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raveneira · 4 months

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Hi, I'm sorry in advance if my English is too bad. Can we talk about ksu? Because it seems so wrong and disgusting to me, this ship is just a sidekick for Borusara, which is created by their hatred of Sumire and hate her love Boruto

Nah your english is fine, atleast well enough for me to understand you.

But yea lets talk about Ksu, because its the most disigenuous ship of the entire new gen out done ONLY by KawaAda, which is purely out of hatred for Kawaki but we'll just talk about Ksu for now.

Ksu was seen coming a mile away as soon as it was revealed she would be his caretaker, hell just from the leaks dropping of that panel of her tending to him with Katasuke we already knew the agenda was gonna start, why? not because of the usual ppl shipping things as soon as theres interaction but because they saw a perfect opportunity to keep Kawaki and Sumire away from BoruSara, it worked out perfectly because they get to kill two birds with one stone, keep Sumire away from Boruto and Kawaki away from Sarada, and what better way to do that than to shove them together? it was so obvious.

Lemme tell you I watched in REAL TIME an instagram acc that made OCs of the new gens kids and one was an KawaHima child alongside BoruSara, but as SOON as that panel dropped all the content with the KawaHima kid disappeared and all of a sudden was replaced with a KawaSumi kid instead. It was so so obvious what the agenda was and I can tell you as an eye witness just how fake they all are when it comes to Kawaki ships that they try to pretend is 'genuine' when its really playing keep away.

I saw in real time ppl start shipping MitsuSumi to keep Sumire away from Boruto, but when their interactions became scarce and they saw Kawaki building somewhat of a bond with Hima they jumped ship to KawaHima instead to keep him away from Sarada, but when their relationship became heavily sibling like they got quiet but still lowkey pushed it until they saw that panel of Kawaki and Sumire and thats when they finally found the perfect keep away ship that gets rid of them both at the same time and they've been clingin to that ship with their lives ever since because for once FINALLY they found a keep away ship that has a decent amount of interactions to 'possibly' have a chance unlike the others.

But dont get it twisted because they dont have total faith in KawaSumi either, the reason being because they themselves know that when girls fall inlove in the Narutoverse they STAY inlove and dont move on, and because Sumire loves Boruto they know odds are she'll keep being an obstacle for BoruSara, thats where KawaAda comes in, because since Sumire isnt a 100% garuntee to keep Kawaki away their backup plan is Ada who actually DOES like him and isnt movin on anytime soon.

So on the 50/50 chance Sumire doesnt move on to Kawaki, they have Ada to fall back on atleast to remove Kawaki.

They have tried to lie about these facts whenever anyone called them out on it and claimed 'oh its not keep away ships we just can see the obvious endgame ships being set up unlike yall' and of course their usual deflection 'yall only ship KawaSara because you hate Boruto' which is really just projecting because they only ship KawaSumi/KawaAda because they hate Kawaki, some Sumire too, but they claim its the other way around to try to take the spotlight off of them because they KNOW their the ones really hate shipping.

Lets not forget how they play down Sumire's feelings as 'just a crush' but paint Sarada's as 'true love' even though only one of them have confirmed romantic feelings and it isnt Sarada, Sumire's love is described with the same kanji as Sakura's for Sasuke, and unless you gonna try and argue Sakura's feelings were also just a crush then your either in denial or just a complete dumbass.

People WANT her feelings to be just a crush because then they can push the agenda that she'll move on like Ino, who was the only girl who actually only had a crush on Sasuke and not actual love and had feelings for another guy as well. However ALL the girls who loved ONE guy and ONLY one guy and were NEVER shown to have feelings or interest in anyone else all stayed devoted to the ONE man they loved whether their feelings were returned or not or even if they died, they STAYED inlove with that one man and one man only.

This is why they need to deny Sumire's feelings so hard because its the only way to keep their ship safe, because acknowledging her feelings are genuine and real means she's never movin on which is what they want and what they NEED to feel secure in their shit ship that they fear to death of having any competition because despite being 5+ years, 200+ episodes, and 85+ chapters in they STILL havent gotten ANY confirmation of romantic feelings on either side and that scared tf outta them.

Meanwhile Sumire's feelings are crystal clear and reinforced multiple times to everyone who matters, Sarada, Kawaki, Katasuke, and Amado, all people a part of Boruto and Kawaki's inner circle. The fact that Sarada and Kawaki knows this really gets under their skin because that adds less of a possibility of either of them making a move, Kawaki doesnt care one way or another but even if there were a chance he'd consider it Sumire already killed it before it even had a chance to start which from then on made Kawaki not even think of it because he knows she likes Boruto, it'd be pointless to even look at her that way since he knows she'll never want him anyway and is literally only around him just to hear more about Boruto anyway which is an even bigger turn off from the idea, not that he ever considered it in the first place, but if he WERE to possibly consider it she nipped it in the bud before it could even happen by admitting to him right away that she liked Boruto.

As for Sarada shes even LESS likely to make any moves because Sumire is her friend, she came to her as a friend and asked her how she felt about Boruto and Sarada told her she didnt like him that way which is when Sumire felt comfortable telling Sarada about her feelings then since she wasnt a threat, so how grimey would it be for Sarada to be revealed to have lied when Sumire was trying to be open and honest with her as a friend, Sarada lies to her while secretly liking Boruto behind her back, and even worse, she continues getting closer and closer to him right infront of her face? and now even hugging him infront of her knowing how much shes loved and missed Boruto too? it'd be just like Kishimoto said about Sakura in the Pain arc, that if she suddenly fell for Naruto now after he became the hero of the village she'd look like a terrible woman.

Well the same applies to Sarada, for her to have lied and pretended not to like Boruto all this time after Sumire trusted her to of told her the truth, only to then stab her in the back by still getting closer and closer to him and then rubbing it in her face hugging him infront of her and being hugged back, and to add extra salt to the wound SHES the only one who gets credit for saving and remembering him because Boruto never knew Sumire was unaffected and on his side too, is nothing short of scummy.

Im not saying the hug is romantic or that Sumire is petty enough to be upset over a friend hugging her friend she aint seen in 3 years, Im talking about the PERCEPTION of it. Like Sakura could very well have moved on to Naruto after the Pain arc, especially with the events that happened at the 5 kage summit it would've been more than justified for her to give up on Sasuke and love the guy thats always been there for her since day one and loved her sincerely, but the PERCEPTION looks terrible because like I said she only loved him after he became a hero and then to make matters worse she completely gave up on Sasuke who she swore to help save and to have loved sincerely yet now she moves onto Naruto just cuz hes nice to her and Sasuke isnt, and the biggest issue being she KNOWS Hinata is inlove with Naruto since day one, thats her friend, so it would be beyond despicable for her to just step on Hinata and only think about herself.

Well the same applies to Sarada here, there isnt anything inherently wrong with her liking Boruto and trying to be with him despite Sumire also liking him but its the HOW thats grimey. If Sarada was upfront with Sumire when she asked and said yea I like Boruto and then Sumire was like ok well I like him too so lets both do our best and no hard feelings, then it wouldnt be an issue cuz their both on the same page and support eachother.

But that is not what happened, what happened is, lets for arguments sake say Sarada does love him, then she blatantly lied to Sumire and never told her the truth after learning how she felt, she kept her feelings secret from her which alone is foul play, but she doesnt even try to help or support Sumire in her feelings for him which yea she isnt obligated to do but again her keeping her feelings secret and then not even supporting Sumire just looks hella grimey like she doesnt want them to get closer and is glad shes the one who gets to spend the most time with him having the advantage over her.

To make it even uglier all their interactions up till that point take on a whole new shady meaning if you look at it with the assumption that Sarada loves him and lied to Sumire about it. Her running off to save Boruto because she 'cant stand back and do nothing' comes off like a sly jab at Sumire for being logical and staying behind, like 'you dont care for him like I do'.

Another scene that has an ugly meaning now is when she asks her dad to save Boruto, she takes in ALL this info from Sumire and yet doesnt relay any of it to Sasuke or mentions Sumire to him, she makes it seem as if this is all her figuring out and that he should 'just trust her' and save him, it literally wouldnt have taken up any extra time for her to say that Sumire thinks Ada caused some huge mass brainwashing to make Boruto everyones target instead of Kawaki, but now it just looks like she wanted all the credit for herself and purposefully left Sumire out.

Then comes the timeskip and its revealed that Sarada has just been bitching at Shikamaru and co for these past 3 years straight, 'fighting' for Borutos innocence and even comparing herself to Naruto who she couldnt be further from btw, the audacity to even compare her and Boruto with the Naruto and Sasuke situation is laughable. But whats ugly about this is that she's acting like 'ugh why wont anyone believe me?' and Sumire is just forced to be the level headed one and supress her feelings because Sarada can only think to talk about hers, so far we only see Sumire reaching out to HER more so than Sarada consulting her about anything.

Sumire is the one who plays along with Ada when Sarada nearly blows their cover being so insistent, and Sumire is the one who questions Amado to guage just how much he knows and reports to Sarada what she learned, but you dont see that same teamwork given back from Sarada.

Again none of this is inherently bad on its own, but if your gonna argue Sarada has been inlove with Boruto this whole time and has been lying to Sumire about it, then it makes all these scenes ugly because Sumire trusts her entirely and has been open and honest with her while Sarada has been deceitful. Sumire has been fighting just as hard for Boruto in her own way but from the looks of it only Sarada is gonna get credit for it given how Shikamaru overheard what Amado said and is probably thinking about how Sarada has been saying the same for 3 years straight.

That is just plain shitty and unfair to Sumire's character and all her efforts over the years as well, just because she remained calm and level headed doesnt mean she didnt care about Boruto just as much, and it danm sure doesnt mean she shouldnt get credit just because she hasnt been pointlessly screaming the same things over and over for 3 years straight and instead opted to do something productive instead, yet the only one who will get any credit for Boruto starting to be believed is gonna be Sarada, the same way only Sarada got thanked for saving his life even though she never would've budged if not for Sumire pushing her to act.

But thankfully Sarada isnt that kind of grimey character so none of that ugliness applies to her, so like I said, Sarada knowing about Sumire's feelings makes Sarada even MORE unlikely to consider a relationship because thats her friend who trusted her to be telling the truth, so how grimey would it be for her to still make moves knowing how Sumire feels? Sarada is a good person like her mother, she would NEVER see her friend truly inlove with someone and pursue them anyway behind their back, thats just not who they are.

This is why Kawaki and Sarada knowing Sumire's feelings scares them to death because they know that makes it less likely for them to stand in her way, Kawaki has 0 self worth already so theres no way he would try to snag a girl from his brother when he doesnt even feel he deserves love in the first place and places Boruto on a way higher pedastal than himself so he'd never try to interfere in his romance. Sarada is good friends with Sumire so she'd never lie and go behind her back knowing how she feels about Boruto, Sarada would sooner sacrifice her own feelings than to hurt Sumire like that when she sees how much she truly loves him.

The part that scares them the most about this is that Kawaki doesnt have this same knowledge about Sarada, unlike Sumire who he does know likes Boruto, Kawaki has never noticed any signs of Sarada liking him so from his perspective the two of them are just friends/teammates, which is a huge problem for KawaSara antis because theres nothing holding them back from developing romantic feelings for eachother like there is for Sumire. From Kawaki's perspective Sarada doesnt have anyone she likes, so theres no reason for him to stop himself from falling for her, same way from Sarada's perspective Kawaki doesnt have anyone he likes either, so theres no reason for her to hold back developing feelings for him either. That fact scares them more than you'll ever know cuz they'll never say it but they dont have to, their actions and arguments speak for themselves.

This applies to Boruto too btw, because by him not knowing anyone elses feelings and having no confirmed feelings of his own yet, that leaves him open for anyone atp, as long as hes unaware of anyones feelings then theres nothing holding him back from falling for either girl or someone else entirely.

This is why they NEED Sumire to move on, its the only way they can truly feel safe from any threat she could possibly pose, especially since after chapter 5 Boruto is finally about to find out Sumire is unaffected too and theres no telling how their reunions gonna go which probably has them on edge too not knowing how Boruto is going to react to knowing shes been on his side too all this time.

What scared them even more is that we still dont know how her relationship with Kawaki is atp, they were hoping that Sumire 'pretended' to like Kawaki all this time to keep them being unaffected a secret, but once it was revealed Sarada and Sumire did NOT keep their cover now their just hoping that the two of them got closer over the years as shes been taking care of him this whole time even tho Kawaki only sees her at the lab for a quick routine checkup and then leaves immediately because he cant stand Amado, Sumire never once has gone after or approach Kawaki outside of the lab so why would that change now? especially knowing what hes done to Boruto? but they NEED that to be the case so they can continue to push the 'Kawaki treats her better than any other girl' agenda and that they had positive 'development' while KawaSara's is negative and that Boruto and Sumire dont interact enough for there to really be a bond, even though NH only had 38 pages of interaction, SaiIno only had 2 interactions/moments in the entire manga, and ChoKarui had 0, this is the most laziest and desperate argument they use against BoruSumi as if ships havent happened with far less in this series, now all of a sudden Boruto has 'standards' and only goes with the ships with the most interactions rather than the ships with actual romantic development and confirmation.

BoruSara and KawaSumi are blatantly and completely platonic, there is nothing romantic from either side for either ship, period, ship bait scenes like Sumire, Ada, and Mitsuki asking Sarada how she feels about Boruto is not confirmation if she seriously denies it or doesnt respond at all, its not the same as Kawaki asking Sumire how she feels about Boruto and Sumire confirming she infact does, there is absolutely NO reason for Sarada to be asked 3 times and not a single one does she admit that yea she likes him. It doesnt matter if her and Sumire are both confirmed to like Boruto because its still up to Boruto in the end who he chooses, it doesnt ruin the suspense because the same was done with Sakura and Karin and NOTHING changed because it was up to SASUKE who he chose to be with in the end. So there is literally NO excuse for why Sarada's feelings havent been confirmed in 85+ chapters yet UNLESS she just doesnt have feelings for him, point blank.

