sparkkeyper

[sparkkeyper]

that muppet post reminded me, most if not all of the main muppets have twitter pages. Fav has gotta be Miss Piggys, which is filled with selfies and vaguely uplifting text thats also egocentric. all the comments are people complimenting her and being like “YAS QUEEN”

Close second is Gonzos. Which is just…unhinged

#Good i love gonzo so much #gonzo the great #Muppets

[sparkkeyper]

Season 4, Episode 6 “Window of Opportunity” STARGATE SG-1 (1997–2007)

#stargate sg1 #window of opportunity #jack o'neill #the classic #3 fries short of a happy meal

[sparkkeyper]

I saw this fiasco while I was out in public, on a distant muted TV showing a news network, and my first automatic thought was "That looks like Dashcon all over again." Then I thought "nah, few things are as terrible as Dashcon." Then I watched the muted, captioned news broadcast for another minute and realized "oh my god, is IS Dashcon again."

I hope this girl gets positive publicity out of this horseshit and that everyone involved gets refunded/paid like they're supposed to, holy cow.

The side of her the media won’t show you

#Dashcon but wonka #Sad oompa loompa #I worked in WDW for so long this PISSES ME OFF

[sparkkeyper]

jim henson, frank oz & don sahlin showing off how to make various characters with a “whatnot/anything” muppet, 1969

#muppets #jim henson #Yooo this is cool

[sparkkeyper]

hold on a fucking second. delaware is a state?? i thought it was a river? or is the river more important than the state? why don't i know this? (i should mention i don't like in america, i'm just confused)

there is delaware (state) and delaware (river) 

both are equally strange

the state is a tiny little cryptid thing

the rive is a monster that spans new york, pennsylvania, new jersey and delaware. also washington crossed it once and that was like kinda a big deal i guess. like crossing the rubicon in rome.

the state tries to me more important with its “im the first state!!!” bs (seriously its even on the fucking license plates) but we all know. its the river.

#What the fuck #Delaware

[sparkkeyper]

I’m imagining just like, the most banal AU. just life. just an Aziraphale who is an insomniac and a Crowley who works the graveyard shift most days of the week so he can’t sleep except during the day, even on his days off. and their lives overlap at the launderette. and maybe it’s summer and it rains a lot and they always go at around midnight to the same Nite Owl launderette with the neon sign all lit up and the cheeky looking owl on the glass in the front window. 

they set up, always, opposite each other and there is on occasion the elderly shift manager in the middle between them on a little folding chair. he grumbles about damn kids awake at all hours and shakes his head a lot. he falls asleep most nights so it means that the music coming through the tinny speakers in the ceiling is quiet and set always to the top tunes of the 60s. Everyday by Buddy Holly and The End of the World by Skeeter Davis and I’ve Been Loving You Too Long by Otis Redding.

it starts up small at first, just some glances at the only other person doing laundry at midnight on a most unexceptional Tuesday. Aziraphale wonders about why the only other patron wears sunglasses, although, (and he’ll look up at the fluorescent lights and wince) perhaps he has a point. it’ll start with watching Crowley wrestle with a vending machine and doing a very thorough job of cursing it out for eating his coins. it’ll really start with Crowley opening the door for Aziraphale one night, as he struggles it open one-handed, arms full of a blanket in the most hideous shade of beige he can imagine. 

Aziraphale will say thanks, breathlessly, and take one of the machines for bulky-items next to Crowley’s usual spot. 

there will be might I borrow some detergent? and more let me get the door for you moments. there will be forgotten coins and the two of them looking beneath the machines for any that had fallen from previous patrons. there will be singular red socks ruining an entire set of white towels (they’re just slightly pink. pink is okay. pink suits you). there will be a fluorescent light flickering over Aziraphale’s head across the launderette and making the white of his hair look like a halo.

there will be, eventually, Times They Are A-Changing by Bob Dylan playing on the tinny speakers and the shift manager snoring in his plastic fold-up chair and Aziraphale sitting next to Crowley on the wooden bench, circles beneath his eyes and exhaustion in his shoulders. he’ll eventually lie down on the bench and Crowley will slide his denim jacket beneath his cheek, because the pink towels are still in the dryer. 

he’ll stay there all night. long past the time that the towels are dry and the laundry has been folded. he’ll stay there until the sun breaks up over the horizon and filters through the dirty windows, until Aziraphale wakes up and frets over the creases he has left in the denim jacket. 

don’t worry about it.

