#'everyone says this fic fucks them up but I bet I'll be fine lol'

[maplefiasco]

Hi it's 2021 and I just read Not Easily Conquered for the first time and it made me so crazy I had to make graphics about it until I calmed down.

#stucky #mcu #not easily conquered #nec #the thirteen letters #a long winter #stevebucky #stuckyedit #steve rogers #bucky barnes #captain america #marveledit #my edit #fic recs #it'd been sitting in a tab for like a month while I put it off #and I fiiiinally sat down to read it on saturday like #'everyone says this fic fucks them up but I bet I'll be fine lol' #fast forward to sunday afternoon and... I was not fine #and apparently epistolary elements make me photoshop-feral

[bumblesimagines]

The Oldest Pogue

Request: Yes or No

Heads up for most of these Outer Banks fic I'll probably do the mini intro lol they're fun. Btw timelines a lil weird. Takes place in ep 1 but have the party the day after they find the boat and all that. Idk Shoupe's first name so imma just call him Shoupe or dad. Idk what grade everyone is in but imma assume that the Pogues and Sarah (+ Topper) are sophomores/juniors since they're 16

~

"Then there's (Y/N) Shoupe, better known as Mama Pogue or (N/N). We got lucky with (Y/N) since he's the deputy's son. He's the definition of a mom friend, always taking care of us. We'd probably starve to death without his meals. Though we would never admit it, we all had crushes on him when we first met him."

(Y/N) entered the house, glancing at a passed out JJ. He chuckled, shaking his head as John B stepped out of his room.

"Morning, sweetie." (Y/N) greeted playfully, setting down groceries.

"Sorry I couldn't join you guys yesterday." (Y/N) started putting the things away and began making some lunch for the boys. John B shrugged.

"It's fine, you'll make it up to us with food." John B replied with a grin. (Y/N) chuckled, nodding.

"Where'd you go?" (Y/N) asked. John B sat at the table, glancing at JJ.

"Motel.. Found a sunken boat and a key in it so we went to the motel. Had to dodge your dad. He took money from a potential crime scene." John B told him. (Y/N) sighed.

"What do you want me to do? He already says half of our conversations are 'political'. He doesn't like that I'm hanging out with a bunch of idiots." (Y/N) said as Kiara and Pope entered.

"Ouch." Kiara grinned, glancing at JJ as he stirred. "Did you tell him about the gun and money?"

"Gun?"

"I was getting to that, Kie." John B sighed. "JJ took the gun."

"Jesus.. A gun? Underaged with an unregistered gun and no license?" (Y/N) stared at them. "Do you know how much trouble you'll get into?!"

"I tried to tell them, (N/N)." Pope said. (Y/N) pinched the bridge of his nose, putting the two plates of burgers before approaching the half asleep male.

"JJ, a gun? Really? Of all things?" (Y/N) stared at him. "Huh?" JJ looked at him, drool coming out the side of his mouth. A swift smack to the back of his head woke him up.

"Jesus, what the fuck?" JJ huffed, sitting up and rubbing the back of his head. "Come eat breakfast, JJ." John B called.

"What the hell am I gonna do with you four?" (Y/N) asked, sighing softly. JJ stood, chuckling.

"Love us." He replied, going to the table and sitting down.

"Please don't play with a gun." (Y/N) looked at him. JJ nodded, raising his hands. "Promise, Mama Pogue."

"Swear on Cheesecake?" (Y/N) cocked a brow.

"Cheesecake?" Kiara furrowed her brows.

"I swear.. I swear on Cheesecake that I won't play with the gun." JJ gave a nod. (Y/N) nodded, crossing his arms.

"Who's Cheescake?" Pope asked. "A fish we caught." JJ replied, mouth full.

"Gross." Kiara cringed, giggling.

"Eat with your mouth closed." (Y/N) called. JJ swallowed and nodded.

"Yes, mom." JJ replied, grinning. (Y/N) shook his head, running his hand through his hair.

"How's everyone after Agatha?" Pope asked.

"I mean.. People have been calling the department left and right. The power will probably be out for a while." (Y/N) shrugged.

