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strnza · 2 days
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just  came  to  realize  that  that’s  a  year  or  two  less  than  half  my  life  come  this  summer  🤍  feeling  totally  normal  about  that  🤍
i  will  have  written  eliza  for  12  years  come  this  august.
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strnza · 3 days
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like  /  reply  for  a  minimum  one-liner,  maximum  one  paragraph  starter!  🤍
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strnza · 3 days
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yalls  muses  do  realize  that  half  of  being  in  eliza’s  life  /  loving  eliza  is  just  …  keeping  her  alive,  right?  v  much  akin  to  turning  your  back  on  a  3  yr  old  learning  to  ride  a  scooter  and  turning  around  to  see  them  with  skinned  knees,  elbows,  face  &  somehow  missing  a  tooth.  that  is  loving  eliza.
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strnza · 3 days
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her  previous  words  held  no  malice,  judgment  or  cruelty  -  it's  a  realization  that  eliza,  herself,  has  a  hard  time  actualizing.  when  did  everyone  agree  to  getting  older?  wendy's  got  a  goddamn  kid  held  in  her  arms,  her  own  kid  ...  and  despite  the  part  of  her  stomach  that  sinks  in  the  permanent  settlement  of  reality,  eliza  smiles  -  honestly  smiles,  extending  a  finger  to  trace  over  abel's  cheek.
"don't  lie,  baby  -  shit's  still  messy,"  spoken  with  the  utmost  fondness,  "but  i  wouldn't  trade  it  for  a  thing."
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“ i know we're not, trust me. ” the past turned to scar tissue, the phantom pain of an old wound. youth a blur of gunmetal and engine oil and intoxication. ( made worth it only by the weight of her son in her arms ). tides of chaos that only now had begun to ebb. a calm in the storm’s aftermath, a sense of peace she was still trying to fit to the shape of her bones. head shaking slightly, smile whetted upon wry edge. “ things sure as hell ain't perfect, but i think they're better now. back then? it was messy. ”
@strnza : we’re not nineteen years old anymore.
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strnza · 3 days
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[ nononono! ] – for the sender to hold the receiver’s head / face while they’re injured, brush their thumb along their cheeks & refuse to accept that the receiver is dying. / human angel
she  was  supposed  to  have  more  time  -  they  were  supposed  to  have  more  time.  a  short  life  clipped  in  the  name  of  violence  when  eliza  has  spent  far  too  long  drowning  in  her  own  tragedy;  now,  it's  too  late.  too  late  to  revel  in  the  fact  that  she's  finally  got  her  head  above  water,  is  finally  safe  in  the  happiness  reborn  within  her  newfound  family.  she’s  finally  found  love  and  accepted  it  tenfold  -  pure  stubbornness  &  frustration  lead  her  to  believe  that  she  can  overcome  this  out  of  pure  spite.  (reality  promises  her  the  opposite.)
angel's  face  materializes  before  her  eyes  before  she  can  feel  him  holding  her  -  feel  his  fingers  waver  over  the  gunshot  wound  to  her  abdomen,  bring  her  own  blood  to  her  cheeks  ...  this  wasn't  supposed  to  happen.  not  now  -  ten  years  ago,  alone,  in  her  truck,  drunk  half  to  death  &  with  nothing  to  lose  but  her  own  life:  she'd  begged  for  it.  now?  she'd  do  anything  for  a  miracle.
"i  don't  want  y  -  you  t'see  me  like  this,"  she  chokes  out,  trembling  hand  finding  angel's  -  draped  along  her  profile,  feebly  attempting  to  push  him  off  her  -  when  that  fails,  eliza  tries  to  sit  up,  wincing  &  whimpering  before  succumbing  to  the  position  she  holds  against  him,  "the  kids,  they  can't  -  ...  they  can't  see  this."  the  last  thing  she  remembers  is  locking  them  in  maverick's  bedroom  closet  -  'stay  here.  no  matter  what,  you  stay  here.'
she  chokes  back  a  sob,  unable  to  pacify  unbridled  anger,  fear  &  frustration  any  longer,  "this  isn't  f  -  fair,"  eliza's  hand  lifts  to  hold  angel's  face  in  her  palm,  shaking  with  painstaking  grief;  tears  stream  down  her  cheeks  as  she  pleads,  "we  were  s'posed  to  have  more  time."
