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i'm gonna say something bold

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hey at least the weather's been nice (spontaneously combusts

#melonposting #how am i supposed to sleep? do homework?? #how dare i be both nervous and principled. good god /silly

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like what do i do with my frustration???? sure, i want to write an annotated bibliography for my research project on art and autism, but god i feel like exploding. and exploding isn't really conducive to writing an annotated bibliography, sadly

#melonposting #grrragh. gagh

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#:)

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It makes me happy when they listen

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"Are you ok?" I'm actually tired bro. From the bottom of my heart I'm tired

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i think the main issue in arguing with zionists is that, well, they believe in zionism! if israel did deserve to exist, then the genocide and injustice in palestine could be argued for (not like it should be, but it certainly could) -- and zionists believe israel deserves to exist.

i, unfortunately, have a large amount of experience interacting (personally) with zionism and zionists. most of those i've talked to feel for the palestinians, and the violence they are facing, but they fail to realize (or they staunchly deny) the very, very active part israel and the IDF have had in that -- and how it's representative of what the nation has always done.

at the same time, they focus more on israeli hostages than palestinian ones -- and i know, of course, that these zionist jews i've interacted with are either israeli or have loved ones in israel, and so have a very personal stake in the safety of israeli hostages (which may very well be friends or family members), but i find it strange how much emphasis they put on hamas' cruelty in taking hostages while the IDF is doing the same thing (in essence; the exact details of who's doing it worse are important to note, but not relevant right now, because folks should realize that their side is being at least as cruel as the enemy's).

recently i was drawn into an argument with an israeli zionist (who, unfortunately, is very close to the action and tragedy by being israeli), and she was incredibly offended by my anti-zionism and my opposition to israel's abject cruelty to palestinian citizens, as it seemed (to her) like i was bypassing the cruelty hamas has enacted on israeli citizens -- which is very telling. i've noticed that we as jews have the tendency, whatever the situation may be, of focusing more on our pain than the pain of others, even if we are the ones hurting them. that person has every reason to be scared and hurt, and i'd be lying if i said her response wasn't at least somewhat sympathetic, but her pain in this horrible, violent conflict does not invalidate the pain on the other side. jews, throughout this recent crisis, have consistently not talked in depth about the constant losses in palestine -- am i suddenly being callous by focusing on those losses, and not our own? (YOUR PAIN AND THEIRS AREN'T MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE, YOU DOLT! sorry...)

because it all comes down to believing in israel! my mom has always told me about how beautiful it is there, about her time living on a kibbutz... and sure, it might be nice. i can't argue with that. but why is it that our nationalism for israel is so strong, so virulent? i have not seen patriots as loyal for any other country. and when you criticize israel, israelis feel like you're criticizing their entire existence -- and many non-israeli jews do, as well. because zionism has been built so deep into the modern religion! it's made to be a necessary piece! belief in it is the default!

and, from the inside looking in, i can't be surprised that many jews take anti-zionism as being antisemitic -- because, to them, israel and zionism stand as the pinnacle of safety and support for the jewish people. it is impossible to argue with them about anything above that base layer, as the base layer itself serves as a foundation: so long as a jew thinks that israel is right, deserved, and necessary, no proof will sway them into hating israel. it's just impossible, and that's very frustrating.

for me in particular, i find it very frustrating, as this single idea has turned so many people i know to support a genocidal entity. they believe in and support israel, so they stand with it now -- even if they condemn its current actions, they neglect how those actions are just an extension of its inherent existence -- whether they think israel's doing the right thing or wrong thing right now, they don't really care at the end of the day, because israel, to them, is necessary in keeping the jewish people alive. they stand with it, thinking that jews can only stand at all if they do.

but a genocidal crutch is no crutch at all: it only breaks us more. zionist jews make me so mad, and the worst part is that i could never express that to them in a way they'll understand.

#melonposting #anti-zionism #israel #i am so madddd and frustrated and stressed #with the whole camp thing going on my parents will inevitably find out (and soon!) that i'm anti-zionist #and given their age and proximity -- they're so deeply entrenched in zionism that i can't even hope to sway them #it's so sad and scary (i don't want them to be mad at me -- even though that really isn't the important thing here) #but it's also philosophically bizarre... like these people have good principles! #it's just this one tiny stupid thing (believing in israel) that's effectively turned them into bad people! #<- it's weird saying something like that. because i don't think they're bad people. but they're zionist. #part of it is that they're my parents and i love them but also... they're so good otherwise. a single thing went wrong. #(okay well not a single thing but it's generally minute things y'know?) #i don't wanna hate my parents. and i don't want them to hate me. can they please for the love of god stop #(takes every jew i know by the shoulders and shakes them back and forth) PLEAAAASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOPPPPPPP #anyway it's very hard for me to do work because i have this on my mind. #how do i break it to my parents that 1. i won't be working at camp this summer and 2. it's because i hate zionism? #i'm not cut out for situations like these ughhhhh why did i have to post that stupid anti-zionist instagram story in march #i could've just chosen not to take the job on my own accord and have enough time to come up with an excuse for my parents #whatever. too late for that. i dug my grave and now must lie in it #i guess it's character-building?? :')

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Shaun Tan (Chinese-Australian, b. 1974, Perth, Australia) - The Quiet Town, 2021, Paintings: Oil on Canvas

#there's always been something haunting to me about large black animal silhouettes (i could not for the life of me say why) #so i find this particularly intriguing

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im a blorbo apologist but also they did every bad thing they did and i will get mad if u ignore that. complexities

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Remember that the calls for the national guard to intervene are calls to use state violence against Palestinian, Jewish, Arab, Muslim and other pro-Palestine students. They’re calling for deadly violence against Jews in the name of “anti-antisemitism.”

#you know people don't really care about jews when they only 'care about jews' if it's an excuse to support a genocide #it's bad enough for jews to be zionist for the sake of jews but goys being zionist for the sake of jews is just baffling to me #i'm very glad there were so many jews at the protest. incredibly proud of my siblings for standing up for what's right <3

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Made the worst brownies ever created just now

#as someone who loves brownies for the corners: i would eat that #also hi guys i'm back

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hello fellow autistic lesbians 🌈💜

#!!!!!!!!! #fav

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You have to recognize your capacity for harm. You cannot omit the harm you've done to others to remain "good." Anybody can be a bigot. Anyone can be an abuser. Anyone can harm anyone at any time even those who have been harmed themselves. The world is not made up of victims and villains only, this is life, not a Saturday morning cartoon and you are a human being who can or maybe even has hurt others and you HAVE to acknowledge that to learn to be better.

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#yaya i love fuzzy dice

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happy passover!! i'll be afk for a good portion of this week... and so will all of our bread!!!

#dandy's doodles #the human object singularity #thos loaf #<- it's loaf!!! guys it's loaf #(soft-launching one of my characters. hehe) #happyyyyyyyy passover

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happy lesbian visibility week

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i think smiley is a shapeshifting dragon who just often takes a caterpillar form... yellow + gold + rainbow! :)

#dandy's doodles #fursona #dragon #smiley the caterpillar #smiley the dragon #any given animal smiley/i turn into for a given situation is yellow and gold! #and fluffy ideally... #so for a cat i'd be golden maine coon... y'know... #the rainbow would be some kind of accessory unless it can be well-integrated into the animal itself #like if it were a warrior cats sona or a bluey sona the animal would have to be realistic color-wise #speaking of which - i really need to make a bluey sona!!