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#(also i didn’t cheat to get an answer i wanted i answered the same thing every time and went in mostly blind bc
marrycv · 15 hours
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Pick up your phone!
paring : toxic!ellie x toxic!reader
warnings : Mention of weed, alcohol. Ellie’s punishment with sex. Mention of nudes. Oral (e!receiving), fingering (r!reveiving). Language, nicknames such as : slut, doll, angel, baby, bitch, motherfocker (and others). mention of yn like twice. Mention of cheating and lying and many other bad things 😅. Ellie and reader are NOT healthy, do not romanticize their relationship, its fucked up. Porn w out plot? (kinda). Both reader and ellie are mean and does fucked up shit. 18+
summary : You wait Ellie again. she’s late for 4 hours and she wants to make it up to you. But you didn’t want to fall in her arms this time- which you obviously lost at trying to do. Ellie’s mad and has a punishment for you when she was in the wrong, and you had every right to be mad at her.
kinda a scrap this is bad 🙏
short asf
you :
00:12 - Ellie, where are you?
00:34 - Ellie istg answer me!!
1:02 - c’mon you said you’d come over today
Els 🖕🏻:
1:55 - im omw
1:57 - dont bother.
2:01 - im sorry im late
2:01 - you’re always sorry, dont come home and go fuck one of your stupid fangirls
2:02 - im coming over
2:02 - i said no
2:03 - c’mon lemme make it up to you 💋
2:05 - im gonna block you
2:32 - yn? !message not delivered!
“fuck” Ellie mumbled under her breath, going out of the studio and jumps in her Truck. going over speed’s limit and then knocking hard enough on your apartment to wake up everyone else in the combo.
you get up from your bed, unable to sleep due to waiting for her all night.
you open your door and when you see Ellie standing in front of it, smelling weed and alcohol, you know she wasn’t gonna be easy to deal with tonight.
“Ellie go home, its 3 in the morning…”
“cmon let me in baby” she said in a whisper, almost sounding like a whine.
You and Ellie’s relationship was complicated- that was what you were saying to your friends, because the amount of time you two broke up, that she cheated on you, that you would expose her nudes on internet, that she would sleep with a stranger just to piss you off and somehow you’d still let her come back in your arms- as she did the same with you. you would do shitty things as well, like saying to all of her fans that the concert was cancelled or that it changed location. you could also post on twitter her worse secrets when you learned that she cheated on you. you’d also make up lies about some random stuff just to get a revenge out of her.
but mostly she would just fuck up your trust for her like coming home 4 hours later or cheating on the infinite amount of girls. she’d also love bomb you to get you back and then would disappear for weeks. she also showed all of her band’s member the sextape she got of you- and you knew after Dina, the base player told it to you. You and ellie would randomly call eachothers- especially when she or you were under something, most likely weed or alcohol but sometimes something else. It wasnt rare that you would make her jealous and posting a story of you and a girl on instagram and she’d come over to fuck you dumb. only to wake up alone in the bed.
“ellie please i just wanna sleep tonight, no fight.”
“and please i just wanna say sorry, no fight.” Ellie answered, thinking she was a smart girl for this one
you rolled your eyes.
“are you even able to walk?” you asked her, seeing her flushed cheeks and her eyes red like hell
“of course i am baby, im okay.. please let me just make it up to you im so sorry im late”
“no youre not! because you wouldve told me you’d come home late or you wouldve just told me that you were busy!!!”
“im so sorry..” she says in a childish tone, just as if she was mocking you for being so mad.
“fuck off els”
Ellie rolled her eyes and made her way inside, taking steps closer to you.
“dont talk to me like that.” Ellie says, looking right into your eyes- mood changing suddenly, she didnt get the answer she wanted.
“you dont show up 4 hours late, bitch”
Ellie’s jaw tightened and she looked at you furiously
“tell me you just wanted to fuck me Ellie.”
“dont you ever call me ‘bitch’ again.”
“or what? you’re gonna leave? that already happened, i can survive it.”
“nah.. im gonna give you a lesson.”
“the fuck you mean?”
“get on your knees” Ellie said, tone demanding.
“i wont do shit you ask me to do Ellie.” you say scared of what she’s gonna ask you to do. you have some suspicions, but your mind is overthinking about so many possibilities.
Ellie puts her hands on your shoulders and force you to get you on your knees. She looks at you from down and she takes off her pants along with her boxers.
“you know what to do now.” Ellie tells you, intertwining her fingers with your hair, pulling you closer to her pussy. You start to give her short licks, obviously nothing enough for her.
“I swear to god you motherfucker if you dont do what-“
Ellie started but got cut off with one of her whines by you sucking her clit like your life depended on it. Your knees hurts, but her grip in your hair is too strong for you to move. your holding her by the thighs, moaning against her cunt by how good she tastes. obviously pussydrunk by her. and the perfect little grunts she would make made you so fucking wet. her hips would be jerking against your face, riding your tongue the best she could to chase your high. Ellie would never tell you, but you ever were the only one to make her cum. she knew that it would make your ego so much too high if she told you that on countless girls you were the only one able to please her. you know her sweet spots and she wasnt scared to be vulnerable with you. she always was. and you always were too.
“Fuck- fuck.. just like that, yeah”
her grunts would turn into whines and her whines into small moans. Ellie wasnt that much of a loud girl, but you knew if she was vocal- it was good. it made you laugh, sending vibrations through her clit.
“Im gonna- fuckkk!!” she moans out as she cums in your mouth. you still suck her clit as she rides your tongue for her high to be longer.
you get up from your knees and ellie kisses you, tasting herself on your tongue. the kiss turns rapidly messy and rough. Ellie would hold you by the hips, directing you by the bed. as soon as you touched the bed, she made you lay down on it and she got on top of you, still making out with you. her kisses got on your jaw until your neck. she then took a pause to look at you. you were eye doying her- she would always win. you were her little slut.
“only needed my” puts a finger into your core “fingers to shut that attitude huh?”
she takes off your shirt- which you were braless under it. peaking already your tits, ellie titled her head, smirking
“you got ready for me, doll?”
you nodded, wanting more of her.
“nuh huh, words baby, i want words.” she told you as the sucked one of your nipples as one of her hand was massaging the other breast. as her other hand was working on your clit to make you feel sooo good.
“j-just for you els!” you obey to her request, only wanting her to go faster.
“faster el- faster!!” you try to manage to tell her.
“faster huh?” Ellie says as she just slows her pace of her fingers brushing against that sweet spot of yours.
“please ellie!!” you beg for her to go faster as she just slows down again and again.
“i didnt say you’d get a good time Baby, this is your punishment, as deserved.”
“please.. ill be good Ellie- never gonna be m-mean with you ever” you faked promised her, just needed to tell her whatever she wanted to hear.
“yeah? you’d do this for me, angel?” Ellie asks as shes at only one finger, completely ruining you. completely making you cry for more- needing more.
“id do anything- just please fuck me ellie, fuck me.”
-
2 days after this huge mistake. You and Ellie started to do this kind of thing all the time. She’d piss you off, you’d be mad, she’d become madder for something she made you mad at- and would finish as sex. the only way you two did work out with.
she made you feel so good and you made her feel better.
This was unhealthy, but she was so addictive.
she’d come home in the middle of the night- wouldnt care if you were deep asleep or had a party- she’d take care of that pussy no matter what. Her songs would be about you two relationships.
Everyone liked it.
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and you were happy you had such a big impact that she wrote- and sang about you.
But she didnt see you that pretty- you were her fucking toy.
14:01 : why the fuck did you say that i was toxic in your song?
15:56 : because you are.
15:59 : fuck you els
16:01 : you wish <3
16:01 : you’re the toxic one in our relationship
16:30 : 💀💀 hell nah
16:31 : Ellie how many times did you cheat on me?
17:23 : babe, we were on break how many times do i get to tell you that?
17:23 : anyways i gtg ill see you tonight ;)
She wasnt easy and you werent either.
but whatever, she has become way more famous than ever.
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she’d send you those pictures before a show, trying to make you come to one (which you did but didnt tell her).
“does that feel good els?” you say as your face was in between her thighs, on your knees just like how she loved you like that.
“fuck babe dont stop!!” Ellie would tell you into a soft tone, not so much like that little ‘dominant’ cover she’s making everyone believe she was. she was always the one screaming your name over and over.
she then would make you see heaven with her cock filling you up, camera in one hand and the other one on your breast. She’d look at it all the time, rolling circles on her clit whenever she missed you and you blocked her so she couldnt ask you for any nudes- she has better, she could literally see you in action getting fucked by her.
she loved you, that was why she was so fucked up at showing it.
and you just were getting revenge for how she made you feel.
But in a way you two belonged together.
But she’d still use you for your amazing body and how good your tongue felt against her cunt.
you were her little stress reliever. (you’d let her do whatever she wanted to you- you’d just never tell her that)
request are open 💋
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marlenesluv · 8 days
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lando + dealing with his gf after cheating scandals
note: i do not view lando as a cheater in any way, shape, or form. but, amidst the new lando and magui rumors, i thought, “hmmm, what if these rumors circulated while he had a gf, aka reader, and it was because of lando and said gf not being public. so, mclaren needed pr for lando to be responsible, so they told him to go out with magui, EUGH, and yada yada you’ll get it!” also i changed locations and shit for the plot lol.
important note: it’s not okay to hate on magui, don’t do it. i don’t agree with what she’s done, but hate def isn’t the answer, especially with neither she, nor lando, gaf about what we have to say. i just used her since they have pics together so, you can imagine someone else if you’d like. the focus is lando x reader here :)
type: this is a head-cannon, but there’s mixes of smau.
pairing: lando norris x secret!gf!fem
warnings: angst but there’s fluff, dw
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۵ being landos secret girlfriend was difficult at times.
۵ when you were alone at your shared house? easy. you could talk as loud as you wanted, cuddle on the couch for hours, you could be a real couple.
۵ but once lando left for the races, it’s like he was a stranger.
۵ you felt like a fan watching her crush on television. not a girlfriend.
۵ a girlfriend would be there, in person, supporting her boyfriend. she would be there in the paddock, just like lily was. watching alex and hugging him after a race. or like rebecca, smiling up at her boyfriend like he put the stars in the sky as he won a race.
۵ but you? you watched your boyfriend from the couch, working and making sure that he hadn’t crashed between emails.
۵ yeah, lando would text you and call you, but that’s not the same. not when all you want to do is be there for him in person.
۵ but you couldn’t. unfortunately, last time lando had a girlfriend they broke up. they broke up because of the fans. lando felt pressured to move quickly with her, and he didn’t really even want to date like that. he just wanted fun at the time.
۵ not with you, though. you were different. he loved you and knew from the second you two met at the bar that you were meant for him. he loved everything about you. and neither of you wanted fans or media to ruin it.
۵ but nothing everything is avoidable. hearts get broken, even when- no, especially when you least expect it.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
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Liked by: f1wags, f1updates, and 72,194 others
f1wagupdates: update!! lando has been spotted today with magui corceiro in australia after the grand prix! fans saw they saw magui attend the race as well, and now the two and being seen hanging out? do we hear a new wag coming? a new couple?
view comments…
user4: i mean…she’s messy but ok
user1: she’s prettyyyy holy shit
user77: isn’t she friends with kika??
user25: yes!
user3: he doesn’t look happy….
user90: meh
user41: looks forced
user2: my mannnnn
user0: honestly, he needed a new gf. he’s been single foreverrrrr
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
۵ and after those headlines popped up, you were done for.
۵ tears? flowing. tissues? everywhere. landos calls? declined.
۵ you frankly didn’t want to talk to him. the mere idea of him cheating on you made you suck to your stomach.
۵ but maybe it made sense. he wanted a public relationship now…maybe?
۵ lando knew he should have told you. he knew he should have told you that mclaren told him o hangout with her to help pr. to make him seem responsible after the grand prix.
۵ lando knew he fucked up. and after not answering his texts and checking instagram and seeing the gossip posts, he knew why. the tags were insane, and he was stressing.
۵ the only girl he loved didn’t want to talk to him, and he was thousands of miles away.
۵ all because of a stupid pr stunt.
۵ lando booked a flight home as he sent a text to magui:
lando norris: hey, magui. i know this pr thing was supposed to last, but i’m done.
magui: oh…ok?
lando: sorry. can you book a flight for yourself?
magui: i’ll ask kika
magui: tell your girlfriend i’m sorry
lando: ???
magui: you obviously have one, lando. it’s fine. i’m sure she’s beautiful
lando: she is
*lando has blocked this number*
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
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Liked by: y/n.user, danielricciardo, and 1,925,105 others
landonorris: rumors are lame, so here’s the truth. i have a girlfriend, we’ve been dating for two years, and i love her with every fiber of my being. we’ve kept this relationship private for her safety and to go through everything as a pair, not in-front of the world. unfortunately, rumors spread, and they spread fast. but those rumors stem from mclaren pulling this pr move, one to make people think i was in a relationship to make me seem “responsible and mature.” whatever. i am, by the way. but i am in a relationship, not with magui though. i love you @y/n.user ❤️
view comments…
*only certain profiles can reply to this post*
y/n.user: oh my god. get home so i can smack you and then give you a kiss
landonorris: smack me??
y/n.user: you posted my TOES
oscarpiastri: double dates?
landonorris: well that’ll be thrilling
y/n.user: awwww that’s adorable yes
lilyzneimer: i just need to meet y/n too!!💞
danielricciardo: wow, he finally admits it
carlossainz55: i think everyone knew, mate. but ok!
charles_leclerc: congratulations! alex says she can’t wait to meet y/n!!
savnorris: bring her to christmas this year!!
landonorris: i will, don’t fret
olivernorris1: no one was “fretting”
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
۵ lando loved you, and he had to prove it once his plane landed.
۵ cuddles for days, home cooked meals (to his best ability), movie nights, appreciation posts, etc.
۵ you moved on from the incident. you understood, especially after an explaining from zak, along with a run down of paddock rules.
۵ races were fun, you loved going and the fans loved you.
۵ oscar’s girlfriend, lily, was wonderful and you two got along perfect. so talking with her while lando and oscar races was nice.
۵ you weren’t fond of how you got here, but you were fond of being here.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
(reposts, comments, and likes are appreciated!^-^)
1K notes · View notes
elllisaaa · 2 months
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Can I pls request seventeen reaction when they have a crush on reader they get jealous when she hangs out with her guy best friend (they are also super close) more than them?
hiii anonie ! i love that everyone keeps sending me these type of request for seventeen because i love to do them so so much ! hope you'll like it !
seventeen being jealous of your bff
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-> pairing : svt x gn!reader
-> word count : 2.7k
-> genre : fluff
-> reblogs and feedbacks are appreciated !
-> sorry for any mistakes, english is not my first language.
-> masterlist | svt masterlist
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CHOI SEUNGCHEOL
Despite Seungcheol being cute and sweet around you most of the time, he’s not so chill anymore when he sees you being all over another guy. He perfectly knows that he’s your best friend, perfectly knows that you want both of them to get along well because that’s why you asked him to come with you to this café, but he couldn’t help glaring at the other guy like he committed the worst crimes ever. Cheol tried his best to remain respectful and answer your best friend's questions, but he couldn’t help feeling a little jealous at watching you laugh with someone else about things he had no clue about. This would make him realize how bad he wanted to be with you, and how dumb it was of him to try and act as if he was not smitten by you. After this meeting during which he spent the whole time staring at the guy, he would plan the perfect confession to tell you how he feels about you and to not have to support this anymore. 
YOON JEONGHAN 
As usual, Jeonghan will act like a little shit. When you told him you wanted to plan a game night with him and your best friend so they could meet, he knew it was his chance to be insufferable. And he was the most annoying the whole night : cheating at every game and pretending to have done nothing, teasing your best friend for being a loser, and being the cheeky bastard he is. Deep down, he just felt like he was too late to confess to you about his crush, seeing how close and comfortable you seemed to be with this other guy. And it was only the worst side of him telling him to take some kind of revenge by being very irritating. Though Jeonghan would feel bad when you left and told him that he could’ve been nicer to your best friend. The last thing he wanted was to make you feel like he didn’t care about you and your emotions. It would take him a few hours of deep thinking before he sent you the longest text ever to explain his behavior and thus confess. 
HONG JOSHUA
Not being a very jealous person, Joshua didn’t expect the rush of anger that came with running into you and your best friend at the mall. There was seemingly nothing to be jealous about, you were just acting like a normal person being close and affectionate with their best friend. He was perfectly aware of that, but still, he felt like the third wheel while walking with the two of you. When he would try to talk to you, the other guy would always open his mouth and Joshua was getting really annoyed. Finally, your best friend left, leaving you with a pouty Joshua. You would ask him what’s wrong, and why he didn’t make an effort to get along with your best friend. And even if Joshua had been planning to confess for some time, trying to think about the most romantic way to do it, seeing another guy looking at you with the same lovestruck gaze he stared at you with was his last straw. He would tell you all about his feelings on the spot and pray inside that will not reject him.
MOON JUNHUI
He really holds his heart on his sleeve, so it’s not difficult to notice whether he’s happy or angry. Thus when you presented your long distance best friend that you hadn’t seen in a long time to him and his members, you could see how annoyed he was by the other guy's presence. You had every right to be all over someone you hadn’t seen in over a year, yes, but Jun felt a little bad anyway. You two had grown closer and closer, and he really thought that you had something special going on, that it was starting to be a little more than a casual friendship on your side too. But when he was seeing how you were acting around your best friend, he was not so sure anymore that you could maybe reciprocate his feelings. You were never so touchy with him, never so affectionate, never so flirty or straightforward. You would obviously notice how bothered and mostly sad Jun seemed to be the entire night but he kept saying that everything was okay, and he would end up leaving earlier because he could not stand the sight anymore. He would doubt a little but in the end, his friends will convince him to confess before it’s too late. 
KWON SOONYOUNG
He would think that he’s sleek, but frankly, even you could see that he was jealous of the bond between you and your best friend. You would often bring him with you for your friendly gathering because you didn’t want him to spend his weekends alone and he was getting along well with everyone. Everyone except Soonyoung who couldn’t seem to appreciate him. In all honesty, your best friend was a cool guy, but Soonyoung didn’t want to befriend the guy who could probably steal his crush if he tried. This would get to the point that you would get in a fight with him about it, clearly not pleased that he didn’t make any effort to try and talk with your best friend. Your argument would be really bad, and you would both ignore each other for a week or two, too proud to admit that both of you had some parts to take in the fight. Soonyoung will eventually come back to you, practically begging on his knees to let him back in your life and accidentally confessing along the way of his monologue. 
JEON WONWOO
Wonwoo is not one to get jealous easily, especially since you’re only his crush and not his partner, he has nothing to say in who you’re talking to and how you act with these same people. So to be honest, he’s not really jealous of the relationship you have with your best friend, but more of the way this guy is able to openly express his interest in you, always finding a way to compliment you and flirt with you without it making you uncomfortable. Which is precisely what Wonwoo is struggling to do, not knowing if saying that he finds you incredibly pretty in this or that outfit is off limits for “just friends”. Is it different because your bestie has no real attraction towards you and Wonwoo is genuinely trying to show you that he could treat you right ? Probably. But still, he’ll stay more quiet everytime your best friend is with you. You would assume that’s because he doesn’t feel too comfortable with people he doesn’t know much the first few times, and Wonwoo would take care that you don’t discover the real reason while taking mental notes of how to try and show you that he wants more as subtly as possible. 
LEE JIHOON
Since he’s always trying to remember the most insignificant details about you and what you like, he would take pride in knowing things that your best friend doesn’t. He would never say it out loud obviously, but still, the discreet smirk on his face would give it away. When you go out at a coffee shop, your best friend always has to ask you what you want when Jihoon simply brings you your usual because he got your order memorized. While your best friend always has to ask you what you want or need for your birthday, Jihoon always knows exactly what to gift you and he never misses. But every time you told him about the things you did alone with the guy, or what you had planned with him for the weekends, he felt a little jealous. At this point, he thinks you’re either not interested in him or that you’re just very dense and oblivious to all the subtle things he does to show his interest in you. You have so much partner privileges and he’s not even your boyfriend. Yet. Because it would take him only a few more times of your best friend missing on what you really like to rush and finish the song he wanted to confess to you with.
LEE SEOKMIN
He doesn’t hide his jealousy well at all, everyone who knows him a little bit is able to tell that he doesn’t like your best friend. He thinks that the guy is not handsome, not interesting and not even funny. Well, not as much as him at least. That is a lie because deep down, he can’t help but wonder if you really like this guy more than him. So Seokmin will try to take as much space as possible, talking louder and making a lot more jokes than usual so that your attention would be on him and not on your best friend. He’s always a little extra on a daily basis, but when your best friend is here too, he’s even more outgoing, to the point he becomes a little annoying. But the only way he has to be more interesting than your best friend is by doing all this, or so he thought. When you told him that it was in fact a little disrespectful for the other guy and that you didn’t understand why he could not try to befriend him when he was usually the sweetest, Seokmin felt like an idiot and apologized immediately, cheeks burning and trying to come up with an excuse. His crush is as well hidden as his jealousy (that is to say, not at all), so you’re only waiting for him to finally confess. 
KIM MINGYU
Another one who’s painfully obvious but he wouldn’t make a big deal of it in front of you, simply pouting and getting a lot quieter than he usually is. He will get so sulky, everytime he finds you laughing more at your best friend's jokes than at his. But he finds you so cute that he can’t stay mad at you for too long and he ends up liking the other guy because he’s obviously not mean nor annoying, Mingyu just can’t bear the thought of him snatching your attention away. And if he would of course never say a word about it to you directly, he will definitely complain about your best friend to some of his members, going on and on about why he can’t make up the fact that you like this guy more than him and that he can’t stand to hear you two joke around about things he doesn’t know about. Mingyu’s members would end up telling you to please do something about the situation because they can’t spend another two hours listening to why you should go out with him and not your best friend. He would be so shy when you address the issue with him, trying to deny it despite his red cheeks. But it’s okay because he’s very cute. 
XU MINGHAO
He's pretty level-headed so it's not easy to get him to feel jealousy. And if it ever happens, Minghao knows that this emotion is not rational because firstly, you told him time and time how much you loved your relationship with your best friend and didn't want it to change, and secondly, you were not his partner - yet - so he had no right to be jealous. Of course, he doesn't doubt your intentions and what you told him, but he can't help but be suspicious about how your best friend perceives you. Because the guy looks at you the same way Minghao does : with fondness, like you were his entire world. And that was the whole problem. Because Minghao had tried to give you some hints here and there for a few months, just to test the water and you seemed not to have pushed him away so he was happy. But seeing the way you did the same thing with your bestie when you had explicitly told him you didn't have any feelings for him got him worried. Maybe you didn't really like him in the end, maybe you were just trying to be kind and not hurt him ? So rather than being jealous, he would be anxious. It's probably what would give him the little push he needed to finally confess to you.
BOO SEUNGKWAN
I think he would try - and notice how I insist on try - to stay calm and collected because from an outside point of view, there is nothing wrong going on. But from his point of view, your best friend is clearly being too touchy and Seungkwan feels jealous even if he denies it. Because the nasty looks he gives your best friend everytime he hangs out with you kinda gives it away. He’s so obvious but won’t say a word about the real reason. Seungkwan will instead pretend it’s because he doesn’t get along with your best friend and dislikes him. He can’t stop himself from making snarky remarks, or mocking him under the guise of it being a joke. And he would have continued like that if you hadn’t told him one time that you were kinda sad that he didn’t like one of the most important people in your life. Seungkwan would feel bad and make an effort to at least tolerate the guy and be a little less mean but the side eyes everytime he did or said something he found embarrassing didn’t go away. He would certainly not be able to put up with this situation for long, and after another time of him not being nice to your best friend, you would have a silly fight during which he will confess. And magically, he was all gentle and friendly to your bestie after you became his partner. 
CHWE HANSOL
Hansol and you immediately clicked when you were introduced to each other, never going through the awkward stage of a friendship. So when you told him how, on the contrary, you stayed pretty long in this uncomfortable situation with your best friend before getting very close to each other, he felt kind of superior to the other guy, like his bond with you was much more real and valid. Hansol didn’t really know where all these feelings were coming from, nor why he felt so upset seeing you hug and be touchy with someone that was not him. Not that both of you were particularly physically affectionate, but you often had a hand on his arm when you talked, or you placed your head on his shoulder when you were watching a movie, or you held on to him or his jacket to not get lost when walking through crowded spaces. And Hansol thought that these moments were special, that he was special in a sense. This wouldn’t really be jealousy, but much more disappointment because he would think he read the signs wrong and start to cancel plans if he knows your best friend will be here. He would however decide to confess or at least do something to sort this problem when you told him that you were sad he was distancing himself from you.
LEE CHAN
Even if his crush on you is pretty obvious, his jealousy would not be so visible. Chan would choose to befriend your bestie instead because you know what they say : keep your friends close and your enemies even closer. So he’ll play the kind and fun guy around him, just to see how your best friend acts with you. And he’s clearly not having it, not loving at all the fact that he always touches you and tries to get closer to you. Sometimes, it even seems like you don’t even want him to touch you and swat his hands away but he always comes back pretending it’s a joke, playfully fighting. But Chan doesn’t need to be an expert in relationships to understand that this is clearly not okay, and he can’t help thinking that he would never do that to you, that he will always respect your consent. He’s also pretty sure that you have a thing for him too so he’s not going to put up with the situation for too long. Until then, he’ll subtly make comments or do things to make you understand his intentions more and to signal to your best friend that he’s not going to take you away from him anymore. 
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-> i don't allow any copies, reposts or translations of my work.
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svt taglist (fill in this to be added) :
@lil-kpopstan @hann1bee @iraisswiftie @bewoyewo
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drunk-fantasies · 3 months
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+18 CONTENT, MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
📼PAIRING: friend!heeseung x fem!reader
📼SYNOPSIS: all it ever took for heeseung was just one call from you, just like it was one question that ruined it all
📼GENRE: smut, angst at the end
📼WARNINGS: fwb-ish relationship, cheating, degradation, slapping (i guess?), oral, face sitting, cum eating
📼WORD COUNT: ~2k words
explicit content under the cut!
whenever you asked heeseung if he could come over, you promised yourself that it to be the last time and end whatever you had going on between you two afterwards. and you always did, yet it always ended with the same result — with you calling again after some time to make the bed shake and the air get steamy.
with his remarkable knowledge of all your weak spots he always managed to get you more and more addicted to him, and most importantly, make you feel way better than your boyfriend ever could.
how could he though? he didn’t know you that much and didn’t really seem interested. while heeseung, being your longtime friend, knew all your dreams, desires, and other fantasies even you were embarrassed about. he never judged you for them and just let you experiment with everything. he was not only the first guy you had sex with, but also the first to hold your hand, first to kiss you, and first to have a slow dance with you. your every possible romantic experience included heeseung, making everybody confused about how on earth you kept calling each other friends.
“y/n” he answered after a few signals. “what’s up?” he asked, knowing damn well what’s up.
“do you want to come over?” you asked almost in a sigh. “he’s gone.”
he remained silent for a second or two, only to let out a soft chuckle. “need me that much?”
“stop this and come here finally, you asshole,” you scoffed and smiled at his cockiness.
it didn’t take him long to knock on your door, thanks to the close distance between your homes. you ran up to them and opened them, revealing your best friend. he wore his usual jeans along with the jacket you chose for him on your regular shopping hangouts.
“how much time do we have?” he asked, just like always.
“not long,” you said quickly, pulling him inside.
the sound of you shutting the door behind him was followed by your body slamming against them. your lips found their way towards each other in a sloppy kiss. he placed his right hand on your waist and cupped your face with the left one. your tongues hungrily explored your mouths while your hands were busy taking off clothes. you felt him smile against your lips the moment you swiftly started to unbuckle his belt, yet he stopped you. you pulled away from him, confused.
“i thought you said that we can’t do this anymore,” he asked teasingly, looking at you from above.
you smiled coquettishly, leaning in. “you know i didn’t mean it,” you whispered and left feathery pecks on his earlobe and neck, making a slightly shaky breath escape his lips.
“does that mean you’re not going to say the same thing tonight?” your hands traveled down to his belt once again, but this time he didn’t stop your actions and just enjoyed the sight of you getting on your knees in front of him. you kept intense eye contact, just like he liked, and pulled his jeans entirely down, leaving his clothed hardness on full display.
“how do you think?” you asked and left little kisses on the fabric of his boxers. he was about to answer you but sucked air inside as you palmed him through the thin material.
“my little slut wants everybody to hear you gagging on me?” he managed to ask, petting your cheek and giving it a little slap. your little whimper at the stinging touch made him twitch, now painfully hard from your teasing. “answer me.” kicking away his trousers he took a step forward, making you stumble, your back meeting with the cold surface of your doors.
you nodded eagerly, tugging on the band of his boxers, and sent him a questioning look.
“my obedient pup,” he cooed and brushed lone strands of your hair behind your head and pushed it lightly towards his crotch. “do whatever you want, baby.”
that was all it took you to pull his last piece of garment down, revealing his dick, its tip glistening with a hot precum.
“enjoying the view?” he asked, making you realize you’ve been staring at him for a little too long. “must’ve missed me, huh?”
you nodded again with a pout. his hand traveled from your cheek to your mouth and pushed his long fingers as soon as you opened your lips.
