Match Found ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ - 4. foolin around (bonus round!)
Synopsis: Match Found ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ ( jungwon x reader) April Fools Special! random interactions that have no place in the plot. a mini present to thank u all for the love you've shown to the actual series ૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა ♡ Chapter 5 is out now!!
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warnings: mild cursing. crack,,, like the actual drug. not the genre. but also the genre too.
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a/n : hehe ... anyways chapter 5. #jungwonOUT! out now ☆૮꒰•༝ •。꒱ა . (half of these are from my brain n the other half is from the Internet) also double updating bc I have an exam on Tuesday so chapter 6 will most likely be delayed :(
enhypen & the ways they say "i love you"
(without actually saying it) ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
warnings : n/a : gen: fluff
a/n: im back?!? after almost 6 mths .. but yes i'm back, (finally..) school has been HELL, BUT yrhome is back in action, i hope this is alright even though i feel a little rusty hehe, reblogs & comments are very much appreciated
heeseung -> "this song reminded me of you."
- heeseung's love is constant, never once wavering. he sees you in every little part of his life.. he thinks about you constantly never once do you leave his mind he discovers a melody that seems to capture you within mere musical notes... so he shares it with you.. each song that make his heart swell just like you do.
jay -> "you wanted this right? i saw you looking at it at the store last weekend?"
- jay's love is bold yet gentle, almost like a first love and a last kiss paired in one. jay remembers everything about you, your favourite colour, which perfume you use, what shoe size you are, what makes you tick and what comforts you after a long day? so it's no surprise that when he caught you eyeing that lipstick at the store he just had to buy it for you, whatever makes you happy is all he wants.
jake -> "give me one more kiss, please babe just one more..??"
- jake's love is exhilerating and yet comfortable all at once, like the fond nostalgia of a childhood fair-ground ride. he should be out of bed right now, rushing to get ready for work but he can't help himself.. not when you look that damn beautiful laid in his arms , he kisses you softly letting the feeling linger. just one more kiss, he pleads.. but you both know that's never the case
sunghoon -> "have you eaten yet baby?"
- sunghoon's love is soft, sweet and it feels warm like a bowl of soup. he never fails to ask you whether you'd eaten yet, always. he takes comfort in knowing you're still safe and healthy. he shows his love through words, whispered confessions against your neck and gentle squeezes of your hip as he kisses you to sleep at night.
sunoo -> "i wish i could see you all the damn time"
- sunoo's love tastes like oranges and frozen grapes. he didn't think he'd ever want someone's company like he wants yours.. he needs you he wants you by his side even more with every passing minute. it feels almost natural to see your smile and your pretty eyes every minute of the day, it's like a second nature to him to admire you.
jungwon -> "i wanna grow old with you one day"
- jungwon's love is like rainy days spent cuddling next to the fire. he's never been one to shy away from the words 'i love you', but that's probably just because it's you. hell, love is terrifying but he knows you're the one for him. his other half the last little missing puzzle piece in his life, you're perfect for him.
niki -> "you make me wanna try."
- niki's love is like a gentle studio ghibli movie. it's not perfect but yet it still it. his love is encouragement, soft words of affection exchanged in private and heart-wrenching embraces that make you feel like melting. you're both young, and maybe thats completely okay, love is also helping the person you love most grow and change and still staying by each other's side.
𓆩 ♡ 𓆪 — bf!enha ( hyung ling ) x gn!reader
˚ʚ ♡ ɞ˚ — a/n : haven't done a reactions that wasn't requested for a while but here you go :) i didn't proof read this..