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*      MEME,    still  accepting      /    @godsdefied    🤍
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strnza · 3 days
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i didn't plan this . it got out of my control . / xi
in  truth,  she  hadn't  really  planned  on  seeing  xiomara  today  -  hell,  she  hadn't  planned  on  seeing  angel,  either.  nothing  is  going  according  to  plan,  though  ...  could  anyone  have  ever  begun  to  think  up  the  waking  hell  she's  currently  occupying?
eliza  is  anything  but  dismissive  to  the  other  woman  (in  every  turn  of  phrase).  she  swallows  as  she  sees  xiomara  approach  her,  attempting  to  stifle  the  feelings  of  betrayal  that  rise  like  bile  in  her  throat.  she  actively  reminds  herself  that  xiomara  isn't  the  one  at  fault  -  she  was  forcibly  made  a  guilty  party.  (that  doesn't  make  this  hurt  any  less.)
the  look  on  xiomara's  face  hits  eliza  in  the  gut  -  her  apologies,  her  desperate  resignations  sting  even  worse.  instinctually,  she  extends  a  hand  to  meet  the  other  woman's;  eliza  remains  focused  on  her  skin,  the  bond  that  now  holds  them  where  her  own  words  fail  her.
"i  don't  ...  blame  you,  xi.  i  promise,  i  don't,  i  just  -  ..."  it's  as  if  she  burns  to  the  touch.  regretfully,  eliza  drops  xiomara's  hand,  inhaling  a  shaky  breath  through  her  nose  as  she  hides  a  trembling  hand  behind  her  back,  "-  ...  i  can't  do  this  righ'  now.  i'm  sorry,  honey,"  she  pleads,  shaking  her  head:  sorry  that  she  can’t  look  past  this.  sorry  that  she  isn’t  stronger,  sorry  that  angel  thought  with  what’s  between  his  legs  rather  than  what’s  inside  his  head  &  heart  …  sorry  that  this  is  the  life  that  they’re  living,  "i'm  sorry."
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*      MEME,    still  accepting      /    @godsdefied    🤍
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strnza · 3 days
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i  will  have  written  eliza  for  12  years  come  this  august.
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strnza · 4 days
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☀️      ARCHETYPE:    THE  GIRL  WHO  WEARS  HER  HEART  ON  HER  SLEEVE.    BRUTAL,  BRUTAL  LOVE.    /    private,  very  low  activity  blog    -    multifandom    &    disc*rd  writer    -    loved  by  sophie  since  2012.
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strnza · 4 days
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writing  break  2  say:  babie.
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strnza · 4 days
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i'm still in love with you. / ANGEL
she  can't  look  at  him.  she  can't  have  any  of  his  stature  in  her  path  of  sight,  much  less  look  him  in  the  eye.  (the  sight  of  his  body,  even  his  shadow  in  front  of  her,  is  a  threat  that  she  can't  seem  to  actualize.)
eliza  can  barely  stomach  being  in  the  same  room  as  him  -  hell,  half  of  her  wonders  that  if  felipe  and  maverick  weren't  in  the  next  room  over,  she'd  be  smashing  all  her  surroundings  to  bits.  she  wants  it  to  be  that  easy:  wants  to  dispel  rage  from  her  fingertips  &  call  it  even.  wants  to  hurt  him  the  way  that  he  hurt  her,  but  it  isn't  the  same  -  it  isn't  the  fucking  same.  she  feels  like  her  lungs  are  filled  with  water.  eliza  can  hardly  breathe,  and  it's  all  his  fault  -  the  fault  of  the  man  that  she  loves,  who  stands  before  her  with  full  &  honest  reciprocation:  god,  this  would  be  easier  if  she  could  just  hate  him.