So yea bottom like KawaSumi is a disgusting pathetic excuse for a keep away ship that thrives purely off headcanon rather than actual canon material. Just because she's his caretaker doesnt mean shes gonna develop feelings for him, nor that the two are gonna develop a bond, their relationship is purely business as Kawaki stated himself that he doesnt care how she feels as long as she does her job and refers to her as Katasuke's assistant. People make a big deal about him being the only one to call her by name despite it literally making no sense for him to call her anything else because she was never his class rep, so its stupid to even use that as some sort of proof of closeness or whatever.

Im not acknowledging those terrible contradicting Ksu episodes because they completely contradict the manga entirely and its been more than proven atp that not everything in the anime is canon despite the lie that was told in the beginning, just take Sarada being a chunin with 2 tomoe for example while shes a genin with 3 tomoe in the manga since the Boro fight and now an MS. The fact that Ikemoto kept up with the anime every week yet only ever acknowledged Sumire and the mist arc says all you need to know about these so called 'anime canon' episodes.

There was a whole Mitsuki arc about Boruto and Sarada finding out he was a clone while in the manga Mitsuki just made an comment on it to Katasuke and thats how Boruto and Sarada found out, same goes for Kawaki being made an official genin and gone on several missions while in the manga Kawaki never became an official ninja, there are so many instances where the anime blatantly contradicts the manga that theres no way you can consider them both canon in its entirety.

If Ikemoto wanted to reference anything from the anime he would have like his did Sumire and the mist arc, and yet theres been radio silence for anything anime only related since then unless you wanna count Code's hair being red and Mugino getting more development in the anime so his death would have more weight, neither of which was any groundbreaking inclusions, not even getting more context on how Ao survived really mattered because the guy literally dies in the exact same arc hes revealed to be alive in so who gives af? why did we need context for him and some rando Mugino only introduced to die in that very same arc? what did we gain from that? nothing. The 'How you use it' lesson was already being taught through Katasuke and co, Ao was not needed for that lesson to be learned and if he was removed nothing would change, and Mugino in both the anime and manga really had no substantial impact other than some temporary sad feels and then moved on like he never existed, him having added 'depth' when he was doomed to die early on and forgotten was a complete and utter waste of time that again if you removed him nothing would change because nothing really came from his death or his inclusion.

So yea I dont count the entire anime as canon because theres way too many contradictions, and even the few things they expand on doesnt really add much or was pointless anyway because it leads to nothing, its all in the moment and then forgotten about, its nothing like the land of waves arc with Zabuza and Haku who had a long term substantial impact on both the story and team 7, Ao was forgettable and pointless whose death had no meaning, same for Mugino, and Shojoji, all forgettable pointless villains from mediocre arcs with minimal to no substantial impact on any of the characters or story, the most you can argue Shojoji did was foreshadow Kara, which didnt need him anyway since we were shown Kara having a conversation anyway, that was the forshadowing right there. What did we really need the Mujina bandits for? just for Boruto to have a pitiful Naruto and Konohamaru rip off? which btw the whole thing with Tento also was completely pointless because best believe he is NEVER appearing in the story again.

I could go on and on but you get the point, the anime is a clown show 99% of the time so I dont take half these arcs seriously and I danm sure dont take those Ksu episodes seriously either because they contradict EVERYTHING that happened in the manga.

Naruto was the first person to care about and vouch for Kawaki, not Sumire, nor did he need anyone to 'beg' and 'convince' him to have mercy on him

Naruto was the first person to greet Kawaki when he was brought back to the village and assured him that he was safe, not Kawaki waking up alone in a locked room with his hands binded and being knocked out with gas when he tried to escape, he also wasnt shot with fire multiple times by the police force or nearly had his arm bit off by Nue who till this day has YET to make a single appearance in the manga but sure go off SP

Naruto [and Kurama] was the ones who opened up and related to Kawaki about Narutos past and compared Kawaki to Naruto, not Sumire with her 'Hes just like me' bs that couldnt be further from the truth and never once been stated in the manga

Kawaki's fear of needles was showcased when he ACTUALLY first interacted with Sumire at the hospital where he rejected it, he does not get over that fear until much later after the Isshiki fight and much development with Naruto and team 7, but in the anime Kawaki gets over his fear of needles the same episode he rejects it

In the manga Boruto was pissed at Kawaki because he broke Himas vase accidentally when trying to escape, in the anime Boruto is pissed at him because he attacked Sumire and then stupidly changed Kawaki breaking the vase from being accidental while trying to escape, to being him just lashing out and smashing the table cuz Boruto pissed him off. All cuz they didnt allow Naruto to assert dominance to get Kawaki to stop running away and instead just made Boruto needlessly hostile towards Kawaki over Sumire [which again never happened in the manga] and then Kawaki breaking the vase cuz he just lashed out in anger rather than him trying to escape like in the manga.

Nobody else besides KawaSumi shippers acknowledges those episodes for obvious reasons, but the hilarious part about it is that SP realized they fked up when they saw the manga didnt support anything they set up and went a completely opposite direction so they just pretended those episodes didnt even exist and never happened and didnt let them interact again until they began adapting actual manga content again, which is hilarious because I cant tell you how many Ksu fans were hypin up how Sumire and Kawaki were gonna have way more development and that this or that arc was gonna include her etc and nothing happened lol

These are just a handful of their foolishness but you get the point, none of this came to fruition like they thought it would and yet they were all so cocky and calling other fandoms with sense enough to see their relationship was never gonna be anything more than caretaker and patient ended up getting slapped in the face.

That stupid ending of Kawaki and Sumire standing near bamboo lead to nothing, it was just random shots like one of the replies said because believe it or not, not every anime opening/ending is symbolic of anything canon or gonna happen, just look at that one ice monster opening with the sand trio that NEVER happened. Some openings/endings really are just visuals and have no other meaning beyond that, the bamboo thing was one prime example of that.

People clung to that bamboo symbolism with their lives because of her name forgetting her name isnt even really Kakei, she changed it to go undercover to attack the leaf, her real name is Shigaraki which essentially means death but you'll never see them acknowledge that fact cuz it pokes a hole in their whole ridiculous theory

Like they are actually deadass about the name thing even though its never a canon thing thats brought up anywhere. Sumire's primary symbolism is the flower shes named after, violet, which in hanakotoba means 'sincerity' which is a clear reference to her character and her love for Boruto as being 'sincere', blowing their whole 'its just a crush' argument out of the water.

Then theres the ridiculousness of making the connection between Kawaki's name meaning dry and Sumires surname meaning bamboo shoot like whats used to carry water which is just...just so stupid for so many reasons because again, the connection between Sumire and bamboo is never even addressed in any canon material, not only that but if they want to make the connection then they need to not half step and tell the whole true about the ACTUAL symbolism of bamboo.

Long story short, literally the meaning of her name they cling to so much is about SUMIRE'S character, nothing to do with Kawaki, even its connection to Kaguya-hime is a reference to Sumire's Gozu tennou and Nue being connected to Kaguya. The bamboo is symbolic of strength, simplicity and prosperity all of which apply to Sumire's character, it also meaning loyalty and steadfastness is even more reference to her character and feelings for Boruto, she is loyal and steadfast, she is strong and not easily moved no matter the situation and is able to stay calm and firm like the bamboo root during an earthquake.

It also being symbolic of purity and innocence goes along with her first name meaning sincerity, Sumire is a pure and sincere person, as are her feelings for Boruto.

So if we gonna use name symbolism as evidence then lets use ALL of it not just the surface level bs like 'her name means bamboo shoot which holds water and Kawakis name means dry so that means Sumire is gonna be the water he needs to heal his heart' yatta yatta yatta nonsense.

They try to make everything about Sumire some hidden connection to Kawaki which literally no other fandoms do but Ksu and Bsa for obvious reasons. These people wont even let Sumire be her own character even down to her name which as I've pointed out, has nothing to do with Kawaki but everything to do with Sumire herself as a character. Even her job they said was for Kawaki rather than her own ambition/goal for herself, they tried to make it about her being there for Kawaki only for it to be revealed its cuz shes suspicious of Amado and wants to hear more about Boruto, but then they even tried to twist that and say she wasnt concerned about Boruto at all and just Kawaki, but then when she says herself that shes worried about them both they defaulted back to she'll move on from Boruto as she gets closer to Kawaki and that Kawaki is jealous of Sumire's feelings for Boruto which...was yet another stupid agenda of theirs they tried to push. Everything she does at the science department is for Kawaki, and her suspicion and fear of Amado is for Kawaki, shes not a scientist because of her own goals and ambitions, and shes not suspicious and confronting Amado because hes a threat to her village and clearly up to no good, no its all about Kawaki.

They want her to be Kawaki centric the same way they want Sarada to be Boruto centric, only unfortunately Sarada is being turned into just that but thankfully Sumire hasnt been reduced to that as of yet and has her priorities in the right place and zero interest in Kawaki. Even in the recent chapter shes asking Amado about Boruto trying to see if he's still Amados target and is shocked when he confesses that he knows somethings up with his memories and have set his sights back on Kawaki who is his real target. Her immediate response was to go tell Sarada that Amado is not another person who sees through omnipotence, not to go warn Kawaki that Amado is now plotting on him again and to be careful. No, her primary focus is on reporting to Sarada that Amado knows somethings up and is no longer targeting Boruto.

I dunno how clearer it needs to be made that Sumire does NOT give af about Kawaki like that and vice versa, Sumire treats Kawaki no different than she would anyone else, and Kawaki treats her no different than he treats Katasuke, shes just doing her job, no more no less.

Sorry for the long rant and tbh even with this being as long as it is I STILL have more I could say about this shit ship that its fans have the audacity to say KawaSara is dead yet KawaSumi isnt which is beyond hilarious when the girl cant even stop sweating and staring at Kawaki in fear ever since she learned he killed Boruto and hasnt thought about him at all since is laughable that ANY of them fit their mouths to call anyones ship dead when their ship dont even talk outside of occassional short lab visits, but these same ppl wanna talk about other ships lacking meaningful interactions. Gtf outta here man.

Anyway just wanna put it out here now to not go look for or harrass any of the ppl in these screenshots cuz that was not the point of me showing em, I only showed them to back up my claims about alot of the bs thats been said in defense of the ship, I do not condone harassing or going after ppl so I ask that everybody chill and leave them be.

These kinds of ppl cant be reasoned with anyway, they've really convinced themselves to believe their own delusions and are determined to stay there even when all canon signs says otherwise so its pointless to even engage anyway, let them stay deluded and let them keep talkin because thats exactly what NS and SK did and we all know what happened to them so theres no need for yall to argue with these ppl anyway, karma will strike in due time, just gotta be patient.

But yea those are my thoughts on Ksu, hopefully this wasnt too long of a read for you lol sorry.

#anti-bsa #anti-ksu #pro borusumi #pro kawasara #rave responds #anti ksu #anti-kawaada #anti-kawaeida

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vldkeith · 3 years

Text

Dolphin Kisses

a/n: This fic is based/inspired from my experience at this boat ride thing I went on some time ago and I just klance-ified it lol. Anyways this whole fic is just some super cheesy stuff my brain barfed up and yeah, I have nothing else to say besides enjoy <33 -Klance Day