𓆩 ♡ 𓆪 — word count : 0.6k
heeseung :: hee would love to invite you over for a romantic dinner together but in the comfort of his own home. he found it so much more intimate and he loved the added bonus that he wouldnt have to share the privilege of seeing you with anyone else. only he got to see you under the dimly lit room by candles, rose petals surrounding you, and the tasteful aroma of a freshly cooked meal ( — by jay. heeseung didn’t know how to cook really good meals so he called his trusted friend to help him out ) floating in the air. It was during these slow, calm and intimate moments that heeseung realized how beautiful you were, how comfortable he felt with you and how safe it all made him feel. The night would most likely end with a deep and passionate kiss, hands roaming each others side, both trying to bring the other closer, as close as possible.
jongseong :: jay would be a dinner man too but he’d prefer to take you out to eat at a nice, luxurious restaurant. as a gentleman, he’d pick you up on time, walk up to your door and escort you to his car. he’d spend the whole night with at least one of his hands on you, wether it was laced with yours, settled on your waist or laid on your thighs when you were seated, his hands never left you. he’s the definition of romantic and rich so expect roses, a vip room, and he would pay for everything. he had gifted you with a brand new thin silver necklace which he helped put on, brushing your hair to the side, he struggled for a bit but as soon as he had the necklace locked, he laid a light feathery kiss on your neck, a kiss that would send chills down your back.
jaeyun :: jake would spend date nights with you out in the town, he loved to go festivals or attractions park when the sun came down. he’d have his fingers laced with yours all night and tuck his face in the crook of your neck in an attempt to warm up his beautiful features from the chilly night wind. You would go to the little lego shop, then those arcade like stands where you would both win each other plushies, you had bought him a small white cat plushie and he had won you one of those big teddy bears, which he offered to hold for you as it was a little heavy. You would get something to eat in a street food stand, the contrast of the hot food to the cold air, brought tears to your eyes and a burning mouth all while jake was laughing his head off at the sight.
sunghoon :: sunghoon prefers at home date nights, spent in each others arms under the thick covers you brought from your room to the living room. You spent the whole night cuddling close, your legs over his, one of his hands on your legs and the other one laid on your back, while you laid your head in his chest. Outside he might not be the most touchy person. All that switches once he walks through the door of your home, then he loves having you as close as he can. The night would consist of you watching your favourite movies, ordering food delivery from your favourite restaurants, and sleeping. You guys fell asleep watching your fourth movie of the night in each others embrace, waking up the next morning, lots of exchanged kisses.
can you do a reading on what enhypen members think of lesserafim
thought i'd do both groups ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
what do enhypen and le sserafim think about each other?
based on tarot. i do not know these idols personally. energies are always changing. what i say is NOT straight fact. pls take it with a grain of salt!
enhypen > le sserafim
heeseung 8ofp, knofc, 9ofw, queofp - phew, cards flew for him. he has a lot of thoughts for sure. views them as very hardworking and business-oriented women. also very stable financially. might've had a fling that ended on bad terms. some flirty energy and guardedness here.
jay 7ofc, knofc - sees them as a group with a lot of opportunities and choices. also get the flirty for energy for him, might be daydreaming a lot about someone in the group. he's definitely crushing. (leaning towards yunjin)
jake 4ofw, highpr - seems to get along with some of them pretty well and thinks they're a lot of fun, while other members might seem more mysterious and enigmatic to him. like they're more difficult to approach
sunghoon empr, 7ofc&world - thinks they're beautiful, sensual, feminine and gentle. believes they're great at realizing their abundance of opportunities, a wellrounded group
sunoo - god i'm sorry but the cards were so confusing and messy, very all over the place for him. i'm taking it as he just doesn't want me to know for now.
jungwon 4ofp, devil - might think they're kinda greedy and materialistic. they always want their way and can get selfish or manipulative sometimes. lowkey spoiled too
niki 7ofw, pagofc - seems to view them as very defensive and opinionated people who know how to stand up for themselves. also might have a little crush on someone, i'm getting cute little puppy love
le sserafim > enhypen
sakura devil, 9ofw, herm&6ofw - thinks they're kinda toxic. thinks both groups function better and are more successful when distanced, without getting in the way of eachother. she prefers just staying away from them to avoid drama
chaewon strengthrx, towerrx, hangm - thinks they're way too unstable and lack control of their emotions and power to stand up for themselves. might think they don't know how to progress because of that. i'm lowkey getting "company's favorite child" like they just do whatever they're told
yunjin lovers&4ofc, 2ofp+3ofc - seemed to have rejected someone lmao. might think they just play around too much and have too many girls/people they talk to. getting the vibe she just sees them as too immature still
kazuha death, 5ofp, 7ofc+kingofp - doesn't think about them much, like she literally doesn't enjoy the thought. ngl, there's some weird and heavy energy here i don't really wanna dive into further. she does acknowledge they're rich in opportunity though, and good at what they do
eunchae emper, knofsw, pagofsw - the only one i didn't get heavy energy from. thinks they're strong, reliable and passionate people. but might see them as kinda reckless and sharp-tongued in some ways. they can get too impulsive in her eyes. might be some gossiping going on here
the nine of wands seemed to be a reoccurring and significant card. i think a lot of the caution comes from wanting to avoid scandals, etc. they're probably aware a single glance can get overanalyzed by crazy fans, so they're more wary and conscious of how to behave around one another.