"Bet those kooks will have power in no time." JJ mumbled, shaking his head.

"Can't believe the one day I don't hang out with you guys, JJ gets a fucking gun." (Y/N) sighed, shaking his head.

"Also! John B and Pope surfed the surge." Kiara said.

"You did what?!"

"Way to snitch on us, Kie." Pope mumbled. Kiara shrugged.

"It's called payback." Kiara replied with a chuckle.

"If it took down a boat, it probably could've taken you along with it." (Y/N) placed his hands on his hips. JJ mimicked him, earning another smack on the head.

"Come on, we're having a party at the boneyard." John B said.

(Y/N) laughed as he won the drinking competition. JJ laughed, high fiving him. Kiara noticed the JJ held onto (Y/N)'s hand for a little longer than needed.

"What would daddy say if he saw you drinking?" JJ asked, getting another cup. The two headed over to John B. (Y/N) laughed.

"What's he gonna do? Ground me? Lock me up for drinking?" (Y/N) questioned. JJ shrugged, grinning as he offered John B a cup but noticed Sarah Cameron and offered it to her instead.

"Sarah, can I interest you in a tasty Milawaukee beverage?" JJ asked. (Y/N) shot him a look, glancing at Topper.

"No, thanks." Sarah smiled, shaking her head.

"Come on. Is it not fancy enough for you?" JJ asked.

"No, we were just leaving-"

"You know what? I'll take it." Topper cut in. (Y/N) and John B shared a look.

"Let it go, JJ-"

"No, no, I'll have it." Topper cut (Y/N) off.

"That's nice, Topper but I didn't ask you. Now, if you said pretty please, maybe, but you didn't. So, Sarah-" Topper knocked the drink out of JJ's hands which in turn made JJ grab him by the shirt.

"JJ!" (Y/N) grabbed him as John B and Pope came in, pushing him away as well.

"Dirty Pogues!" Topper shouted. (Y/N) looked at John B.

"John B, don't you dare-" John B turned around, shoving Topper back. Sarah tried to cut in but Topper punched John B. The fight caught the attention of everyone else. Topper kicked John B while he was on the ground.

"Hey, John B, don't make me down you like your old man, alright?" Topper said.

"This dumb fucking blonde." (Y/N) whispered, pinching the bridge of his nose. A fight quickly broke out, the two fighting in the waves and sand as the crowd chanted. (Y/N) watched them, trying to get them to stop.

"Topper, stop!" Sarah shouted, trying to stop her boyfriend from drowning John B. (Y/N) quickly stepped in, grabbing him by the back of his shirt and pulling him back, punching him. John B coughed behind him, head spinning.

"You wanna go, Shoupe?" Topper asked. (Y/N) went to respond but a gun was pressed to the side of Topper's head, the safety clicking.

"JJ-"

"Your move, broski." JJ stared at Topper. Most of the teens on the beach ran while Sarah and the other Pogues tried to get JJ to put the gun away.

"We're good! We're good!" Topper repeated.

"(N/N), Kie, check your psycho friend!" Sarah watched, panicked and worried for her boyfriends life.

"Okay, everyone, listen up! Get the hell off our side of the island!" JJ shouted, shooting two rounds into the air. Pope and Kiara shouted at JJ while (Y/N) quickly rushed to John B's side as he collapsed.

"My dad's gonna kill me." (Y/N) whispered, dragging John B out of the water.

"Help me!" (Y/N) called, getting the others attention. JJ and Pope rushed over, helping (Y/N) carry John B to the van.

"Is he okay?" Kiara asked as she drove.

"Yeah, he's breathing." (Y/N) replied, staring down at the male. John B coughed but didn't open his eyes.

"He might have a killer headache tomorrow but other than that, he should be fine." (Y/N) said.

"I can't believe you were so stupid! Taking the gun out on a kook?!" Pope stared at JJ. The two got into an argument, Kiara jumping in as well.

"Enough! JJ did it to help stop Topper from hurting me and John B. Yes, he could've done it another way and handled it better but at the end of the day, he was trying to help." (Y/N) looked at them.

"You always take his side." Pope mumbled.

"It's cause he loves me." JJ grinned.