☆°☆°☆° ☆

Lance wanted to go on a date with Keith; but not just any date. The perfect date. So Lance finds himself in front of the wheel, driving Keith to the oceanfront. It was a really pleasant day outside. The scent of the salty sea grew stronger as the scenery changed from suburban family homes to tourist attraction stops and stores. Radio songs hummed in the background and filtered out from the open car windows. Lance peeks at his right to Keith, just to make sure that he was having a good time. “‘You excited to be on a boat, mullet?” he asks cheerfully. “For the last time, Lance, I don’t know. It’s my first time.” “I know, I know. You’re worried about getting seasick,” Lance nonchalantly waves off. “But not to worry, babe. If you feel the slightest weakness, don’t be hesitant to fall into my arms.“ Keith scoffs at his dramatics. “Sure.” ☆°☆°☆° They finally reach The White Lion boat ride dock, and Lance parks the car on the old, cracking concrete below it. The two walk out and start heading towards the ticket and tour center, but to be honest, the “center” was more of a big shack with dull yellow and pink paint peeling right off of it. Lance pulls out his phone and shows the lady at the front desk his reservation time. She nods wordlessly and hands him two white tickets. Lance smiles and runs back to Keith, waving the paper slips in the air. “Let’s go!” He points towards the line on the dock to the boats. A few boats line the edge of the water. Lance motions his hand to the purple one with waves. “That’s the boat we’re getting on." Keith grins and scoots a little closer to Lance as more people fill up the wooden platform. Lance plants a light kiss on his head. A few minutes later, a bulky man walks by the clustered line. "The 4:30PM White Lion’s Roar boat tour has been canceled due to an engine malfunction,” he starts. Lance’s heart drops to his shoes and frowns. He glances at Keith, who wears a similar expression. “You can get refunds at the ticket center and come back another day, or book for a another boat at a later time,” the man finishes. “We are sorry for any inconvenience this may have caused. Have a good evening.” As soon as the man walks away, dissapointed murmers ripple throughout the crowd. They all start to disperse and head towards the ticket desk. “I’m sorry,” Lance sighs. So much for a perfect date, he thinks. “It’s okay,” Keith comforts. “We can just go on another boat.” He grabs Lance’s arm and tugs as they walk back to get new tickets. This time, Keith is at the desk, and Lance stays back. He blows out a puff of air, slightly smiling at his boyfriend. Sometimes, he still can’t believe that they’ve been dating for almost four months now. Keith reaches back to Lance to show off their new tickets. He starts to explain, “I got another boat tour for five o'clock. Don’t worry it’s the same price and we got refunded from the first tickets. It’s a slower boat, but it goes farther, and it garuntees dolphin sightings.” Lance smirks. “That’s my Keith,” he responds. ☆°☆°☆° Twenty minutes later, a new line has fully formed for the new, bigger boat. Two kids and a grandma are chattering beside Lance and Keith. “Look, there’s a Poké-Spot on the boat!” one of the kids cheers. “Quit your Pokémon Go-ing,” the grandma snaps. Lance chuckles and turns his attention back to Keith. Soon, people began boarding. Right before they stepped on the boat, a young lady with a White Lion t-shirt stops the two boys. “Excuse me sirs,” she raises her camera. “But we are offering pictures for the boat ride that you can purchase at the end of the ride. Would you like to take a picture?” “Sure,” Lance replies as he wraps his arm around Keith and makes a peace sign with his free hand. “Smile!” The lady clicks her camera. “Thank you for choosing The White Lion boat tours,” she welcomes. ☆°☆°☆° Lance and Keith both decided beforehand that they wanted to go to the second floor of the boat, so they scurry quickly up the stairs in hopes to get a good spot. Thankfully, they manage to grab spots at the front. Lance sits down on the bench and Keith plops right beside him. As soon as the boat starts humming, a voice comes to the speakers. “Hello, and welcome to The White Lion’s Pounce boat tour,” a supposedly Australian man cheers. “My name is Coran, and I will be your guide on this trip. Firstly, let’s go over some safety rules.” The man goes on to explain where the life jackets are, what to do if you feel seasick, and other various things to know when on a boat. Lance can tell the Keith’s attention has already wandered from the peppy voice’s informative talks. Right now, Keith is staring out onto the long stretch of water before them, and Lance couldn’t help but smile. “But Lance! I don’t even like the beach!” He could still hear Keith’s complaints from a couple days ago. “It will be fun, babe! New experiences and all,” Lance persuaded. “Besides, I already bought the tickets, so we have to go.” Lance’s pleading worked, of course. It’s just his natural charming boyfriend skills. ☆°☆°☆° The boat finally made its way out of the dock and through the mouth of the small river into the ocean. People fishing on the edge of the big rocks and stones waved as the boat went by. Eventually, Lance stands up to the railing, and looks out. The boat was gently gliding on the water, rocking slightly with the dips and peaks of the waves. Keith joins him in a little bit, placing his hand over Lance’s, which was already on the rail. Now, the scene was different. The boat is gliding at a steady pace parallel to the boardwalk. From the distance, the people, umbrellas, towels, and small tents looked like blended spots dotting the long stretch of beach. Behind them stood hotels and restaurants varying in size, color, and shape. Lance spots a Marriot, a Hilton, and a Holiday Inn as they pass by. The Marriot looked the newest with its glassy, black exterior. Soon, the long and busy boardwalk mellowed down to the more open, lesser used beach. Hotels turned into private rental houses, and the crowds faded. Lance pointed to a small lilac house. “'You wanna stay there someday for a vacation?” he jokingly asks Keith. The other boy scoffs in response. “As if. More than a day at this sandy giver of salt and sunburns and I will actually die.” Lance giggles. “Okay, you vampire.” Keith glances away as his mouth turns upwards in a slight grin. ☆°☆°☆° A few more minutes pass when the boat halts to an even slower turtle’s pace. The speakers crackle as Coran begins to speak. “We are approaching our dolphin sight-seeing spot, folks!” he says with almost too much enthusiasm. “While you keep your eyes peeled for them, take a moment to look again in front of you to our very own Seagull’s Peak Lighthouse! Originally built in…” Lance’s ears blocks out the rest because his eyes are busy darting around for any signs of dolphins. Finally, a gray fin popped up from the water. “Dolphin!” Lance yells. Keith turns his head around to where Lance’s eyes were staring. “'Looks like we spotted our first dolphins! Ladies and gentlemen, look out for more.” The crowd oohed and ahhed as more and more dolphins appear splash around the boat. Coran continues, talking more about the dolphins. Lance spots Keith grinning excitedly at the intermittent dolphins. He smiles to himself, content with the fact that his boyfriend was enjoying this too. ☆°☆°☆° Eventually, the boat turned around and they were heading back the way they came. Keith had prompted that both of them go downstairs for a change, and Lance happily agreed. The boat was shaking and rocking back and forth as it made its way through the water, so it was hard to balance when walking. Fortunately, Keith and Lance had each other’ hands to hold on to, so they walk to and down the stairs and towards the front much easier. “Woah,” Keith gasps when he sees rests his hands on the railing, looking on to the ocean from a much closer view. “Yeah. This thing’s going pretty fast, isn’t it?” Keith opens his mouth to respond, but was cut off by a random child squealing. “Mommy! Look it’s a rainbow!” Keith and Lance look up to see a faded, but visible arch of colors that the girl was pointing too. Other families took notice and began to stare in awe. “That’s kinda gay,” Lance jokes, lightheartedly jabbing Keith’s side with his elbow. Keith snickers along. He smirks, arching an eyebrow. “You think?” ☆°☆°☆° “And that concludes our boat ride! Thank you, ladies and gentlemen, for choosing the White Lion! Photos are available for purchase at the docking point of the boat. Have a wonderful evening.” The speakers crackle again after the announcement before playing random pop songs as it did at the beginning of the tour. Soon, the air fills with sounds chatting and talking as the passengers filed out of the boat onto the dock. Lance and Keith were among one of the last people to go out, so it was less crowded when they finally step onto the platform. The lady from before handed them their photo from the start of the trip, and soon, the two were back in the car. This time, Keith was in the driver’s seat. “So,” Lance starts. “How did you like it?” he asks in a sing song voice. “It was good,” Keith responds, putting on his seat belt. He should have been happy, but Lance deflates from how monotone Keith sounded. “That’s all?" Keith must have taken notice of Lance’s grimace because he quickly rushed to add a supposedly forced, "It was great! The dolphins and rainbow were very cool!” “I thought you were enjoying it,” Lance reprimands, his lips pursed and brows tight. “I guess not.” “No, Lance, it’s not like that,” Keith trails. “I had a really good time.” “You don’t have to lie about it.” Keith pouts in response, but doesn’t press any further. He plugs the key into the car, and they leave the parking lot in silence. ☆°☆°☆° Lance stares out the window, taking in the busy streets of the oceanfront. He expects that in a few minutes, the sight would be gone as they leave the area, but as more time passes, it seems that they were going deeper in. “Hey, are you sure we’re going the right way?” Lance asks, not even moving his head to face Keith. “Yes.” He hears in response. “But it looks like we’re heading towards the beach,” Lance counters, finally turning his attention to his boyfriend. “It almost seems like that’s the point,” Keith replies, voice sarcastically high. “Are you taking us…?” Lance doesn’t finish his sentence, and Keith doesn’t bother to fill it in. ☆°☆°☆° The car comes to a halt on a sandy parking lot. A couple of children chase and run around eachother as adults pop open their trunks to take out various beach toys and towels. Keith’s seat belt clicks open, and opens the door to come out. He motions his hands for Lance to come out as well, but Lance was still trying to process what they might even be doing here. “Come on,” Keith drags. “We don’t have all day.” “Okay..” Lance tags the word with suspicion. He steps out and joins Keith. The two walk down the sandy ramp to the actually beach. They walk wordlessly, until finally, they reach the water. Keith plops down on the semi wet sand, and pats down next to him for Lance to follow. He sits down. Now, Lance was throughly confused. “What are we doing here?” He finally asks. “You, like, hate the beach.” “Yeah, but you love it.” Lance’s face flushes when he sees Keith give a small smile. “I thought that I could make it up to you if I brought you here. I’m sorry for not being enthusiastic enough,” Keith mumbles. Lance perks up, and he waves his arms. “No, Keith! I’m sorry. I should have trusted you when you said you were having a good time,” he huffs. “I was just expecting a little more response than a ‘It was good.’ But it’s okay, I know you meant well.” He slowly wraps an arm around Keith and pulls him closer. “Thanks for bringing us here,” Lance whispers into Keith’s hair. “I appreciate it.” The Sun dips behind them, creating a soft blend of blues, oranges, and pinks all around the beach. Waves peacefully crash up and down, creating one of the only noises on the lesser crowded beach. Lance pretends nobody else is there but him and Keith as he leans forward to kiss him. One kiss turned to two, to three, to more than he could keep track of. Soon enough, they were both smiling so hard, none of them could continue. The giggle and hug; Lance only occasionally pressing his lips against Keith’s forehead. “Hey, you,” Lance sighs contently. “Hey.” “'Wanna know a secret?” The other boy smirks. “Yeah.” Lance leans to Keith’s ear before whispering, “I love you.” Keith stifles a laugh. “That wasn’t a secret, idiot.” “But it still made your heart race, didn’t it?” Lance light heartedly retorts. Instead of giving a proper response, Keith pulls Lance in for another kiss. “'Love you too,” he finally says with a barely audible voice. Sometimes Lance wonders what he did to deserve someone as wonderful as Keith. He doesn’t know, and probably never will. That doesn’t stop him from loving Keith, though. He’ll never stop loving Keith.

#voltron #klance #klance fanfiction #lance mcclain #keith kogane #I LOVE IT KLANCE DAY...SO CUTE 🥺🥺🥺#makes me want to go to a beacha sdkjghfdsjkghfjdsk #txt

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athys-obelia · 3 years

Text

of swords and rubies

synopsis: on athanasia de alger obelia's eighteenth birthday, she sits in the ruby palace awaiting her father's present - a sweet little mandate sentencing her to death. the news his personal guard arrives with, though, is quite the different from what she expects.

character/s: athanasia de alger obelia, claude de alger obelia, felix robane

part: one / ?

warning/s: mentions of death / execution, poisoning, tlp!claude is a shit dad, tlp!felix supremacy

|•| ruby palace |•| 10:45 am |•|

"a visitor from the emperor's place, your highness."

lilian york's voice has always carried the same gentleness. for as long as she can remember, athanasia has heard softness, music, safety, in lily - the voice of a mother. the realisation, long overdue, hits her as she inquires after her mysterious guest. i've never addressed lily as such, have i?

the brunette tries for a smile. "it is his majesty's personal guard, princess, sir felix from the robane duchy. i have hannah showing him to the visitors' lounge - perhaps the knight comes bearing good news?"

the blonde princess smiles, nodding hopefully. it's all she can do for lily, she guesses, the woman who cared for her like one of her own. just as lily's smile never dimmed once during the past eighteen years, athanasia supposes she must now return the favour.

but lily never saw her father's eyes that night.

lily hadn't seen his stance harden at the mere sight of her.

the malice, the poison in claude de alger obelia's voice wasn't directed at lily.

so lily couldn't possibly know. for all athanasia knows claude could be in his study, spinning a roulette wheel to decide how to have her executed. he'd want her gone by the earliest, she assumes, probably before jennette can wake and intercede for her - or evidence is found towards the actual culprit.

either way, if the least she could do was comfort lily somewhat with a little, hopeful smile, then the smile would be priority.

|•| ruby palace |•| 11:00 am |•|

"sir," athanasia greets, recoiling as the knight grins at her. she'd heard stories of the atmosphere in the imperial palace, the deceptive, snake-like nature of noble court - surely, with a father so prominent in both politics and obelia's military, felix robane was one to be vary of.

and - being her father's personal guard would require being similarly ruthless and cunning, would it not? this smiley knight could always be the one poisoning her father against her behind their backs.

"to what do i owe this pleasure?"

the redhead attempts lightening the mood with another bright grin. "greetings to the star of the obelian empire. may the gods' blessings be with you, princess. today, i have come as a messenger regarding his majesty's wish that you join him for breakfast-"

"-wh, what? no, i... i'm not going anywhere with you."

felix robane's natural smile falls. "what is it, princess?"

athanasia steps backwards in defense as the knight tries comforting her, a trembling hand raised to cover her mouth. "y-you can tell his majesty i won't...won't be joining him."

"but, princess-"

not daring to move her eyes from the redhead, athanasia reaches for an hourglass resting on the mantle beside her, holding it up in defense. "go back. go and tell the emperor to send me the death warrant himself. there's no need to build such a roundabout way of-"

felix grimaces. "you may be misunderstanding the situation, prin-"

"-don't 'princess' me. if he has the guts, have my father tell me his decision himself. you can't force me to leave. i won't, i won't be led out of my home with you pretending as if everything is fine."

the knight holds up his hands in surrender. "you have the higher status of the two of us, your highness, i wouldn't dare pushing you into anything you do not like. i'm afraid you cannot refute the emperor's word, however. but...but if your highness has questions, i can promise to answer with complete honesty."

"how can i trust you?"

felix taps his chin in thought. "as a knight, my value is measured not by my skill, but the trust put in me by those i am pledged to. my oath is to the obelian emperor. you, princess, are his majesty's heir, so as along as your commands do not undermine the emperor's, you are included in the oath."

athanasia blinks, studying the knight. he seems to be curling into himself so as to not be percieved as a threat. she watches his careful movements, irate. "i read a book once..." she starts, feeling self conscious all of sudden. do i sound like a madwoman?

felix robane nods eagerly. "i was told the princess was an avid reader."

she flushes, glaring at her lap. "...anyway, in the book, the king's sister married a traitor, and because they were technically royalty, he couldn't just kill them under charges of treason. so instead, the king had their food poisoned."

athanasia watches the subtext register on the knight's face. "your highness...no, i- his majesty has no such thing planned. i can assure you - the matter is actually quite the opposite."

"...is it?"

he stares at his lap before looking up at her determinedly. "i can't say i know how your highness feels about your father, but...he needs you right now." felix sighs softly, "as you know, her highness the princess jennette hasn't yet regained consciousness. this makes you his majesty's most favourable heir."

athanasia stares at the hourglass in her hand before setting it down. interest piqued, she eyes the fidgeting knight. "why would you bring this up, sir robane, and to me of all people? is the emperor perhaps...ill?"

the look in the redhead's eyes is more than enough confirmation. athanasia grips the arm of her seat. "he has been having the strangest migraines ever since...well, a little after your debut, actually. except lately, these headaches seem to be weakening him. quite a lot."

a cold sweat creeping up her neck, athanasia downs a glass of water before turning to the distressed knight. "i assume you want my assistance in hiding this from the nobles. since jennette isn't here."

