#(because I think it fits but also I love Tsunade and there’s this line she says in the spin-off) | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sup-hoes-its-me · 3 years

Text

Fine Line (Kakashi x Reader)

A/N: hey. Friends to lovers (the only trope i respect) You’re about to marry someone else, a prince from another village in an attempt to save relations with said village, only kakashi stands in the way of that, and everyone knows.

Also, i know kakashi would never do this in reality, but gosh is it romantic to imagine

Word count: 5400

“Y/N, you really need to sleep,” Kakashi sighed, leaning on his fist which sat on the thin, flimsy armchair beside her bed.

She hadn’t slept properly for weeks now, day after day only falling asleep at random hours of the day, naps in the afternoon and a half hour of shut eye in the early morning. She ate sporadically, and her schedule had admittedly started to interfere with her friend’s. Kakashi found himself in her apartment, awake the majority of the nights trying to calm her down.

But nothing was going to help this situation. Tsunade had decided already, after Y/N had hesistantly agreed. It wasn't as if this marriage was forced, but it certainly wasn’t ideal.

The woman never really imagined herself marrying at all, but if she had, she always dreamed it would be out of love for the other person, someone who would match her perfectly like a puzzle piece, essentially, someone who would complete her.

Instead, she had been hastily shoved into an arranged marriage with a man she and Kakashi guarded on one of their missions. He was the wealthy crown prince in the Land of Frost. He was kind enough, and he respected her wishes when it came to the proposal, giving Y/N a month to decide whether she was ready to be wed to such a man.

He promised her the entire world. Jewels, clothes, children, a palace in which to live the rest of her days, anything she could possibly need he would have servants at her beck and call.

It hadn’t seemed like the worst idea at all, and Y/N shortly considered it. It wasn’t until Tsunade heard about it that things became serious.

The relationship between the two lands was falling apart, and this was a last resort, she had said. It wouldn’t mean she could never see her friends again but meetings would be scarce, and she was positive he wouldn't let her train and go on the occasional, non-dangerous mission. It would be as if she were abandoning her entire life, she realized as the weeks passed after the engagement was set.

And so the letter was sent back to the Land of Frost, and abruptly, Y/N L/N found herself engaged to be married in 3 months time. It seemed surreal, only having 90 days practically, to enjoy her normal life and prepare for an entirely new world. She hadn’t known anything else other than the way of shinobi, nor had she adjusted to other cultures. The Leaf was her home, and the thought of leaving it broke her heart.

For the first time in her life, it seemed she was petrified. Sure, there were times when she felt like everything was set up against her, that the enemy might win, but she hadn’t felt so hopeless and lost either. There always seemed to be a light at the end of the tunnel.

Not this time.

“Please, just finish your tea and rest. You’re wasting away,“ he told her again, whispering in a soft tone only the two of them could hear. She was in the medical ward for the night, low blood sugar bringing her in this time. The dangerous combo of not sleeping or eating had set her body into a panic. She was so weak.

As she sipped the tea she sighed, feeling that sting of warmth run down her throat and bring some feeling to her empty, weak stomach. She couldn’t look at the man sitting beside her, it would only bring her pain, she decided. How could she face him? She was leaving him after all this time.

It had been decades since they were apart for longer than the standard mission time. He was always there right alongside her. They grew up on the same street in the same complex. They attended the academy together, fought in the war side by side, travelled the world as jounin just trying to make their way through the twists and turns of village politics. She felt like shit having to leave him behind. It wasn’t like her new husband was going to let her have weekly visits to her old friend, a man who was closer than anyone else she knew. It wasn’t plausible.

Slowly, she had realized that one day would be the last day she could hug Kakashi, that she could look up to him and hear his calm tone telling her it would all be okay, that he would never leave her behind, that he would always be there to protect her as long as she did the same for him. It wasn’t going to be like that anymore, and it often brought tears to her eyes in the late of night in her apartment, tears saturating her pillows and face swelling from the suffocated sobs. One day would be the last time she saw him, and it just hurt so badly. At times she found herself gasping for air, so terrified she couldn't find breath..

So, no, Y/N couldn't bring herself to face Kakashi. Maybe if she distanced herself little by little as the few months went on, it would be easier leaving. Leaving everyone behind. Kakashi, Gai, Kurenai, all the students she had grown to care about over the years. To spend her last days avoiding the people she would miss so dearly seemed like a waste of time and irrational, but it was the only thing that seemed reasonable in her confused mind.

“I can’t,” she replied softly, setting her mug down on the table to the other side of her bed. “How do you expect me to sleep?”

He shook his head in disapproval, his arms crossed over his chest as he leant back in his chair. He replied, “I don’t know. Just close your eyes and it’s bound to happen. You could at least try.” His suggestion was pretty useless, and he knew that. Hell, the amount of times he stayed awake when she begged him to sleep, he should have known he wasn’t going to get anywhere.

“And if I don’t want to?”

He sighed, his eyes rolling to the ceiling, as he muttered, “What is your prince going to say when he sees you with black eye bags and cheeks sunken in?” He felt disgusted, hearing those words leave his mouth. Not only was she to be married to someone she barely knew, but she had to impress him. She had to change herself to fit his narrative of a woman, stereotypically beautiful, effortless yet hard working at the same time. He felt sick to his stomach thinking about that prince, and the ploy Tsunade had put up in the way of arranging them together.

Absolutely sickened.

She peered over at him and frowned. “Between you and me, I don’t give a fuck what that guy thinks,” she whispered, her eyes resting on the doorway to make sure no late night nurses were walking through. “I wish he would take one look at me and break the engagement himself.”

“You don’t have to do this, Y/N.” His eyes now drawn on her, watching as she took another long sip of her tea, which he now suspected was spiked with something Gai had given her on his way out, something to numb the pain she was feeling. It burned her throat so good, and dulled her mind just enough to ease her. The Green Beast understood her desire to help the village, but he also sided with Kakashi in that she could change her mind at any point in time.

Even Gai knew she wasn’t happy, everyone fucking knew.

“Oh, but I do, Kakashi. I don’t really have a choice at this point.”

“You do. Don’t let a spoiled prince take away your happiness,” he argued, his face turned just the slightest shade of red at his frustration. He wanted to wring this prince by the neck for what he had done, for the tough situation Y/N was put in. Either save the relationship between two nations or be selfish and do nothing. “Please, Y/N.”

A part of him liked to believe that his begging was simply to save his friend from a horrible fate, that he was just doing what a normal person would do and defend someone who seemed so helpless, only that wasn’t it. It was never that in the first place. He wouldn’t have been the one to fall apart in Tsunade’s office when she told him that the pair were engaged, screaming profanities at the Hokage who only looked up at him with pity in her eyes. And he certainly wouldn’t have run all the way across the village to her apartment and bang on the door until she opened. He wouldn’t have left her room that night with a tear about to fall from his eye, and vomit coming up in his throat. He wouldn’t have thrown up in the middle of the street that night. Not if he was simply protecting a friend.

He knew that the reason this hurt him so badly is because he loved her. He always knew there was something there, but there was never any reason to act on his feelings. They had all the time in the world it seemed, just the two of them soldiering on in this boring life. Telling her how he felt, how much he wanted her...that wouldn’t have changed a thing between them other than made things just that much more difficult.

Now, Kakashi found himself regretting everything. If only he had said something before, maybe she could have stayed here in the Leaf with him, and all her other friends who had become her family over these decades of struggling together. If only he had stepped up and been brave. He never faltered in the face of fear; why did it have to be the only time he did that screwed him over.

“Kakashi, I can’t go back on the engagement. It would cause us to lose one of our greatest allies,” she told him calmly, but her heart was once again beating too fast for comfort. She found herself falling into that downward spiral of hopelessness once again. She looked over at him with a quiver in her lip and tears bubbling up at her waterline, words softly leaving her mouth, so quiet he almost missed it. “I was fitted for a wedding gown two days ago. I-It was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. He asked me to pick what flowers I want at the ceremony.”

“Ah, I see.”

“All I wanted to say was wilted fucking roses, thorns and all. Weeds and empty branches.”

“Just run away if you have to, run for long enough that he forgets about you,” Kakashi suggested, a bit of plea in his voice for her to listen to anything, anything that would get her away from that man, this horrible fate. “You don’t need to do this. Tsunade can make it work.”

“Kakashi.” Y/N paused, biting her lip. Her head was beginning to buzz from the tea she was drinking, one in which Gai added more than a bit of sake to numb the pain. Something the nurses at this godforsaken hospital refused to give her. She gazed over at him with a glaze over her eyes, her cheeks draining of any last bit of color she had in them.

“Yes?”

“I don’t want to marry him,” she confessed, that much was obvious. “I wish I was marrying you instead.”

“Y/N-”

“I’ve never even looked at someone twice because of you. I’ve only ever wanted you, for fuck’s sake.” she bit out harshly, her voice raising with every word. Her eyes were trailed painfully on his own, glaring fire into him. "All these years, all these long, painful years, it's always been you, Hatake."

Just as he was about to say something in response, she had leaned over and pushed him away from her. He opened his mouth to get out a word, but nothing came out. Her angry shouts filled his ears, and he found himself falling. He stood from his chair and backed away from her bed.

“Just get out, Kakashi. It doesn’t matter how the fuck I feel anymore. I should have never said anything. At this point, I'm just tormenting myself. Just get out,” she hissed. “Get out, get out, get out.” Her shouts were painful to hear, but he understood. He wasn’t angry, unlike the girl with the overwhelming emotions bubbling out from the ears. His heart raced at her words, at the rushing emotions flowing through his veins.

He walked out the door without saying goodbye, just hearing her crying behind him while he pushed open the cracked door. As he shut the door behind him, he noticed a particular pink haired girl standing against the wall. She stared at him in shock, having heard the outbursts from the woman in the room who she was just about to check up on to make sure vitals were okay. She heard the confession, and she heard the subsequent backlash. She heard the parts about Y/N not wanting to marry the prince as well.

It wasn’t exactly well known that she resented the engagement, but it was fairly obvious if you spent enough time with the kunoichi, which Sakura surely did being a medical nin.

“Sensei, are you okay?”

“Yes, Sakura, I’m fine,” he breathed, finding himself at a loss for words and lungs utterly useless.

Sakura grabbed onto his arm, peering up at him with just an ounce of determination in her eyes. “You need to convince Y/N-sensei to break the engagement.”

“I know.”

“Did you talk to Lady Tsunade.”

“She won’t listen to me.”

“Then I’ll try to talk to her too. She's not a cruel woman, but she is set on this engagement. She believes it will unite the two villages for hundreds of years. Y/N is one of our best and brightest after all.” Sakura told the man in the darkness of the hospital halls, her soft voice echoing on white walls. “I know it doesn’t seem like things will work out, and maybe Lady Tsunade won't listen. But you have to convince Y/N to stand up for herself."

He nodded, but it felt hopeless even pretending that things would change.

“You two were meant for each other. You can’t just give up on that now.”

And with that, he left down the hall, waving goodbye to his student. He didn’t know how exactly he was going to do this, work out this mess in his favor, but it was worth a shot trying. If he didn’t, it would mean losing the love of his life. He couldn’t lose anyone else, not this time.

Please, just not this time.

________________________

Despite being dressed in all white, Y/N felt anything but pure. She had been dolled up the entire morning by her friends and the young girls of the village. Ino, Hinata and her sister, and a handmaiden sent from the Land of the Frost to prepare her for her wedding that day. Her dress was embroidered with small snowflakes and wisps of silver and baby blue details.

Already she felt as if she were being taken from her village and her heritage with all this decoration from the other land. Not to mention she would be married off somewhere foreign and cold, alone without the comfort of her family and friends here in the Leaf. The only people to be escorting her to the other village would be the handmaid, a couple guards from the Frost, and Kakashi.

Her final request was allowing him to come with her just for the wedding. And maybe it was cruel, to have him there as both their hopes for a happy ending dissolve, but she needed him. There was no way she would make it through the wedding without him standing to the side supporting her, even if the support was purely obligatory.

She never said anything to Tsunade, in fear of being rejected or patronized for changing her mind. Instead. She just waited for the fateful day.

Y/N stood at the gates, arms crossed over her chest as she stared out into the woods, a white and silver carriage sitting before her with 3 horses standing tall ahead. This was the life waiting for her across the boundary, in the faraway land she would never recognize as home. It would be her last day in the village for a long time, at least until she was allowed to leave. Still, her life wouldn’t be the same ever again. She never dreamed of living in a world where she was forced to be a housewife, alone in a giant house without her companions, without the rush of the hunt on missions, without feeling the chakra flowing thickly through her veins.

She’d said her goodbyes. Cleared out her apartment, leaving the majority of her belongings behind with friends and family. She wouldn’t be needing it where she was going.

“Kakashi?” she asked softly, peering over her shoulder at the man leaning against the gate, a book in his hand, the other tucked into his pocket. He wore nice clothing. Better than usual, at least. He wasn’t an honored guest, honestly, he wasn’t truly invited, she was just bringing him along upon her own stubbornness. He looked nice, dressed up like he cared today.

He lifted his eyes and hummed in reply, obviously lost in his own thoughts as well.

“I feel like I should have stayed longer in the village, to say goodbye. Our friends...Gai and all our students, Iruka...I feel like I'm just abandoning them,” she told him. “I just don’t think I’m ready to say goodbye. I guess I just don’t know how to say goodbye, a real goodbye. I’ve never felt like this- like I need to put so much thought behind a farewell because honestly, I’ve never felt like it would be my last one.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I have never intentionally left someone knowing that I’ll never see them again. It fucking sucks that I’m standing here knowing I’ll never see you guys again after this. I can’t accept it like that though. I keep thinking that after this is all over life will be back to normal, but it won’t.”

“I know. We should have tried harder to get you out of this mess. I could have said something-”

“It’s not your fault. I-I shouldn’t have agreed in the first place. I only agreed because I didn’t think I had a chance with you, so what would it matter leaving to be with someone else,” she blurted out, her truths coming out in heavy waves, “It would make me less lonely, I thought, even though it’s clearly done the opposite. I’ve never felt more impending loneliness than I do now.”

He sighed, shutting his book and stuffing it into his jacket pocket. It was like him to bring his romance novellas on a trip like this. She wanted to smile at his hobby, but her heart felt too heavy in her chest to even lift her lips. “I’ll see you again, Y/N. One day, I’ll get the chance to go back there and see you, as long as you let me in.”

“I don’t want it to just be one day,” she cried, throwing her arms down at her sides. She felt gross in these dreary robes, too decorated for her tastes altogether. “I want to see you everyday. I never want to go another day without you by my side. Jesus, this whole situation is just sick.”

He placed a hand on her shoulder and furrowed his brow. “Keep quiet. You’re gonna make a scene, Y/N.”

“I just can’t be quiet about this. Don’t you understand how I’m feeling? Aren’t you going to miss me too?” The woman asked, feeling her hands begin to sweat as she clenched them over and over. She stared at him, right into his exposed eye, her breaths becoming shallower with every passing moment. Panic creeped up her neck so quickly, smothering her thoughts, rationale flying out the window.

“Of course I will, L/N. That’s a stupid question, and you know it. I’m just trying not to get caught fraternizing with a future queen, yeah?” he mumbled, his voice hushed. "Just calm down. You're getting pale." He wanted to reach down and run his hands along her arms, smooth over her shoulders for just a bit of comfort, but he refrained. He didn't want to touch her in front of wandering eyes, the eyes of any Frost people.

After scanning the area, she grabbed a hold of his wrist, her fingers firm with no intention of letting go. “We need to leave. You and me, we can get out of here.”

“What?” He could only ask, completely stunned at her suggestion.

“Remember what you told me in the hospital. You told me to run away. We run away from here now, for as long as it takes for the prince to give up on me.” How scandalous, he thought. He couldn’t possibly just take the bride and run, could he? He hadn’t even pondered that route in his nightly daydreaming before bed, tossing and turning trying to think of a way to save his friend from the depths of whatever this prince had to offer.

“Y/N, I meant just you. I-I can’t just go against Lady Tsunade like that-”

“Kakashi Hatake, you’re my best friend, but more importantly, I’m in love with you. If I’m not wrong, the feeling is mutual. If that doesn’t make you want to run away together then I call cowardice,” she said boldly, her eyes never once leaving his own. “Come on, we don’t have the time for this.”

This could ruin him, he knew that full well. But there was just something about this woman he couldn’t let slip from his grasp. His entire world fell into her hands. When he felt that inevitable tug on his arm, pulling him into the familiar woods before them, he found himself following without a single restraint. The only thing he felt was his heart racing in his chest, bursting with an adrenaline he hadn’t felt in a long time.

They pushed through the forest for as long as she could run, tripping over branches and roots along the way, but never losing grip of each other. Her blood pulsed through her veins, and honestly, she had never felt more alive. Her entire life she found herself bowing down to those superior to her, listening to each word they say and meeting their every beck and call. She accepted a proposal she desperately wanted to decline solely to please the Hokage, one of the worst mistakes of all because she needed to obey.

It felt so fucking good to break the rules, to be disobedient for once in her sorry life.

Finally, after running for what seemed like miles, she finally slowed to a stop next to a particularly large tree. Her palms pressed against the rough bark, wood chips digging into her calloused hands. He slowed to a stop beside her and watched silently as she caught her breath, her chest rising and falling under the thick robes she wore.

“These shoes sure as hell aren’t made for running,” she mumbled, looking down at the pathetic slippers they’d given her. “I think we are far enough away that we can sit and talk for a little bit.”

“Yeah, you wanna talk about how you committed treason.”

“You did, too. Don’t blame this all on me.”

“You were the one with all your “cowardice” and “love” crap. God, this entire thing feels like it’d come out of one of Master Jiraiya's novels.”

She took a seat on the ground, not caring if the dirt stained her robes. Why would she care? She was dead either way. If Tsunade ever laid eyes on her again, Y/N knew she’d be a goner. That woman would kill with no hesitation, she was convinced of it. Y/N’s eyes trailed back up to her the man, and she could only groan. “Listen I know there were definitely better ways of doing this, but I’m not the sharpest kunai in the box. I was just doing what my feral instincts were telling me to do. You were the one who just followed after me like a lost puppy.”

He rolled his eyes, huffing out, “What was I supposed to do? Think rationally? You’ve got my brain turned to mush half the damn time; what do you want from me?”

“Don’t worry, you’re literally Tsunade’s best ninja- She’ll let you back into the village.”

“You’re not that bad yourself-”

“Yeah, that’s why she tried to pawn me off to the Land of Frost to be a stay-at-home mom. Things aren’t lining up, Kakashi.”

He sighed, finally deciding to take a seat beside her against the tree trunk. He leant his head against the wood, his eyes peering up into the trees. Things had taken a wild turn, that’s for sure. He really did feel like he was in one of his romantic drama, the only thing missing was the R-rated content-Not that that was what he was thinking about, of course not…

How the story would end, he didn’t really know.

“Well, what’s done is done. Whether it was a bad decision or not.”

“I really didn’t think this through.”

“Nope.”

She turned to him, her eyebrows furrowed deeply, frustrated with this entire thing. “Kakashi, I did this because of you. Because of what we have going on between us. Did you want me to be married off to that pig of a prince?” she questioned.

“No.”

She nodded at his answer and leaned back in her spot. Her arms worked their way to being crossed over her chest, and she couldn’t look him in the eyes at this point, her sight set on a particular mushroom a few yards away. Her words were curt, if not awkward, “Speaking of which, we need to discuss what we are or how we feel or whatever.”

