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#「ᵀᴸ」— arc iv. a little breeze kindles
goldencored · 2 years
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@feietouhuo​ said,  ❝  eventually,  you just gotta learn to let go of the past.  it’s always gonna hurt,  but you can choose when to start focusing on something other than the pain.  ❞
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“General Xuan Zhen makes it sound so easy,” she mumbles in return, toeing at loose gravel with the tip of her shoe. For her, the past was still an open wound, still festering and oozing no matter how she tried to clean it or patch it up. “And as if he has a lot of experience with it.” Shi Fei looks up at him, letting a little of the tiredness she feels show. “How did you do it? How do you stop thinking about... everything? How do you let go through the guilt and the blame?”
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goldencored-arc · 3 years
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@aeipathic​ said: is it awful that i’m enjoying it? ( xie lian @ sqx ! )
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A quiet little giggle escapes her and she shakes her head. There hasn’t been much for her to laugh about since her fall from grace— not with her beggar gang nor with any few and far between visitors. But this? This is more than enough to bring a smile to her face.
“Not at all! And if it is, then we’ll be awful together.” She resists the urge to bump shoulders with Xie Lian, not wanting to dirty up his pristine white robes.
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goldencored · 2 years
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@jaxxmulti​ said, ❛ what kind of life have you known ? ❜ / sqx & hx
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Considering the ruined temple, the pain in her near useless leg, the pain in her arm, the hunger in her belly— her fall from grace hadn’t been pretty. Life on the streets of the capital was hard, made harder by her injuries. Unlike some of the other beggars, she couldn’t easily make money. Her injuries prevented her from busking, after all.
The most A-Feng could do was watch over the gang’s children and do little chores while the others were away.
“One that I deserve,” she replies at last, picking at a tear in her dirty, ratty robes.
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goldencored · 2 years
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@jaxxmulti​ said,  ❛ did you think that i had left you for good ? ❜ / hx & sqx
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Shifting slightly, she stretches out her bad leg, wincing ever so slightly at how stiff it’s gotten. Soon enough she’ll have to get up and limp out the stiffness, but right now, she remains seated on the steps of the ruined temple. Why had he slithered out of the darkness now? Long after every thing had settled? A-Feng gives a little shrug, staring off into the city, not meeting his gaze. “You dumped me here with nothing, Lord Blackwater, half out of my mind. Of course I thought you’d left for good, since I haven’t really seen you since. What else was I supposed to think?”
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goldencored · 2 years
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@violetire​ said,  ❛  why  do  you  look  so  guilty ?  ❜ sqx
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Leaning against her cane, she stares idly up at the vine covered statues. They aren’t in the best shape— chipped and dirty, and of course overgrown. Though she’s been coming here near daily to make it habitable for the beggars around the town, she hasn’t yet tried to clean the statues, or even attempted to touch them. 
Shi Fei sweeps around them, and for as much as she tries to avoid the figures, she still catches herself staring. Sect Leader Jiang catching her, though, is even worse!
Giving her signature nervous laugh, she waves it off, turning her back to the crumbling pair. “Hm? I look guilty? Weird. I guess I was just lost in thought.”
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goldencored · 2 years
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@dreams-of-fate​ said, ❛ don’t let me lose you too. ❜ (pm @ sqx)
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Being stabbed as a mortal is markedly different than being stabbed as a god. Like this, she feels heavy, she can feel the life slowly draining out of her as the blood continues to flow. If she’s being honest, Shi Fei didn’t think she’d die like this— slowly and frighteningly aware. In her darkest hours, she’d hoped for a quick death, something abrupt and painless, like in her sleep or even a violent end like her brother’s.
Certainly not during some reckless act of heroism, certainly not from too stab wounds to the chest and stomach. It hurts to breathe, to talk. But at least not alone like she imagined she would be. Ol’ Pei is here, more upset than she’s ever heard him.
Was he like this when he found her brother? Worse? She takes a shuddering, wet breath, and there’s blood on her lips now. Still, she tries her best to smile, even though her eyes feel heavy.
“Pei-gege, I don’t think... I really have a choice. But maybe... maybe in the next life you’ll find me again. Maybe things’ll be better. I—” Shi Fei’s fingers curl into the fabric of his robes, and she makes a pained little whimper as she shifts to rest her head against his chest. “Thank you... for taking care of me, Pei-gege.” 