“show me how you’re gonna suck me off. show me what that mouth does, slut.”
with closed eyes you gave yourself up to the suction of his two fingers, wishing it was his cock instead. your movements got quicker and more sloppy, saliva dripping out of your mouth and coating his digits.
the shameless sounds of slurping and moaning you kept making, made him want nothing more but your throat hugging his length tightly. without any word, he pulled his fingers out and didn’t waste time to replace them with his dick. at first, you gagged on it, poking the back of your throat, but still managed to hollow your cheeks and began to move further to his base. your movements just like on his fingers, at first slow and sensual, got greedy and sloppy in no time, too impatient to savor. your hands wandering up and down his thighs only added to the pleasure but also the desire to fuck your throat mercilessly. yet he held back from doing so, keeping the promise to let you do whatever you wanted tonight. though you fondling with his balls made it harder than he expected.
looking up you noticed his head falling backwards in pleasure. soon his hips began to buck against you, making it obvious of his incoming climax. you kept the pace and intensity and watched his reaction. he faced you again, mouth agape and eyes dark.
“you better not waste a drop of my cum, baby,” he said in a warning tone, preparing you for the hot load of his seeds that soon dripped down your throat.
licking him clean you topped it with an obnoxious pop. you were about to tease him more but you got interrupted. his palm squeezed tightly on your chin and motioned you to stand up, only to push your form against the door again. his lips attached to your sweet spot — the nape of your neck and your eyes rolled back. pulling away for a second to take off your top he continued to leave wet and purple marks on your delicate skin. he proceeded to unclasp your bra with ease and began to fondle your breasts.
“hee,” you whimpered at the feeling of his thigh at your crotch. “i thought you would let me do anything?”
“you also said we don’t have much time, yeah?” he tilted his head, eyes dark and needy. his breath continuously fanning your skin made you go crazy, drunk in his gaze and presence. you wanted nothing more but for this moment to last forever.
you nodded in response and yelped as he lifted you by your thighs. slowly he made his way to your bedroom, eyes not leaving yours, since he knew the way well at this point. instead of putting you on the bed and hovering above you like usual, he sat at the edge of your mattress, you sitting on his lap. his fingers traveled to your crotch, smiling at the wet patch on the fabric of your panties he whispered into your ear: “let me make you feel good.”
you let out an airy chuckle and answered in a whisper too: “you always make me feel good.”
you left his lap only for a second to get rid of the rest of your attire, only to climb onto him again and push him lightly on the mattress. with a cocky smirk, he watched you straddle first his waist and then his head. your glistening folds right in front of his eyes made him pull you downwards, sitting on his face completely. his hot breath sent shivers to your core and before you could say anything he started leaving feathery kisses on your clit. subconsciously you let out a long whine tugging at his hair. his hands found their way to your ass and gave them good squeezes and slaps now and then. your eyes kept on rolling back with every movement of his tongue that now did wonders on your pussy, right where you needed him the most. your eyes met with a picture of you and your boyfriend that you kept on your nightstand as a reminder to moan the right name whenever you didn’t cheat. but now it was rather redundant and even unwanted, so you quickly laid it, photo facing the wooden surface. you closed your eyes, smiling blissfully, and started to move your hips against heeseung’s mouth. he always gave you his everything, now eating you out so good. feeling how the knot in your stomach threatened to untie you took a firm hold of his head with your both hands to hold it in one place as your hip movements became more merciless. with a long moan, you came all over his face. he licked you clean and helped you lay down next to him
“why are you even with him?” he asked all of a sudden.
you felt how your heart stopped and jumped all the way to your throat, making it hard to breathe, especially in the moment you needed it the most.
“what?” you panted, confused to what his question was supposed to lead up to.
“why are you even with him, when he clearly can’t satisfy you?” his stare was nowhere near his usual look full of care and warmth. it made you nervous, even though you expected it to finally happen. “does he even love you? do you love him?” his words hurt not your feelings but pride.
“what do you even know, heeseung. you’re not part of my relationship so how dare you speak about it?” you scoffed and sat up, starting to pick up your clothes that were currently scattered across the room.
“i started to be part of it the moment you called me over, and didn’t even tell me you had a boyfriend. the moment you started cheating on him.”
“oh, you’re not going to give me mortality lectures.” you shook your head vigorously and pulled up your shorts. “you know why? you’re wrong about my relationship, we love each other and you heeseung, you’re just the other man, nothing less, and nothing more.”
the silence made you face him. his expression stayed the same. a light chuckle escaped his mouth. “then find yourself somebody else to be your other man, y/n.”
he took his time getting dressed without sparing you a single glance, while you started to regret what you’d done. wasting your longtime friendship just because your lack of feelings for your boyfriend got rightfully called out seemed stupid, even completely puzzling.
but he knew he was right. if he wasn’t you wouldn’t call him whenever your boyfriend was out of the town or even two blocks away, hanging out with his friends. deep down in your subconsciousness, you knew that too, but with your ego completely howling your sanity down it was pretty hard to realize why you always called particularly heeseung.
even when he closed the door to your apartment behind him, and somehow put everything you two had to an end, didn’t make you stand up and run to him, despite your strong urge to do so. instead, you just laid back down, facing the empty spot he left in your bed. his scent still hovered over your bedroom, just like a few wet spots on your skin of his kisses. reaching for his pillow you hugged it tightly and let yourself cry.
it’s really the end. he’s gone.
a/n sorry i kinda lost interest in it so some parts may be a little rushed and some things escalated quickly but yeah :) enjoy
tags: @nycapartmentsworld
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babybluebex · 3 months
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i saw ur message abt angus tully requests and🙈🙈 if u feel like it i would love to read a first kiss fic, but honestly i'd read anything !!!!
as you requested... :) word count: 1k
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When you first met Angus, you didn’t consider him as someone you could fall for. He was a little short-tempered, a little too sarcastic for your tastes, but he was smart— even though you didn’t go to the same school, he still came into town on Wednesday afternoons and met you at the library to tutor you in biology. Even though Angus could definitely be hard to deal with sometimes, he helped you get the grades that you needed, and you were endlessly appreciative of him. 
Your biology midterm was next week, and you and Angus should have by all means been studying, but you weren’t. You were listening to him talk about his school, the prestigious Barton Academy, and how the all-boys school wasn’t exactly conducive to finding a date. “Not that I even wanna go to winter formal,” Angus said, twirling his pencil in his fingers. “But my mom and stepdad say I should.” 
“Who’re you taking?” you asked. Your school also had a dance at the end of the semester, but you guys weren’t fancy enough to call it a “formal”. You were also in need of a date, and had briefly considered just going by yourself; you were better off on your own, anyway. 
Angus shrugged. “Not a lot of girls for me to ask,” he said. “Not that any girl would wanna go out with me anyway.” 
“Oh, whatever,” you scoffed, gently erasing your work on your paper and rewriting the answer. “You’ve gotta have girls swooning all over you.” 
Angus barked out a laugh. “You flatter me,” he grumbled. “You think girls give me the time of day? That’s really funny.” 
You lifted your eyes from your paper up to Angus’s face, and you scrunched your eyebrows. “I mean, why not?” you asked. “You kinda have that Bob Dylan thing going on; if you went to my school, you would be everybody’s favorite.” 
“Mm, but I don’t go to your school,” Angus hummed. “The guys at Barton think I’m just a pest.” 
“Well, I don’t think that,” you offered lightly. “I think you’re pretty cool.” 
“Thanks,” Angus said softly. “I think you’re… Ahem, pretty cool too.” His cheeks went red as he cleared his throat, and his eyes flicked down to your textbook to break eye contact. Suddenly, he was quiet, his face burning; you had never seen Angus be shy before. 
“Angus?” you said. He said nothing, his teeth nibbling on his bottom lip, and you reached out to him, letting your fingertips brush his chin, lifting his face to look at you. You tilted your head as you watched him squirm, but he made no effort to move your hand from his face or try to move you away. “You know what I mean… When I said you’re pretty cool, right?” 
Angus took a breath, and he nodded quietly. “I meant the same thing,” he admitted. “Only, I… I’ve never had a girlfriend before. I don’t know how to do this.” 
Your hand dropped from his face, and you took up his hand from the table, twining your fingers together with his. His skin was soft and cold, and his grip was immediate and strong. “I’ve never had a boyfriend before,” you told him. “A real boyfriend, at least.” 
“What’s a real boyfriend?” Angus asked, leaning forward in his seat to get closer to you. 
“I don’t know,” you whispered. “I mean, like… I’ve never had a guy get all shy around me or anything. Act like he really likes me, and isn’t just dating me to cheat off of me in history class.” 
Angus chuckled breathlessly. “Well, you don’t have to worry about that with me,” he said, and you smiled. “Umm… Can I… Kiss you? I’ve kinda wanted to ever since I met you…” 
“Have you ever kissed anyone before?” you asked. 
“Have you?” Angus asked quickly. 
“I asked you first,” you smiled, and Angus huffed as he chuckled. 
“Um, no,” Angus coughed. “I’ve always gone to all-boys schools… Last time I had a girl I talked to regularly, I was in preschool. And that doesn’t really count, I think.” 
“Probably not,” you agreed. “I’ve kissed one other guy before. It was the boyfriend who would cheat off of me, and he kissed me sometimes, but… Never anything else.” 
“Okay, so you’re marginally more experienced than I am,” Angus said and jokingly rolled his eyes. “You can’t get mad at me if I’m a bad kisser.”
“I would never,” you told him. You both hesitated for a moment, trying to read each other’s minds, and, before you could speak first, Angus cupped your cheek with his soft palm and leaned in, pressing his lips to yours. You didn’t hesitate to lean into his kiss, reaching out and wrapping your fingers around his thin wrist, and he sank into you, letting himself relax. 
You finally broke the kiss with a big smile, and Angus chuckled, and you shifted away quickly when your teeth clacked together. “Was that good?” Angus asked, nervously pressing his lips into a thin line as his eyes stayed locked on yours. “Why’re you laughing, was it that bad?” 
“No, sweetheart, I’m not laughing at you,” you chuckled, shaking your head. You watched his cheeks go pink again at the pet name, and you said, “I’m just… Happy.” 
“Good,” Angus said. His hand reached for yours, pressing his fingers between yours, and he said, “Right... What were we talking about?”
“Well, we were talking about, like, biology and stuff, for my exam next week,” you said. “But then we started talking about your winter formal and my school dance, and how we didn’t have dates.” 
“Oh, right,” Angus said. “Umm… I-I guess, maybe, if you want, I could go with you to your dance.” 
“As my date?” you asked, and Angus nodded. “I think I’d like that a lot. And maybe I can be your date to the winter formal?” 
“As long as you can deal with the stuck-up pricks at my school,” Angus grumbled, and you grinned, leaning in and kissing Angus’s cheek. 
“Whatever you want, sweetheart.” 
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supernovafics · 4 months
Text
𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃 𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐓 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 (𝟐)
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PART ONE | PART TWO
pairing: singledad!steve harrington x divorcedmom!fem!reader
word count: 15.9k words
summary: in which you hate him and he hates you— and that mutual disliking is perhaps the only thing you and him manage to agree on. you make it your mission to avoid and ignore steve at all costs, and nothing more or less than withering stares and annoyed eye rolls are shared among you both whenever you have to see each other, which luckily isn’t that often. but when your son and his daughter end up in the same first-grade class and quickly become friends, it forces things to change between you two. it means that you and him also have to be friends, or, at the very least, tolerate each other’s presence. which is something that is much easier said than done
warnings: modern!au, enemies (to friends) to lovers, steve and reader are in their late 20s/early 30s, bestfriend!eddie, mentions of cheating/an affair (reader’s ex was an absolute asshole), mentions of trust/abandonment issues, some angst, platonic fluff (at first), smut (18+)
author's note: the second and final part! not much to say except enjoy enjoy and happy (almost) new year🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
“Do you like Maddie’s dad?”
Hearing that abrupt question fall from Oliver’s lips confused you so much that all you could do was initially answer with a bewildered, “What?”
You were used to Oliver always asking random questions that felt as if they came out of absolutely nowhere; it was especially one of his favorite things to do during any sort of car ride, and this Saturday morning drive to the soccer field for practice was apparently no different. But, you fully did not expect to hear that question from him. 
“Are you guys, like, boyfriend-girlfriend?” He asked, and that follow-up question further confused you, or maybe it more so startled you.
“No… No, we’re not,” You answered and glanced at him sitting in the backseat through the rearview mirror. He was dressed in his dark green soccer uniform, wearing everything except for the cleats because he liked to put them on right before he ran out onto the field with the other kids. “What made you think that?” 
“I don’t know…” You could practically hear him shrug. “But, I think it would be cool if you guys were. Maddie thinks so too.”
You weren’t entirely sure what to say to that. “Oh, okay… But, I don’t think that will happen, bud. We’re friends. Just like you and Maddie.”
“Okay.”
It suddenly felt like perfect timing that you were pulling into the gravelly parking lot next to the soccer field. You helped Olly put on and tie up his cleats before he ran over to Maddie and the other kids already on the field. You grabbed the two coffees that were sitting in the cupholder and then headed to the silver metal bleachers, immediately spotting Steve among the other parents.
He gave you a quick wave and smile and you only nodded and smiled back at him since your hands were full and you couldn’t match his wave. It still felt the tiniest bit insane to you that what you had said to Oliver in the car wasn’t a complete lie; you and Steve were in fact friends, and had been for the past month. 
Just days after you two had the moment in your kitchen where the “enemies” hatchet was finally buried, he and Maddie came to the coffee shop sometime in the afternoon. For the first time ever, you didn’t feel like you needed to pretend to be nice to him. Instead, you found yourself actually wanting to be nice and you were glad about this surprise playdate. And that was when you knew that you two were friends, or at the very least, quickly getting there.
He and Maddie stayed for hours. With Maddie and Oliver sitting and playing games in a two-person booth, and Steve standing with you at the front counter. You two talked about random things— the kinds of things that you had a feeling you both would’ve learned about each other during your first-ever conversation if you two had actually been nice to one another— and then you let him try a new drink recipe that you had been playing around with because he was interested, and that became a sort of routine.
“Hi. Morning. Here.” You handed him one of the cups in your hand before taking your spot next to him in the middle row of the bleachers. “It’s another new thing I’m thinking about adding to the menu for the rest of Fall and maybe Winter too. Tell me your thoughts.”
He took a sip of the drink and then nodded. “This is good. Not as insanely sweet as the last thing you made me try.”
“Okay, I know you hated that latte that I gave you last week, but it’s actually been a big hit so far,” You told him. The sweet drink quickly became popular among the high schoolers that would frequent the coffee shop, and you were glad that you listened to Jude— one of your employees who was also a part of that younger demographic— and put it on the menu. “Oh, also, I think you and I might be getting parent trapped soon.”
“Should I be scared?” Steve asked, looking at you with a confused expression.
You stopped mid-sip of your drink. “Wait, have you not seen The Parent Trap?”
He shook his head. “No.”
“Jesus, wow, you need to watch that movie, it’s a classic,” You told him, the shock you felt was evident in your tone. “Anyway, though, what I mean is that I think Olly and Maddie are gonna try to get us together. He mentioned in the car ride over here that they both think it would be cool if we started dating.” 
“Oh.”
“I already told him that that wouldn’t happen and we’re just friends, so hopefully that idea will blow over soon,” You said to Steve and then took a long sip from your drink. 
“Knowing our kids, I kinda doubt that will happen,” He responded, and you actually couldn’t help but agree with him. The way Maddie and Olly had managed to convince you and Steve about the playdate thing after a week’s worth of pestering proved that they wouldn’t let go of anything easily. Thinking about it now, you kinda admired how persistent they had been during then.
“Well, in that case, it’s good that they don’t look alike so they can’t try to switch places. But, we need to make sure that we stay away from boats and camping trips.”
Another confused expression crossed Steve’s face. “I really think I need to watch that movie.” 
“Yes, you do,” You said with a nod as you met his eyes. “As my friend, you need to promise me that you will watch that 1998 classic.”
He laughed a bit. “I promise.”
You turned your attention back to the soccer field and shook your head. “I never thought I’d say that.”
“What?”
“That we’re friends,” You said, looking at him again. “But, it’s nice, though.”
Steve nodded at that and gave you a small smile. “Yeah, it is.”   
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
Over the past year, you’d come to savor anytime after 9pm. It was the only time of the day, well night, that you were able to have complete peace— no worrying about Oliver because he was asleep, and no worrying about the coffee shop because it was closed. 
On this particular night, long after Olly’s soccer practice and time spent at the coffee shop, you were in your bathroom, washing your face and putting on pajamas; which simply consisted of a random oversized t-shirt and shorts. You decided that you’d curl up in bed and spend the rest of your night watching a shitty reality show because it somehow always felt nice watching other people’s drama. 
Right as you were slipping on your t-shirt, your phone started ringing on the counter, which stopped the music that you had been playing from it, and you looked down to see that it was Steve FaceTiming you. 
This had happened a handful of times over the past month— him calling you, you calling him. It was usually to get quick answers to questions that either of you two had, but sometimes it was also just to talk about random things whenever a simple text didn’t feel like it would suffice. 
“Hi,” You said as you turned off the bathroom light and shut the door before heading to your bed. “Great timing. Oliver went to sleep about fifteen minutes ago.”
You noticed that Steve was also sitting in bed. He pushed a quick hand through his hair as he spoke. “I learned that if I’m gonna call, I should only do it after nine now.”
The last time he FaceTimed you, Oliver had been sitting next to you on the couch. When he heard Steve’s voice, he immediately asked him where Maddie was, and then she heard Olly’s voice from where she was playing in the living room. Barely a second later, your phones were immediately taken by the kids and they talked for an hour. 
“Great thinking,” You told him with a small approving nod. “I hope that whatever you called to talk about is good because I was just about to watch a very riveting reality show about these housewives taking a trip around Europe.”
“Wow, that sounds very fun,” Steve said, and you could hear the sarcasm in his voice.
“Mhm, it will be. I can’t wait until they get to Paris. According to the trailer, some huge argument is gonna happen when they’re at the Arc de Triomphe,” You responded, matching his sarcastic tone.
“Now, I’m really intrigued,” He joked. “Anyway, though, I called to tell you that I just finished watching The Parent Trap.”
You smiled at that. “I’m glad you did your homework early. Did you like it?”
“It was actually pretty good. Maddie watched some of it with me too, but she fell asleep not even halfway through.”
“She’s too young to understand the cultural importance of The Parent Trap just yet. She’ll come around soon.”
“Also, right after practice, she mentioned the dating thing to me. She said that she and Olly think it would be nice if you and me got together.” 
You let out a small sigh. “Really?”
“Yeah,” Steve nodded. “She was very persistent too; asked if I thought you were pretty, and said that I should bring you flowers the next time I see you. Apparently, Oliver told her that your favorite ones are daisies, so I should make sure to get those for you.”
Your eyes widened a bit at his words. If you weren’t so shocked, you were almost certain that you would’ve laughed at how much thought your kids were putting into this whole idea. “Oh, wow, they’re relentless.”
“Are daisies actually your favorite?”
“Yeah,” You answered and then sighed again. You weren’t even entirely sure how Oliver knew that. When you two first moved into your house in Hawkins, you would buy fresh daisies every week in an attempt to make the place feel like a home because you barely had any furniture just yet and there weren’t that many decorations up either. But you couldn’t remember the last time you bought any flowers for the place.
Steve let out an amused sound. “Wow, yeah, Maddie and Olly are good.” 
You dating someone was the farthest thing from your mind, but it surprised you that it was the main thing on Oliver’s. You thought that you’d have a longer time before you’d have to worry about that; before you’d have to think about him really wanting some sort of “dad” or “father figure” in his life. Eddie was the closest thing, but Oliver didn’t see him as often anymore since his California move. 
You thought that the little family that you and Olly had, just the two of you, was enough— more than enough, even. 
“I didn’t think that this would happen this soon,” Steve said, pulling you out of your thoughts. “It’s only been a year since her mom left, so I really didn’t think that she’d want me to start dating, get married, whatever, whatever, anytime soon. And I’m too busy to even think about trying to look for someone.”
You agreed with him completely. And then there was also the fact that you simply didn’t want to date anytime soon. You despised the thought of finally having to start over; even though you knew that eventually one day you would. Maybe. 
As cynical and depressing as it sounded, you couldn’t really imagine it happening for you again— falling in love or just simply falling, deeply liking someone. And a part of you would just rather wholly avoid the possibility at all costs. 
You knew that how things ended with Oliver’s dad was not your fault at all, but that didn’t change the fact that you still felt stupid about everything; for being so blind to the affair and for believing his lies for as long as you did. And the thought of all of that potentially happening again— loving and trusting someone just to have them break your heart and fuck you over in one of the worst ways possible— terrified you. 
You could’ve said all of that to Steve, but you felt like that would’ve been way too long-winded and melancholic, so you decided to just simply nod instead. “I don’t know if we should just get used to them trying to get us together, or talk to them and say that us being anything more than friends is never gonna happen.” 
“If it becomes too much we probably should talk to them,” Steve said, and that made sense to you. “But now I’m glad Maddie fell asleep halfway through the movie because it probably would’ve just given her ideas.”
“Have you seen Freaky Friday?”
“No. Is that another movie that can relate to the situation we’re in right now?” 
“No, it’s just a really good movie. Another Lindsay Lohan classic,” You briefly explained. “You should watch it.”
Steve was quiet for a moment, as if he was really thinking about whatever he was about to say. “How about right now?” 
You laughed a bit before mock gasping at his question. “You trying to get me off the phone, Steven?”
He smiled at your fake offended look. “No, I meant that we could watch it right now. Together over the phone.”
“Oh,” You said, trying to hide your surprise at the suggestion. Watching a movie together was technically a friendly thing to do, but it did feel the tiniest bit intimate; like the two of you were crossing into a slightly altered territory of what your friendship was. That still didn’t make the idea necessarily sound bad to you, though. It sounded fun, a better way to spend the rest of your Saturday night than what you had originally planned on doing. “Okay, yeah let’s watch it. I guess I’ll just have to watch the housewives go to Europe at a different time.”
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
“How’s it going so far?” Was the first thing you heard Eddie say when the call connected, and you couldn’t help but smile into your phone at how excited he sounded. It made you happy that you impulsively decided to call him when you stepped into the back room of your coffee shop; the kitchen area that felt equivalent to a second home for you. “It’s great, right?”
You nodded even though he couldn’t see you. “Yeah, it’s been really good, honestly.”
The “it” that you both were referring to was the open mic night event happening at the coffee shop right then. Eddie had been the one to suggest the idea nearly a year ago, around the time when the shop finally opened.  
“It would make so much sense,” Was the beginning of his spiel. “This place is the perfect size to set up mic stands and speakers in the front by the window. Pretty much any sort of ‘starving artist’ would love to have a space where they can perform, and most people enjoy live music, so doing this will bring in a ton of business.”
You loved the idea and you agreed with Eddie’s points completely, but then he moved to California and it didn’t feel right to do the idea without him. But, he said that he wouldn’t let you not do it. Because no other place in the small town was doing something like this— and that very valid statement was the reason why tonight was already such a success. A part of you wished that you had done the event sooner, instead of continuously putting it off for months and months. 
The setup of it was simple— anyone with any sort of “talent” that they wanted to share was welcome to perform, and after a particularly awkward magician, the majority of the performances were musical, and almost everyone that decided to go up and sing or play something so far were pretty good. You had even teared up at a brother-sister duo that performed a self-written instrumental piece on the guitar and violin. 
“I would say an ‘I told you so,’ but I love you too much to be that much of an asshole right now.”
“Yeah, and another reason why you shouldn’t say any kind of ‘I told you so’ right now is because I’m still slightly mad at you for bailing at the last second and not being here tonight,” You responded, letting out a small sigh. You leaned against the metal table in the middle of the kitchen where a sheet of freshly baked cookies sat next to you. Eddie was also supposed to be sitting next to you at this moment, sneaking a cookie off the sheet, and then you getting playfully annoyed at him for doing so.
“I know, and I’m still really sorry. My publicist decided to set up something early tomorrow that I can’t get out of,” He said, re-explaining what he had already told you earlier that morning. Of course, you weren’t truly upset with him; he was doing what he loved out there in California, and you were doing what you loved right here in Hawkins. “Is Steve there yet?”
“Yeah, he got here like ten minutes ago. I’ve been so busy, though, so I haven’t gotten the chance to say much more than a quick hi to him.” 
Eddie hummed in response. “Has he fully replaced me yet?”
“Oh, shut up. Steve could never replace you, Munson,” You told him, your words a thousand percent true. “You’re more than just my best friend at this point, you’re like my fucking family. You cannot be replaced, and that also means that you can never get rid of me either, so I hope you understand what you’ve gotten yourself into.”
“I wouldn’t dream of getting rid of you,” He said, and you could practically hear the smile in his voice; you really missed him being only a ten-minute drive away.
“Thank you. I feel honored. Truly,” You said playfully.
“Oh, also, are Oliver and Madeline still trying to play matchmaker for you guys?” Eddie asked and you rolled your eyes at how amused he sounded. 
Somehow, your attempt in the car that Saturday to shut the dating idea down by telling Oliver that you and Steve were just friends, seemed to go in one ear and out the other. Olly would continuously remind you how much he liked Steve, how cool he was, and how he’d always have the best snacks whenever the kids were having a playdate at his house. Oliver even went as far as to tell you to wear more blue because that was Steve’s favorite color. 
And pretty much the same thing was happening to Steve but with Maddie. According to him, she gushed about you all of the time— perhaps actually convincing Steve to get her a fish only aided in that— and she continued to pester him about buying you flowers. 
But, their antics started calming down over the past few weeks, though, because of every gentle reminder you said to Oliver about how you and Steve were solely friends. It was way too hard to be stern about it because you hated disappointing him and you just really wanted him to be happy. But, before Steve came around, you thought that he was really happy with how things were. 
When you verbalized that thought on the phone to Eddie right then, he simply told you, “Just like you want him to be happy. He wants you to be happy too.”
“Why does he think that happiness comes from Steve?”
“Maybe he and Maddie see something that you two don’t see yet.”
You thought about his words. For a second, you wondered what the kids could possibly see that you and Steve seemed to be oblivious to. 
“Okay, and on that note, I’m gonna go. I’ve probably been gone for far too long. I told Jude that I was just going to grab the cookies that had been cooling for a few minutes and bring them out,” You told him as you took a quick glance at the mix of chocolate chip and sugar cookies again. “I’ll see you in less than a month for Christmas. Oh, and about that, you really didn’t need to buy me and Olly first-class plane tickets.”
You heard his playful scoff. “You guys are my family. Of course, I’m gonna get you first-class tickets.”
“Thank you, and this spoiling treatment is exactly why you’ll never be able to get rid of us,” You said and smiled when you heard Eddie laugh. “Anyway, I’ll talk to you soon.”  
“Bye.”
When he hung up, you slipped your phone back into the back pocket of your jeans. You grabbed the now cooled cookie sheet and exited the kitchen, going back behind the counter with Jude. Since things had somewhat simmered down compared to how lively it had been an hour and a half ago, you told her that she should finally take her break for the night and she happily accepted the offer.
Steve walked up to you as you started placing the cookies in the display case. “Hi.” 
“Hey, thanks for coming.”
“Yeah, of course, I wouldn’t miss it,” He said, and hearing how genuine his words sounded made you smile. 
“It’s probably too late for coffee, so do you want a hot chocolate?” You asked and looked at him once you finished putting the last few cookies in the case. “It’s free. Friend discount for the night.”
“Wow, that’s a really good discount,” Steve said playfully.
“I like to be very generous to the people I care about,” You told him, matching his tone and smiling. “And I don’t have that many friends, so I’m actually not losing out on a lot of money.” 
He smiled back at you. “Now I feel even more honored that I’m one of them.”
You poured some hot chocolate into the blue mug that you would never admit out loud but was pretty much designated as Steve’s at this point. For some reason, you found yourself always making sure to use it for him whenever he wasn’t getting something to-go, and once you learned from Olly that Steve’s favorite color was blue, it felt even more right to use it for him. In your mind, you saw it as a small gesture that didn’t really mean too much, but maybe that wasn’t entirely true. And that was another thing that you’d never admit out loud. 
“Thank you,” He said as you handed the mug over to him. The small smile he gave you let you know that he recognized the gesture and probably had been for the last month and a half. 
Instead of acknowledging the mug or the hot chocolate or anything else, you nodded your head in the direction of the makeshift “stage” area that you had set up earlier with the help of Jude. 
“Any secret talents you want to go up there and share?” You asked, only slightly joking with your question. “There’s a full waiting list, but I can move you to the top, and I promise I won’t tell anyone.” 
“No, it’s okay, I’d rather not cut in front of everyone that was here before me. Next time, though,” He answered and it was easy to hear the sarcasm dripping from his voice.
“I will definitely hold you to that next time,” You said, playing along with him. “So, what’s your talent? Something tells me that you’re killer at the guitar. Ooh, wait, actually the triangle!”
Steve only gave you an unamused look and you tried your hardest to hold back your laughter.
“I’ll take that as a no to the triangle.”
“I’m gonna change the subject now,” He said, and you nodded, deciding to allow it to happen even though you had at least three more triangle jokes ready to go. “Can you please not let me forget to get some cookies for Maddie before I leave? She’s at my parent’s house for the night, but I promised I’d have some for her tomorrow so she can have them right after the soccer game.”
“Of course, I’ll put some to the side for her,” You told him. “I know the chocolate chip ones are her favorite. Same as Oliver.”
“Where is Olly?”
“At home with a babysitter— this super nice eighth grader that lives next door to us. She texted me half an hour ago that he finally fell asleep after watching Finding Nemo two times.”
“Maddie’s current movie obsession is Monsters Inc.,” Steve said with a small laugh. “We’ve been watching it at least once a night for the past week.”
“That’s a great one. She has good taste,” You said and Steve nodded.
You wanted to keep talking to him, but the sound of the music quieting down and soft clapping pulled you out of the conversation. 
