#''cranky that you couldn't interact with someone'' WHAT

[lesbienyu]

another female ancestors art find. we have thousands of slides like this from my late grandmother, my dad's mom. she never stepped foot in minnesota, but we inherited her old photographs. there's boxes of these and developed photos. we still have her camera from the fifties. she went to college, uncommon for women at the time, esp of her social standing. she kept geese, longhorns, snapping turtles, and mean little dogs- all were hell but the cattle, but they loved her and no one else. she gave me her violin, because our family always plays music. it was a big compliment- I was ten, couldn't play a damn thing for shit, and she thought I was smart enough for the violin. I wasn't lol, music gene skipped me, but it meant a lot to her and a lot to me that she gave it to me. she also gave me my first poetry books. she was smart as a whip and everyone always calls her mean. I don't think she was mean, so much as fed up, from what I remember of her. her husband ran a machine shop, but she insisted on running an antique store "in case he fudged it." she kept all the antiques when she retired.

my uncle bought he a rifle every holiday of the year for decades. my sister and I would stand and play "spot the rifle" when we visited as kids. incredibly texan child's game, for sure. my family acts like she was just a paranoid gun nut (which she was), but she also spent decades taking thousands of pictures of everything she thought beautiful. for every five family pictures she took, there's a good twenty of landscapes, of animals, of storefronts and scenery, that looked beautiful to her. photography wasn't cheap back then, and the pictures she took make me think back on my interactions with her, with the books she gave me. she gave me Tennyson, and, when I look at her photographs, I wonder if she thought of the Lake Isle of Innisfree. shed stare at her cattle for hours, looking at the live oaks and the small pond and tumbleweeds. she'd sit with a pile of disposable cameras when I was a kid and would snap random tree branches and flowers. I thought she was wasteful- it was the early 2000s, and it still wasn't the cheapest to develop disposables, especially on the same tree you see every day. I think I was missing the point

women's art, even if it's "mundane" as some landscape photographs, speak to their mental state. she liked looking at nature. she wanted to document it. she never took pictures of anything beyond the desert, the plains, the harsh, hot environment she grew up in. she liked reading poetry about it, so she handed down books. she liked animals that didn't like people, with her geese and snapping turtles, and took them into her home. there was something there that adored hostility, that loved the coarse, roughness of nature. but, of course, she was just a cranky old woman, a mother and a wife. not someone with a camera, looking at cacti and barren fields and seeing beauty.

#diary #gyns I'm connecting w my female ancestors through art tonight #radblr

[randomrabbidramblings]

Random's "The Super Mario Bros Movie" Review

My quick toughts on the fly weren't enough so his is a longer, more "serious" review.

Obviously, SPOILERS!

So let's start with the negatives since there are so few of them.

The pacing feels kind of rushed, sometimes we jump from scene to scene too quickly and the interactions between the characters are also a bit too fast (like Mario and Donkey Kong becoming friends so quickly in a "I saved you, you saved me" kind of thing). As a lot of people said: the movie really needed an extra 15 minutes.

Some of the characters are very plain, especially Toad. He is very underdeveloped compared to the others and only serves as the funny side character. There's no explanation about who he is or why he behaves that way (Nintendo fans will correctly guess he's Captain Toad, but an outside viewer might not get it). This doesn't mean I didn't like him, his comedic timing was good and never annoying and he never tried to steal the scene for a gag. Luigi comes close to having little characterization, but it's mostly because he didn't have a lot of screen time. We do get to see his relationship with his family and Mario, we get his personality quite well and he gets to be a hero by helping Mario at the end.

End of negatives. Yes just that, lol. Now the positives!

The plot. Even if very simple, it just works. It's a movie about the beginning of the Mario Bros adventures, they couldn't tell a completely different story without twisting everything. Plus it's a movie made by Illumination and we know their main target audience are kids and so they mostly focus on simpler plots and not very deep stories (unlike Dreamworks or Pixar for example). And since it's a movie about a 40 year old chracter, the movie has to appeal to more aged viewers as well. Everyone knows Mario games aren't so deep with lore (not counting the various RPGs and spinoffs, I'm only talking about the mainline games!).