"You're my least favourite child." (Y/N) mumbled. JJ chuckled. "Admit it. I'm your favourite." JJ cooed. (Y/N) flipped him off. They got to John B's place, getting him in bed. (Y/N) got on his dirt bike and rode off, heading home.

"Can't wait to hear this lecture." (Y/N) mumbled, parking his bike and heading inside. He entered the kitchen, starting up dinner. (Y/N) made his dad's favourite, hoping it would please him. (Y/N) heard the door open and clothes, his dad entering in uniform.

"Hey, dad." (Y/N) greeted, placing the plates of food down. He sat, shooting his dad a smile.

"Got a call not long ago. Some kid had a gun." Shoupe said, sitting down. (Y/N) hummed.

"Did you find out who it was?" (Y/N) asked. Shoupe shook his head.

"No.. But from eyewitnesses, there was a fight and I heard you were involved." Shoupe said.

"Dad, you know I'm not the violent type." (Y/N) continued to eat. "But I did punch Topper for trying to drown John B." (Y/N) said quickly.

"Thank you for being honest." Shoupe said, sighing deeply. He put his fork down and looked at his son.

"(Y/N).. I don't want these kids to ruin the possibility of you going to culinary school." Shoupe said. (Y/N) sighed, looking away. "And they will if you keep running with them."

"Dad, I'm gonna be a senior next year. I have my whole life ahead. I could enter culinary school whenever I want or feel like it." (Y/N) said. Shoupe sighed and nodded.

"I know.. I just don't want you getting stuck here. I want you to have an early start." Shoupe said. "I'll be accepting of you.. No matter what." Shoupe assured.

"Thanks, dad. Anything new today?" (Y/N) asked. He thought back onto what John B told him.

"Nope." Shoupe shook his head. (Y/N) hummed, nodding. He stood, washing the plates and heading off to bed. He hoped the following days would be better.

#x reader #x you #x y/n #x male reader #x male!reader #outerbanks #outer banks #outer banks x reader #outer banks x male!reader #outer banks x you #outer banks x y/n #john b x reader #john b x male reader #Pope Heyward x reader #Pope Heyward x male reader #Kiara Carrera x reader #Kiara Carrera x male reader #JJ Maybank x reader #JJ Maybank x male reader

[dayseternal-blog]

Hi Days! I'm a huge fan of your work and your tumblr blog bc you give so many naruhina fanfic recs and talk about your stories, etc.

To sum it up, you're my favorite person lol, I'm a bit shy so I'm asking this as an anon, but I wanted to tell you something random just because I've always just thought about it and maybe you would agree or comment on it.

Have you ever listened to mitski? If you haven't I recomend you do bc she's amazing, but anyways I was listening to a song of hers called "washing machine heart" and it reminded me of naruhina, like the fic "together you and I" but different you know, like naruto only married hinata because he couldn't have sakura, she was his second option and every time he looked at her he wished and pretended it was Sakura, so Hina tries her hardest to look pretty and try to be the person he wants, always getting saddend by the idea that she isn't the one he wants, she knows his heart will only belong to Sakura. She let's him trample all over her heart and use her because she loves him unconditionally, maybe cry to her on some nights because he longs for Sakura's love that will never come.

I've read so many fanfics and I've never encountered one using this concept, I'd write it myself, but I'm not good at writing, maybe I'm reaching but it could inspire an angst story made by you or just a prompt or idea/concept for anyone to use. The hurt in this could be inmaculate and I bet a good writer could bring everyone to tears if they read a story like this. You don't have to do anything ofc I'll love you either way, I'm not meaning to push you to write a whole story with this concept by any means or to even post this ask, it's just something I made up/ related to this certain song, so I wanted you to see it, perhaps share your opinion or thoughts on it or just think about it. I love pain a lot hahaha bc I'm not a narusaku shipper in any way, I actually dislike the ship a lot.

Thank you for reading this and pls keep up the awesome work!! I'll always be a fan and support you and your spectacular writing❤️❤️

GAH What an awful fic idea you have 💔

“The Ring that Binds” by softwind - Rated M, Canon-Divergent, Multi-chapter, Incomplete.  Naruto and Hinata are married.  So why is Naruto calling “Sakura” in his sleep?

