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#:D i have no fucking idea whats happening
qlossytbh · 14 hours
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𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐢𝐝 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐰𝐨 - 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐬𝐨𝐧
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𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 you get an unexpected visitor at headquarters after one of your old high school friends was murdered and rossi has ideas as to how to catch the killer.
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 usual criminal minds content, mentions of killers, mentions of a phsycotic killer :D, mentions of murder, mentions of underage drinking (if i’m missing anything pls let me know)
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 4.4k
𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 we’ve finally got our first flashback ;) i know it’s kinda slow but we will get more spencer x you content in the next chapter, pinky swear. also this is kinda wordy but whatever
𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭
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"Come on, it's not that bad!" You smiled, pushing at Spencer's shoulder as he took a sip of your coffee, face screwing in disgust. "You're such a baby."
"No," He disagreed, voice hoarse as he handed you your coffee back. "That is disgusting."
"Just because it doesn't have about 3 pounds of sugar," You taunted, looking down at his mug with disapproval. "All that sugars gonna' catch up to you one day you know."
"Actually," He started and you felt yourself beginning to groan. "White sugar is a type of carbohydrate that provides energy to the body so what happens is the body breaks down sugar into glucose that can be readily used for energy and to carry out various functions. It improves brain functioning—"
"Spence, it's eight in the morning," You said, resting your forehead on his arm. "As much as I care about you, you are not allowed to go wikipedia on me at this time."
He stifled a laugh, glancing down at you with a soft smile. He took no offense to what you were saying since he knew your favorite thing was to listen to him. You pulled away, taking a sip of your coffee. You looked up at him, opening your mouth to speak but being abruptly interrupted as the kitchen door burst open, causing you to jump and stain your white blouse with coffee.
You looked down at the shirt, hissing in complaint. "Are you fucking—"
You turned, face twisted with anger. Spencer shrank at your demeanor looking over at the door to see who was about to receive the latter end of your anger. He took a sip of his own coffee when he saw  Derek standing by the door. The anger in you began bubbling even closer against the surface. "Really Derek?!"
Just as you were about to scold him even more for being such a brute at eight am, you noticed the features in his face laced with an all too familiar tensity. Realization dawned upon you. He started "Looks like we've got a visitor,"
You watched him, glancing briefly back at Spencer before setting your mug down. "And they're asking for you."
The case currently at hand, although pinching a little too close to your past then comfortable, wasn’t overwhelming you. It made you fidgety and a little more anxious than usual, sure, but you weren't overwhelmed by it. All it did was irritate you, how you always tried so hard to keep your past out of your present, and the present away form the past.
All you wanted, was to find the UnSub and move on. Still, you sighed heavily, popping out of the nice bubble Spencer and you had isolated yourselves in. You left your coffee mug long forgotten as you followed Morgan out of the room and across the hall, Spencer following very closely behind.
"A girl who barged in here, asking for you," Derek explained. You continued your stride across the hall, wondering who could possibly be asking for you. "She said she doesn't wanna' answer any questions until she's spoken to you,"
"Does it have to do with our recent case?" You asked, knowing otherwise but still hoping the answer was no. When Derek's lips pulled into a tight line, you sighed in disappointment letting your shoulders slump. Just as you rounded the main hall, you saw a familiar mop of red hair ranting at Hotch in a blazing fury. You froze in your tracks, almost causing Spencer to knock into you. You watched as she pointed her finger at Hotch, stress, and anxiety written all across her face.
"Claire..?" You said, voice barely above a whisper. All the anger in her face untwisted as she turned to you, her features suddenly soft and all too familiar. She hadn't changed a bit in the ten years you haven't seen her.
"Oh my god," She said, relief flooding her voice as she rushed over to you, pulling you into a tight hug. You remained still, not reciprocating the affectionate gesture as Hotch eyed you from behind her with a questioning look. You shrugged slightly at him, remaining completely neutral.
"I can't believe it," She said, voice soft as she pulled away, grabbing you by your shoulders. You noticed the eye bags and the panicky look in her eyes and suddenly things started clicking for you.
Back in high school, you, Easton, and Claire had been each other's rocks, always going everywhere together and relying on each other greatly. The three of you were best friends and you had been for all four years of high school. After what happened during and after your senior year, you fell out with the two of them and continued your advanced studies, not necessarily making any time to ever see both of them again.