The atmosphere is perfect. "Normal looking" (but never plain) in Brooklyn and "super bizarre" in the Mushroom Kingdom. There are a lot of things taken from the games, but even if they are never explained they don't feel out of place because the universe is so odd and everything feels so unnatural they make sense for themselves, even for someone not used to Mario things. The floating blocks? By themselves they would look out of place, but with everything going on, the question isn't "Why is that block floating?", but "Why wouldn't that block float?". And this goes for every "strange" thing we see.

The characters are well distinguished even if in a simple way. Mario and Luigi are the ones with the deepest characterization with their wholesome relationship and family problems. Peach is simpler, but it's ok it's that way because we don't know anything about her past, just that she came from the same place as the Bros and the Toads took her as their Princess. Bowser is quite funny: he's presented as a ruthless tyrant, but in his speech to his troops we learn that he stole the power star and they're heading to the Mushroom Kingdom because he wants to marry Peach. Even his own army can't believe it! The viewers go "What??" the same way as they do! Donkey and Cranky Kong have a simple but effective relationship as well with Cranky being embarassed by his boisterous vain son who's supposed to be the prince, but instead he just likes to show off.

References. As much as I don't like too many refences to things in movies here they work! If they aren't relevant to the plot, like the powerup blocks and Rainbow Road, they act as very good background props and they are never constantly shoved in your face. A lot of them are even very well hidden, so the movie is worth a rewatch to catch all of them.

And now some things I enjoyed!

The mario Bros sitting at the table with their family. I love how they made them so different, yet so similar. Dad being voiced by Charles Martinet is poetic.

The Blue Spiny Shell scene in general. I knew it was gonna happen, but still surprised me.

The Donkey Kong vs Mario scene was one of my favourite scenes. Animation, pacing and dialogue was perfect there!

Bowser and Kamek piano duet. "Jam with me." *underground theme* *coin sound*. It was so unexpected, lol. Also Bowser's practice wedding with Kamek. Basically all scenes with both of them.

Mario's training course was also one of my favourite scenes. Peach stuffing the mushroom in his mouth was funny. Mario throwing up in between shots of the montage was even funnier. Mario and Peach little talk after it was sweet too.

Luigi in the Dark World. Everything about this scene. The Luigi's Mansion references, the Dry Bones behaving like stock movie zombies and the surprise Shy Guys at the end. Not gonna lie, I was expecting some Boos too in the Fortress.

Bowser's ehm... passionate singing lol.

Totally unexpected, I called the swearing. But not in the Mario Kart part where I expected it. And just in the Italian dub, I suppose as I really haven't seen it mentioned for any other languages. Mario and Luigi swear once each (or Luigi swears twice, I can't remember now) with a nice placed "Are you fucking with me?". Yes the Mario Bros officialy said "fuck". Twice.

Lumalee. Dark humor at its finest. The funny thing is that he could easily fit trough the cages' bars, but he just didn't want to, lol.

And finally a couple of missed opportunities (in my opinion).

The 1-up mushrom. Maybe they could have made Mario eat one someway and then let Bowser defeat him in the final battle. Everyone is grieving the poor plumber, Bowser is gloating in his victory, but Mario comes back to life thanks to the 1-up he ate before. Too much for Illumination?

I still haven't understood why they replaced Toadsworth with a generic Toad. He could have explained something on why Peach became the Princess.

After this review, I think I'm gonna change my previous 8/10 with a 9/10 (because this time I took in account the Nintendo fan in me, lol).

#the super mario bros movie #the super mario bros movie spoilers #mario movie #mario movie spoilers #random talks

[demcnsinmymind]

don't mind me being a cranky bitch today due to a variety of irl reasons but one thing kinda bugs the crap out of me. not really aimed at any one specific, but something I've noticed in general a lot lately

I seriously don't get this one pattern about it:

someone with a huge follower/mutual count follows me. I get excited thinking, woah! quality person is actually interested in tiny no name blog me, how cool! I can't wait to get something started!