“I thought that was obvious.”

“Not really. I mean, I’ve told you how I feel already, but um, you haven’t said a thing.”

“But you clearly know.”

She shook her head, a bit of heat rising up her cheeks and ears. “Doesn’t matter. I gotta hear you say it, for real.”

Kakashi let his eyes wander over to the woman, who sat there like a child with her arms crossed and her eyes tucked away somewhere else. He almost wanted to laugh. She reminded him of a student at times with her bashfulness. It was definitely one of the many things he liked about her. “What? Do you want me to tell you I love you, or something?”

“Yes, that would be nice after all the trouble I’ve been through for you.”

He chuckled that time. Of course, all the trouble…”Y/N, I guess I love you. I guess I spent all these years ignoring my feelings, and it took this whole arranged marriage thing to make me realize I was missing out on a really good thing,” he confessed, voice softer than usual. “When you told me in the hospital, riding out your buzz from the spiked tea Gai gave you, that you wished you were marrying me instead, I just knew I had to have you. Truly though, I knew on our first meeting that I wanted you.”

“I was such a clumsy idiot back then. I think I’ve matured a lot since then, don’t you think?”

“Maybe, you’re still a clumsy idiot, just one with great ninjutsu.”

“Hey!”

"All I know is that I loved the feeling of falling in love with you. How good it made me feel. I was more worried about you than ever before, but every time you smiled and said hello, anything you did really, started to make my days better and better,” he continued, “This life has been cold and harsh to me, but you just swooped in and made it worth something.”

She felt her heart beat faster in her chest hearing that, a warmth growing in her stomach as she scooted closer to him, inch by inch. He clearly didn’t take notice or mind, so she pressed her side to his, shoulder to shoulder and thigh to thigh. She felt ridiculous in these heavy ginormous robes, too bulky to move properly. She dropped her head on his shoulder gently, and felt him relax into her touch.

“I love you so much it hurts. My hands are shaking because of all the love that’s overflowing,” she told him with a sheepish grin, holding up her hand so he could indeed see that her hand was vibrating. He clasped her hand in his own and lowered them to his lap. His thumb ran over her knuckles in soft strokes, and she melted into the gentle touch of the man she cared so deeply for.

“I’m glad I ran away with you.”

“Me too.”

________________________________

It had been about 3 days before someone found them wandering in a nearby village. It was only a matter of time before they were found and brought back to the Leaf, anyway, so no surprise to them there. It was exciting having a few days without responsibilities, just living almost as if they were civilians in love.

People in the village stared as the pair walked through the streets of the town, whispers being heard and looks shared. It was only a matter of time before everyone knew about the Copy-nin and his battered bride companion being escorted into Konoha.

Tsunade was in her office waiting for them to arrive. The door shut behind them, and Y/N wished someone was there to witness the Hokage murder them, only, the fatal blow never came. Instead, calm words reached their ears.

“I’d say I’m surprised, but I’m really not.”

“Lady Tsunade, let me explain what happened-” Y/N started to say, but she was quickly interrupted.

“I really don’t need to hear the details of your 3 day sex-capade,” she dismissed, a look of disgust crossing her face. Y/N’s face morphed into that of pure horror, the thought of the Hokage and everyone in the village that knew they ran away assuming that’s what they’d been doing. It was humiliating, to say the least. She didn’t have time to process the fact before the Hokage spoke again, “I’m mad because you two essentially committed treason, but thankfully, the prince didn’t have any complaints. He apparently saw a psychic the day of the wedding who told him that his marriage was cursed for eternity, and was ready to call off the entire thing. Superstitious bastard.”

“So, the Land of the Frost and the Leaf are still allies?” Kakashi asked.

“Yes, fortunately," the Hokage stated simply. She lifted her eyes to the younger woman, and the exasperation was obvious in her appearance as well as tone. The girl in question nervously rubbed her forearm, embarrassed beyond belief. It was one thing getting screamed at, but it was another to be scolded like a child. "Y/N, if you wanted to break the arrangement, you should have just told me. I could have worked it out somehow. There was no need for all this drama.”

She bit her lip, not knowing what to say. She really should have said something before, but she was foolish. “I know, but I didn’t want to disappoint you," the woman mumbled awkwardly.

“Well, you did.” Ouch, so blunt.

“I know.”

She nodded, clearly having said what needed to be said. Her eyes dipped back down to her paperwork. The air wasn't nearly as heavy as when the pair first walked in, and Y/N finally felt air fill her lungs once again. Her nerves had really been for nothing, thankfully.

“Very well, you two are dismissed. Don't go around pulling shit like this again, or I’ll see to it that you actually receive punishment.”

The doors shut behind them, and Y/N let a smile grow on her cheeks. She turned to the man at her side, her smile only growing that much more at the sight of his handsome face. “Things sure worked out for me. I didn’t get in trouble for my crimes, and I have a boyfriend now,” she gleamed.

He smirked, rolling his eyes. “Don’t get too cocky. You still have to deal with Gai.”

“I’m not prepared for the amount of hugs I am about to receive.”

“Neither am I.”

And as they heard those oh-so familiar, loud footsteps rushing up the stairs of the Hokage Tower, they knew they were in for it.

"Kakashi! Y/N! I heard the joyous news of your return!"

Oh, boy.

#naruto x reader #kakashi hatake x reader #kakashi x reader #kakashi one shot #naruto imagine #naruto one shot #kakashi imagine #kakashi hatake #my writing #i really hope someome enjoys this

202 notes · View notes

thefairyletters · 3 years

Note

Could you answer this question? I went through a bunch of Sakura fics, many recommended by yourself (many good ones, thanks for your excellent taste!) but I also explored on my own, which is how this question spurred. I was wondering why so many ppl want Sakura to have wood release? &, because it's been a while so my memory's foggy, wasnt wood release sort of a bloodline thing? They had to infuse Hashirama's cells w/ Yamato for him to use it. It seems a little...I guess radical to give it to her? I LOVE Sakura, which is exactly why it kind of throws me off. I think she's already strong as is, & I think being able to utilize genjutsu & slug sage mode are logical expansions of her abilities, so wood release seems very...Idk how to put it but it seems like erasing Sakura. I'm discovering that I truly really dont think I like BAMF Sakura fics a lot bc it just doesnt read AS Sakura. It's like the author's are ashamed of her. Also I dislike when they use Strong!Sakura as a tag on ao3 bc she IS strong that HASNT changed & there's a canonical version of BAMF!Sakura in everything before the Pein arc. Everything after the Pein arc turned the entire series in a bad fanfiction for everyone in itself.

Thank you, I'm happy to know you enjoyed my recs!

That's a good question.

This is what I think makes Sakura badass ➡ here

I love Sakura the way she is, as well. Her development, however, is lacking not in terms of her personality but her skillset. She has impressive chakra control, monstrous strength and is one of the two frontline medics and one of the best healers in the world. She has impressive feats under her belt as well, two of the most remarkable include her byakugo seal and her fight with Sasori alongside Chiyo. But it pales in comparison to her teammates, including Sai and Kakashi. I don't mind that too, because her journey is different than others, excluding Lee and possibly Tenten. She isn't seen much involved in fights, her attacks are repetitive in the show, she isn't bestowed many techniques under her belt and her best moments are in games and novels. It is not her character's fault but Kishimoto who just doesn't use her strength and intelligence which he (and other characters) have mentioned she has.

She is genjutsu type – but has she ever performed one, or even gotten out of one easily? Whats the use of such information if Kishimoto doesn't use it?

She has near perfect chakra control – she should be easily able to perform many techniques and practice different elements, especially water, but earth style and cloning is what we mostly ever see her use.

She has good foundation in Taijutsu – and that should increase her stamina and therefore her chakra coils, and that in turn will ensure she is able to use many techniques.

Her medical and research skills are only next to Tsunade – and we wish to see her revolutionize the medical field which she has but in Borutoverse. That is time skip. That doesn't really relive you much.

She has resistance to mind jutsus, thanks to her inner personality – and theoretically she should be able to even evade strong genjutsus like she did Ino's clan technique (something never been done before) but Kishimoto only used that incredible ability once. ONCE.

She has massive chakra storage and exceptional chakra control and sensitivity – she should be able to master Senjutsu, a field which is all about chakra. Anything that has to do with chakra control is Sakura's playground.

She is more or less an unofficial poison expert – but we didn't see her playing with poison expertly (a poison that even Suna's poison experts failed to break) after Gaara's retrieval arc.

She is the smart and responsible one of team 7 – but Kishi often makes her look both stupid and selfish. We don't see her use her intelligence much. I hate that more than her lacking in the expansion of the skills.

She trained under a political leader – that itself makes her and Shizune great administrators and governors. So, out of everyone, Sakura is the one of the best Hokage material. Hokage is said to be the strongest fighter of the village but that requirement failed us when Tsunade became the fifth Hokage.

She has yin seal – the strongest seals one can make, in their own body no less. It also shows her expert control of her chakra. She can summon one of the big 3 summons. Sealing is more or less code that requires high intelligence and great chakra control that can be fused into the ink. As far as I can tell, she is one of the best candidates to learn Fuinjutsu.

With all these possibilities of her growth – because it is not something we make up but something Kishi has implied she has but never explored – how can one not exploit it? It doesn't mean one doesn't love Sakura for who she is but that its because they love her that they want to give her what she has the right to. She doesn't have to be expert at something to be powerful, just her putting her skills to best use is admirable as it is. I love Sakura for who she is and who she could be.

Now, onto the question as to why people seem to favour giving Sakura wood release, this are the following reasons that I think could be it:

Does it have to be bloodline limit?

Kishimoto gave Hashirama a unique bloodline limit that apparently cannot be inherited by any other Senju. That defeats the purpose of bloodline limit. What makes Senju clan so different? Without Hashirama in the picture, you cannot distinctly identify a Senju clan member aside from their strong chakras. Tobirama is identified for his water techniques. Tsunade has perfect control of her chakra that allowed her to exhibit monstrous strength and incredible healing abilities. How come wood release is a bloodline limit but is not passed down the line?

It is complicated because Tsunade is also renowned for her perfect chakra control just like Hashirama. So, some stories make Sakura a secret Senju clan member because of her uncanny resemblance to Tsunade and Senju clan in general. Pink hair can be a diluted version of Red (Mito) and her chakra control originating directly from Hashirama's lineage.

I personally don't like this because I love Sakura being a civilian child.

It's not a bloodline limit:

So, assuming wood release is not a bloodlimit but a very hard technique requiring precise chakra control and mastery of dual elements Earth and Water, then it is possible for Sakura to practice same technique because of her prodigious chakra control. By that logic, we can also assume that Tenzo inherited Hashirama's unique chakra control to use wood release. Because Orochimaru could have used Tsunade's DNA too if it was only about clan blood. So that rules out bloodline limit.

I love the idea of Sakura practising wood release because it is possible for her to do so. So if an author gives Sakura wood release that she hones with practice and control (ref. fanfic: Labyrinthine) instead of having been gifted with it, I'm digging it.

Nature chooses the wood user:

Naruto universe has many references to spiritual entities such as gods/goddesses, reincarnation and celestial bodies. It is conceivable to make nature an ethereal entity that has its own will. Sakura looks like the embodiment of spring with her petal hair and green eyes, and Hashirama can be compared to wood with his warm personality and appearance, these attributes can make them look distinctly attractive to nature. No other characters remind me strongly of nature than these two so I suppose they can be uniquely selected to be blessed this ability. Tenzo's abilities is the result of human experiment by Orochimaru who always cheats on nature so he is an exception.

I only like this because I like the idea of Sakura being Nature's child.

Most stories that I love don't give her a special edge and only give her more techniques under her arsenal. It is very rarely that I love an OCC Sakura who has a bloodline, a clan or godlike abilities.

After Pein's arc, Naruto turned into a joke. Everyone in team 7 (barring Sakura, Sai and Yamato) and long list of antagonists seemed to get power ups left and right. Sakura got hers in the last moment as a last ditch effort to reunite team 7 as one, a moment that felt so hasty that I couldn't take the show seriously at all. I was so disappointed with the whole war arc. I cringe just thinking about it. I sometimes think if it would have been better for everyone to just die with happily ever after in their mind. That would be tragic but a fitting end because Madara became too OP and Kaguya ridiculously so.

The reason people add 'Strong', 'BAMF', 'Smart' prefixes before Sakura is the reason why people add extra qualities to Sakura's character. They are not satisfied with how Sakura handles herself in fights and many base her fights with the one she had with Sasori. After that, did you see her actively participating in any major fight, barring her attempts to make a score on sidelines? Usually, these fanfictions also justify why she is Tsunade 2.0, something the Naruto failed to show.

By the way, many stories have BAMF tag for Shikamaru, Naruto and Sasuke as well. Are they not already strong af? They don't use Strong tag for them though, and that's because their fighting prowess is already seen. Shikamaru is not much of a fighter as much as he is a strategist and a leader. He is a cool and sly character. Naruto and Sasuke have flashy moves with flashy names under their belt with absurd power levels that puts them in god tier. Sakura has none of that – no signature move that is uniquely her, no clan to back her, no move with a name (barring game moves) – and she is seen useless because she is a healer which is a non-offensive, background job even if it is the most crucial and taxing job. It's significance is even more reduced when people point out how her work is futile because they are again sent to the fight/missions once they are up to go. Most fans only care for visual aesthetics, regardless of how rare and in-demand medics are because of the lack of qualified people who can muster and use medical chakra properly.

Sakura is more than just a healer but in canon she is more or less reduced to that. To make things worse for her, both Ino and Hinata are also shown to have healing techniques. They both also have clan techniques (vastly unknown) with them which makes them appear more 'useful'. Sakura is literally in the shadow of her mentor and her friends.

In Boruto, she is said to be the most powerful Kunoichi of her generation and quite possibly the greatest medic in the world but in Shippuden it is severely undermined. This is also why Boruto fans love Sakura but a bunch of Shippuden fans don't.

I mostly don't judge BAMF/Strong Sakura fanfictions, but I mostly avoid Anbu Sakura fanfictions if I can because I personally don't belive Sakura to be an Anbu material.

I want to add more, but I think I got my point across. Thank you for reading this far. I hope I answered your question adequately.

#sakura #sakura haruno #answered #at least thats what I think #let me know what you feel about this #im so happy to know you loved my recs #naruto #haruno sakura #bamf sakura #she is always bamf #ao3 tags #fanfictions #opinion post

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avversiera-writes · 3 years

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try again; in every day we breathe life [tobirama senju/you] - EPILOGUE

Chapter 10: Epilogue - The World As He Fixed It

Summary: A new member is added into the Senju family, and you finally find out what your husband is up to.

Word Count: ~5k

also available on AO3.

“We do not have to go,” Tobirama says quietly as he shuffles around behind you, as you put each clothing material you have under scrutiny.

You whirl towards him in confusion. “Why not? This is concerning your nephew. And your newborn grand-niece .”

At that, your eyes perk up in excitement for him. Tobirama has actually long lived enough to witness a new generation of his family, and his brother’s grandchild, and you reckon there will be more to come.

You step closer to him, and he watches you intently as you do. “You are now a grand-uncle.”

Tobirama’s hands come up to your elbow gently. “You know why I am thinking twice about visiting.”

Your eyes wander down to his collarbones and you find yourself unable to meet his eyes. “Tobirama, I will be okay. I am happy for you.”

Tobirama’s hands fall away, and you turn away from him to look at your clothes once again. You can feel his eyes poring over you, but you shrug it off.

“Besides, they are your family,” you say to him, and then, the two of you leave it at that.

The walk towards Tobirama’s nephew’s home is peaceful, but you walk with trepidation. You are not sure how you will react once you finally get to meet Tobirama’s grand-niece, though you have been managing quite well enough until that day you passed out in the street. Sometimes it is hard to control what enters your mind or what your body decides to react to. You are not the fortitudinous shinobi you once were anymore, even if you have kept close to its principles. Your thinking has changed, and despite the painful reminder, your body has never been the same as before either.

However, in every breath you take, a will so resilient keeps you going.

“You know,” you start, your mind making up the words to say as you speak. However, you keep going and it feels just right. “There are many civilian families that have shinobis as their family members, and are unbelonging to any clan. I think we must...do better in supporting them.”

Tobirama glances at you, letting you know that he is listening.

“What I mean is. I know that we cannot replace lives, but we must offer some relief to those who have lost their children, their parents. We must do better. I know that I no longer serve as a shinobi, and I may never get to know what our people go through, but we must start somewhere.”

Tobirama nods, and you can practically see his mind brainstorming for ideas, but then he stops and he gives you a small smile. “I think that it’s brilliant. Since it is your idea, I will help you instead. You can take the reins on this one. All the directives are yours. I only serve to make your vision happen.”

You look at him in surprise, but it is fitting in a way. Tobirama has always been the one with the plans and the oversight to everything, but this, giving you this to work on, is a bigger step closer to share his ambitions. Even if you have been helping Tobirama as Hokage, there are times where you cannot do so, but this is different. This new goal requires Tobirama to step back a little.

Tobirama is doing something for you that he once solely reserved for his brother, and maybe, maybe, despite all these years of serving the village, the two of you can finally do something for each other.

You cannot help your smile widen in excitement. “Thank you. I will blow your mind!”

Tobirama narrows his eyes at that. “Not exactly the words I want to hear. A thank you is enough.”

You roll your eyes, and nudge his arm with your elbow. “Have you no faith?”

Tobirama raises an eyebrow. “Well, for one. You are quite disorganized sometimes.”

“Okay, okay,” you let out a chuckle. “But I have learned a lot from you. There is order to my chaos, too, you know.”

“Tell that to my alphabetized files in my office,” Tobirama immediately retorts. “And my color-coded books and scrolls. My labelled drawers and boxes.”

“I get it, my gods, you and your drive to just be the best at everything!”

Tobirama had the nerve to look smug.

“Wow!” You exclaim sarcastically. “You are liking this, aren’t you? Bragging about yourself? Your ego knows no bounds.”

“Well, I am the best at everything. That is a fact, my darling,” Tobirama mockingly says, and you freeze at the endearment.

Tobirama rarely says these things, and it has caught you off guard. He keeps on walking ahead, widening the gap between the two of you.

“Do you see me right now?” You yell towards him. “I am shaking my fist at you!”

“Get in line, my love,” Tobirama says again and your mouth drops, aghast.

“Who are you?!” You cry out. You jog towards him lightly to catch up.

Tobirama actually laughs, the sound small and a little rough, but it sends you to roll your eyes.

“Gods, you have changed,” you comment under your breath.

Tobirama shrugs, and then he bumps his shoulder against yours. “In more ways than one, but we are always evolving. We never stay stagnant for long.”

You spot the house of Tobirama’s nephew, and for once, you do not feel like something is pressing on your chest to make it cave in. Maybe Tobirama had used this moment to lift your spirits up in the way he knows how.

You are grateful for it.

When the two of you had arranged your slippers just outside the door to the main living room, the two of you immediately heard Hashirama’s booming laughter. You share an amused look with your husband, and together, the both of you made your way over to them.

You see Hashirama holding his newborn grandchild, and you cannot help the smile spreading across your lips. The wonder in his face is infectious, and the room lights up in excitement, as Hashirama beckons his brother to come closer.

Tobirama hesitates, but when he gets close enough, Hashirama reaches over and pulls his hand, and proceeds to deposit Tsunade into his arms.