“Girl No 10″ by meeiwen - Rated M, Modern AU, Multi-chapter, Complete. Naruto makes a mistake with a dancer one drunk night.  Years later when he meets her again, he begins realizing his perfect life is a lie, but he’s too late to fix it.

And

“Territorial” by @bunny-hoodlum - Rated M, High school AU, Multi-chapter, Complete.  When Hinata takes advantage of Naruto’s desperation for love, they’re both a little too much for the other to handle.

Are similar to what you have there.

HERE’S MY VERY QUICK AND INCOMPLETE STAB AT YOUR PROMPT IT’S UNEDITED UNREVISED CANON-DIVERGENT AU RATED T FOR LANGUAGE BUT I HOPE YOU LIKE WHAT I COULD COME UP WITH 😘  THEY ARE NOT MARRIED BECAUSE I WOULD BE TOO SAD

...

Naruto finally makes it to the Hokage’s office, having had trouble shaking off fangirls on his way.  He can immediately tell he’s the last one there, even though it’s the eve of the Rinnegan Festival.  Tense expressions greet him, the atmosphere somber.

Sakura whips her attention back to the desk before them.  “Rokudaime, with all due respect, I don’t think Naruto belongs on this mission.”

Her behavior has confused him all night.  First moving away from him so that Hinata would sit between them at Ichiraku when Hinata could have just sat on the other side of him.  Then pushing him to follow Hinata back home.  He said aloud that he’d be seeing her later, and that he wanted to catch up with everyone first, but Sakura just glared at him...

She’s been pushing him away, more and more every day, breaking his heart to smaller and smaller pieces...whether knowingly or not, he’s not sure about that, but she’s never rejected him from being her teammate on a mission.

Worried, he meets Kakashi’s gaze.

“I understand your concern, Sakura.”  His tone is heavy.  His usual careless attitude nowhere in sight.  “Call it just my gut-feeling...you’re going to need Naruto’s strength for this mission.”

-

Hanabi was kidnapped.

Hiashi and Hinata are nowhere to be found.

“What do you mean...?” Naruto finds himself asking.  “I just saw her.  We just saw her.  Not even an hour ago.”

“When Sai reported Hanabi’s kidnapping, believe me, Naruto, we moved to notify her family immediately.  Anbu can’t find them.”

“What?”  The last memory he has of Hinata abruptly leaving dinner and running off without hardly a word nags at him, inexplicably tightening his chest.  “She’s fine.  Hinata’s strong.  She can take on anybody.  No one would dare-”

“Naruto,” Sakura interrupts, her gaze cutting sharp.  “She’s nowhere to be found.  And as much as you believe that, no one is invincible.  Not even Hinata.  We need to form a plan, otherwise we’re losing precious time.”

“No one is invincible.  Not even Hinata.”

An emptying numbness invades his insides, discomforting slickness muting him.

This isn’t his fault, is it?

-

What if she needed to tell him something?

She was acting strange at Ichiraku.

Quiet, unusual for her as of recent...

But how was he supposed to notice?  Should he have followed after her, like Sakura said?  But they were supposed to meet at his apartment later on anyway, so why did she have to come out early like that and ruin the good time he was having?  She knows how he hasn’t given up on Sakura.

She knows everything about him.  She’s been his rock after Sakura tried to shut him down for good.  So how can it be that she’d just disappear?  There’s no way.

There’s just no way that she disappeared right after she left...

-

Hours.

Hours of wandering around in abandoned, desolate, war-stricken villages in god-knows-where, and nothing.  No one.

He’s asking for the hundredth time, but he doesn’t care, he’s past the point of desperation, and anxiety-laced tension fills the air.  “Taku, you really don’t see anything?!”  The Hyuuga they have on their team led them into this godforsaken wasteland.

Taku turns on him aggressively, getting in his face in reaction, and yells, “What about you??  You think I’m not trying my best?!  This is my family!  Just because you’re Hinata’s boyfriend doesn’t mean you’re any more worried than the rest of us!  You don’t sense her??”