weeks pass, person doesn't interact whatsoever. no like, no pm, no ask, nothing. I'm thinking okay, maybe they don't feel like it or are too shy, or maybe they expect me to interact first. so after a couple of weeks, I start sending some memes, I'm interacting with posts and liking them to show the moot that I appreciate seeing them on my dash and like reading their stuff and because I know how nice it is to have some form of interaction. I'm not just interacting with posts because I expect something in return. I just genuinely like interacting and showing my mutuals 'I see you and I've read what you're talking about and I love it!' but then we get back to this strange pattern I cannot figure tf out: person entirely ignores my interactions. reblogs memes, posts starter calls, I try to interact this way, since this is usually a signal in the rp world that says 'I'm open for new threads, send something my way :)' absolutely zero interaction or response to that too. And like???? It's not about the fact that there is no interaction in general. Like, I get it. People are busy. People don't owe you shit in return for your own engagements. I have a whole bunch of moots whom I followed first who haven't interacted in months because they're very busy, or take their time to reply and I know that and that's totally fine. But what I don't get is: why the fuck do these people even bother to follow first if they have absolutely zero intention to interact in any way, or are too busy or whatever else? Why follow even more people you know you couldn't be arsed to interact with currently? Why purposefully and entirely ignore every type of interaction without any little heads up or anything else? Like seriously, just fuck right off with that that, I'm so tired of bullshit like this. It's so discouraging and disrespectful imho. I'd rather have people soft or hardblock me if they decide they're no longer or not interested in interacting or if the follow was a mistake or something. Hey, absolutely no hard feelings. People come and go! I softblock every now and then too when I don't vibe. But the following and then ghosting and ignoring is just such bullshit.

#I'm done playing this character : ooc #out of batteries #negativity tw #I'm being bitchy today =(

[partywithgyu]

𝓢𝓬𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓶𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓒𝓸𝓵𝓸𝓻𝓼

//𝓒𝓱𝓸𝓲 𝓢𝓸𝓸𝓫𝓲𝓷//

♡♡♡♡♡

Pairing: Soobin x Reader.

Tag: Café!au.

W/C: 1810.

Chapter summary: Soobin starts working at Screaming Colors.

Chapter 1.

♡♡♡♡♡

1

Sage green were the tiles on the wall. you faced as you arranged the many things placed on the counter. Packets of sugar you placed in a cup. The cup was to be placed on the collection counter. There were a series of tasks you'd have to do every morning to prepare for the day ahead of you. You enjoyed doing them. At least, now you did. For life seemed to be more monotonous, you found tiny packets of joy in tasks as simple as arranging packets of sugars. 

 The sound of the door swinging open made you look up. Finally, your co-workers Huening Kai and Beomgyu had arrived. It was something you'd anticipate. Working in a busy café all by yourself would be difficult. The place was understaffed because it had opened recently. You even brought the issue up to the owner once. The old lady told you, with the sweetest smile, that she would hire another person soon. All you could do was try to not get distracted by her colorful, fancy earrings as she spoke. Seeing her smile, you smiled, hoping she'd stick to her word. Well, she didn't hire anyone very soon. 

She stuck to her words, though. Today was the day the new guy was going to start working. "Good morning," said the two boys in unison as they walked toward you. "Morning," you greeted them. Your eyes then landed on the boy who had walked in behind them. The tall boy gave you a small, polite smile. "Good morning," he said awkwardly, making Huening Kai laugh. Laughing when nothing funny had happened was a very common thing for Huening Kai to do. You were used to it. "He's Soobin, the new guy," informed Beomgyu. "Oh. Nice to meet you." "You too." 

 On your first day of work, you were unsure of if you would be decent at the job even. Well, you were pretty good. The best thing about being a barista was the power you held. You had the power to set the tone of someone's day. People walking in, yet to consume their daily dose of caffeine, interacted with you every morning. You tried to make the interactions as positive as possible, even though some of them seemed rather cranky with clouded minds. 

 Your interactions with the customers were amazing. At least, that's what Soobin thought. Taking orders was your job. Preparing the drinks and meals, were the jobs assigned to Beomgyu and Huening Kai. Though Beomgyu had taken over the duty to explain to him how the café would be run, you had managed to gain his interest. You truly enjoyed the job, he could conclude. The morning he had spent placing muffins and pastries on the plates, when they were demanded and then washing the rather colorful plates and cups. 