Claire had always been the mediator in the trio. You always felt closer to her than you ever did to Easton. Claire always listened, and she gave the right advice when you needed it. You would've loved staying friends with her after highschool, but since she was so close to Easton, it remained impossible. You'd be lying if you said that seeing her again after all this time didn't tug at the strings of your heart in the slightest.
"You haven't changed a bit," You said, giving her a small smile. She did look the same, all of her sharp features still in tact the same way they were back then. There was a silence. She looked behind you momentarily and you turned, realization hitting you. "Shit, uhm—“
You turned, causing her hands to fall from your shoulders. "This is SSA Derek Morgan, SSA Aaron Hotchner and Dr. Spencer Reid,"
You introduced everyone, pointing at each of your co-workers referringly, to which each responded with a small nod or smile. Her gaze lingered on Spencer, who stood closely beside you. She smiled politely at them all, apprehension still laced in her gaze.
"It sucks that our reunion has to be under such shitty circumstances," She laughed, hugging herself protectively. The humor hadn't quite reached her eyes which caused you to shoot her an empathetic look.
"How are you holding up?" You asked. She opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. She sighed heavily, reaching up to cover her face with her hands. She shook her head.
"I cant believe any of it," She sighed, looking like she hasn't had a single ounce of sleep in days. "It seems like just yesterday she was coming back from her honey moon and now, she just—“
You felt for her, you really did. Even if you and Easton had your own history, you knew her and Claire remained great friends after high school. You didn't know they had still been friends after all of these years though. "Were you at the wedding?"
"I was her maid of honor,"
Oh,
"We're very sorry for your loss," Spencer added. You looked over at him, smiling sadly and appreciating his efforts to be empathetic with her. You reached out, rubbing the side of her arm. She smiled at the two of you weakly. "I'm sure this is all extremely hard on you."
She reached up, rubbing her eyes rapidly, as if trying not to get sensitive in front of everyone. It was understandable, suddenly being surrounded by people she had no clue of, and losing someone close to you is not easy and it could be very overwhelming.
You looked over at Hotch before starting. "We're trying our hardest to figure out who could have done this to them,"
"Do you mind coming in for some questioning?" You asked. Claire looked over at Hotch apprehensively, clearly not approving of him.
"We think you can help us determine if there was anyone that may have wanted to intentionally hurt Easton and Michael—" You explained, trying to ease her up. "—And Sarah and Adam.."
She sighed heavily, nodding her head with acceptance "Yeah, that's fine.."
"I promise, we'll catch up afterward," You smiled as Hotch and Morgan guided her towards one of the interrogation rooms. You watched her intently as she walked away. With a beat, you looked down at your watch, huffing quickly and furrowing your brows.
"Must be hard for her," You stated. Spencer took notice of how unbothered you seemed, and he didn't skip out on calling you out.
"And what about you..?" Spencer asked curiously, shoving his hands into his pocket and staring you down from his spot next to you. You turned to him, tilting your head.
"What?" You asked.
He shrugged, looking to the side momentarily. "For a case hitting so close to home, it would be normal for this to affect you,"
You pursed your lips and responded truthfully. "It doesn't,"
Spencer looked you in the eye and did what he always tried doing when he suspected something was up with you. He tried profiling you, something that with time, you knew how to fight against, especially when it came from Spencer. His brows crinkled with a familiarity that was only present when he was worried about you. You reached up, rubbing your thumb against the furrowed skin of his brows and smoothing it out gently. "You worry too much."
"Haha." He shoved your hand away as you snickered to yourself. You were glad that with everything going on, you could still find the time to laugh. Spencer made that very easy.
"You," You reached up to link your arms with his as you began dragging him down the hall, all the way to Garcia's office. "Are going to accompany me to visit our lovely technical analyst,”
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You watched as both Easton and Claire downed whatever drink it was they had in their hands, music blaring loud and people waltzing around intoxicated at every turn you made. Not completely sober, but not all that drunk either, you found yourself feeling as if yet another Friday night had gone to waste.
"Can you believe we're already seniors?" Easton cheered, throwing her hands around both you and Claire. You stifled a laugh at her slurred voice, knowing the hangover she was bound to have tomorrow was going to be brutal.
