sparkling1duck

[sparkling1duck]

Go-gurt-ation

Guard: Here uh... you guys should drink this... trust me, it'll help.

Justin: I'll take it, I take it.

Griffin: Oh! Ok. Eager beaver.

Taako: I hope this is go-gurt.

Guard: Well it's not... it's brandy...

Justin: Well I tried it and it is go-gurt.

Griffin: No! It's brandy!

Travis: Roll for go-gurt!

Justin: It's a character choice I'm making! It's definitely go-gurt!

Griffin: No, ok a flask is not a character choice

Travis: Taako just tastes go-gurt whenever he drinks libations.

Griffin: Fine everything Taako drinks just magically transmogrifies... that was the first spell Taako ever cast and now it's a terrible curse.

Justin: And I can't get it off! -laughing-

Clint: Go-gurt-ation!

Taako: Oh it tastes like go-gurt darling!

Griffin: It's a Sisyphean curse. He thought everything was going to be a 24/7 go-gurt party but no he's got like MAD scurvy.

Taako: Oh no I don't because it's KEY LIME go-gurt so that's fine.

Clint: Read a book Griffin.

Taako: On the scurvy front, I'm good. Read a book.

[sparkling1duck]

IT HAS TO BE AMETHYST.

[sparkling1duck]

my favorite headline so far for this game is “Untitled Goose Game Lets You Revel in Being a Small-Town Asshole”

[sparkling1duck]

how in the world was the last airbender given 6.8 times the amount of money than the amount offered to the literal lungs of the earth.

the fact that the heads of entire nations don’t care enough to offer actually valuable help is so infuriating.

if the deforestation of the Amazon continues, we are all doomed. our home is doomed.

[sparkling1duck]

[sparkling1duck]

Think Pastel Pink

[sparkling1duck]

today a kid at work climbing up a tree felt the need to tell his friend “this tree is for ONLY BOYS and GIRLS”. so obviously his friend was like um that means it’s for everyone, to which i responded “some people aren’t boys or girls!” and the boy climbing the branch added his hot take of “YEAH! some people are PIRATES.”

[sparkling1duck]

i want to run away…but like in ghibli movie. like i take a block of cheese a loaf of bread and some apples and wander through the flower-specked mountains wrapped up in a shawl and i happen to wander into a moving castle and fall in love with a cute wizard

[sparkling1duck]

[sparkling1duck]

caterpillars have more muscles than humans but i’d like to see one try to fight me irl and see what happens

[sparkling1duck]

[sparkling1duck]

do you guys eat your burrito with or without the foil?

[sparkling1duck]

Bards are too powerful. They can learn mass suggestion. All they have to do is yell “Everybody  clap your hands!” and make up to 12 people do the Cha Cha slid for 24 hours 

[sparkling1duck]

regret.mp4

[sparkling1duck]

I die a little inside every time someone says history is boring. History is one long, epic adventure with battles to be fought, royal scandals to be gossiped about, human rights to be protected. It can be comic and tragic, and it exhibits both the very best and the very worst of human nature. History is all about seemingly ordinary people doing extraordinary things, and that is why we all want to be remembered by it.

[sparkling1duck]

Hands down my favorite part of Night At The Museum is that it’s low key the plot of The Mummy (1999) but like, chill.

[sparkling1duck]

If there was a way to run SUPER MEGA AD BLOCKER on this website I fucking would