You watch as Tobirama’s eyes widen a fraction as he stares at his grand-niece in his arms. He touches her forehead gently with a finger, and he immediately looks at you. His face may look indiscernible to others, but you can tell that he is excited. He beckons you to come closer, and you do, and the two of you look at the new addition to the Senju family.

“She is beautiful,” you comment quietly.

You are aware that others look at you with some degree of alarm, but you pay no mind. Of course, they are allowed to feel that way, given that you had moments where you freak out, but you are completely calm now, and you are just happy for your husband and his family, even if there is a tone of bittersweetness catching at the back of your throat.

“Would you like to hold her?” Hashirama inquires, as you place the back of your hand on Tsunade’s cheek.

“Maybe later,” you reply, seeing how taken Tobirama is with his grand-niece.

After meeting Tsunade, the rest of the family gather at the dining table while the parents attend to their newborn. Tobirama excuses himself, having to run to his Hokage duties for the rest of the day, and after chatting with Hashirama and Mito, you also leave to get home, suddenly feeling exhausted from the many interactions with people. Usually, you are able keep up appearances in long social events, but now, every word you utter is exhausting. You wish that you can go back to how you were, and you hold on to that, trying your best to pull up the charisma you once wielded, and while you are victorious in putting up such a convincing facade, you cannot control what seeps in through your wall.

When you step inside your home, it is quiet. It is the kind of quiet, where you know that you are totally alone. There is no breath of a sigh, no footsteps, no doors sliding open and close. You stare at the winding hallways of your house as you pass by them, noting how undisturbed they look, how blue and cold.

Then you head upstairs, taking it step by step, until you are passing by your bedroom, and towards the room designated to your firstborn.

You stop by the door, and when you finally enter, the sight immediately brings tears to your eyes. The folded blankets, the stuff toys, the crib, the rocking chair, and the books in the room remain untouched, and they have been gathering dust for a while.

Your palm grazes across the surface of the crib, and rests on the tiny pillow situated on one side of the crib. The mobile that hangs above the crib, filled with dangling cranes and dragons spin aimlessly and without sound.

You let out a sob that you have been holding, but they are not from anger or bitterness. They are to mourn what could have been, what you have lost.

You let your tears run, and you let it go and course through you. You feel more of what you have been trying to run away from, because you know that sooner or later, you would have to face it.

The pain does not let up, but you feel something . It burns and soothes you at the same time, picks at scars but slowly heals it, with time.

Your eyes go around the room, where dust motes swirl where the light rays are beaming upon a surface. You spend a few more minutes in the room, but when you begin sneezing, you finally decide to leave it and opt to study up on the new project you proposed to Tobirama earlier.

You want to give your all on this one, and besides, you know you can use the work. You need to pour your effort and your restlessness into a new direction, because you never want others to feel as you do, as Kimiko does.

Maybe in a way, you no longer know what goes on in the lives of those who go into the field, but you were there once, and you understand the difficulties of just trying to make it out alive.

It is always life we cling to, and what makes us driven to preserve it. It is our silent prayer, even at the brink of death.

After jotting down your ideas and the beginnings of a plan for this new project of yours, you take a break to wander around the house aimlessly. You go into the connected rooms where you and Tobirama are currently building an extensive library and a personal museum for arts and Tobirama’s inventions, taking mental notes on what you ought to change later, when the two of you get the time to uncover more of the artifacts that your husband and his clan has collected over the years.

There are some weapons and supplies gathered in the last room, since the two of you shared the obsession of collecting them and learning how to use them.

Then, you make your way to your husband’s study. You stop by the threshold, not really stepping in just yet.

This room definitely speaks for Tobirama. It is neat and clean, and just as he had bragged, his books and his scrolls are all organized, and in alphabetical order. The files are labelled with his best handwriting, since he has a gorgeous penmanship. Better than yours, in fact.

You smile at that little detail about him. Even now, you are amused by all the qualities that he has. You should be used to him by now, but every day is a new day with him; re-learning him is not exhausting to you.

You opt not to go in, and instead, you go back for your things downstairs, and take it up to your bedroom to work on. As you lie on your bed and draft your official proposal for this project, your eyes flit to the ceiling and the papers around you. The day feels slow, and the heat of the afternoon sticks to you like a daze, and the next thing you know, your eyelids are feeling heavy, and your limbs give to your side, wrinkling a few papers.

Tobirama stares at the corpse in front of him, covered in tags that are marked by his own handwriting–they are his seals, and they are intricate and sprawling across the tags. They fan out, connecting to the next seal, and to the next one, until it is covering the whole corpse. Tobirama takes a deep breath, and he releases it slowly, focusing his chakra.

He closes his eyes, willing this to work, because it has to.

He takes the DNA of the corpse and smears it to a scroll, and he brings his hands together and begins to the weave signs.

However, when he puts a hand on the scroll, nothing happens with the corpse. He waits, because it is what he does a lot whenever he is doing his experiments, but nothing happens. His patience has run thin, and Tobirama lets out a shout of rage and brings a fist down on the table under him. It gives, along with the corpse and the papers and chemicals situated upon it.

Tobirama racks his mind. Something is still missing.

By now, he has figured out that he needs a soul and the dead body’s DNA. For this past year, he has been doing his best to reconstruct the corpse into a tangible body, preserving it to this very moment. He has taken limbs and other body parts to make it look human, and it has come down to this moment.

And still, there is nothing.

Tobirama needs to finish this. He needs to see this to the end, but he is stuck. He does not know what else he can do. Hell, he does not even know where to begin now.

He sticks his hand backwards, feeling out the wall, and when he comes in contact with it, he rests his back on the cold wall of his lab and he slides down.

He stares at the mess in front of him, feeling like a failure–a feeling that he detests so much but it hangs on him like a death sentence.

He has been losing sleep, missing out on his life and his family for this, and yet, it yields him no results.

Tobirama is tired, but it is not his time to rest.

He runs a hand down his face, feeling haggard, but an idea sparks to his mind that it almost makes him laugh.

Of course, this did not work because he is attempting to summon something from another plane of existence, the afterlife.

He has been going about this all wrong. No, he does not need a dead body, nor all the seals that he has made for it. He just needs their essence, and a sacrifice. A living one.

Tobirama actually does laugh this time, but it is not a jolly sound. It is metal grating against metal, it is low, sinister and more of an outburst–a response to all the troubles that he has been keeping inside for a long time.

He presses his palms to his eyes, and he digs it in, until his eyelids begin to look white. His body shakes, and his heartbeat hikes up until he feels it bounding on his neck.

He has his answer, but why does it make him like he just lost? This should be his victory. This is something good.

Right?

He has been telling himself that this is the right thing to do. The only way to do the right thing. Yet it fills him with emptiness.

However, he feels himself descend into this emptiness. He dives into it, face first. His hand reaches for the first paper he can touch, and a pen that happens to roll closer to him.

He writes down his thoughts about the Edo Tensei, about his assumptions and what he can test. He knows that he cannot use the living, because this village will take notice. They will have to be enemy shinobi. His thoughts disgust him–because he is only inconvenienced by the fact that he cannot use the people around him, and he has to look for a sacrifice somewhere else.

The thin line of what he can and cannot do begins to blur and Tobirama feels the madness that he is engulfed in. There is no difference between him and his enemies, as there are no bounds to what he will do to preserve what he has. He believes to be fighting for the good side, yet his enemies will claim to be doing the same thing.

His mind jumps from one thought to another, when he thinks of the underground prison that holds Kimiko and where other prisoners from outside the village get detained.

Tobirama’s hands begin to shake, but he wills them still. Then, he stands up. He feels his success spread through his chest, and he pushes back against what is telling him to stop. There is no stopping.

He rushes there, the door to his lab slamming open as he flies through the dingy, underground hallways.

The lights are dark green, and the walls are black, the paint fading and peeling away; they curl at the top and they look almost like fingers clawing against the wall. The air is thick with moisture, and his steps echo loud in his ears.

Finally, he arrives in front of Kimiko’s cell.

He hears Kimiko’s foreboding laugh.

“Come to finish the job, Lord Nidaime? Like you have done with the other prisoners?” Kimiko says, her voice raspy, like nails against a blackboard.

Tobirama grits his teeth. This scene is almost too familiar to him.

“So it didn’t work?” Kimiko asks in a hushed voice. “With all the bodies you have added to your kill, you still cannot turn things around?”

“I know what I have been doing wrong,” Tobirama drones on, his voice sounding cold and detached. It does not even feel like his own, but it sounds like his.

Kimiko approaches the bars of the cell, her appearance exactly like a corpse.

Tobirama looks her stone cold in the eye. “Miura Kimiko, as the Hokage, I hereby sentence you to death.”

You wake with a gasp, and the papers on you fall to the ground. You are covered in sweat, and it soaks the front of your shirt, like water has been splashed on you. You wipe the sweat from your brow with the back of your hand and you stare at the space in front of you. You let out a sigh, and you glance at the space beside you.

No Tobirama.

And the nightmares are back.

Your heart squeezes, and you swing your legs over the bed, deciding to get some fresh air.

For a while, you stand on the engawa, looking at the night sky and the low-hanging crescent moon. A howl hoots nearby, but other than that, it is quiet. You watch the streets from your house, as you can see it from where you are standing, but there is no sign of Tobirama coming home.

You cross your arms. It is very late. You wonder what is keeping him at work. You know that Tobirama rarely sleeps these days, and when he does, the hours are short and far in between.

Suddenly, there is knocking on the front gates and you rush to open it and see who is behind them. It cannot be Tobirama, since he has a key.

When you pull the gate open, you find Mito behind it, and you step back with wide eyes.

“Where is Tobirama?” She asks, a perturbed frown etched on her elegant, pristine face.

You shake your head. “Not here.”

Mito takes a deep breath and she composes herself. “I apologize for coming by so late. Hashirama has gone missing again. He is not in the village.”

Even though Mito is calmer than the ocean, you can sense the urgency behind her words. She never really loses her composure.

Your vision gets faraway for a second, and then it focuses on the dark streets of the Senju compound, which leads to the village.

“Us and our missing husbands,” you try to joke, but the tone of your voice sounds dead.

Mito’s eyes flash to you with concern. “I can come with you, if you’d like.”

You turn to her slowly, a sense of vertigo hanging on the center of your forehead. It takes a moment to process her words, but you shake off your stupor. You want to brave through your fears.

“I can manage, thank you, Mito,” you say. “If Hashirama comes back, it is best he finds a comforting face.”

Mito stares at you, but she does not object. “Be careful.”

You give her a wry smile. “Our Senju husbands are a handful, aren’t they?”

Mito sighs, and she reaches for your hand. “Thank you.”

The whole walk towards the Hokage office is filled with your uneasiness, and the paranoia that the shadows are about to jump at you, but you get there nonetheless. The first thing you notice is that the Hokage mansion is quiet. There is no one here, and when you get to the office itself, Tobirama is not there.

You stand outside the office doors for quite some time, until you finally get your legs to walk you towards the direction of Tobirama’s lab.

You hate going in there, as every aspect of the lab seems like a danger to you. It is the place where Tobirama spends the most time conjuring up jutsus, his very own controlled environment, that sometimes blew up because of his doing. It is suffocating in there and no light is permitted unless Tobirama puts up lanterns.

You sigh, as you step through the winding underground labyrinth. This place gives you more chills, since you know Kimiko is also here.

Come to think about it, this place is too quiet. There are no signs of life. Not even the rush of labored breathing.

The hairs on the back of your neck stand up, and you tread cautiously towards Tobirama’s laboratory.

As you get closer, you hear sounds of struggle and of things getting broken and slammed from impact.

You snap alert and you hurry towards the door. You pry it open, and just as you find Tobirama, you see him take his kunai and lodge it against his enemy’s neck, and through brute force, his kunai digs deep into the neck and through it, severing the head.

You stop in your tracks, and you watch Tobirama step back to observe what he did. You begin to taste bile at the back of your throat.

The body that he decapitated did not spray blood nor crumple to the ground, but it begins to be made whole. Ashes fly to it, remodelling the original form until it looks human.

You gasp, and Tobirama whirls around and sees you.

“What are you doing here?!” Tobirama demands.

His voice makes you step backwards.

The being regards you, and probably from the animosity of Tobirama’s voice, it reacts by charging towards you.

You let out a strangled scream, and your instincts make you step to the side, but before it can go near you, it is dispersed and a crumple piled of ashes fall to the ground.

You feel the burn of acid go up the back of your throat, and before you know it, you turn to your side and you begin to hurl your insides.

Your mind draws blank.

When you are done, you wipe the corner of your mouth and you look at Tobirama, who is regarding you with a cold expression.

“What is this?” You rasp out. Your eyes feel cold, and your hands are numb. “What did you do?”

Your gaze wanders through the lab, and you see corpses on the examination table, papers strewn on the floor, unraveled scrolls spread out over desks, and another corpse on the floor, covered in tags.

“Tobirama…” You trail off. Your heart drops heavily to your stomach.

Your husband dwells in the dark, my lady, and in the shadows, he plays god with the dead .

Tears begin to gather in your eyes, and your vision gets blurry.

Why don’t you just die and see what I mean?

“Did you...did you bring me back with this? You said I died…” You murmur in disbelief. And hurt.

Tobirama can see how repulsed you are and with that, he swallows back his emotions.

“Tobirama,” you snap, this time with anger. “What the hell is going on?”

Tobirama stares at you coolly, and you hate that expression of his. It is like he is in battle and he is analyzing the fight to come up with a brilliant strategy.

“I created a new jutsu,” he replies. “It is our safeguard. This can help us at war.”

Your eyes widen in horror and you step towards him. “Help us? At war? There is no war! Isn’t it our goal to have no more wars? So we can stop fighting and go home alive ?!” You practically scream at him.

Tobirama is eerily calm and you loathe it. You know that he is shutting down. However, his words do not match his expression.

“Elder brother is dying,” he says quietly. “This is the only thing I can do.”

“No!” You shout.

“This jutsu,” Tobirama starts. “This will ensure that no more lives will suffer. This jutsu raises the dead to create an unstoppable army. Now tell me if that is not a good thing.”

You press a hand to your eyes, trying to drive away the images of the corpses around you.

“They are just dead bodies,” Tobirama says, detached. “They are dead . I can control them.”

“No, shut up!” You snap. “What did it take? Huh? What did it take for your good thing to happen?”

Tobirama’s eyes narrow. “If you are disgusted, then you are free to leave.” He crosses his arms. “When Hashirama is gone, this village will be vulnerable.”

“Your brother is dying, and this is what you do? Make a solution to bring him back alive?” You step closer to him, and Tobirama backs off in surprise.

He expects you to run off and to leave him.

“There is no cure,” he finally snaps. He wanted you to go because it is easier to deal with what he has done without you.

“Then why do you spend so much time with the dead? Why can’t you go and spend time with him? For the gods’ sakes, he is out there!” You put your hands on him and you push him back. “Tobirama, do you even hear how insane you sound? How can you rationalize this? Are your dead brothers just dead bodies, then? Our baby girl? My late students?!”

Tobirama takes it, and his face breaks open with the emotions he has been holding back.

“This is the only thing I can do! The only way to make sure this village is protected! If my brother goes, then the world becomes our enemy!”

“Senju Tobirama!” You scream on top of his voice, and it silences him for a moment. “Is there no end to this?!”

Tobirama glares at you, and you cannot unhear how broken he sounds. He finally loses it. “THERE IS NO END!” He explodes, and his voice rings in the room.

You take your hands and you slam them against his chest, once, twice, with you biting back your tears. The two of you are breathing hard, and you feel Tobirama’s heartbeat underneath your palm. You ball your hands into a fist and you slam them against his chest again, unable to say anything else.

“Why don’t you go?” Tobirama pleads. “Please, just go. Leave me alone, leave me be!”

You let your tears fall from your eyes. “You, Senju Tobirama, have no faith in yourself, and you are breaking my heart. You set up this world, you made it so that we can have peace, and we will continue to work on that. Peace is not all about strength!”

You meet his eyes. “You are wise. You are brilliant, and all the good things a shinobi must be!”

Tobirama shakes his head, feeling his eyes prick with tears. His chest tightens painfully. “I have not done enough!”

You grab the front of Tobirama’s shirt and you clutch it harder. You feel like if you let go, you will lose him to this madness. “Nothing will never be enough, not in this lifetime or the next!”

Tobirama grabs your wrists. “How can you say that?”

“Because we will never know what happens next! We are only humans, Tobirama. If you are a god, then by all means, raise the dead, bring back our dead child, control everything you can control.”

The two of you fall into silence.

Tobirama wanted you to turn away because he does not know how to handle the grace you are giving him. He did not want to deal with your disappointment, so he wanted you to feel repulsed.

However, he is met with understanding and compassion, and he cannot wrap his head around that. He wants to flee.

Tobirama’s forehead falls to yours, and you feel his tears on your cheeks. “ Elder brother is dying,” he finally says, but it is with acceptance. “He’s...going to leave me.”

It breaks his heart. Nothing can ever prepare him for Hashirama’s death. He still needs his elder brother. They are one hell of a duo–there is nothing in this world they cannot accomplish. He does not want to be alone, or be left behind. No matter how much he isolates himself, he values his family above all, and there is nothing in this world that he wants other than for his family to thrive and to be happy.

“Yes,” you tell him quietly. “But he is out there.”

You grab Tobirama’s face, and you make him face you. “And he needs you to bring him back home, alright?”

Tobirama stares at you, looking painfully lost. It is a rare sight to see him so vulnerable. “I do not know what to do. I do not know. I have spent all my life knowing, and I don't-I don't know anymore.”

You feel his exhaustion in his body and his words, the way your touch makes him lean further towards you and give in.

“Yes, you do,” you reassure him, and you caress his high cheekbones with your thumb. “Yes, you do. So go to him.”

Tobirama shakes his head, and he places his big hands over yours. “I am sorry.”

You know how heavy the crown Tobirama wears, how it bears down on him that it drives him insane. It is not like his fears for the future are unfounded. You understand where he is coming from, but you cannot stand here and let him waste away giving his life effort among the dead. You understand so much that it hurts. The pain of being on fire pales in comparison to this.

You wipe his tears away. “And...I love you. No matter what.”

Tobirama squeezes your hands, but he is still looking down at the distance between the two of you. “That is terribly naive of you.”

“Well, you know me,” you whisper.

“Thank you,” Tobirama murmurs, and finally, he feels a kind of peace settle over his shoulders. It is a comfort that he will spend the rest of his life with you.

He knows that he cannot waste your grace, and he will do whatever he can to be worthy of it.

Tobirama kisses your forehead, and you close your eyes as he pulls you into his arms. When you open them, you are back in your own home, and he takes off to go find his brother.

You wait for Tobirama’s return in the engawa, the cold morning air of near dawn making your nose runny. It smells of dew now, and the sky is beginning to turn into a lighter shade of blue that makes you see the green of the grass and the leaves of the trees. You stare off into the distance, worrying for him, but you know that he will be back. He has always made good on that promise.

Finally, the gate opens and you see Tobirama walk in.

He pauses from where he is and he looks to you. You see the shadows on his face that cuts his features into sharp details–the way his cheeks hollow and his jaw juts out like a knife–he is always beautiful, no matter what.

“I told my brother about the Edo Tensei,” he tells you the moment he gets closer. “We are going to seal it away, and make it a Forbidden jutsu.”

“That, you should,” you reply wryly. It has been a very long night. “It cannot fall to the wrong hands.”

“Yes,” Tobirama agrees.