"This year is going to be absolutely insane," Claire said, excitement laced in every syllable of her voice. You rolled your eyes and cringed internally, swirling your drink in your hands and debating whether or not you should throw it out since you weren't really in the mood to drink anymore.
You knew you had to get a lot of studying done tomorrow because you were taking some advanced courses that would get you ahead of certain subjects, effectively allowing you to finish the school year earlier and begin your college studies ahead of time.
You had always been very different from Claire and Easton, but you had never seen a problem with it. Claire cheered you on whenever you decided to focus on school work rather than go out on a Friday night, claiming that she could never have your willpower, but Easton always teased you and pushed you to 'let loose'. Of course, you went out with them sometimes, but you also knew when to stay in and focus on yourself, and you never saw that as a crime. It was like enjoying the best of both worlds.
Although lately, going out with Easton felt more like a chore than something you genuinely enjoyed doing.
"Are we finally going to attempt to loosen Y/n up?" Easton shouted over the blasting music, pulling you into a side hug. You laughed awkwardly, a very small feeling of annoyance bubbling in your stomach.
"Oh shush Easton," Claire slapped the girl's arm, rolling her eyes indefinitely. "We know Y/n is going to rock it this year in her own special way."
"Shoving her face into a book isn't my definition of rocking your senior year," Easton added.
"Well shoving my face into someone else's twice a week isn't my definition of rocking my senior year, but you don't see me shaming you, huh?" You bit back, deciding to defend yourself rather than let her step on your toes for what felt like the fifth time this week. You and Easton worked like that. Sometimes it was complicated though, since it was hard to draw the line between teasing and passive-aggressive comments.
"Not my fault you're a prude," You sighed, crossing your arms as she let you go. That's the complicated line you were talking about. Claire shot a disapproving look towards Easton.
"I'm kidding!" She shrugged innocently, holding her hands up in defense. "But like seriously, isn't there anyone that sparks your attention? Not even a little bit?"
You sighed once again, knowing this conversation was popping up. Easton was a very 'out there' person, to say the least. She had a very bad habit of agreeing to hook up with any 'hot man' that breathed. And being part of a private school, everyone seemed to be connected to everyone, somehow. If someone didn't know your business, it was someone else's personal goal that they did, and so the story goes on. And for some peculiar reason, Easton was very vocal and passionate about the fact that you didn't throw yourself at anything that breathed.
"No Easton,"  You set your drink down on the small stool that was available right beside you, not in the mood to drink at all anymore. "Just like I said last time you asked me."
"What about Henry? He seems cool," She pursed her lip in thought. Claire's face twisted with disapproval.
"Henry's a total jerk," Claire warned. Easton sighed in defeat and began scanning the room attentively. You watched her, unamused and annoyed, up until her face popped with excitement.
"Wait a second," She said, reaching out for your arm and pulling you in closer to whisper. "What about the guy in white, over by the kitchen aisle that's practically drooling at the sight of you?"
You deadpanned at Easton but looked in the direction she pointed to anyway. As you looked over, your eyes suddenly fell on a man in a white-clad t-shirt, who was in fact, looking over at you with deep curiosity. You suddenly, for the first time in who knows how long, felt nervous under the gaze of a man. He smiled at you softly from the other point of the room, to which you uncontrollably returned and your heart flipped inside your chest. Just as you opened your mouth to protest, the man began making his way over to the three of you.
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You had spent all afternoon skipping through file after file and picture after picture with Garcia and Spencer, while Hotch and Morgan interviewed Claire. Rossi, JJ, and Prentiss called you every few hours to dump more newly acquired information on the victimology report based on what they were seeing over at the crime scene. Your brain was practically about to melt out of your ears. The comfort of the conference room chair seemed overwhelming once you sat down, finally giving your back a break.
Claire had left headquarters just only a few hours ago which now left you all to lay out and create a new profile. Everyone sat at the table until Hotch and Morgan walked into the room.
"We've interviewed Claire Thomspon for more accurate victimology reports and further insight on our Unsub's possible motives for killing both pairs of victims," Morgan stated, rubbing his chin absentmindedly. "Claire declared that Easton had various romantic and sexual relations during high school and every relationship she started was as soon as she ended a previous one,"
"So enraged ex that most probably wanted revenge?" Prentiss said.