“I’ll be right back. Gotta go announce the next person going up. Are you sure you don’t want it to be you?” You asked him teasingly.  
Steve only shook his head and rolled his eyes at you as you started walking away. 
You went up and introduced the next person, a middle-aged guy with a guitar who started playing the acoustic version of a song that you vaguely recognized from the radio. 
Steve was still standing right where you left him, lingering by the front counter and drinking from his mug, and you headed back to your spot behind the counter. He mentioned the PTA meeting last night that heavily talked about the Winter Carnival happening next week and Leslie, the head of the PTA, told everyone what their jobs would be— Steve was assigned to the popcorn station and you were put on the ring toss game. You and Steve already made plans to take the kids Saturday night since the First Grade parents only had to “volunteer” on Friday. He laughed at a joke you made right then about being surprised that you weren’t being forced to “volunteer” Friday and Saturday to make up for the fact that you didn’t help out last year.
Things went like that for the next hour— you two talking and laughing with one another, and some people coming up to order teas and hot chocolates and the occasional latte— until the time hit nine o’clock and the night came to its end. After giving a generous round of applause to the final performer and you announcing the end of this first open mic night, everyone slowly started heading out. 
A few people came up to you, telling you how great the night was and saying that you needed to do this again. You made a mental note to text Eddie later and once again thank him for this idea, and you’d maybe even let him finally say an “I told you so.”
You bagged up three chocolate chip cookies for Madeline and were about to hand them over to Steve, who was now sitting in an empty booth, and say your goodbye to him when Jude came up to you. There was a look on her face that resembled a cross between annoyance and slight worry. 
“I’m so sorry. I just got a call from my brother. He broke his arm while at his friend’s house and he’s at the hospital right now. And my parents are out of town for the weekend, so I’m the only “adult” around who knows all of the insurance stuff and everything, so I have to go. I’m sorry.”
The look on her face immediately made complete sense to you right then. Ever since you hired Jude eight months ago, you became very used to hearing her teenage rambles about her ten-year-old brother who she would constantly describe as the “bane of her existence.” Therefore, the fact that she was annoyed about this incident wasn’t surprising, but it was also a little heartwarming to see that you could tell that she was also, at least, the tiniest bit worried about him. 
“Yes, go. I completely understand. I hope he’s okay.”
“He’s an idiot, but he’ll be fine,” She responded as she joined you behind the counter for a second to grab her jacket that was hanging on one of the hooks and then started heading to the front door. “I’m really sorry again.”
“Don’t worry, it’s okay. I promise. Go, go,” You told her and she nodded. The bell chimed as she opened the door, and chimed again when it fell shut. 
You went over to Steve, sitting down across from him and handing over the bag of chocolate chip cookies. 
“Thanks,” He said, giving you a small smile. “I can stay and help you clean up if you want.” 
“I hope you really mean that because we’re past the point in our friendship where I would politely decline that offer to be nice. I’d actually really love some help right now.”
Steve laughed a bit. “I do mean it. And I owe you for the free hot chocolate and cookies.”
“You don’t owe me at all because that was the friend discount, but I will still accept that reasoning,” You said and smiled at him before slipping out of the booth. 
It was second nature for you to silently go into the routine that you were so used to doing at the end of every night— clearing mugs and small plates off the tables and tossing empty cups into the nearby trash can— and Steve followed suit.
Your mind almost immediately traveled to thinking about tomorrow, already going through and planning out what the day would look like— Oliver’s soccer game was in the morning and then you’d be back here for the rest of the day with Olly taking his spot in his favorite booth and proceeding to work on homework and then playing games, and you’d be at the cash register or in the kitchen working half of the day with Kyle, another one of your employees, and then the other half with Jude. You were then reminded that you would need to check in with her in the morning about her brother and see if she’d even be able to come in tomorrow. 
Your never-ending thoughts should’ve been taking a break for at least an hour or two, it was late and you were exhausted. But, whenever you were here closing up for the night, it was hard not to think about everything that could technically be deemed as “morning problems for tomorrow.” The relief you’d always feel about one day going really well would oh so quickly be replaced with the stressed need to make sure that the next day also went well, which made it completely impossible to not think about it. 
You weren’t sure how long things had been quiet, but when you heard Steve break the silence and softly say, “You okay?” you became aware of how long it had been since either of you had said something. 
“Oh, sorry, yeah, I’m just thinking a lot, I guess. Running through a million things at once,” You told him as you cleared one of the last tables, grabbing the mug full of a half-drunken latte and crumb-filled plate. 
“Okay, yeah, that’s what I thought. You kinda get this certain look on your face when you’re thinking really hard.”
You let out a laugh. “Does it resemble a deer in headlights? Because Eddie’s told me that one before.”
Steve coughed, which you knew was him just trying to hold back his laugh, and you playfully rolled your eyes at him as he spoke. “I feel bad saying yes, but yeah he’s right.”
“Just so you know, you also have a very uncute serious face.”
“I didn’t say yours wasn’t cute.”
You weren’t entirely sure what felt more unexpected; Steve’s words or how immediately affected you felt by them. Any quip or teasing joke you had on the tip of your tongue vanished in a matter of seconds, and your mind effectively became a flustered pile of mush; almost embarrassingly so. 
You were glad that Steve couldn’t see you right then, and you were especially glad that you two were on completely opposite sides of the shop at that moment— you putting the dirty mug and plate in the sink, and him clearing off the final table and tossing a coffee cup and random wrapper in the trash— because that distance meant that there was no way that you could read too heavily into what he just said, and he couldn’t pick up on how awkward and confused you immediately felt because of it.
A forced laugh fell from your lips, and you hoped to God and the universe and whatever else was out there that it didn’t sound completely fake. 
You walked over to the front window, where the makeshift stage area was, and grabbed the mic stand and wooden stool and Steve grabbed the two now unplugged speakers and followed you to the storage closet in the back. Once all of that was put away, you would just need to prep the cookie dough for tomorrow, and then the night would be done. 
“How are your baking skills, Harrington?” You asked him. You met his eyes for the first time in the past few minutes, it felt easier to do so now since your mind was back to only thinking about work.
“I’ve never baked anything before, but I’m good at following instructions.”
You smiled at that answer and it was what led you both to the kitchen. After washing your hands, you grabbed two metal bowls and the ingredients that would be needed for the cookies. And Steve was telling the truth, he was good at following instructions— you did the dough for the chocolate chip cookies, and you told him what to do for the sugar ones since they were a little bit easier, and it was all finished faster than you had expected. You put some plastic wrap over both bowls before placing them in the fridge.
“Thanks for all of the help tonight,” You told him. You both were now washing your hands at the sink that was full of the dishes that were the actual final thing you’d have to do before leaving. “If you’re ever in dire need of a part-time job, you’re hired.”
“Is the employee discount as good as the friend discount?” Steve asked as you turned off the water. He ripped off a paper towel and handed it to you and then grabbed one for himself. 
“It’s twenty percent.”
“I think I’ll just stick to being your friend then.”
That time you did entirely read into his words, as playful as they were. Just friends. That was exactly what you wanted and needed from him. You weren’t in the right headspace to consider being anything else with him, and you weren’t sure you ever would be. 
And besides, you liked being friends with him. It had been completely unexpected, but you liked talking to him, and you liked hanging out with him during Oliver and Madeline’s playdates that now felt like they were playdates for you both too, and you liked watching movies on the phone with him some nights before you went to bed— just last night you’d watched the first Tobey Maguire Spider-Man movie, as per Steve’s request. 
You were perfectly okay with being just friends with Steve, and as you continuously told Olly, it was the only thing that you two would ever be.  
You looked at him right then and he almost immediately met your gaze. 
“I don’t know how I’m just now noticing this, but you got some flour on your forehead,” You told him. Before he could say anything, you stepped closer to him and reached up to brush the white substance away with the damp paper towel in your hand. 
He gave you a soft look and there was a small smile on his face. “Thanks.”
It was obvious what sequence of events should’ve happened next— you should’ve told him that you just needed to clean the dishes in the sink and then the night would officially be done, and he didn’t have to stay for that. You should’ve finally said a goodbye and see you tomorrow to him.
However, right then, neither of you moved, and instead this sudden close proximity and the look and smile on his face made you get hit with the abrupt feeling that you wanted something more to happen, something more than just a friendly goodbye that was maybe followed by a simple hug. 
It was an insane idea that contradicted everything you had just told yourself. But, deep down you knew that the reason why you felt the urge to kiss him right here in this moment was the same reason why you always used the same mug for him every time he came here, and why you refused to admit it out loud. And right then, you still refused to dissect exactly what that all meant and what it would come to mean in the long run. 
Just for a second, you didn’t want to think about anything. You wanted to turn your brain off and simply focus on this moment that somehow felt so fucking right.  
And maybe Steve could read how much you wanted this to happen through the enamored look that you were certain was written all over your face, and that was why he let his hand come up to meet your cheek and why he leaned in closer, which made your eyes fall shut in anticipation. 
There was such a huge part of you that wanted this to happen, that felt as if you needed it to because maybe it had always been inevitable.
However, it didn’t take long for the existential dread to creep into your mind and prick right at the forefront of it. The reminders of why you’d been so scared of something like this happening with anyone for the past three years hit you like a freight train. Once you thought about all of that, you couldn’t force yourself to think or not think about anything else. Your mind was now on Oliver’s dad and what that entire situation with him changed for you— how it made you think about and see everything involving love so differently. 
And it was that painful reminder of what you were now terrified of that made you pull away from Steve and turn your head at the last second.
“I… I’m sorry.” 
Your gaze was fixed on the floor because you couldn’t bear to see what look was written across Steve’s face right then. 
“It’s okay.” His voice was soft when he spoke, which somehow made you feel worse.
“It’s just…” You wanted to say something, but you couldn’t pull your thoughts together fast enough. Your mind was moving in a thousand different directions and you still couldn’t even muster up the courage to simply look at Steve right then.
“You don’t have to explain. It’s okay, really,” He assured you again and you felt like he was being way too nice to you when you felt like the shittiest person.
“No, I wanna explain…” You told him, finally meeting his eyes. It was hard to read what he was thinking or feeling right then. “It’s just… I can’t– I don’t know.” You shook your head at yourself for being at such a loss for words at that moment. “I’m really sorry.” 
“No, don’t be sorry. It’s okay. Let’s just pretend this never happened,” He stepped away from you then, and you let him, deciding not to say anything else— you could no longer trust your voice, anyway. “I’ll see you tomorrow morning for the soccer game.”
You nodded quickly because you knew that there was nothing else to do. “Mhm, yup, yeah, see you tomorrow.”
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
Oliver gave you a look that he knew you wouldn’t be able to deny— there were puppy dog eyes and a pout that actually made your heart hurt. He was good. And you were weak.
“Okay, you can finish this episode, but then you’re starting your homework, bud.” 
He smiled and leaned back into the couch, turning his attention back to the cartoon that was playing on the television in the living room. “Thank you.” 
“You’re welcome,” You told him. You were completely okay with giving Olly some time to relax after school before starting his homework, but somehow you were almost always convinced by him to turn the thirty minutes into an hour— and maybe you shouldn’t have been surprised that this Wednesday afternoon was no different. 
It was also, overall, a surprisingly calm afternoon. There weren’t a thousand tasks on your plate right then; the calls you had to make and orders you had to place were already done. You had been at the coffee shop the entire morning and some of the afternoon before you had to pick Olly up from school, and Jude and Kyle would be closing for the night. Essentially, you would be free for the rest of the evening and night.
Instead of attempting to find anything to stress about at that moment, you were sitting on the small loveseat in the living room with your laptop balancing on the arm of the chair as you scrolled through the pictures taken during the open mic night.
Having a photographer for the night had been Steve’s suggestion, and it made sense coming from him given that he was in marketing, and he said that posting some on social media would be a good way to promote the event if and when you decided to do it again. You also thought it could be a nice idea to frame some and hang them up in the coffee shop. 
For most of the night, you’d forgotten that there had been a photographer there because of how discreet Shelby had been the entire time. But now you were looking at the edited pictures she emailed you earlier that morning of everything she’d taken barely a week ago, and you were already blown away even though you’d only looked at the first ten so far. 
There were a bunch of shots of people sitting at tables and booths happily enjoying their drinks and food, and there were also some of the people who decided to go up and perform. As you clicked through each of the photos and made mental notes of which ones you’d maybe want to post or hang up, you abruptly stopped at one of you and Steve. 
It shouldn’t have been that surprising to see a photo of you and him, you had been with each other during most of the night, but it still genuinely startled you to see such a candid moment of the two of you.
You were standing on one side of the counter and Steve was on the other— that was the only part of the photo that didn’t surprise you. You couldn’t tell just from that single shot what you two had been talking about in that moment, but it looked like whatever the conversation was about was a good one. There was a wide and elated smile on your face that reached your eyes, which were staring right into Steve’s, and an adoring look was written so clearly across his face along with a small smile. 
It looked like you two were dating; like you were newlyweds, even— if it were strangers in this photo, you would’ve easily thought either of those things. It looked like a picture of two people in love, so completely and utterly in love with each other. 
And it especially looked so goddamn obvious. 
Before even seeing this picture, it was clear to you that you felt something for him— what other reason would have made you almost kiss him that night? But, you didn’t realize just how deeply you felt, and you had forced yourself not to think about any of that over the last few days. You hoped that if you avoided and didn’t think about it, it would all just eventually go away. However, now that it was staring you right in the face, it suddenly became way too hard to deny everything or push it away or even pretend that you hadn’t just seen that picture. 
You were hit so abruptly with the truth that you couldn’t not finally admit it to yourself. You always gave him the same mug when he came to the coffee shop because you liked him. You wanted so badly to kiss him that night because you liked him. Fuck.
You quickly realized that what you saw in that photo was what Oliver and Madeline saw all of the time, and now it made complete sense why they were trying to push you and Steve into each other’s arms. Although you and him were apparently oblivious, they saw how happy you two were with each other. 
Eddie was right.
Your once calmed mind was now back to running a million miles a minute, and it became fully submerged with thoughts of Steve and how you felt about him and the almost kiss that you tried your hardest to forget ever even happened. You felt the overwhelming urge to cry the longer you looked at the photo, but you still couldn’t help but keep staring at it. 
You stood up from the loveseat and took a brief look at Olly before you walked out of the living room, he was laughing at the show on the TV. You went into the kitchen, setting your laptop down on the table and pulling your phone out of where it was in the pocket of the sweatpants you were wearing. You called the only person that you wanted to talk to at that moment, and you hoped that he wasn’t busy even though it was barely noon in California right then. 
When Eddie answered with a happy “Hello” on the fourth ring, you immediately said, “You were right.”
“Right about what?”
You bypassed his question for the moment. “I’m gonna send you a picture and just tell me what you… See in it. What you notice about it.” 
“That sounds very cryptic, but I’m intrigued,” He said and if it were any other moment, you probably would’ve cracked a smile at Eddie’s comment, but you felt way too stressed to do so.  
You texted him the photo of you and Steve through your laptop and when it said “Delivered” after a few seconds, you waited for whatever Eddie had to say about it. He’d be the one to tell you if you were crazy and overthinking things with the picture or not. 
It was quiet for barely thirty seconds before he said something. “Woah. Shit.”
You were mindlessly pacing back and forth from the table to the sink as you held the phone to your ear. “Can I get a full sentence, please?”
“I knew that you liked him, but I didn’t know you were in love with him.”
That was not at all the response you were expecting to hear from him. 
“What? You didn’t— I don’t—” You shook your head and took a breath. “Before seeing that picture, what could’ve possibly made you think that I liked him?”
“From the moment you told me that you and him were finally friends, there was just something about the way you talked about him. And then as you guys got closer and you talked about him more, it just seemed pretty obvious.”
Once again, Eddie said something that was entirely unexpected. It was hard to imagine it— you walking around with a crush that was apparently obvious to everyone but you— but you now knew it was true. “Why didn’t you ever say anything? You never called me out about it.”
“I figured you’d just tell me when you wanted to or when you decided to do something about the crush,” He answered, and that was such a nonchalant and Eddie kind of response that it didn’t surprise you in the slightest bit. “Is this your way of finally telling me?”
“No,” Was your immediate answer. In a way, it felt like a reflex or second nature to deny how you were feeling. “I’m not even sure if I actually have feelings for him.”
Your life would’ve been so much easier if that wasn’t a complete lie. 
Eddie immediately laughed at your words and when you didn’t join in, he stopped. “Oh, you’re being serious. I thought you were joking.”
“It’s just…” You had absolutely no idea how to finish your statement. You sighed and finally sat down at the kitchen table. “I’m really, really confused and scared, Eddie.”
Before he could say anything in response to that, you closed your eyes and said your next words. “Me and him almost kissed.” 
“Woah, what the hell? When?”
“It was last week at the open mic night. He stayed and helped me clean up because Jude had to leave early. We were washing our hands after making cookie dough and somehow we were about to kiss, but I pulled away at the last second and then he left. And we’ve been pretending like none of that happened ever since.”
It actually hadn’t been so hard to force things to be normal and completely okay between you two. Neither you nor Steve brought up what happened, just like you both agreed on, and in a way, it was easy to pretend as if the moment never happened in the first place— technically, nothing actually did happen, anyway. 
“Why did you pull away?”
“It was because of a mix of a bunch of things that are all basically the same thing,” You said and then let out a sigh. “I never thought that I’d want to be with someone again; like them or love them or whatever else. And I honestly didn’t think I’d be able to feel anything even remotely equivalent to love ever again because of the shitstorm my marriage became. And I do like Steve and I do feel all of those things that I didn’t think I ever would again, but I still don’t know if I'll ever be ready for something… More. Something real again because of everything that happened with…” You trailed off; you didn’t have to say his name for Eddie to know exactly who you were talking about. 
“Fuck that guy,” Eddie said with a huff. “I swear if I ever meet him, I’m gonna beat his ass.”
The conviction in his tone made you smile. “Thank you.”
“I do think that you can trust Steve, though. He’s one of the good ones. If this fucking picture says anything, it’s that he definitely feels the same way as you. And if it says anything else, it’s that he wouldn’t even think about fucking things up.”
It was hard not to smile at Eddie’s words. “You can see all of that in this photo?”
“You know the saying. A picture’s worth a thousand words or some shit,” He told you, and you could practically hear the shrug in his voice, which made you laugh for a second before you thought about something. 
“What if I’m the one that’ll mess everything up?” You asked him and then your mind traveled back to that night— you basically running away from everything, and Steve accepting that and walking away from it all too. Why would he want to try again with you? “Actually, never mind, I think I already did.”
“No, you didn’t,” Eddie reassured you, and for once it was hard to believe his words. “When are you gonna see him again?”
You thought for a second. “A little bit on Friday because we both have to volunteer at the Winter Carnival thing, but I doubt I’ll be able to have an actual conversation with him there. But, I’ll see him Saturday for the last soccer game and then later that night because we’re gonna take the kids to the carnival.”
“Okay, be honest with him there.”
“You make doing that sound so easy, Munson.”
“I just want you to be happy. You deserve to be happy— especially after all of the shit you went through with Olly’s dad. And it’s pretty clear that a lot of that happiness does come from Steve,” Eddie told you and for the first time, you didn’t have the urge to deny those words. “If you’re honest with him and he’s understanding and likes you too much to let you go, then everything works out and that’s great. Or, if you’re honest and it turns out that he thinks you did mess everything up too much and doesn’t wanna be with you, then fuck Harrington too and I’ll also beat his ass.” 
“For once, I actually believe that you did have a “bad boy” phase.”
“I told you. I used to be such a badass,” He said and you could hear the smile in his voice. “But, seriously, just know that I’ll be there for you no matter what scenario happens, so don’t worry about which one does. Also, just know that if, when I see you next week for Christmas, you haven’t said anything to him and there’s been no resolution to this situation yet, I will only let Oliver stay with me. You can find a hotel somewhere.”
“I promise I’ll say something,” You told him, and it truly didn’t feel like you were lying, and Eddie could tell that too.
When the call ended moments later and you placed your phone down next to your laptop, you looked at the picture again. 
You no longer felt startled seeing you and Steve like this— so smitten and happy. It made you feel content, at ease even. You felt yourself smile a little, and it was like you were a little kid with a crush all over again; which, technically, had been the case for the last month, but now you were aware of it and it felt weirdly good.
You realized then that it was a mistake pulling away from Steve that night. A big mistake that you sincerely hoped you could recover from because you no longer wanted to run away. And you hoped Eddie was right in saying that it actually wasn’t too late and you didn’t completely mess everything up. 
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
There hadn’t been a right moment all night. Or maybe you were just getting too into your head about everything. 
In the handful of days leading up to the Winter Carnival, it was hard to keep your mind off of Steve. Instead of beginning to second guess yourself and becoming unsure of everything— like you expected to happen since feeling like this again was so foreign to you— it all only became more and more certain. Your mind was the clearest it had been in such a long time; it was almost as if once you decided to no longer avoid how you felt, the rest just seemed to fall into place.
However, when Saturday night finally came around and you met up with Steve in the grassy parking lot of the large field where the carnival was happening, your focus was solely on Oliver and Madeline. Seeing how happy and content they were going on the few rides that were set up and playing the games, made it easy to forget what you needed to do. And it also made a part of you not want to do it— not want to change things; potentially for the worse if Steve actually didn’t feel the same way or no longer wanted anything to happen. But then you’d think about that picture and what Eddie said, and you knew that you had to find that moment to finally be honest, no matter what the outcome would be.
But still, no moment had been the right one. Not the moment where there was a brief lull of silence between you and Steve when Olly and Maddie were intensely focused on playing whack-a-mole, and not the moment where you and Steve quietly watched from the sidelines as they went on the train ride that just went round and round in a wide circle for a few minutes. And not even now when the night had finally come to its end and you both were about to drive away and leave.
The kids were fast asleep in their car seats and you and Steve lingered by the front of your cars. He had already said his goodnight to you and you reluctantly said the same, and you knew that he was about to turn and step inside his car— you could tell by the small smile he gave you— so you had to finally say something 
“Wait, um, before you go. I wanted to say…” You trailed off for a second and then you were speaking before you even realized what you were saying. “Do you want to go on a date sometime?”
Right as the question left your lips, you felt like an idiot. That was not what you were supposed to say; at least, not first. For a moment, Steve only looked at you, confused. Your question lingered harshly in the cold Winter air and you were about to take it back and start from the beginning, the actual beginning, but Steve finally said something.
“A date? Like, a real date?” He asked after what felt like the longest stretch of silence that you thought you’d ever experienced, and when you only nodded in response, because you were too nervous to say anything more right then, he said, “What’s changed since the open mic night? After that, I was pretty sure that you didn’t feel anything for me.” 
“I’m sorry. I know this sounds like it’s coming entirely out of nowhere. I had this whole long thing planned to say, and I messed up and started at the end instead of the beginning because I’m an idiot,” You sighed and then pulled your phone out of your coat pocket. “Can I send you something? It’s one of the pictures from that night that the photographer took.”
If Steve didn’t already think that this entire moment was insane, he probably did now, but he still said, “Okay.”
You sent him the picture that had now been sitting in your camera roll since Wednesday and then tucked your phone back into your pocket, eyes back on Steve and waiting for his reaction. 
“Oh,” Was the first thing that came out of his mouth. Other than the clear surprise, it was hard to read his expression right then. “Oh, wow.”
“That was probably my exact reaction when I saw it too,” You said, letting out a small laugh that felt entirely too awkward, but you pushed past it. “Okay, now here’s the very long-winded speech that I’ve been kinda rehearsing in my head for the past few days and I hope I don’t mess it up this time.” You took a breath and didn’t let your gaze break from his. “I like you, Steve. A lot. That picture kind of says it all, and it gave me the much-needed push to stop being so oblivious toward everything. The reason that I pulled away that night wasn’t because I don’t feel anything for you, it was because I do feel everything for you— and that’s terrifying as hell. Because you already know about everything that happened between me and Oliver’s dad, and it was one of the hardest things I ever had to go through. I loved him and he hurt me and pretty much ruined the entire way I viewed love and relationships. I never thought that I would want to date again, and I honestly wanted to just avoid it entirely, but now here you are.”
You took a breath, probably your first one in the past minute and a half. “And although doing this right now still does kinda scare the crap out of me, it’s an okay kind of scary— if that makes sense. The thought of finally starting over and starting something with you doesn’t feel as terrifying as I thought it would. Instead, it feels really exciting. And I hope that me running away that night didn’t completely mess things up between us before they really even got the chance to start.”
As your final words left your lips, you finally pulled your eyes away from Steve’s. 
He was quiet for what felt like forever, but you knew that he was just processing everything you said, which was a lot, and the overall length felt equivalent to a speech that you had to give in high school during your History class. That had been such a nerve-wracking moment, and you remembered nearly throwing up once you were finished speaking and sitting back at your desk— this time also felt sort of similar to that. But, in this moment, it also felt like the biggest weight was lifted off of your shoulders, so you didn’t regret your words at all. 
The longer you waited for Steve to say something, anything, the more you got the urge to tell him that it was okay if he wanted to reject you— the prolonging silence made you feel like that would be the inevitable thing to happen right then. It wouldn’t be the outcome you wanted, and you’d leave this makeshift parking lot partially devastated, but also with your head held high, at least, because you had been honest and you tried.
The words were about to leave your lips— the same ones he said to you that night; “It’s okay”— but then he smiled at you, a soft smile that managed to too easily warm you up from the inside out, and then he shook his head. “You didn’t ruin everything.”
“Really?” 
“Really,” He said, and it was that reassurance that made you inwardly let out a breath. “I completely understand why you’ve been scared— a part of me is really scared too because of everything that happened last year. There was barely any sort of a relationship left between me and Maddie’s mom before she left, but that didn’t really make going through that any easier. I trusted her and a part of me loved her, and in the beginning, I hoped that she would come back— maybe more for Maddie’s sake than mine. Once I fully accepted that she wasn’t, and deep down I think I always knew that, I never thought that I’d fall for someone else so soon. But, it was almost too easy to fall for you— and I think it started happening before I could even realize it was happening. And like you said, that picture pretty much says it all. So, yes to the date. Definitely yes.”
It was hard not to smile at his final words. It made you want to kiss him, but that felt like it was something that should be saved for a different moment entirely. 
You stepped closer to him and pushed yourself up on your toes, letting your arms loop around his neck and hugging him instead. It seemed almost instinctual how quickly Steve’s arms came up to circle your waist. 
You two had hugged a few times before, usually they were quick and in lieu of a “Goodbye” or “See you later,” and they were typically never anything more or less than a side hug. But, this one was completely different, it definitely didn’t say goodbye or see you later. Instead, it somehow managed to say a thousand other things. 
How tightly Steve held you, told you that he wouldn’t even think about hurting you or breaking your heart, and it also let you know that Eddie was right about you being able to trust Steve completely. 
And how your face was buried in Steve’s neck, fully taking in his scent, told him that he didn’t need to be scared of how quickly he was falling for you, the past wouldn’t repeat itself. 
Both of you had your shitty pasts, that in some ways you both were still recovering from, but it didn’t mean that you had to disregard or push aside what this was— these strong feelings you two had. Neither of you would say it out loud just yet, but it was clear that you loved each other. 
It was way too soon to put those three words out there, but they didn’t have to be said for both of you to know that they already existed so prominently between you two. The long embrace managed to say it all.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
Things were left fairly open-ended that Saturday night because it was quickly discovered that your schedules were way too busy with work and holiday plans to do something as soon as you both wanted to. And then, after a few texts and a late-night FaceTime call, it was decided that you’d see each other and plan things out when you and Oliver got back on the twenty-seventh from spending Christmas in California. 
You wanted so badly to kiss him when you saw him for the first time after a week of nothing but texts and sporadic phone calls— and that feeling only increased tenfold when you noticed the bouquet of daisies in his hand. But you couldn’t kiss him in a coffee shop full of people, so you settled for a hug instead, where he very subtly whispered in your ear how badly he also wanted to kiss you at that moment.
He and Madeline stayed for most of that afternoon. She played board games in a booth with Oliver, and Steve helped you out with little tasks you had to do since, on that day, it was just you working in the coffee shop. It was hours full of lingering touches— his hand brushing against your waist or hip at the most random of moments, and you standing almost flush next to him and your hands continuously grazing his as you showed him how to work the coffee machine— and long looks that made your brain feel fuzzy.
Both of you were standing in the back kitchen area when one of his hands found yours after you finished putting a sheet of cookies in the oven. “I already have an idea for what I want us to do for our date.”
You stepped a little closer to him and found his other hand to intertwine it with yours. “Since I asked you on the date, I think that I should be the one to plan it.”
“You can plan the second one,” He told you and it was hard not to smile at that. “So, when’s the next night you’re free?”
“New Year’s Eve, actually. We’re gonna be closed here then, and New Year’s Day too.”
Steve nodded. “Okay, perfect.”
Now that night had finally rolled around, and in comparison to the anticipation you’d been feeling for the last few days about it, a good kind of nervousness was coursing through your body as you hurried down the stairs when the doorbell rang at seven o’clock.
Oliver was already in the living room playing Connect Four with your next door neighbor, Natalie, who was almost always willing to babysit him for you. And she didn’t even seem to mind doing it tonight, even though it was New Year’s Eve, because she said that it would get her out of going to this party with her parents at her dad’s job. You still promised to pay her double the amount you usually gave her. 
“I left some money to order a pizza,” You told Natalie as you quickly put your shoes on, a pair of boots that stopped just below your knee and nicely complimented the short length of the dress you were wearing, and then you grabbed your coat and purse. “Call or text me if anything happens or you need something, you know the usual.”
“Got it,” She responded with a quick nod as she made her next move in the game. 
“I’ll see you later, Olly. Are you still gonna try and stay up until midnight?”