No.  He doesn’t.

His Sage Mode has never been so useless.  In fact, he senses no one besides them in this place, and it’s with terrible unease that he begins to entertain the thought that she’s gone for good.

“There’s no one even here besides us!  Nothing!  Why’d you take us down here?  Where are we even?!  How do we get out of here in the first place?!” he argues back.

“Sakura-san was right!  You don’t belong on this mission!  I don’t know what Hinata-sama could ever see in you, I haven’t seen her smile in months!”

“What do you mean by that?!  She smiles all the time!  I’ve never seen her act so cheerful in my life!”

“So you fucking know it, too!”  Taku glares at him with an incredulous expression.  “That she’s just acting!”

“What the hell do you mean by that-”

And he doesn’t know what happened next, but Sai’s grabbing onto Taku and he himself is locked in Shikamaru’s shadow manipulation.  Chakra’s sparking off his own hands, while blue embers warp along Taku’s.

“Calm down,” Shikamaru orders both of them.  “We’re not getting anywhere if the two of you keep fighting.”  He waits for Taku to loosen his stance.

Sai lets go of him.

Taku throws an insulting glare around before sauntering off.

Shikamaru sighs.  Hard.  “Go cool your head, Naruto.”  He retracts his shadow, and Naruto wastes no time walking off in the opposite direction, far from wherever Taku is heading.

Yet Taku’s ridiculous words ring in his head.  “That she’s just acting.”

But she said that she’s happy to be with him.  That she doesn’t mind that he’s still in love with Sakura.  She said that she’s just happy to be with him.

She said that.  She did.  And she wouldn’t lie to him, right?

She was just acting?

“You’re not going to finish your ramen?” he asked her on their date last month.

“No...”  Suddenly, she smiled brightly, something she’s been doing more often ever since he mentioned that he’s always liked how genki Sakura is.  “Do you want the rest of mine?  I’m dieting.”

He scrunched his eyebrows at her.  “Dieting?  Why?”

“Well...”  She looked thoughtful for a moment before seeming to come to a decision.  “Naruto-kun, you like thin girls, right?”

He knew she was talking about Sakura.  “...I guess...”

“I want to make you happy,...” she started.  She bit her lips for a hesitating moment before continuing, “so I’ve been trying to lose a little weight.”

“Oh.”  He didn’t know what to make of that.  Unbidden, he looked her over. 

“Can you tell?” she asked, her characteristic shyness lowered her lashes, yet she didn’t fidget under his examination, and he could tell how she was trying her best to have that confident persona he admires in his former teammate.

Despite her recent changes in attitude, Hinata’s still been so physically small compared to himself and everyone else.  Under her jacket, he couldn’t tell if she looked skinnier or not, and even if she was, he doesn’t think she really needed to be skinnier.

But then she looked up at him with that heavy, hopeful weight in her gaze, and he couldn’t let her down.  Not when she’s trying so hard for his approval.

He fibbed easily.  “Yeah.  You look really good.”

She shined another smile at him that made him feel good.  Even if their relationship wasn’t traditional, he could at least still make her happy.  He could at least tell her some sweet words and see her sweet smile and-

She was lying.

She wasn’t happy?

He never made her happy?

Then what was the point of any of it?

No, she must have been happy, right?!  She said so!  She told him so!  Many, many times!

After all, he asked her.  All of those times he thought she was faking her smile, he asked just to make sure, and she vehemently told him that she was really happy to be with him.

She said he could talk to her about all of it.  That she could take on his heartbreak because her feelings were so much bigger than...

“Uzumaki Naruto.”

The unfamiliar voice has him leaping to his feet.

A man as pale as a ghost with piercingly icy eyes is floating down to him on some strange platform.  “You’re really as pitiful as I expected.”

“Who the hell are you?!”  He readies his stance.  He’s not in any mood for games, and he’s ready to let loose some of his stress on this very suspicious character.

“Hinata’s fiance.”

“Hinata?!”  Fire races through his veins, heating his feet, and he’s ready to leap at this guy.  “Where is she?!”

“With me.”