"But then what connection would Sarah and Adam have to the murders?" You asked, furrowing your brows in contemplation.
"His murdering methods reflect his psychological state and motivations. For example, if he meticulously plans and execute his killings with precision and calculation, which clearly isn't the case here, it could suggest a need for control and dominance, but since his methods are more frenzied and impulsive, it could indicate overwhelming emotions, and a lack of impulse control." Spencer explained, looking over at you. You nodded, glancing down at the file report and scribbling something across the side of it.
"Meaning Sarah and Adam could've just been collateral damage," You finished, looking back up at him from your seat across him. He nodded.
"If this is revenge, the Unsub may experience, intense feelings of powerlessness, and a need to exert control over others as a way to cope with his emotional pain. Slaughtering married couples could serve as a twisted form of retribution symbolizing the perceived betrayal and abandonment he experienced." Spencer continued, hands dancing around freely, something that always happened when Spencer talked on like this, he was very expressive with his hands.
"By targeting couples, he may be projecting his own feelings of envy and resentment towards those who have found happiness and stability in their relationships." You completed, giving Spencer a proud smile.
And this is exactly why Hotch thinks the two of you work best together, it’s as if your minds were synchronized and every blossoming thought was finished by the other.
"Do we have any leads?" JJ asked.
"We've asked Garcia to pull up some names of people who have a past with Easton." Morgan explained with ease, you looked down once again.
"That's gonna be a long list," You mumbled, low enough for anyone to hear.
It was true though. You weren't shaming her for sleeping around. It was simply a reality that she broke a lot of egotistical men and saw having sex with them as a way of feeling good about herself. You even heard her say once that 'men were just trophy's waiting to be collected by her'. It worked, she felt amazing about herself, and she truly had any man she ever wanted.
"So what would you say our profile is?" Rossi finally spoke up, being awfully quiet as he silently drew his own conclusions.
Hotch began. " We're looking for a 27-year-old male with an unremarkable, physical appearance, something that allows him to blend in with the general population."
You allowed yourself to think back on your past, dwelling if you remembered anyone that might fit the Unsub report.
"He maintains a fit or athletic build which helps him overpower his victims and he leads a relatively solitary existence, avoiding social interactions." He continued in a serious demeanor. "He exhibits narcissistic tendencies with a sense of entitlement, believing that he deserves attention or admiration. He's adept at manipulating others and his actions may be driven by impulsive, completely disregarding consequences, leading to reckless behavior."
"He also harbors a severe paranoia, showing irrational fears and suspicion leading to a heightened sense of vigilance and a tendency to see threats where non-existent." Morgan said, closing off as he sat back down into a chair. Rossi pursed his lips in thoughts.
That described about half of your class though— unfortunately. You rubbed your temples, lowering your head and processing the information, trying to rack your brain on anyone viable who gave you 'serial killer vibes' back in the day. You looked back up, and turned your gaze towards Hotch, opening your mouth to speak
"So wait, if our UnSub presents a lack of impulse control, couldn't that mean that he could strike again even if Easton is dead?" You asked. Hotch nodded and you felt your hands begin to grow clammy.
"We asked Garcia to pull out the names of the couples that have been married in the last year or so from the class of North Virginia High School,"
"How many married high school sweethearts are there in one graduating class?" Emily asked, looking over at you in disbelief. You leaned back in your chair and scoffed.
"Our class was compared to an orgy," You stated, an unamused stance settling your gaze. "That says enough,"
You couldn't even count all the people in your class that had either hooked up, had sex, got together or got married, with your two hands. You never understood what the desperation was at the time, apart from the raging hormones— and its not like your class was full of A-list celebrity lookalikes.
Easton had always wanted you to have your fair share of hookups with the guys in your class, but you had fortunately settled your low scale of bodies on a whooping number one. 
"So, we just—" Emily's brows were furrowed deeply. "—wait until our Unsub shows signs of attacking one of our couples?"
Everyone waited for an order. You didnt believe that was the smartest idea, because yet another two people could possibly end up killed if you didnt play your cards right. You felt uneasy as you waited for Hotch to put together a plan that you could all follow, but he even he was struggling to decide how to love on. Suddenly, Rossi's voice cuted through the air.