bottom of the deck in the end was the six of swords and it kept catching my eye somehow. so, i believe it's likely that they're also not really close off cam (def fought a bit, normal between co-workers tho) and might prefer staying distant in order to keep things peaceful.
☼ a/n: hi i love enha and i love beabadoobee. and i always think of them when i listen to her hehe. anyways enjoy, happy listening and let us know if u want more i was thinking this could be a cute “enha as songs” series <33
SUNOO
glue song - “i’ve never known someone like you” ✧˖°
this song sounds like summer sunshine and captures the beauty in young love and sunoo just embodies that energy. like he is so sunshine!! he’s just so pure and loving. he’s such a light and he makes everything brighter <3
JUNGWON
you’re here that’s the thing - ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
an angel actually. the most reliable person ever <3 he’s always there, whether that be comforting his members or even comforting engenes on weverse hehe. he’s the type to make u feel heard and supported. i feel like if you’re going through a hard time his mere presence is already enough to make u feel like everything’s going to be okay, like “at least ur here :(“
JAY
cologne - “you’re in my head” ☾⋆。𖦹 °✩
the angst in this song this is just so him. his cologne is SIGNATURE. it just lingers everywhere and u cannot get rid of it. and it leaves u not being able to stop thinking about him </3 also the guitar in this song?? his rockstar emo self would eat it up :’)
SUNGHOON
10:36 - “saw you in a dream last night” ☆⋆。𖦹°‧★
ANGST KING #2. he is ur mysterious quiet bsf that just keeps holding back to say what he wants to say, but one day he just decides to be bold. i feel like this song is so “laying in my bedroom stressing about a boy” and that boy u are stressing about? SUNGHOON. bc he just has that effect on u and u can’t understand why.
JAKE
soren - “if there was a place that i could call home, it’d be in your arms tonight” ₊˚✩彡
literally just a bf appreciation song because jake is just so boyfie coded. he has such a comforting and sweet presence and every little thing about him is just so loveable </3. it’s like all his members absolutely adore him. the way jungwon goes to him to feel at ease, and the way he cares for ni-ki god :’(. he is home. i miss my bf.
HEESEUNG
apple cider - “call me at midnight, lets give this thing a try” ⋆。˚୨୧˚。⋆
angst king #3. this song is SO OMFG. gives off the vibes that he’s obviously in love with you but doesn’t want to admit it so he just silently admires. he does such subtle things that are so :$;&:$): like he would compliment ur sweater randomly and now ur wearing it every day. (just like the song lol) he would so randomly call u late at night just cus he wanted to talk to you and it’ll leave u so perplexed like HEESEUNG WHAT ARE WE??
NI-KI
ripples - “so i’m keeping busy, work twice as hard as you” ⋆.ೃ࿔*:・
riki is such a hard worker :(. he is so hard on himself !! he’s been through so much at such a young age and this song so beautifully captures the feeling of growing out of a hateful place and paying homage to the hard work that got you there. i feel like now he’s in a much better place and he can smile and actually live his teenage years with his members. i love him so much.
▬▬ GENRE : fluff // slight angst if you squint !!
▬▬ WARNINGS : none !!
✧ user yeeun : just a short reaction! i dont know if anyone could tell but i genuinely missed writing reactions but my energy just isn't it <//3
⌗ .. heeseung !!