"essentially, yes." he nods once more. "with all the commotion surrounding princess jennette, both the nobles and commoners are watching the palace diligently. the factions are too divided - of course, a large portion of the nobles support princess jennette as your father's heir, most of them being blood purists, while an equally large believe you are more competent, having been raised in the palace. regrettably, it isn't just the nobles - we have a delegation arriving at the palace soon enough to settle matters regarding the southern territory. we cannot afford weakening his majesty's image, not right now."

her eyes flicker to the obelian coat of arms on felix's shoulder, and the sigil of house robane embroidered on his cloak. "i don't suppose i have much of choice in the matter - but since urgency of the situation affects my country, i doubt i would've refused anyway. but, sir felix..." she pauses, studying his expression, "my father's palace doesn't garuntee my safety. so i must call on your oath as a knight now."

"of course, your highness." hesitantly, as if he held a china doll in his hands, felix murmurs, "it can be a chance to get closer to his majesty, too. er - that is, if only your highness wishes it to be."

nodding, athanasia stares at her hands. "...perhaps."

|•| emperor's palace |•| 3:00 pm |•|

with her father's stare scrutinising her every move, she bows deeply in greeting.

his gaze is different, athanasia notices. the malice is gone. the hatred has dissipated.

now, as if she were a complicated math problem, claude de alger obelia stares her down, a spark of challenge alight in his eyes. "don't worry your head too much about it," he starts, "i haven't called you here for any special reason."

"...i see."

he tilts his head curiously, studying her reactions still. "oh? what's this? no declarations of love today? no pleading for attention? you're strangely quiet for someone so full of demands."

she fidgets with her dress, a deep red blooming on her cheeks in embarrassment. "i apologise if my words troubled your majesty."

claude nods slowly, eyes tracing her unkempt hair. "you overestimate yourself, princess."

athanasia inhales sharply. what does he want?

"felix's method of conveying information is a bit... exaggerated, at times," the blonde emperor says, watching her grimace under his stare, "i'm here to clear up any misunderstandings he may have unknowingly planted."

"ye, yes?"

claude's hand lands on his sheathed sword. athanasia blood freezes as he pulls it out, slowly, eyes not moving from hers. "i'm assuming you've been told of the council being held tomorrow. it will be your unofficial entrance into politics, so i hope there won't be any...mistakes. you'll need the nobility's support."

she nearly snorts. you wouldn't hesitate in burying anyone who dared look jennette in the eyes, i'm sure. still, athanasia tries smiling - lily always smiled whenever she was unsure of what to say, after all - and lets go of her skirt, nodding. "there won't be any."

the last time she spoke to her father, she'd known that whether or not he decided on mercy, she wouldn't be talking to him again. thus the courage to empty her heart, lighten her shoulders. now... now, athanasia didn't know what to think. how to act.

she flinches when he speaks, hands tracing the edge of the blade lightly. "do think this sword is important to me, athanasia?"

an odd warmth courses through her at the sound of her name. or was it because of the voice, the owner of the voice? she honestly couldn't tell. "your majesty..." athanasia swallows - what's the right answer? - "i would assume so. i'm no knight, of course...but, a sword is effective for both defense and offense in battle. and i hear your majesty's swordsmanship is unrivaled in obelia, so...yes, i think."

she watches claude draw in a long breath, staring at the weapon. "it's interesting that you think so. but at the end of the day, the sword is just another weapon, isn't it? i can always have better ones at the flick of my wrist."

"your...majesty?"

a drop of blood runs down the emperor's finger as he runs it along the edge of the blade. "it is useful, isn't it? at least...as long as i decide it is. a simple tool's value will always be decided by me, after all."

cold dread settles into athanasia's bones. "i...i see, sire."

nodding approvingly, claude de alger obelia places the beautiful sword in her hands. "happy birthday, princess."

#wmmap #sbapod #who made me a princess #suddenly became a princess one day #claude de alger obelia #athanasia de alger obelia #anastacius de alger obelia #felix robane #felix robain

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heliosthegriffin · 3 years

Text

Farmer Jaune #1

AN: here’s a little background for you people, places, or things, I love Stardew Valley... That’s all.

Summary: Jaune takes a bet with his father that if he can get the old family farm up in running he’ll have shown enough dedication to be a huntsman.

Forteen year old Jaune stood in front of ‘The Club’ at lunch time carrying large crate of assorted fruits on his left shoulder for this Junior guy to try, while in his right he played on his scroll while the two bouncers out front refused to let him in.

Sure, he could barge in, but that’d be rude and create a bad impression on a potential buyer. So the stuck up suits could glare at him all they wanted, he’d wait till Junior saw him or picked up his scroll, or they finally let him in.

Huh, who knew Spruce Willis liked to garden, another reason to look to the guy as a man among men.

The two suits kept a steady glare on the boy with bangs covering the his right eye, only leaving a single blue orb to stare at his scroll. He was all lean muscle, tanned skin, and sun-bleached hair package up in a dirt stained tee and blue jeans.

They’re were sure that they could take him, and there were no notices about a fruit shipments, so they were ready to put down a scam-artist if they had too. Though, if he was a scam-artist he really was easy going.

“So, ‘Mr. Arc’,” One of the suits said as sarcastically as possible.

“Just Jaune.” Jaune said boredom, hoping Junior wasn’t messing with him, if he was he’d have to sic dad on him.

The guards snicker. “Ok Just Jaune,” Jaune rolls his single visible eye. “What do you got in the crate?” “Are you mugging me? Because if you are that’s just lame, it’s a crate full of fruit, how poor are you if need to mug a man for fruit? Delicious, juicy fruit sure, but just fruit.” Jaune say rapid-fire without looking up from him scroll.

The suit who spoke up went flush with anger at the insinuation, he worked for the damn mob! He made very good illegal money! He didn’t even recorded it to the irs that’s how bad he was!

Suit two just snickered at his friend. “I think what my buddy meant was what do have in the box to sell to the boss, and why do you think he’d buy from you over importing from Mistral or bulk buying from the Agri-Dis?”

Jaune rolled his eye again. “For the fourth time he asked me to bring him a crate, which I would have delivered to him by now, and gotten some lunch to if you two lumper didn’t get in the way.”

“And for the fourth time your not on the list, so try sell us on your product and we might let you in!” The first suit said exsperated. “Also why not just eat some produce?”

Jaune shrugged. “Same reason, I’m going to refuse to sell any to you two right now, cause I have things called standards. I always include a little extra on the orders so that people know their appreciated! If I took that away, it’d ruin the magic!”

Jaune then said with a smile, “That said if you’re interested, I can give my website to place an order, and little peak of the goods too.” Jaune said wiggling an eyebrow.

The second suit let out a tired sigh, knowing that this would be long day already. “Ok, back to my second question first, why would anyone buy from you some dirty looking kid from outside the city walls, instead of the nice clean stalls at the Agri-Dis? Also, I make good money wouldn’t I just import good food from Mistral or Vacuo?”

“Ok, find you’ve worn me down fine. Ok first, the Agric-Dis’s food is abysmal grown for two thing!” Jaune said putting away his scroll, and then holding up two finger making them glow with the light of his soul, making both guards jump at the realization this boy was also a hunter in training. “Bulk production, and fast regrowth speed, they inject Earth dust into the soil to make it more fertile, and genetically mod the plants so they grow as fast as possible and big as possible with account for taste! Which to be fair isn’t a bad thing, the city is overpopulated as is, and the Agri-Dis needs to feed everyone, and neither dust usage or gene mods are intrinsically bad, just that bulk produce doesn’t always taste as good as growing something with love and care!”

The two suits inched back in shock at Jaunes passionate rant, and the first suit recovered faster and asked. “Alright, you’ve made a good point. But what about outsourcing production to Mistral or Oasis in Vacuo? They’re food is really good!”

Jaune held a finger as he regained his breath.

“Ok, that’s a fair point, Vacuo has a warmer climate than Vale so it’s easier to grow more crop in season there in certain areas, and Mistral has the same benefit, but, it’s not the food that bad but the prices, and time you have to wait in between shipments.”

The suits leaned in with interest.

“This also has a couple problems, compared to my products.” Jaune holding up his free hand, letting it glow freely to attract the suits attention. “First, is the price you’d paying is roughly three time as much as my own for virtually the same product.” Jaune said slowly and methodically, letting it sink into the mens minds, he’d never let a potential customer get away, even if they were goons.

“Second is bidding, when you order from out of kingdom your have to compete with everyone else who wants that food, which also is reason the price is higher they can afford to hike it because it’s in demand, so since it’s in demand that means people want it, which implies scarcity, so even if you place an order there no garuntee that they’ll have any left for you.“ “I never thought of that way when I saw the restock sign...” “Most people don’t, in fact most people don’t care about the quality of the food long as it’s good and edible. So like I said limited supply, right? Well, right now I have tons of food to sell, I won’t be running out either,” Jaune said with a smirk, “but for how long? Anyway, another problem if your foods coming from outside the kingdom means that it’s coming outside the kingdom, this is two probelm. One, you’re weakening the local market, while strengthening foreign market, and you don’t want freaking Vacuo to be stronger than Vale in anyway right?” Jaune asked slyly.

“No..”

“The other problems with outsourcing from out of kingdom, is the shorter shelf lift, shipping takes time, you know this, you’re smart guys right?”Jaune asked the men, who quickly nodded. “Well, you should know that caravans only come so often, there could be month in-between you ordering your product and actually getting it! So your food could be moldy and black!”

The suits looked at each other, remembering the bosses fits of rage about a ruined order of fruit, and their own bad experiences with outsourcing. Conveinently forgeting this only happened once or twice, out of the hundreds of times they’ve ordered.

Jaune continued, “The final problem is it’s outside the kingdom anything can happen! Bandits, grimm, White Fang, Then Bam!” Jaune punctuating by slamming his hand against the crate. “You just lost three hundred lien by ordering from freaking Vacuo, what the hell you’d expect from ordering from those them, it’s all gone now! And it’s all your fault from ordering from Vacuo!” Jaune said quickly, and almost out of breath.

The men scowled at the idea of letting Vacuo pull a fast one on proud Valemen like themselves.

“Now, on the other hand my produce is loved and cared for only a mere half hour away in hunter protected settlement of Stardew Valley. Barring in-climate weather, or Grimm, I will have your product, if it’s ready for shipping out, to you within a week or you get the shipping free! Bam!” Jaune slammed his hand on the box again. “You just cut your grocery bill by a two-thirds!”

Silence then filled the gap again.

“So, did I answer you gentlemen’s questions?” Jaune asked with a slightly sore throat.

“I think I’ll be taking a look at your scrollsite later today,” The second suit said, then smiles thinly. “I just hope you’re not exaggerating, but regardless you got me rethinking my spending habits!”

The men and boy let out a little chuckle.

“Alright how about I let you two see what it’s in the crate to see proof of product.” Jaune said easing the crate on two the ground, easily being twice as wide as his waist, and coming up to his torso.

The men gave a shrug.

Jaune undid the latch on the crate and opened it up, assulting the men with sweet, starchy, and delcious smells of produce, their mouths involuntarily starting to water at the sight of fresh cherries, ripe melons, golden-yellow corn, full and juicy blackberries, tart and sweet blueberries, the spicy red hot peppers, ripe to bursting tomatos, and the most robust coffee they’ve ever smelt.

Jaune then slammed the lid closed a minute later, and put the crate onto his shoulder.

“Arc! What are you doing here? I told you to meet me at noon, and I’d meet you at the Club, not for you to wait for me outside the Club for an hour.”

“Dad say “If you’re early you’re on time, if you’re on time you’re late, if you’re late, everybody’s dead and you’ve lost your huntsman license.”

“Whatever, just follow me in, and we’ll hash out the deal today.” Junior looked at his men. “I’m not mad, you did well.”

“I’m not mad either, just bored.” Jaune said slipping in.

.....

“So, you wanna go half in, on a order?” “Why not? All that talking got me hungry.”

#Jaune Arc #Farmer Jaune AU #I have no idea about economics #I just typed what ever to feel smart #I have no regrets.#Junior #Stardew Valley

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ziracona · 4 years

Note

Do you have any tips for people who want to start writing? Specifically dialogue or how to research thoroughly?

Sure! For starting writing in general, the best advice to start with is look at the stories you yourself love, and identify what you love most in them. Relationships of a certain kind, high-stakes fight scenes, murder mysteries and scenes where people have to choose under pressure who they’re going to trust, redemption arcs, someone ending up adopting a child more or less because the kid has no one else to look after them? If there are scenarios you daydream about writing stories in your head, what are the common themes? No matter how oddly specific that gets or how often or scarcely you see it in fiction, I garuntee you you’re not the only one who likes it, and it’s good to base writing ideas around whatever you want to see more of yourself. You’ll be happy writing it, and the other people who yearn for it too, once they find you, will be very happy to see some as well! For me, I’ve always really enjoyed stories where someone who has no connection to the action ends up choosing to do the right thing and gets pulled into dangerous scenarios, found family, hope punk, and scenes where someone is injured/sick/drugged/unconscious/trapped and ends up at the mercy of someone they expect to hurt them, but who chooses to do absolutely nothing bad to them and saves/helps/looks after them instead (to name a few of many, many faves, haha). Some of those are pretty broad and some are wildly specific, but I love writing them all, and I’m not the only person who enjoys reading them either, so it’s a great kind of springboard to work with. : ) —Ok, for the specific questions though—I’ll do them in two parts to go with the two questions.

For writing dialogue, the biggest thing is to establish distinctive voices for all your cast. That sounds a lot harder than it is. The first real step is just to have some idea who they are as a person. Now, I know you probably don’t have time to be Bleach and have a sidebar backstory that goes for eleven pages about every guard who gets knocked out (and tbh I wouldn’t recommend it either haha), but don’t worry—you don’t need to. A lot of the time, I know very little about characters who aren’t primary cast when I write them first, and only during writing really get to know them either. Think of it a little as improv acting. If you ever have like, done bits with your friends, you actually know how to do this whether you’ve acted a day in your life or not. Friend greeting you on the phone with a fake accent & pretending to be an interviewer & you responding in kind & being like “Well yes, in my best selling novel How to Kill your Ex-Boss” and just running with it totally counts. You have no idea who the person you’re pretending to be is. You don’t know their favorite food or where they went to school. But you do know what they’re going to say next, because you’ve tapped into the person you’re running, and that’s the only thing you need to know. Same if you have ever given yourself fake interviews in your head. You’re playing both interviewer, fiction self (for whom you are for SURE making up details on the fly) & anyone else involved in that scene simultaneously. Writing can be pretty similar. Now, I do this to a bigger extent then most people, because I method-write (which uhhhh, I cant completely recommend, as it is devestating on the emotions :’-] ), but it works used less extremely too.