The two of you make your way towards your bedroom, and once you are in the confines of your bedroom, your walls fall away. Tobirama walks to the corner of the room, his back to you. The two of you let the silence settle, and you approach him, and quietly slide your arms around his waist and lean your head on the space between his shoulder blades.

Tobirama lets out a long sigh, and he rests his arms over yours.

“What do we do next?” Tobirama asks quietly.

“We don’t have to do anything just yet,” you reply, and you plant a kiss on his back.

Tobirama turns to face you and slides his arm around your waist and sidles you up against him. Tobirama’s tired eyes pore over yours, and the hardness of his stature fades away. He melts into you, and he finds your lips against his.

Tobirama pulls away, and he grazes a thumb over your cheek. “Okay.”

“Okay.” You blink at him.

Tobirama leans towards you again, and he kisses you softly. Slowly, he walks the two of you to the bed, and he gently lays you down on your back.

Your fingers trail down to the hem of his shirt, and you draw it towards you to take it off. Tobirama tosses his clothing aside, and he leans over you again, his naked torso pressing against yours.

“You cried,” you whisper, your fingers tracing the bone over his eyebrow.

“You did as well,” Tobirama murmurs.

“Don’t you ever ask me to leave you,” you rest your palm on his cheek. “Then, I will really cry.”

“I told you not to cry over me,” Tobirama rolls to his side, bringing you along with him.

“How could I not? Quit asking me for impossible things.”

Tobirama stares at the ceiling, unsure of what to say next. He clutches you to him like an anchor locking its ship to one place.

“I want to do right by you, and my brother, and this village,” Tobirama starts, his voice low in his chest. “But I get lost in it. This world is too harsh, and sometimes it takes a mile to move an inch.”

“Will you still stand by me, after everything?” Tobirama glances down at you.

You hold Tobirama and you press your cheek against his shoulder hard. These words are binding, but it is your vow with him. Come what may, but it is with readiness you face these challenges with him. You see him clearly, and you are only beginning to get the scope of what he is prepared to lay down to protect those he loves. He is flawed, and you acknowledge that. You know that your husband is capable of making the hardest moves even if the world will hate him for it. You will not always agree with him, but you believe in his vision and the way he hopes the world can be in the future.

And that makes him human. Perhaps more than anyone you have ever met or have known in your life.

The thing is, there is no black and white in the lens that Tobirama sees the world in. You have learned that not everything is simple, that some things just cannot be fixed no matter how hard you search for answers.

The two of you need to accept that in order to move on.

“Until death do us part,” you whisper to him.

END.

coming soon: “touch your heart” (their first meeting and how they fell in love)

#angelica writes #Tobirama Senju #Senju Tobirama #senju tobirama x you #senju tobirama x reader #tobirama x you #tobirama x reader #'til death do us part #you never said goodbye timeline/au #naruto fanfiction

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mira--mira · 3 years

Note

One obvious for the ask game. The main protagonist; Naruto Uzumaki and Izuku Midoriya.

@shiryusamarkanda it’s so nice to hear from you again! <3

I totally didn’t forget to post this and had it fully finished in my drafts for days...totally.

Naruto

What I love about them:

Naruto's a bratty kid who’s not afraid to speak up and challenge something he thinks is "wrong". This, of course, is part 1 Naruto. I actually like when he's a bit insensitive without being explicitly malicious bc its very fitting for his background/how he grew up but also gives him a clear path forward as he learns how to work as a team/starts to grow. It wasn’t exactly a smart move, but I really liked how he continued to challenge Zabuza in the Wave Arc saying “he’s still my enemy” after Kakashi told him to back off. This is all good and strong characterization that, to me, was more often endearing than it wasn’t. Naruto had goals and a purpose and in early Naruto that was still clear.

What I hate about them:

Part 2 (Shippuden) Naruto. There’s a lot that goes into this but the core deviation is getting away from the underdog story. In Shippuden Naruto is the son of the 4th, the Child of Prophecy, a reincarnation of the Sage of Six Path’s kid, makes friends with Kurama, and has the most OP power of the them all: Talk no Jutsu. What makes all of this even worse is Naruto went from a loveable bratty kid to an insufferable messiah figure. To be “perfect” his natural personality is shorn down until he’s only allowed occasional “stupid” mistakes rather than mistakes that emerge from his characterization. This also makes his ideological “wins” with villains...completely meaningless. Shippuden Naruto doesn’t really...have beliefs. He wants to be hokage and bring Sasuke back to the village. “Being hokage” was fine as a kid but I expected the progression into shippuden to be “what kind of hokage do I want to be?” This seemed natural bc we get in the Wave arc Naruto pushing against “what a shinobi is supposed to be: a tool” from Haku and declaring he’d make his own ninja way. Flashforward to the chunin arcs: hates Orochimaru for messing with Sasuke (esp when he eventually leaves to join him) and Neji for treating Hinata the way he did until he learned more about the Hyuga before declaring it wasn’t fair and you had to fight against fate and destiny. Tsunade’s arc was more about reemphasizing the village was something worth protecting and the Sasuke retrieval arc, while focused on Sasuke, at least kept up this theme. But these moments of growth are only alluded to in shippuden and by the time the war arc and ending come around...nothing changes. Naruto didn’t upset the status quo, he only maintained it. And once that ending was established it was a lot easier to go back and pick out exactly when his characterization started to fall through and the weird messiah figure took over instead. Part of this, imo, is the focus of his ultimate goal being “bring Sasuke back to the village” rather than understand what Sasuke is doing/why he’s doing it and then deciding to help him or stop him.

Favorite Moment/Quote:

“You’re cute when you’re chubby” [in reference to the frog purse]

I really love the quiet moments Naruto has and watching him live out his daily life. The frog purse is absolutely adorable and I love seeing it crop up time and time again. A close second is when Gai kicks Jiraiya in the face and, a short time later, offers Naruto the green tracksuit which he’s appreciative of.

What I would like to see more focus on:

In Part 2 Naruto having a long-term goal alongside bringing Sasuke back to the village or trying to seriously think about why Sasuke does what he does and how that would potentially affect the plot. If I could go back to the very start, keeping the actual heart and intent of an underdog ninja story rather than everything turning into superpowered mecha/kaiju battles and aliens from space this is the big point that I’d want to address. In general, I really like fics that focus on training and give him a range of jutsu besides spamming shadow clones and rasengan variants. I’ve said this before, but if Naruto really wants to keep the “number 1 unpredictable ninja” moniker, learning a variety of small, diverse jutsu and using them in interesting/creative ways would be the way to go rather than spamming the aforementioned two. I also really like fics that buckle down and just go ham and create their own variety of jutsu, especially if it’s small practical jutsu rather than the latest and greatest OP Power #839281 kind of jutsu.

What I would like to see less focus on:

The messiah figure. Talk no Jutsu. The obsession with having a morally pure hero in a world that routinely employed child soldiers and put them in war. I understand Naruto was a shonen manga first and foremost but like...this was the setting/world Kishimoto decided on having. However, I will say some fics take it to far on the other extreme for my taste, creating a edgy nihilistic Naruto that hates everyone and everything.

Favorite pairing with:

Uhh...I don’t actually have a strong feeling for this one LOL. The most I’ve read has been SasuNaru (Sasuke x Naruto) because I’ve found really interesting set-ups. I like the ship and it does have a decent amount of backing in canon but it’s the little moments (or my ability to see possible little moments) that really make or break a ship for me. SasuNaru is all Big Declarations and I struggle to see how they’d actually settle down post Shippuden time into something sustainable. My favorite iterations of the ship is focused when they’re genin age and have a better relationship...but then I recognize that this is getting closer and closer to Hashimada. The other big things I run into with shipping Naruto with Sasuke is 1. Sasuke needs a shit ton of therapy/willingness to process his family related trauma and 2. Naruto needs a good support network/family outside of a romantic partner because it personally makes me uncomfortable to read ‘you’re my one and only’ (here being: I have no other friends, family, loved ones outside of you). It’s a ship that can work but it’s not my personal OTP.

Favorite friendship:

Canon/OoT - Naruto & Sakura

I do have a softspot for fics where Naruto realizes his crush on Sakura is actually a desire to have friends/someone to care about him and then they do become close. In canon Sasuke was clearly the favorite of Kakashi (if chunin arc is kept the same/similar and he takes him away for the month to train) I really like Naruto and Sakura sticking together and trying to help each other. They’re both loud and can wind each other up but Naruto can help Sakura relax a bit from her rigid view of herself and she can help keep him on track/encourage him.

NOTP:

Again, no real strong opinions here. Probably harems? I remember seeing a lot of those a couple years ago and I fundamentally dislike the harem so it will never be ‘done well’ to my personal taste.

Favorite headcanon:

Naruto is smart, he just needs things to be explained in a way he can understand.

I’m not a fan of ‘he’s the smartest person in the entire world’ trope but Naruto is creative, he created the oiroke jutsu before he graduated to genin and has a lot of stubborn determination. He’s just really bad at typical ‘book learning’ and traditional testing and he’s not a genius/prodigy like Sasuke or Neji.

Read line for BNHA manga spoilers

Izuku

What I love about them:

He’s such a smart kid and while he’s unsure/insecure about himself he still does his best. Honestly the premise of BNHA is amazing and I was so excited to watch this little quirky (heh) boy do his best and outthink heroes, utilizing his intelligence and knowledge of quirks. I really love early Izuku and how he has to approach situations from a different angle bc he grew up quirkless/can’t properly handle OFA. The sports festival arc remains one of my personal favorites and really showed his ingenuity. I also really love that Izuku is openly emotional, he cries, he gets super happy about things, he’s angry, he’s sad, etc.

What I hate about them:

Why do stories insist on calling themselves “underdogs” when for a majority of the time, they’re not? Or not as much as they would be from the original premise? Look, TDP came about exactly bc BNHA was billed as ‘quirkless boy becomes number 1 hero’ it changed rapidly into ‘Izuku gets the strongest quirk but can’t control it’ and while I was...disappointed with that, it happened so quickly I wasn’t really upset. Fast forward to apparently OFA has...what seven(?) quirks inside it and I just...it’s frustrating. Even more the longer we go the more Izuku strays away from a character that is forced to use his intelligence and creatively outthink his opponents and instead becomes...I just have to hit him harder! The Muscular fight already inched towards this but the Overhaul fight just felt like Super Shonen Smack-down 728329. Which, isn’t an inherent problem, it just doesn’t match up to the expectations I had about BNHA I had at the start and how I hoped the series would go. For a character trait that I hate: Izuku is stupidly self-sacrificing. It makes sense with his character but he shoots beyond what is safe and reasonable and I wish there would be more internal emphasis on the question “is it better to save one person today if it meant I couldn’t save ten people tomorrow?” I think he’d choose the former or forsake the question altogether (we touched briefly on this during the overhaul arc with Eri) but I think it’s a serious question needs to be touched on (or I just need to go back and rewatch things again LOL)

Favorite Moment/Quote:

See entire sports festival arc. I don’t really have a favorite moment because I love the entire arc and we get so much out of it.

What I would like to see more focus on:

Quirkless Izuku. There’s already a lot of fics, but I really do love them. It deviates a bit, but I do like the creativity of giving Izuku his own unique quirk and then exploring what he can do with that/how it changes canon. Really I want Izuku to keep his original characterization and not trade his smarts for more punching power or deus ex machinas for quirks hidden inside of OFA. If OFA!Izuku is kept, I like story ideas where he still has to rely on means outside of his quirk. Preferably this is isn’t because he injuries himself so much, but I like toying with the idea that Izuku never gets OFA to All Might’s level so he really does have to make the quirk his own and still rely heavily on his intelligence and quirk journals to become the number 1.

What I would like to see less focus on:

Quirks hidden inside OFA. Strength should have been enough, it was already billed as the most powerful quirk of all. I know this is a common theme for shonen stories, and I don’t mean to harp specifically on Izuku, but again the premise of BNHA was an underdog story.

Favorite pairing with:

Tododeku (Todoroki Shouto x Midoriya Izuku)

Friends to lover and battle couples lads, I am weak to them. I like the contrast between their personalities as well as origins (Shouto being the number 2′s (now 1) kid and Izuku from a quiet civilian background). At the end of the sports festival arc both of them are extremely well characterized and it’s easy for me to imagine how their relationship progresses from there and how they can support each other and help each other grow. It’s a very sweet and wholesome ship the way I write and read it and it’s v cute.

Favorite friendship:

Canon- Midoriya Izuku & Uraraka Ochaco & Iida Tenya

I really like the core trio and think their interactions are really sweet. They balance each other out well and their friendship was immediately believable to me. I also like later when Tsuyu and Shouto start to get included in the group and out of the “main” core friends I’m endlessly entertained whenever Izuku and Tokoyami interact with one another. (This is also because I love my bird son, but you know.)

TDP - Midoriya Izuku & Ashido Mina or Midoriya Izuku & Hatsume Mei

Really, I love all of TDP’s kiddos interactions. Their chemistry is one of my favorite things about the fic and all the villain school kiddos meshed really well and had hilarious interactions. Mina and Mei are my faves but just barely. Mina came out of left field for the fic but she plays a similar role that Ochaco does in canon as a usual source of positivity (but unlike Ochaco with additional chaos). She’s Izuku’s first real friend even before starting HIVVE and wouldn’t hesitate to call Izuku her cousin as she views him as family. In return, Mina’s someone Izuku can completely count and depend on if necessary. Mei is...Mei. Izuku is her best “useful customer” and it’s actually terrifying how similar their thoughts are, just Mei has an (un)healthy dose of Hazmat’s insanity and her own business acumen added into the mix. They have slightly different fields of interest but are intellectual equals that work well together and that’s something new to both of them.

NOTP:

Bakudeku (Bakugo Katsuki x Midoriya Izuku)

It’s unhealthy. Unless it’s an AU that changes what the start of their relationship is like, Bakugo and Izuku will always have a toxic friendship to me and I can’t ever see them in a healthy relationship. Both of them have a lot to learn and I am of the opinion that Bakugo should get the opportunity to grow and become a good person and leave behind his past as a bully. However, I’m also of the opinion that no matter how good of a person a bully becomes their victim is never required to absolve them of past wrongdoings. Izuku and Bakugo were friends once, their relationship turned toxic, and now it’s in the interest of both of them to grow apart from one another. I even hesitate to really say they’ll be friends again because the early characterization of their relationship was so imbalanced to me, but for the right author and the right work I may see them being on good terms. It’s still a romantic relationship that I dislike.

Favorite headcanon:

Crack headcanon? Izuku does have a natural quirk, the force of his tears is clearly superpowered 😂 Regular headcanon, (that is canon in TDP and kindaaa in regular canon(?)) when Izuku gets really engrossed in a super stressful fight he focuses on what will work rather than what is moral. It has...mixed results.

For the ask game.

#shiryusamarkanda #naruto #bnha #mha #naruto uzumaki #izuku midoriya #my fics #the diverging path #out of time #spoliers #bnha manga spoliers #asks

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shikadainara · 3 years

Text

an in-depth breakdown of b*ruto episode 178

sorry i’m late i was lost on the path of life

tl;dr yeah ok i can have my hopes and dreams about what specifically i would want but. BUT. honestly yeah the episode was more or less what i expected would actually be in it from the preview, so i can’t complain. i still sobbed!!! that’s all i really wanted!!

time to rewatch it! (warning: long post. LOL)

obviously this is nothing new but i still can’t get over how nice the exterior to the nara household is, good for them. i don’t think i noticed the solar panel before? good for them!

i’m entertained at how the episode does open with shikadai tying his hair as he walks, i just think it’s neat. i love how the camera frames it like seeing a nara with their hair down is something forbidden we’re not mean to see

temari has purple slippers i dedicate her commitment to her favorite color. (also i am Just Saying... purple........ the bisexual flag--)

yeahhhh ok so. i get the need for wanting to frame the narrative like this, but this really doesn’t make any sense. shikadai is 12, and is also a chuunin, like... he should know by now that his dad is always kinda a mess on this day of the year, and why that is. and even if he honestly really did just forget, the fact that he’s still asking his dad why he’s not at work while looking at the way his parents are dressed... did this not clue you in or what????

the fact that shikamaru’s up and ready (i really don’t think he gets much sleep on this day, every year...), and it’s shikadai who’s just getting up. i do think it’s cute that we do get to see a tiiiiiny bit of temari’s parenting that doesn’t involve being an out of character irrationally angry woman when she tells shikadai to not come crying to her when he’s late in getting ready, yeah that definitely sounds way more like her lol

temari says she told him about all of this the other day (shikadai blatantly forgot, he tries to pretend he didn’t but she doesn’t press him for it)... that does make me emotional thinking like. she is pretty painfully aware of how hard this is on shikamaru, and days in advance told shikadai about it, to try to make sure he understands what his father is going through........ she really does care about him so, so much.

i said this based off the preview, but... i would like to interpret that temari is purposefully doing the dishes(/rest of house chores) to give him space to grieve.......

the fact that while explaining what today is, shikamaru has to get up, leave the room, and talk while not facing his family, as if he wouldn’t be able to say the words as easily while looking at them........ god. that. that hurts.

tsunade being the one to give this speech kinda feels random? like yeah she was the one that was kage during the war but...? i do feel like it would have been more fitting to have naruto say the speech since the whole entire point of the war was to protect him (and bee) but ????? ok

no one in the uzumaki family talks during this episode which is fine by me LOL. i would assume the memorial is on the day the war ended (which would also make it naruto’s birthday/memorial of the kyuubi invasion) but if it is, it’s never stated. maybe it’s the day the war started, idk

the collection of people up front feels pretty random??? kakashi as the previous hokage, sure, guy i guess because of how important his contribution the war against madara was and also because he is kakashi’s husband, shizune kinda has to be there if tusnade is, but... iruka? like yeah he is vital to the narrative, but to konoha? he is the headmaster of the academy i think now so i guess...? but then? ibiki??? anko??? i say this as someone that REALLY loves anko, she was my favorite character as a kid and i still love her but,,, huh? SHE WAS KNOCKED OUT DURNG THE WHOLE WAR!!??!?

then you see everyone that was in naruto’s class + team guy + sai except hinata is in the crowd. which of course to the narrative, to us the readers, those are the main characters (if you ignore how more or less everyone was super shafted throughout all of part 2) but!!! team guy’s only real connection to the rest of them is that they took the chuunin exams together, and neji and hinata were are cousins. that’s about it. was it that specifically all of these characters made such a contribution to the war compared to every other single shinobi from konoha that lived ??????

shikamaru staring up to the sky did made my heart clench... no matter how different he is now than he was when he was a 12 year old genin...... i do feel like he’s never entirely ditched his true self of just wanting to stare at the clouds all day.... i’m not entirely sure what the intent was here, but i’m sure there’s supposed to be some symbolism here. the sky is actually nearly entirely clear (the way is framed, there’s only a tiny cloud in the corner,) and then he closes his eyes and hums. maybe it’s supposed to be about the closure he gets in this episode...

ok and then here’s ao cool whatever. since i only skim through b*ruto for the characters that i care about i do not really careeeee since i won’t watch again until something interesting happens to said characters that i care about LOL

?? who voiced the receptionist they sound familiar but i can’t place it at all

katasuke is the bitch that made the scientific ninja tool for b*ruto so he could cheat in the exam right

what is ao doing here. is he supposed to be doing something evil. it sure looks that way

... who is the glasses orange scarf guy??? he kinda looks like a mix between udon and ebisu and aoba but i know he’s not any one of them lol

TEMARI AND KARUI STANDING NEXT TO EACH OTHER... i don’t think in any media they’ve ever??? ACTUALLY TALKED TO EACH OTHER???? BUT THEY SHOULD BE CLOSE FOR THE OBVIOUS REASON....... I’LL TAKE THESE CRUMBS THOUGH THANK YOU

OKKKKK admittedly like. in terms of Pleasing Me, Personally, it’s a damned if you do, dammed if you don’t situation like.... they do kinda HAVE to acknowledge that neji died during the war so. i appreciate that hinata like........ cares. i guess. i’ll try to not post the whole rant about why neji’s death was (logistically how he died aside) narratively and thematically absolute bullshit, kishi (i believe) saying that neji died so he could play cupid for naruto and hinata like!!! fuck off with that shit!!! maybe if it wasn’t for the goddamn “naruto-kun’s big warm manly hand” line i would feel a little bit actual sad but no.

WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOSHINO AND CHOUZA HELLO!?!?!?!? COULD YOU REALLY NOT HAVE PUT THEM IN THE CROWD??

ino also has an unnamed mother that the anime made up that i believe was only in like a single episode (and was cameoed in RtN i think?) but she should still be like. Alive. so her too.

MITSUKI PLACING FLOWERS IS SO FUNNY TO ME LIKE YOU DO KNOW YOUR PARENT’S SUBORDINATE/DOUBLE CROSS TRAITOR WHATEVER DID CAUSE THE WAR RIGHT BFIOBU*EHW$

aaand. here’s shikamaru and ino’s conversation. i’m not sure if i can put this into words, but... just... the way that they talk to each other, the weight of 15+ years of sadness about this, the way that they just!! fully know what the other is going through, the way that they’ve known each other for their whole lives and survived through everything together, the way i feel like they’ve avoided talking about this topic as much as possible over the years, hell even during this conversation the way they’re almost bickering to avoid having to directly confront their feelings, but it is unavoidable.......

i also do wonder what their relationship with each other’s parents were while growing up: shikamaru does refer to inoichi as “inoichi-san” here, contrast to how their kids all call each other’s parents just “uncle” or “aunt”

siri play sad naruto flute.

ok since i did go back to rewatch the episode from shippuden right before watching this one for the first time i do wish a liiiittle less of the episode was about this flashback with the same reused footage like i get that they do have to put it in here but Still.

THE FACT THAT SHIKAMARU IS SMILING WHILE RECALLING WHAT HAPPENED, AND THAT THERE’S A LAUGH IN HIS VOICE........ I WANT TO CRY AGAIN

ino saying that it was so unfair how cool they looked in the end, and then giggles...... ino............. this must be so, so painful for her to recall, and yet.........

IT IS SO FUNNY HOW THEY SKIP OVER THE IMAGE OF SASUKE THERE AHAHAHAHA god i hated that so so much i can’t believe that’s manga canon. the line is perfectly fine and makes me cry just DO NOT RELATE IT TO SASUKE!!!! literally the only time they “”interact”” is when ino is introduced and ino just, for lack of a better word, glomps him???? THAT’S IT??? i feel like they might’ve changed it just because, well, you know the endgame pairings. but still. bye sasuke

damn you know what i do kinda wish they didn’t skip over the “get rid of that box before your mother finds it” part i AM curious as to what it was i mean it’s implied it’s something adult related so SP probably couldn’t show that on TV BUT!!!

ok ok all week i tried to not imagine what shikamaru and ino’s conversation would be since i wanted to go all “surprise me!!” BUT??? BUT. SHIKAMARU ASKING INO IF SHE THINKS THAT THEIR FATHERS HONESTLY, TRULY BELIEVED IN THEM?? HE’S BEEN THINKING ABOUT THAT ON EVERY SINGLE DAY THIS YEAR THESE PAST 15+ YEARS, AND SURELY IT’S ALWAYS BEEN AT THE BACK OF HIS MIND ALL THIS TIME!?!?! of course. OF COURSE HE WOULD FEEL THIS WAY!!! HE’D HAVE NO WAY OF KNOWING FOR SURE OR EVER FINDING OUT!!! like of course we as the readers know that shikaku and inoichi absolutely 200% felt that way but... from his perspective... you know what i don’t even think this idea ever crossed my mind HOLD ON THAT IS THE SOUND OF MY HEART SHATTERING--

and then he just... smiles. says that he won’t let that get him down, since it’s not like they’ll ever find out anyways. sure, it’s been 15+ years, he has had to have largely come to terms with everything by now, but...... still....

then he talks about the idea that the day will come and leave everything in the hands of their sons (now looking over at team 10′s turn to place flowers) just like their dads did... it is worded like a question, but showtaro morikubo’s absolute masterful performance does. it does portray a tone like he is absolutely 100% sure that it’ll happen, one day...

i’ve said this before but. i KNOW shikamaru has definitely spent so much time thinking about this. sure it hasn’t ever really been brought up on-screen (yet), but....... i want to see him talking about a direct contrast on what his grand plan through life he thought of by age 12, ending with him passing away by old age. obviously he did a complete 180 on they type of person he wanted as a wife LOL. it is kinda brought up at the start of shikamaru hiden while he visits the grave, says he hasn’t found anyone he’d give his life to protect... (well. now he has a son where if you see the recent chapters he is very, VERY protective of.) but i would like to see this change in his character be directly be brought up and examined

........ that being SAID. i sure hope neither of them actually like. die. i’m GOOD, thank you. they sure as hell can’t until they’re ready to pass things down to their sons, at least. until then, absolutely zero narrative reason to do so, but...... still. we don’t need to make everything an EXACT copy of what happened in naruto you can let them live kthx

they both say “what kind of half-baked response is that!” and then laugh just. I LOVE THEM SO SO MUCH TEAM 10 IS FOREVER

there is some symbolism in how ao walks over from a really dark shadowy area into the light when he decides that he has to pay his respects...

i do like how he does reflect on how he really should have come here earlier, but better late than never i suppose

i was expecting a... more elaborate explanation for how he lived??? especially since he was standing RIGHT NEXT to shikaku and inoichi... he just. happened to survive for whatever reason while every single other person died on impact

that survivor’s guilt does hurt to see

i do like seeing how he chooses to do something with his life, aside from being a shinobi, and live it to the fullest for the sake of everyone that died in the explosion. that’s nice

ino saying “i’m sure are fathers are happy!” AAAAAAAAAAA

IN HINDSIGHT....... I ABSOLUTELY SOULD’VE PREDICTED SOMEONE WOULD DROP A “YOU LOOK SO MUCH LIKE YOUR FATHER” AT SOME POINT IN THE EPISODE...... and. i did kinda chuckle, because like, no shit duh lmao. i’m sure shikamaru heard that all the time as a kid!!! and hell, i’m sure he still gets it from time to time over the years up to this day. BUT LIKE... SHIKAMARU’S FACE. HE LOOKS LIKE THAT, RIGHT NOW, IT’S ACTUALLY SOMETHING HE REALLY, REALLY NEEDED TO HEAR. LET ME CRY

hearing shikamaru say oyaji, and then the way his tone suddenly shifts to something very... quiet and somber? when he says “nara shikaku”..... something about that. man.... also it’s hard to see but there is a sweat drop on his face as he says all of this...

“sometimes, i end up wondering...” don’t lie to yourself. you think about this so, so much........

the flashback where ao says “listen to me calmly” when he says the bomb is coming this way sure reminds me of ino telling shikamaru to stay calm as she tells him that his son has a bomb around his neck

THE ADDED PART OF THE FLASHBACK WITH THEIR VERY LAST MOMENTS...... THE WAY THEY’RE SMILING AND JUST??? BELIEVE IN THEIR KIDS IN THE VERY END. just like how it’s described in shikamaru hiden where the narrative says that shikaku was a shinobi until his very last breaths-- actually, no. in the very end he was a father.......

“THEY BELIEVED IN YOU, WITHOUT A HINT OF DOUBT.”

AAA?A?AAAAAAAAA?A?A?A??A!??!!??!!

INO STARTS TEARING UP BUT I CALL ABSOLUTE BS THAT SHIKAMARU WOULDN’T ALSO JUST BURST ONTO TEARS ON THE SPOT, HE MAY BE 32 WHATEVER YEARS OLD NOW BUT... HE IS STILL SUCH A CRYBABY AT HEART, HIS ENTIRE CIRCLE OF LOVED ONES KNOW THIS.

you know who DID start crying though??? ME

i do wonder, is this the same hillside that shikamaru went to after asuma’s death...? (only in the manga tho, the anime had him on a rooftop instead)

is that??? someone watching them in the back left?? when shikadai finds him? i cannot tell what that is

i am. trying to follow temari’s logic of telling shikadai to go find shikamaru and... not also going with him?? i mean i figured from the preview that, yeah it does look like it’s only the two of them, but... i can’t come up with a reason. not a super big deal but. obviously my heart yearns for that shikatema content that’s ok i can write my own fanfic i guess!!!!

also like...... i imagine it can’t be THAT hard to find him, i’m sure that he only has a small handful of Spots Good For Coping(™) when he just needs to be by himself, that i would Think his wife would know where they are. and said wife would tell shikadai. but idk

after all of this, shikamaru wants to just treat his son to go eat out whatever he wants...!! what a good father

....... now like. the logic of “temari is currently making dinner and that’s why she’s a) not there and b) told shikadai to go fetch is father” would make perfect sense. but... if they’re going out to get food then... no?? shikadai would interject to say so if that was the case..... that makes this all make no sense seriously what the hell is she doing

i do wish that like. shikadai like.... uh. actually learned about more shikaku?? this scene is more brief than i thought it would be idk i felt like it would be part of the middle of the episode and not at the end, oh well. he’ll find out in due time

THAT BEING SAID... STILL. THE ENDING WHERE HE JUST CARES SO SO SO SO MUCH ABOUT SHIKADAI!!!! WONDERING IF HE’S WATCHING HIS BACK!!! I LOVE THEM I LOVE THEMMMMM

not quite sure whatever ao is doing at the end of the episode???? IS IT EVIL??? i mean like that it’s him catching a leaf seems like he’s going against konoha but i mean konoha fucking sucks so. that is not evil i guess LOL

whatever not like i’ll care to actually find out!!!!! anyways let me know when the nara family (or anyone adjacent to them) does anything so i can care LOL

in conclusion. good shit.

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queentargary3n · 4 years

Text

tournament for Sakura’s hand III

SasuSaku fanfic - crack canon FF.net Part II

Naruto took Sasuke to his newlywed home right after the end of their discussion with Kakashi. He didn’t tell Sasuke right away what his plan to “help him” was, he was sure Sasuke would try to stop him anyway, although Sasuke didn’t seem to be the jealous type, since leaving a girl who you like behind for two years when she is one of the most beautiful and popular girls of the village doesn’t actually seem to show it, his brooding friend seemed incredibly flustered. Naruto thought Sakura would put a stop to the tournament if Sasuke were to go to her and tell her about his feelings, that is for certain; but there is a part of him, a protective, brotherly part of him, that made him want to see Sasuke work for her. She had suffered so much for this poor bastard, and although it wasn’t really his fault he was always such a jerk, Naruto couldn’t help but to want to see him suffer for her, even if it was just a little bit. Still Naruto thought he needed some sort of guarantee, just in case.

Once home, he told Hinata of the situation, her adorable face went completely red, eyes rimmed with tears as she bowed before Sasuke, and started muttering fast apologies.

“It’s not your fault Hina, it was Ino’s plan, right?” Naruto explained to her and Sasuke.

“Still, I was there, I should have stopped her” Hinata said apologetically.

“Nothing you can do now,” replied Sasuke.

“Amm…. There’s something I have to do,” Hinata mentioned rapidly, remembering something she could and would have to do. “I’ll be back… please make yourself at home Sasuke-kun” She grabbed a sweater and headed out the door before explaining.

She hurried to the Hyuga Estate, looking around for Neji. He had mentioned his intentions of participating in the tournament, for which she was glad before, she always thought Sakura would be a perfect match for Neji, even when she understood the feelings she harbored for Sasuke. But now that she knew Sasuke had feelings for her as well, she had to stop him.

“You can’t participate in the tournament!” She told him when she found him training in the Hyuga dojo.

“Hinata-sama…” He bowed before his cousin in greeting as it was expected of him in the Hyuga clan.

“Sasuke-kun… he is back in the village, and he has feelings for her too and –“ She tried to explain, but was interrupted by Neji.

“So what?” He asked. “You know that I’ve always thought she deserved better than him, besides, ever since you married Naruto, Hiashi-sama has been interested in reforming the Hyuga clan, he thinks me marrying Sakura-san is the perfect opportunity for us to expand our lineage”

“But you don’t like her like that” She interceded. Neji also deserved to marry someone he loved, not just marrying for duty.

“Actually I do, ever since she healed me during the war, she saved my life, and I always thought she became a wonderfully skilled kunoichi”

“That’s just not the same…” Hinata said while fiddling with her hands.

“There’s nothing I can do now Hinata-sama… if it ends up in a battle between the Uchiha and the Hyuga I’ll just have to show that the Hyuga are the strongest in the village”

Hinata lowered her head in defeat, she will have to put a stop to his cousin herself, she thought, and there is only one way to do that.

“I’d like to welcome everyone to Konoha, and to this very unique tournament” Kakashi announced to the audience in Konohagakure’s main arena, using a voice enhancement jutsu. The arena was filled to capacity with spectators from all countries and hidden villages. Kakashi couldn’t have predicted this type of response, but he had to admit, this much exposure was definitely beneficial for the village’s economy. He almost felt guilty for his former student... almost. “Due to the overwhelming response in participants, we are beginning this tournament Chunnin exams style, in the Forest of Death training field #44... but before we begin, how about some words from our reason to be here today, Haruno Sakura?”

Sakura shook her head no, vehemently. She had almost died of embarrassment when Ino first informed her of her whole tournament plan, then she was forced, again by Ino, into a ridiculously extravagant and uncomfortable dress, a red, low cut dress that reached lower than any cleavage she’d ever showed before, shiny with rhinestones and sparkles and god knows what else. She was made by Kakashi, who found her hiding at the hospital trying to avoid the whole charade, to bear witness to the madness in the Hokage podium, right in the spotlight, and now he wanted a speech?!

“Well then… let’s welcome the participants to the arena before they make their way to training field 44, come on in” Kakashi gestured and the crown erupted in applause.

Around 100 or so participants entered the area upon the Hokage’s call, in a formation, some were from varied hidden villages, others seemed not to have a ninja association.

“See the man in pelts and flashy outfit?” Kakashi whispered in Sakura’s ear, referring to man leading one of the lines of formation, tall and muscular, his long blond hair reached the middle of his back while two stripes framed his attractive face. She wondered why a man so attractive and obviously extravagant felt the need to compete for a common kunoichi. “He is the Daimyō’s son, and a favorite to win, apparently he is a boxer, and travels all around the world in competitions”

“Sensei!” she barked, upset over his enthusiasm.

Her eyes moved over the other participants, she spotted the characteristic red hair of Gaara, walking in formation flanked by his brother Kankuro and a suna shinobi she did not recognize.

“Woow the Kazekage is competing?!” she heard from someone in the audience. “Konoha took their princess, maybe their trying to take ours too” someone else responded.

“They’re calling you the Slug Princess now” Ino explained from behind her, giving her a knowingly wink.

“I thought that was just for Tsunade-sama…”

“Well as the heir of Tsunade, I think it’s fitting” Kakashi said meddling into their whispered conversation.

“But I still wonder why Gaara…” She started to ask but was interrupted.

“You’re the Slug Princess of Konoha, student of two Hokage, and a favorite to the future one, think about your status Sakura” He offered in explanation. It was true, when put like that, but still the thought made her uneasy.

She wasn’t able to consider it for long, since next she recognized the proud stance and orange coloring of said future Hokage, leading another line of formation, and standing next to him none other than his wife…. “Naruto, Hinata… WHAT ARE YOU DOING THERE!!? YOU TWO ARE ALREADY MARRIED!!!” Sakura shouted from the podium.

“Ammm…. Polygamiy is legal in Fire country!” Hinata answered, yelling atypically and blushing madly, drawing laughter from the audience and a few of the participants.

“Hinata-sama…” Neji said from where he was standing next to his cousin, face flushed as well in embarrassment, he was sure his uncle would choke if he’d heard such a statement.

Hinata knew she had to be the one to stop Neji, and when her husband informed her of his plan she knew she had to participate as well. She felt as if she was betraying Neji, but she also wanted to give Sakura the best chance possible.

“He he he I don’t know about Hinata here, but I’m here as the option that Sakura-chan marries no one” Naruto said after.

“NARUTO!” Ino yelled from behind Sakura. “You’re ruining everything!”

“Alright settle down…” said Kakashi. “I’m in charge here, and…” he added a pause for dramatic effect. “…I’ll allow it”

“Kakashi-sensei…” Sakura whispered, because although she was glad, that someone as strong as Naruto was the option to get out of this whole situation, she didn’t want to go back to where she started. Alone.

“You’ve been so distracted with all the flamboyant participants, that you haven’t noticed who’s standing in the back of the formation line” Ino whined, and subtly pointed at the raven-haired man in a black cloak. He stood last in line, and Sakura had to strain her eyes to make sure it was really him.

He was looking at the floor and then at the sky, refusing to meet her eyes as she looked at him for the first time in two years.

“Sasuke-kun is here….” She whispered mostly to herself.

“Yup, and participating for you hand in marriage, forehead!!” Ino shrieked excitedly, lightly elbowing her friend on the ribs.

Sakura couldn’t breathe, not only because the corset of her dress was stupidly tight, but because HE was there, in the flesh, in Konoha. “Ha… you know Sasuke-kun and Naruto would take any chance to show up their skills and fight each other” She waived with her hand dismissively, because it was the most obvious explanation.

“Whatever you need to tell yourself Forehead” The blonde raised her hands as if giving up. Ino didn’t want to admit to her friend just yet, this had been her plan all along. If it wasn’t for Naruto getting in the way…

Sasuke allowed himself one second to glance over at the pinkette he’d missed so much over the last two years. She looked so different from the last time he saw her, her hair was shorter and neater than he’d ever seen before, she seemed… more feminine and curvier, her waist looking ridiculously small, he wondered how it made sense that someone so dainty could break boulders with her fist. She was already looking at him when he got to her face, his gaze getting lost in those emerald green eyes of hers, a concerned smiled played lightly on her lips. Their eye contact seemed to last forever, as it always did whenever they met after a long time apart.

They mutual stare was only then interrupted by another participant’s loud declaration. “Sakura-san!!” Sasuke looked over the person responsible and spotted an Iwa shinobi screaming Sakura’s name at the top of his lungs, he looked to be much older than they were judging by the lines under his eyes. He had dark hair and a weak chakra signature, there seemed to be nothing remotely remarkable about this man, the thought.

“There hasn’t been a moment since the war that you haven’t been in my thoughts! Since that time on the tent… I know you rejected my love letter then, but if you are doing this now… it means that you no longer love the person you loved back then, so please reconsider!!”

“Morio? What…” Sakura began to question but wasn’t exactly sure how to address that confession.

Sasuke glared at the Iwa shinobi with distain. He had credited their time during the war to when he started to recognize his feelings for his pink haired teammate, and she’d been receiving love letters at the same time?! But the words of the man affected him deeply, was it true? Had she actually stopped loving him?

“Hey Bastard, say something too!” Naruto said to Sasuke, trying but failing to keep a low tone.

Sasuke moved his lips as to ask What?

