skyexrose

[skyexrose]

I never openly and publicly voiced out my issues with anxiety and panic attacks, and even doing it now makes me freak out, but I know the more people speak about these things the easier it becomes to talk about them. I feel the fear of talking about it is not only due to the general taboo society puts on mental health, as if feeling what and how you feel makes you mental, or to the fear of opening up about your vulnerability. Rather I feel the biggest block comes from acknowledging there is just no words or way to explain. There is no way to explain how I feel the ground falling under my feet, there is no way to explain how I feel my chest eating itself up, there is no way to explain how I am suddenly running out of breath, how my heartbeat is going so fast of all a sudden and I fear having a heart attack, how for however long it takes I feel everything crumbling and me losing control completely. Of my senses, of my body, of my thoughts. So no, even when people try to help, I can't just not feel that. I can't just stop. Because I am paralysed. And at the end it's always only me having to remind myself I survived this wave once, I will survive it again. That this wave too will pass. That it will stop. That it will be better again. It is lonesome and necessary at the same time. And even though I feel I became better at managing it with time, I still feel there is no easy way out. The only way out is through, and sometimes the wave is really big and really dark, and going through it feels like an eternity. So if that's where you are at, I just want you to know you are not alone, you can voice it out, and you will get through it.

#you are not alone #p

[skyexrose]

The feminine urge to quit the social media world permanently, to delete all possible information about my existence to the point that everyone would question themselves if I really stepped my foot on the land of earth, if I really existed, and I would just live quietly and become private for the rest of my life.

#p

[skyexrose]

One deep talk and apology can fix a lot of things but people ain't mature enough for that.

#quote #quotes #personal text #text text text #text tumblr #text conversation #text quote #texts from last night #my text #text post #text #text tag #spilled words #spilled ink #spilled thoughts #spilled writing #spilled tears #spilled truth #spilled feelings #spilled guts #spilled secrets #spilled heart #spilled emotions #spilled quotes #spilled work #spilled everything #spilled ideas #spilled in writing #spilled in words #spilled pages

[skyexrose]

I think i'm good naman super busy lang and kagaya mo napapa overthink din nitong mga nakakaraan -C

Medyo in between kasi eh, pero that's life. Di naman pwedeng palaging okey.

[skyexrose]

I wanna know your past not to judge you, but for me to be able to know how you needed to be loved.

#forhim #for him #for her #personal text #text text text #text tumblr #text quote #text conversation #texts from last night #my text #text post #text #text tag #spilled truth #spilled feelings #spilled heart #spilled guts #spilled words #spilled ink #spilled thoughts #spilled writing #spilled emotions #love quote #love quotes #i still love you #lovely #i love you #love language #love #lovers

[skyexrose]

It's crazy how much I’m struggling to stay alive at the moment and no one even knows it.

#p

[skyexrose]

You're early again? -C

Nope, di pa ko natulog non eh hahaha! Ewan ko kung okey lang ako or overthink lang malala. Ikaw ba kumusta?

[skyexrose]

I m unable to msg u??😭

Wdym? 😅

[skyexrose]

What if I was never the one for you, and I only came to your life as a distraction.

#p #pain #hurting

[skyexrose]

“I took the image of a burning woman into my heart. I didn’t hate the fire. I hated the people who did not believe her.”

— Lidia Yuknavitch, from “The Chronology of Water: A Memoir,” wr. c. 2011

[skyexrose]

happy birthday to the boy who does not adore me. i hope your day is as poetic as the words that i would have written for you, as transcendent as the playlists i would have comprised for you and as heartfelt as the art i would have created for you.

[skyexrose]

I could hear 500 negative things about you and still be your friend. The only person who can change my mind is you.

#text #text post #text quote #my text #texts from last night #txt post #my post #my writings #my life #my writing #negative #change #mindset #mind control #thought #thoughts #sad thoughts #alone with my thoughts #thinking #inner thoughts #spilled words #spilled thoughts #spilled ink #spilled writing #spread the word #spilled tears #spilled truth #spilled feelings #spilled emotions #spilled heart

[skyexrose]

Star Stroll ⭐✨🌟

Just my usual obsession with translucent dresses haha

[skyexrose]

How my heart sounded forcing myself to walk away from someone I so badly wanted to keep in my life.

#forhim #personal text #text text text #text tumblr #text conversation #text quote #my text #text post #text #text tag #texts from last night #spilled tears #spilled guts #spilled secrets #spilled truth #spilled emotions #spilled feelings #spilled heart #spilled words #spilled ink #spilled thoughts #spilled writing #love quotes #love quote #quotes #hurtquotes #hurting #hurt #hurtful #im hurtin

[skyexrose]

I guess the reason I got so attached to you is because you were my first time in so many things. You were the reason I wished the days would go by faster to see you again. You were the first person I never wanted to stop talking to, and you were the first person I wanted romantically.

#forhim #for him #for her #personal text #text text text #text tumblr #text conversation #text quote #texts from last night #my text #text post #text tag #text #spilled truth #spilled tears #spilled guts #spilled feelings #spilled secrets #spilled heart #spilled words #spilled thoughts #spilled ink #spilled writing #spilled emotions #attachment issues #attatchment #love quote #love quotes #love #love language

[skyexrose]

It's okay, I didn't know how to love you right either. The only difference is that while you gave up, I never wanted to stop trying to learn how.

#forhim #for him #for her #personal text #text text text #text tumblr #text conversation #text quote #texts from last night #my text #text post #text #text tag #spilled tears #spilled guts #spilled secrets #spilled truth #spilled feelings #spilled heart #spilled words #spilled thoughts #spilled ink #spilled writing #spilled emotions #love quote #love quotes #hurt #hurtquotes #hurting #im hurtin

[skyexrose]

So you graduated with a business degree po pala. I'm assuming that maybe I can learn a lot from you when it comes to managing a business since the program that I have taken in college is very much not related to what I'm doing right now. 😅

-C

Yes, maybe at some point maka help rin ako sayo and ikaw rin maka help sakin to gain some experiences and ideas. For now I work sa hospital, not corporate pero mahirap rin mag manage specially today. Too many issues ngayong araw na to. Medyo stressful rin sa ibang ka work. Madami rin reports and complains at medyo sumasakit rin ulo ko kahit di ako ang head, what more pa yung mga big boss sa taas na nag meeting ngayon. 🥲