The idea, really, is to give characters a voice in your head, and have that voice not be the same for any two characters. And I mean voice literally. What do they sound like. Do they talk fast, get excited & into topics easily? Always sound mildly done with everyone else? If it helps, pick the voice of an actor or a friend or different tones you can use yourself speaking outloud—just give them voices. A lot of it will start flowing pretty naturally once the character is created. Writing has a lot of overlap with acting, in that you really need to grasp and be able to kind of jump around in a lot of different types of peoples’ heads. Most people have significantly different ways of speaking, even if they don’t have different accents than your other characters. Some people cuss more, some never do, you get varried vocabulary sizes, and just word choice and tone. I’m probably making this sound a little hard and overwhelming, but trust me, it’s not so bad. Mostly it will come naturally once you get a mental idea of what your character is like, sounds like, and the vibes they give off.

From a more technical standpoint, a couple of really good suggestions are to run dialogue in your head before writing it, and to read your written dialogue out loud. No matter how well you write, you will think dialogue better most of the time. This is just how it goes, because writing is a different process. So something that helps is to mentally “play” a scene out, and jot down some of the dialogue as you hear it, or to pause in writing to run some of the scene mentally, then pick back up again. Another big one is that almost all people, when writing dialogue, will start out writing too formally. Now, that’s totally fine if your character actually just speaks very formally, but most people 80% of the time speak using contractions. Like, you’d probably say, “Hey! How’re you doing? It’s been a while, hasn’t it?” and not “Hey! How are you doing? It has been a while, has it not?” (And obviously, most people aren’t going to actually write out “has it not,” but simpler ones like “How are” vs “How’re” or “It is” vs “It’s” are super common to write. Try to keep that in mind writing dialogue, and also try reading your dialogue out loud verbatim. A lot of the time, something will read totally normal to you, but the second you hear it out loud, you’ll go “Oh. Oh, no. No one speaks like this.” It is SUPER helpful, and kind of funny too. Also, don’t be afraid to use verbal interrupters like “Uh” or “Uhm” or substitues for them like “Well” and “Like” —people use ‘em when they speak. We also tend to interrupt our friends to agree when talking about stuff, because the way language is set up a lot of the time you know the end of a sentence before it is said.

Other things that govern how characters speak a lot are their comfort level in a scene and what they want, how open or closed off they are about themselves in general, and their personal ways of thinking in general. For example, Joey Harmin and Quentin Smith are extremely fun to write in scenes together for me, because they both follow fairly understandable and clear logical thought paths, but those paths are completely different. Like they could not be operating on less similar wavelengths half the time, which is hilarious. There’s an exchange I haven’t uploaded for New Dawn Fades where they’re talking for the first time, and Joey is operating nearly 100% on small-picture context (But since you woke up, I have been very nice to you. Why don’t you trust me?) and Quentin is operating at nearly 100% big-picture context (You have killed me before—I have literally no reason to think you won’t any second now once again. I have no idea why you have not already). And both thought lines make total sense for the character to be following, but they could not be more confused by each others’ response. People think super weirdly and super different from each other, and that’s amazing, and some times you legit wont totally get what wild shit your own character is on, but that’s fine. You don’t need to—you just need to know it makes sense to them, and be able to understand it on some logic level, even if you could never really get it emotionally or more really than ‘in theory’ on a personal level. Also, side note—sometimes people speak super differently when in a professional setting vs relaxed, or with different friends, and that’s totally fine. Also-also, you might notice that if some characters spend a lot of time together, they start to speak similarly—that’s super normal too—don’t worry. It’s not you doing a bad job. Friends tend to pick up each others’ mannerisms and speech to some extent, and this is wildly more apparent when they hang out together.

This was a very long and in-depth answer to writing dialogue, but really, don’t let it overwhelm you. The TLDR is more or less just give them different voices in your head, and listen to them, then write down what you hear. Read it out loud to make sure it sounds like them if you feel unsure about it. I personally get into character and try to really think as/become them a bit at least when writing, because I approach writing from a very acting-based standpoint becuase that’s just how I am wired, but even if that’s not how you vibe, just know them a little. Know once you’ve talked to someone for like, three minutes, you have some idea how they talk. The synonym they’d chose, if they’d agree, or disagree, or just give a judgy look, or stay quiet. Know them that well, and try to hear them in your head. Read everything you write for them in that voice, thinking that voice well you write, and it’ll do wonders.

Now, for research.

First up, research is FUN! It’s amazing. It’s so wild to learn things and dip into thousands of parts of human existence you had no idea about at all. Try to think of it as a plus, not a pain, because really, it should be. Now, to be fair, I lean heavy into research—I’ll do days of research to try to find something out if I have to, and I have. I’m learning some of how to write and conjugate an extremely dead language right now for a fanfic, I’ve done massive deep dives from everything to ancient cultures and religions, screen shotting films to zoom in on set detail to learn what artist or band a character is into, what they drink, what they own, to the appproximate timing from specific streets in New York I’ve never seen to each other by specific subway line, to a myriad of wounds and diseases, to mental illness, to historical events as insignificant as marsh draining in specific cities. But bro? It was fun. Sometimes it’s a lot, but the thrill of finding what you were looking for? It’s great.

Now, I’m not saying you need to be me if you don’t want to haha. But when it comes to researching whatever you want to research, here’s some tips: First up, if what you are researching has anything to do with a human experience? (Mental illness, physical illness or injury, sex, birthing, death, how it feels to shoot a gun, or fall from a great height, or have a PTSD episode, anything like that?) You really need to hear it from people, if at all possible. The good news? In this day and age? It super is, almost always! Even with death. You can find people describing death (body death, not complete brain death) experiences they went through, and it’s very cool. I definitely recommend discussion threads, like Reddit, and YouTube videos of people giving their personal accounts for this kind of thing. They’re amazing resources, and also usually surprisingly fast! This is especially important for stuff like neurodivergence, disorders, mental illness, drug experiences, or anything else that’s on a cognitive more than physical level, because if you look at just textbook explanations, they’re not only usually very incomplete, but sometimes even inaccurate. Listening to people can give the truth if it’s missing, and the majority of the time while that’s not the biggest issue—especially concerning like, wounds or freezing or a near drowning experience, etc—it gives it a completeness a medical account just can’t. Also, if you have got any personal experience to lean on? Go for it! I’ve never been electrocuted horribly really, but when researching for the torture sequence in Proven, I both looked up a ton of first-hand accounts and some science to better understand what was going on, and took my own experience of the electric shocks I have gotten as the first building block in making a mental picture of what it would feel like to go through that. Obviously, being shocked hard enough to be flung backwards from a cattle fence (my history) is a far cry from being subjected to parrilla torture, but having a small amount of basic knowledge of the kind of pain electricity causes was useful as a first block in translating the information I was reading into something I understood better.

For non human-experience based research, a lot of it is pretty easy to look up, even if you wouldn’t think so. For example, guessing at the time period for cars in Autohaven and searching different years + truck + brand names for American cars was actually a really short process for finding a match—same with the make of the metal gas cans, back when I was trying to determine when, exactly, Philip was from. Visual image searches are great when applicable, especially if you’re trying to figure out what something is, because chances are if you describe a plant you saw once as ‘Tall lake reed plant with hotdog bun looking top,’ someone else will have once used some of those words when searching for a cattail as well. Also, for non-human research, books and academic papers are great, but so are non-academic sources like videos and photos for locations or objects. Sometimes again though, human info will honestly be where it is at, like reading firsthand descriptions of specific places. For most things, just type what you’re looking for into a search engine honestly and start there. You can totally start on the Wikipedia page for a city or a Greek god or a type of bomb, and move on from there—people put references in wiki articles, and you can check the bottom of the page for the specific source too. You can go on from basic knowledge to add or subtract keywords and refine your search. It’s pretty simple once you get going. If you’re getting extraneous results because a film title shares the name of what you are looking for, or a song or whatever, try quotation marks for an exact match, or - and then quotation marks around what you see that you want gone from results. Pretty basic stuff. Tbh, a lot of the time, it’s all you’re gonna need. Want to write a Stranger Things fic, but you have no idea what movies or shows were popular in the US at the time and need to know what they’d be watching in a scene? Honestly, searching “1980s (or 1980whatever-more-specific year) popular shows” will probably get you what you need in like 4 minutes. Also, if you’ve got a parent who was alive at the time and lived in the place, or older friend (or younger, I don’t know you, maybe this one doesn’t apply to you because YOU were there, but you’d have to ask a teenager irl now what the kids are into for a 20teens story, haha), utilize that resource and just ask them. Discussion spaces again, a massively useful resource. You can find people talking about their shared experiences with almost anything, and hear it more or less first-hand.

If you’re trying to learn about culture or history, again, first-person accounts are where it’s at. If you can’t find any, go for the next best thing, which is descendants or historians with a personal connection/interest. If you really, really can’t find much of that (as sadly has been the case for some cultures or religions I’ve researched in past, considering the lack of documentation period and/or intentional culture erasure going on), then read what you do find on it with a grain of salt. Who wrote it, and when? What biases did they bring? Also, often an old document like that might be the only first source you can find, but taking whatever badly documented info they have and trying new searches with the specific language you learned from them can yield new and much better results. Just do your level best. ^u^ Really, that’s all anyone can do. Sometimes there will be things without much out there period, and you don’t have to like, put 97 hours of research in combing your local library for any thing you may have missed for the fic you’re on right now or something. Just do your best, do what you can, and care, and you’ll be okay. It can seem daunting, but doing your sincere best is what anyone who does know the answer—living or dead—would care about, and it’s an important thing /to/ do, and also a pretty informative and fun one. Also, I swear it’s not as intimidating as I might make it seem. Pretty much always you’ll be able to find some decent chunks of solid and very useful information eventually, on anything. And most things actually do not at all take that long to research. I’m a monster, who likes to down research more and more each morning like I’m building up a resistance to iocaine powder to someday win a battle of wits, but you really don’t have to be me, and if you want to be, chances are that means you also just really heckin love learning new facts, so you’re gonna love the wild deep insanity of creating It’s Always Sunny Meme level conspiracy walls trying to track down ancient evil trees in mythology to figure out what in the goddamn the Entity really IS and you’ll adore it all. If you’re not, trust me—that’s completely fine. Most research is gonna take between 20 minutes and a few hours, depending on the level of complexity, and once you learn it, you have all this cool new knowledge! Like that you can fake a death with tetrodotoxin so well someone with a high but not fatal does in them could die undergoing an autopsy! Or how much opium kills someone, how it actually feels to black out, how hard it actually is to chloroform someone, or that wolves have been known to hold funerals for loved ones, or how to stitch a wound. It’s like, amazing. Join me, and become that thing from Adventure Time going “I have approximate knowledge of many things” while rubbing its grimy hands together with glee.

Uhhh haha, I made this one more concise wildly, but the TLDR version is just ask people or read or watch what people who have undergone X thing say it is like (oh, and make sure to read more than one account—big one with accuracy). For non-human research, start with just a basic search. If you’re a student and have access to academic searches more easily, totally use that. If not, don’t worry. Lots of academic search compilation sites are still open to you, and honestly, you’re only going to need to turn academic for highly specific and wildly rare information period. Most of the time, hear it from people who know the answer. Discussion forums and YouTube journal-type videos are fantastic resources. For what living in rural Wisconsin in the early 1980s was like for Philip, I searched about living in the early 1980s in rurual Wisconsin, found specific names in an article for the kinds of cheap apartments common, adjusted my search, and found a ton of good resources by people documenting the struggles and mistreatment of life there at the time, and also found out Milwaukee is surprisingly one of the most dangerous and racist cities in America, then and now, on the way. For Kate experiencing being forced to drink bleach, I watched seven different people on YouTube talk about their experiences drinking bleach, and read up on the medical side to understand the science of what happens to you, plus a few text descriptions as well. But really, both of those were pretty fun and fascinating and quick research stints. Most are. I super recommend trying some deepish dives out, even just for fun and not with writing planned in mind at all!

Anyway, I hope this helps! I wrote it at one in the morning & didn’t proof because I feel very bad and need to pass out to try and heal, so sorry if there are any errors that make this hard to read. Thanks for asking! This was fun to answer. Please feel free to ask any follow-ups if there’s something I didn’t seem to cover, or you want to know more about either of these or something else. I’m certainly not the world’s leading expert or something, but I got some fun methods and tips I’ve developed over the years I’m happy to share with a fellow writer (or bored or curious person just interested in the process, haha). Again, I gave long answers because I wanted to be thorough, but I promise neither dialogue nor research is a difficulty level reflected in the length of those answers—that’s just me being me. Don’t let it intimidate you! They’re both fun and actually not so hard things to do. You just kind of need to learn your starting off points and get your sea legs, and the rest mostly comes naturally and easily and is very fun. It’s super satisfying to read a line and be like “Only you, my dumb child” seeing the stupid crap they say, or “You’ve come so far” watching how they’re choosing to reach out to someone now vs as the story’s start; or to have needed a way to have a character pry open a wedged car door and find just exactly the perfect tool you could even have a logical reason for them to easily find in the scene and be able to sit back down thinking YES!!! I got it!! —it’s a rush, and very, very satisfying. I’m sure you can do it!! And I wish you the best of luck. I sadly made this on mobile because I forgot tumblr sucks and won’t let me retroactively add read mores on mobile now and it’s too late for me to change that, and I’m so sorry this is so long 😭😭😭, but I’m tagging it “long post” so hopefully tag blocks can still save people :’-] — anyway! Hope this helps and best of luck. Night! 💙

#ask #anonymous #writing #writing advice #long post

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vitiateoriginator · 3 years

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Work Rant Time:

So now that Im out of the company, I have no fears about talking trash about it over the internet. For those who didn't know, didn't guess, or just didn't care to know, I worked at Dollar General. Today I walked up to the other keyholder on duty, told her "I can't do this anymore, I quit" and then walked out.