Oliver smiled up at you and nodded. “Yup.” 
“Good luck,” You said, smiling back at him.
You opened the front door and were immediately met with the sight of Steve standing at your doorstep, wearing a nice pair of black jeans and a coat over his long-sleeved white button-up shirt. 
You closed and locked the door behind you before turning to look at him again, a small smile on your face. “Hi.”
“Hi,” He told you and then his gaze traveled down your body for a brief second before meeting your eyes again. “You look really great.”  
His words let you know that you definitely made the right decision about pulling out the red strapless dress that had been sitting in your closet for the past year. It had no real reason to come out until now; for a date with someone that you really liked. And even after a year, it still looked great on you, hugged your body in all the right places, and made you feel really good. This was the first time in a long time that you were out of your typical “mom attire,” simple jeans and a plain t-shirt that was typically covered by an apron, and you wanted to look extra nice tonight; even if you and Steve wouldn’t be doing something fancy or extravagant.  
“Thank you,” You responded, smiling wider at him. “I don’t know what we’re doing, but as long as it’s not a hike or paintball, I think I should be fine.”
“Don’t worry, I think high-intensity things like that are usually saved for third dates,” He said playfully. 
“Oh, yeah, that’s so true,” You said, matching his tone and nodding. “But, if you force me to go on a hike for our third date, I’ll never go out with you again.”
“Okay, got it. Is paintball still on the table, though?”
“Sure.”  
“Great, so I won’t have to cancel our reservation in three weeks,” He responded, and the over-dramatic sigh in relief he let out made you laugh a bit.
It was almost embarrassing how easily Steve made you feel like you were back in middle school and crushing on the boy in your Math class. You hoped Josh Miller was doing well wherever he currently was because right then, as Steve reached out his hand and you slipped yours into his open palm, you knew for a fact that you were.
“Do I finally get to find out what we’re doing tonight?” You asked once you were settled in the passenger seat of his car.
Steve shook his head. “You’ll see once we get there.”
You sighed but still nodded. “The anticipation is killing me, just so you know.”
“Please don’t die before I get to show you everything.” 
That got a smile from you. “I’ll try my hardest not to.”
The drive was only about fifteen minutes— with you controlling the radio the entire time, and Steve’s hand that wasn’t on the steering wheel resting on your exposed thigh, and his thumb lightly stroking the bare skin throughout most of the ride. It was an action that essentially made your brain short circuit and was the reason why you had accidentally stopped on a station playing country music for longer than you intended. Your brain only started working again when the car was parked and you noticed that you were in his driveway.  
You looked at him, a small smile playing on your lips. “Usually, you bring the person back to your house at the end of the date, not the beginning, Harrington. How long has it been since the last time you did this?”
“Ha ha,” He said with a playful roll of his eyes at your sarcastic question. “The date is actually happening here, so that rule doesn’t really apply to this situation.”
“Okay, fair,” You responded, nodding. Your mind was already starting to run through the possibilities of what he had set up for you in his house.
“I’ll be right back, I just need to check something really quick first,” He told you and you only nodded again. 
Steve was barely gone for five minutes before he was opening the passenger door for you and helping you step out of the car. 
“Can I cover your eyes?”
“You’re actually making me really nervous now, but I’ll allow it,” You answered and he stepped behind you, covering your eyes with his hands.
“I think I might be more nervous than you,” He whispered, lips brushing your ear, which sent something equivalent to a shiver down your spine and you were glad that you had your coat on because it hid your goosebumps.
“Impossible,” You told him. “Is this a bad time to tell you that I hate surprises?”
“Yes, because now I don’t believe you.”
He was right to not believe you because that was technically a lie, but that didn’t mean that you weren’t still nervous about what this surprise would be. 
You expected him to guide you up the front steps of his house, but instead, you were led a different way, to the backyard. At some point, Steve stopped you both, but he still kept covering your eyes as he began talking. 
“Okay, so the initial idea I had was that we go to a drive-in movie theater because I feel like movies are kind of our thing at this point, and going to just a normal theater would be boring. But, the closest drive-in is over an hour away, and there was one specific movie I wanted us to watch anyway, so I decided to just set something up here.”
He pulled his hands away then and you opened your eyes. The first thing you saw was 
the large blanket set up in the middle of the backyard, there were a bunch of pillows on it along with a few folded up blankets and you noticed the plastic bowl full of candy and bucket of popcorn too. You then saw the projector screen that was set up a few feet in front of the blanket and the movie that was already queued up on it. Since it was currently paused, you could see the name in the top left corner— The Parent Trap. Everything was perfect, and you were about to tell Steve exactly that, but he started talking again before you could. 
“And I know you’re dressed up really nice right now, which means that you were probably expecting us to do something fancy, so I’m sorry if this is kind of a disappointment. But, I promise next time I’ll take you to the fanciest restaurant ever and—”
You cut off his rambling by turning to him and kissing his cheek. “This is the most thoughtful thing I think anyone has ever done for me. I love this.”
He smiled and you could see the happy relief washing over his face. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” You nodded, smiling back at him.
You pulled off your coat and slipped off your shoes and then grabbed one of the folded blankets to wrap around yourself before sitting down. 
“Maddie helped with a lot of the setup. She told me to add more pillows and blankets so that everything could feel really cozy,” Steve told you and you nodded at that, saying a quick, “She was very right.” “Also, I wasn’t sure what type of candy was your favorite, so I got a little bit of everything.” 
You grabbed the first stray bag of Skittles that you were able to find in the plastic bowl. “These are probably my favorite, but I do kinda like everything.”
“Okay, good to know for next time,” He said and there was something about the mention of “next time” that made your heart happily feel as if it was about to burst in your chest. 
Steve walked over to where the projector and his laptop were set up on his patio table so that he could start the movie. When he sat down right next to you, you gave him some of your blanket and he didn’t hesitate to wrap an arm around you as the opening credits and song started playing. 
The cold got to you quicker than you expected it to. You shifted a bit so that your legs were draped over Steve’s lap, you were almost sitting in his lap with how close you were. He wrapped his arms around you and pressed a soft kiss to your forehead, letting his warmth and the blanket that was draped over you both engulf you completely. But when the blanket and his own body heat still weren’t enough to keep you warm, he went inside and grabbed a hoodie for you to wear. 
Not even halfway through the movie, you could feel his gaze solely on you; maybe it was to make sure that you were comfortable, which you were, or maybe it was to make sure that you were enjoying everything, which you also were. 
You looked at him, an amused smile on your face. “You should be watching the movie, not me.”
For a moment, he didn’t say anything— just simply kept looking at you, admiring you— until he finally did say something. “I know that this is completely breaking first date etiquette and another one of the “rules,” but I really wanna kiss you right now.”
You were nodding before the final words even managed to leave his lips. “Do it.” 
One of his hands came up to cup your cheek and he simply stared at you for a second before tilting your head up a bit and leaning in to softly slot his lips against yours. It was slow at first, like you both really wanted to savor this moment since it was the first time this was ever happening. 
Pushing yourself impossibly closer to him, your mouths moved against each other so seamlessly, almost as if this wasn’t the first time this was happening between you two— there was absolutely no confusion or uncertainty laced within this intimate moment. 
Steve pulled away slowly too, which elicited a soft and quiet whine from you. A sound that managed to oh so easily flip the switch for the both of you. From there, things became much more desperate and needy, as if you were two teenagers who just discovered what making out was. Your mouth hungrily found his that second time and his hand moved from your face and went down to grip your hip. 
For the most part, the movie became long forgotten, but there were some moments where you would abruptly pull away from Steve and claim that you two were “missing the good part of the movie,” and you’d force your attention back to that. It would always only be for a moment though, because before you knew it, you were back to looking at Steve and smiling at him and kissing his cheek or jaw or nose before eagerly finding his lips. 
Neither of you noticed when the credits started rolling. Your heads were against one of the pillows and legs were tangled beneath the two blankets that were over you both. One of your hands found home in the hair at the nape of Steve’s neck, and one of his hands had snaked underneath the hoodie and was squeezing your waist. 
You pulled back from the kiss, mainly to catch your breath, and Steve’s mouth immediately began attacking your jaw and then neck. You had to bite your lip for a second to keep from letting out any noise. “We’re probably giving your neighbors a very good show right now.” 
You felt Steve let out a laugh against your skin. “It’s a good thing that there are old married couples on both sides, so they’re all probably in bed asleep by now.”
You hummed in response. “Mm, that’s very good to know.”
You were about to pull back a bit so that you could then lean in and kiss him again, but then you managed to realize something and you turned your head toward the projector screen. “The movie’s over.”
“Oh,” Steve looked at the final credit screen that the movie ended on. “Good thing we’ve seen it before because I don’t think we watched any of it tonight.” 
You smiled at him. “Your face made it really hard to pay attention to the movie. I think we’ll need to go back to watching stuff on the phone in order for us to actually watch a movie.” 
“Never gonna happen,” He said before pressing a kiss to your lips. “I don’t have my phone on me, but I think it’s probably almost ten. What time do I need to get you home?”
“Oliver luckily didn’t give me a curfew,” You jokingly answered, which made a soft laugh fall from Steve’s lips. “But, seriously, Natalie told me that she’s fine with staying at the house as long as I need. For some reason, she really likes sleeping in the guest room once Oliver’s in bed. Even though tonight he wants to try and stay up until midnight to watch the ball drop, so I don’t know when he’ll actually end up in bed.”
“Maddie’s trying to do the same thing at my parent’s house, but she’ll probably fall asleep before eleven, if she’s not already,” He said and that made you smile because you were pretty sure the same thing would happen with Oliver. Steve’s hand then found yours beneath the blanket and gave it a light squeeze. “So, we should…” 
“We should go inside,” You finished for him and quickly pressed a kiss to his nose before detangling yourself from him and standing up. “I can help you clean up all of this first if you want.”
“I’ll do it in the morning,” He said and you nodded at that as he stood up too.  
You didn’t mind leaving your shoes and coat outside for the time being, but you grabbed your phone from your purse so that you could check it and make sure that everything was going okay with Oliver. You immediately saw that Natalie texted you almost thirty minutes ago telling you that he fell asleep, which made you laugh a bit. You quickly texted something back to her and then placed your phone down on Steve’s kitchen island when you walked through the sliding doors that led from the backyard to the kitchen. 
Steve walked over to where you were leaning against the island. He slipped his hands underneath the hoodie of his that you were still wearing so that he could grab your hips, and your arms came up to lazily circle his neck. He was the one who initiated the kiss that time around.
How comfortable and okay you were right then and how completely comfortable you had been the entire night was something that slightly surprised you as much as it made you feel so fucking happy. It was hard not to recognize that this was the first time in a long time that you felt this way— and that should’ve made things feel at least a little scary; like they would’ve felt just a few weeks ago— but instead that realization gave you a small burst of confidence in that moment.
You pulled back a bit, eyes still shut and lips lightly brushing his. “Y’know, I really love that we’re already at your house.” 
“Yeah?” 
“Mhm,” You nodded, eyes opening and then you stepped away from him and slipped your hand into his. You started leading him toward the stairs and you wondered if it was entirely obvious that you were heading to his bedroom. You already knew where it was because you had accidentally found it the first time you and Oliver came over for a playdate— you had been looking for the bathroom and mistakenly chose the door on the left instead of the right. “It makes this part a lot easier.” 
“What’s this part?” He asked and you could practically hear the smirk in his voice.
You turned to him when you were in front of his closed door. You gave him a look that said everything— everything you wanted from him right then and everything you wanted to give him— before reaching up and softly kissing his cheek. 
It was dark when you both walked into his bedroom and Steve flicked on the small lamp that was sitting on his nightstand. You were lingering by the foot of the bed and he once again closed all of the space between you two, his hands found the hem of the hoodie and immediately pushed it up and off of you. He slowed down when his fingers found the zipper on the back of your dress. A questioning look that asked “Is this okay?” crossed his face, and you quickly nodded. Somehow the minor action sent an inadvertent shiver down your spine— Steve letting the red material fall to the floor and leaving you in just your strapless bra and underwear before softly pushing you down so that you were sitting on the bed. You started helping him unbutton his shirt so that he could push it off of his shoulders and let it hit the floor as well. 
Your hands then found his belt buckle, fumbling around with it and then proceeding to unbutton his pants and snake your right hand within them. Steve’s groan was loud and it sent a chill through your body as you touched him and felt him grow stiffer in his boxers due to all of your soft, teasing strokes. 
After just a moment, he reached for your hand, halting your movements, and then leaned down to kiss you, removing his pants in the process. Once he was left in just his navy blue boxers you maneuvered upward so that your head was hitting one of his pillows at the top of the bed and he settled on top of you between your now spread legs.
Steve’s lips brushed against your forehead and then cheek before he pulled back and simply looked at you. “You’re so fucking pretty.” 
You didn’t feel an ounce of nervousness under his gaze, which said and told you so much, and it actually felt like your heart was about to burst out of your chest. 
“You’re not too bad yourself,” You whispered, tilting your head upward a bit so that your lips could meet his in a quick kiss. 
When your bra was discarded on the floor somewhere along with your underwear, you found yourself begging for him. Soft “pleases” fell from your lips as he teased you— softly rubbing your nipple in small circles and only stroking your inner thighs with the most featherlight of touches, getting so close to where you wanted him most. And feeling his hard length, which was still covered by his boxers, pressing against you only made your want grow more. You knew for a fact that you were making the worst mess against his comforter because of how much you were dripping for him.  
“Steve,” You let out a soft sigh, eyes screwed shut. “I need you. Please.”
“Mhm, yeah, anything for you,” He said, moving away from you for a second. Your eyes opened and you immediately missed his warmth enveloping you completely. He was ridding himself of his boxers and then began rummaging around in his nightstand drawer for a condom. 
You were smiling at him when he settled back on top of you and he gave you a small smile back. 
“You sure this is okay?” He asked, and you could hear the sudden shyness take over his voice. 
“Yes, I promise. I want this. I want you,” You told him, nodding profusely. He needed that reassurance and you completely understood why. Your voice was soft as you said your next words. “You sure this is okay?”
He pressed the softest kiss against your forehead. “So much better than okay.” 
For some reason, those simple words made your heart flutter wildly in your chest. He looked down for a second, lining his cock up with your soaked entrance, and then his eyes met yours again as he slowly pushed himself inside of you. 
“Fuck,” You wanted so badly to shut your eyes, but you also didn’t want to break his gaze. 
There was so much shared in the dreamy and lust-filled look you two were holding. You were hit with the sudden need to never have this to end. Not just the sex, but simply being with Steve— talking, laughing, playfully arguing as you debated random shit that didn’t matter. You wanted all of that with him for as long as you could have it. 
It was too early to even truly entertain the potential of a forever with him, but it was something that could happen and it was hard not to let your mind wander for a bit. 
You could see it all, and so easily too— your lives blending and becoming so deeply intertwined. You didn’t expect yourself to fall so goddamn hard for him so quickly, but it felt nice feeling so entirely certain about it all. 
“What are you thinking about, honey?” Steve whispered, breaking through your thoughts and eyes still looking so deeply into yours. He was still moving slowly but was also hitting so deeply inside of you with every languid thrust that it elicited the softest whines and mewls from you. 
“Everything,” You told him honestly, but didn’t explain further because you were then shutting your eyes and letting your mind turn to mush. A particularly hard thrust had your back arching off the bed and a gasp falling from your lips. “Shit, yes, right there.”
“I think about everything with you all the time,” Steve said, lips finding yours and swallowing the loud moans you let out upon hearing his words— right then, that was the only way that you could verbalize how much you loved hearing him say that. He started moving quicker, losing control inside of you, which you didn’t mind in the slightest because it only made you wetter. “I want it all so badly.”
You could feel yourself nodding at him, it still felt way too hard to open your eyes. “Me too.”
Your walls squeezed harshly around his cock when one of his hands snaked down to find your clit, rubbing it in tight circles with his thumb and almost immediately pushing you so close to the edge. 
“You gonna come for me, honey?” Steve asked with a groan and when you only mumbled out a barely coherent “yes” and “please,” he started circling your clit quicker before saying, “Do it. Come for me.”
It hit you so fucking hard. You were moaning loudly, practically screaming, as stars flooded your vision and your body almost immediately felt as if it was floating. How tightly you were squeezing Steve’s cock as you came only spurred on his own release, forehead dropping against yours as he pushed as deep as he could inside of you and spilled into the condom. 
Your lips haphazardly found his in a slow kiss as you both came down from your highs and your breathing returned mostly to normal.  His weight crushed you in the most peaceful way possible before he was slipping out of you and then pulling your back flush against his chest. You didn’t mean to fall asleep, but with Steve’s arms around you in the most comforting way, you did almost immediately. 
When you woke up, it had barely been an hour and the only reason you knew that was because the TV was now on and the live New Year’s Eve special was playing. You got up to go to the bathroom and then slipped on Steve’s white button-up shirt, only buttoning a few of the buttons, before getting back in bed. 
“Hi,” You whispered, head settling against his chest and his arms immediately came up to circle around you. 
“Hey,” He whispered back and pressed a kiss to the top of your head. You draped your leg over his hips to push yourself even closer to him. “Ten minutes to midnight. Should I take you home after?”
“Yeah, that’s probably a good idea,” You answered softly. “I wish I could stay.”
“Me too,” Steve said as one of his hands started lightly rubbing up and down against the curve of your hip. “One day, though.”
You smiled at that, tilting your head up a bit and kissing his jaw. “I can’t wait for that.”
Years down the road you’d both think back to this moment. 
When you’re laying in bed together in the house that you two moved into just weeks earlier, something bigger that would better fit your growing family. Oliver and Madeline would be fast asleep in their rooms down the hall from yours and their newborn sister would only be a few feet away from you and Steve, finally asleep in her bassinet. 
You’d be the one to bring up this night— how it was both the start of something and the end of something else— and he’d smile at you immediately and start absentmindedly playing with the ring on your finger. How it had been the start of a relationship that neither of you truly saw coming and how it brought a slow but steady end to the fears that both of you had. 
Steve would softly say that even though he’d been a little scared to tell you that night, he had known then— as he was dropping you off at your house close to one in the morning and softly kissing you goodnight on your doorstep— that he wanted to be with you forever. And you’d tell him that you had felt the exact same way, that you even ended up dreaming about it all that night like a lovesick teenager. 
That would make him kiss you, slowly and tenderly; something that never failed to make your head feel dizzy. 
Before you and him fell asleep too, just for a few hours before Luna woke both of you up, you would tell Steve that you were glad that Oliver and Madeline asked to have a playdate during that oddly warm day in September four years ago because that simple thing changed everything between you two. Your eyes would already be shut as you sleepily whispered how much you loved him and he’d smile while telling you that he loved you too. He’d then laugh a bit and say that it was the sleep deprivation making you extra sentimental right then but he was completely okay with that. His soft and sweet words of, “I’m also so glad that those playdates changed everything,” would be the last thing you remember hearing before you fully fell asleep, and it put the softest smile on your face.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
let me know ur thoughts<333
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desperate-gay · 4 months
Note
How about a NNN (No nut november) fic with either Leah or Alexia where they made a bet and two weeks in regret it but R wants them to win and denies them but also still teases. they end up getting mocked by everyone because of their lack of concentration. you can decide the ending !
Needy November
Alexia Putellas x fem!reader
a/n: pretend i’m not two months late…
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“C’mon capi, join the bet. Ingrid and I are doing it!” Mapi exclaims, continuing to try and convince her captain to the challenge.
“For the last time Maria, no.” Alexia shakes her head and proceeds to pack up her kit bag. She found the whole month's dare stupid and meaningless, especially when it meant holding off one of her favorite things.
“Ah, I see. You’re too scared that you’re gonna lose. I bet you’d crumble and fail within an hour.” The tattooed girl smirks, egging on Alexia which seems to be working. Alexia is never one to lose a challenge, so hearing people say she’d fail, she’s going to prove them wrong.
“How much are we talking?”
“Bebe, I’m home!” Alexia’s voice echoes through the house, but once she notices the nicely lit candles and rose petals on the ground, she decides to quickly look for you.
Making her way around the home, she still has no clue as to where you are. She finally makes her way to the bedroom, and when she walks in, hands cover her eyes from behind which makes her jump but ease down when she smells the familiar scent of your perfume.
“Surprise.” You whisper in her ear, leaning up to reach. Removing your hands, you make your way in front of her and smooth out your outfit. Her eyes trail down her body and her mouth opens slightly in awe.
“What is all this?” She asks breathlessly, hands finding their way to your hips while yours loop around her neck and mess with her baby hairs.
“I thought I’d surprise you. I didn’t have anything to grade or check over today, so I came straight home and set this up. You and I have hardly had much time together since the season started, and I wanted to make time. So here we are.” Smiling, you lean in for a loving kiss. Alexia melts into your soft lips but pulls back way too soon for both of your liking.
“No no no no, I can’t.” The taller girl groans as she runs her hands down her face. She keeps them hovering over her eyes so she can’t see you in your outfit. If she keeps looking, she would pounce and have her way with you, but lose the bet.
Your hands grab her wrists and pull them away from her face, but her head tilts up towards the ceiling. “What is going on, baby? You’re really confusing me right now.” You nervously chuckle at her weird behavior.
“I made a bet with the girls.” She trails off, still avoiding your gaze.
“Oh no-”
“I can’t have any sex this month.”
“What!”
Alexia winces at your sudden rise of tone. “I know, I know. It was so stupid to accept. I should have just left.” She groans, still keeping her eyes off of you.
You let off a small huff and race through your thoughts. Technically, the team wouldn’t even know if she failed the challenge, she’d just have to lie. You grin to yourself and return your hands to her neck, rubbing up and down sensually. Alexia’s breath hitches when you press a few kisses on her jawline, knowing what you’re trying to do.
“Y’know, the girls don’t have to find out. We can have all the fun we want and still win the bet.” You whisper in her ear, attempting to help her give in. You pull back slightly and tug her earlobe between your teeth, making her eyes roll slightly in pleasure.
“No, that’s cheating which makes me a loser.” She suddenly takes a few steps back, shaking her head ferociously while pacing around the room.
“So you’re saying no to your half-naked girlfriend because you’re too stubborn to lose a bet that you got yourself into?” You question, quirking your eyebrow at her.
“Si.”
Her deadpan answer makes you scoff and groan at the same time. She probably didn’t even consider what she’d be taking away from you when she accepted the bet, so you’re going to try one last thing in hopes of changing her mind. You approach her and lightly run your fingertips down her chest and to her stomach, causing the Catalan to look anywhere but you.
“Ale, be serious for a second. You can pretend this stupid little game doesn’t exist and do whatever you want to me. You can bend and flip me into any position then fuck me-“
“La la la la! I can’t hear you!” Alexia covers her ears, shouting like a little kid and closing her eyes to end your temptations. Groaning loudly, you stomp into the bathroom to get your robe and calm down.
After a minute, the brunette peeks her eye open and sees you’re no longer in the room. She lets out a breath in relief but frowns when she takes in how much you did for her only for it to be ruined.
Walking over to the bathroom, she knocks lightly against the door. “Amor? Are you okay?”
She moves back when the door swings open, revealing you with your hair up in a messy bun and your body dressed in an oversized shirt with shorts. Her eyes follow your figure as you blow out all the candles, confusing her as to what your mood is. You can either be angry or just meh. Once you’re done, you walk back over to the taller girl and place a kiss on her cheek.
“I’m not mad, Ale. I guess it’s my fault for being in a relationship with a stubborn captain who can’t ever lose.”
“Hey!”
Three weeks in and Alexia has been miserable. Her body aches for yours, to touch you and to be touched. You on the other hand have been okay. Of course, you’re constantly craving Alexia, but you can still get off by yourself. It’s hard, but it’s one way to relieve yourself.
Alexia has been off the past week due to tweaking her knee, so she has to sit out for precautionary purposes. She still goes to training to see the girls and fulfill her captain duties, but today she decided to stay at home with you. It’s the weekend so you don’t have to worry about going to work.
You decided to take in your time off and enjoy yourself with a book in bed while Alexia busied herself in the living room, most likely watching football games. You’re embracing the silence of the room until the door creaks open and a body slams itself onto the bed.
The Catalan sighs, trying to get your attention but when you don’t pay her any mind, she sighs louder. You continue to flip through the pages of your book, purposely ignoring the girl’s advances. She crawls up to your body and places her head onto your stomach then trailing her hands onto your waist, just where your shirt rises and shows off your skin.
It starts as innocent as she rubs her hands up and down, massaging at your skin but soon turns more sinister when she places kisses below your belly button. Her fingers hook onto your shorts in an attempt to pull them down, but her advances are stopped when you slap at her hands.
“Amor.” She whines, looking up at you with your nose still stuck in your book. She huffs in annoyance and slides her body up, poking her head between the gap of your arms, now resting her head on your chest.
When you continue to pay her no attention, she begins to trail kisses across your jaw and down your neck. Her teeth start to sink into your skin right before you slam your book shut, making the girl jump in shock.
“Baby, I know you’re needy right now, but you need to stop.” You say sternly.
“Oh bebe, I know you want this just as much as I do. Let’s get naked, si?” She grins as her nose brushes along the underside of your jaw.
“Ah, no.” You push her off your body and onto the other side of the bed.
“C’mon, bebe. Don’t you want me fuck you with the stra-“
You quickly place a hand over her mouth and say, “You dug this hole, Ale. You gotta get yourself out of it. I’m not gonna give in just because you want it this time. You wanted to win so you’re going to win.”
Alexia buries her face into a pillow and lets out a few noises of aggression before getting up to head back into the living room. You shake your head in amusement and reopen your book, continuing from the spot you were interrupted by.
The Catalan shouts from another room, “I guess I’ll have to occupy myself because my girlfriend doesn’t love me!”
“Don’t you dare, Alexia Putellas Segura!”
It’s finally November 30th. Alexia is in the locker room, bouncing her leg up and down in anticipation of tonight. You’re both definitely going to be staying up until midnight to make up for the month’s time.
“Got somewhere to be, capi?” Patri asks, noticing the girl’s antsy behavior.
“Yeah, to her girlfriend so she can finally shag her tonight,” Mapi smirks when Alexia glares at her. “Don’t you think I know? Ingrid and I are both excited too, right bonita?” Ingrid rolls her eyes at her girlfriend who is waving her eyebrows up and down.
“It’s your fault I am even in this mess.” Alexia glares at the tattooed defender who in return holds up her hands in fake defense.
“You’re the one who agreed to take part in it, amiga. I didn’t force you.”
The two bicker back and forth until Ingrid interferes, stopping both of them much to the team’s dismay who find their arguing amusing. Ingrid rushes Mapi out the door to get home and rest as soon as possible from the rough training while Alexia decides to do the same.
It’s around 10 at night as she walks through the door. Just like a few weeks ago, there are flower petals on the ground and candles lit around the house, but now there is soft music playing and you standing in a new lingerie set with two flutes of champagne.
Alexia drops her bag onto the floor and quickly makes her way over to you, taking one glass out of your hand and into hers before wrapping her free arm around your back, pulling you into a steamy kiss. After a while, you both pull away to catch your breath with swollen red lips and blown-up eyes.
“Um, we still have two hours so I thought we could watch a movie for the time being. Can’t let you lose now.”
“That’s so long though.” Alexia whines but stops when you slam your lips against hers.
Pulling away you whisper, “Maybe we can make out during the movie, y’know, set the mood for the hours of stolen time we need to redeem?”
“Someone had a good night!” Lucy howls at the love-sick smile and glow that has been plastered on the captain’s face since she arrived at training.
“Mapi, pay up!”
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adventuringblind · 8 months
Text
Mr. Blue Sky
Charles Leclerc x Reader x Max Verstappen
Genre: Fluff
Request: Yes, I loved every second of this. Y'all are welcome to send me your own ideas :)
Summary: After Max gets cheated on, he can't stand being in the house where it happened. Reader and Charles take him in and show him he's still loved.
Warnings: cheating
Notes: No hate to Kelly. I just needed this as a plot point.
Fun fact: my mom calls Valentine’s Day ‘legislative love day’ and will only do any remotely related activities on the 15th because she has a point to prove.
Masterlist
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The sound of Charles' phone buzzing at an ungodly hour is what you woke up to. The room is still pitch black, and you can hardly make out Charles in the bed.
He rolls over and pucks up the phone. "It's Max." He states. Voice filled with the sleep from which he was dragged.
He answers the phone, and you curl up into him, hoping to listen in. "Max? Are you-"
You can hear faint mumbling and the occasional choked sob on the other end of the line. "Breathe, Max. I'm going to come get you. Can you stay on the phone with me?" Charles is throwing off the covers and looking for his car keys.
You look at Charles for some sort of answer. To which Charles pulls the phone away from his ear and kisses your head. "Kelly cheated. I'm going to go get him."
You nod your head in understanding. You clamber out of bed and see Charles off to the door.
Your grateful that Monte Carlo is a small city and that it doesn’t take long for him to come back. His body shouldering a drunk Max through the door.
Max is no coherent and reeks of alcohol. His eyes are puffy and his cheeks tear stained. His lips tremble as them mutter words neither of you can understand.
Your heart hearts for him. You and Charles had made an effort to be around the Dutch. You both actively became friends with him and found yourselves in each others company often.
And did you both end up falling for the same pair of blue eyes? Yes.
It was actually Charles who brought it up first. You’d never considered the idea of being with more then one person. Then you got to know Max and you found yourself considering more often then you’d admit.
Neither of you knew if Max would ever be into that and neither of you wanted to ask. The possibility of ruining what is currently a good friendship was not on the to-do list. Plus, he had Kelly and P.
You shake of your thoughts and help Charles get Max into the guest bed. You and him do your best at cleaning him up and making him comfortable despite the fact he is less then cooperative.