"No, that would be stupid." He hummed, narrowing his eyes in deep contemplation. "We need someone from the inside."
You stopped, peering intently at Rossi as you gave Morgan a quizzical look, slightly stupefied by Rossi's sudden intervention. He shrugged his shoulders at you, clearly just as lost as you were. Sometimes, it was hard to follow along with Rossi's thought process, which was surprising to say the least, since you completely understood Spencers.
"We could use you, as a decoy," He said, cutting his gaze over to you and pointing a finger. You froze in your seat, shrinking at the sudden call out. You choked on your own breath, being completely taken off-guard by him. Not because you didn't have it in you to go undercover but because—
"Uh—" You cleared your throat, coughing once or twice. "Sir, I'm not married..."
"Yet." Was all Rossi said.
You tilted your head, truly not getting a single word coming from this man's mouth "Come again?"
Everyone shared dumbstruck looks. When you looked over at Spencer, he was just as confused as you were. You shared a silent conversation but all you could answer with were confused shrugs. Hotch looked ahead, suddenly seeming to grasp onto Rossis implications.
"You mentioned Claire was still in contact with many of your ex-classmates, right?" Hotch asked. You pursed your lips, blinking slowly and turning to him.
"Uh, yeah, she mentioned something like that earlier—"
"So then you lure the Unsub in," He stated, explaining what Rossi's brilliant mind was getting at. You closed your mouth and narrowed your eyes just ever so slightly. "You and Reid go undercover as a newly wed couple, and you lure the Unsub in, making yourself the next posible target."
Your mind screeched to a halt as you straightened up in your chair. Suddenly, Spencer was heard choking on his own breath in his seat in front of you. You felt your minds racing hit a brick wall, silence and stillness hitting every fiber of your body. "You want me to—Huh..?"
You weren't even quite sure how to process anything that had just been said. Questions began dawning at you, because one, why you? And why Spencer? And why together— as a married couple?
"It'd be a complex operation, that would include meticulous planning but," Rossi suddenly pulled out papers and began scribbling down. "Comprehensive security measures would be implicated, and with Claire in the mix, you two can find ways to get yourselves to interact with the high schools graduate community and it's very probable that the Unsub, is baited in, especially with Y/n being an ex-classmate."
"Actually," Emily started, looking between you and Spencer, who both shared the exact, red painted look on both your faces. "Thats not a bad idea."
"Wait, wait— You want me, to go undercover as a married couple, with Spencer..?" You asked again. It all started slowly falling, like dominos. You finally allowed your minds gears to rear back into movement as you shook your head slightly.
"Yes,"
Pretending to be a married couple implicated everything being a married couple was. And Rossi was implying, that you pretend to be a married, romantic, madly in-love, head-over heels about each other, couple with— Spencer? Which meant living in the same house, sharing the same things, going everywhere with each other, hugging, touching, kissing, sharing the same bed?—
Okay, now you were overthinking it.
You felt a sudden patter in your chest, that traveled all the way to your skull and through your ears, pressing against your throat. You felt heat rush to your cheeks at just the thought of all of that, and if you weren't mistaken, you could've sworn you felt your stomach flip in circles.
Spencer was your best friend yet why did this feel so incredibly exposing..?
"If you think about it, Reid and Y/l/n would be the only ones able to convincingly portray a married couple..." JJ shrugged. You glared over at JJ wondering what the hell she meant by that.
Suddenly, things were moving all too quickly and all too suddenly. You dared yourself to look over at Spencer who was surprisingly, in the same shaken up state that you were. His cheeks were glowing red, and something in his gaze was silently speaking to you. You looked back at him, feeling an unfamiliar uncertainty begin to nip at you. You were too scared to speak up, and for the first time, you truly couldn't read a single thought behind those hazel eyes you had grown to care about so deeply.
"I—uhm," You said, voice hoarse and weak. "You really think this is a good idea?"
"I think it's our closest shot at catching this guy without anyone else getting hurt." Rossi stated.
"But we only do it if the two of you are a hundred percent willing to do so," Hotch reminded. You looked back at Spencer, not knowing what to think, or what to say, or what to do. His gaze relaxed, in constrast to your panicky one, and he gave you a small nod of encouragement. You swallowed thickly.
He looked over at Rossi, nodding slowly. "Okay, we'll do it."