 "I hope you had a good first day," you said to Soobin. There was a smile on your face as you adjusted the bag over your shoulder. The shift did come to an end after all. It was evening when the four of you found yourselves walking down the same lane as you always did. "Yes. Thank you," he said to you, making you chuckle. You found the formality cute. His nervousness showed through his awkward mannerism.  "Don't thank her. I taught you everything," said Beomgyu, confident as ever. He really did take pride in his mentoring. Soobin shyly turned to him. "Thank you," he said to Beomgyu. It was a rather funny sight to watch someone actually take Beomgyu seriously. Huening Kai and you shared a look before laughing. "Wow. He's so nice," you praised. "You were like this when you joined too. Look at you now," said Huening Kai, earning a light slap on his arm. "I am nice." 

 The not so meaningful conversation came to an end when the lane did. Waving at the other three guys, you turned to the left. Everytime you'd part ways with them here. This was when you felt more lonely because someone once waited for you, right at the turn, on weekends. The boy named Yeonjun, was your lover. Outside the café, you were lonely because most of your time you would spend with him. Living in apartments just a series of steps away, made it easy for you to do so. When you two were kids, you would build sand castles with him. That was your earliest memory of being his friend. The latest memory was the one of him ending the relationship for he had to move to the states. You two were distant, soon the memories would be. He hadn't even cared to call you once or twice. Not even his new number you knew. The birthday wish you had sent to them on instagram, was never read. As if, he had realized that he was happier without the relationship. 

Still you tried to convince yourself otherwise. You held onto meaningless hope, you wished you could let go of. You couldn't. Such things weren't as easy to you as you wished they were. 

On Sunday, Soobin was the second one to arrive. He had walked in to see you lost in your thoughts as you stared at the green tiles. The golden sunlight highlighted the tip of your nose. Your lips were curved into a frown. It was a sight beautiful but sad. You were more cheerful the day before. He cleared his throat to earn a cheerful greeting. You smiled when you saw him standing there. "Good morning," you said to him. "Good morning," he said shyly before heading to the back room. 

Few minutes later, you watched Beomgyu and Huening Kai running into the store. Startled, you could only question the reason. "Why are you guys running?," you asked. The two boys were panting. Beomgyu even sat down on the floor. This only made you wonder if you should lock the door or something. "Will you guys answer?" Huening Kai decided to destroy your curiosity. "We saw Miss Park's car on our way here. Didn't want her to know that we were late," he let you know. The two of them then rushed into the back room. Soobin who walked out as they went in, gave them a look of curiosity. "The owner is on her way," you let him know. "The two of them don't want her to know that they're late again so the rush," you explained. The tall boy came and stood beside you. "They're late often?," he asked casually.    

 "Yeah. The two of them plan on coming here together. Beomgyu oversleeps. Huening Kai is an angel who waits for him without complaining. That's how they get late," you went on. Soobin's lips formed  a small 'oh.' His face to you seemed rather beautiful. The comforting kind of beautiful. It was his nose that caught your attention. It was so cute. You wished you could tell it out loud or maybe poke his cheeks. You couldn't. That wouldn't be a normal thing to do. So, you didn't do it. You looked outside, through the glass door to see the owner of the café named Screaming Colors, getting out from the red SUV. 

Bright colors really were her thing. At least it suited her bright personality. Even this early in the morning she could get herself to walk into the café with a smile on her face. 

 "Good morning, Miss Park," you greeted the lady. 

  "Good morning, Y/N," she said to you with a warm smile. Miss Park was a stylish woman. Anyone you knew her, knew that. On this day she wore an orange coat over black trousers. To compliment the coat, she wore huge, sunflower earrings. The yellow color was indeed eye catching. "How are you?," she asked. Dragging your attention away from the yellow earrings you looked at her. "I am fine. How have you been, ma'am?," you asked her. "I've been good. I thought of coming in and checking if everything is going well," she said as looked around the café. 

"So, this is the new guy?," she asked. "Yes." "Nice to meet you. I am Choi Soobin." The tall boy bowed slightly while introducing himself. "Nice to meet you, Soobin. I hope you work diligently," she said. She always smiled as she spoke. Some giggles too were heard as she spoke. This woman always sounded so happy, you felt rather dull compared to her. "Where are the other two guys?"