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goldencored · 2 years
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@violetire​ said, “Well, I’ll see you in the morning.” sqx
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A-Feng isn’t used to being clean or having a bed to sleep in. Time is a strange thing now— as a god, ten years was but a blink of the eye but now that she’s fallen from grace, the years have stretched on. She can’t remember the soft silks she used to wear or all the pretty pins she used to put her hair up with. Once itchy to sensitive skin, the dirty and patched robes feel like a second skin. 
She tries not to think about how easy it is to forget when things are no longer there.
Awkwardly, she sits on the bed in the guest room that Jiang-zongzhu set aside for her, looking up at him hesitantly, kicking her bare feet idly. It really is nice, having clean robes, ones with no holes and the grime washed off of her.
“Thank you. For letting me stay.”
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goldencored · 2 years
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@numinousdread​ said,  “ it didn’t mean anything to me.  ” shen zechuan @ whomever uwu
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“Oh, I didn’t expect it would!” She gives an easy shrug, leaning on her crutch for support. Her leg always acted up more in the winter, and today was no different. 
“But I was hoping that maybe you had a coin or two to spare for bread. Those little ones over there are hungry, you see, and I might’ve promised them I’d help get them some food.”
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goldencored · 3 years
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dump three.
#「ᵀ」— the snake will always bite back ( yu daiyu )#「ᵛ」— every great story begins with a snake#「ᵀᴸ」— arc i. little glittering scales#「ᵀᴸ」— arc ii. never wound a snake; kill it#「ᵀᴸ」— arc iii. shed the past like a snake sheds skin#「ᵛ」— black jade; dark as the night sky#「ᵀᴸ」— arc i. moonless night#「ᵀ」— look like a flower; be the serpent beneath ( yu yanmei )#「ᵛ」— toughness of a serpent; softness of a dove#「ᵀᴸ」— arc i. born into a viper pit#「ᵀᴸ」— arc ii. even snakes cannot trust snakes#「ᵀᴸ」— arc iii. cast off the past skin#「ᵀᴸ」— arc iv. pretend to be venomous#「ᵀ」— o wind; where have you been that you blow so sweet? ( shi qingxuan )#「ᵛ」— a breeze will always blow in the direction it wishes to go#「ᵀᴸ」— arc i. gentle; like a breeze in spring#「ᵀᴸ」— arc ii. heavy winds stir the veil of fate#「ᵀᴸ」— arc iii. the wind shrieks; the wind grieves#「ᵀᴸ」— arc iv. a little breeze kindles#「ᵛ」— where the celestial breeze blows#「ᵀᴸ」— arc i. black swan among a sea of white#「ᵛ」— they sow the wind and shall reap the whirlwind#「ᵀᴸ」— arc i. if you cage the wind will it die?#「ᵀᴸ」— arc ii. the tempest; raging and roaring#「ᴿ」— ♡ ❛ the red string may tangle but will never break ❜ ( shuangxuan )#「ᵀ」— be wary of the scorpion's sting ( xie wang )#「ᵛ」— a gamble in the game of fate#「ᵀᴸ」— arc i. child in a gambler's den#「ᵀᴸ」— arc ii. into a pit of scorpions#「ᵀᴸ」— arc iii. like the scorpion surrounded by fire
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goldencored-arc · 3 years
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             “—Sorry!” 
     Maybe she should’ve been paying a little more attention to where her cane struck the ground as she shuffled along, enjoying the sights and sounds of the market. It isn’t like she can afford anything from any of the stalls, so she shouldn’t have been so distracted. Now she’s gone and slammed the tip of her cane into someone’s poor foot.
             “I wasn’t looking,” she admits, sheepish. “I really am sorry!”
                                                               // open starter! mutuals only!
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goldencored-arc · 4 years
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⤷ S h i  Q i n g x u a n    ⤷ @ashbound​ ( pm )
       ⤷  “You must be tired. You’ve been running through my mind all day long.” 
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 “Pei-ge!” 
Qingxuan admonishes, though the attempt is half hearted at best. The fondness in her tone doesn’t help matters— though she does at least turn her head to try and hide her smile.
A lifetime ago, these things would’ve infuriated her— made her huff, stamp her foot, and then go running to Ge. She remembers a time when Ge warned her of Pei Ming’s charm. At the time, Qingxuan laughed it off, told Ge not to worry— that she would be the only lady never swayed by that charm.
Now she’s eating those words, and Ge is very likely rolling in his grave.
“Now, now. None of that!” She struggles to stand, finally facing him, hoisting the laundry basket onto her hip. “I am tired though, so it’s a good thing you’re here! Now you can carry all this laundry for me!”