When you two are finally back in your own bed, Charles sighs in pained defeat. “She cheated on him while he was out with P.”
You cringe in disgust. “Has it been going on long?”
“Apparently so. About four months.” Charles climbs further into the blankets and pulls you into his chest. “He gave her the apartment. He was out late because he didn’t know where to go.”
“We could offer him a place here for the time being.” You suggest. The slightest hint of a smirk playing on your lips.
“Pretty sure you are just wanting to see more of him.” He chuckles. “But yes, I think it’s a good offer until he figures things out.”
“Don’t lie, you stare at him all the time! You’re going to be the one who outs us.”
“Shush amour. I’m exhausted and I know you are also. Now sleep.”
~
The week brings interesting events. Max does take the offer to move in, though he’s been quiet and reserved since he started staying with you. Max, Charles, and Lando went back to, now Kelly’s apartment, to get his stuff.
He comes back into the house crying. His heart shattered and the apartment a mere reminder of the events that occurred.
Your grateful it’s the off season and Max will hopefully have some time to process before the start of the new season. You and Charles don’t push him and give him space when he needs. Though you also invade when you can see he’s spiraling. Desperate attempts at not letting him go into those dark places are often just you being in the same room as him.
~
By the time Christmas rolls around, he’s doing the slightest bit better. He’s been out of the room more and you haven’t had to force him to eat. He decorates the apartment with you and Charles.
It’s disastrous.
The three of you can’t stop laughing at the mess you’ve made of the decor.
The three of you spend Christmas Eve with Charles’ family. Max hadn’t wanted to go home to his less then festive father and Victoria was away with her in-laws.
You obviously weren’t going to leave him alone and Pascale had been thrilled when he said he’d come to dinner.
You could tell he felt awkward and out of place at first, but everyone did their best to make him feel welcome. Soon he was relaxing, sipping on his drink and engaging in conversation.
~
Christmas and new years had gone by to fast. January had now descended and the cold weather had yet to completely let up.
Originally you thought Max would be out by now. That he’d want his own space as soon as possible. It’s not like he couldn’t afford it. Yet he stayed and you and Charles welcomed him in.
Max was seemed like he was healing. His eyes had regained their light. The one they lost those first days of December. He definitely hadn’t moved one though. You and Charles could still hear the soft sniffles from his room at night.
He may be smiling, but he’s still broken hearted.
The most interesting new additions are the cats. The felines that are Max’s children. He would probably murder for his cats and become the next John Wick. There is something wholesome and sweet about his interactions with his pets.
Charles on the other hand has a bad relationship with animals in general. Small felines included. He like them, they just don’t like him back yet. Max has been letting him feed them until they realize he is nice.
You also have learned that you can share meal prep with Max. You’d banned Charles from it after he tried once and failed miserably. Max isn’t the best in the kitchen, but he helps out and cooks some nights.
~
February. The month of love.
Everything around reminds Max of what happened. How he will not be doing anything special for the holiday. He doesn’t even want to go out of the apartment and you and Charles have to drag him to go get fresh air.
The fateful day comes around and you and Charles have agreed to keep it small.
Corny, sweet, and romantic is Charles definition of a good day and treats you accordingly.
You try to get Max to come eat something but end up just leaving it at the door.
Despite what people may think, Max is romantic at heart. Charles learned this last year when the Monegasque asked him if he was doing anything with Kelly for the holiday.
You and Charles are lounging on the sofa with a movie playing in the background. His arm draped around you and mouth pressing silly kisses along your jaw.
“I can feel your worry radiating from here.” Charles stops his kisses and you roll your eyes at him in response.
“He’s not eaten all day and I’ve heard him crying. Just wish I could help is all.”
Charles hums in your ear. “We could see if he wants a distraction.” He punctuates his sentence with a cheeky smile.
“Charles Perceval Leclerc! You can not seriously be suggesting what I think you are.” You playfully bat his arm. “I highly doubt he would neither want that or like that.”
“How about we ask and then go from there.”
“I think you just want him to fuck you.” This time it’s your turn to give a cheeky smile.
~
This is definitely not how you envisioned asking Max about this would go. His teary eyes haven’t looked away from Charles since the pretty male started talking.
This left you in an odd place of trying to read his reactions and getting absolutely nothing.
“We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to or if you’re not into it. We would completely understand.” Charles laughs but you can tell he’s nervous. His body language betrays him.
Max looks between the two of you like he’s considering something. “You’re telling me you’ve both been crushing on me since last year? And I didn’t notice?”
“You’re very oblivious at times.” You shrug.
“That’s fair but also not the point.” Max stands up out of the bed and starts pacing. “I just don’t understand why me. You two are amazing people and you’re so great together.”
“Y/N has a numbered list of reasons in her phone that we’ve created in case this ever happened.” Charles looks at you expectantly but Your already pulling up the list.
“-please don’t read it I’m already blushing and that will make it worse. Maybe one day but not now.”
All of you freeze at the fact he insinuated a future.
“Does this mean you like us back?” Charles almost purrs. He’s so flirty now but if this goes farther then just a confession tonight he’ll be stuttering and weak in the knees. You know from experience.
Max is the stuttering mess right now however. He’s lost all of his words and is simply gesturing with his hands.
“Breathe Maxy, take your time.” He manages a few and usable to get a grip on his thoughts.
“I’ve to confess something first.” You both look at him expectedly but don’t push him. “The reason Kelly cheated on me is because she’d found a journal of mine. It was a thing my therapist told me to do and so I did. When you two started coming around more, I fell hard. For both of you. I wrote about to hopefully understand myself better and get the thoughts out of my head but they stayed and I hated myself for it. She read it and thought I cheated first so she just did it back.”
He’s in the verge of tears again but you and Charles can only stare I’d utter disbelief. Apparently, both of you are also oblivious.
“Please say something.”
“I think it must be fate.” Again that smirk is tugging at Charles lips.
The air in the room is replaced by a new tension. The kind Charles was originally insinuating before you three started talking.
“So about that proposal then…”
Valentine’s Day definitely couldn’t have ended any better.
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waywardcrow · 2 months
Text
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I’d do bad things with you.
Summary: The day after the wedding, Bucky and his new wife go to Stark's house to plan their next step because that's why they are married, right? Not because they love each other.
Pairing: Mob!Bucky x Stark!reader.
TW: Really not so many, talks of murder but very lightly, implications of mafia kind of stuff but please remember all I know about this I learned from SoC and fics lol, allutions to death, mention of cheating and sex, lots of angst, curvy!reader, no mention of y/n and reader's nickname is Bells (context coming soon), kind of enemies to lovers but not really enemies, arranged marriage, this will be a +18 story so minors dni.
Disclaimer: English is not my first language, please tell me if I make grammar mistakes.
Part of the Yours to lose series.
All eyes on us <<<
Pictures from pinterest and graphic and dividers by the amazing @ firefly-graphics so all credits to the creators.
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Bucky didn’t dare to say anything when his wife closed the door of the guest room, how could he? His dragă asked for one thing: help to protect her family.
That didn’t mean she owned him something, she was his wife but not his woman, not anymore.
If only he wasn’t so impulsive, if he weren’t so blind to recognize what he had in front on him, they wouldn’t be in this situation, their wedding wouldn’t be an arrangement, he would had ask her to marry him instead of trapping her.
Still, he had hopes, he would never give up in getting her back, and when Bucky finally did it, he would make up for the lost time.
Alone in her room, Bells felt the Barnes’ family ring heavy in her hand, not only for the rose diamond, it was heavy because she didn’t deserve it. She was well aware she only had it because she ended up being a Stark, there was no way this could ever happen to her being the mistress on turn for the Winter Soldier.
And even knowing it, she missed those times.
Everyone that worked in the restaurant knew she was sleeping with him, they also knew it was better for their tongues that she never heard them talk about it, Bucky made an example of the first and only one who tried, a jackass named Julian who liked to make women uncomfortable.
After that, everyone turned a blind eye when Bucky when to the bar and talk to her for hours, when he called her to his office and she used disappeared in there to don't go back to work for the whole shift, they saw them going home at night, both being walking proof of the affair.
Her friends sometimes looked at Bells with concern; especially Kate but no one said a thing.
She would get in the car with Bucky who would try to convince her to stop working so he could spoil her and Bells would gave him the same answer, she only wanted him, not his money.
It was so stupid of her, to believe he could feel the same one day but how could she not think it when he played his part so well? Treating him like she was something delicate, something beautiful, she wanted to believe he could want her, love her.
That was why she spent most of the nights with him during the months her fantasy ran wild, she was even familiar with his men, Steve and Sam adored her, Scott, Thor and Clint were sweet with her, even the stoic Loki smiled sometimes at her jokes.
Bucky made her feel at home, she had free reign in the house except for his office and they found their routine very quickly.
Even in the nights Bucky couldn’t join her right after work, he would find her sometimes eating alone in the kitchen or taking a shower and he would made up to her, he was so tender with Bells, making her feel everything was right, maybe it was because she never had a real home and she craved it that she was so easy to fool.
After taking the dress off her and removing her make-up, the girl curled in bed, refusing to cry again for him.
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“Good morning, dragă, I made breakfast” was the first thing Bucky told his wife in the morning. His wife, he would never get tired of saying it even if it was only in his head.
She looked beyond beautiful, the ivory set of pants and jacket hug her curves and he was loving the cleavage cut he could see from his place in the counter. His wife looked like what she was, a Queen.
“Don’t call me that, James” hearing his name on her lips hurt but he deserved it, at least she didn’t call him by his last name.
Their last name.
“Does my lady prefer any other nickname?” he asked without stop smiling, serving her coffee like he knew she liked it.
“I have a name, stick to it”
Her name was beautiful, both of them, the one her parents gave her and the one he met her with but she was the woman he loved, dragă was really appropiate.
“You used to love when I called you that, I don’t think I should change it if we want this marriage to be believable” he shrugged, knowing well why his wife didn’t like it anymore.
“We made a deal, Barnes” oh, James was gone “you will not make anyone believe this after we deal with our enemies”
She really did believe he would give up on her, which almost made him smile. His dragă still had to learn a few things about him.
“You should eat, Mrs. Barnes, we have to be at your brother’s house in half an hour”
Bucky was the least happy about working with Tony Stark, he supposed they could have been friends in another circumstances but he hurt his sister, if Natasha would ever did the same to Becca, Bucky would never forgive her.
Thor drove them to Stark’s mansion and Bucky hated how at ease his wife was there, that wasn’t her home, not anymore.
Russo and Castle were waiting besides Stark who hugged his wife and kissed her cheeks, taking her away from Bucky, leaving him scowling beside Steve and Sam.
“You look like you drank your weight in alcohol, Billy” she giggled and Bucky’s heartache increased, when was the last time he made her laugh? He couldn’t remember.
“Are you trying to tell me something, topolina?” Russo inquired with an offended look while they walked to Stark’s office.
“Yes, she means you look like shit Bill” Castle answered before his wife could and they all laughed but Russo and Bucky, Sam and Steve were too busy talking with Thor to notice. He watched as they took her inside the house bringing back her sweet personality, all the love she felt for them that made him mad watching the “proof” of her betrayal slapping him in the face once again.
Maybe Hydra staged all that but it was his fault, his own insecurities and ghosts were what made her hate him and he couldn’t see the way out of the mess he created, not when the scars that piece of shit gave her in his murder attempt were visible every time Bucky could see her arms.
“Are you ok Buck?” Sam asked quietly, his gaze following Bucky’s, his dragă was smiling at Pepper and Tony, touching her sister in law’s bump. He might never get that with her and if it wasn’t with her- Bucky knew it now, if it wasn’t her, it was no one.
“I’m fine, let’s go”
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Pierce had endless resources, deals with powerful people, enough money to buy himself a kingdom, lots of people who would kill for him without hesitation but with all that, he had an Aquiles heel.
“We know he feels like he already won the reelection for Mayor but I’m not so sure” Bells projected a picture of a handsome man dark hair. He had a kind smile and even the red sunglasses didn’t disminished his likable aura “Matthew Michael Murdock was born and raised in Hell’s kitchen, he graduated Columbia with honors with his best friend, Franklin Nelson, the current District Attorney and he was a champion of the people as a lawyer in his neighborhood despite he had multiple chances to work for a big firm, all of that changed when his soon to be wife, Karen Page, got in the way of Wilson Fisk”
Billy raised his hand as if he was in a classroom.
“Why does this sound like someone talking about their crush and how this helps us?” next to him, Maria hit him in the head and he yelped “I’m just saying!”
“She has a point, you would know it if you let Bells finish” his sister smiled at her friend “please go on topolina.
“Thanks Maria, you’re right as always” Bells winked at her and Maria blow her a kiss “Murdock it’s going to help us beat Pierce in the legal side and meanwhile dear Karen would help us convince him to let us give his campaign a hand” there was a mischievous grin in her face that Bucky had never seen before and it took everything in Bells to look away from him.
Pepper then cleared her throat and Bells took her seat, everyone looking at the ginger.
“Since Fisk got killed in jail, Miss Page got out of witness protection and Mr. Murdock reinforced his fight against the system from the political side” Bells helped her showing reports of Murdock’s popularity, his good press, all the people that supported him “we are going to destroy Pierce taking everything from him. Natasha and Yelena are working with Wanda and Maria to take more territory from him, Madani and Torres keep going after his most powerful lieutenants just like we talked about the last meeting.”
The map in the screen showed the comparison of the before and after, all the east side of the city that once was Pierce’s now it was all theirs, there were still parts resisting the change, it would have been quicker if the group didn’t tried to make the transition the less bloody as possible.
It wasn’t about power, even if it was what their line of work demanded, it was about revenge.
Pierce took something irreplaceable from each one of them, it would be only fair they’d leave him with nothing.
This time Bucky catched Bells eye and refused to let her go.
If not for Pierce, maybe they still would been together but maybe not, Bells was so afraid to tell him the truth about who she really was when Tony found her and it just added to the impending disaster they were, they would been living a lie, she would have been just the mistress, the toy on turn for someone that didn’t loved her.
Bells had to remind herself she didn’t need Bucky, she couldn’t, not after being the target of his cruelness, she couldn’t wash the memory of him fucking Jenna on his desk after telling Bells he loved her hours before.
She knew the truth now, she couldn’t forgive him, not when Bells’ heart was still aching for Bucky’s betrayal, for his lack of faith in her, for his lack of love towards her.
On the other side, Bucky was proud of her, his dragă was born to rule at his side and he didn’t care if he had to hunt Alexander Pierce himself, he would do anything to do this right.
If the murder of his father taught him something, it was that he wouldn’t fix anything feeling sorry for himself, Bucky had all the chances in the world to make amends and he would pay for every mistake with the blood of their enemies.
Tag list: learisa blackhawkfanatic queerqueenlynn calwitch pono-pura-vida
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Hiya! This took me so long but it was only because I was stressing myself about it, then I decided to do whatever felt right and here we are! Also the nicknames I used here:
dragă: sweetheart.
topolina: little mouse.
Let me know what you think.
Love, Lily.
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lemonlover1110 · 7 months
Text
𝐌𝐲 𝐁𝐞𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐝
Toji Fushiguro
[Chapter 6] Same Old
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Pairing: Toji Fushiguro x f!Reader
Chapter Warnings: Angst, Talks of Abortion, Toji being a major asshole, Talks of Cheating
Discord +18 - Twitter - Ko-Fi
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You feel awful during the week. Nothing to do with pregnancy symptoms but the fact that your husband– Rather, ex-husband is just the biggest scum that you’ve ever come across. You knew that he didn’t want kids, and you should’ve expected his response to be an abortion. You just didn’t expect him to react happily at the thought that he finally trapped you, meaning that he doesn’t care about the fact that you’re having a baby, he just wants you unable to go anywhere.
You’ve grown to resent him even more. And you’re growing to resent yourself because you can’t stop loving him. You wish you could rip your heart out and get rid of your feelings, alas, it isn’t that simple. You’ll have to learn to move on slowly, and balance the love and resentment that you hold of him… The father of your child.
Maybe he’s right. Maybe you should get an abortion so you’re not tied to him for the rest of your life. But you also want to be a mother, even if it means that you’re stuck with Toji one way or another.
Your personal issues leave you absentminded at work. You barely hear the phone ringing, and when you do, it’s almost too late. You luckily pick it up. That’s your only job, answering phones, it’d be a shame if you couldn’t do that correctly.
“I’m here to talk to–” You hear a very familiar voice, and you feel a sigh leave your lips as you look up at him. You finish the conversation on the phone, and when you hang up, you clear your throat to ask,
“What are you doing here, Toji?” You make it clear that you’re not exactly pleased with his presence, and he rolls his eyes at your reaction. He isn’t here for you either way. He opens his mouth to speak but you do it before him, “Will you please leave me alone? I think we need a lot of time away from each other before–”
“Toji!” You turn your head to the woman that calls out his name. A manager in your workplace. She walks over to Toji, and you watch as they share a hug, one that lasts too much for your liking. They’ve known each other for some time, that’s clear, but Toji hasn’t come around in the time that you’ve been working here. She looks at you and orders, “Tell my assistant to cancel all my meetings.”
“Yes, ma’am.” You respond, watching as she walks back to her office and he follows behind. You do as she says, dialing the extension and telling the assistant that his boss is occupied. You feel your blood boil, even though you don’t care about Toji’s romances. If he has something going on with that woman, it obviously started while you were together. 
Your chest feels heavy, thinking about the one time you chased him around thinking that he was cheating, but he was just working. Maybe he didn’t have to go elsewhere because his job had all he needed. Maybe you trusted him too much. You shouldn’t care, you’re already separated anyway. But you have to know.
You obviously can’t barge into the office and demand answers, matter of fact, you still don’t really want to talk to Toji. You try to not pay any attention to him, and to do that you decide to look at baby clothes. You shouldn’t, you don’t have the money for it right now, there’s other things you should figure out. It doesn’t hurt to look though.
Someone knocks on the reception desk, making you look up and away from the computer screen that displays the cutest onesie. It’s the assistant, Nanami. You smile at him, tilting your head to the side before asking, “How may I help you?”
“Why did she cancel?” He asks, and you shrug.
“She’s with Toji. Probably fuc–” You keep the thought to yourself. You don’t want to be inappropriate at work. Nanami’s brows raise.
“You think there’s something going on there? She’s just really flirty and he returns it because he’s trying to sell something to her.” He tells you, and you sigh. You want that to be the situation because you can’t stand the thought of hating Toji but knowing that he’s been cheating might be your final straw. “That’s what some people say though. I have no idea. Others say that they’re together.”
“It’s none of our business in the end, I guess.” You say and he hums in response.
“Are you two on a first name basis or what? Never heard someone refer to him as Toji, not even my boss.” Kento says, and you’re taken back by the question. You didn’t really expect that question especially since the man in front of you isn’t all that talkative; he’s bored and has nothing to do but he still has to stick around.
“We have a long history together.” You answer, not bothering to give more details. He isn’t going to pry. He nods his head in response, and since he has nothing more to ask or say, he leaves reception and goes back to his desk.
For the rest of the work day, you find yourself looking at baby clothes, growing excited over the fact that you’re growing life inside of you. Even if it’s Toji’s child.
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The biggest sigh leaves your lips when you’re finally home after a long day at work. You luckily have the night off from your second job, and now you have the time to lounge around and be lazy. You were planning on leaving your second job once you got the chance to move out but since you’re pregnant, you have to save up your money so you can take some time off when your baby comes– Additionally, all the costs that come with a baby. You’re not counting on Toji.
A groan leaves your lips as you stretch. You get up from your couch and walk to the bathroom to turn on the faucet and fill the tub with water. You need a nice long bath to unwind, and hopefully it’ll help you to get your mind off Toji and the fact that he may have been cheating on you while you were married. You want to believe Nanami, but he’s oblivious to pretty much everything that’s going on around him.
You get undressed and soak yourself in the tub when it’s full. You allow yourself to relax in the warm water, shutting your eyes, trying your best to not fall asleep in the water. You have to open your eyes when you catch yourself drifting off. You grab a bottle of your bath bubbles and pour some into the water so you can entertain yourself like that.
You begin to play with the water to make bubbles, and when your bath is filled with them, you hear a knock on the front door. It’s rather aggressive, so it’s hard not to notice. You get out of the water, irritated as you grab a towel and dry yourself off. You don’t have enough time to run to your room to change into clothes so you grab your bathrobe and wrap it around yourself.
When you approach the door, the person knocks again, even harsher than before. You open the door, and you aren’t surprised to find your ex-husband standing before you with a bag that contains what you assume is food. You cross your arms, tilting your head to the side and ask, “What are you doing here?”
“Thought we’d have some dinner together after the awkward events from earlier.” He says, trying to disregard the fact that you’re just wearing a bathrobe with probably nothing underneath. The thought alone drives him wild. 
“Why would I want to have dinner with you?” You ask him, letting it be known that you’re not exactly pleased with his presence. You don’t understand why you have to make it painfully obvious that you don’t want to be near him, he should know at this point. He’s just ignoring what you want for his own selfish reasons. You shouldn’t be surprised though, you married him knowing how selfish he is; you didn’t expect to divorce him though, and you didn’t expect his selfishness to affect you while you’re separating.
“I could tell you were upset when I left… So why not?” He responds and you don’t budge. He tries to weakly smile, and it comes off awful. “And you’re pregnant so I got you your favorite.”
“Fine.” You end up agreeing. You’re hungry and the thought of eating your favorite food brings joy to your heart– Except you’re not even sure if Toji bought the right meal, he doesn’t know you that well. You don’t think he does. But you’re hungry anyway. “You can set the table while I put on some clothes.”
“I don’t know–” He begins but you cut him off before he can finish his sentence.
“You wanted to have dinner with me, you can figure it out yourself. It’s not that hard.” You give him attitude before you walk to your room, leaving him to figure it out. Going through all the drawers isn’t that hard, he’s still a bit annoyed that he has to do so. He can’t really argue with you though since the last thing you want is for him to be at your apartment.  You walk back, asking, “Did you find everything?”
“Yeah.” He answers, walking over to the table to organize the plates and utensils. You take a seat while he handles that. You watch as he does a task that he never did while you were married. You never really minded though, you had an agreement: you take care of the house while he pays for every bill. 
When he takes a seat, you waste no time in serving yourself food. A small smile comes to your lips when you realize that he, in fact, did get your favorite food. You wipe it off your face before he can see it. You don’t want to give him that satisfaction of seeing you smile. 
You quietly begin to eat when the food is served. Toji doesn’t like the silence, even if it’s what he wanted a couple of months ago. He clears his throat before asking, “So… Why were you upset?”
“I wasn’t upset.” You answer with your mouth full of food. You don’t want him to think that you’re upset, even though you so clearly are.
“When I left, I tried to talk to you but you couldn’t even look at me.” He points out, and you continue eating in silence.
“You should leave. Megumi already spends a lot of time alone.” You try to change the topic and kick him out of the apartment but that won’t work so easily on him. He takes a deep breath, standing up from the chair and walking to your kitchen to grab himself a glass of water.
“Why were you upset?” He asks, and you decide that suppressing your feelings isn’t really going to solve much. You sigh.
“Were you cheating on me while we were married?” You finally ask the question that’s been bugging your mind all day. Toji chokes on the water that he drinks, punching his chest as he coughs it out. You wait for his response patiently, watching him as you eat the food that’s in front of you.
“Why would you even suggest that? Do you not trust me?” He sounds deeply offended by the question, making another sigh leave your lips. You should’ve known that would be his response.
“I don’t. You did it once, you might do it again.” You tell him, and his brows furrow.
“That happened months into our relationship and you decided to stick around. I never did it again, I swear to you on my life.” He argues, which doesn’t really help you. You can’t bring yourself to trust him, at least not now.
“Then why was that lady so… Touchy. A little too close.” You remind him, and a smirk comes to Toji’s lips. He tilts his head to the side before asking,
“Are you jealous?” Which makes you roll your eyes. You don’t care to answer that, of course you’re jealous but you won’t admit it to him.
“Answer.” You order, and he puts the glass down. He walks back to the table and takes a seat. It feels like forever as you wait for him to answer. Your heart feels like it’s about to beat out of your chest as you wait for a response.
“Flirting comes with the job sometimes. Flatter her, secure the company’s business.” He answers, and your eyes widen.
“I–” You open and close your mouth a couple of times, trying to figure out what you say. You’re hurt by his actions, and it leads you to say, “That’s cheating, Toji.”
“No it isn’t. I never wanted anything to do with her.” He points out, which doesn’t really help you. You feel nauseous and you have to stop eating before you throw it all back up. You have to take a deep breath before speaking again,
“Imagine if I started flirting with some random guy just to secure a good tip–” You begin but he cuts you off.
“If it’s your job, I wouldn’t care. You’re making more money for us.” He says, making you take another deep breath. You can’t believe this is the conversation you’re having with him.
“Right… You wouldn’t care. You wouldn’t even care if I was flirting just for attention.” You respond, and he crosses his arms. He clicks his tongue.
“What are you trying to say?” He asks, which makes a sigh escape your lips. You have to look away from him because you feel the tears well up in your eyes.
“That you’ve never really cared about me like that Toji. You wanted someone to fill the role of your wife, and that’s what I did essentially. You never cared for me as your lover though, you couldn’t care less about what I did as long as I continued to play wife.” You tell him, and he rolls his eyes. He’s tired of listening to this. 
“That’s not true.” He responds. Of course. He’s not going to admit his faults, he never will.
“And if I told you I slept with someone once while we were together… Would you feel jealous? What if I told you I was seeing someone else now?” You bring up, and his brows raise. He finds himself speechless, completely unsure of how to respond to that. He ends up chuckling before saying,
“I wouldn’t feel jealous because I know neither of those things are true.” He knows you better than you think. But that’s not the reaction you want to see. “Let’s drop this. I was never cheating on you, now that that’s settled–”
“Maybe it isn’t cheating but it certainly hurts my feelings.” You respond, not wanting to drop the subject yet. “You couldn’t even bother giving me that type of attention, but you could do it to other women.”
“Why are you so overdramatic?” He scoffs. 
“You’re right, Toji. I’m overdramatic. Yet you’re the one here that refuses to leave because for some stupid reason you think we can get back together.” You slightly raise your voice at him, and he pinches the bridge of his nose.
“Why do I have to constantly show you that I love you? Do you not believe me?” He proceeds to ask which nearly makes your eye twitch. You can’t believe how long you stuck with this man.
“No! I made it clear that I don’t trust you.” You waste no time in answering. “Plus I’ve never been sure of your love in the first place.”
“I do love you.” He responds. You’re tired of hearing the same lie over and over again. You don’t see the point, he can just find another woman to play as his wife. 
“This feels like the same conversation. We have this conversation every single time we talk.” You say, focusing back on eating. “Let’s not. Let’s change the topic or finish eating in silence.”
“Right.” Toji ends up sighing. “I’m covering half of your rent and your bills. I want you to leave your second job.”
“Huh?” You’re not sure if your ears are deceiving you. But he repeats it and you’re right. “What about your gambling addiction? Can you handle that?”
“Don’t bring that up. I don’t have an addiction either way.” Toji responds. But you’re not leaving your second job. He isn’t reliable. Even if you want to leave your second job to have nights off and be able to relax. “I guess… It’d be ideal if you moved back in but you’re not doing that.”
“Why are you doing this? Do you suddenly care about the pregnancy?” You ask. You don’t want him to be doing this simply because he wants to win you back, but knowing him he might be doing this just for that. 
“I guess I have no other option. It’s my baby too.” He ends up saying, and you have no idea if you’re supposed to feel good about it. You have mixed emotions over it. “I can’t be a shitty father.”
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wreckedandpolemic · 10 days
Note
6,98,99. Sorry for the multiple numbers, they just work so well together.
Also love your work!💜
my kink is karma - matty healy
(mdni) in which your ex wants to give you a birthday treat. too bad for your boyfriend. 2099 words.
warnings: cheating, semi-public sex, daddy kink
Firstly, you’d like to say that you’re not a spiteful person, thank you very much. But fuck if it doesn’t feel good to run into your ex drinking alone while celebrating your birthday with your friends and your shiny, new boyfriend. Matty salutes you with his glass when you spot him, and you ignore him pointedly. He won’t fucking leave it alone, though — that’s always been his problem.
“Of all the gin joints in all the world, she walks into mine,” says Matty, low in your ear as you go to order yourself another drink at the bar. You hope he doesn’t notice the shudder that runs through you at the sound of his voice. “Whatever she’s having on my tab, yeah?” he adds smoothly, and you roll your eyes. 
“Oh, well, in that case, I’ll have a bottle of the most expensive champagne you’ve got,” you grin. What? He’s got the money for it, and you aren’t going to turn down a free drink on your birthday, of all days. Matty shrugs when the bartender looks at him to confirm, and she hands you the bottle in a cooler.
You turn to leave, go back to your friends, but Matty takes hold of your wrist, gentle enough that you could break out of it. Something stops you, though. “Happy birthday,” he mutters. “Thought about callin’, but…” he blows out a breath. “The way we left things, I didn’t know if you’d wanna hear from me.”
Feigning casualness, you shrug, pretending like the reminder of your heart-wrenching breakup doesn’t tear at you all over again. “Yeah… Well, you’re here now,” you say matter-of-factly. “How’ve you been?” you ask, despite knowing the answer. Over the last six months, you’ve taken some kind of twisted pleasure in keeping tabs on him, in watching his life fall apart.
The two of you split in April, leaving you forced to move out of the apartment you loved that was in his name, nine days after you’d paid your half of the rent. June, he got arrested in a drunken bar fight; July crashed his car, the car he loved more than almost anything, leaving it completely written off; August, the girl he’d been seeing since suspiciously soon after your breakup left him with no warning. Meanwhile, you’ve had a promotion, gotten into the perfect relationship and everything is falling neatly into place.