The tl;dr is that Dollar General a very bad place to work for long term, but good if you're just getting your feet wet or if you're trying to get by for a short while.

Longer rant below the cut

So, a little bit of history to start off: I started working at Dollar General in March 2020, a week after my old job, A.C. Moore, closed for good (it was already going out of business but the pandemic got it to shut down even faster. rip ac moore I miss you). I should have taken it as a warning sign when I was hired over the phone within a half hour of applying. I wasn't even interviewed, just told I sounded nice and to come in with my ID and SS card on Monday. But being recently unemployed for the first time in almost 3 years I was desperate. However, I didn't expect to stay as long as I did.

On my first day, I was trained alongside 2 people who would be transferred with me to another store. Turns out they were meant to be my boss and her assistant manager. The assistant was fired within the first week.

A month later, I put in a 2 weeks notice. The girl hired as my manager not only had no retail experience (including being absolute trash to the customers) but she was also cutting my hours down to just 4 a week. All because I got a second job due to the minimal pay they were giving me at Dollar General. So I decided I didn't need to stay. During what was supposed to be my last few days, the store's district manager came and cornered me in an aisle with no cameras interrogating me about why I was quitting. I told her I just didn't feel satisfied there. She offered me $10/h to stay, but I still refused. The next day my manager went on a "2 week anxiety leave" only to never return. My hours were increased, I was given a raise. And so, I stayed.

The new manager was the assistant manager who'd taken over once the original was fired. She'd already been working at the company for 6 months before and had been picking up our old manager's slack since her promotion. She was a good boss, firm but fair, and I liked talking with her. But under the pressure of the company she'd give everyone a bigger workload than could be handled in a day. I've got nothing against my boss, she's a good person and I hate hurting her by quitting as we were work friends up until now, but sometimes she could be a little uncaring

As for the work itself it wasn't hard. Cashier most of the time, then stock and recover shelves when it's not busy. But the company has strict protocols to follow. 1 rolltainer every hour you work, even if there's a lot of small pieces on it or if you're on the register that day. Totes have to be done in 6 days from delivery, even if there's a hundred or more.

You get more work put on you if you're a keyholder or the assistant manager. That's to be expected, of course, but the amount of pressure put on you along with it is ridiculous. I didn't want the responsibility. But my boss eventually convinced me to be a keyholder in November. I hated it and gave back the keys a month later. 3 months after I was re-promoted, and stayed that way because I knew I knew more than everyone else on the team, having been there the longest and for some reason the most responsible person working at my location. Another month later after much convincing my boss got me to accept a promotion to assist manager. I hated it. I know that I had more experience than everyone else. I know that made me most qualified. And it wasn't too different from what I had to do as a keyholder. But the constant knowledge that one day I'd be shipped off to become the boss of my own store freaked me out. Nobody really listens to me when I talk or give orders. Even if I could handle the work myself, anyone below me would never listen to my instructions. Not only that, but the way everything is run just sucks

Everything breaks or freezes all the time. The store's registers are the same ones they used in the 90's. You literally have to use a set of keys to do voids, returns, and to get the till out of the drawer. If a register or pinpad breaks you send it back to the company and they send you another one which is just a once broken computer that's been fixed up again, still as ancient as the one before. Or if it's possible to fix quickly, you have to sit in the phone with Dollar General tech support (aka the ERC) for 2 hours while they tell you to turn the computer off and on again. The store's main computer in the back is constantly freezing. The stores trackers (called the HHT) are slow as hell and freeze up or even shut off at random especially when needed the most. Truck deliveries, although scheduled for specific days, come at random. And then there'd be no garuntee that it would be unloaded into the store properly by the driver. Vendors like Coke and Pepsi are unreliable so fighting with them to come unpack the crap they delivered was always a hassle. And on top of all that, you get pressure from the district manager to be faster and do better than you already are. Even with all these problems which the company refuses to fix

Some other nitpicky crap I'd like to mention: DG doesn't take taxes from your paycheck (or if they do its a small amount). This year when I got my income tax, I only got $100 back despite working 3 different jobs in 2020. And then I still owed the government $2 somehow. This also happened to a coworker, who owed the government $300 at income tax time, despite only being 18 and DG being her first job ever. Also, Dollar General doesn't give annual raises, however it is very quick to promote people. But once a person is promoted DG puts an incredible amount of pressure onto them, causing workers to quit before the company has to pay a good wage for too long. Tbh I'm extremely surprised I lasted as long as I did.

So all of those factors are what caused me to quit. That, and since I was made assistant manager, I've only had 1 day a week off, during 45 hour work weeks. I'm just so tired at this point. Frustrated. Unfulfilled. I feel a little guilty for quitting without notice. But overall I feel freed. I'll find a better job one day soon. For now, at least, Im gonna take some much needed R&R.

I'm sure nobody cares about any of this. But I decided to share for those who might have considered Dollar General as a job option. And also as a reminder to my future self of where I've come from and how much I've gone through in the past

#sam's rants about life #dollar general

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chrysanthemumpink · 6 years

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When I first started taking the first steps to grad school and beginning my career, I was really nervous because as an English major and wannabe academic I was afraid of the horror stories of people with masters working as waiters and people with doctorates being stuck in adjunct limbo. My advisors did a really good job of telling me how terrible the employment rates were. Do you have any idea what it feels like to want to be a professor, only to have actual professors say “that may not be a good idea?”

I started doubting my career prospects and wondering what I should do with my life if what I really wanted wasn’t sustainable. Then I talked to my engineering friend and he said “geez the job market is shit, I hope I can I find a job.”

I talked to my friend who wants to be an architect, “I have dreams but I don’t know if they are reasonable.”

I talked to my neighbor who just graduated from law school, “I’m living with my parents because I want to get a head start on student loans. Im working an entry level position but I’m still a cashier at Kroger. I need the cash.”

And literally almost every millennial is suffering ?. It’s shocking but almost everyone I know is having the same pre-career identity crisis. Future engineers, lawyers, doctors, dancers, writers...they all have anxiety about career prospects. It took me a long time to get in this mindset but I’m ready to just say fuck it. Every road I take is going to be long and tough. So it doesn’t matter what I choose to do or be, there’s gonna be difficulty, esp in this economy. So why not just suffer for what I want to do or be instead of just settling. There is no safety career or garunteed route to success . The millennial engineers are no better off than the millennial liberal arts so why not do what makes you happy ?

#studyblr

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fymeetrasurik · 7 years

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Star Wars: Screaming Citadel Roundup

So I just finished the event, and I got to say I was not prepared for the decent helping of feels I was just handed. Like I was excited for this thing sense they announced it. Star wars meets gothic horror? Yes please and may I have some more. So if you want the short and sweet version of an opinion, was good, read it.

Now for the long version. To me this was a great event comic, or crossover however you look at it, and I wish more comics of this nature took a page from it. Cause at the end of the day, this was about character. About interactions between them and even a nice helping of growth for some of them. It just has a crazy vampire queen in a screaming castle surrounded by space bugs as the background. And actually, because of this, there’s really one thing I want to focus on in talking about the series. And that’s Aphra and Luke which are really like the heart of the story. But quickly, I’ll just mention a few things I really dug besides them, cause it’s worth mentioning.

I really dug the queen. I love villains, in fact probably too much. And what I always do, is wonder and come up with backstories as to why they are the way they are, and that sort of thing cause i’m a sucker for history and character. Now in star wars, i don’t have to do that that often. Cause every single villain has like an entire catalog of backstory and history to them. But with the queen here, I really would like to have learned more about her. How she found the bugs, how she first took control of the planet. Just details give me details. Doubt we’ll ever get those, so I’ll say she was a fine vamp antagonist. Threatening, sadistic, and finding giddy joy in it. I especially loved the weird kind of ethereal they were doing with her. How smoke and mist would always trail from her, and she would vanish into it. Classic vampire, but the art depicted it as more tech based as the mist would almost pixelate around her. Thought that was an interesting touch.

I also loved her confrontation with Luke, and Luke’s inner strength he finds. I liked the fight cause it was just a psychic battle so to an onlooker they were just intensely staring at each other. And I like that Luke found his own strength rather than submitting to the bug or to the ancient Jedi’s words. It’s a good lesson for him in the force.

Loved that Leia got to knock around a mind controlled Han. That’s just perfect for them lol.

And oh my god beetee and triple zero are just delights. Like I can see how they’d get on other peoples nerves, but for me they just hit the sweet spot, and I grin with every line they have. Okay now onto the main course.

I wanna talk about Luke and Aphra, cause they’re interactions and growth are at the core of this story. I already talked about loving their dynamic when i talked about the first issue, how it was like a wolf leading a sheep she was cool with and it was adorable. That dynamic sort of continues into the series, only it’s gets more close and friendly as it goes, which I love.

When he stops Sana from shooting her, that was my first bag of feels. And I wanna use this moment to talk about the art. I really think they do a good job with expressions, especially on Aphra and Luke, you can tell what they’re feeling and really understand why just through the expression. But yeah, Luke is such a awesome, and lovable guy. Like at this point he knows she’s kind of led him into a mess, but still he’s going to protect her because that’s just who he is, and he’s already formed an attachment to her, almost like he has with Han or Leia. A sort of adopted family sort of thing. And on Aphra’s end I especially love this cause i garuntee this was the first time anyone had ever protected her just because they cared. Then he feels kept on coming. I will say analysis of this is easy cause the comic mostly does it for me. Put it pointed something out i hadn’t thought of.

Luke and Aphra are kind of two sides of a coin. They both come from very similar places. Aphra lost her mother in the clone wars, and we all know the barbecue the empire threw at Luke’s place. They both start relating to each other in a very personal way. And the talk they have allows you to see the different perspectives of the people in the empire. Aphra says, “Son’t be naive. The empire’s not for people like us. I don’t need anyone and you’re a basically nearly bursting balloon of the force loves me! the force loves me! But for normal people? For them pretty much any peace is better than war.” This feeds into the trend going on in the series of kind of humanizing the empire and I love it. This was what surprised me the most about the comic cause I didn’t expect this link between them to form. It developing to the point where Luke flat out calls Aphra his friend hurt my soul, cause again Luke is just the best, and Aphra probably never had anyone say that about her either. But then Aphra is Aphra, and she pulls a double cross. But her relationship with Luke has effected her. “He’s dumb, naive... and everything I’m not” In a way, I’d say this was mostly Aphra’s story. She learns the most, grows the most, and with the activation of her crystal she gains the most. But at the same time, she realizes I think how much she doesn’t have.

Like her and Sana were a thing. And it apparently ended bad enough for Sana to try to shoot her on sight. Aphra seeing Luke Han and Leia, and Sana and seeing what they all have. I think that effects her. She says she doesn’t need anyone, and she probably believes that, but seeing the gang makes her possibly wonder what life could have been like is she did have someone, anyone who she trusted and whom trusted her in return.This leads into the resolution which hurt my feels the most. So Aphra pulled a double cross on Luke, and for once again one of the first times, she felt guilt enough to go back for him. But all the connection she built up with Luke was gone. Since she led them into this, and tried to walk away, Luke realized she was just using him. And so he tells her to stay the hell away from him and his friends. I think this is a very good character relationship turn, cause usually when something like this happens it’s a mistake or misunderstanding and you know it’ll be resolved. But here, Aphra genuinely was completely in the wrong, and made terrible mistakes and decisions. She did start this out, just planning on using and discarding Luke. Aphra isn’t a good person. Yet. And so the two part, and maybe they never will reconcile. It’s tragic but makes total sense given who both characters are. I love the last scene with Aphra on her ship. Again analysis is easy cause triple zero outright says the theme. “He went through an experience just as traumatic as yours and remains a positive delightful person devoted to a better existence for all sentient life. And you realize how special he is too late to retain his respect. That must be an awful reminder of your own failings of character.” Lol thanks comic, though he is a droid so being blatant is kind of they’re thing. But yeah, Aphra walks away from all this technically haven gotten what she wants. But how must that eat away at her? That here’s this guy whose really just the best, most optimistic and trusting person in the galaxy, and she was such trash that she managed to make even him turn his back on her. That’s the kind of things that makes you reevaluate a few things. And reading this scene, I am so excited and interested to see how her character progresses. I have an idea, but it’s basically my same idea with every character who, because they’re in this timeline of star wars, has to either die or leave the story entirely but I’ll leave that for another day. But in truth, in star wars right now, I think i’m more excited to see how her story goes than I am with the movies. Don’t worry I’m sure that’ll change as we get closer to Last Jedi. Focused a lot on Aphra in this recap but the story kind of does too.

So all in all, this was a darn good read. Especially if the premise of horror in star wars interests you. But honestly I’d say the fans who would get the most out of this are Luke and Aphra fans. If you are into either character, I’d say this is almost a must read. This was one of my favorite crossovers in the new canon and I can’t wait to see where the comics go next!

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littlefirefox · 7 years

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Why I ship the shit I ship

So,I know that shipping in general is a fangirl’s main thing.Basically,it’stwo people or characters that have a chemistry, fanon or canon that makes you super happy and giggly. I know that shipping characters is usually fine,because they aren’t real people, though people do fight over differnet characters.Then, there is shipping real people in the real world. I understand why morals are questioned, but if it does not directly affect you, then don’t bother. I realize that it’s hard to avoid people who ship IRL people, but that does not give you permission to be an asshole.

Fandom communities are wide, broad and very diverse. You have artists, writers, bloggers, people who do all three, people who spectate, newbies, veterans and crack shippers along with many variations. It’s designed that way so that everyone feels like they have a place in a community. Fandoms are a great way to meet new people, observe writings from young writers and look at incredible art from all kinds of sources. So, why should a ship ruin your time.

I have many ships,as I’ve been in many differnt fandoms. Some, I stayed in a little but left, due to a new interest. Others, I am still in because I am so involved in the fandom or that I can’t get enough of it. Some fandoms I was in or currently are in right now, are: Thomas Sanders, Jacksepticeye, Crankgameplays, Markiplier, Teamiplier, Hetalia, Free!, Attack on Titan, Harry Potter, Supernatural,Sherlock, Doctor Who and at one point, Twilight. As you can see, almost all of them contain real people, whether actors or not. I know for a fact! that YouTube especially, is kinda new in the whole Fandom thing, as it can be hard to create and maintain a captive audiance and keep that audiance to create a fandom around that. But,with it’s growing popularity, YouTube fandoms are growing bigger. And with bigger fandoms, come shipping fangirls.