I am. I know you hate wrinkles.

I’ll let you make it up to me, then.

how?

by letting me buy you breakfast. 

and if the next time the shift manager sees them, back at the Nite Owl launderette on an unexceptional Tuesday with only one laundry basket between them, he decides to say nothing about it at all.

#I couldn't sleep so I went searching for this post at 2am #At least two or three years after I first read it #Aziraphale #Crowley #Good omens #Laundromat au

[sparkkeyper]

every time i ask people if they do any new years resolutions its all ooooo i dont like making them bc i fail or ohhhhh no i couldnt keep up wiht that and then when they ask me and i tell them about Pasta Quest (i am eating as many different pasta shapes as possible in the space of a year) or when i did Fruit Adventures (every time i saw a fruit i had never eaten before id get one and eat it and read the wikipedia article about it) theyre like hang on i forgot you can make Fun Ones i want a fun one

#You know what fuck it #I'm gonna resolve to get not just one but TWO massages this year #Or even more if the opportunity arises and I'm feeling crazy #And I'm gonna take a weekend and road trip somewhere #By myself and not tell anybody

[sparkkeyper]

#Me irl #good omens #gos3 #I need angst with a happy ending #I can't do perma-sad ok?

[sparkkeyper]

Me: *slinking back into Tumblr every few months to see if the Good Omens fandom is talking about literally anything other than The Divorce* "???"

Fandom: "No."

Me: "'Kay." *slinks back out again*

#good omens #good omens season 2 #I'm just so tired of it #I hate it so much #I'm normally an angst goblin but everything surrounding the divorce just felt Done Wrong #Spark rants in the tags

[sparkkeyper]

Happy anniversary to the time I ordered a burrito from taco bell and instead they gave me like 100$ worth of THC vape cartridges.

#Wtf #Taco Bell gone wrong #Amazing

[sparkkeyper]

Be careful of Asexuals y'all, I heard they aren't fucking around

#Lol #asexuality

[sparkkeyper]

Been working on this for a while and if I don't post it now I never will so here you go <3 enjoy the most self-indulgent thing I've ever spent time on - I just really needed them to hug...

#Good omens #Good omens 2 #The most awkward hug in the history of the universe #Awwwww #*melts* lol #Good omens jane austen

[sparkkeyper]

Chekhov's Contract

Back again for Day 3 of the Nice and Accurate Prophecies event.

How Will Our Hero Cope?

Today, we let's talk about Crowley. Within the span of a few hours, Crowley has gone to Heaven and learned of another plotted End of the World, watched the closest thing he has to an archnemesis (Gabriel) run off with his demon love of a meager four years and suffer no consequences for it, and left his heart shattered on the floor of the bookshop as the love of his life chooses a job promotion over him. He's not doing great. So what is in store for Crowley in Season 3?

It's honestly hard to predict because there is just so much open space to play with. He could do anything and not one of us would be surprised.

Sleep for a century? There's precedent. Get extremely drunk for weeks on end? That's on brand. Go tit for tat and take a leadership position in Hell just to cancel out Aziraphale in Heaven? Seems unlikely, but I also wouldn't be surprised at that level of petty lashing out.

But I did find one thing. At least, I think I did.

There was, I have now convinced myself, a Chekhov's Gun in Season 2 that I haven't seen anyone talking about. (Apologies if you're out there screaming and I just haven't seen it. I did try searching!)

When Beelzebub kidnaps Crowley from the Bentley and takes him to Hell to discuss the Gabriel situation, they make an offer to Crowley that Crowley later accepts. And what is that?

Find Gabriel for me and you can have whatever your nasty little heart desires.

And what does Crowley do in Episode 6? Finds the writing on the box that tells everyone Gabriel is in the fly. He finds Gabriel for Beelzebub.

Just to emphasize that again - Crowley fulfills his side of a verbal contract forged with the Grand Duke of Hell.

He's now owed whatever his heart desires. And as we've seen, Heaven and Hell operate like businesses. Contracts must be fulfilled. (Excuse me while my little lawyer-nerd heart sings over here.)