❝ everyone started panicking. but the way your boyfriend panicked was on another level 😭
❝ starts apologizing with jay while wiping your tears away!! who knew that switching the lights off would be a big mistake?
❝ “you know that im terrified of being alone in the dark!” you sniffle
❝ “y/n! i really didn’t want to make you cry im sorry!”
❝ and this time, luck wasn’t on their side.. especially when your manager walked in and began scolding them for an hour straight <//3
⌗ .. jay !!
❝ throwing a fake cockroach at you seemed like a fun idea :’DD
❝ oh boy, when jay saw you failing to hold your tears in, i swearrr
❝ he was mad mad mad !!!
❝ wonie and the others would wonder why he was scolding jake and when he explains what happened, they immediately scold him too 😭
❝ but still, remember that coupon for a luxury hotel that jake won? he made it up to you both by letting you two use it instead !!! ヾ(*'▽'*)
⌗ .. jake !!
❝ pulling pranks were a normal thing between you all. but really? while watching a horror movie?
❝ jake didn’t mind it when sunghoon followed you to the bathroom. well.. that was until he heard sniffling
❝ “y/n??” they all call out and all the heard was hoon apologizing.
❝ you swore that it was the first time you’ve seen your boyfriend so… serious
❝ you’d be in jake’s embrace for the next few hours and he wouldn’t even stop glaring at the culprit that made you cry 😭
⌗ .. sunghoon !!
❝ he wouldn’t even know if he wants to scold jungwon 😭
❝ jungwon does admit that it is his fault for making you cry, though!
❝ hoon never expected his leader to be the first member to make you cry too !!
❝ would still kinda suck at trying to comfort you but it’s enough to make you stop crying anyway <//3
❝ he still teases you afterwards though !! (*°ー°)ノ
⌗ .. jungwon !!
❝ he’d try his best to act quickly but the poor boy also needs time to process everything that just happened!
❝ he never expected sunoo to be able to make you cry, after all
❝ but when he found out that you also hurt your hand when you got startled, he did get mad too.
❝ would be focused on giving you all the comfort you need first!
❝ although.. once you stop crying… sunoo would probably be the next one to cry /j
⌗ .. sunoo !!
❝ naurrr niki swore that his whole life flashed before his eyes 💀
❝ wouldn’t even try to hold back !!
❝ “YAH! YOU MADE MY Y/N CRY!!!”
❝ spends the rest of the time trying to make you smile even if it means needing to do an aegyo (which isn’t even a problem since he gladly does it anyway)
❝ probably even makes niki apologize to you too many times 😭
⌗ .. niki !!
❝ whenever he sees you upset, he’d normally just laugh it out.
❝ but this time was different, the prank his heeseung hyung did made you cry and niki couldn’t even force a laugh.
❝ he didn’t even know that the oldest member would be able to make you cry 😭
❝ still, your boyfriend also loved the idea of pranking you which is why he also started to apologize!!
❝ heeseung would make it up to you by paying for your meals for the rest of the week and niki… well, he’d make you cuddle with him as he then says how sorry he is for making you cry <//3
Synopsis: Jungwon is sick of his friends' constant teasing over his lack of gaming skills. Determined to secretly improve and prove enha wrong, Jungwon sets out to learn to play, except he has no clue where to begin. Luckily for him, y/n is a girl with too much time on her hands, a desperate need for distraction and is more than happy to indulge him. Only, things are never that simple and Jungwon soon finds it difficult to explain exactly what the pair have become.
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smau + (3.3k) written work (srry lol i have no excuse )
warnings: mentions of death and parental neglect. mentions of injury and blood. cursing.
“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I gotta go,” Jungwon curses to himself as he hops around the room, pulling on his sneakers and grabbing his hoodie off of his chair. Running his fingers through his hair, Jungwon spins aimlessly in the middle of his room, eyes darting around frantically for a glimpse of his keys and wallet.
Fucking hell. I don't have time for this. I'll just text someone to let me in tomorrow. Jungwon abandons the seemingly impossible task and bursts out of his room, startling Heeseung who looks up at him through a mouthful of ramen.
