her job a cog in the machine and all her idiot coworkers keep having Thoughts and Conspiracies

#I’m also not convinced she doesn’t actually know WAY more than she’s letting on #tmagp spoilers #livegreaction

[shwarmadillo]

uhhhhh so how about the little bit of static / glitch when sam said “no” re: hypothetical conspiracy email

#either it’s a reaction to lying or our local computer ghosts are having some emotional reactions to certain things #tmagp spoilers #livegreaction

[shwarmadillo]

“we don’t always get what we want do we” alice babygirl :(((((((((((

#i need sam and alice’s ex background bc this is hurting my heart rn :((( #tmagp spoilers #livegreaction

[shwarmadillo]

“you know it’s rude to have absolutely no game” alice marry me i beg of you

#tmagp spoilers #livegreaction

[shwarmadillo]

honestly craziest part of this reveal is that fetuses now canonically have souls in the jjk-verse. pro-life kaisen.

#cannot stop cackling the implications are so funny #jjk #jjk spoilers #jjk manga spoilers #story time is boring time

[shwarmadillo]

ink5oul: avatar of the influencer

#tmagp

[shwarmadillo]

rb to relieve the back pain of the person u reblogged this from

[shwarmadillo]

Sometimes I feel I've got to

Run away

[shwarmadillo]

[shwarmadillo]

For those that are going to miss the eclipse on Monday, I have created a simulation of what the eclipse will look like along the path of totality

[shwarmadillo]

Anthony Machuca · “Forbidden knowledge”

[shwarmadillo]

for april fools we’re deleting this entire site sayonara you weeaboo shits

#classic

[shwarmadillo]

so now we need a handjob button right

[shwarmadillo]