Your reaction to him being around is involuntary, you tell yourself, fucking Pavlovian. You were together for three fucking years, of course your body still responds to him. It’s still learning what it’s like to live without him. Matty sighs, and you jolt out of your reverie as you remember you asked him a question. “Not great,” he admits. “Drinkin’ alone on a Friday night not tip you off?” he says, bitterness tracing his tone. “And yourself?”
“Oh, I’ve been great,” you say blithely. “I’m making great money, I’m in love, properly this time,” you can’t resist adding. “And you just bought me a bottle of champagne and told me everything sucks for you! What more could a girl want on her birthday?”
Matty scoffs. “You’re still the same,” he says coolly. “Bratty when you’re not getting fucked right, huh?” he adds, your stomach swooping at his words.
You don’t know what makes you admit it, some heady combination of mixed drinks and Matty’s presence for the first time in months overcoming all sense, but you murmur, “M’not. He’s not as good as you. S’the only thing I miss.” You try to weaken the admission.
Matty’s eyes light up, and you groan internally. “Is that so?” His grip tightens on your wrist and you stumble towards him when he tugs on it, a sickening pulse of arousal dripping down your spine. “Got everything you want, huh? Even down to your perfect little boyfriend. But you think about me when he’s fucking you, don’t you?” he breathes, something hard and dangerous in his tone, your heart thudding traitorously as he leans closer. 
“I… That’s not true.” you say, but the wavering of your voice betrays you, and he smirks wickedly.
“You can’t lie to me, baby. I know you too well.” The statement lodges in your throat like you’ve dry-swallowed a pill, the truth ringing disgustingly clear. “What do you say? You want one last good fuck, for old times’ sake?”
You should pull away. You need to pull away. You have to pull away. But you can’t. “Once a cheater, always a cheater,” you say. Matty’s eyes darken, but you know he took note of the most crucial element first: it wasn’t a refusal.
“I never cheated on you,” Matty says seriously. “I did a lot of other shit, I know I did, but not that. Never that.”
You swallow hard. “Okay.”
“Okay, what?”
“One more time. One more fuck. I need you out of my system,” you breathe, and you could almost cum from the filthy look on his face. Guiltily, you slink to the bathroom, casting furtive glances around and praying nobody spots you trailing after Matty and slipping behind a locked door.
Matty slams you against the door the second it shuts, devouring you in a harsh kiss, teeth and tongue sliding together almost violently. Having his hands on you again feels horrifyingly good, nauseatingly familiar. He’s hard, you can feel as he presses his body against yours, and you whimper pathetically into his mouth. “God, you’re so fuckin’ pretty,” Matty groans, like he can’t help himself. “Makes me sick. Been fuckin’ dying for you, baby.”
“So hurry up,” you snap. “I know you’re here alone, but I have people who care, and not much time before one of them notices I’m missing.”
“Such a brat,” Matty teases. “Need a good fuck to shut you up, yeah? S’alright, baby. Daddy’s here now. Gonna give you what you need.” The bottom falls out of your stomach and his words, a helpless, strangled moan escaping you. “Oh, missed your Daddy, have you, darling? Not given your little boyfriend my name, right?”
“N-no,” you stammer. “He… he wouldn’t understand. You’re my Daddy, couldn’t replace you.” Your skin feels like it’s on fire, your mind dizzy with desire, the words spilling from your lips without permission.
You’d forgotten how it feels with him, how Matty gets you sick with lust, thick and palpable in the air of the small room. “Good girl,” he croons. “Bend over for Daddy, yeah? I’ll take care of you, don’t worry.”
You obey, the sight of your reflection sickening. You look fucked-out already, flushed red and panting. Matty’s hands come to rest on your hips, stroking appreciatively over the curve of your ass and pushing your too-short dress up around your hips. Torturously slow, he pulls your panties off, motioning for you to step out of them when they hit the floor. “I’m keeping these,” he says, slipping the scrap of lace into his pocket. “Something to remember you by, yeah?”
Wrapped up in his touch as you were, the reminder that this is a one-time thing shocks you like you’ve been doused with ice water. Right now, you don’t have a fucking clue why you even broke up, not when his fingers are so achingly close to your dripping core. “God, Matty, please!” you choke out, widening your legs desperately. 
“Give me a minute, baby. Missed this pretty cunt so much. Gotta make sure I don’t forget a thing, if this is the last time m’gonna get to have you.” He brushes his fingers through your folds, your body jolting at the barest touch over your swollen clit. Meeting your gaze in the dingy mirror, Matty wraps his lips around his wet fingers, moaning exaggeratedly as he sucks them clean. “God, missed the way you taste, darling. Sweetest fucking girl I’ve ever had,” he promises, unbuckling his belt and unzipping his jeans.
You squirm, cold porcelain biting into your thighs. You hear the sound of a foil wrapper tearing open, and before you can process, Matty slides into you, your knees buckling at the sudden fullness. “F-fuck,” you whimper, the feeling of being wholly surrounded by him familiar as he thrusts deep into you, pleasure cascading over your bones.
“God, you feel so fucking good, baby. It’s okay, it’s okay, I’ve got you. Daddy’s gonna fuck you until the only word you remember is my name,” Matty promises, shushing you soothingly as you whimper. His hips slam against yours, ecstasy flooding your veins as your thighs bash against the sink. He fists a hand in your hair, dragging you up to meet your own gaze in the mirror. “Look at yourself, baby. Look how gorgeous you are, falling apart on my dick. Right where you should be, hm?” he murmurs, heat flooding your belly as you watch yourself take his cock over and over. “He could never fuck you like this, huh? Whose girl are you, really?”
“M’yours, Daddy. Yours, still yours, all yours,” you babble, cunt clenching wantonly around him as his smirk grows and his pace speeds. You moan horrifyingly loud when he hits that spot inside of you, too dizzy with desire to control your noises.
“Shh, baby, shh. Try not to be so noisy, yeah? Can’t let anyone know what we’re doin’ in here, that this lying fucking bastard has you split open and begging on his cock.” He throws your words from your final fight back in your face, pinching your clit meanly and fucking you deep. You can’t hold back another whimpering scream, and he scoffs. “Needy little whore can’t keep quiet, huh?” he murmurs, sliding two of his fingers into your mouth. Eagerly, you suck on them, your moans muffled as saliva pools under your tongue.
Heat scorches through you, every thrust of Matty’s hips and grunt that falls from his lips sending an illicit spark of pure pleasure racing up your spine. You can’t think, can barely breathe, choked in desperate lust that drips out of you and soaks him. He’s right, you can’t remember anything but him, his name circling your head, denting your brain out of shape. Nothing but Matty, Matty, Matty. “This fuckin’ pussy drives me insane, baby. Always so wet for me, so wet for your Daddy. Could have this all the time, if you wanted.”
His words cut through the fog in your mind as Matty slides his fingers free from your mouth to let you answer. “What do you mean?” you stammer, your disloyal heart skipping a beat.
“We had issues, yeah. But we were good together,” Matty murmurs, rubbing distracting circles into your clit, training you into giving the right response. “I’ve had a lot of time to think over the last six months. About us.” He slams his hips against yours on the final word, pleasure roiling in your stomach, every muscle in your body stringing taut. “I want another try. I know it would be better this time. I’d be better,” he promises, nails digging possessively into your hips.
“Matty, I–” You’re at a loss for words. His face crumples almost imperceptibly; if you weren’t so attuned to him, you wouldn’t have known.
“S’okay, baby. Fucked you too dumb to answer, I get it. You wanna be a good girl and cum for Daddy?” You nod wildly, his circles over your clit getting tighter and faster and you whimper helplessly, but you don’t miss how he’s stopped meeting your eyes.
Ecstasy winds around your veins, sticky, hot desire pinning you still as Matty fucks into you. “Fuck, Daddy, m’gonna–” you gasp out, the tension in your body finally breaking, stars going supernova behind your eyelids. Your legs tremble, your entire body going limp as waves of pleasure swirl in your stomach and buffet your organs.
“I’ve got you, baby,” Matty murmurs soothingly. “Daddy’s got you. Whenever you want, I’ll be here,” he promises, and a split-second later you feel his cock pulsing inside of you, the feeling of his cum spilling in your cunt sorely missing.
It takes a few moments before your legs have stopped shaking enough for you to stand, Matty supporting your waist as you clutch your abused muscles. “We should… I should get back out there,” you say, raking your fingers through your hair in an effort to tame it. You both look well-fucked, the question of how you’re going to explain your absence rattling around your mind. Matty meets your eyes one last time, looking over his shoulder as he unlocks the door.
“When you get bored of him, call me. I’ll be waiting.”
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amsznn · 1 month
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FOOLISH - c. sturniolo
part 2 — part 1 here part 3 here
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warnings: slight cursing, toxic relationship
-
chris 🚫
hey
your phone illuminated with a text sent by the one person part of you unfortunately still loved and part of you actually despised.
you didn’t bother to answer, even though you really wanted to. you couldn’t be pulled back into the same cycle once again. it’s happened one too many times so you knew his scheme all too well.
this was the thing with chris. you’d catch him cheating, you put on a strong act for a while, then he texts, and you get roped in once again. he knew you too well. he knew how to get you back. but maybe not this time.
you laid flat on your stomach, attempting to get some sleep, before you heard a knock on your door. you groaned while laying there for a moment, hoping whoever it was would go away.
the knocks only got louder and more obnoxious. you swung your legs off the side of your bed and made your way to the front door. you unlocked it to reveal your other best friend.
nick.
“what are you doing here?”
“well hello to you too.” nick said while making his way inside. you watched as he kicked his shoes off, then your eyes traveled to the huge duffel bag he was carrying. slightly amused you crossed your arms against your chest.
“nick what are you doing here?”
nick huffed before dropping his duffel bag on the floor. “my two brothers are being fucking idiots as always,” he started before making his way to the kitchen, you followed to hear the rest of his rant. “so me, being the smart person that i am, thought ‘why not just have a sleepover with my best friend?’”
he opened one of your cabinets and pulled out a bag of chips. “hence, why ive graced you with my presence.” you could only laugh at nick, knowing full and well his brothers had to be really pissing him off for him to uber all the way here.
“better for me, i couldn’t sleep anyways.” you said while making your way towards him, to also stuff your face with sole chips.
“great, ‘cus i wanna watch a dance moms marathon.”
-
you and nick spent the whole night watching shows, making tiktoks, and eating a lot of snacks. in the end you both ended up crashing on your bed, completely exhausted.
now the sun was shining through your curtains. causing you to awake from your slumber. nick on the other hand was still knocked out so you decided not to disturb him.
you were busy doing your skin care when you heard what sounded like nick waking up from his sleep.
“y/n, i think im gonna make matt pick me up,” nick paused for a moment before yelling again. “we have a video to film.”
“okay, ill be out in a sec!” you yelled back. quickly washing your cleanser off. you made your way out of your bathroom and went to the kitchen where you found nick.
“want me to make breakfast?” you asked while looking through your fridge, looking for something to make.
“sure, but im gonna go shower.” nick rose from his seat on the kitchen island then treaded towards the bathroom.
you decided on just making acai bowls for the both of you. while chopping up some bananas you heard a knock on the door, you figured it was matt so you wiped your hands and made your way to the entrance.
cracking the door open slightly you could see matt’s figure. “hey, matt.” you smiled upon seeing your other friend. “hey y/n, is nick ready?”
you shook your head as you could hear the shower still running. “nope, he’s still in the shower.” matt sighed while checking his phone for the time.
“why don’t you come in though , i could make you breakfast too.” matt smiled at your offer and walked inside.
suddenly your eyes landed on another figure you did not know was standing there the whole time.
‘you have got to be kidding me.’ you thought. there stood chris, hands fidgeting with his phone. he was the first to speak up.
“hey, what’s up?”
you scoffed, he always did this. pretending like nothing ever happened. “are you fucking kidding me, chris?” you whisper-shouted so matt wouldn’t hear your dispute. you weren’t sure if they knew what was going on, heck you didn’t know if chris even told them you used to date. probably not since chris wanted to keep your situation ‘private.’
chris sighed and ran his hand through his hair. “lets not do this here, y/n”
“do what here?” you and chris’s attention shifted to nick who was standing in front of you two, wondering what all the whispering was about.
“nothing, are you coming in?” you quickly shifted the topic and your attention back to chris, inviting him inside. chris nodded and stepped inside.
the three of you made your way to matt who seated at the kitchen island, eating one of the acai bowls you made. you didn’t mind though, since your appetite was basically gone.
you sat on the opposite end of nick, leaving chris to sit beside matt. you caught up with 2/3 of the boys. chris was in his own world, but his eyes lingered on you whenever you spoke, which made it somewhat difficult for you to remember your train of thought as your eyes met his.
once the boys were finished, nick grabbed his duffle bag and gave you a hug as goodbye. “i’ll see you this weekend?” he asked while making sure to thank you as well. you nodded and waved goodbye to both him and matt.
“i’ll be out in a sec.” chris called out to his brothers, to which they both nodded. this only made you roll your eyes in irritation, seeing as he wasnt letting up.
chris moved forward to where you were standing, wrapping his arms around your waist. you stood there frozen, knowing if you reciprocated his action, you’d be back to being wrapped around his finger.
chris frowned at this and moved back to meet his eyes with yours. “are you really gonna stay mad at me, baby?” his voice just above a whisper as his hand caressed your face.
“i saw you chris. i saw you with that girl, i saw everything.” you said trying to keep your tears at bay, not wanting to crumble in front of him.
chris gently wrapped one arm around you, while bringing one hand to softly push your head down on his shoulder. you couldn’t help it anymore, tears started streaming down your eyes in frustration with both him, and yourself. chris listened to your sniffles and occasionally hiccups as he swayed you side to side.
“m’ sorry, baby.”
“it was a mistake.”
he pressed a kiss on the top of your head, while resting his own there. “i’ll be better for you, okay?” he pushed you back and cupped both sides of your face with his hands.
“i promise.”
you knew this was all bullshit. you knew in a matter of time he would just be with another girl, in another bed. forgetting about you. if you knew all this, then why? why was it hard for you to push him away?
chris smiled as you nodded your head, accepting his apology. he closed the gap between you two, gently planting his lips onto yours, bringing you closer with each movement of his lips.
that was when you knew,
how foolish you were.
-
A/N: sorry guys, i thought i’d be done with this earlier today but i was super busy today. hope you enjoyed this part. part 3 soon, not a set date yet tho!
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ataraxiaspainting · 3 months
Text
Just the Way I Am.
Yan Yuji x F Reader x Yan Sukuna.
Synopsis: Yuji is like the sun. His cursed half is like the moon. Both of them hurt you, but in different ways, but neither of them will stop. That mere fact, in the end, hurts you more than if only Sukuna was around because sometimes you think of terrible things. Terrible things like wishing Yuji, who used to always be your ray of sunshine, never existed at all or would die a slow and painful death.
Warnings: Yandere themes, manipulation, unhealthy relationships, violence, and a not-so-healthy dash of not SFW and misogyny (from our dear Sukuna of course).
Word Count: 850.
*~*~*~*
Yuji was not wearing the clothes he usually wore. Instead of his favorite outfit which consisted of a scarlet hoodie and black sweatpants, he simply wore his briefs, sitting on the couch opposite to the bed you had slept in since the night before, loudly eating some beef jerky you and he had gotten from the convenience store yesterday. All the noise was the reason you had woken up in the first place. Choosing not to voice it, though, you attempted to go back to bed. Perhaps that was the wrong decision though, because as soon as you closed your eyes and turned to face the wall, you felt long nails grip at your shoulder, sinking deep enough to almost make you bleed. It was foolish of you to do such a thing, you realize because Yuji only bought the jerky for Sukuna.
Before you could turn around to greet him, the pain went further into your flesh, making you wince.
“Who taught you to be so rude, huh?” The voice was as cold as it always has been, being as much more gruff than Yuji’s ever could be. “Answer me.”
His breath was smokey from the beef jerky but also smelled like rotting food, the instant ramen Yuji made along with a boiled egg he swore was not too old to eat. You try your best not to gag as you start stuttering out an apology.
“N-No one…”
“Oh really?” The voice changed to that of a mockery of something tranquil, something kind. Something like Yuji’s voice. But instead of begging you to stay the night while claiming it was too dark out for a girl to be walking to her dorm room alone, it was speaking to you like you had just done something you were too dumb to realize was stupid. You suppose, in a way, that that is what you had done. 
You forgot the very first rule Sukuna had told you to never disobey when you had woken up screaming at the sight of something that looked sort of like Yuji but did not act like him at all, and now you are in for yet another trip to hell itself. 
“I told you I didn’t want another brat. I already deal with one as it is.” He lets go, and out of instinct to not get hurt more than you already will today, you turn around to face him. He looks down at you, his arms crossed and shaking his head in a mix of amusement and disappointment. “You deal with him too. You know just how big of a pain in the ass he can be. ‘Oh, [First], let me carry you to my bed! Oh, [First], I’m sorry for hitting you when I thought you were cheating on me, please come back! Oh, [First], I’m not a pervert, but wear those shorts that show off your ass for me!’ Please, it’s all pathetic, isn’t it? He’s just as bad as me.”
Not wanting to get hurt even more, you agree by nodding your head faster than necessary, you think, because as a response Sukuna laughs so loud it hurts your ears.
“Tell me, just why haven’t you left him yet then, hm? Since you’re so eager to admit I am right.” 
Your answer is whispered low, though you already know Yuji can hear you, even when Sukuna takes his turn with the body they share. “Because of you. You’d… drag me back.”
“Good girl.” The customary compliments are merely a facade just like this one, no matter who is speaking. His resentment towards you remains intact. Soon, Yuji will also harbor the same fury, as he takes his rightful turn in that vessel they both inhabit. “You haven’t even been promoted to Grade 3 yet. Quite sad, wouldn’t you say? Not that a little girl like you should be a sorcerer to begin with.”
Once again, you nod your head.
“How would you ever hope to survive me, or even outrun me, the King of Curses?”
“I… I wouldn’t.”
Another praise that is just as empty as all the ones before it. With it, the walls of Yuji’s dorm feel even more like that of a prison’s, and this room feels even more small. If these walls could talk, they would tell you to run, or at least you would hope that they would.
“That’s right. So good.” Sukuna turns to face the only window in Yuji’s dorm. You look too. The sun is going down. Did you really sleep for that long? Not that you blame yourself, dealing with Yuji during the day could be considered a full-time job after all. “You fell asleep before I could get my turn. Now, how are you going to compensate me for that when it is fully night outside?”
As the sun descends like a sharp guillotine blade, you and Sukuna share a silent understanding of the inevitable. Your legs tremble at the impending doom, for both of you are well aware of the answer.
You’ll stay, won’t you?
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elllisaaa · 3 months
Text
how seventeen would confess to you - vu vers.
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-> pairing : svt vu × gn!reader
-> words count : 3.5k words
-> genre : svt members crushing on you, fluff
-> warnings : while make you giggle and kick your feet
-> sorry if I made any mistakes, english is not my first language.
-> reblogs and feedbacks are appreciated !
-> masterlist | svt masterlist
hhu vers. | vu vers. | pu vers.
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YOON JEONGHAN - SNEAKY
he’s a tease.
i’m sorry but do something ridiculous and he’s gonna bring it back until the end of your life.  
but you’ve been friends for a long time, and you have many embarrassing things to remind him too. 
so it’s really a silly little war of who will tell the most unhinged story about the other. 
both of you like to do game nights, but you eventually realized how competitive he was, and how he didn’t mind cheating as long as he won, luckily, you were the same.
it makes you laugh most of the time, especially when he is like that with his members.
but he also knows when to calm down and be serious. he would be there for you without you even needing to say anything.
i think he’s a great listener too, ready to ease all your worries and remind you of your own value. 
he’s the sweetest when he wants to, but he’s also a menace.
because he’s also flirty sometimes, playing it as a joke but deep down, he hopes that one day you’ll catch on how much you actually mean to him. 
being the tease he is, his confession would be like that too.
“- So, I need your advice on a situation.”
You sat in front of him, handing him a hot mug of tea, enough to last through all his gossip. It was not unusual for the both of you to meet on your days off and just spill the tea about your coworkers and friends, laughing at each other's stories. 
“- I’m all ears !
I have a friend who’s like… Really in love with his best friend, he has been for years actually. I think everyone around them has noticed how much he likes them, except them of course. And he wants to finally confess, but he doesn't know how to, and I don’t know how to help him myself.”
Jeonghan tried to not let any emotion show on his face as he was telling you his well-prepared speech. His goal was to keep on his little game for as long as he could, just to tease you like he loved too. He got out of his thoughts when you talked again, answering his indirect question. 
“- Well, I think he should just go for it. If they’ve been best friends for this long, they should be as comfortable around each other as we are, and he shouldn’t be afraid of breaking their relationship or not. Like, if you were telling me that you have feelings for me, it wouldn’t change anything for me. You’ll still be my best friend.”
Suddenly, doubt was filling up his heart. Has he been mistaken by your behavior and his friends' comments about the two of you ? What made him so sure that you loved him like he loved you ? But now that he was there, he should finish what he started, right ? Jeonghan took a deep breath, his eyes fixed on his cup of tea, too shy to meet yours.
“- And if I tell you that this friend is me… Would you reconsider the best friend title ?”
The silence that answered his question encouraged him to lift his head from the contemplation of his drink, meeting your wide eyes already staring at him, making him giggle. You finally snapped out of it, a soft smile stretching out your lips as you reached for his hand over the counter of your kitchen, interlocking your fingers. Jeonghan hoped you couldn’t hear his heartbeat going crazy at the simple and sweet gesture. 
“- It depends… If I get to call you my boyfriend, then yes.”
“you can call me whatever you want as long as i’m yours.”
HONG JOSHUA - SECRET
truly a gentleman like he’s holding the door for you, opens your water bottle for you, always asks if you need help when he has free time.
as seventeen makeup artist, you followed them on tour and on almost every event, being one of the seniors of your team. 
and joshua always asked you to do his makeup. 
you assumed it was because he had known you for a long time and was more comfortable around you than another younger makeup artist. 
but as time passed, he started to throw little compliments between asking about your day and what you had for lunch. 
he looooves the way you blush every time he tells you that you’re pretty. h
e’s so sweet too, always has one or two snacks ready when you come to do his makeup because he knows about your habit of skipping meals because of work. 
he would inevitably end up giving you his personal number, and you would talk all day, coming to know each other more and little by little, you fell in love with each other. 
but for the sake of both your jobs, it had to stay a secret, until one particular day. 
“- Where’s Y/N ?
- Ah ! They had to replace someone that called in sick today. I’m sorry, I know you like her to do your makeup.”
Joshua shook his head, encouraging your coworker to go on and carrying a little conversation with her. But she could tell that he was out of it. He was thinking about you. About how he became so used to your presence by his side everyday. How not having you close to him, talking to him, touching his face had him feeling empty, as if something was missing. Well, you were missing. And he didn’t realize until now how much he was relying on you. 
Of course, he knew how dangerous it was for his career to date you, how risky it was regarding your job too, but he couldn’t help being drawn to you everytime, and neither could you, like magnets attracting each other. He stayed professional on stage though, delivering his performance as perfectly as usual, but his members could tell that something was bothering him, and every one of them knew the reason very well : you. 
“- Hey Y/N.
- Joshua ? What are you doing here ?”
He didn’t answer right away, gesturing for you to follow him to an empty dressing room. You couldn’t help throwing glances all around you, making sure that no one was witnessing this. But you trusted Joshua : he would never put you or him in danger voluntarily. 
“- I have to tell you something. I’ve been thinking about it for a long time, and I believe you feel the same about it but I need to tell you regardless.”
His gaze was so soft, so loving, you couldn’t ignore anymore how he made your heart swell. You had noticed that your feelings were mutual, but you also knew that you couldn’t be together. 
“- You know we can’t… I don’t want to hold you back, I don’t want you to take such risks for me. You worked too hard for your dream to give it up just for me.”
Joshua could see your eyes filling up with tears, and he stepped forward, cupping your face in his hands in hopes it would comfort you. All he wanted was to take care of you, not to make you cry. 
“- It’s gonna be complicated, yes, but I don’t want to give up on either my career or you. You’re so dear to me, I think you don’t realize how much you mean to me, how right it feels to be appreciated for who I really am. Maybe… Maybe we can at least try. I love you so much Y/N.”
And how could you say no to that ? To his lovestruck gaze focused on you, only you ? How could you reject him when he’s all you can think about everyday ? You stepped forward to hug him, relaxing in his hold and warmth as Joshua let out an audible sigh of relief too.
“- I love you too, I love you so much…”
“you’ll be my secret, this way I can keep you all to myself.”
LEE JIHOON - IMPOSSIBLE
i think that he would be a little cold with you at first, out of shyness and because he’s an introvert.
but you always made sure to include him In your conversations with the other members, and to talk to him even if he didn’t answer more than two words. 
little by little, he started to open up, to feel really comfortable around you. 
maybe it was because of the way you always focused only on him whenever he was talking, or because you were always interested in whatever he was doing.
would want you to listen to every song he produces before everyone else because he values your opinion so much. 
he didn’t exactly know but he felt something so soothing when he spent time with you. 
so when mingyu told him that you had a boyfriend, he was disappointed – and even more so when he finally met him and saw how badly he treated you.
jihoon would go on and on about how shitty your partner was, advising you to leave him, not only because of his selfish reasons, but mainly because he felt like the boy didn’t deserve you. 
you would come to his studio after every fight, and he couldn’t do anything else than watching you cry your eyes out. 
“- I’m sorry, I’m always here bothering you…
- You’re never bothering me Y/N, if you need me, I’m here.”
You tried to smile, but that only forced another tear to roll down your already soaked cheeks. As if he knew better than yourself what you needed, Jihoon opened his arms and you gladly accepted his hug, basking in his warm embrace. 
“- What did he do this time ?”
Jihoon knew that his tone was accusative. But at this point, he couldn’t care anymore, he couldn’t bear to see you cry every other day because of an asshole who didn’t realize how lucky he was. And he could only assume that he did something bad, because all you’ve ever tried to do was make him happy. 
“- He just.. Forgot our date, again… I’m so tired of this Jihoon, I’m doing my best for this relationship to work but he doesn’t even try…”
Your voice was muffled by his hoodie, your face still buried in his chest as you talked, but your words still broke his heart. He was tired too. Tired of seeing you cry, tired of seeing you wasting your time for someone who didn’t care about you, tired of seeing you think that you were not enough. 
“- You already know what I think about this but… You should really leave him. You deserve to be loved, really loved. And he’s not loving you right.”
Slowly, you lifted your head from his chest, your teary eyes glaring confusingly at him. 
“- But who would love me right ? 
- Me. I would. I could be a better boyfriend than him.”
Jihoon lifted a hand, fingers brushing delicately against your cheek. He knew he could be good for you, knew that he could treat you well if only you let him, if only you let him one chance to prove it, he’ll do anything to make you happy. And you knew he would, knew that you would fit perfectly in his arms. But was it reasonable ? You had been with your partner for two years. Two years and still, what you felt for him never came close to what you felt for Jihoon, to how he made you shiver every time he touched you, to how he made butterflies come alive in your stomach every time he looked at you. 
“- I think you could…”
And even if both of you still needed to figure some things out, you knew that you finally made the right choice. You were finally where you belonged to. 
“i’m going to make up for all the times he couldn’t be by your side.”
LEE SEOKMIN - FLOWERY
sweet and funny.
i feel like he would treat you like his partner even if you’re not, maybe to hint at you that he has feelings but i mostly think it’s just because he cares so much about you.
he’ll do things like giving you his clothes when you’re cold, or feeding you when you want a taste of what he’s eating. 
basically, it’s almost like you’re already together because he’s also very touchy and clingy.
he’ll hug you as a greeting every time, and he always has his arm around your shoulders when you’re sitting next to each other. 
tbh, he would start to question your feelings at one point because was he not making it obvious enough that he had a big crush on you ???
but at the same time, he’s afraid that you mistake that for just a very close friendship so he doesn’t want to ask you straight away either. 
so he would try to make something a little more sneaky by delivering a bouquet of your favorite flowers at your place, with a card only saying “i love you”. 
“- Maybe they’re from Soobin ?”
You and your friend start laughing, but Seokmin, who witnessed the whole conversation, was not. Did you really think that these flowers were from someone else ? He clearly remembered the day you told him what your favorite flowers were, and that you also told him he was the only one to know that. So why would you lie to him ? Or tell it to anybody else ? Maybe it was nothing, but his heart felt heavy as he got back to his video game with Wonwoo. 
You obviously noticed how Seokmin was very distant the whole day. It was supposed to be a fun afternoon with most of your friends, but you ended up being more worried about what was going on with him. Did you do or say something to upset him ? Did you hurt him in any way without being aware ? You couldn’t recall anything that could explain why he was so cold with you.
“- Hey Seokmin…”
The boy turned around when you joined him outside, and he couldn’t avoid you, nor the conversation that would follow this time. He knew that he was being childish, knew that he should have maybe just told you how he felt instead of being upset over you for something you were not responsible for. 
“- Hi Y/N…
- You’ve been kind of avoiding me… Did I do something ? I just want to understand what happened so I can fix it.”
Seokmin closed his eyes and sighed, a pained expression on his face. He was dumb, he was so dumb. He wanted to make you feel loved, not like you did something wrong when it was him who was being sulky over nothing. 
“- Fuck, no… You didn’t do anything, I promise. I’m just a coward.”
You looked at him, confused as you cocked your head to the side and Seokmin turned around to face you, trying to hold your gaze even if he could feel his cheeks start to burn from how ridiculous he felt.