“Hyung, I need your car. I'll bring it back sometime tomorrow. Where are your keys? Jungwon asks, feet tapping impatiently against the floor.
Heeseung only stares back in wide eyed confusion, swallowing harshly. "Woah Jungwon, you good? Where are you even heading out this late?"
Jungwon groans in exasperation, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Look hyung, I need to get to Y/N's right now. It's important and I'm worried. Can we please save the story time for later? Either give me your keys or I'm just gonna run there."
Heeseung' stare softens at Jungwon's anxious demeanor and he pushes away from the table, standing up. "I'll drive you, it's not safe for you to be on the road when you're this worked up. Come on, let's go"
Jungwon doesn't wait for Heeseung to finish his sentence, walking briskly out the door without a second glance. Heeseung gives his half eaten bowl of ramen one last doleful look "I'll be back for you baby girl,” sighing as he follows Jungwon out.
The car ride is tense to say the least. Any attempts of making jokes or small talk are quickly shut down by a sharp glare from the passenger seat. Jungwon knows he's being irrational, that Heeseung is doing him a favor and he should be grateful and much nicer. But the hammering of his heart against his ribs won’t allow him to act rationally and he knows that Heeseung understands, he always does. So Jungwon vows to thank him and apologize properly later but for now, he allows his mind to be consumed by thoughts of you.
As the car finally turns down the familiar street of your place, Jungwon's fingers drum insistently against his bouncing thigh. His energy begging to be expended as he resists the urge to just jump out of the car and run up all 42 flights to your side. A gentle pat on his shoulder brings him back to reality, and Jungwon turns to meet his friend's warm gaze.
"Don't worry Jungwon. Y/N seems like a strong girl. I'm sure she’s fine. And even if she's not, she will be eventually." Heeseung says softly.
Jungwon nods stiffly, willing himself to believe Heeseung's words.You were fine. You had to be. "You can pull over here hyung, it's that building. Thanks for taking me" he mutters quietly, unbuckling his seatbelt.
"Alright Jungwon, do you want me to wait for you out here? Or go up with you?" Heeseung asks as the car rolls to a stop.
"No. Go home hyung. I'll see you tomorrow." Jungwon says firmly and takes off in a brisk jog.
Knowing he was almost at his destination did nothing to calm the jitters that ran down his spine. If anything, it just spurred him to run even faster, ignoring the curious looks he got as he moved through the familiar lobby, dashing into the waiting elevator.
Come on, come on, come on. Y/N why the fuck do you have to live all the way at the top. The numbers on the elevator ascend at a tortuous pace and Jungwon feels as if he might just lose his mind. The chime of the doors opening finally puts him out of his misery and Jungwon sends up a silent prayer that Chenle was right about your code as he punches it into the keypad.
A green flash assures Jungwon that his luck hadn’t run out completely and he walks in, blinking as his eyes adjust to the darkness. Your house is eerily silent, only illuminated by the lights of the metropolis outside your windows.
"Y/N?" Jungwon calls out anxiously, moving towards your room, receiving no answer in return. Jungwon’s ears prick at the faint sobs coming from the opposite direction and he goes to your living room to find you sitting on the floor staring out the large windows. He approaches you cautiously, there's a crunch under the boot of his shoe and Jungwon looks down in confusion to find the marble covered in shards of glass and swirls of red fluid. For a moment, Jungwon’s heart drops to his stomach but he breathes a sigh of relief as the astringent smell hits his nose and he realizes the culprit is wine.
Your head turns away from the cityscape at the sound of crushed glass, brows knitting in confusion when you find Jungwon staring back at you.
"Jungwon? What are you doing here?" You ask breathily, eyes dilating as you take in his appearance.
He rakes his eyes over your figure, scanning for any trace of injury and for a second Jungwon is at a loss for words. Your eyes are rimmed red, cheeks still streaked with the remnants of tears and yet Jungwon can’t help the way his breath hitches at the sight of you under the moonlight. It’s almost hauntingly beautiful and he’s not sure he’ll ever be able to forget how you look up at him that night.
"Chenle told me what happened. ,” Jungwon starts carefully, “Your friends said that you weren't answering their calls. I was- We were worried about you,"Jungwon amends.