His heart rate exponentially explodes, beating into his ears, his skin practically bristling.  “Let her go,” he demands, and the threat of his words leaks from every pore of his being.  “Now.”

The man almost snorts.  “What makes you think she wants to see you?  You only ever used her, broke her...”  His collected expression hardens, and Naruto can sense that he has no intention of releasing her.  “I’ll make her happier than you ever could.”

Several thoughts fly too quickly through his mind to properly process any of it, leaving only residual uncertainty and that deepening sense of his culpability in her sudden disappearance.  But he doesn’t linger on the unpleasant sensations.  “What the fuck do you know?!”  And he’s charging at him, a Rasengan heavy in his hand.

The enemy is far more powerful than he appeared, immediately blowing him back with some kind of focused chakra.  “Weak, pathetic.”

“GIVE HER BACK!”  He replicates himself a dozen times, each of them throwing Rasenshurikens at the man.

Yet more of that strange yellow chakra protects him.  He’s unscathed even under his shadow clone onslaught.  “No.  I gave her a choice, and she came with me.  I’m just here to get rid of you, take revenge against you for her sake.”

He hardly comprehends the nonsense spewing out of the enemy’s mouth, and he rallies his clones into close combat, but the man manages to avoid many of the attacks while landing hits of his own.

Clones poofing away only to be replaced by more, frustration and fury starting to blind him into sloppier and sloppier moves.

“I love Hinata.  That’s why I deserve her.”

He chokes on his own breath, and in his momentary loss of concentration,...

He’s falling.

------------------------*

aaannnnd that’s as far as I want to go with that.  Imagine the rest of the team arriving in time to notice Toneri making his escape toward the sky, and I guess the rest of the story would sort of follow the rest of The Last...Naruto self-reflects a lot in a bundle of depression for a long time and yeah.

...ahhh...  I encourage you to write the fic you want to see in the world ❤️

#anon #thank you for thinking i could do your fic idea justice #but in the end 😅 i'm sorry that this is a letdown #i'm not much one for angst you know #who wrote white lilies not me #thank you for laying the praise on thick 🥺 don't know if i'm deserving #thank you for reading!

[rogue-barnes-16]

RUSSIAN ROULETTE (Destroyer fic)

Request: just watched Destroyr too nd I'm thirsty for a fic nd saw you're taking requests from it. Can you do a fic where chris goes undercover with the reader instead with erin and when the Russian Roulette shit happens the reader does something to stop it nd chris confronts her later or smthng || idk it's a messy request sorry. || Pls make it anon??? || lol srry XOXO

Pairing: Chris x reader (Destroyer)

Genre: angsty (?) idk how to describe it

Tags:

Permanent taglist: @notexactlythatgirl @thisismysecrethappyplace @sofreakinmanyfandoms @pizzarollpatrol @bubblycypress87 @sinviix @loislp @lovenaturefirst @dyanna-corona @2ptonpt @goodnightmode @disneyprincessbuffyannesummers @mannls @cutie1365 @catch22inareddress @mybooradley @sebastianisasnack @butifulsoul125

Warnings: not actual spoilers (that's a warning), tension, makeout, language

A/N: first of, I feel like I should make this clear again THIS DOES NOT CONTAIN SPOILERS BUT IT IS BASED ON A PART OF A SCENE OF THE MOVIE. Also, DAMN I enjoyed writing this. Also, it soothed the pain caused by the movie (thanks Nicole Kidman, you lovely human being, for destroying my heart). Anyway, enjoy <3.

Rogue-barnes-16 masterlist

I lay down on the sofa, giving Chris a brief glance to check on him. A while ago, I could have just asked him since all the party noise would have covered our voices, but it all had gotten really quiet.

People had slowly left, and in the house there were just a few people left. Silas, sitting on the armchair; Petra and that other girl, checking their messed up makeup in the mirror; Toby, playing some random video game; Chris, sat right behind Toby, and Arturo, who was coming my way in the moment.

"look what I found" he shook the pack of beers on his right hand, a mischievous grin on his face.

"reinforcements" I extended my hand for him to give me one. "nice, I needed it" I opened the one he gave me and took a sip.

