i love it when a character decides they want to live, actually, and gets their wish in the most monkey's paw be-careful-what-you-wish-for "too little too late" way possible
2K notes
·
View notes
wish i could call in bitchy to work
32K notes
·
View notes
anyone find any cool skeletons in the forest lately that they would like to share
3K notes
·
View notes
jarvis show me the fates of those who have wronged me
12K notes
·
View notes
Happy Day of Darkness to everyone in the US, what's the worst that can happen?
95 notes
·
View notes
Fuck. I can't do anything right. *pulls my shirt up slightly and you can see a little bit of my abs*
16K notes
·
View notes
*eminem voice* *falls into a hole in a sewer grate before saying anything*
15K notes
·
View notes
I hope your vibrator runs out of battery halfway through and that the charger is on the other side of the room. And also that you die
4K notes
·
View notes
OH! LIGHT ₜₕₑ ₕₑₐᵣₜ ᴛʜʜʜᴀᴛ lingers in Merano 𝓜𝓔𝓡𝓐𝓝𝓞
14 notes
·
View notes
Maybe he wouldn't be bitchin if u didn't kill him all the time
I never pictured Bucky as a finger biter but like, don't test him. Don't fuck with a creature that can chew through w o o d is my advice.
Also, I love early Bucky all of a sudden what the hell? Look at him he's a little construction workerrr
205 notes
·
View notes