im ill, here's this;
steve is a huge brat when he's sick.
he doesn't mean to be it's just that his already heightened sensory issues get worse and it's hard to not be insufferable when you can't get to comfortable temperature and nothing feels right, and not to mention the fact that his hair keeps touching his fucking neck and his throat itches to high heaven and he can't do anything to fucking scratch it.
so yeah.
he's a bit of a handful.
but eddie takes it in stride.
the other days of the year steve is basically chasing after him like he's a toddler playing near a cliff, and it's the one time steve will let eddie take care of him with out a huge ass hassle.
so he makes the toast, and he makes it again when he didn't get it right the first time. and he turns the ceiling fan on, and turns it off, and turns the tv off, and rubs his head because he's got a headache 24/7 and lord knows it's only worse now.
in summary, eddie's a damn good babysitter when it comes to sick steve. especially since pretty much everyone else, save for robin, has sworn off taking to him when he's sick.
eddie can handle it all.
every last thing.
except...
steve sneezes so fucking loud.
it's like a grandpa sneeze and a nuclear bomb if they were combined, and it scares eddie because jesus. steve sneezes with such force, i mean that's got to hurt, right?
he tries to be sympathetic because he's pretty sure steve pulled a muscle from how hard he sneezes but he even scares the cat for gods sake.
and eddie has noise sensitivity.
and well. it's hard to take care of someone when their sneezes scare the shit out of you and cause a visceral reaction. so they come up with a system.
eddie takes care of steve when he's sick and being an absolute brat, and steve warns eddie every time he's about to sneeze. even if it is just a false alarm.
and it makes since that they're together.
because only people in love would do that for each other.
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Snzarios for Every Month.
I’m also going to do one for sicknesses in general, rather than just colds.
January 🎄
So many people get sick right after the holidays, after exposure to countless colds and germs, and the stress of the season. Maybe a relative was sick, or maybe someone at Walmart while you were doing your last-minute Christmas shopping. Either way, you’re down with a bad head cold.
A stuffy, runny nose
Sneezes that are so tickly they coax more sneezes out.
Every time you sniffle, you can feel congestion going down the back of your sore throat 😣
Headache from constant sneezing and coughing. It throbs with every stifled sneeze, but you can’t stop stifling because then someone else might catch your germs and come down with a bad cold of their own.
What would a winter cold be without chills? And a fever just high enough to make you feel sooo sickkkkk 😩
February ❄️
I catch the messiest colds ever in February, I don’t know why. Like, there was only one February (2021) since I can remember that I didn’t get an awful cold. Idk why 😬 oop
Potential low-grade fever, but constant chills.
Achy throat, head, chest, and basically everything else,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Nose is completely stuffed up, but somehow runs like a faucet? 🤨 messy af
Sneezing continuously, getting rid of a ton of thick, gooey snot, but still not doing anything to help the congestion.
A cough, just so your throat will continue to hurt
So incredibly tired from the sneezing, sniffling, and snot production
March ⛅️
So many people are getting sick as the weather starts to change and snow starts to melt, kicking off allergy season. Sneezy season pushes on.
Headache
Chills, but no fever
Congestion. Plugged, snotty nose and sneezing, a cough, discomfort in general. You are a complete snot monster, but you can’t help it. You can only blame whoever gave you such a horrible cold.
April 🌧
April showers bring May flowers, but they also bring bouts of spring colds. The weather is beginning to get nicer, but you have to be stuck in bed with a bad cold.
Fever and aches. Not the kind of fever that makes you solely cold, but the kind that makes you sweat and have goosebumps simultaneously. As for aches, think head, throat, chest, legs, arms, everything.
A head that’s so stuffed up that the sufferer can’t breathe, let alone sneeze normally. With every breath, they can feel everything shifting grossly inside of their head.
May 💐
Why do I feel like everyone catches the sniffles at the end of the school year?
A runny, slightly sniffly nose that’s just stuffy enough for them to sound congested, and for their exhaled to feel uncomfortably hot against their skin.
Sneezing, a result of the snotty, itchy nose.
A sight, irritated cough
June 💦
Summer break is prime time to swim, but the earlier in the season you do it, the colder the water will be. Keep this in mind, because swimming in cold water can result in a nasty cold.
It would start off with chills. Your body would try to warm up, but eventually a fever would start to set in.
Your nose would begin running when you were in the water, but it wouldn’t stop when you got out. It would completely stuff you up within a few hours.
A headache/body aches from shivering for hours on end. No amounts of medicine, blankets, or hot tea can warm you up.
Sneezing excessively. By excessively, I mean, not being able to stop and needing to wipe your face after each one because they are so messy.
Coughing, but only after you blow your nose, because of the irritation.
A sore throat and glands from all of the sneezing and coughing and being sick in general.
July 🔥
Everyone around seems to be sick with something. Staying up on the Fourth of July might have been your body’s last straw. Say hello to a gross, streaming summer cold.
A fever, which causes you to sweat and shiver simultaneously. It’s ninety degrees, whatever. A heavy sweatshirt would make you feel better.
An extremely stuffy nose which only runs at inconvenient times.
Stuffy sneezes, which the sufferer is constantly trying to ward off so the others won’t notice the monster of a cold they’ve come down with.
A bad, congested cough, just to make hiding their illness harder.
Bonus points! The sufferer is constantly ducking off to blow their nose or cough away from the rest of the group because being sick embarrasses them.
August 🏵
One of the hottest months of the year, hypothetically a month you shouldn’t get sick during. But after a long, busy summer, your immune system needed a day off. Unfortunately, that day was long enough to land you with a stuffy head cold. Oops.
A nose so stuffy that sniffling does absolutely nothing. No matter how hard you try, nothing moves, untiiillllllll it starts running uncontrollably.
Stuffy sneezes to partner with the congestion 😌
Exhaustion. That’s it, exhaustion.
September 📓
Everyone is going back to school and getting exposed to all sorts of new germs. Despite best efforts to avoid sick people, a snotty cold is practically inevitable.
There just had to be a very runny and stuffy nose
A headache
Sore throat
Just enough sneezing to tell everyone you’re sick ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
October ☔️
Imagine getting caught in a cold autumn rainstorm, getting chilled to the bone, and coming down with a vicious cold as a result of it.
stuffy/runny nose, of course, because that’s what cold weather does to you.
sore throat that makes you sound so hoarse 🥺
head/body aches
fever and chills
an unimaginable amount of congestion
a cough caused by the congestion
constant, excessive sneezing, each causing a wet, inescapable mist of cold germs to rain down on anyone nearby. and no, tissues do nothing to contain the sneezes, because they are far too messy.
November 🎃
okie so I can’t actually think of anything except !! catching a chill on Halloween that knocks you down with a huge cold.
stuffy/runny nose
sore throat
headache
a constant chill and a slight fever
constant sneezing
December 🚎
The darkest, dampest month, perfect for getting sick. The snow is getting more frequent, and it’s not uncommon for you to get stuck in it waiting for a bus. Once you get on the bus, you’re in close quarters with a bunch of sick people, like it or not. The worst chest cold of your life is on its way.
A sniffly nose
A sore throat and hoarse voice
A ton of congestion and a bad cough that makes the congestion and hoarseness obvious
Even the sneezes sound hoarse and stuffy 🥺
On top of that, a headache and fever because of how sick you are. The fever makes you shiver and sweat and sleep and feel absolutely miserable.
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