“- The flowers… They are from me. And I heard you say that you think they were from Soobin instead and I… I don’t know why but it hurt because you said that you only told me which one were your favorites. And it made me feel so special, I wanted it to stay our thing.”
You stepped in, until you could hold his hand in yours, intertwining your fingers with his. The atmosphere had switched to a much lighter one as you smiled at him, finding him very cute as he tried to look composed but was really not, with his red face.
“- I was joking, I knew they were from you, they could only be from you. And yes, it is our thing, because I want to share this kind of thing only with you. You’re special to me, and I wanted to thank you for your gift but you didn’t let me.”
Seokmin shook his head, laughing at his own stupidity. But all that mattered to him was how it turned out in the end. 
“next time i’m offering you flowers, it’s to celebrate our first date.”
BOO SEUNGKWAN - BRAVE
needless to say that he is a drama queen, always has something to bitch and vent about. 
but obviously, you’re the same - that’s why you get along so well - so you’re always here to listen to all his gossip, and vice-versa. 
i think that both of you would also hold a grudge about something ridiculous the other did years ago but that you still bring up during every argument (thinking about me and my best friend fighting over a piece of salad and a potato since middle school)
overall, it’s very entertaining to spend time with him because he’s so sassy… that’s hilarious. 
since you gossip a lot, you know almost everything about each other's lives, you have literally no boundaries. 
and you also love to sit down after a tiring week, with a show you both love as a background noise while you talk about what happened. 
a very comfortable relationship, based on trust and really open-minded.
that’s why you’re not afraid to talk to him about your love life even if seungkwan always seemed to push back on the subject (understandable when he had a crush on you for years).
“- So you’re going to meet with him again ?
- Yeah, I think so… He’s not really my type usually, but he’s not that bad, and he’s kind so maybe I should give him a chance.”
Seungkwan scoffed, looking away from your face and focusing on the tv instead. He didn’t want to hear another one of your failed dates with guys that didn’t deserve you. He never understood why you did that, not when he was right there. 
“- Why do you always react like that ? Do you not want me to find the love of my life ? 
- It’s not where you will find it.”
You hit his shoulder playfully, but you felt a weight on your heart as he rolled his eyes. Seungkwan was never really interested whenever you talked about your current love life. However, he loved to bitch about your exes, but everytime you mentioned a new guy you were expecting to go out with, he seemed almost annoyed. You never understood why, because he loved drama so much, and your dating life was the best source of drama. But for some obscure reason, he stayed silent. 
“- I just don’t want to be alone. 
- We’re always together, you’re not alone.
- I know but… I want to come home and have someone waiting for me and hugging me. And I want to fall asleep in somebody else's arms. And I want to feel loved at the end of the day.”
Your gaze was focused on the show playing on the screen, while Seungkwan was watching you, noticing how your facial expressions had changed. He knew you weren’t joking anymore, and maybe it was time for him to stop being silly too. 
“- I could do all that. You’ll never be alone if you were with me.”
When you looked at Seungkwan again, he was already staring at you, more serious than he had ever been. A smile blossomed on your face, because all you ever wanted was to be his.
“- Does that mean you're willing to offer yourself in sacrifice and be my boyfriend ?”
“if that means spending every day of my life by your side, then yes, i'll do it gladly.”
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-> i don't allow any copies, reposts or translations of my work.
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najlepsiznajlepsich · 24 days
Text
tolerate it.
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pairing: carlos sainz x reader
warnings: cursing, age gap (9 years), alcohol consumption, angst, loosely inspired by tolerate it by taylor swift
author's note: this my first ever published fic!! woohoo!! star = time skip, sorry for any mistakes, english is not my first language. (had this sitting in my drafts for a long long time)
The bright yellow light shone right in your face. Regret was the only thing that you were feeling right now. Your brother just had to have a big party for his birthday, only inviting his friends and you, for some reason. 80% of these people were strangers to you. It’s like you were totally out of place, cursing out your brother in your head.
Until you felt a hand on your shoulder. You turned around. “It is you!” the man in front of you said. Carlos. The guy you had a crush on years ago. You didn’t even recognize him at first. But you could recognize that Spanish accent in a crowd full of people. His voice was like a lollypop, reeling you in to hear all his sweet whispers.
He wasn’t the 17-year-old boy playing fifa with your brother. His tight shirt highlighted his muscles, his face was grazed by a light stubble, and his deep brown eyes had an emotion in them you haven’t seen before. Eyes, in which you wanted to get lost, scanned your silhouette. He threw his arm around your shoulders. His touch was a burning sensation dancing on your skin.
You also weren’t the 8-year-old girl with pigtails who sat around just to spend time with them. “Well, you’ve changed since I last saw you.” "Yeah, Carlos, that was ten years ago.” He laughed, and you swore the same butterflies flew around your stomach, just as when you were a kid. Fuck. He still had the same hold on you.
Still the same fool after all.
You opened the front door to your parents’ house. His laugh echoed in the hallway as you took off your shoes. Carlos is here. “Y/N!! HELP ME!! He is cheating!” your brother shouted as you walked into the living room.
“I'm not cheating!!” Carlos mumbled, and your brother, who can’t handle losing, restarted the game. “WHY DID YOU DO THAT?” Carlos exclaimed. "MAYBE, ‘CAUSE YOU’RE CHEATING!” your brother yelled back, an evident smile on his lips. A throaty groan escaped the lips of both guys.
Their friendship was something you saw bloom into a close bond. Their arguments sounded just like the ones they had 10 years ago. And if it was a different day, maybe you would stay there and just watch them. However, your tired legs carried you to the kitchen.
From the fridge, you pulled out a bowl of fruits you cut up this morning. The laughter of those two man-children was still heard. One of them bringing nostalgia and some old, forgotten feelings back.You really haven't changed.
“Hey? You okay?” a small voice next to you asked. You didn’t even notice when he entered the kitchen. Shit, how and why did you zone out? Could’ve avoided him. Well, not him, but this conversation.
"Yeah, Carlos,” you mumbled out. He opened a drawer, looking for something. He grabbed a pack of popcorn, threw it into the microwave, and leant onto the cold kitchen counter behind him.
A buttery smell hits your nose pretty quickly. Not sure if it was because of that, but the awkward atmosphere shifted into a comfortable one.
It reminded you of the moments from your childhood and his teenage years. The raindrops bounced against the glass of the window. It calmed you down until you heard the microwave beeping and got a mini-heart attack.
“Can I have some?” you asked shyly. He didn’t answer; he just pulled out a second, smaller bowl. “Wanna go out golfing tomorrow?” he asked you as he handed you the popcorn, his voice barely above a whisper. You looked up at him from your bowl of fruits. “Just me, you, and your brother." “All right,” you smiled.
“Want some?” You pushed your bowl with the cut-up fruit in front of him. He grabbed a piece of an apple. “Delicious,” he moaned as he placed it on his tongue. You giggled at his antics. He really hasn’t changed. “From your garden, right? I remember this taste.” "How?" "Too good to forget."
He smiled and picked up the big bowl of popcorn. “Are you sure you wanna go golfing? It’s weird you’re not complaining about it-“  “Go away before I change my mind.”
You leaned into him as you laughed at his joke. His smell was intoxicating, you wish you could smell it all throughout your life. He placed his head on yours, and you swore you were in a dream.
“Carlos,” you spoke quietly, “you remember when we went golfing?” He smiled at the nice memory. If only you knew he remembered everything. Your hairstyle that you tried on for the first time, your outfit, the way your eyes sparkled when he said your swing was nice, the pinkish-red sunset you had to take pictures of.
He wished you’d take pictures of him, you didn’t. But, shh, you were taking pictures of him. Just in secret and for yourself.
“Yeah, of course I do. Our first date.” “Well-“ “Yeah, I lied to you, your brother was never invited.” You smiled. That was not new to you. Your brother was such a gossip. He could never keep a secret. This just confirmed it. “So you planned that! Carlos!” He just giggled, light blush covering his cheeks.
The way you said his name made him feel like he was the only person on earth. He kind of was in your eyes. “Now look at us, babe,” he said, and you sat up to take a sip of your coffee. This was your new favorite activity. Lying down on the outside couch, drinking coffee, and talking to your boyfriend, Carlos.
“Half a year went by fast, didn’t it?” you asked as you handed Carlos his mug. “Because we’re together,” he said, smiling at you. The same butterflies you had ten years ago and also six months ago appeared in your stomach.
“I love the coffee you make, it’s laced with something, isn’t it?” You smiled at his small remark. “Only with love.” “You’re so cheesy. I love you so much."
“We can split it.” Carlos grinned as he walked into the closet. There you were, sitting on the floor with suitcases all around you. “I don’t want to mess up your clothes,” you whined out, and Carlos sat down next to you. “You won’t mess up anything, just let me help you unpack,” he said with a smile.
You started pulling out clothes, and you both put them in the drawers or hung them up. Carlos had a bit of a judging era and gave opinions on nearly everything. His meanness went away when you picked up a white tennis skirt, the one you wore to your golf "date."
“Why haven’t you worn it since?” he asked, his voice laced with confusion. “I don’t know,” you answered and folded it up. His gasp made you look at him. “This is the dress you wore that time we went to try out the new ice cream shop!” He smiled at you and put the dress on a hanger.
“You remember that kind of stuff?” you asked him genuinely. Who would’ve thought he was this attentive? “Of course I do,” he placed a kiss on the top of your head. After spending at least three hours lost in the sea of clothes, you walked out of the closet.
Ecstatic—that’s what you both were. Finally moved in together. You already put some of your decorations in his living room. But the hallway was too empty for your liking.
“Carlos, can I hang some artwork here?” you called out to him in the kitchen. His head peeked around the corner. “Sure, let me help you.” He disappeared and then quickly reappeared with the tools needed for it. He hung up all of them.
“Thanks for letting me hang these up here.” You thanked him, your eyes looking to the ground. With his finger, he made you look up at him. “Please, it’s the bare minimum,” he whispered. That was definitely not that. He pulled you into a quick hug, then turned around to look at the art.
“They are really pretty. Did you paint these?” he asked he asked shyly. “Yeah, some of them last year and some a long time ago,” you laughed. “I like that one the most,” he giggles, and points to the one that was a portrait of him.
“Okay, that was painted last week,” you rolled your eyes. “You’re so in love with me, it’s funny." “Don’t act like you don’t love me too, Sainz.”
“YOU’VE DONE IT!” you yelled as you jumped into his arms. Your boyfriend just won a grand prix. A GRAND PRIX. At that moment, you were proud of him like you weren’t of anyone before. This was the first grand prix you attended, and he already made it so memorable.
“It was because of you! You’re my good luck charm!” he laughed. He smelled like champagne, sweat, and happiness, if that even made sense. He held you close, and in that moment, you felt you two were the only people on earth.
“My man just won a grand prix,” you whispered into his ear, calming him down a bit. You wish you could be stuck in this moment forever. And while celebrations were fun, coming home was something you both were looking forward to.
Carlos opened the front door to your house, your now colorful hallway greeting you both. He was happy you came with him, but if you didn’t, he knew you would be eagerly waiting for him at the end of the hallway. You left your suitcases there and just went to the kitchen to cook up something quick.
Like the gentleman that he is, he helped you cut up everything. Your laughs echoed through the whole house. You couldn’t stop laughing even when you were eating, his effect on you was noticeable. Carlos washed and dried the dishes with you. Ugh, such a gentleman.
You tiptoed to your shared bedroom, heading straight towards your bathroom. “Do you want a facemask too?” you asked as you felt his body behind you. He became shy all of a sudden. “I mean, if you want to and have one for me,” he stuttered over his words, and you laughed. You couldn’t comprehend how he was so shy at times.
The cold feeling from the mask hit your face. He put on his mask too, and smiled at you. “You’re so cute.” He loved watching you do your skincare routine, he was just so mesmerized by you. He sat on the edge of the bath, his eyes never leaving your face.
He was studying everything and making a mental note to himself about which stuff is for your eyes, lashes, lips... He knew you like his favorite song. His mask was pulled off way later than yours, and he headed straight towards your comfortable bed.
You ran after him almost instantly and plopped right next to him. Your breathing synced up, and you could feel a smile forming on your lips. You tilted your head to look at Carlos, only to find him already looking at you. Only smiles were exchanged; no words were needed.
You loved this. Comfortable silence with him. You never felt so relaxed when you didn’t know what to say. He threw a blanket over you two, and you wriggled out of it.
"Carlos, we have to change into pajamas." “No, we don’t have to, baby. Come cuddle.” He stretched his arms out towards you. Pulled under the covers again. “You’re lucky I love you,” you muttered out under your breath, and he giggled.
You both got comfortable pretty quickly. Now, no one could pull you out of here. “Good night, princess.” His lips tickled your forehead as they placed a quick kiss.
You heard the door opening. He was finally home. You ran down the hall and threw yourself around him. A little peck from you landed on his cheek, and he returned it. There was sadness on his face. Something you haven’t seen in a long time.
“What’s wrong?” you asked as you led him to the table where he had dinner waiting for him. His favorite food. “You ate already?” he asked when he noticed the absence of a second plate. Changing the conversation. Wow. So original.
“Carlos. Answer my question.” “I finished out of points.” He grunted as he sat down. You let out a heavy exhale and sat across from him. It could’ve been worse. “Don’t beat yourself up because of that. You’re a great driver; it just wasn’t your weekend.”
"Well, it hasn’t been my weekend for a long fuckin’ time.” He mumbled under his breath. Sometimes comforting him was like consoling a child. You didn’t know what to say and just watched him eat from his plate.
You hated when he was like this, because there was nothing you could do about it. Either he’d get over it or just be quiet for the whole day. You stood up from the table and walked slowly towards the kitchen.
You knew this wasn’t your fault, but it felt like that. You sat on the counter, looking out of the window. His footsteps echoed through the room. He carefully placed the plate in the sink, and his hands gripped your hips.
“Y/N,” he started his sentence, “I’m sorry.” You lifted your gaze to look at him. Your eyes were glossy, and that’s when he knew he fucked up. “It’s really not your fault, I shouldn’t be acting like this.” “It’s fine.” “No. It’s not.”
You knew it wasn’t fine. It tore your heart apart to see him in a shitty mood. He brought you into a hug. His cologne enveloped you, and you buried your head into his chest. His fingers played with your hair as he stroked your head.
A tear fell onto his hand when he pinched your cheek. You wanted to speak up, but you couldn’t find your voice. Carlos was one of the people you wanted only the best for.
“Please,“ you finally spoke up, “just talk to me when you’re feeling bad. I swear it’s better for us both.” He exhaled and looked down at you. “You should’ve told me sooner,” he whispered. “I shouldn’t have to tell you that,” you thought as you wriggled out of his hug.
“Come on! We’re gonna be late!” he yelled out as you walked out of the bedroom. His eyes scanned your body. “Oh. We can stay home if you want,” he changed his mind pretty quickly. You had to pull out the new dark red dress for this occasion.
Today was your 3rd anniversary, and Carlos, the great boyfriend that he is, booked a table in the most expensive restaurant. You ushered him into the car. You weren’t running late, but you were on the edge of that.
Quiet, calming music from the radio filled your ears. The ride wasn’t supposed to be long. It felt like that, though. You were looking out of the window, your eyes scanning the new buildings you hadn’t seen yet. Carlos’ hand landed on your thigh. That gave you a weird feeling of comfort.
But it didn’t last long as he parked his car. He got out of the car and then ran around it to open your door. You blushed at the act and placed your hand in his. “Let’s go, ma’am,” he said, and you laughed. You got through the reception, and the waiter took you to your table.
Carlos really took his time with this. The table overlooked the city of Madrid, with all of the city lights shining brightly. It looked beautiful. He pulled out your chair for you, and you giggled. “So what can I get for you?” the waiter asked as you both sat down.
“Just a non-alcoholic beer for me and a bottle of wine for my lady. What kind do you want?” he asked. He knew which one you always ordered, but he didn’t want to risk getting something you wouldn’t drink.
“Red wine. Please.” You smiled and opened the menu. “Is that all for the drinks?” he asked, and you both nodded quietly. “I’ll let you pick out the food,” he turned around on his heel, strutting towards the bar.
Carlos smiled at you. His smile was something that warmed your heart every time. He grabbed your hand and drew small shapes with his thumb. He always knew how to comfort and calm you. You broke eye contact with him and admired the city, while he admired you.
The waiter came with the drinks and took your order. You ordered something simple, like always. You started eating together, and the conversation topics floated effortlessly. He was in the middle of telling a story about the crazy stuff he did with his cousins when his phone rang.
‘boss’ was the name that popped up on the screen, and you chuckled. “Hold on, I have to take this,” he said, walking away from the table. You continued eating.
Something was off when 20 minutes flew by and he wasn’t back. Finished the food. Still nothing. Drank enough wine. Nothing. Nearly an hour has passed, and still nothing?
You stood up and went towards the bar. “Hey, do you by any chance know where my boyfriend is?” you asked, completely desperate for an explanation. “He paid your bill and left,” the waiter behind the bar said with a calm expression.
You deeply exhaled and walked back to the table to grab your purse. You stormed out of there. What the fuck? Why didn’t he tell you anything? You were sitting there like a dumbass for a long time, waiting for him.
You called yourself an uber, and while the drive was awkward, it was definitely better than sitting in a car with Carlos. “Got stood up?” the man asked, his gaze focused on you in the mirror. “No, it’s complicated.”
“Relationships are complicated,” he laughed. At least that made you feel a bit better. Again, it wasn’t a long drive, so you were home relatively quickly. You walked into the hallway, which felt a bit more colorless than before. Your shoes came off quickly, and you threw yourself on the couch.
Defeated—that’s how you felt. A tear slid down your cheek.
You woke up in your bed next to Carlos. He probably carried you upstairs. He looked peaceful. So pretty. You hated that you loved him so much. How you could forgive him anything.
Your brain was fighting itself, you didn’t know what to do. Carlos was everything to you. First crush, love, relationship. But this really hurt. It was like he didn’t even care about anything. Your bed feels as hard as a rock now.
You couldn’t fall back asleep. Turning, flipping your pillow and blanket. You tried everything. Still up. Your brain was filled with Carlos. Did he not realize how much this would’ve hurt you? Work is important; you get that. But you couldn’t even get a heads-up that he was leaving?
You were mad and sad, and the tears you pushed back that evening came out. And they weren’t stopping anytime soon. Everything dawned on you all of a sudden. You grabbed onto your blanket and wiped your tears into it.
And you were 12 again, crying over a boy who didn’t like you back. Your heart shattered into a million tiny pieces, and you wished the man who was lying behind you would pick them up and glue them together. You fought the cry, which nearly came out of your throat, and reached for your phone to look at the time.
The phone brightened up the whole room, and you groaned. 4:55. Too soon. Apparently you weren’t the only one who was surprised by the brightness because the man next to you turned to face you. He was still sleeping. Thank god.
You didn’t want to deal with him this soon. You put the phone back on the nightstand and snuggled up under the covers. You felt his arms wrap around your waist. Somehow, his touch lost that warmth, and you felt goosebumps on your whole body.
You didn’t know what to do. Another round of tears rolled down your cheeks, and you never felt weaker. He had an effect on you. It used to be a positive one, but now you weren’t sure if you could continue with this.
Where was he? The question brewing in your mind. Yeah, he was supposed to be working. But it’s 10 p.m. Your stress levels were increasing by every second. You were starting to worry about him. The dinner on the counter had already been reheated 15 times by now.
You sat down on the cold floor, staring at the ceiling. Your fingers fidgeted with the string of your sweatpants. Anything could’ve happened to Carlos, and you didn’t know. Your worries were cut short as a knock landed on the front door.
You shot up from the spot you sat on and ran towards the door. Your keys jingled as you tried to unlock the door as fast as possible. The handle probably left a dent in the wall from how fast you opened it.
And there he was. Carlos, with Charles by his side. You threw yourself into his arms, and he hugged you back. "Okay, Carlos, you’re home now. See you tomorrow!” Charles said carefully and slowly. He turned on his heel and walked rapidly back to his car.
As the front door closed, Carlos still didn’t let go of you. One close look at him and you could tell he’s drunk. You brought him to the kitchen and sat him down on a bar stool. “Come on. Eat. Or you’ll have a massive hangover.”
He ate slowly, talking about his evening. You stood on the other end of the counter, looking at him like you were a disappointed mother. Arms crossed on your chest gave you a feeling of security and comfort. Something you needed right now. As he was finishing his food, you decided to speak up about something you both dreaded to mention.
“Why did you go to the bar? You told me you were gonna come home immediately after work.” He looked up at you, like he was a deer in the headlights. “I just wanted to go out with the guys after a tough day,” he said, like he couldn’t figure out why you were mad. You just exhaled, not saying anything. But your stare spoke a million words.
“Don’t tell me you’re mad because of that.” He spoke as he handed you an empty plate. You bit into your bottom lip and turned away from him—towards the sink. You turned on the water, so it flowed slowly as you washed his and your plate, which had been in the sink for the past three hours. Carlos scoffed.
“You got so boring. What happened to you?” You ignored his drunken indiscretions and continued scrubbing the plates. He sat in silence, at least until the water flow stopped. You grabbed the closest dishcloth, not wanting to turn to see him. There were tears in your eyes, threatening to spill out of your eyes at any second now.
“You know, Y/N,” he started, “you changed. You aren’t yourself. You used to be so fun.” You swore you felt like someone had stabbed you right there, and you were starting to bleed out. Maybe past or sober Carlos would help you, but this one just wanted to put another knife through you.
“It’s like you don’t even care about my feelings, I never have fun anymore.” And there it was. The tears spilled from your eyes like a waterfall, and if your heart didn’t break before, now it definitely has.
“I can’t even have fun anymore.” He mumbled and walked out of the kitchen. A sob escaped your lips, and the salty drops covered the newly polished plates. You kept polishing them over and over again, breaking down even more in the process. That job was like a never-ending one.
His hurtful words were on repeat in your head, and you swore your knees started giving out. More sobs filled the room, but you stopped crying once you heard faint footsteps.
“Are you coming to bed or are you gonna keep polishing those dumb plates?” His tone was harsh, something you had never heard before. “I don’t want to sleep next to you tonight.” You whispered into the air.
“Night.” He grunted and turned off the lights in the hallway. You finally put the plates in their place.
“Second time you’re falling asleep on the couch.” You thought to yourself as you sat down. You felt like crying again, but there was nothing that could come out.
You reached for the blanket on the other end of the couch and found a comfortable position. What else could you think of other than your boyfriend?
You knew he was drunk. He probably didn’t mean it. You’ve done some shitty things while you were drunk too. But what if it wasn’t just the alcohol in his blood? Were you boring? Did you change? Were you good enough for Carlos?
A singular tear fell on the pillow. You wish you could just fall asleep and not think about Carlos for once. It helped you fall asleep most of the time, but it was also your greatest enemy in times like these. You hugged yourself, but nothing could generate the warmth Carlos hugged you with. A sob left your mouth.
“Can’t fall asleep. Please, Y/N,” Carlos’ voice scared you. “Please,” he begged again, and you stood up. He let you lead the way, slowly walking behind you. You threw yourself into your shared bed.
He just sat down on the edge. You looked at him for a second before turning on your other side and falling asleep. Carlos just sat there, looking out of the window. He finally laid down next to you, falling asleep nearly immediately with the familiar body right next to him.
Family dinners. Something you both hated and looked forward to. Your mom handed you plates, then just ushered you out of the kitchen to the backyard. Your cousins and you neatly set the table, talking about stuff that has happened since you last saw each other.
You felt like a kid again. Everyone finally sat down and started eating. You felt terrible, and your face probably showed it because your aunt asked the thing you did not want to hear.
“Where’s your boyfriend?” she asked genuinely, and you just shrugged. You were defeated. You always attended his family events, and he couldn’t even come on time to yours? You swallowed a lump in your throat.
“Probably at work,” you said, not even looking up from your plate. “Huh. Asshole.” Hearing your brother mutter out that about his friend shocked you. Your mom nodded, and your dad just sighed.
An uncomfortable silence fell over the table. You preferred this over them calling you out. But it’s a family dinner, after all. “I know you love him, Y/N, but that age gap isn’t great,” your cousin proclaimed.
“He isn’t treating you right; younger you would never take that disrespect.” Another cousin agreed with her. You finally looked up to see the whole table staring at you. You didn’t know what to say. Maybe because they were right.
“You could’ve spent your twenties partying, and you’re with that guy.” Your dad spoke up. And you knew it was bad when he commented on it.
You exhaled deeply, opened your mouth to talk, and your brother already had his head in his hands. It’s like he was getting ready for whatever you were going to say.
“You love to just hate on everyone and everything, right?” Every pair of eyes looked away from you. Your phone vibrated in your lap, and you grabbed it. “I’m in front of the house.” You stood up from the table and became the center of attention once again.
“You don’t know him that well! You just love to judge everyone!” you shouted as you slid-opened the glass door. “I know him too well!” your brother yelled out. You slammed the door and ran up to your room.
“Give me 5 mins” you typed out with tears in your eyes. For those 5 minutes, you just sat on your old bed, trying to calm yourself down. Your feet swiftly carried you downstairs.
As you were about to make a turn for the door, you saw Carlos sitting in the backyard, laughing with everybody. You walked outside, wrapping your arms around his neck.
“I let your boyfriend in, if you don’t mind,” your brother joked, making everyone laugh. Are you going absolutely fucking crazy? Just a few minutes ago, they hated him, and now they are making it seem like you had a problem with him.
You swore you were going to go insane, but you just sat down, smiling at your family. It’s fine. Everything will be fine. But as the night went on, it didn’t feel like that.
He was ignoring every ounce of affection you gave him. Acting like you didn’t exist. And now you regret defending him so much.
You were in the middle of the unspoken routine you and Carlos adapted during the last few days after a big fight. You cleaned up after dinner while he read emails and work-related stuff.
He fell asleep because his soft snores filled the entirety of the living room. You grinned, and your heart broke at a thought that popped up in your head. You sat on the bar stool, and it’s like he felt like you were watching him because he woke up and opened up his book, continuing with his work.
Observing him was more fun when you two weren’t mad at each other. That isn’t the case today. He 'studied‘ the whole book, and you just sat there until he closed and placed it on the coffee table. You were internally fighting yourself.
Was this a good idea? Is it going to be absolutely worthless? You couldn’t even predict how you were going to act; how could you know how he was going to react? A little voice spoke quietly in your head. It’s going to be better. Let it go. You were walking towards the hallway when his deep voice surprised you.
“Are you not even going to say anything?” All the pent-up anger made its way to the surface. “You should say something!” you spat out, putting the emphasis on you. He looked down.
“Are you really making yourself the victim?” you continued. “What are you talking about?” he asked, not realizing you were one dumb question away from breaking down.
“YOU ARE THE ONE WHO IS RUINING THIS,” you strutted towards the couch, “and you’re not even realizing it.” He stayed quiet, waiting for whatever you had to say next.
“You used to actually care about me.” You shed a tear, and he stood up to hug you. But you just pushed him away. “Don’t pull that shit, Carlos.” He exhaled and sat down.
“I gave you everything!” you shouted. “All my attention, all my time, all my energy—I gave it all! And you did nothing with it!” You took a deep breath and looked into his eyes. Something in them screamed: When will she finally calm down? And that angered you even more.
“I don’t know shit about your life anymore! You don’t tell me anything! I have no idea how Ferrari is doing or what happened in the paddock. If you can’t even share the most basic information, how the fuck can we function as a couple?” You asked a rhetorical question. You didn’t want him to answer.
“It’s like my love and me are just extra weight on your shoulders. Is my affection annoying? Huh?” He looked up at you. You loved his deep brown eyes, but now you they were just making you angrier.
“I never knew you felt like that." “Yeah, of course you never know. It’s like you’re blind. Or maybe you just don’t fucking care! So stop acting like you do.” His clueless eyes scanned your hurt face. Maybe he actually didn’t know. But it’s not like that was an excuse.
He deeply hurt you, and there was no apologizing he could do; that was enough. “Please let me make it up to you,” he pleaded, his voice cracking nearly every word. “I swear, I didn’t mean it.” You burst into tears.
“No. Just let me end this.” Words rushed out of your mouth before you broke into another sob. A tear rolled down his cheek. This just broke your heart more. “You wouldn’t...” he said quietly.
“I would,” you looked him in the eyes, “and that’s what I’m doing right now.” “We’re done?” he asked like a little boy. “Yeah, Carlos. I’ll pick up my stuff later." You said as you walked through the hallway. The only thing you picked up were your keys.
You smashed-closed the front door and sat in your car. You couldn’t bring yourself to drive away. Leaving all the memories behind you. Most importantly, the 7-year-old you who would swear he was your soulmate. Maybe it just wasn’t meant to be.
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thefallennightmare · 4 months
Text
Just Pretend-nineteen
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*gif created by me. feel free to use, simply give credit*
Parings: Noah Sebastian x Musician! Reader
Warnings/Tropes: language, angst, fluff, smut, star-crossed lovers, right person/wrong time, cheating, talks of mental abuse.
Summary: “I can wait for years, heaven knows I’m not getting over you.” A story about two star-crossed lovers, that always find their way back because their souls are entwined. The universe desperately attempts to bring them together, no matter what the cost.
Authors Note: I realized today that Sarah and I have been working on this story for almost TWO MONTHS. Holy shit. Talk about a slow burn! I don't think it's ever taken me this long to write an active story. Also, there are a few sentences in Greek and Italian in this chapter. You can find the translations at the end of the chapter.