“A love confession! You can’t lose to that dude!” Naruto said in his supposed whispered voice, with every participant around the two men looking listening in.

Sasuke shook his head no and muttered Shut up. He wasn’t about to proclaim love in front of an audience and a ridiculous situation like this. He as an Uchiha after all, and the Uchiha were much too cool for that.

“Sakura-sama!” another guy shouted, producing a gigantic sign with Sakura’s name on it. “I love you!” And so, every other participant started to revolt in proclamations of love and admiration.

Has Sakura always been this popular? Sasuke thought. It seemed like something he would have noticed, although in reality he had no idea, he vaguely recalled some irritating stalker she had back in their genin days, and also Lee’s insisting confessions, who didn’t seemed to be in the participants, much to his disappointment, a taijutsu only tournament for Sakura seemed to be right up his alley.

“If the participants could please go back to their formations and stay silent for a moment, that would be great” The Hokage spoke again, using the voice enhancement jutsu and silencing the crowd once more. “The rules are simple, to make things easier, you’ll be divided into groups of three and handed an Earth scroll or a Heaven scroll, you’ll need to obtain another group’s scroll and reach the tower with both an Earth and Heaven scroll within 24 hours to move to the next stage of the tournament, we added a few difficulties to the Forest of Death make this more Jōnin level, those participants who pass the first stage will then complete in one-to-one matches, until we find a winner, no ninjutsu, dōjutsu, genjutsu, senjutsu or fūinjutsu will be allowed. You cannot use chakra whatsoever, if any participant does, will be immediately disqualified. Please remember the proctors are watching your every move. Let’s begin!”

_______

Thank you so much if you are still reading this. Don’t forget to leave a comment with your thoughts. I really need to post longer chapters because I do want to finish this before March 28th. I’m also thinking of changing the title, I feel it sounds kind of dumb, what would you have named this fic?

Thank you again, I hope y’all are staying safe and healthy.

#sasusaku #sasusaku fanfic #sasusaku fanfiction #sasusaku fic #Sakura Haruno #sakura uchiha

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peepingtoad · 3 years

Text

||—@dokuhebi submitted:

They are at a bar, the evening is warm, the people are cheerful, the drinks are free, and they are surrounded by familiar and trusted faces. This is no time to be feeling more blue than the curaçao cocktail sitting in front of them. One of far too many in their light weight system. Loosening a tongue that was far too cutting and dangerous to be so honest. But then, they remind themself, they are also only in their twenties, and had already been swept up in the dealings of multiple wars, civil and global. Assignments since they were seven. Orphaned since they were six. So really - what right did any technicality the universe could offer have to tell them they ought to wait for the ‘appropriate time’? Their golden eyes are watching him, the way his hand fits around the entire glass, the way he so quickly gets through each drink - yet somehow seems to be more sober than the serpent. How the white hair framing his face moves with him when he laughs, the shape of his eyes and lips when he smiles, the little glances he steals between them and Tsunade. And if they were being fair - which they self admitted they were not, and refused to be - they may realize that for every glance he steals at Tsunade, he gives one to them. That every time he offers her a drink, he offers them one. That if both they and she were cold, he would forfeit his jacket and then his shirt so both of his team mates were content. It should be enough. But when was anything enough for the viper? Especially when they found themself brooding a little too much. Because that was perhaps, one thing no one had found the trick to saving them from. Not since the day their parents died. Not since they caught a glimpse at the monsters in this world, and became so haunted by the prospect, that they imagined these monsters even when all was peaceful. Tormented by a monster once real and now more commonly fabricated. So as they move the straw in their glass, stabbing at the drink more than indulging it, they can not help their quip. The moment their teammate makes some statement, promise or playful joke about keeping the serpent and Senju princess safe, their golden eyes snap up and away from their drink. Not at all within the realm of festivity as Tsunade and Jiraiya offered. No, their voice, regardless of the smile they offer that shows little more than teeth, is coated in venom and tactless query. “What if you could only save one of us?” It isn’t a fun question, it doesn’t hold any playfulness. It is far too real a possibility in their shinobi lifestyle, and it is far too accusing a question. Too timed. It had been plaguing them for the longest while. Not quite who he would rescue, for they are not afraid to protect themself out on the field. But instead, a backwards way of trying to dissect his mind and decisions to find out who he loved the most. And while any sensible person would perhaps find a quiet moment to ask the man such a thing in private, for a true confession, the serpent must set up a trap, and corner him. If they ask him one on one, he may just say he cared for them, to appease them. But how much more blocked in the man is when Tsunade sits beside the serpent, both team mates facing Jiraiya. Of course, they don’t pose it as something serious. No, they disguise it as one of their mistimed and socially inappropriate jokes. How they are accused of being cold, cruel and weird for their off beat demeanor. An easy hiding place, madness. “Say we both drank poison, and you only had one cure. Or we were both targeted by enemies, and you could only intercept one attack,” they ask, toying with their drink as they toy with him, acting much like a cat playing with a mouse before eating it, wanting franticness and panic, or there simply wasn’t any fun, “well? Who would you save?”

With a countenance as naturally severe as theirs, it’s always difficult to say whether Orochimaru is even having a good time or not; even with alcohol thrown into the mix, it makes them no more easy to read than if they were stone cold sober. The only thing working in Jiraiya’s favour is many years by their side, of knowing them and their ways, and knowing that periods of watchful silence (a different beast to their regular silence) tends to mean that there’s something unpleasant going on within that unfathomable mind of theirs.

And it’s just like Jiraiya to simply let them lie dormant when first he senses that this silence is indeed one of those silences, figuring that if they want to say something, they no doubt will. No doubt waiting for the perfect time to pipe up amid the pleasant buzz and clatter of patrons and bar staff.

Until then, however, Jiraiya has every intention of maintaining the levity of the evening as well as he possibly can—first of all, because it had been quite some time since they all had a short reprieve home, and second of all because they damn well deserved it. After months spent surrounded by the drab grey of Ame, whose ruined ground was by this point nought but scorched earth, blood and the rot of corpses pounded into a slurry by the relentless downpour… yeah, he very much ached for his home, and wanted to make some good memories here to tide them over once they were sent back into the fray.

Still, it’s only natural that given the state of the world around them and the overall horrific turn their lives had taken, conversation soon turns to lighter recollections of their exploits, the frankly insane things they’d survived so far, and the numerous ways they’d saved each other’s skins. After all, the name Densetsu no Sannin had spread like wildfire, right to the point where it had become very well known at home, where the familiar visages that greeted them were of the utmost awe and (far less familiar) respect.

So it had been a simple thing to stir up some excitement and revelry with wild tales, until the three of them were left alone once more to chat more freely as they were wont to. In hindsight, it’s always easier to play up the theatre of their feats when one isn’t currently in that place of peril, with death reaching out to wrap barbed tendrils around one’s throat and yank them flailing into the underworld—but even then, the tall tales sold to random patrons come with a certain lull afterwards, punctuated more noticeably by the stabbing of a straw against ice and glass than he’d paid heed to so far.

And when Orochimaru speaks up, which Jiraiya had been starting to expect was coming like the most quiet yet brutal storm, he only needs to see the smile before he realises it won’t be good.

The stirring of the drink, whose colour was dimming thanks to the ice melting faster than they were imbibing, creates a little whirlpool in the glass that Jiraiya finds himself equally as mystified by as the question at hand. Oh, how he feels like he’d somehow been shrunk down and trapped in that boozy vortex, being spun endlessly around by a cruel and relentless hand! The unfortunate fact of the matter is, he has no idea what they’re really thinking while asking this, which is probably clear in the suspicious quirk of his eyebrow, and yet his own tipsiness is enough that despite gripping his glass a little tighter, he’ll rise to the challenge.

He won’t let himself flounder and sweat, and he certainly won’t let whatever game was being played get under his skin… and yet it still rankles him enough that the atmosphere becomes tinged with a certain… frost.

Most of the time, he thought it was Tsunade that really had no problem hurting him. But times like this come as an unpleasant reminder that she simply isn’t as subtle about it as they are. She’s straightforward. She doesn’t test him. Whereas when it comes to Orochimaru, the needles come so subtly in the dead of night, in the form of some question or comment, and without even the moonlight to afford him that warning flash. He’s had it before, where a casual conversation somehow ends with him feeling like he’s fucked up—so it sets in rather quickly that there’s nothing cute or fun about this line of questioning whatsoever, for all he gives a hum of amusement into the next swig of sake, before setting his glass bluntly down again.

“Are you forgetting how not ordinary we are? Surely not, my dear friend,” the sage says coolly, in that irritatingly old-and-wise tone of his—the one reserved for moments of profound wisdom and bullshitting such as these. “What’s poison, after all, to the finest medic the world has ever seen? Or to a disciple of Ryūchidō whose blood is said to match that of the most deadly viper itself?”

That was one of the more wild rumours that had surrounded Orochimaru, for sure, but Jiraiya is ever one for playing up the mystery. He knows damn well they’re a B type—just like him, just like Tsunade. Sometimes he wonders whether that was a purposeful choice on Sensei’s part… or a grave oversight. Putting that matter aside in his mind, Jiraiya taps his chin thoughtfully, trying to maintain the illusion that this is a well-meaning expression of Orochimaru’s characteristic curiosity rather than a test of… well, he’s not sure what, because he refuses to ease up on the illusion, you see.

“Well, Tsunade’s more likely to save herself from a mortal wound,” he continues, inclining his head towards her, “and you’re more likely to evade an attack in the first place…” Having nodded towards Orochimaru, he stares somewhere above and between them for a moment. “As for me? Well I’m as tough as a cockroach, not to mention quite wily, aren’t I? But I’m only one guy. Can’t I say I’d send my body to one, and my protective shield of hair to the other? I’ve got about a hundred tricks that means I don’t hafta choose…”

It’s a cop-out, and he knows it. Plus, that illusion… it really isn’t holding up that well. He just knows that saying the wrong thing will get him in trouble, or perhaps even come across as some grave betrayal… and that includes refusing to give a conclusive answer.

One or the other, Jiraiya. Think about it, think about it—would saying I’d just off myself for the two of them be acceptable? No no, probably not…

“Urgh, fine. In a situation where there was absolutely no option, no wiles or nothin’ that would help, just straight up choosing… I guess I’d simply have to go for the least annoying one.” He shrugs matter-of-factly, then spares a sneering side-eye and irritating lean towards their dearest medic, who is fast nearing drunken belligerence. “Sorry Tsuna!~”

His subsequent jolly guffawing is cut short with an ‘agh, ouch!’ as he is rather predictably socked in the arm for such a comment, not that Tsunade really seems to care. Mind games like this aren’t exactly her thing, and certainly not while drunk. In fact, in her drunkenness she slurs something or another about ‘not needin’ t’be saved by no-one, much less you, idjit’… which in part, may have impacted his choice to go that way at all.

Because really, how does one answer such a question in all seriousness? And what would they say, more pertinently, if asked the same ruthlessly unfair question? They’d never know, because neither of them ever would.

And Orochimaru should see it, how unfair it really is, in the way Jiraiya turns his teasing gaze from Tsunade to them—and how in that most minute of movements it takes to refocus his attention onto them, his overall demeanour shifts from merry to overcast, no matter how his lips try to hang on to that signature cheeky curl. There isn’t a particular message he’s trying to convey in that look, no specific reprimand or indication of exactly how serious his answer had been… just a certain wounded discomfort, marred with something else. Something that he himself can’t place, not even with the benefit of inhabiting his own thoughts.

What he does know, however, is that there’s certainly more truth in it than his skilfully casual approach to the answer, in the end, had let on… something that may not be as simple as a measure of love, which they were deviously trying to weed out of him, but of his fiery protectiveness for them in particular, which was admittedly a shade stronger than what he felt towards Tsunade. And maybe that is, in and of itself, reflective of his love for them… or, perhaps, what he feels he is to them. What value he has to them, in comparison to her. It’s far too much to figure out on such a pleasant night, the first in months, with the alcohol flowing and emotions hastily smothered beneath tall tales.

Whatever it is though, he just hopes that they recognise it somehow, lurking in his soft, subdued eyes, and that they’re satisfied.

#dokuhebi #welp #this one got my energy today haha #how dare they - how very dare they #submission #{fragments | dokuhebi | at war}#{verse:at war | dokuhebi}

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jacksgreysays · 4 years

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Truth does not do as much good in the world as the appearance of truth does evil. -Daniil Dankovsky, from "Pathologic" + Friendship is a (Mutual) Con

Appearance Of Truth

The devil is known for pulling some pretty great tricks--but he had to have learned it from somewhere.

Sorry for the super late response, lionheadbookends. Consider it a little bit of Christmas in April, I guess?

I'll be honest, I was saving this in the hopes that I'd be able to write a proper ficlet around it, but the writer's block is real and also I was involved in a couple of shows earlier this year that got a little nuts. For obvious reasons, I do not currently have those same theater-related distractions.

This feels like an introducing-Danzou-as-the-season-big-bad episode. So whether that means it's the "season finale" of a "previous season" like, say, the previous season's big bad is being taken away by Interpol and Yamato/Tenzo's name has been cleared (but he decides to stay with the crew, obviously) but as they're being guided away they're mutter to Kakashi something like:

"You were too focused on me. You have no idea what's coming your way"

And then, like, the second to last scene is the crew hearing that the big bad died "from a heart attack" on the way to Interpol's holding cells. But they've already split up for the season hiatus so they're a little concerned but not too much so? Especially since for the most part that big bad had put them through hell and it's like "well, karmic justice."

Anyway, the last scene would be a real brief Danzo speaking on the phone and being all backlit and evil looking and a pan out to reveal that he's *LE GASP* a high ranking government official or a justice of the peace or something like that.

Either that or it's the first episode where Danzo has "actual lines" and he's doing insidious shenanigans such as assigning Team Gai to the crew's case or promoting Shikako's family (who have previously been established as working for the government) such that they're more within his influence, etc. etc.

I kind of feel like, as a weird Chekhov's gun or a tension building thing, Danzo would have health problems and Itachi (who has been previously established as not a criminal but not as unaware as Sasuke hopes) is possibly a doctor and it's like... at some point Danzo threatens Sasuke with like "I have your brother hostage" when in fact Itachi is like "lol, old man, i've been speeding up your rate of death. Nobody threatens my little brother [but me?]" because Itachi is a psychopath for all that he is supposed to be a pacifist. *SHRUGS*

Which is not to dismiss Sakura's role on the team--because, the crew loves their resident doctor and she loves them--but in this world where, hey, murder is not the norm, I don't think it would fit within Sakura's character arc to poison Danzo. I mean, it's one thing for her to lie, cheat, and steal. But murder is like O_O a step too far.

Then again, Tsunade might even in this world where murder is not the norm. And it would be less out of a psychopathic "nobody threatens my brother" thing and like a "for the greater good, and also my student shouldn't have to make these terrible decisions." But I think I would have to establish Tsunade's role in this world and I have no idea at this moment in time what that would be because I had her as the leader of Doctor's Without Borders.

Unless... since the start of the "series" Tsunade has become president?

Uhhhhh... I think I have to think this through some more...

#jacksgreyson #lionheadbookends #ask box advent calendar #asks #prompt response #brainstorm #fake fic summaries #fanfcition #friendship is a (mutual) con #dreaming of sunshine #naruto #Danzo Shimura #itachi uchiha #sakura haruno #tsunade senju #appearance of truth

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365daysofsasuhina · 5 years

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[ @sasuhinamonth || SasuHina Month 2019 || Day Fourteen: Summons ] [ Uchiha Sasuke, Hyūga Hinata ] [ SasuHina ] [ Verse: A Light Amongst Shadows ] [ AO3 Link ]

She’s been contemplating it for a little while now.

Akamaru, technically, isn’t a summon. Kiba doesn’t have a contract for the canine, but that’s because they’re literally always together. She can’t think of a time she’s seen the Inuzuka without seeing him with his ninken.

Shino, too, has his kikaichu. But given that they literally live within his body, that...doesn’t really count either. So back then, the notion hadn’t really hit her yet.

Naruto, she later learned, got his when he was a genin training with Jiraiya. And Sakura, too, was introduced to Katsuyu when she was under Tsunade’s wing during Naruto’s absence. Even their teacher, Kakashi, has a summoning contract with several ninken, which Hinata got to work with when they went on the retrieval mission in an attempt to find Uchiha Itachi, and lure in his brother Sasuke.

But it only really came to her - the idea of getting summons of her own - quite recently. Sasuke - someone she’s been unexpectedly befriending after the end of the fourth shinobi world war - actually has two summoning contracts. One he forged while under Orochimaru with the serpents, and another with hawks. While he doesn’t use the former much anymore, the latter get quite a bit of use. Whether it be small errand for the more typically-sized birds, or even traveling on the backs of those far larger.

It had made Hinata wonder at the convenience. True, she doesn’t really do standard missions anymore, given her new role in Sasuke’s dream project: the revived police force of Konoha. With so few Uchiha left, and Sasuke the only one without employment, the Hyūga - what with their alliance with their cousin clan - have taken to filling in the gaps.

Hinata was actually the first to join, given her growing friendship with Sasuke after his return. Itachi being in ANBU and Shisui being a Hokage bodyguard meant he was the only one left to start the project...and of course, she leant her support.

So, between being third and fourth wheels behind Naruto and Sakura...allies through their clans...and now partners in the police, the pair see quite a bit of each other.

And that includes his summons.

“Sasuke-kun, may I...ask you something?”

“Sure,” he replies, sending a messenger hawk back into the skies.

“How, um...how do you get a summoning contract…?”

That earns a curious glance. “...you want one?”

“I’ve been...thinking about it. They just seem so...useful!” she quips, folding hands behind her back as they idle. “...I really have no idea w-what I’d get, though. It just seems...nice to have them to rely on, ne?”

“They can be handy if they suit you well,” Sasuke agrees. “I got the contract with the snakes mostly due to necessity. Orochimaru insisted on it. And they served their purposes when I needed them.” For a moment he seems to remember something, grimacing a bit. “...but anymore I try to use my hawks more. I want to...distance myself from that.”

“I can understand…” She turns the toe of her sandal against the ground. “...so, how do you, um...get one?”

“Well...Orochimaru had the scroll for the serpents. I went looking for a new contract after I left, and found a small dojo that trained with reference to raptors. I spent a little time there, and managed to convince them to let me sign a contract. At first it was just Garuda, my largest hawk. But he has since expanded the contract for me to include a few underlings of his. Like Naruto’s contract covers many toads from Myōbokuzan. Most start with singular summons, which also depends on the size...and go from there. Like Kakashi and his pack of ninken.”

“So...are contracts usually a bit...exclusive?”

“Some are. It depends, really. More basic ones you can find in the library in Konoha. But for something more...specialized, you usually have to look elsewhere. They’re typically kept secret and limited. What were you thinking?”

“I really have no idea...I guess something for communication would be nice, but...also maybe for battle? We don’t have much heavy combat to do now, but...if we ever do, more muscle would be, um...nice.”

“...we’ll go check out the library after our shift. See if we can find you something.”

That gets Hinata to brighten. “...okay!”

Later that afternoon, the pair make their way to the proper building and section. “Go ahead and give it a look.”

Perusing the labels, Hinata finds - as Sasuke hinted - more...basic contracts. Birds, cats, dogs...nothing really what she’d been hoping for.

...but then something catches her eye.

It looks like it hasn’t been touched in ages, raising a plume of dust as she pulls it from the corner of the shelf. The name rings a familiar bell. “...this one!”

“You sure?”

“Mhm!”