Your eyes prick at the reminder of what exactly had gotten you into your current state. You wipe furiously at your eyes, glaring out the window. "He shouldn't have bothered you with this shit. I'm sorry you had to come all this way Jungwon, I was just being stupid and dramatic."
A mix of shame and anger swirls at the pit of your chest at the realization that once again you had troubled and burdened your friends. You know better, you silently reprimand yourself, chewing on the inside of your cheek.
You push yourself up to your feet, ignoring Jungwon's warnings in your haste to get up. "I'll message them. You can go home I'm fine-" you wince, your words halting at the feeling of a sharp sting against your palm.
In a flash, Jungwon is by your side, firmly grabbing your wrist. "I told you to be careful. You are not fine. And I am not going to go home." He says firmly, staring into your eyes with a steely gaze.
Dumbly, you nod back at him and he huffs, looking down and examining the beads of blood that have begun to pool in the crevices of your palm. "It doesn't look that deep but we should still disinfect it and wrap it. Do you have a first aid kit?"
"In my room," you mutter . And Jungwon hums, promptly picking you up bridal style ignoring the startled gasp that escapes your lips. “There's glass on the floor," Jungwon cuts you off before you can protest, carrying you over to your room.
He pushes the door open deftly with his shoulder, setting you down on your bed. You look at him with slight amusement, entertained by how seriously Jungwon was taking his job as your caretaker.
He looks at you expectantly and you smile, “The kit’s in my bedside table, second drawer,” you offer helpfully, to which he nods and begins rummaging through your cabinet.
Unable to resist teasing any longer, you clear your throat and speak up, “You know you could've just gotten me my slippers or something instead of carrying me Jungwon,” you smirk.
You laugh as he visibly pauses mid search, mumbling a "shut up", his ears glowing a faint red. Jungwon brings the first aid kit over to you, batting your hand away as you try to take it from him.
"I can do it," you offer, pursing your lips as Jungwon deadpans at you, pulling your injured hand into his lap. "Your dominant hand is literally cut and bleeding Y/N. How are you going to disinfect and bandage this big ass gash with only one hand?"
"I’ve seen people do it all the time in movies, it can’t possibly be that hard. I’ll be fine,” you whine, trying to yank your hand away from his grasp.
Jungwon scoffs, flicking your forehead, "Stop being stubborn and just let me take care of you."
"I don't know if I can trust you to take care of me if you're assaulting your patients like this," you pout, rubbing your forehead. "At least put on a sexy nurse costume or something, it’ll make you look more reliable.”
Jungwon doesn't dignify your joke with a response, focusing instead on your wound. He carefully wipes away the blood, checking for any stray pieces of glass. With a warning, he gently presses the antiseptic to your cut, whispering an apology when you wince. He diligently bandages your hand, turning it over and tracing the bandage gingerly to make sure it's entirely secure. You watch wordlessly as Jungwon’s fingers graze the curves of your hands and fingers, his touch feather light.
Looking up at your uncharacteristic silence, Jungwon’s not quite sure what to make of the emotions that pool in your eyes. There’s a foreign intensity behind them and his eyes can't help but flicker down to your lips. The air is stifling and Jungwon wants nothing more than to close the distance, to draw the air he so desperately needs from your lips.
Instead, he opts to look away, coughing awkwardly. "All done. You should probably change" he gestures to your wine stained dress. You look at him in contemplation, noting the slight flush on the back of his neck, watching as his Adam's apple bobs up and down as he swallows, eyes trained on your wall.
Taking pity on him, you walk towards your dresser, letting the tension dissipate into the stale air. You rifle through your clothes, pulling out a pair of shorts and an oversized tee that either Chenle or Haechan had left behind during your group sleepovers.
“Turn around, I’m gonna change,” you warn half-heartedly, waiting for a beat before starting to tug your dress over your head. Jungwon immediately turns, busying himself with his phone. He shoots both Chenle and Heeseung a text, assuring both of them that everything was alright, desperately trying to block out the sounds of rustling fabric behind him.