Collaborating With: @thescarlettvvitch(better give her all the love as well)
Tags: @thescarlettvvitch @ozwriterchick @waake-meee-up @notingridslurkaccount @niicoleleigh @sammyjoeee @xxrainstorm @dominuslunae @notmaddihealy @malice-ov-mercy @crimson-calligraphyx @iknownothingpeople @writethrough @thebadchic @blackveilomens Claudia on Tumblr @tobe-written @blacksoul-27 @loeytuan98 @loverofagoodbeard @comfortcharactercraze @lma1986 @plutonikchaos1 @spicywhenspeaking @lyschko666 @somewhere-diamond @hi-fancy-seeing-you-here @koskeepsake @bngurngheart @shilohrosechicken @emzandthevoid @casangel1986 @qualityvoidcollectorsblog @myownthoughts12 @jilliemiw86 @bellaboo967 @halloweenaesthetic
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NOAH
My knee bounced in a tangent along with the clock on the wall behind Dr. Poulos as she tilted her head towards me, waiting for my answer. 
“I’m sorry, what was the question?” I blinked slowly. 
She gave me a small smile, tapping her pen on her notebook; something I’ve realized she did when she was ready to ask me a hard-hitting question. 
“How have the panic attacks been?” Dr. Poulos wondered. 
“Uh,” I rubbed my jaw. “It’s been better, I suppose. I still feel them starting every once in a while but my friends have been great at helping me through them.” 
“That’s great,” she smiled. “I’m glad to hear that. I know it was a problem for you from our first session.” 
“Yeah, I’ve come to realize there were a few aspects of my life that hindered me more than helped me.” 
Dr. Poulos’ brows raised. “Like what?” 
“Up until recently, I would drink; a lot. And smoke weed every so often. People say it’s the lesser of the drugs but it affected me in such a way that I didn’t like the man I saw in the mirror. Same with the alcohol. So, I’ve decided to become sober.” 
That spread a wider smile on her face. “I’m proud of you, Noah. It’s not an easy thing to overcome but to see how determined you are makes me very happy.” 
I ran my hands over my thighs while standing up straighter on the couch; her positive praise made my heart beat a bit faster. 
“I just want to be the healthiest I can be. Your body is a temple, ya know? It’s only been a few weeks but I can already tell a difference in the way I sing.” 
“That’s exceptional, Noah. I’m happy to hear that. It’ll help the course of your life. But I must ask, do you feel it’ll leave a part of you open and willing to accept the love you think you deserve?” 
I pursed my lips. “What do you mean?” 
“Well, as you mentioned previously, it sounds like Y/N has had some complicated relations with a man who was in a state of addiction. Do you feel that maybe, a part of your being sober can help you leave that part finally open? Allow you to see that you can be loved.” 
When I remained silent, letting her words rest in my mind, Dr. Poulos shut her notebook and set it on the table between us; next to one of those sand zen garden things. 
“What you're doing with Bailey and hiding your true feelings for Y/N doesn't seem to be helping, right?” 
I shook my head with a long sigh. “I never meant for things to go this far.” 
Dr. Poulos leaned forward to rest her elbows on her knees, stippling her fingers. 
“Has Y/N ever given you a reason to doubt the things you say to her?” 
“No. Never,” I answered without missing a beat. 
“Then what’s stopping you from telling her how you feel?” She brushed a strand of brown-graying hair from her eyes. 
With Dr. Poulos’ words replaying in my mind, I sat down on the steps of her office while clicking on Bailey’s contact name on my phone. As it rang, I tapped my fingers on my knee to drum a random beat. 
“Hey, it’s Bailey. Leave me a message!’
Cursing to myself, I wished that she had answered because I didn’t want to do this with her voicemail but I had no other option. This needed to be done. 
“Bailey, it’s me- Noah,” I sighed while pinching my eyes shut. “Listen, I didn’t want to do this over text or on your voicemail. But I thought it best you hear me say this. I wanted to discuss it with you the other day but shit came up.” 
My eyes watched as a few people walked past on the sidewalk in front of me. 
“Look, I never wanted to hurt you, you’re a nice girl but this-us-isn’t working for me. I’m-I’m sorry if this hurts you. Truly. I’m not good at words all the time but I will say that I wish you the best and I hope you have a nice life.” 
After hanging up, I could physically feel the weight lift off my shoulders and heart. Breathing was easier and lighter, so with this newfound feeling, I quickly dialed Y/N’s number. 
“Mochi!” 
I could hear the smile in her voice.
“Hi, angel. Are you busy?” I asked while rising from the steps to walk a few steps to my car that was parked in the street. 
“I’m walking into an appointment right now. Can I call you later?”
Ignoring the way my heart dropped, I started my car and sat there for a moment. 
“Of course. I’ll be in the studio but I’ll always answer for you.” My hand ran over the steering wheel. 
“So sweet,” Y/N chuckled and my stomach fluttered. “There’s a reason why I gave you that nickname.” 
We quickly said our goodbyes and my mind was filled with the heavy conversation I needed to have with Y/N. I didn’t even realize the familiar figure bounding up the steps of the same office I left mere minutes ago, her yellow sundress flowing in the wind.
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READER
My eyes were trained on the small sand zen garden on Dr. Poulos’ table as she tapped her pen against the notebook in her lap. The clock ticked annoyingly loudly behind her, almost mocking me as I continued to leave her question unanswered. 
“Y/N,” Dr. Poulos’s voice was firm, breaking me from my trance. “You mentioned your mother contacted you the other day?” 
I played with the hem of my yellow sundress. “Uh, yeah. She doesn't do it often but when she does, she really lets her feelings known.” 
“And what are those feelings?” 
“The same bullshit. My mom doesn’t agree with the lifestyle I’ve chosen. She thinks it's a waste of time,” I shrugged as if it wasn’t a big deal. “It’s who she is. Being Greek, I was raised to have large but realistic dreams. My father on the other hand wanted and still wants me to follow my heart, he wants me to go after what I want, what I need. There’s a line between both of them.”
“You know,” Dr. Poulos tucked a strand of her brown-graying hair behind her ear. “There’s a study that says insecure attachment styles can develop as a result of poor parenting. Research indicates that attachment in childhood affects the development of familial, social, and romantic relationships later in life. Do you feel this has deeply affected or influenced your relationships? 
I pursed my lips. “What do you mean?” 
“I mean, you’ve had a pattern of falling for men who aren't good for you yet believing they are real love when you know subconsciously you deserve better.” 
“Maybe,” the word trailed off my lips, uncertainty weighing heavy on my heart. 
Dr. Poulos hummed, crossing one leg over the other. “It sounds that way, doesn’t it? Are you running from Noah because you’re afraid you’ll disappoint him? Afraid he’ll do what your mother often does? You’ve seen the way your parent's marriage was like growing up, that has to be a hindering factor, doesn't it? 
My jaw ticked. “My mother was unfair to my father. I’d never do that or treat anyone that way.” 
“I know you won’t, Y/N. You know it yourself, deep down in your heart,” she patted a hand over her own heart. “Because from what you told me about Noah, I don’t believe that he would act the way your mother has. You won’t disappoint him. And he doesn’t want to do that to you either.” 
I shook my head widely. “He’s with someone else so it doesn't even matter.” 
A small smile lifted at the corner of her lips. “Quite the contrary, Y/N. You said it earlier you wanted to tell him the truth. He isn’t your mother and again, from what you’ve told me it sounds like you both may want the same things. You’re just not trusting yourself. You’re relying on your trauma and issues with your mother to get in the way.” 
“Wow, nice observation,” I snorted. “How am I supposed to fix that?” 
Dr. Poulos ignored my snarky attitude. “If your mother has been unreliable, then you may need to lean on other people who are for support. Socializing with friends and learning to be vulnerable with others can help increase emotional connection.” 
“Malcolm and Chase are reliable,” I stated. 
“It sounds like it, from what you’ve told me,” she nodded. “There’s also Noah. His support can take some time to develop but having stable relationships with others can be part of healing. And most of all, self-care.” 
I left therapy with a hopeful heart and bright smile. Dr. Poulos always knew what I needed to hear as much as I tried to fight it. Peaking down at my phone, my pulse quickened when I noticed a missed text from Noah.
Mochi 🍡: New episode of Attack on Titan dropped. I can pick up lunch. Your place or mine?
Giggling, I typed out my response, not letting anything ruin this euphoric high I felt.
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NOAH
I stood outside Y/N’s front door, shaking out the nerves, and knocked on it. I had a bag of take-out food in my hand, something she requested from her favorite burrito place. 
“Hi,” she smiled while letting me in. “Did you remember the Dr. Pepper?” 
I chuckled while holding up the cup. “Light ice.” 
As we set out the food on the table in their dining room, I motioned towards the various easels and splattered pain on the carpet. “Studio?” 
“Yeah,” Y/N gave a sheepish smile. The lighting in here is better than my bedroom; although not by much.” 
I took in the various paintings of abstract lines and colors, some of random landscapes, and one of Salem. 
“These are really good, angel.” 
“I’m glad I decided to do this. Painting has been a great way to escape from reality, even for a little bit,” she took a bite of her burrito. “Oh, extra guac? How’d you know?” 
I shrugged. “I just do.”
We ate in silence for the next few long moments and as much as I tried to quiet the loud voices in my mind that screamed at me to tell Y/N the truth right now, it was extremely difficult. 
My eyes took in the glimmer of her bracelet as she reached for the chips and I couldn't stop the smile that spread wide to my lips. Y/N was still wearing the jewelry I bought her and it made me feel proud. 
“Where’s Chase and Malcolm?” I asked, noticing the quiet.
Y/N took a large drink of her soda, reveling in the taste. “Hiking. They left earlier this morning and typically don’t come back till later. So I have the place to myself.”
Just as I was about to speak, a persistent knock sounded on the front door, and she turned towards it with a confused stare. 
“Expecting anyone?” 
She shook her head. “Nope. Probably someone selling Girl Scout cookies.” 
“If they have Thin Mints, I’ll take four boxes,” I called after Y/N. 
Her laugh echoed throughout the room but soon seized when she opened the door. I noticed the way her body went rigid and I slowly rose in time to see a tall but petite brunette all but push her way inside. 
“Hi, koukla. I would have texted or called but it seems like you have an issue with checking your phone,” the lady peered around the space, a sour look on her lips. 
“Mo-mom? What are you doing here?” 
Shit. 
I knew there was a history with Y/N’s mom but never knew how deep it ran. 
“I was in town and thought to surprise you. Since you never talk to me anymore,” her mom tsked. 
Finally, her eyes landed on me, standing in the threshold of the living room and dining room; gaze hardening. 
“Who’s this?” She asked Y/N. 
Internally I snorted at how she asked Y/N rather than asking me. 
“I’m Noah,” I introduced myself while brushing away the strands from my face. 
Her mom hummed before nodding towards the back end of the house. “Give me and my daughter some privacy.” 
“Mom!” Y/N seethed. 
Noticing how the tension shifted, I gave Y/N a soft smile. “It’s alright. I’ll go say hi to Salem.” 
With my back to them, I walked down the hall and heard her mom mutter something in Greek. 
“Giatí échei makriá malliá?” 
“Eísai apísteftos,” Y/N responded in a stern voice. 
Sitting in the Y/N’s bedroom with Salem perched on my lap, I left the door wide open so I could listen in on the conversation. It may have been wrong to eavesdrop but something deep inside of me told me to be on edge, just in case.
“You should have called, Mom,” Y/N said. 
“You never return my calls.” 
“Gee, I wonder why. You exactly haven’t been that peachy the last few times we’ve talked.” I could hear the slight edge in Y/N’s voice. 
“I thought I’d told you I don’t appreciate the way you speak to me.” 
“It’s a two-way street, Mom. You get what you give.” 
Salem purred loudly in my lap and I continued to scratch him in the spot I knew he loved; between his ears. 
“I’ve always hated when your father used that line,” her mother sighed. 
Someone was pacing, their footsteps echoing loudly down the hall, and I peered down at Salem. 
“Your mom seems pretty upset right now,” I frowned at the feline. 
His bright green eyes stared back at me, simply demanding one thing silently; more pets to which I obliged. 
“Have you been to the doctor lately?” 
“Since when do you care, Mom? You never ask how I’m doing.” 
Salem jumped off of me when I slowly rose to my feet, deciding that I needed to be closer to Y/N, just in case. 
“I know how bad Endometriosis affects you, Y/N. I’m simply wondering.” 
I could almost hear Y/N roll her eyes as I neared the end of the hallway, out of sight but could still see just enough. Y/N stood with her hands on her hips while her mom sat comfortably on the couch. 
“I’m fine.” Y/N kept her answers short. 
Her mother pursed her lips. “And how’s the career?” 
Now it was my turn to roll my eyes at the way she said career. 
Y/N snorted. “Please, like you give a shit.” 
“Watch your language!” 
“You’ve never supported me with my music. Hell, with any of my dreams. So don’t start acting like you give a shit now. 
Her mom rose to her feet, narrowing her gaze. “That’s not true. I only want what’s best for you, Y/N. You don’t want to end up like your father and be stuck.” 
“He wasn’t stuck,” Y/N scoffed while clenching her fists. 
Her mother clicked her tongue while brushing away Y/N’s hair from her face. “Yes, sweetie, he was. And I’m telling you, no man will want to deal with someone that’s always on the road. What man is going to wait around or understand this lifestyle? What future are you gonna have?”
My jaw clenched at hearing those words because I knew it wasn’t true. There was a man who wanted Y/N; me. I would wait for years if I had to. Whenever she was ready, I’d be here. 
But hearing how her mom talked to her made me realize that there was a reason why Y/N never spoke of her and why she was so apprehensive of any future relationship. 
“We’re not talking about this,” Y/N stepped away from her mom to stand on the other end of the couch, giving more space between them. 
“Once again, you’re avoiding a tough subject. I didn’t raise you this way,” her mother chastised. 
Y/N’s jaw dropped. “Raised me? Are you fucking kidding me? You barely were home, too busy focusing on your career leaving Dad home to raise me!” 
I smirked at hearing Y/N mock her mother in how she said career moments before. 
“Your father was always your favorite. But it was me you stayed with after the divorce!” Her mother's voice was raised. 
Fearing this would end in such a bad way, I pulled my phone to send a text to Chase. 
Me: Y/N’s mom is here and I’m afraid shit is about to hit the fan. What should I do?
His response came almost immediately. 
Chase: Fuck. Whatever you do, Noah. Don’t leave. Stay until we get there. Every time her mom either contacts her or shows up, Y/N goes into a dark place. Malcolm and I are leaving right now and should be back in an hour.
I swallowed thickly as my stomach dropped. If the guys were worried about Y/N’s mom being here, it could only mean one thing. 
Disaster. 
“I stayed with you because you made me feel guilty!” Y/N choked on a sob. “For years I wondered why I didn’t feel a connection with you so I thought staying with you would bring us closer. But instead, you dropped the you’re adopted bomb on me; on my birthday!”
Her mother had the audacity to shrug. 
“You probably would have found out eventually. I simply sped up the process.” 
Y/N shook her head. “You’re unbelievable.” 
“Because I tell the truth? You think people are going to stay with you with the lifestyle you’ve chosen?” 
“Oh, gods, we’re back on this again?” Y/N ran a hand through her hair. “I have a lot of people that support me.” 
 “Who? Your friend?” Her mom pointed a firm finger towards the hallway where I was still hiding around the corner. “Do you think he is going to wait around?” 
For years if I have to. 
“No. No one will, Y/N. You’re like your father with these pipe dreams.” 
“Pipe dreams? I didn’t realize wanting a family was a pipe dream,” Y/N spat. 
Her mother gave her a somber smile, clicking her teeth. “Kouklamou, I thought we talked about this. You can’t have a family, not the traditional way anyway. You need to realize that no man is going to want to go through all that trouble to have a child. It’s not worth it.” 
Y/N and I both flinched at the same time, those words almost verbatim with what Trey used to say to her. There I stood, my fists clenched by my sides, I rolled my shoulders back, glaring towards the petite brunette with dark eyes. 
I was feeling triggered while I observed this entire thing; it felt intrusive at first but now feels like I’m behind fifty feet of glass.
It made sense now, why this loving bond between Y/N and I was inaccessible. In this mode, I had to take great care not to damage these bonds of love, this relationship, this friendship, and this woman in front of me, who very early on became everything to my heart and soul. For in time, the glass disappeared and my love returned stronger.
I understood.
From my corner, I could see how the kitchen table had seen every emotion, from the sweet silent happiness of family times, when the only sound is contented enjoyment, to the rage that bursts out in the hard times; I understood. 
I refused to stand there and let it sour, not to her. Never to her.
Sobs played like a sad tune and I noticed Y/N was crying, hastily whipping away the tears. 
“I can’t believe I continue to let you in my life, knowing how you’ll treat me. Girls are supposed to look up to their mothers as idols, to learn from them how to be mothers. But you’ve shown me how not to treat my kids in the future.” 
“We’ve talked about this, Y/N. The chances of you becoming a mother are not in the cards for you. Neither is this musical career. You need to face reality.”
Fuck this. 
As I stepped into view of them, Y/N pointed to the front door. “I don’t need you to come in here and tell me how to run my life, I’m done with this.” 
“Y/n-.” 
“You heard her,” I spoke while standing next to Y/N, immediately wrapping my arm around her shoulder to pull her into my chest. 
My heart broke at how quickly she grasped onto my shirt, not wanting me to let her go. 
“Excuse me? This is a private matter between my daughter and me. This doesn't concern you,” her mom’s eyes sliced into me. 
“It does. Because it’s Y/N.” 
Her mom’s gaze bounced between the two of us, almost waiting for Y/N to object to my words, but instead, she stood firm, sniffing away her tears. 
“You need to leave.” 
With one final glare, Y/N’s mom snatched her purse off the couch while muttering something Greek under her breath before she slammed the door behind her; all the negative energy leaving in waves. 
“Y/N,” I tried to make her look at me but she kept her head cast down. 
“I can’t, Noah,” she cried. 
I lifted her chin with a firm finger and sucked in a breath as broken, bloodshot eyes stared back at me. 
“Don’t ever hide from me, angel. You know that.” 
Y/N kept her gaze firm on my face. “She does this every time. I don’t know why I continue to let her. I’m just a girl who wants her mother's love, is that so wrong?” 
“Angel,” I murmured while pulling her into my embrace, brushing a kiss across her forehead. 
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NOAH
My fingers drummed against the marble counter in front of me while Davis set out various ingredients. We were currently streaming the two of us cooking BLTs, something for the fans to enjoy and watch. I was reading some of the comments, smiling at a few then cringing at some others. 
Davis handed me a block of cheese. “Cut this up for me, would ya?” 
With it in one hand, I playfully spit on my hand before giving it a nice smack. 
“Hm, imagining that someone's ass?” He smirked under his breath. 
I gave him a light shove. “Fuck off.” 
We spent the next long while goofing off and having fun for the stream. It was nice to let my mind focus on something else besides Y/N and her mom. I spent the rest of the night at her place, holding her in my arms as she cried herself to sleep. The familiar scent of her lingered on me as I tucked her softly in her bed. Before I walked out of her house, I ran into Chase and Malcolm, whose parting words stuck with me all day.
“She needs you more than she’ll admit. It may not seem like it but she does.” 
Y/N texted me this morning to thank me for being there for her and say that if she went M.I.A for a while today, it’s only because Hollow Souls were in the studio recording. I didn't ask how she was feeling after the surprise visit from her mom. Y/N would tell me, if she wanted to, when she was ready.
“Alright, let’s read some comments,” Davis suggested as we finished up the cook-off; me winning.
He held Max in his hands, every so often giving him kisses. As I read a few comments out loud and responded, the dog practically begged me for attention when a familiar username appeared on the screen. 
Y/NHollowSouls: Noah Sebastian, I swear to Hades himself. You kiss Max right now or I’ll come over there and kick your ass.
I laughed while shaking my head. “Alright, Max. Come here! Let me give you some love.” 
I scratched the dog's ear while leaving a soft kiss on his nose then looked back to the computer screen to see Y/N leave another comment. 
Y/NHollowSouls: Good, that’s better. Now I need to taste this famous BLT that won. 
“Then get your ass over here. Bring some coconut water because Noah drank the last one,” Davis said once he read the comment. 
My heart began to beat widely in my chest at the thought of seeing Y/N again. 
Y/NHollowSouls: fuck yes. Noah, have that sandwich ready for me.
We ended the stream shortly after that but my eyes lingered on the black screen for a long moment. Davis immediately picked up on my quiet mood and knocked on the countertop.
“Noah?” 
My name was white noise, still staring at zoning out in front of me. 
“Earth to Noah! Come in Herc! Come in Herc!” 
“What?” My eyes snapped over to Davis, finally breaking out of my trance. 
“What I thought.” He smirks before getting serious. “Are you alright?” 
I gave a weak smile towards Davis. “Yeah. I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be?” 
He motioned towards the laptop. “I know you’re not actually fine right now but-.” 
I ran a hand over my face, doing my best to keep my breathing calm and even. “I’ll be fine, I promise. It just fucking hurts.” 
Davis shifted on his feet, hesitation clear on his face. “Why? No disrespect to Y/N at all, you know I love her-we all do. But why did you choose to stay in touch? After all the hurt you’ve gone through.”
My vision was direct with his. “Because I’d rather have her from afar to make sure she’s alright than to not have her in my life at all. Besides, she’s going through a lot of shit, something no one should go through alone. I won’t let her.” 
A grin spread across his face and he nodded. “I knew it. I just wanted to hear you admit it. But you need to end this shit with Bailey.” 
“I already did.” 
“Fuck,” Davis’ eyes widened. “Finally. How did she take it?” 
I nervously rubbed the back of my neck. “That’s the thing, she didn’t answer. I left her a voicemail.” 
“A voicemail? Damn, do you think she got the message?” Davis wondered while be began cleaning up the mess. 
I, instead, began making another sandwich for Y/N, knowing she’d be here soon. “I fucking hope so. If not, then she’s probably testing me to see if I’d change my mind.” 
“But you won't, right?” 
I snorted. “Fat chance.”
Davis turned towards me, drying his hands on a towel. “So you broke up with Bailey. What’s the next step with Y/N?” 
“I need to talk to her first. There’s a lot we need to talk about,” I said while pulling out a cold can of Dr. Pepper from the fridge. 
“Hey, that’s the last one,” he exclaimed. 
I merely shrugged while setting a place at the kitchen table for Y/N. “It’s for Y/N.” 
Davis, as much as he tried to be upset, chuckled. “In all seriousness, Noah, you know we’re here to support you. We have your back.” 
I smiled at one of my best friends. “I know.” 
Just then a knock sounded on the front door and before Davis could answer it, I quickly closed the short distance and opened it with a smile; only for it to drop seeing Y/N standing on the other side with a frown. 
“What’s wrong?” I questioned while allowing her to step inside and led her to Davis’ kitchen. 
“Chase’s birthday is on Friday and the venue I booked for it just canceled on me. Something about a pipe bursting and the room is flooded,” she exasperated while falling into the chair at the table. 
“What are you going to do?” I questioned while sitting across from her. 
Davis joined us at the table, taking the coconut water from Y/N with a small smile. 
“Thankfully since they have to cancel, I get my deposit back but Malcolm is freaking out,” she waved her phone around. “We have two days to figure out somewhere new for this surprise party.” 
“You can have it at my place,” I suggested. 
Y/N took a long drink of her soda. “Are you sure? Don’t you think you should talk with the rest of the guys first?” 
I snatched a chip off her plate and shrugged. “They won’t mind.” 
“Sei un tesoro, mochi,” she patted my cheek. 
Davis choked on his drink and my eyes snapped over to him. “I don’t want to hear it!” 
He held up his hands. “I didn’t hear anything.”
Y/N smirked before taking the first bite of her sandwich and groaned. “Oh shit, this is good. No wonder you won, Noah.” 
With a prideful smirk, I motioned to the rest of her plate. “Finish up. I’ll call the guys and have them meet here and we can plan Chase’s party.” 
At one point, Davis left to take Max for a walk, leaving Y/N and I alone. We sat silently and enjoyed the world around us. This has taken a lifetime to learn. It seemed only the old could sit next to one another, not say anything, and still feel content. The young, brash, and impatient, must always break the silence. It’s a waste, for silence is pure. Silence is holy. It draws people together because only those who are comfortable with each other can sit without speaking. This is the great paradox.
“Oh, I never noticed the great view Davis has,” Y/N mused while pushing away her empty plate. 
Realizing it was almost time for the sun to set, I quickly cleaned up for her and motioned towards the back door. 
“Let’s go sit outside for a bit, yeah?” I suggested. 
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READER
Noah and I sat comfortably on the patio bench, a blanket draped over both of our legs as we stared out at the vast greens of Davis’ backyard. The sky was painted in bright oranges with hints of pink and purple. Silently, I thought to myself that I should have brought my art supplies, noting this would be a beautiful experience to paint. 
The silence between Noah and I was comforting, something you don’t find all that often. People always needed to talk rather than just listen to the world around them. The way the birds chirped, the faint noises of evening traffic, or the sound of the wind as it blew a chilly breeze. 
“Angel?” 
I hummed while looking over towards Noah. 
He rubbed the back of his neck. “Is there-I don’t know-anything you really want besides music right now?”
“I want a studio, with giant canvas’, paint; just an art studio galore! I’ve gotten into the hobby and love it,” I answered with a bright smile. “I was even thinking of using some of my art for the album artwork. Just playing with ideas.”
Noah’s smile matched mine as he let his hair loose from the hair tie, letting it fall to his shoulders in waves. “I love that you found something else you’re so passionate about, angel.”
“I love painting. I really do,” I leaned farther back against the couch and rested my head against it. 
“So paint. You should do whatever your heart desires, Y/N.” 
“Thank you, mochi” I nudged him. 
Noah rested his head against the couch, inches away from mine as another thought came to mind. 
“You know,” I started with a long sigh. “When I was a kid, I would have given anything to be exactly like everybody else” 
“You wanted to be petty and dishonest?“ He joked.
“Not everyone is like that,” I defended with a shake of my head. 
“Yes they are,” Noah retorted back. “But not you. You’re not like that.” 
This had me sitting up straighter, Noah following me. “How do you know what I’m like?”
“I see you,” He shifted closer to me, hand brushing across my knee over the blanket. “I’ve seen you for a long time. You’re the most amazing person I’ve ever met”.
My heart beat widely in my chest, the noise deafening in my ears and I cleared my throat. 
“I think you are too. If I’m being honest, I think I’ve always sorta known that,” I admitted. 
“You know,” Noah’s hand rested on my knee. “With me bouncing between homes and couches growing up, I always thought I’d be alone. I’d never expected to have such an amazing group of friends.” 
“Sometimes maybe it’s better to be alone,” I shrugged while looking past his shoulder to an older couple watching in the neighborhood. 
“Why do you say that?”
I still kept my gaze off Noah, voice dropping low. “Nobody can hurt you.”
“Y/N,” Noah sighed and lifted my chin so I could meet his intense gaze. “I would never, ever hurt you.”
Those eyes. I’ve dreamed of those eyes almost every night since our first meeting so long ago. I won’t say I’m in love, not out loud, but I am. I came to terms with that a while ago. 
“I know, mochi,” I finally whispered. 
Noah’s thumb traced over my jawline. “I understand why it’s hard for you, Y/N. But know that when I’m with you, I don’t feel alone.”
That magnetic pull that always seemed to connect us with that invisible string made me lean closer to him needing his warmth to envelop me. 
“I’ve never had this instant connection with anyone. I know you understand it too,” he continued. 
With my continued silence, Noah sat up straighter but kept his grip on my chin. “Are you freaked out? Because not hearing you say anything kind of-.” 
“Noah- no,” I rested my hands on his chest. “I feel it too.” 
His hand grasped the back of my neck now, tilting my head up towards him, as we began to lead in closer, and when his warm breath fanned over my lips, I let my eyes flutter shut. 
“Hey guys-oh shit.” 
Quickly pushing away from Noah, I peered over my shoulder to see Malcolm leaning against the back door. 
“We’re all inside ready to talk about the party. Whenever you two decide to grace us,” Malcolm winked before slipping back inside. 
Clearing my throat, I let the realization sink in what Noah and I were about to do. He’s with Bailey and I was ready to kiss him. I’m not this kind of person but yet here I was again being caught between him and my conscious. Bailey, as intrusive as she was, didn’t deserve this. 
Noah tried to bring me back to him but I quickly stood up, giving us more space. 
“We can’t do this. Not again,” my hair shook widely around my shoulders. “It’s not fair to Bailey.” 
“I ended it.” 
I blinked. “Wha-Oh? You did?” 
As ecstatic as I was hearing this, I did my best to hide it. I didn’t want Noah to know inside I was jumping for fucking joy; like a kid on Christmas that received the toy they’d been wanting. 
Noah stood from the couch now, standing in front of me. “I think Bailey saw me as Noah on the big screen, not me the person and after everything at that dinner I just knew it was time.” 
“I’m-I’m sorry,” I stammered, not knowing what else to say. 
His brows furrowed. “Why? It wasn’t serious. There wasn’t that connection; like the one we have.” 
As my lips parted, it was Jesse now who interrupted us, taking a bite of the apple in his hand. “Are you guys coming or what?” 
Noah cursed while running a hand through his hair and I shakily pointed over his shoulder. 
“We should head inside. Talk about this party.” 
Not wanting to spend another second out here, afraid to finally give in to the thoughts that were screaming at me, I gently brushed past him to return inside.
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GREEK TRANSLATIONS:
Koukla-doll
Kouklamou- my doll
“Giatí échei makriá malliá?”- Why does he have long hair?
"Eísai apísteftos"-you're unbelievable
ITALIAN TRANSLATIONS:
Sei un tesoro-you're a sweetheart.
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