And we also know that he's aware that Heaven has plans for Armageddon 2.0.

Where he would absolutely deserve to wallow after all the utter bullshit drama he's gone through, I don't believe that's Crowley (no matter how much fun it makes to write in fanfiction). Crowley isn't just going to sit back and watch the world burn.

In the past, when Crowley has wanted to run away, it's only ever been with Aziraphale. Sure, he threatens he's going to head to Alpha Centauri even when Actually rejects the offer, but he doesn't do it.

And now? Running away with Aziraphale isn't an option because he's gone.

Crowley has nothing left to lose. So he's going to throw his entire self into saving the world, with reckless disregard for his own safety.

And he's going to have a blank check from Hell to do it.

#See there's all these possible Chekhov's guns in s2 #But after the shit handling of s2 I don't have any faith left that the writers of s3 will fire any one of them #Like...this concept? I'd love to see it #Happy to be proven wrong but 100% expecting all these cool plot options to be utterly forgotten #Like almost all the internal Chekhov's guns of s2 were #good omens #Good omens 2 #good omens 2 spoilers #Spark rants in the tags

[sparkkeyper]

This puts into words the huge problem I be with that opening scene. As cute as it is to see angel!Crowley creating nebulas and see the types of things that pushed him to question and Fall, it changes Aziraphale's character so much. Just looking at S1, Aziraphale tried so hard to be a 'good' angel and yet from the beginning he is different. He's open, he's willing to chat with a demon as long as the demon isn't actively attacking him. Heck, he's willing to CONFIDE in a demon about how worried he is about doing the wrong thing.

But from a S2 lense, he's allowing a previous acquaintance to dare talk to him again after joining the Wrong Side. And very possibly just because he was kinda smitten with that acquaintance originally. They have history already, and it's honestly not good history: history in which Aziraphale dashed Crowley's hopes for his creation's future and in which Crowley dragged up rebellious ideas Aziraphale didn't want to acknowledge.

In S1 Aziraphale shelters a random enemy from the new rain of his own initiative. He is kind for the sake of being kind, even to demons, because it doesn't occur to him to be anything else. And that sets him apart from the Archangels even from the start. But from an S2 standpoint he's paying back a debt. Sure, he's noble enough to pay it back even to a demon, but it's not his unique choice anymore.

If we accept S2, we have to admit that with Aziraphale in Eden we're seeing kindness reflected, not kindness born from within. And I think that really hurts Aziraphale's character.

As cute as I found the opening scene to season 2 I just haaate how much it changes the background to their relationship. Like the whole point is that they are friends despite being "hereditary enemies". They showed each other kindness in Eden when they were absolutely not supposed to. Making it so that they knew each other before implies that Aziraphale only engaged in conversation with Crowley because he remembered him as an angel, only sheltered him from the rain to return a favour, and harboured the belief for 6000 years that Crowley would be more acceptable, more lovable if he were to return to his angelic state. It just wrecks a key part of their companionship and affection for one another that was so important to the story.

#I hope y'all aren't expecting any enthusiastic meta from me this time around #I don't have any for s2 #So many things about s2 just ruin the existing GO experience for me #And I'm not just taking about the Final Fifteen #It genuinely kills my enjoyment of s1 and the book #I feel like Aziraphale in particular had his character warped from what it was and it baffles me that everybody jumped to praise this season #Again I'm not even counting the Final Fifteen though that's an example #Tldr s1 only in this house #Spark rants in the tags #Good omens 2 #good omens 2 spoilers

[sparkkeyper]

Writing prompt? No. Writing much delayed.

#Me #writing

[sparkkeyper]

Tired of dumbass nihilist shit. Been there done that Everything matters actually. Like just factually every god damn thing effects Something even if it's not anything huge or obvious. Things cannot exist without having any impact on anything else

#Inspirational?

[sparkkeyper]

i need aziraphale to go hog wild in s3. i need him to explode with rage and eyes glow. i need crowley to be threatened so aziraphale’s repressed anger and emotions will finally boil over. i need michael sheen to pull on his badass intimidating boots and show how even the kindest people are still capable and deadly and not to be taken advantage of. i need—

#Please give me that #If only to make up for the horseshit that was s2's character motivations #Good omens 2 #Good omens 2 spoilers #Kinda #good omens 3 speculation