C’mon though, there are a lot of collabs and there are quite a few that make you smile, because there is a chemistry between the people. Little chemistries that blossom into amazinga nd pure friendships. These friendships lead to meeting IRL and collabing together in the same location. (I’m mainly talking about gaming channels here). Fangirls love a good chemistry, and they are pretty fricking good at finding a quality chemistry and blowing it out of the water. Soon, there’ll be fanart, fanfictions and posts about these encounters, ranging from fluff, to angst to smut and lemons. We all know it happens, so deal with it.

Then, come the realists, who start bashing ships with facts. “They aren’t gay”, “They have girlfriends” and “Why are you writing abotu REAL people??” So what?! It’s make believe and for fun anyways! FanFICTION! Fiction is not real / parallel universes, where this stuff can become a reality. Trust me, we know it’s not real. That doesn’t mean we can’t dream and create universes to make it real.

But, that is not what this is about. You all probably know this, since I’m writing this on Tumblr. This is about my ships (which I will list a majority of them) and then I will (try) to explain why I ship it the way I do without a lot of words.

My ships include the following:

YOUTUBE:

Phan (YT) This ship is one of the most famous, but I don’t ship it as most do. I view this glorious ships as the cutuest and purest brotp ever. I’m talking plaonic I love you’s, forehead kisses and hand holding. This ship for me is fluff! Because they’ve known each other for a long time, I don’t doubt they tried dating, but I can’t see it working out. I feel with their bond, it’d be awkward for them, so they break up, and just stay as incredibly close friends.

Jelix (YT) A semi-rare pair of YouTubers jacksepticeye and Pewdiepie. This is also just an incredible brotp for me. Any collabs they do are super fun and engaging and they almost seem like brothers. The playful fighting and insults remind me of a brotherly feel to their relationship. I know that Jack is dating Signe and she is an incredibly badass girl with killer style, and I ship Septishu so hard! They are absolutely adorable together!!

Septishu (YT / IRL ) Oh. My. God! I can’t even begin to explain this ship. It’s super cute and super canon! Wiishu is an INCREDIBLE person, with the gall to keep up with the loud tennis ball that is Jack / Sean. She has an amazing sense of style and her make-up is always gorgeous. How can ANYONE hate this incredibly adorable Danish badass?! Plus, she has her own YouTube! Any videos she does with Jack are incredibly cute and sweet.

Tythan (YT) This one will garuntee get me in trouble... Tythan. Oh, the newest (kinda) ship of Ethan from Crankgameplays and Tyler from Teamiplier. Two guys who (maybe?) live(d) together and appear quite frequently on Markiplier’s channel. But, there is a chemistry between the adorable Baby Boy Blue and Stone-Face Tyler. With subtle glances, a couple hovering incidents and a bunch of adorable interactions, how can you not like these two boys. They botha re incredible and sweet people who just wanna spread kindness. How I ship this,I still don’t know. It’s mixture of lovey-dovey romance with platonic friends who just get along great! I just like seeing my bois together!

Crankiplier- A weird pair, but I like the weird ones. Basically, it’s just Mark and Ethan as their current relationship is. They get along great and Mark has said that Ethan impresses him, with his perservearance of not giving up on his YouTube channel. Plus, thei have great laughs together and their collabs are hilarious!

Cranksepticeye- Another odd-ball. I don’t know why I like this pair. It’s just, fitting? Both loud bois with colored hair with a dedication to making their fans happy. Plus, they have somewhat similar mannerisms, like constantly brushing hair out of their eyes, and their loud and hyperactive personalities, along with steadfast morals. To me, it’s a mirroring thing and besides, my bois are precious.

Septiplier-No, THIS one will definitelly get me in trouble... Okay, this originally wasn’t going to be on here, but I ship this. Now, before you get your panties in a twist, let me explain this. I love the friendship of Mark and Jack. The banter and the playful jabs are so funny. They have girlfriends and I only ship them as friends. Much like Tythan. The dynamic chemistry between them, plus the banter, their Prop Hunt videos and general collab videos are hilarious. I did ship it romantically at one point, but not the smutty lemons and that. Eck. I like pure things with dynamic characters that have great chemistry. Septiplier is dead, but their friendship lives on in my heart, because to me, that’s all they ever would be.

HETALIA: I should say this. All of these ships are based around Fanon only, as I’m not a fan of the show itself. I really love the fanon universe that’s been created.

RusAme- Shut up. I like a good, conflicting pair! A lot of good angst, and headcanons. These two are such a power couple.

FrUK- SIBLINGS!! I don’t ship this romantic. Their pasts are too deep and troubled for them to be romatically in love in my book.

USUK- SIBLINGS!! See FrUK for the explanation.

Spamano: A fiesty Italian matched with a lovey-dovey Spaniard who has a great ass? Sign me up! A pair tha’s dynamically opposed, hell yeah!

GerIta- It’s canon. You can notprove it too me othewise.

ScotEng- https://www.youtube.com/user/KamisWorld94 There ya go. These two (German??) cosplayers have created these characters so beautifully that I can’t help but NOT ship them.

AmeCan- Brotherly Love. Grown up together under heavy Native American influence until the British and French came, but still raised in similar ways and are the best bros ever!

DenAme- Two hyperactive, silly adults with the enerdy of 6 year olds? Yep! Two stubborn men with morals, a love for showing strength and then silly antics? Sign me up!

PrUK- Bros. I fully believe in the Head Canon that these two were twins. yeah.

SpUK- Pirate. Days.

Awesome Trio- Beer? check. Three men with childish energy levels? check. A home alone? check. Crazy, drunken antics? Sign me up!

SANDERS SIDES: Aka the zany personalities of the amazing Thomas Snaders

Polysanders- Because I love the idea of the aspects of Thomas loving themselevs and each other.

HARRY POTTER:

Drarry- Shut up. I can’t help it! I’m a slut for contradicting characters finally resolving all their hate for love instead, finding out that being gay is okay, and that they are happier. (I’m also a slut for 8th Year Drarry. Huh! be still my beating heart!)

Harmony- Come on! These two get along like brother and sister. Hermione always worrying about Harry, Harry making sure Hermione has some fun. He usually sticks with Ron on arguments, but he does side with hermione when Ron’s being and arse. They watch out for each other, and in thd Deathly Hallows, when Ron leaves and Harry tries to cheer her up? That was super pure and I love their relationship.

Ginny X Luna- Cute lesbians both underestimated by others? YES!! Luna helps Ginny be a little more girly and Ginny helps Luna with her hexes. Ginny definitely is the protector, but Luna’s in Ravenclaw for a reason. She’s super witty, and exceptionally clever, with music. Plus, Luna and Ginny having sleepovers where they braid hair and just chatter are my achilles heel!

WolfStar- What? Come on! I love Maruaders so much! I would pay a lot of money, to have a Maruader’s universe series, written like Casting Moonshadows. That fic is a blessing on this Earth!! Plus, the YT group, Mishcief Managers have a to die for Marauder’s universe and even a killer Drarry storyline!

Notice: I am not tagging any of the people mentione din this for good reasons. Many of them have said that they do not want to be tagged in shippy stuff that’s about their friends. At least, that’s what I’m trying to prevent. I love them all, because they are all amazing people, so don’t be douchebags and tag them. (What I mean is by @ ) I will tag the various ship names, and fandoms.

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utter-randomness · 7 years

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I was tagged by the lovely @klancerous to say 5 positive things about myself publicly, so here goes:

1) I really like my hair. It’s super curly and thick and other people have complimented it before. I used to get annoyed with it because I felt it did nothing but frizz, but I’ve learned I can do a lot more with it than I thought! :) (It still usually ends up in a messy bun, but regardless...)

2) I have really nice boobs, lol. They’re super big and make it difficult to run/do jumping jacks/etc., but I’ll be damned if they don’t look awesome in a low-cut dress or shirt ;) They also make my stomach look smaller because of how big they are! XD My only regret is that Victoria’s Secret keeps a lot of their DD/DDD bras in the bottom shelves of those shelving units they have....Like, I’m top-heavy, people. There’s no garunteeing that if I go down to retrieve one of those bras that I’m coming back up lmfao!

3) I am very creative (more so than I usually give myself credit for, I think)! I may not be the best artist, but I can draw to a point that people know what it is that I have drawn and I can be proud of my art. I’ve been told I’m a good writer and I have been known to get creative with the way I talk (usually with insults/comebacks). I try to look at things from outside the box and I enjoy coming up with random headcanons or ideas about anything and everything (most of which poor @cosmosmoon is subjected to hearing at random points throughout the day lol)

4) I am musically inclined. I am no Beethoven, but I can still pick out a tune on piano, trumpet, violin, steel drum, etc. I also have a weird talent of immediately recognizing movies based on their music scores. For example: Once, my mom was in a completely different room than me watching TV. Jurassic Park started up and literally not even five seconds in I was like “IS THAT JURASSIC PARK?!” because I recognized the music (not even the main theme) that was playing and my mom was like “Wtf?”

5) I think I’m a pretty good friend. I’m far from perfect, but I’ve still got friends from Kindergarten, so I guess I must be doing something right! I have a problem with talking about myself a lot (especially if I get too excited), but I do love to listen to others and do things for people. I am someone who likes to express my appreciation/love by giving gifts, so I like to give random gifts like flowers, jewelry, or even just shitty shitty, self-written/drawn fanfic/art (poor @cosmosmoon knows this all too well....also know that more chapters are coming, Rachael ;) ). I like to make people laugh, but I also like to comfort people and help the best I can (which is usually offering a hug or food).

It’s kind of weird saying so many positive things because I feel like I’m almost bragging about myself. I don’t think this is bragging, but I feel I have trained myself to just not acknowledge these positive aspects because I’m trying to maintain some weird sense of “humility” or something. And I wonder if other people have been made to feel this way too? I know I’m far from perfect and some people may disagree with what I say I like about myself, but it does feel good to publicly acknowledge things that I like about me. Thank you again to @klancerous for tagging me and forcing me to be positive! <3 :)

Now I would like to pass on the positivity to some of you! Post 5 positive things about yourself publicly and then tag 10 of your followers to do the same! Spread the love and positive vibes! ;) <3

Tag! You’re it: @klancerous @cosmosmoon @bloggy4 @imediocre @beccccaann @mscheer0 @telgip @theoriginalsunking @the-fantabulous-satan @notalwaysyou @pastelskiesandsettereyes

If I missed anyone, I’m so sorry! I am very scatter-brained and do not take it as though I don’t like you! I ghost-tag you and would love to see you be positive about yourself and learn more about you! <3

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slampoemsiwillneverwrite · 4 years

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“Some people write letters, others make playlists; but me? I have Pinterest boards for every one of my loves. The first boy I ever fell for, my five year long roller coaster that had way more low points than highs; his was titled “it’s always gonna be you” and for a long time I thought it was. But eventually his words hurt so bad that I had to get it together and move on. I archived that board nine months ago and hadn’t used it for months before. I don’t think I’ll ever get the closure I begged for, but I don’t feel the same pain anymore. The next boy was fairly short lived, we were friends and he was nice to me and I was in such a bad place that it made sense to have feelings for the one person who ever gave me the time of day. His board was simply named “K”, and that was that. I haven’t opened that in a few years. After those two it took me a while to fall again. I had short flings and things but nothing board worthy. Then I met the boy that changed everything. He defined the idea of “right person, wrong time”, his board was called “Monday love” because that’s exactly what he was. It is full to the brim about age differences and timing and every reason that we couldn’t be together. In the end he absolutely broke me. Like into a million pieces like I didn’t know how to breathe without him. I guess an hour long car ride, five years, and a boy who couldn’t garuntee waking up in the morning doomed us from the start, but I never saw our ending coming. There is one last board and I can’t figure out my feelings on that one. His board is called “holding hands and sunshine” because eighty percent of the time he is exactly that. He makes me smile and we talk on the phone for hours on end and we go on little trips to the mountains and he is everything good. It’s just that other twenty percent that I’m not sure of. That I’m scared of. I have Pinterest boards filled with quotes and questions and art dedicated to the boys I’ve loved. I have words for each one of them that I was never brave enough to say. Maybe one day I will be.”

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stonesatglasshouses · 6 years

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What is happiness to you?

Is it a feeling? A certain aspect of your life maybe(work/family/friends etc)? Maybe you feel its only momentary, or non existent at all for you? Is it only found in a states of intense pleasure? Well if you answered with ' it's actually a state of being'(or something similar), then we have something in common and you may enjoy/appreciate this article moreso than others. If none of the above applies to you, then buckle in or quit while you're ahead cause it's going to be lengthy and you might have to have to do a bit of thinking. There is probably also some content that may be slightly uncomfortable for some individuals to hear and/or feel. Whatever the case, the ball is in your court now..

Joy is a feeling associated with a state of happiness, right? But its not the be all and end all of its definition is it? True happiness comes only when one finds contentment with their entire existence as a whole. It's not only found from experiencing the joys within it, or how 'perfect/normal' life can be. We must appreciate and learn from all aspects of life in my opinion..

Yin and yang, dark and light, good and evil, pleasure and pain, you can't have one without the other.. We may have heard it all before.. But do you still find yourself questioning wether you can be truly happy with both joy and sorrow in your life? Many of us say yes you can be! It's a fine line to walk on, and you will most likely have to try harder than ever before, but true happiness is definitely attainable for each and every one of us. Just look around! There are so many happy people (and other beings!) trying to help heal the world and spread a universal love, but their voices are being outshadowed by the cries for help and painful screams of a dying global society and the ecosystem in which it is sustained. Are you struggling to find happiness in the battle of importance between the evolution of society and economy? What do those words even mean to you?

