#ætherspeak

[gl8m]

im so fucking sad

#i hope you’re happy #you didn’t mean to hurt me but you also don’t care that you did #the only way i can move on is to despise you #and i cant even do that #the truth is that i miss you #at night when im picking on my skin #and in the afternoon when im tired and sleepy #and in the morning when i see what you’ve done while i was asleep #and when i wake up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night i think of you too as im drying my hands #and i wish there was an action i could take that would take this away from me #but im just stuck like always #loving but never loved #i hope you know we could’ve been good together #that i couldve given you what you needed #and that i don’t think there will come a day that im not in love with you #ætherspeak #deen #youre too gentle but not enough with me #you have no idea the impact you have on me #i wish i could run out of fuel and just lie here dormant

[gl8m]

i can’t do this anymore. I am so alone. I’ll never get rid of this

#ætherspeak #the sadness will last forever

[gl8m]

some people just aren’t meant to succeed

#im sorry that i tried #ætherspeak

[gl8m]

I hate birthdays and mine most of all

Fuck that shit and I hope everyone stops celebrating birthdays forever

#ætherspeak

[gl8m]

I cried so much these last few days for her

I even cried in front of my friend and my therapist

I think i have something irreparable

#ætherspeak

[gl8m]

its gotten to the point where every day is the worst day of my fucking life

I feel like ive got water up my nose and nothing can get it out

#ætherspeak

[gl8m]

hanging out with nonaustistics makes me feel like a fucking idiot

#ætherspeak

[gl8m]

I want to shove my yarn scissors square intomy chest and watch it bleed while i ignore every survival alarm bell in my head

#ætherspeak #i can’t do it anymore #i can’t live knowing im different and condemned to be alone forever #i would rather die #with a little bit of dignity left

[gl8m]

liter moments away from k¡lling myself im not even joking lmao

#ætherspeak #and the saddest thing is ill die a pathetic lonely virgin #funny if not tragic

[gl8m]

im so fucking sad

#ætherspeak #i cant handle it #i really want to kms like really #if i have to live unloved i would rather die #nobody will ever fucking love this mess #why am i even alive

[gl8m]

my life has been one misery after another and i quite literally cannot take anymore

#ætherspeak

[gl8m]

i fucking hate my family for real though

#ætherspeak #stop ruining my day #stop ruining my life #i gotta move the fuck away from here

[gl8m]

Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe

#ætherspeak #aristotle and dante discover the universe #ari and dante #aaddtsotu #text #literature #questioning my sexuality again #ok to rb

[gl8m]

i promise i will never let myself forget this burning feeling of shame and loneliness. i’ll never fool myself into believing i can ever be loved. i’ll never fool myself into believing i am not inherently different than the rest of the world. never again will i forget my place. i will never love again

#ætherspeak #deen #i asked her out. she said no of course. what else would she say #i looked her in the eyes too #i pity what she had to see #im unlovable #and i knew that ahead of time #so why was i still disappointed? as if i thought there was a real chance she’d say yes? #nobody in their roght mind would say yes #i thought that would stop me from catching feelings but it turns out i have to manually turn them off #so this is me doing that for good. never again will i let myself feel this way #never again will i let myself hope someone would love me #never. it can’t happen and i’ll never let myself believe otherwise #and that’s that #im cursed to walk on this earth with no one who loves me #i should just k¡ll myself #that would be a kinder fate

[gl8m]

Gender Failure by Rae Spoon & Ivan E Coyote

#text #gender #sexuality #butch #nonbinary #gender failure #rae spoon #ivan e coyote #I’ve been thinking so much about everything lately #lgbt books #intersectional feminism #ætherspeak #ok to rb

[gl8m]

im dying. im going to die. everything hurts. I should kïll mÿself

#ætherspeak