Jungwon keeps his head bowed, eyes glued to his screen until he feels the bed dip next to him and a slight tug on the hem of his shirt. “You texted Chenle?” you ask casually, humming when he nods in confirmation.
You try to feign nonchalance but struggle to meet Jungwon’s eyes as you prepare yourself for the conversation ahead. “So, he told you?”
"Yeah." Jungwon admits quietly.
"About what happened today? Or everything.”
"Everything."
"Hm, I see.” you fiddle absentmindedly with Jungwon’s shirt, pulling at the stray threads in the frayed ends.
“I'm sorry that he told me. And I'm sure Chenle's sorry he had to tell me as well. He was just worried about you,” Jungwon prods tentatively, unsure of your reaction.
“No, I know. I get it. It’s my fault for not responding and putting him in that position in the first place.” you let out a puff of frustration. “ I just wish I could've told you everything on my terms, explained properly. This wasn’t how I wanted you to find out.”
Jungwon tucks your hair behind your ear, nudging you encouragingly, “Then do it. Explain it to me how you would’ve if today didn’t happen.”
You take a deep breath, instinctively reaching out to play with Jungwon’s fingers for a sense of comfort and give him a wobbly smile.
“So, like Chenle told you, my mom passed away a few days after giving birth to me. There were some complications during the procedure and she never recovered.
I know that my dad resents me for her death. That if he had the choice he would've chosen her over me. And I can't really blame him. The woman he fell in love with and built a whole life around, gone, and just for a baby he didn't have any attachment to yet.
At first I didn’t really understand the situation, so I did everything I could just to get even a speck of his attention. But as I grew older, I pieced together the truth from the whispers from my nannies and my dad’s staff. And then it became more than just looking for his attention, I felt like I had to prove my worth somehow. I had to prove that I wasn't just useless, that my mom hadn't given up her life for me just to amount to nothing.
I wanted to make him believe that her choice was justified. I don't think I'll ever be able to get my dad to think so. I’ve known that for a long time.” You draw a shaky breath, tears streaming down your cheeks slowly. Jungwon’s heart clenches at the sight and he pulls you into his lap, rubbing your back soothingly as you try to continue.
“But then something like this happens, he gives me the slightest indication that something might change. And it's like I'm 7 years old all over again. On that stage holding a stupid trophy that's bigger than me. Flashing lights and photographers, searching in a sea of faces for the one person that will never be there.”
“And I'm so, so, tired of being disappointed,” your voice cracks with emotion, “Tired of even having any expectations. It happens every time.”
“ He left. He knew that I was waiting for him and he just left. With nothing but a stupid bottle of wine as a gift. Not a note that said happy birthday, or even goodbye.” you mutter bitterly.
Your vision blurs with hot, angry tears, “He's never once wished me happy birthday. That's all I ever wanted from him. But he can’t give me that, he thinks spending money will help us both ignore the reality that he can’t stand to be around me. So I’m left with a bottle of wine that's as old as me and probably costs more than someone’s yearly salary. Another reminder of everything he's given me and everything I will never amount to in his eyes.”
“And I was just so mad, I picked it up and threw it against the wall. I only ended up making a huge mess and getting hurt so I guess my plan backfired,” you laugh sardonically.
“I probably should've sold it or given it to Chenle, so that was stupid of me but I just couldn't look at it anymore,” your voice dies into a soft whisper.
Jungwon tilts your face up to meet his gaze, brushing away the stray tears in the corners of your eyes.
"Happy Birthday Y/N . I'm so glad that you're here and that I’m able to be by your side. Even if that means running across the city in the middle of the night" He says, knocking his forehead against yours affectionately.
You give a watery laugh, eyes welling up at the sincerity in his tone. You lean your forehead onto Jungwon's shoulder "Thanks Yang Jungwon, it means a lot. I'm sorry for getting tears and snot all over your hoodie"
Jungwon snorts in response, smoothing over your hair, “Occupational hazard of being your best friend I guess.”
Best friend. You laugh to yourself at the absurdity of the situation. It was insane how in such a short amount of time Jungwon has carved out a space for himself in your heart. Your smile fades, your mood sobering slightly as doubts begin to creep back into the corners of your mind.