As a fellow human who's also fighting this battle to my own capacities, I truly believe we all have the same potential in regards to 'attaining' the states of happiness most of us desire. But all too often do we find ourselves lost in amidst the chaos of our world, and it's hard not to feel lost when we all feel so deeply, but also struggle to connect with each other on an emotional level. From what I've seen in my short time here, I've found this struggle to connect is usually due to diferences of opinion, lifestyle choices, personal preferences and/or experiences, and some of us as individuals who simply don't want to out of laziness and/or fear(whatever that fear may be.) To put it in other words, we all experience both pain and pleasure in its many different forms, maybe not for all the same reasons, but definitely because we're all part of the same human experience..

Are you still following? Or have you decided this is a bunch of cow plop and don't really want to continue cause you've heard it all before and decided you don't have the time? What made you want to read this in the first place? Was it because you were drawn to the word happiness? Was it because it was a question you felt applied to you personally? Was it because it was a question in general? Or were you on 'auto pilot' and just clicked the first thing you saw? Maybe you may have even just stumbled upon it by chance? Regardless of your answer, you're here because you chose to be on the internet for some reason, and found yourselves here in one way or another. Maybe it's a want to connect with something? Or to feel something other than boredom, numbness or loneliness? Maybe it's something much more complex than that? Whatever the reason, I sincerely thank you for making it this far..

If you should be interested enough to keep reading, I'll pose to you yet another another question; If we can all agree we're human, does that necessarily mean we agree on our humanity? We certainly don't all agree on how it should function, that's as clear as it will ever be. In saying that though, we're getting there slowly and surely, but I still see so many 'good ideas'(generally speaking) getting lost in translation or being ignored completely for selfish and/or superficial reasons. Is it a matter of our own personal importance, or are we frightened of any unforseen 'consequences' maybe? Maybe it's something else? I can't answer that question for everyone, only for myself.

Many of those who are trying to help heal the world and 'fight fear,' are all around us and can come in many different forms in our daily lives(such as some of our peers/companions, animals, music, literature and poetry, just to name a few..) Are we simply just choosing to ignore the messages that have been sent already? Do we understand the ones that continue to be sent? Do we even realize they are message in the first place? Instead of listening, might we be using the messengers gifts for our own personal gain/pleasure instead of taking it as wisdom? Are we understanding them from a universal perspective, or a personal one? Or might we possibly be listening to too many insincere messages? It's up to us as individuals to answer these questions for ourselves along our life journey.

Regardless of geographical location, culture, experiences and situations etc.. We all still have the freedom of thought don't we? With that also comes the freedom of choice, but I see too many souls suffering at the hands of darkness because they feel they have no other options. Are we just too scared of the unknown to make the more ambiguous and/or ambitious choices maybe? If it is, or has the potential to be life changing, it's almost always garunteed to manifest itself physically as a feeling of fear and/or anxiety and can leave us feeling quite 'stuck' can't it? But as the great Ms. Cacie says in one of her songs ("What Scares Us") ".. we can't change what scares us, we can only change how it makes us feel.." In other words, it's up to the individual to decide how they feel about their situation regardless of age, stature, location, situation and/or position in life. A good example of this(and you'll know what I'm talking about if you have and/or are around them a lot) is children.. It can be quite frustrating when someone is doing the exact opposite of what you said would ensure theirs and/or others welbeing in the first place can't it? Is it because you fear for their health and/or safety? Or maybe because you're worried they might spill something on the sofa you just cleaned, making you frustrated(a feeling most of us try to avoid)? Everyone feels fear to some extent, and for many different reasons. Sometimes some of us just need a bit of help letting go of those worries and fears, maybe with some wise words and/or comforting acts of kindness? We each have our own way of dealing with things. We just need to remember that help may not always come in the ways we want it, but the help we all need is available if we look hard enough to find it..

If you feel the above doesnt really apply to you at all in regards to 'life changing' situations, do you feel a(sometimes intense) sense of excitement or anticipation instead of fear/anxiety? I thought so.. And if neither of the above apply to you, then do you really care if you or humanity lives or dies? Should you, even if you wanted to? That's up to you as an individual to decide, but I hope you find happiness regardless of your answer..

I've learnt a lot from this ever changing, beautifully bittersweet, chaotic world. As I've discovered over the course of my life, for me(and I assume many others) these two feelings of anxiety and excitement are almost exactly the same and extremely difficult to differentiate a lot of the time. These two feelings can also be replaced by a sense of numbness if I've pushed myself too far past either one. So if you can relate to my experience, and if we have the potential to experience all three, which do we give in to? Wich ever one we feed I guess..

There's always going to be positivity and negativity in the world, there's always going to be death and life, good and evil, and if we push ourselves too hard(like many of us do) we will almost always end up feeling a sense of allround numbness or pain.. A healthy balance of excitement, fear and nothingness is necessary to learn what it's like to be in a human body and test your limits, but we must avoid pushing ourselves into states of numbness and/or disrepair too often or it starts to consume us.

Do you push yourself too hard? Do you go beyond your limits to the point you start breaking down physically and/or mentally? Or maybe you don't push yourself hard enough and have found you've been stuck in the same place for most of your life? Do you want to move from where you are in life? Are you content with where and who you are in life? Could you be happier than you are right now?

How hard are you willing to try to be happy? Or is it just easier to feel pain and be pitied/helped all the time maybe? Many of us don't realize that by being resilient to negativity in gener, means we may experience the same/similar pain, but we may not feel hurt by it as much. It becomes a part of our lives that we process, instead of a pain in our butts that we try to get rid of(pardon the pun.)

So why do so many of us give in to the pain? What is it doing to our society? What does a child turn out like when their parents give into every whim and want no matter how self destructive? What are we as a society teaching our children about happiness and where it comes from? Are we teaching them to search for it out in the world, or to look for it within themselves? Are we even teaching them anything at all or is it all just 'monkey see monkey do'? I can't answer that for anyone either, I've not lived the same life.

So, at this point, many of you are probably asking something like 'is there any way around 'pain' without blocking it completely or giving into it then?' Or maybe you already know the answer to that yourself?

If you don't have an answer and/or are looking for some guidance, you're welcome to my perspective/personal experience.. I do believe its possible to move past pain, it's just hard to' 'accomplish' and most people don't like to hear the sometimes harsh honesty along the journey(let alone put in the extra effort to heal in some/severe cases). In saying that, if you're still here and eading and following along, I appreciate the patience, time and effort you're putting into this, you're doing great, not long now I swear!

A good example was given to me by a family member in regards to blocking vs rehabilitation, I will adapt it to be easier to follow along, but it can be applied across a large number of medical and/or mental illnesses and/or life stresses in general: Let's say you severely hurt your hip, knee and/or back in an accident (or due to RSI.) The Dr can give you meds to temporarily stop/relieve the pain, but unless you go through the effort of physio or rehabilitation, the problem will never really be helped or have the potential to fully heal. In saying that though, sometimes even after going through the extra efforts of physical rehabilitation, you may find the issue still won't be fixed. Usually when this happens you're given the option of medication and/or operation. This is another time where you get to choose to either endure or give in(except in extremely severe cases where a delicate balance of all three is required to yield maximum positive results) Which would you do if you had the choice to stop the pain temporarily for the rest of your life, or endure slightly more pain for a chance to heal for good? In other words.. Would you endure the potential 6months painful bed rest while your stiches/internals heal? Or would you just go get a 'magic pill' that makes your brain think the problems not there until it gets worse again? Which do you think would yeild the most positive results? Just remember, one requires large amounts of patience, resilience and effort, and can possibly heal you for good.. The other is just a quick fix for now until it comes back again, and possibly worse than before..

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myletterstoyoumrzubair · 7 years

Text

Edition 7 070317

Dear Mr Z edition 7 070317

Dear Hassan

As you know I went to the pub to celebrate my Uncle Alan’s birthday today. We all had a great time, my sister, her fiancé, my nephew my nana and grandad were there too. I have some good news for you. It appears I am gaining confidence about openly talking about our relationship with others. I have even told my mum yesterday that I want and need her to get used to this because you don’t plan on going anywhere. My sister even knows now that you want to find a way so that we can be together, and live together. Even if you have to move to Leicester briefly you seem to want to find a way for us to live together after. My sister thinks I am a very lucky lady. I am actually proud to be able to say that you are my boyfriend and that we are going to be together. Every time I end up talking about you or us, my face just lights up and the biggest of smiles appears out of nowhere. Yes, I am worried and scared for us that we still may end up thousands of miles apart and I honestly don’t think that fear will go away until we know for sure you don’t have to go anywhere, but I know that we are going to do all we can and try our best to make sure that what we want and desire the most comes true. I am so grateful that you are in my life, and such a special part of it. By the way, when we were leaving the pub, my nana asked so ‘so when are we going to meet this boyfriend of yours’. Yep, my nan wants to meet you, and so does my nephew. When I asked my nephew if he wants to meet you, he said ‘yes’ and nodded. My nephew like to meet people. As for my nan, when my nan asks to meet the man in my life, to me means she wants to get to know you. I don’t think I should even hide that we are together anymore. It is something that I have been doing with my family because I was worried about what they would think, but now I have started to open up and saying that you are my boyfriend, people seem to want to know about it all, and want to meet you. It’s like people want to accept that I have a man in my life, and that I am actually happy. No-one yet has said anything bad except mum. But mum is the person who i am worried the most about this, but even that we know we made a breakthrough when I managed to get her to agree to meet you, despite her doubts and worries. Her main worry is that ‘he doesn’t have leave to remain’. She keeps mentioning whenever you come up in conversation and each time i make it clear that she shouldn’t judge you based on that and that you are actually a lovely man.

Today I started massively opening up to my sister about this. I actually wanted to try and get some advice from her, not for any reason other than I wanted to know that she will be behind me. As far as my sister is concerned I should do whatever makes me happy, and that I shouldn’t worry about what others think. I even asked her what if mum doesn’t accept this. She basically told me well that is her problem then, and that I shouldn’t let it all stop me doing what I want. I asked her if you asked to marry me (she doesn’t know that I already said yes to you) and if I said yes would she come. She said if she could afford to. I basically said to her don’t worry, if it happened I would try get her and my nephew an outfit, maybe a mini suit red bow tie and red converse style shoes. She said am I gonna try dress him like Dr Who then lol. She was then saying she should have a say in what she wears. At that moment I thought she must be joking and told her that its likely to be either an Asian saree or lengha or a 1950s Lindy Bop dress. She said she doesn’t like dresses and would rather wear hareems, I told her no way, lol. Her idea of hareems made me think of Aladdin, or Ali Barbar and the forty thieves. LOL! I aint having Ali Barbar at my wedding xD. I asked my sister would she mind having a Pakistani brother in law. She basically said ‘why would it matter’. I told my sister there are only 2 ways that you can stay here, either go home and get a 6 month working visa, or 2 get married, and then get a family persons visa. I also said this makes it complicated because there is no garuntee that we won’t at some point have to part due to legalities. She knows that I have told you before I would never marry just so you can stay here, even if that means for a while we end apart, even though that is what I fear the most right now. I also sometimes worry that people may think I want to marry you just so you can stay, even though I know the truth, which is I want to be with you. She also knows it is not unusual for marriage proposals to happen, not in the western way waiting years and years before marriage is even considered, but more how it was here in the UK back in the 1950s and prior, sometimes only weeks or a few months. I don’t think my nana heard most of this conversation because she was sitting on another table. There were too many of us to be able to all sit together in the pub, so she was sitting nearby. As it stands no-one except us know we are getting married, but i am slowly trying to get people used to the fact you are a part of my life and you are not wanting to go anywhere, you only want to be wherever I am. My sister even suggested does that mean i would end up training as a midwife in Pakistan. I told her that Pakistan can get to like 50 degrees in the heat of summer and that there is no way i’d cope in that.

My sister fiancé said that the government would likely check that the relationship is real because people in the past have married to ensure that people can stay. He also said that the legal ceremony of marriage is really the only thing that matters, and that if you asked me to marry you ‘cos you want to be with me that we could even have a ceremony at a party, not a legal one, but one to allow people to be a part of it. This comment only came up because we were talking about average waiting times before getting marriage proposals, and how it can be different to here.

Later, when it was just my sister and I, in primark, (my sister should of never took me in primary cos i was supposed to be at uni working on my assignment, and for that short time instead i was basically trying only loads of high heels lol!) my sister admitted that mum can really wind my sister up the wall due to mums preconceived ideas about things, and I totally known what she means, in some ways I agree with her. I also tried my best to explain to her the idea and concept of obedience and roles of men and women in Pakistan style relationships. I said to her that men see it as their responsibility to look after and provide for their wives, and technically women don’t have to do anything other than show respect and be grateful for what their husbands do for them, and honour their relationship. I told her it’s completely awesome, cos you just want to love me and look after me, like it used to be here in the early 20th century and before, but as well as the idea that women still can contribute if they want to. i also explained that women are treated like princesses and queens that that all women are looked up and respected, and that it is not unusual for men to call unmarraigable women by the term ‘sister’ or ‘aunty’. My sister told me that she would rather be called sister than aunty, but she should explain to you what she would want to be called when she finally meets you. My sister is curious to whether you would want to hang out with my nephew, maybe go round to hers and meet her and my nephew. after all, although she doesn’t know it, you will end up being my nephew’s uncle. My sister knows you have many nephew’s and nieces, and that you want children too. It seems for sure that my sister will accept you as being a part of my life. I just hope that the rest of my family do the same.

I honestly never have spoken about us so openly and honestly to anyone. So, in short I am gaining in confidence about us, and I don’t care what people think. If people decide to have issues with this relationship, it is their problem because they are going to have to get used to us. I love you so much and I don’t want anything to stop this, I don’t want anything to stop us being together. I am really proud of us and I am really glad that you and I want the same things and that we are both fighters. I know we have a really large mountain to climb before we can finally be together properly, but we have started our ascent, even if it is a step at a time it is certainly progress. I know that I personally will have to find a lot of patience. I know that I am usually a patient woman, but when it comes to this for some reason, right now I have very little and I am rather stressed about it all, but I know if it does go the way we want, it will certainly be worth it in the end. My life, our lives will be set in stone. Our future and our story, together.

I love you

Shelly x

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