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𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 @yondiii @r-3dlips @moonchildohh @rubyirene @sp3ncelle @alisyacsa @pleasantwitchgarden @landooscurls @chonkybonky
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mifithemuffin · 3 months
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the grape jewel end is like the Fate is fucking AVOIDED
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caffeiiine · 6 months
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one more thing thats been rotating around my head:
my school anime club hosts an anime con in the spring and i am genuinely so excited bc club members are staff amnd we are hsoting it! and i can host a panel!!!
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bijoumikhawal · 11 months
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For the ship ask game: Sisko/Garak, Kira/Dax, O'Brien/Bashir
Sisko/Garak: ship it!
What made you ship it? I Do Not Remember. It may have been @ectogeo-rebubbles ITPM fic and it gradually grew on me but I don't know what to do with I now.
What are your favorite things about the ship? 1. Potential analysis for a very different way of being intimate with Garak, for one. With Julian he's always performing a bit, and his intimacy with Julian is cloaked in layers of complications and subterfuge- they're both very used to performing, performance is how that communicate. I find their dialogue often very easy to write because they're both very witty and vaudevillian (it's a dynamic some of the guys from my attempt at an audio drama have lol). But with Sisko I've noticed that Garak has points where he drops the jovial attitude and is very straightforward with him, kind of like he's dropping a ruse. It's not that Sisko doesn't enjoy those mannerisms of Garak's- as I think @wanderingwriter87 pointed out, Sisko appreciates Garak's bits- or that that's false behavior from Garak, but it's a kind of unmasking Garak is not prone to allow. 2. There's a very different power dynamic between them- perhaps controversial but during the run of the show I think Garak is put in a weak position, powerwise, compared to the vast majority of other characters as an exile who does not seem to have his citizenship sorted out. Socially, however, there are ways he wields power with Julian or even like, Quark where he's clearly got an upper hand that he doesn't with Sisko, who is of the same generation as Garak. Like, Garak does very notably manipulate him, but not the way he does with other people. And 3. Comparing and contrasting the social contexts they come from. Obviously Hebitians are like, my blorbo culture, but they're both middle aged men who adore children, and are pretty family oriented! However Sisko has a pretty healthy relationship to his family and Garak's family is an... on fire dumpster. Garak is very loyal to his father and craves his love and needs his approval for survival, while also calling him a monster and wishing him dead. Sisko seems to have trouble understanding that other people have severely negative relationships to their parents that may not be able to get resolved (it happens at least twice) because his father has been a good man to him. And to top all that off, Sisko has a son who's coming into adulthood! Children are their own whole people! Family is not a physically distant concept for him!
Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship? I don't think there are popular opinions... maybe that I don't think Garak actually caught Sisko as off guard as people act like he did during IPTM. Like, Sisko’s anger is less about what Garak did and more about the fact that he knows what he did. Sisko knows who garak is, what he's capable of, and if not specifics of what he used to do, the kind of things he used to do. Hell, this is after Garak went to jail for trying to do mass murder. Sisko was planet side during that!
Kira/Dax: I have no hard feelings on it, but I think saying I ship it is lesbian-pair the spares type cheating. I find Kira interesting and have been trying to read more stuff about Jadzia to understand more about her, but I don't rotate them in my head as much separately or together to feel like it counts. I think I've written more like- character analysis? On Kai Winn than on Kira through my perspective of her as a martyr-that-wasn't and how I think DS9 fails to accurately understand and critique the religious context Bajor exists within. Which is funny, because I like Kira and think Winn is a super shitty person- I've mostly ended up thinking about her more because people have such bad takes about her.
O'Brien/Bashir- I don't ship it
Why don't you ship it? Honestly I genuinely think Miles is straight, I don't think his and Julian's relationship has that kind of intimacy and I struggle to understand the intimacy they do have as friends (Miles being an "everyman" means he's a bit of a "shittyman" and we'd be fine co-workers- he's a lot better than some of the people I worked with in welding, which is like winning and award for tallest dwarf- but I would not voluntarily talk to him on off hours). And frankly any openness I've had to it has been killed by the shitty and annoying behavior I've seen from Jiles fans towards their "competition". I'm sure some of it isn't like- sincere? But it's a style of humor and behavior I find rude and off-putting. Also like- I don't like how most people talking about it regard Keiko.