"this's  how  you  treat  the  people  you  love?"  her  tone  pricks  with  stifled  emotion,  focusing  hard  on  staring  directly  down  at  her  hands,  "that  scares  me  shitless  for  mav,  angel.  that  is  a  fucked  up  thing  to  say  t'me."
her  anger  is  lethal.  it  bubbles  and  rises  in  her  throat,  falling  just  as  quickly  into  a  sour  pit  of  hurt  in  her  stomach.  his  words  ring  loudly  in  her  ears  -  he's  still  in  love  with  her.  does  he  not  understand  the  implications  of  his  actions?  does  he  just  not  know  any  better,  or  does  he  not  care?  she  makes  the  mistake  of  looking  up  at  him;  the  reflection  of  his  eyes  in  her  own  adds  spark  to  flame,  a  rock  settling  in  her  throat  as  she  attempts  to  keep  calm.
"i  trusted  ...  i  trusted  you,"  a  tear  or  two  surpasses  her  threshold,  eliza’s  hands  rising  to  angrily  wipe  them  away  (she  doesn't  want  him  to  see  her  cry  over  him),  "i  learned  to  love  you  before  i  ever  loved  myself,  an'  you  ruined  that."
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*      MEME,    still  accepting      /    @godsdefied    🤍
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strnza · 4 days
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stop fucking looking at me! / tessa
she's  hardly  deterred  by  the  profanity,  or  the  intention  that  it  comes  with  (she  probably  should  be)  -  rather,  eliza  continues  to  look  directly  at  tessa  &  approach  slowly,  though,  without  reprieve.
a  hand  extends  to  touch  the  other  woman:  tenderly,  gently  &  with  ample  warning.  eliza's  fingers  graze  over  her  forearm,  patiently  awaiting  to  tame  the  wild  beast  before  she  really,  truly  digs  in.  she  moves  down  to  tessa's  palms,  eyes  downturning  to  the  red,  marled  skin  over  her  knuckles,  breath  heavy  with  emotion  as  she  exhales  before  looking  directly  at  tessa  again.
"why're  you  so  cruel  t'yourself?"  she  questions,  rubbing  circles  with  her  thumb  over  tessa's  palm,  "why  won't  you  accept  love?"
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*      MEME,    still  accepting      /    @godsdefied    🤍
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strnza · 4 days
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she  freezes  in  place  as  she  sees  tig  getting  up  from  his  chair,  wincing  slightly  as  he  holds  the  towel  covering  the  small  gash.  her  eyes  dart  between  the  sink  &  tig's  hands  now  holding  the  minor  injury,  unable  to  meet  his  eyes  for  the  time  being;  "i,  um  ...  i  was  cleanin'  dishes,  an'  the  knife  slipped."  in  all  fairness,  that's  the  truth  of  the  matter  -  nothing  more,  nothing  less.
for  a  moment,  eliza's  lips  part,  her  heart  pleading  with  her  mind  to  allow  every  secret  to  come  crumbling  down  in  front  of  tig.  killing  donna  is  one  thing,  but  gemma's  assault  &  eliza's  own  run-in  with  weston?  he  can't  know.  he  isn't  supposed  to  know,  and  it  isn't  fully  her  secret  to  tell.  god,  she  wants  to  -  needs  to.  it’s  eating  her  alive.
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eliza  falters  for  another  moment,  panic  seizing  in  her  throat  as  she  takes  her  arm  back  from  tig,  nodding  toward  the  corner  of  the  kitchen,  "first  aid  kit's  in  that  cabinet,"  she  murmurs,  moving  to  lean  against  a  nearby  table;  he  knows  her  well  enough  to  recognize  that  her  mind  is  just  as  clouded  as  his.  "i  saw  ope  today  -  i  think  it  ...  shook  me  up."
@strnza
               he   sits   in   the   living   room,   the   television   on   but   nobody   is   watching.      he’s   too   busy   thinking   about   all   of   the   shit   going   on.      the   painful   secret   he’s   been   keeping   from   opie,   that   guilt   is   eating   him   up   from   the   inside   out.      having   to   face   that   man   every   day   knowing   it   was   his   own   hand   that   killed   his   wife…      there   would   be   terrible   repercussions   if   he   revealed   the   truth,   possibly   his   own   death.      honestly   at   this   point?      he’s   almost   ready   to   accept   that   fate.
               he’s   brought   out   of   his   thoughts   by   the   one   thing   thats   holding   him   together.      that   beautiful   young   musician   who   has   bound   herself   to   him…      why   he   has   no   earthly   idea.      it   would   be   better   for   her   if   she   took   off,   ran   away   to   los   angeles   to   share   her   gift   with   the   world.      instead   she   chooses   to   stay   in   charming,   and   risk   her   life   every   day   protecting   the   secrets   of   the   club.