  "We were cleaning the staff room," lied Beomgyu as he walked outside the room. The taller boy, who definitely didn't seem like a good liar, followed the older. "Ah. Good. Good." Them being praised by the older woman for work that you did wasn't the best thing in the world. It just made you stare at Beomgyu with a blank expression. He just gave you a small, mischievous smile. These were the things you had to deal with quite often now. 

 "I know we don't have a lot of staff. It's a new café. There are no dorms around. It's difficult," she said to the four of you. Her apologetic tone made you  feel the need to tell her to not worry. But then again, the manager wouldn't even arrive before noon. Also, Beomgyu really couldn't even get up on time. On a few days, he had definitely arrived much later than he had today. You noticed that his apron wasn't even tied properly. He wanted to make you facepalm so hard. You could not do that. So all you did was give him a small glare. 

 Soobin looked over at you, secretly wishing for this boring conversation to end soon. It was rather awkward to him. Especially since it was just his second day of work. But then again, he didn't have a lot of plans for the day. His best friend who seemed to have been making their friendship complicated had moved to the states. No explanations for the impulsive kisses were left behind for him. He was left to remain curious. Wondering if he was just one of the many people Yeonjun had made such impulsive decisions with. He wished he would have been more than that. Somehow, no one in college felt like they were more than that. They were all left to wonder if there was a reason he didn't date anyone. He was a player they assumed. To Soobin, he didn't seem like one. He was so caring and genuine. Someone Soobin could connect with. He had to be more than just a player.

He would forget about him sooner or later, he assured himself. His classmates had stopped talking about him. His name was not mentioned as much in conversations anymore.

"Well, what about your friend who was interested?," the old woman asked you.

 "Yeonjun? He moved to the states." 

♡♡♡♡♡

To head to my masterlist click here.

#txt #beomgyu #soobin #txt imagines #txt fluff #yeonjun #txt x reader #txt angst #txt scenarios #hueningkai #txtimagine #choi beomgyu #choi soobin #kang taehyun #choi yeonjun #choi soobin imagines #soobin imagines #soobin au #txt au #soobin x reader #txt x y/n #kpop imagines #kpop scenarios #kpop #kpopidol #tomorrow by together #tomorrow x together

[evo-lou-tion]

24 Jan 22 - Understanding Sadness and Regret

I couldn't sleep properly for days, and it's bugging me. I wake up feeling cranky, and unable to give my focus to what I want to do during the day. I was very frustrated. I mean, I did all I can to heal, trying to take care of myself, and then, there's niggling sadness and I keep waking up at night.

So I asked my coach on what else should I ask myself, because I have been asking myself alot of questions, and, I'm tired mentally and physically and this sleep issue isn't helping. Through the conversation, sadness and regret emerged from their shadows. What sadness and regret are telling me, are that, I regret making a decision to be together even though I wasn't sure of it. There was this, miscomm that she had that she thought "let's see how it goes" meant, let's get together and we see how it goes." I didn't correct her as she sprung upon me with a white flower, which was so sweet. How nervous she must have been, having never done this before. Anyway, I was unsure and had this niggling feeling in my heart that the kids part is important to me.

I regret not listening to my heart and following it. Maybe, we would be happier now, maybe, she would have found someone who accepts her specifically the way she is right now, not being able to face the challenges of healing and just travel the world finding happiness.

Me, maybe I'd be happier? Maybe I won't be struggling to heal from this breakup? I'd probably be doing something else other than healing from this breakup?

I am sorry, Louisa. At that time, I was dealing with rejection and she was there. I was dealing with the emotions of loneliness and wanting to be with someone to share my thoughts and feelings with. And she was, there. I wasn't particularly happy with the outings with her, but I chose to see the happy parts and ignored the things that bothered me.

We could be happier now. Feeling this immense regret and sadness. It's okay, Louisa. It's a lesson learnt. Now, be aware of how you feel about people and how their energies interact with you. Don't rush into things. And forgive myself for not knowing better.

I suppose this is the self-love action for the day, getting back into the swing of things to start off the week as serenely as possible, and sleep matters. Well, alot.

Today's Self-Love Action: How can I create a serene energy in me today? I might put on some good tunes, or remind myself something I'm happy about, or stop to have a chat with a loved one or co-worker today. For me, it's working out my emotions for me to have a better sleep.