What would have made you like it? You could maybe analyze how Julian thinks he knows what's best for people and that makes him more inclined towards decisions in intrapersonal relationships that really are bad for everyone, I did read a ficlet like that once with it that I found compelling
Despite not shipping it, do you have anything positive to say about it? I do think it can be an interesting analysis of repression on Miles's part and I hope people have fun with it
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today is not a good day
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hellfireeddiemunson · 3 months
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finally having time to myself since 3pm yesterday (it’s 11pm rn) and i want to stay up and relax and watch stuff so i can have a nice time by myself before having to work tomorrow but i am EXHAUSTED and also want to sleep so bad😭😭😭
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janiedean · 1 year
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the more time passes the more it's obvious why I'm shit at expressing emotions and why I loathe doing it openly and it's a damned shame neither of my damned parents reads fantasy because maybe if i told them the more you are like this the more i end up like stannis baratheon's reincarnation if the damage isn't done already they'd get the fucking point
#i'm so fucking tired that every single time i have to express not feeling great/up to par/on top of things#it becomes YOU WANT TO BE A VICTIM AND BLAME OTHER PEOPLE FOR IT#jfc i want to rest#i've spent three years coped there with them with first row seat to parent one becoming completely paranoid but okay#and that's not even 5% of the problem#i'm too tired to stand i'm doing two jobs at once one of which is draining af#neither of them is even netting me immediate money#i've worked sundays for a whole damned month and a half#they have zero idea of half of the shit i'm dealing with#bc the mOMENT you talk about your feelings it's C H I L D I S H#and then 'why didn't you talk about x before'#idk didn't wanna get told it was my fault and i had to man up maybe#and like my father has a half excuse i'm not disclosing bc his business#and it's like what i suspect not anything anyone said out loud#but god my mother could fucking get a hint#yeah let's go to therapy for years so that every single time i patch a hole in the ship#CANNONBALL FROM THE OTHER SIDE HAPPENS#and it's worse all over again#meanwhile my stomach has been closed up since an hour and i can't even stand up#and then i feel like i shouldn't complain until i manage to move out#i just want to go in a forest for six months and stop being perceived tbh#i hope i don't regret posting these tags but jfc#At YoUr AgE I hAd A jOb AnD a BaBy#yeah okay sorry i'm not you#there's a fucking reason i'm never gonna have children it would wreck me and i know it#but since YOU did it then everyone can
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k1rishiki · 3 months
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The Tiktokers Are Saying That Romeo And Cinderella Is About Grooming
#HELLO???? NO IT FUCKING ISN'T??????? don't f w me when it comes to romeo and cinderella i'm literally named after that shit#inb4 i also know more abt grooming than the average tiktoker bc i was Literally In The Situation They Say Happened In The Song#ie. groomed by an older teenager when i was 13-14#the entire claim is based around a. the romeo and juliet metaphor and a random ass claim about romeo's age (he doesn't have one but is.#based on context clues. two years older than her tops). and even if it was true r&j still wouldn't be abt grooming bc that would require it#writer to view the relationship as such. which shakespeare obv didn't. + it's not literally about r&j it's abt a teen girl comparing her#relationship to famous love stories and the pop cultural perception of them. b. the bit abt her parents not liking her 'romeo' when like#there are half a million reasons someone's parents could disapprove of their relationship that don't involve an age gap. also the parents#are shown to be v overbearing throughout the song so like . if anyone is mistreating her it's them. c. any of the various childlike#references. she's a teenager reaching for the adult world while still experiencing childlike naivete. this is to emphasize that. it doesn't#mean that she's secretly younger or anything. d. the school uniform line. she means that she's willing to run away at a moment's notice#without looking back home to go get her real clothes so that her parents could have the chance to stop her. it's a statement of devotion an#there's nothing to imply that romeo isn't also dressed in a school uniform. e. the you'll hate me line. a major part of the song is her#internal conflict of having to choose between her parents and romeo. her concern isn't based on the idea that if she does something wrong#romeo will hate her it's based on the fear that her indecision will hurt romeo's feelings. which is seen again in me and juliet. the#official sequel song. which is about how after they run away together she becomes overwhelmed by her internal conflict bc it didn't just go#away after she made her choice and she still loves her parents enough to question it. and finally f. the wolf line. which is about her#indecision. it's about her indecision. if romeo doesn't whisk her away quickly enough while she's leaning in that direction she feels she'l#have more time to doubt herself and it'll eat her up inside. it's a common metaphor babes and it's LITERALLY WHAT THE SEQUEL SONG IS ABOUT#romeo.txt