When Arturo made a hesitant attempt to sit besides me, I moved my leg for him to have more room. "looking gorgeous today, Y/n" he said, half cuddling me.

Arturo was kind of pinning over me, I knew it. I sometimes, if I was in a playful mood, would lead him on. He knew I 'was with Chris' —even though we weren't actually together—, so there was nothing else apart from teasing and light flirting.

Chris, however, to pretend, most of the times would play the jealous boyfriend card, but right now he was distracted.

There was someone who was noticing it, though. Silas had his eyes on us, and, if I only had noticed it before, I would have stopped.

But I hadn't.

I jumped at the loud thud that sounded right besides me. When I turned to it, I saw a small gun on the floor.

"Arturo" Silas called the boy besides him. He tilted his head to the gun with a sick smile on his face. "let's see if your time has come?"

The room, now silent, was filled with anxiety and tension.

I tried playing it cool, but the fear in my eyes gave me away. I knew I was being too obvious when Chris decided to intervene.

"fuck it, Arturo" he said carelessly, not looking at anyone, but at the joint he had just rolled. "don't do it" he added, lighting up the joint before giving it a puff.

"it's none of your business Chris" Chris replied at Silas' statement with a gesture of indifference while he let out the smoke. "C'mon Arturo, grow a pair. Don't wanna play?"

I knew things were about to get worse than expected when Arturo got up and grabbed the gun from the floor.

"there he goes" Silas commented, letting out a dark chuckle. "c'mon, come here and look at me in the eye."

I stole a glance at Chris, who was subtly staring at me with almost unnoticeable nervousness in his eyes.

"Wait" all of them turned to me. "he doesn't wanna do it." before Silas could protest, I gave him a knowing smirk "doesn't have what it takes"

"sweetheart, it's done" Silas made himself more comfortable before looking at Arturo again. "someone gotta play now, so go ahead"

I wasn't going to allow that to happen.

"I wanna play." I stated, standing up. "and I definitely got what it takes" I made my way to then, noticing how Chris' breath hitched, making him swallow the smoke and causing him to cough. "c'mon give me the gun"

Arturo gave me the gun, not before looking at Silas for approval. "Okay sweetheart" the man sitting before me let out a chuckle. "same rules. Gun against your head and eyes on me"

"Silas, c'mon" Petra, who had stayed silent until then, spoke with a trembling voice. "don't- babe, let's drop it."

"Nope, babydoll" the man replied. "c'mon Y/n, make the roulette spin, will you?" it took me a second, but I managed to made the cylinder spin without looking at it. "atta girl."

"baby, quit it" I heard Chris voice, but I didn't really listen to it. "leave it, c'mon" I took a deep, shaky breath, and, when I felt my eyes watering, I pulled the trigger. "Y/n!"

Nothing happened.

I exhaled, tossing the gun to the floor and shutting my eyes. "Y/n, sweetheart, you're nuts." Silas started to laugh, giving me a surprised look. "it was loaded. You can't let people tell you what to do like that" everyone started to chuckle lightly too.

"it has three bullets inside" I turned to Chris, who was holding the gun with the cylinder open. "holy fuck" he managed to feign a laugh and I exited the room, feeling my whole body shaking.

"Chris, go get your crazy girl" Silas said, not able to stop laughing. "go and fuck, she'll calm down!"

I heard heavy steps behind me before a large hand grabbed my forearm, dragging me into a dark room. "what were you thinking" Chris hissed, shutting the door. "what the fucking hell, Y/n?"

"he-" I chewed my lip harsh enough to draw blood, while my back rested against the wall. "there was three bullets, you said it yourself. I knew there was a trick."

"so what?!" he hit the wall besides me, taking a shaky breath "it was damn obvious there was a fucking trick. That's not a reason for you to play the Russian fucking Roulette"

"what if he had killed himself?" I asked, hugging myself in a vain attempt to refrain my goosebumps.

"better him than you"

"Silas gave him the gun because of me. 'cause he was flirting with me" I explained "I didn't want his death in my conscience" I replied, gripping my forearms.