“...all right. Let’s go try it.”

Having checked out the scroll, they move to the training grounds, and Hinata undoes the seal. Very few names and fingerprints line the interior, and Hinata feels a strange airiness in her chest. “...okay…” Nicking her thumb with a kunai, she carefully writes out her name, and then presses all five fingers to the paper. Then, following the hand sigils on the scroll, she uses the same hand, welling chakra through her hand and declaring, “Kuchiyose no jutsu!”

Vapor plumes where her hand touches the ground, and for a moment she can’t see her surroundings. But then a breeze helps clear it aside.

There, sitting primly in the open training field, is a cream-colored lioness. After a pause, looking Hinata over thoughtfully, she begins lapping at a paw and bathing her face nonchalantly.

“Um...h-hello!” Hinata takes a step forward, not...sure what to do. “I am...Hyūga Hinata! I would...like to form a contract with you!”

A few moments pass of more bathing before the feline looks to her airily. “...I am Sumasu. It has been many years since a human called upon us. To what end would our contract serve…?”

“I, well…” She didn’t know she was going to be interviewed. “I work within my village to maintain the laws, and...keep people safe. I was looking for a summon to work by my side, and help me. Um...I thought you would be a good fit! Lions are strong, agile, and noble creatures. And...I have this.” With a flare of chakra, she summons Jūho Sōshiken, letting the twin lions swell over her hands.

To her surprise, interest alights the summon’s amber eyes. “...most impressive. Your cause is noble, and your strength evident. I suppose...I could forge a contract under such conditions. Consider your request granted, Hyūga Hinata. I will answer when you call.” With a decline of her head...the lioness vanishes in another puff of vapor.

Hinata and Sasuke both just...stare for a moment.

“...well, there you go.”

That earns a short snort from the Hyūga. “Not...how I pictured that going, but...that works!” Now to just see someone running in terror as Sumasu chases them down...it’ll be glorious.

.oOo.

This was actually cute and fun to write xD I love the idea of Hinata getting herself a summon, especially a lion-themed one, given the theme of her signature jutsu! Sumasu (澄ます) translates to prim, which was the nature I wanted the lioness to have. A bit literal, but...then again, all the toads have the word toad in the their name, so...I don't think it's too out there xD Anyway, that's all for today's entry! Maybe Hinata will get to summon Sumasu in another entry, we'll see x3 Thanks for reading!

#sasuhina #sasuhinamonth #sasuhinamonth2019 #uchiha sasuke #hyūga hinata #a light amongst shadows [ canon verse ]

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kakashisavakening · 5 years

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Chapter 4 - The First Ray of Sun through the Clouds

Quick disclaimer about the story line - this really doesn't fit on the Naruto Story line. It is kind of around the time when the Shippuden starts, but not entirely. I wanted to make Sakura of legal age, cus ya know.... I wanna include some adult content and we don't want Kakashi to bang a minor. So she is about 18 here, but the story is still back between the skipped years before the shippuden. (with all those filler episodes I would say they should have aged anyway before the series continued but that is just my opinion)

I wanted this series to be definitely pre-war and be in the time when Naruto was begging the Fifth to go on missions to find Sasuke, and Sakura still being trained by Tsunade. So please consider this as an alternative universe.

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Kakashi was taken aback by Sakura's sudden - and unexpected - confession. In her heart, he felt confusion and distress, but he also felt that her words carried the truth.

He, too, felt conflicted. He knew that this was wrong somehow. He knew that they weren't supposed to talk about this or act on this... this... felling? Desire? What was it? What was it really? Was it something primitive, like lust? Was it more complex? Was it love?

Did he know what love was? Did she?

"Please forgive me, sensei. I thought you should know.. in case.." - She suddenly grew quiet and looked out the window. The sky seemed to be a bit less grey than before... even some hints of blue peaked through the clouds.

"In case of what?" - Kakashi asked back. Sakura closed her eyes and smiled at him.

"It's nothing. Doesn't matter." - Sakura didn't know how telling him that they were both dying right now would help their case. She knew he felt her lies, but since she couldn't hear his thoughts, she assumed he couldn't hear hers either.

Kakashi let out a half annoyed sigh. - "Why are you lying to me?"

For a second she remained quiet. What could she say to that? To protect him? That sounded cliché... and would also be a lie. She decided not to tell him to give them a chance. If they were to die here - because nothing pointed in the direction of the possibility that he would regain his memories or will to live - they might as well enjoy the time they have left. But how could she tell him that? It was a very selfish decision to keep it from Kakashi, but at the same time she thought if he never returns to what he used to be, then burdening him with the responsibility of her death as well would be cruel. There were lots of other ways to make him remember...

"It's all good, Kakashi-sensei." - She stepped to the window and opened it to let in the breeze. It still carried the scent of the rain with a hint of sweet cherry blossoms.

Kakashi wanted to hug her from behind and bury his face in her shoulder. He knew she would let him - after all, she had just confessed that she also had feelings for him... but he stopped himself. This wasn't real. She might be not real. Her lips felt real, her body too... it all felt like she was there with him, but how could she really be here. He closed his eyes and let his mind wander, alternate between desire and self-restriction. An image floated into his vision. Of her... carrying a huge stack of books. A memory. His eyes popped open in surprise. This wasn't something he had seen before. He closed his eyes again and concentrated on the image. She looked different... younger. There she wasn't woman like at all... just a kid.

The Sakura standing before him was very different from that child... not just because her body had matured but her eyes were less filled with that sparkle. The sparkle of childhood and naive beliefs. This Sakura carried the scars of a ninja in her soul. He joined her by the window, leaning on the frame without touching her.

"How old am I?" - he asked - "Out there.."

To be frank, Sakura didn't know. He never told them anything about his personal life. - "I'm really unsure... around 30-ish."

"Please don't tell me I turn into a pedo..." - He sighed and massaged his temples. Sakura flushed and shook her head violently.

"No! You never did anything to me... never really paid much attention to me, to be fair. Did't even train me as much as you did the other members of team 7." - She sighed - "Of course I have always admired you as a teacher and you never failed to protect me, but it was never a romantic relationship. Or any kind of relationship, really. Just a sensei and his student."

"Then why is this shit happening?" - Kakashi waved at the cherry blossoms in the city.

"I am not sure. But you never tried to approach me that way before." - She said, her cheeks still flushed. Kakashi couldn't help, but stare.

"What about you? Were you having feelings for me before coming here?" - Kakashi asked. His bluntness made her uneasy. You can't just tell a person you love them out of the blue... Obviously she wasn't neutral to him. She had risked her life to come here after all.

"Since the Fifth took over the office, she had sent the Jonin out on missions nonstop. We haven't really been on a mission since I was 13. That was a while ago, really. I was't around you enough to know.. to realise." -She began playing with her fingers, occasionally pressing a nail into her fingertips in attempt to ease her discomfort. Here, Kakashi was barely a year older than her. Seeing him like this might have had some influence on her feelings coming to the surface. Here, she was allowed. Not just because here they were around the same age - she didn't mind him being older, really - but because this world was theirs. Nobody was here to judge or blame them for feeling anything.

"Walk with me?" - Kakashi asked suddenly and jumped on the windowsill, reaching one hand out for her. She took it without hesitation and they jumped to the ground gracefully. The wind blew swarms of cherry blossom petals around them. She smiled at the sight of a couple rays of sunshine peaking through the clouds. Maybe it was a sign? Was he getting better? But now she wasn't sure she wants to leave this place anymore. If they go back, what would happen? Would they pretend that nothing had happened?

"Where are we going?" - Sakura asked curiously.

"Just having a stroll, don't worry." - He smiled. She had told him that he was at least a decade older than her in reality. It was so confusing to think of himself as a 30-something man. He took a deep breath. He was still barely just 19 here. His real self must have so much experience in these kinds of things. - "Sakura, do I have a partner out there?"

"I haven't seen you with a romantic partner if that's what you are asking. You never really told us anything about yourself... heck, I haven't seen your face until now!" - She almost growled the last bit. It had really annoyed the whole team that Kakashi let himself be this blank canvas for people to imagine and pin things on. He never corrected anybody, but never really confirmed anything either. Kakashi chuckled at her latter comment.

"I have never been one to show my face much, that's true." - He smiled. - "But how was I supposed to kiss you if I left my mask on?"

Sakura's heart jumped at the mention of their previous kiss. - "What will happen to us?" - She had blurted out, not really thinking about the consequences this conversation might carry.

"You mean if we go back?" - Kakashi raised an eyebrow. Sakura nodded. He looked at the sky and put his hands in his pocket. - "Dunno. I mean, it was just one kiss, what do you expect me to do?"

That's right.. She thought. In the world of the adults, a kiss was next to meaningless. Sometimes even a night spent together meant nothing in the next morning. But this kiss was not something she could just forget and move on easily from. And she wanted more. Every time their eyes met, she felt this unexplainable force, pushing her to take a step towards him. She wanted to take that stupid mask off - and maybe some other clothing items too - and kiss him again. Filled with these thoughts, he didn't answer his question.

But there was one thing she also forgot besides his question. He could feel what she felt. He felt her lust wash over him, and he needed to swallow and take a deep breath not to be taken over by it. It might have been hers and not his, but it affected him just as much. He closed his eyes and tried to think of sad things to make his desire fade away... but no matter how much he tried, all he saw was her face, even with his eyes closed. He knew that if this went on like that he won't be able to contain himself. - "Do you want me?" - He asked. That was somewhere a pointless question, since he felt clearly that she did. But desire and will were two entirely separate things. She might want to contain herself just as much as he does - probably for different reasons. But as much as he wanted to remain collected and calm, this primal feeling wouldn't settle, driving his thoughts to scenarios that would make anyone blush from head to toe.

Their eyes locked for a long moment before Sakura finally answered. She needed that time to really grasp what he meant. He didn't mean to ask wether she wanted him in his life... he meant here and now. Finally she too a deep breath and only said - "Not here."

Kakashi felt a sense of victory in his chest. As if he had just won the most precious prize in the world. He interlocked their fingers and pulled her close. She reached up with one hand and freed his face from the mask. He immediately kissed her. Much more passionately than before. Their kiss before was - despite being full of emotions - very careful. They tiptoed around eggshells, making sure the other really wasn't against anything they did. This was different. Their breath was heavy with lust when they finally broke apart. Kakashi pulled her towards a building she finally recognised to be her house. She pulled him back for a second. He shot her a questioning look.

"How do you know I live here?" - She asked, pushing her feelings aside as much as she could.

"I don't. I just assumed this house has a bed, and since this village is empty, nobody will mind..." - For a moment there she thought he might be remembering, but that was a false hope. She took a deep breath, not really feeling the moment anymore. Kakashi felt her resistance and stopped. - "We don't need to do this. I don't want you to do things you don't feel like doing." - He said, letting go of her hand. She smiled.

"Would you just come and lay down with me?" - She asked. Seeing her house reminded her of the family she had left behind. Her friends. Now, all she needed was a tight hug. Kakashi nodded, bit disappointed, but completely understanding. Sakura guided him up to her room, and went to the bathroom to change into something more comfortable. She put on an oversized t-shirt and pyjama shorts, then went back to find Kakashi already under the covers. His clothes neatly folded on the chair. He lifted the covers for her to climb in. She felt a bit relieved and disappointed to find out that he still had his boxers on. He had warmed up the bed to a comfy temperature already and she felt strangely comfortable in his embrace. He kissed her forehead and tightened his arms around her a bit. He plopped his head back on the pillow and closed his eyes.

"Thank you Kakashi." - she whispered into his chest. She couldn't see, but a smile sneaked to the corners of his mouth. A long time has passed since he felt loved. A long time has passed since he felt anything besides sadness, emptiness and bereavement. The soft material of her t-shirt was thin enough for him to feel her heartbeat against his chest. He was surprised when he realised that they had perfectly synchronised heartbeats. He opened his sharingan eye and looked at her. All he saw was a thin red thread tying her right pinky to his left. He had never seen such a thread before. He took a deep breath and decided to ask her about it later.

Rich orange light illuminated the room as the sun went down. Sakura's breath became even and her lips parted a little as she fell asleep in his arms. She looked like a porcelain doll with her fair skin and her perfectly shaped cherry lips. He brushed a strand of pink hair out of her face. Even her eyelashes were this light shade of pink. The sunset slowly turned into a cool shade of blue as the sun dipped under the horizon and the night spread across the sky. Finally, he fell asleep too, listening to her breathing.

#kakashi hatake #kakasaku #sakura #sakuraharuno #sakura haruno #sakura hatake #fanfiction #fanfic #naruto fanfic

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une-nuit-pour-se-souvenir · 6 years

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If sakura was pokmon trainer,what team would she have?

You’re asking me this, but the truth is, I only know the first 150 (well, somewhat 250). However, from generation I and II:

> Igglybuff as a starter polémon, which Sakura would select and the sarutobi’s lab because of the childish reason that it’s cute. That choice would suit Sakura as her mindset was at 12 year old, very naive and sheltered, and liking appearanes. Narratively, it would suit her as a character as well. As for “part I”, Igglybuff (and it’s first evolution, Jigglypuff), is a “normal” pokémon, whose type and moveset isn’t anything special. Sakura begins as a “normal” child that doesn’t come from a clan, she has a standard skillset and doesn’t have “special abilities”. As for “part II”, Jigglypuff evolves into Wigglytuff, which is a very strong and useful pokémon (stats, type, moves) that through TMs (which could reflect the “research” and “studious” part of Sakura) can “complete” the rest of the pokémon team she has. For example, types that are missing are “fighting and “electric”, and I think it would be interesting if it was Rock Lee / Tsunade who’d helped her teaching it fighting moves while it was Sasuke who’d help her teaching it the electric moves.

> As a specialist in venoms, I believe Sakura would opt for one of these (more specialised, there’s poison type below), either Bulbasaur or Oddish (Vileplume) lines. I was very torn between which one of them, but in the end I realised Bulbasaur is “amphibian like” (so he’d suit Naruto more) and it’s also rarer (it could be a gift from Jiraiya to Naruto), so I ended up chosing Oddish (Vileplume). I also think it would be funny for young Sakura to get an Oddish because they’re cute (and common), but then it would evolve into the “ugly” Gloom and she would be dismayed. However, she’d love it anyway despite it’s “darkness” (hint hint) because it’s her beloved pokémon.I envision Sasuke giving her a Leaf Stone at some anniversary (very symbolic, but also very pratical as a trainer -instead of a ninja-, very Sasuke-ish I think) and later when he’d be gone to frolic with “Team Akatsuki”, she’d find out in a research book that she could use it on her pokémon for it to become stronger.

> For dramatic irony, a Magicarp (and also because it’s a water pokémon, which I believe is Sakura’s element, not earth). At first it is “useless” and needs a lot of help to grow, but working hard on it rewards the trainer with one of the most powerful pokemons in those two generations. I envision something like James’ magikarp in the show (maybe offered by a clueless Naruto or Rock Lee as a wooing gift), he got it and had to haul it around (always a big joke), but then one day by a freak incident it would evolve and… well, I don’t think I need to harp on the badass and usefulness of Gyarados as everyone knows it (as for great stats / moves, it’s water types it can learn several rare type moves, such as ice or dragon as well). Also, it should be a SHINY MAGIKARP, so it’s evolution is red! ETA: While I looked for a chart of it, I was made aware there’s actually ANOTHER evolution beyond that. but I don’t know what it does.

> Caterpie is also an interesting choice for dramatic irony, and it’s also a nice “substitute” for a slug (most insect pokémon don’t really fit this). It’s less of a pain in the arse to level up, but later on it is a glass canon (so not very Sakura-ish, which is why I haven’t chosen it since I don’t think it suits her) as it has poor stats comparatively to the others and is weak against plenty of types. However and for me, it’s a very good one especially well beefed up as it’s so useful and versatile it’s amazing (it’s one of my favourites!). This would be given to Sakura by Tsunade at the beginning of her training. An interesting story would be Sakura working hard at the Pokémon Hospital during the timeskip, so every money saved would go to buying stat enhancing treats for it (what I… do… everytime I get a Butterfree, which is about always) and for TMS in general (as I said before, this could reflect Sakura’s intelligence part, she’d research and study the best ways to help her pokémon become stronger).

> A Nidoran♀, for the same reasons as Jigglypuff.It starts off as a very normal pokémon, very fitting of how Sakura started, and it’s definetlyfeminine ♀♀♀,just like Sakura used to be (is and will be, to be fair; but I think you get the idea of what I’m trying to say). Then evolves into a very physically strong pokémon with poison and ground abilities (it can also learn most fighting moves), and as a bonus because of it’s earth type, this polémon is immune to electricity (completing the sannin parallel). I envision something like Sakura getting one while Sasuke is gone and he’d get a Nidoran♂ (without knowing), and then everytime they’d meet as enemies, the two pokemons wouldn’t be able to fight because they loved each other and interrupted to do embarassing things much to the chagrin of the two trainers.

> Happiny, another normal / fairy type I know, but again it can be used to complete the rest of the team just as Wigglytuff. In this case. I chose it because this chain is associated with medics. It came to mind as one of the first, but it would be one of the last she got, given to her by Tsunade either during the timeskip or after some special achievement (for example, getting all badges or something) in “part II”. Chansey / Blissey can learn psychic moves (as is the case for Jigglypuff / Wigglytuff, but that one already has a lot on it’s mind 😂 I’m sorry), which would fill Sakura’s “good with genjutsu” quota (which NARUTO didn’t do for some stupid reason), through normal training or learnt moves.

> A Togepi, yet another fairy type (but I kind of think this would be Sakura’s type if she was in the world of pokémon). I summed this team and saw that from what I’d associate with Sakura (or a “standard” ninja) “flying” was missing (Gyarados is flying but…), so she needed one to balance. It was either one of these or a normal bird (I love Pidgey / Pidgeotto / Pidgeot!), but I think Togepi being a fairy type and also can learn psychic moves would suit Sakura rather well. Not sure where this one would come from TBH.

ETA: THERE’S SEVEN OF THEM FORGIVE ME.

ETA2: Mew would be her mythical pokémon, obviously. It’s just too special to add to a “normal” team though.

#sakura haruno #pokémon

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siuilaruinofthegale · 3 years

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SIRIUS!!!!!!!! this is from the newest chapter of Melodies >:))))) (for the DVD commentary)

Despite his training, Tenzo almost laughs at the way the crowd parts for this new invader — but he doesn’t. Instead, he prepares himself, ready to spring if they’re a threat. It feels like forever before he sees the person shoving their way through the crowd: a very, very… top-heavy… blonde woman, trailed by a lithe woman with dark hair. “There you are, you old fuck,” she grumbles. Tenzo relaxes a little. Though he’s never seen the woman in person before, there’s only one person this could be.

“Tsunade-chan,” the Hokage greets her warmly, opening his arms for a hug. “It’s been years! How are you, my dear?”

She glances at his open arms and rolls her eyes. Instead of hugging him, she crosses her arms… and Tenzo has to look away for a second to collect himself. “Cut the shit, old man. You know perfectly well why I’m here. The fuck is this I hear about you demoting my apprentice? Talk fast, or else I’m going to demote you, sensei.”

Sarutobi-sama sighs. “No hugs? Not even a little one?” he asks, still holding his arms out. The frown on Tsunade’s face only grows deeper. “Ah, very well…” He drops his arms, and suddenly he seems taller, more imposing, more the Hokage and less the man. “Your apprentice burst into a Council meeting she was not qualified to be in, and showed flagrant disrespect to both the Elders and me in doubting our actions by informing us, at the top of her lungs, that she considered it a grave folly to induct Uchiha Itachi into ANBU at such a young age.”