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Hey Brodia fans do we think there's a nonzero chance some fuckhead noble ends up thinking the Morion Incident was a covered up/conveniently timed coup so Diamant could take over
(This is, ofc, Bullshit™️, and it makes both Diamant and Alcryst understandably incredibly upset)
#katie rambles#spoilers#engage spoilers#fe 17 spoilers#just a little political drama#because i dont think Diamant doing a 180 on what his dad did as a ruler is going to go over smoothly#might be an unpopular opinion because diamant seems well liked at least but also like. nobles be noble-ing#its probably also reduced because Alear was there and like. who the fuck questions the Divine Dragon#you're gonna walk up to jesus and tell him he's lying? ':/#but idk i think about diamant's patience finally snapping when someone gets bold enough to even suggest the idea#and he just grabs them and throws them out of the council room#because like hey man what the fuck is wrong with you you think anyone wanted morion to bite it like he did#you think diamant really wanted to finally have the sword over his head drop so mercilessly??#like people are unfortunately assholes and most of the country was not in the room where it happened so to speak#so i think it's really only reasonable for at least one person to press x to doubt the whole 'dad got zombie-d so we had to put him down'#also sad over alcryst being the one to do it because i think like.#part of what helps him follow through is feeling his rep is already shit what does he have to lose compared to his brother he loves so much#so like he really does become the black sheep of the court when what happened is explained#idk something something sudden family death intersecting with the politics of being the successors of a kingdom#alear is just here vibing because alcryst is his boyfriend and needs the emotional support and is just (pikashock) if/when diamant snaps
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musical-chick-13 · 8 months
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Girl help, I talked myself out of writing a fic because I was worried about being Harassed™
#ugh maybe I WILL just post it anonymously. and not link it here at all. and only send it to my friends.#honestly it's like. not even That Bad. but I know how people get and I will ABSOLUTELY get accused of 'romanticizing [bad thing]'#which like. I don't think people have the best grasp on what that term really means but. also that's...not the purpose of what I'm doing#anyway. like I don't want to go into specific detail but 100% the point of this is to work through an o/c/d thing but I KNOW people#are not going to see it that way. and it's just...like I understand there is nuance here. because talking about the WAY people#write and represent various issues (in fandom and out of it) is helpful I think. and there are a lot of insidious holdovers from various#types of prejudices occurring in those overall trends. but also like...no one except me knows what's going on in my head and what#my intention is. and I can try to make that clear but that's not always going to translate and also if something is meant to Work Through A#Thing then......I don't want to tell people what exactly it is that I'm working through. that is very private information that I don't want#ANYONE to know. and I don't think I should have to put that on display to be ''''allowed'''' to write this thing I'm writing.#it's also once again very funny to me how many people are like 'oh h*nnibal/h*nnigram peak tv true art™' and then like. get mad at someone#for writing something that's equally fucked up but in a different way#like why does this keep happening.#(I have an idea but I already made that post 2 years ago and I got one of my few instances of actual genuine anon hate over it)#ANYWAY
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androcola · 1 year
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my mom when the kid she kept inside for 18 years with no friends and no social interaction whatsoever ends up with anxiety and most likely is agoraphobic:
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rubenesque-as-fuck · 2 years
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Soooo I guess I have a date for Wednesday evening now? That happened a lot faster than I expected.
Feeling weird. Nervous. Apprehensive. Lots of other emotions that are harder to nail down. The idea of it going well is almost scarier than it being a bust.
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featherymainffins · 12 days
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Btw as much as I love everything Slay The Princess has going on in its themes and symbolism you gotta understand there is a part of me who yearns for that "Wouldn't it be terrifying to be defined wholly by the perception of others and to have no say in this at all?" and this is the second time he's gotta slam a fist on the table to the sound of "God damn it!"
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hauntingblue · 5 months
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Oh zoro that was a slay. The silence at the start until he attacks...... banger
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