"yeah? Well I didn't want a bullet in your fucking skull and I almost got it" he bit back, choking on the last few words. "do something like that again and you're out"

"you can't fucking do that" I stated. "we're undercover, you can't make me leave."

"fuckin' bet, baby" he growled, trying to pass by me and open the door. He couldn't, though since I put myself between him and the door. "move your ass out of my way, Y/n"

"you really wanted one of the criminals we're chasing to get killed?"

"I swear to fucking God Y/n-"

"Tell me" I shoved him back for him to get away from the door "that you wouldn't have done something like that if you thought it was the right thing to do" when he, instead of replying, growled under his breath with his eyes on the ceiling, I repeated, "fuckin' tell me you wouldn't-"

We heard the door's lock clicking open and I panicked, afraid someone might have heard us.

"fuck"

I took a glance at the door, which was being opened.

"shit" When I turned to Chris again, I barely had time to process that he, with his hands gripping my hips, was backing me against the wall before hurriedly crashing his lips against mines.

"Hey guys- Okay" Toby stood there, holding onto the door frame, for a long minute, watching us making out. "they're fine!" he yelled, turning back to the room where everyone was. "I think they're gonna fuck!- sorry for the interruption, I'll give you some... Privacy"

With that, the door closed again and we were left alone in the dark. It was only when we were sure we were safe, that Chris let go of me.

We stood close to each other, breathing heavily. From my current angle, the moonlight made the tears in his face gleam.

Those tears that I didn't even know were there. Those tears that kept running down his cheeks nonstop.

"what are you fucking looking..."

He went silent when my arms wrapped around him, gripping the back of his jacket with both of my hands.

"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry" I whispered. "but I don't regret it. It was the right thing to do. Arturo didn't deserve that shit, you know it"

"you didn't either" he circled my hips, pulling me flush against him, like I was going to banish. "Goddammit, Y/n. You didn't either" he muffled a brief sob by burying his face deep into the crook of my neck. "God fucking damnit."

"nothing happened, Chris" I mumbled in a shaky breath, bringing him impossibly closer to me. "I'm fine"

"you scared the shit out of me" he muttered under his breath, letting himself rest against me. "I was so fucking terrified-"

"we're alright" I whispered, pulling away to wipe his tears.

After a beat of silence, he leaned on me an planted a tender, careful kiss on my lips. And it was easy to tell that this one wasn't feigned. This one had Chris' actual feelings on it.

"what was that?" I muttered, slightly confused.

"two weeks deep into this and you already put your life on the line three times" he explained with his jaw clenched. "I'll better come clean 'bout my feelings before you do something stupid and get yourself killed." I nodded, not really knowing what to say. "you... Don't have to- we can just keep pretending, it's fine with me" he cleared his throat, fidgeting with the hem of my jacket. "but, just in case, I needed you to know"

I nodded again without letting any word escape my lips. He waited for an answer that didn't come, and after a few seconds, he cleared his throat again and walked to the bed.

I frowned at him sitting on it. "we should wait a bit." he explained "they think we're fucking so-"

"it's gonna make it more complicated" I blurted out, half wining because, damn, I wanted to be with him. To actually be with him.

"why?" he questioned, resting his elbows over his thighs. "because we'll get too attached? Because we'll get hurt if something happens to the other?"

Those questions made me angry because they were, in fact, the reasons I was going to give him. Now that he had said them out loud, I realized they were stupid reasons.

We were already too attached to each other. We would get hurt anyway if something happened to one another.

"Y/n, I need you to say something"

I walked to him, sat on his lap, and caressed both of his cheeks with my hands. "Okay. Let's do this" I replied, pulling him into a kiss that was, by no means, meant to be rough, but ended up being it.

"Listen" he pulled away for an instant to take off his jacket and mine. "don't you fucking dare to play the Russian Roulette ever again."

"Okay" I pulled the tee off my body and tossed it to the floor. "I won't"

"promise you won't do anything stupid" he demanded, leaning to kiss my jaw, just to pull away to throw his shirt besides mine.

"I promise"

"Good" he cupped my cheeks, bringing me closer to kiss my lips. "cause I'm not sure if I'll be able to stay undercover if something happens to your reckless ass"

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