Silence. “…and?” Tsunade says after a minute, raising one eyebrow. “What else did she do? Spit on you? Pee on Koharu’s flowers? Moon Homura?” The Hokage blinks at her and shakes his head slowly. “No? Did she break anyone’s bones? Throw someone out the window?”

He huffs, a bit of anger in the sound. “Tsunade, you know full well I cannot allow people to do such things. Perhaps, had she voiced her concerns in a calmer manner, I would not have demoted her at all, but she —“

“She gave a damn!” Tsunade snaps, her nostrils flaring in anger. “See, here’s the thing you never learned about Sakura. I got to live with this shit the entire time I trained her: she’s soft at heart. Every time something vaguely tragic happened, she wanted us to drag ourselves over and help. She treated each and every kid she helped like she was their sensei, because she wanted them to feel special. She wanted them to feel loved. She —”

“Be that as it may, that’s still no excuse for such rude, inappropriate behavior!” the Hokage snaps right back.

“Was it inappropriate, or was it just inconvenient?” she snarls, lips drawing back from her teeth a little. “You think I don’t know why ANBU stays in the shadows? How dumb do you think I am? You throw shinobi into ANBU, and you sharpen them and sharpen them until they’re on the edge of breaking. A sword might have a sharp edge, but that edge is fragile, and if they’re in the shadows, nobody notices it when they break.” He stares at Tsunade, mouth set tight. “Other villages do it, too. Most missing nin are either genin who wanted to make a name for themselves… or they’re ANBU who finally hit their breaking point. You didn’t demote Sakura because she disrespected you. You demoted her because she pointed out, at the top of her lungs, that you’ve broken almost as many people as you’ve saved.”

I actually really enjoyed writing this scene, and I almost went way more over the top with it, but they ARE in public. Anyway, from the top down! (read moreing because I cannot be silent)

I danced around whose point of view to tell this from, and I eventually decided on Tenzo because Tenzo's relatively neutral, all things considered. As far as I know, he's never seen Tsunade in real life before this point, and I wanted that 'first impression' glimpse. He's also seen the real dark side of ANBU as a child, so he is more than a little invested in Sakura's fervent defense of Itachi, but he's also able to set aside emotions and view things rationally in a way that some others aren't always able to do.

I toyed with having the Sandaime's initial greeting be a little harsher, a little more commensurate with the way she's already located him in the room very rudely, but we all know the Sandaime is a master of rug sweeping. If Tsunade came over and didn't mention Sakura, he would never mention it himself -- which is why he greets her like it's a family reunion, not someone showing up to call him out.

I also wasn't too sure about Tenzo's reaction here, because he is a consummate professional, but I figured he's sat in on enough of the Sandaime's meetings that he's intimately familiar with all Sarutobi's stalling games, all the ways he ameliorates anger, and for all that he's certainly never seen someone roll their eyes at him.

The "I'm going to demote you, sensei" line made me laugh. A lot. Although I haven't shown Sakura's letters to Tsunade yet, Sakura's very good at understating things. Tsunade knows that, so she assumes it's worse than Sakura's relating, but she doesn't realize exactly how much Sakura's understating them. If she did, the Sandaime would've already been demoted. (with a fist, to be clear)

Friendly-Sarutobi and Hokage-Sarutobi being different facets of the same person was something I really wanted to fit in. Just 'cause.

This part, where Tsunade asks "What else?" was almost way bigger, too. Part of why I had Sarutobi come down on Sakura so severely was because she's civilian-born. Whether or not she's the Senju heir and Tsunade's apprentice, when she storms into the meeting with both guns blazing, she doesn't have anything super showy to back up her claims. She constantly claims she's the best med-nin in the world, but her proof of that is... mostly things only other med-nin would understand. A singer isn't going to understand why a pianist might struggle with certain things, so normal shinobi aren't going to understand much of what med-nin do. At this point, the only things she has that are very special are things that she's learned from Tsunade -- which means she might as well be Jane Doe coming in off the street and yelling at the Queen. He wouldn't have disciplined an Uchiha, heir or not, this harshly. Or a Hyuuga, or a Yamanaka, or any of the clan kids.

This "what else" bit, and what follows, is Tsunade basically looking at him and going "the fuck are you mad about old man? this isn't SHIT. she didn't spit in your face, she didn't kill anyone, she literally just showed up and yelled. this is bullshit and YOU KNOW IT."

What his defense amounts to is, "well, if I let one of them get away with it they'll all try!" along with a side of "stop being so hysterical", as a treat, since Sakura's a girl and girls are always hysterical. (I hope the complete and utter derision I focused into that word is audible.)

Melodies!Sakura's considerably harder-looking around the edges than canon!Sakura, mostly because she was born into war, but I wanted it to remain clear that she is, at the core, still Sakura. She wants to help, to make the world better, but when it comes down to it, she's willing to do whatever she has to do to keep her precious people safe. She helps every kid she runs into because she sees herself in them, because she sees echoes of Kakashi and Koga and Dana, and she doesn't want them to go into life alone -- she's all heart, despite the sharp edges.

The last bit, about ANBU, is one I dithered over a surprising amount. As far as I know, canonically, we're never given any statistics about missing nin. What we do see is that ANBU are constantly pushed to their limits, and then they're pushed even farther. Kakashi and Itachi are the most notable examples, I think, but... I think the case could be made for every single person we see in ANBU in the entire shebang. Fandom characterizes Genma as a flirt and a ladies' man, or a mans' man, or a take-all-comers person. Hypersexuality is, not always, but often a reaction to PTSD. As far as I remember, it's most commonly a reaction to specifically sexual trauma, but it's also not unheard of for returning soldiers with PTSD to end up leaning into hypersexuality. It's simply not part of human nature to be able to repeatedly imbibe (and in this case, inflict) trauma and death on others without it negatively effecting your psyche. There are always exceptions, of course, but exceptions aren't the rule.

All of that led into the last line, which took me a lot of staring into the distance and frantic re-writing to get just right. As someone who has C-PTSD herself, I tend to shy away from referring to people with PTSD as 'broken'. It's not very positive. For this, though, I couldn't think of any other word to use. Tsunade's not just talking about grown humans here. She's talking about people who, for the largest part, have been child soldiers. They've been raised on a diet of death and destruction, and without help... eventually, that's what comes back out.

In meta, we the fans know that the massacre is because Itachi was ordered to do so. We've seen it. What we haven't been shown is all the droves of people a system like this would inevitably churn out. Tsunade says it here because she's seen it. The canon deaths she's suffered through removed the veil from her eyes, however thin it was before. She's under no illusions any longer, and it's part of why my Tsunade doesn't go back to Konoha. She's seen the trail of broken ninja she'd have to step over to get back home -- and staying silent for so long means she's wielded the blade just as surely as the Sandaime has.

#siuil stuff #ask games #dvd commentary #siuil writes #I told you I am physically unable to be silenced

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raendown · 6 years

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@mouseymightymarvellous I hear your cries for more same age au and I deliver, with pleasure my dear.

Pairing: KakashiSakura Word count: 2744 Summary: Growing up together means changing together and Kakashi has always seen her from afar.

Follow the link or read it under the cut!

When We Were Young

She was soft and too pink and Kakashi hated her. How was he ever meant to become a great ninja and erase the stain of his father’s name if he couldn’t even be paired with decent teammates? He’d thought since Obito and Rin were both sick his temporary team might be better, might have stronger members that would help him grow instead of hold him back like usual. This was not what he had expected.

As if the rambunctious blonde who failed to catch him in a poorly concealed trap when he arrived wasn’t enough, the idiot pink-haired girl moping off to one side was a whole different story of terrible. Upon discovering that he would be standing in for “Sasuke-kun” today she had all but folded in half with disappointment and the already incorrect grip she had on her kunai had fallen out of place even more. Kakashi sniffed in her direction, thoroughly disappointed. These two were barely ninjas and would probably never make it past genin. Was the blond one really Sensei’s son?

For the entire day of training under the strangely emotionless Sai-sensei, all that Haruno Sakura did was compare him to her precious Sasuke-kun. She spoke of the boy constantly and told Kakashi how in love she was three times in just the first hour. By the end he was ready to stab both her and the poor idiot who obviously didn’t like her back.

And why should he? There was nothing to like; there was no substance to her. Sakura’s feet stood for Sasuke, her arms lifted for Sasuke, her heart beat for Sasuke. There was not a single part of her that fought for her own sake and Kakashi couldn’t stand the weakness of it. Didn��t she realize that love would break her? He would have pitied her if he could be bothered with the emotion but it was much easier to dismiss all three of these useless people from his mind.

When Kakashi left training he left his thoughts of Sakura behind him. He went back to Obito and Rin, still just as useless but at least a kind of useless he could work with. He went back to Minato-sensei, the strongest shinobi he had ever met who he just knew would cave and teach him the hiraishin one of these days. If he didn’t then Kakashi would just have to learn how to be faster by himself.

ii.

He was broken when she found him and even if he didn’t know it then this was only the first time that she would put him back together. She led him back to the fading light with whispers of hope, of Obito surviving, of a surgery gone well. Kakashi felt like she was pulling his head above the water and giving him air to breathe when for a minute he’d forgotten how.

Later it would shame him that he’d forgotten her so quickly in the moment, although she always insisted that she didn’t blame him. He was only twelve and the only friend he’d never even realized he had was alive, alive, alive. Obito was breathing despite odds. His arm would never be the same again and his leg had been amputated but his heart was beating steadily as Kakashi collapsed across his chest and wept like he hadn’t since his father had been alive.

Only after the storm had passed and he sat wiping at his face in embarrassment did a very tired Rin murmur quietly that it was all thanks to Sakura-chan.

“She did what I couldn’t,” his teammate told him with a hitch in her breath. “You both did. I was no help; I never am. But you brought him home and Sakura-chan brought him back to life and I just stood there like a stupid lump!”

“You’re not useless, Rin.” She looked at him like she’s never seen him before and Kakashi found that somehow more embarrassing than crying in front of her. “It was my fault the both of you were in danger in the first place. Obito was brave. And so were you. Both of you are always…really brave.”

Brave for facing the emotions that he’d never been able to face before. What he had always seen as a weakness they used as a strength and that was something he admired. Minato-sensei had been trying to teach him for years the truth about teamwork but it had taken him until now to get it. A team was not built on the back of whoever was strongest. No, a team was built on the strength of all of its members, every person bringing a skill to the table to cover the weaknesses of others and create an impenetrable unit.

He found the one he was looking for slumped over and sleeping on a bench. Sakura was only twelve years old, just the same as he was, but she had assisted with a seven hour surgery after being awoken in the middle of the night and she must have been very tired. Instead of disturbing her, Kakashi sniffed out the closest linen closet and brought her a blanket. It settled over her like the peace settling in his chest, a feeling he wasn’t familiar with. Fitting, he thought. The whole world around him looked unfamiliar now.

“Thank you.” He left his words as a whisper in her ear before disappearing down the hallway back to Obito’s room, not bothering to check over his shoulder to see bright green eyes fluttering awake.

iii.

Obviously he heard about Tsunade. The whole village had heard about Tsunade. She was sort of hard to miss as she came marching down the streets of Konoha bellowing, “Bring me your prodigy!” as though she hadn’t abandoned the village years ago.

Kakashi didn’t find out the context for this until late that night, huddled behind the academy with Rin and Obito, trading sips from a can of red bean tea. That was when Rin told him with only the shadow of jealously in her voice that the Lady Tsunade had returned to Konoha to chase the rumors of a medical prodigy.

She was here to apprentice Haruno Sakura.

Turning this information over in his mind slowly, Kakashi contemplated what he should say to that. She deserved it, in his opinion. If not for her Obito wouldn’t be sitting beside him wearing a prosthetic leg, tired from a long day of physical therapy. On the other hand, she wasn’t who his loyalty was owed to.

“Well you’ll just have to show her that there are two prodigies in the Leaf,” he said, carefully not looking over in Rin’s direction. “Lady Tsunade better be ready to have two apprentices.”

He dodged the hug and scowled at the hair ruffling. It was as easy as ever to turn Obito’s teasing comments in to light hearted bickering, the very foundation of their friendship which continued to this day no matter how much stronger their bonds had grown. Just because he was learning what it was to have friends didn’t mean he enjoyed being the center of attention any more than he used to. What mattered was that Rin was smiling again and looked more determined than ever and he hoped Sakura was prepared for a little competition.

iv.

She split the ground with her fist the first time he saw her in a battle and Kakashi felt his heart cracking along the fault lines, fluttering like a weak thing behind his ribs. It was hard to believe she was the same bubblegum girl he had hated on first sight and a part of him wondered if she still moved and breathed and fought for her Sasuke-kun. Joining ANBU had kept him from fighting with the regular forces – even Rin and Obito hadn’t been at his side in nearly a year now – so it was rather easy to see how he might have never seen Team 7 fight before.

It was also easy to see he’d been missing out.

Although it might have been an odd detail to latch on to, Kakashi couldn’t help but notice that she had cut her hair. The pink strands were sweat drenched and dirt stained; they clung to her face and neck in a manner that should not have been anywhere near as alluring as it was. He almost lost his footing, actually stopping to stare in awe, as he bent herself to the earth and tore it open with a roar that shook the spine inside him.

Stupidly, he mind couldn’t help repeating that old line he couldn’t remember the origin of: she’s beauty, she’s grace, she’ll punch you in the face.

Even more stupidly, for some reason he felt as though he wouldn’t mind if she punched him in the face. He shook the feeling off by turning and sliding his kunai through an enemy’s throat. It was pure coincidence that his targets had happened upon a group of fellow Konoha shinobi just before Kakashi caught up to them, darting out of the shadows and in to the fray with nary a word to those already fighting. Sakura and her companions had grown so much since that day he dismissed them all as useless.

After the dust had settled and the only people standing bore the symbol of the Leaf, Sakura turned to him with a smile streaked in blood and eyes so bright he almost shielded his own.

“Thank you for your assistance, ANBU-san,” she called. “You fight pretty good.”

He was forever thankful that his double masks neatly covered the blush rising on his cheeks as he slipped back in to the shadows without a word. The Uchiha, whom he presumed was the fabled Sasuke-kun, watched him go with a single eyebrow raised. He looked a lot like Itachi, although the same could be said of everyone in their clan.

Kakashi made sure to casually mention the encounter to Minato-sensei later when he made his report in the Hokage’s office. He watched his old teacher swell up with pride that his son’s team had made such a good impression on one of his best, asking eagerly what Kakashi thought of them. Before he could stop himself the words seemed almost to fall from his lips like a cart running out of control.

“I think she’s beautiful.”

Minato-sensei laughed until his belly must have hurt. Kakashi smacked his shoulder and left without being dismissed.

“Do you still live for someone else?”

Probably it was a weird question to ask someone when their hands were wrist deep inside your abdomen and their chakra was the only thing stopping you from bleeding out. Kakashi had never been too concerned with social norms, though.

Instead of answering Sakura gave him a desperate wild look as she screamed over her shoulder for someone to signal the Hokage. He knew what that meant. They wouldn’t be able to transport him back in time. Minato-sensei’s teleportation was their only hope of keeping him alive. Maybe that should have bothered him more but when Kakashi was twelve he had seen this girl perform a miracle and if ever there was someone who’s hands he trusted it was her.

“S-Sakura.” His voice was small and wet. How strange. “Sakura do you…still live for someone else?”

For some reason it felt important that she answer. It wasn’t as though her answer would matter, in this life or the next. There was no way for her to know that the shadows watched her sometimes as she laughed at the bar with her friends. There was no way for her to know that the flowers that sometimes showed up on her doorstep came from his hand. There was no way she knew how hard he had fallen for a girl who felt so strongly and yelled so loudly that it shook away the darkness in him until all he knew was the light she gave off so freely.

“Don’t speak, ANBU-san,” she admonished him. Her brow creased in concentration as she forced more chakra in to his belly. Kakashi barely paid attention to the arching of his spine or the way blood bubbled up between his lips.

“You…lived for him. You breathed and broke and fought for him.” Breathing was more difficult than it should have been. “You shouldn’t.” When she looked down at him he prayed she couldn’t see through the holes in his mask or the cracks in his soul. “You are…enough on your own. No one should own who you are.”

He didn’t get to see Minato-sensei arrive. Too soon his vision faded and Kakashi spared a thought for Rin and for Obito, hoping they wouldn’t take this too hard. Better friends he could never have asked for. He owed them so much but he was certain both of them knew what they meant to him. No ghosts came with him when he felt the world fade to black around him.

vi.

“You’re stupid,” were the first words he heard upon regaining consciousness.

“I hear that a lot,” he croaked, “though never in regards to my actual intelligence. What have I done now?”

Only after he spoke did he crack his eyes open, immediately closing them again. His hospital bed – and he was obviously in a hospital bed – was set directly underneath the harsh halogen lights. A quick jerking tug sent his bed skittering to one side with a terrible squealing noise, obviously not the sound of a bed on wheels, and that answered the unspoken question of who had just called him an idiot before he was fully conscious.

“Hello Haruno-san,” he murmured, opening his eyes again now that he was out of the light’s path.

“Don’t you Haruno-san me you stalker creep.”

Despite her words she sounded more amused that anything else. That was the only thing that gave Kakashi the courage to roll his eyes to the side and take her in, knowing that if he moved his head a headache would start up. She looked as good in her medic’s uniform as she always did. Her hair, recently trimmed, was held back with a few cute little pins. On her face she wore an expression he’d seen too often on Rin, a mixture of irritation, exasperation, and fondness. He was more surprised than usual to see the fondness.

“Uhm…”

“If you wanted to ask me out you would have been better served using words instead of waiting around outside the hospital every morning.”

“You…saw that?”

“No but Rin-chan and I chat. Girls do that, you see. She’s been an absolute gold mine of interesting tidbits while you were sleeping.”

“Note to self: murder Rin.”

“Don’t you dare! We made a bet and I’m going to win; I won’t let you make me lose, you hear!”

“A bet?” Doing his best to ignore the way his head immediately began to pound, Kakashi turned to look at her in curiosity. “What kind of bet?”

Sakura waved one hand through the air casually. “Oh just a little thing. If I confront you and get a date then she has to go confront Obito and get a date out of him too.”

Kakashi stared. Swallowed. Shifted in his bed. Stared some more.

There was no porcelain mask to hide the blush this time and it was doubly embarrassing for her to see the line of red that crept overtop the small paper one some nurse had stretched over his mouth. Unless it had been her that put it on him. Had she been a part of his surgery? Had she peeked?

Putting that small panic-inducing thought aside for later, Kakashi had to clear his throat twice before he could string enough words together to respond to his long-time crush.

“Well. I’ve been telling those two to get their heads out of their asses for ages now. Who am I to turn down such an opportunity for them?” He smiled shakily when Sakura snorted.

“For them. Of course.”

“That’s me, the dutiful friend.”

“I hope you make as dutiful a date, Hatake Kakashi.” Sakura’s hand brushed his rather deliberately as she stood and made for the door. “Rumor says you have a habit of being as late for everything as Obito is. If you’re late for our first date I’ll remove your teeth for you.”

She was pink and only soft if you weren’t looking at her muscles – and Kakashi was so in love.

#rae writes #where did all this inspiration come from #i wrote this in like four ish hours #kakasaku #kakashi #sakura #fanfiction #naruto shippuden

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