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goldencored · 2 years
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@dreams-of-fate​ said:  Fei Fei giving the best girl a kiss. :3
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Eyes wide, A-Feng stares at Li-guniang in utter shock. It isn’t easy to leave the former windmaster speechless, even now, and yet Fei Fei seems to have done the impossible. Though it’s slow to start, an unmistakable cherry red flush spreads from the tips of her ears down to her neck, and likely below the collar of her dirtied robes.
“You...? I... oh,” she sputters, still trying to regain her bearings and failing miserably. How silly she must look right now, unable to respond. The urge to cover her face and hide her shyness is oh so tempting.
Instead, she chooses to be brave, to do the one thing she can think of to respond properly, to make sure Li-guniang knows her reaction is a positive one. A-Feng leans in and presses a chaste kiss upon Fei Fei’s lips—
And then bolts like a frightened rabbit.
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goldencored · 2 years
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@safaerax​ said:  Xie Lian is here to give her a peck on the cheek~ <3 happy v-day !
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She laughs, wrinkling her nose. A rare, genuine smile tugs at her lips and even dares to reach her eyes. “Xie-ge, what have I told you? You’re going to get all dirty if you keep doing things like that. Then your Crimson Rain won’t be very happy with me.”
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goldencored-arc · 3 years
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⤷ S h i  Q i n g x u a n    ⤷ @ashbound​ (mq)
      ⤷  'Some people don’t understand anything.'
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         Some things still hit a little too close to home, a little too close for comfort. This happens to be one of those things. But Qingxuan has long since gotten used to not wearing his heart— nor his emotions— on his sleeve like he once may have. Instead he offers a little smile and lowers his head.
        “Some people don’t care to understand anything. I think being willfully ignorant is even worse than being naïve or stupid.”
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goldencored-arc · 3 years
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⤷ S h i  Q i n g x u a n   ⤷ @ashbound​ ( pm )
     ⤷  ' you never know what people have up their sleeves. '
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      Pausing in her mending, Qingxuan glances up at Pei Ming, trying in vain to keep her little smile at bay. “Oh? And what does the great General Ming Guang have up his sleeve this visit?”
       If he wants to tease, to keep her in suspense, she has no qualms about teasing in return— especially if it makes him, of all people, flustered. “Come, come! Show me or sit and help me finish mending these.”
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goldencored-arc · 4 years
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⤷ S h i  Q i n g x u a n    ⤷ @ashbound​ ( swd )
       ⤷  “I’m proud of you, you know that?”
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Ten years in the mortal realm is a long time. The days seem to drag on slowly, especially for someone like them, whom usually only has a handful of coins to spare and even then they usually give those coins to someone who needs a meal more. When a belly is hungry, to the point of aching, time slips even more slowly. Yet they don’t complain. This is the fate they should’ve had all along, this is the punishment of their crime. All they can do is make the most of it.
Things aren’t easy. Perhaps they would be easier were their injuries not so severe. Making money is hard with two lame limbs, but they try their best. At least some are more sympathetic towards a charismatic girl with a pretty face than they would be otherwise. It feels a little cheap, but they have mouths to feed— their own and their little band of homeless. Other bands look to them too, for guidance and in thanks. There are quite a few old abandoned shrines that Qingxuan’s done their best to fix up around the city, to make them livable for others like them. 
Still, the sands of time flow slowly, and things Qingxuan once remembered so well seem to be slipping away unbidden. Even in their nightmares now, they can’t quite remember the sound of their brother’s voice— something they never thought they would forget. Even the shouting, the guttural screaming sounds somehow off.
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But with a few well placed words, their memory is jogged, and their good hand comes up as if to shield themselves from those eyes. Never did they want their brother to see them like this. Though they’ve long become used to this life, to their injuries, it’s somehow different when it’s Shi Wudu. Embarrassing. Shameful. 
( In the beginning, it was like that with Pei Ming, too, but those times have long since passed. ) “Don’t be proud. I haven’t done enough, not yet!”
For a moment, however, they hesitate. Is this real? They haven’t had a hallucination in years and years, yet they still worry that their mind has conjured this up for some cruel reason. Or perhaps someone is playing a terrible joke.
Except—
There are rumors that come from merchants traveling from city to city, speaking of a ghost that haunts old Wind and Water shrines, that kills and curses any who dare burn them or demolish them. A ghost that can make the water heed it’s commands.
“Ge... what took you so long?”
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