"Hey Jungwon?" you ask hesitantly.
"Yeah Y/N?"
You’re unable to meet Jungwon’s questioning gaze, resolving to play with the strings of his hoodie instead. “You’ll tell me right if I'm being too much? Before you’re sick of me?” you ask softly.
Jungwon leans back to look at your face with furrowed brows, “What the fuck are you on about Y/N, I’m not gonna get sick of you.”
You swat at Jungwon’s arm lightly, “You can't say that for sure. Everyone has limits and boundaries and unfortunately I have a tendency of finding those limits and pushing them unknowingly.”
You gesture to yourself with a wave of your hand. “This whole parental trauma, daddy issues thing, it can be a lot. And I have a bad habit of being overly attached and clingy to people. It's suffocating, I know. So just tell me okay? I’d rather know and dial it back than push you away and lose you entirely.”
Jungwon sighs and pulls you closer, placing a chaste kiss on your temple. “You're being ridiculous Y/N that's not gonna happen. I could never get sick of you. If anything you'll be sick of me.”
“Just promise me? Please?”
He rolls his eyes in exasperation, “Fine. If I wake up one day and decide that I’m suddenly sick of you, I promise you’ll be the first to know”.
“Thanks Wonnie”, you smile in satisfaction, stifling a yawn behind the back of your hand.
"Aww, is my birthday girl tired?” he teases gently, glancing at your clock. 2:14 A.M.
“You should go to sleep now Y/N" Jungwon shifts you so that you’re laying on the bed and you quickly situate yourself under the blankets. Once he’s tucked you into your bed sufficiently, Jungwon stands with a slight stretch, ignoring the way his muscles protest at the movement.
You cock your head in confusion, tugging him back by the sleeve of his hoodie "You're not staying?”
Jungwon blinks at you blankly, “I am, I'll just take the floor. Or the couch.”
You smile sleepily up at him, "Don't be stupid Jungwon." You scoot over, lifting the blanket and patting the empty space next to you in invitation.
Jungwon merely gapes at you in response and you snicker at his vacant expression.
“Jungwon, we literally cuddle in bed all the time, it's no different just because it's nighttime. Look, I'll even stay on my side of the bed okay?” You scoot back further to the edge of your bed, looking at him expectantly.
Wordlessly Jungwon huffs, kicking off his shoes and shedding his hoodie. He clambers into your bed, exhaling lowly as he turns to face you.
From the gap across the bed Jungwon watches as you give him a pleased smile, cheek squishing into the pillow and your hair splaying out behind you. He can't look away from the way your eyes shine in moonlight, staring back at him with a fondness that makes his heart stutter.
“Night night, Wonnie," you whisper playfully, reaching out to lightly pinch at Jungwon's cheek.
His eyes flutter close at the feeling of the pads of your fingers against his cheek and he groans internally.
Fuck it. Jungwon rolls his eyes in surrender, and pulls you closer to him, tucking you into the crook of his neck, a position that's way too familiar to him at this point.
And maybe Jungwon really should reevaluate where he's at because the way his hand slides to rest at the small of your back is all too natural. And the feeling of your breath against his neck should really be unsettling but it’s not.
He really should think about it, but right now it's nearly 3 AM and he doesn't have the energy to question how perfectly you fit against him. How you feel a bit too much like home.
“What happened to me staying on my side of the bed,” you ask slyly in the most innocent tone you can muster. Jungwon can feel your barely concealed smile against his collarbone and punishes your taunt with a swift tug at your hair, enticing a snicker from your lips.
"Shut up and go to sleep" he grumbles, and you laugh freely, burrowing comfortably into his arms. Jungwon can’t help but let his lips lift at the sound, and tightens his hold around you, waiting until he hears the faint puffs of your slumber before letting himself succumb to his dreams.
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a/n: chenle rlly is jungwon's biggest supporter asjks carrying the y/nwon ship.
my longest chapter yet hhh i hope y'all enjoyed . I kinda cringed but :) lmk ur thoughts n feelings . Jett voice: night night!