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               when   gaze   focuses,   he   can   see   a   small   amount   of   blood   trickling   down   her   wrist.      panic   sets   in,   and   he’s   on   his   feet   and   by   her   side   in   seconds.      ❝   what   happened?   ❞      concern   is   etched   in   his   features,   hands   covering   the   towel   to   keep   the   pressure   on   her   injury.
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strnza · 4 days
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#     𝙳𝚁𝙰𝙼𝟺𝚃𝙸𝙲𝚂.     an exploration of what it takes to be a STAR / 𝚜𝚚𝚞𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛𝚎𝚍 𝚙𝚘𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚊𝚕 / trying to make your parents proud — LOW-ACTIVITY original character, by becky.
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strnza · 6 days
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are you mad at me? would you like to be
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strnza · 8 days
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visuals for u !
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strnza · 10 days
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BRUNA MARQUEZINE as JENNY KORD Blue Beetle (2023) – Dir. by Angel Manuel Soto
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strnza · 11 days
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SCENARIOS WITH UNDERTONES OF TENSION
1) one muse quietly sits beside the other while they cry so they won’t be alone and to make sure no one bothers them.
2) one muse rests their hands on the other’s shoulders from behind,  intending to soothe them and intimidate an unwelcome third party. 
3)  one muse pulls the other into an alley or small space to avoid a third party,  their faces a little too close together. 
4) for our muses to get in an argument but after one muse steps closer while making a point,  they get distracted by how near they are.  bonus points for eyes wandering to the other’s lips. 
5) for one muse to firmly grab a hold of the other while arguing,  the touch slowly growing gentler as they recognize how strong their emotions are for them. 
6) one muse discovers the other has placed themselves in a dangerous,  under cover situation and steps in to help but gives them a severe look when no one is watching to indicate their disapproval. 
7) one muse is in a precarious situation and thinks the rival muse is going to expose or betray them,  but instead they help. 
8) one muse can tell the other is hiding something and grabs a hold of their shoulders to keep them still and make them admit it. 
9) one muse gives the other a brief casual touch,  unintentionally stirring up emotions in the other who swears the warmth lingers on their skin. 
10) one muse is in danger and the other takes hold of their hand to lead them to safety. 
11) one muse is trying to intimidate the other in an attempt to push them away,  but they step closer instead and refuse to let it affect them. bonus points for answering gruffness with gentleness. 
12) a rival or antagonistic muse requires help and coerces the other into giving it to them,  but it leads to them protecting the other muse with a little too much care. 
13) rival or antagonistic muse gets hurt defending the other,  who then forces them to let them treat the injury. 
14) one muse figure out the other is hiding something from them and thinks it’s a betrayal,  only to confront them and realize the other was protecting them  (  possibly at great cost or sacrifice  ). 
15) a muse who is a rival or claims dislike of the other gets angry on their behalf and does something to get revenge for or protect them. 
16) one muse tries to pick a fight with the other because they’re upset,  but they refuse to participate and hug them until they stop struggling. 
17) one muse has been holding a grudge only to discover the other has been secretly doing something to help them. 
18) one muse broke the other’s trust and gets hurt doing something rash to try and win it back. 
19) one muse gets hurt trying to help the other which leads to an argument,  resulting in the one who was being protected to proclaim how much they care about the injured party. 
20) one muse gets hurt trying to help the other which leads to an argument,  resulting in the one injured to proclaim how much they care about the one they were protecting. 
21) antagonistic muse sets out to kill the other,  however the target is too accepting of their fate which makes the antagonist hesitant and curious. 
22) one muse briefly touches the other but when they start to withdraw,  the other places a hand over theirs to keep it in place. 
23) one muse hugs a gruffer or rival muse and refuses to let go until they hug back. 
24) an antagonistic or rival muse is given an act of kindness which baffles them and leads them to stare at the one who gave it with a puzzled expression. 
25) a rival or antagonistic muse ends up being the unlikely person to be there when the other finally breaks down over something they have been suppressing for the sake of their loved ones. 
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