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#(covid isnt that bad here)
allyennah · 5 months
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What up, I got the covid.
If things are sporadic and unhinged this week... well that's the fever and brain fog. Sorry in advance.
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#im sorry but sometimes it really... gets to me how ppl dont even mask indoors most of the time (outside of their home i mean.in publicspace)#not even with some cloth mask with a cool pattern or whatever#honestly? ive been too slack on precautions too#i need to try harder. i do not try hard enough. and i should. i have to do a better job#at some point i was even wearing disposable gloves every time i had to touch anything outside... i was very very careful for a while#but ive become too relaxed like a lot of other ppl :( i criticize other ppl for not masking and yet...i dont do enougheither huh! hypocrite#also? tbh now i hardly can exist without a mask. any mask#like i absolutely must have a mask on when im close/around other ppl or indoors (outside of home)#im not saying this as a pat on my own back - its just a curious side effect of all this#i cant stand when my face is visible to others. my mouth and nose must be covered#when i have a video call at home i feel weird - im not in a mask. bizarre#also if there are cams etc - they dont get to record my face yay! or well at least half of my face#yes im sure i can be recognized either way but i feel safer this way. more comfortable. more private#but anyway a certain person here in my surroundings got covid it seems... of course i will likely get it too if i havent yet.#it doesnt matter that we're both vaccinated... it doesnt matter if the illness goes without symptoms...#its still... bad. i wish to avoid it as much as possible... i dont want my health to go down. ive got enough health problems#and yes Maybe some of them r caused by anxiety. and so... what? getting covid again and again still isnt good and i dont need my problems t#worsen. and as for my covid related fears -#im aware i have anxiety problems. and health anxiety problems especially. especially as of the last... idk whatever#but i hate being brushed off as just being anxious 'even if the anxiety is based on objective truth'. it makes me so mad!#i havent had therapy in... some time. been unable to have it. ill finally have some soon. i might end up ranting about all this#idk man. covid IS a serious ongoing issue. its not 'paranoia'. ugh. sorry its just something im mad about#even if my anxiety can be REALLY out of control attimes...you cant tell me that a lot of it isnt justified. sorry but it'd be a lie...#so in this case what i need? tools/help/meds to manage my anxiety. AND tools/help/etc to manage the actual issue#NOT just manage anxiety and IGNORE the issue. NO#idk im ranting. this is a vent essentially. please dont take it to heart too much#log
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comradecowplant · 8 days
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so things are not going well with my new elderly socdem friend unfortunately.
#she said this RIGHT after talking about how bad yt misinfo is... which she followed up w SO I WAS WATCHING A YT DOC ABOUT WW2 & LEARNED THIS#youtube 'historians' are literally the most fascist breed of youtuber. avoid the vast majority like the plague lmao#i asked if the video was sourcing the hollow dahmer & the black book of communism & she didnt seem to know what those are lol#to her credit i told her straight up that she was incorrect & she at least faked being curious about doing more research but i am doubting#she also 'learned' that lenin killed trotsky lol get your propaganda right lenin was dead by then STALIN icepicked him <3#anyway im making jokes bc the worst part was a different conversation where she spoke positively of israel#THAT'S gonna be the one to ruin our friendship. fuck you & your war tourist friend who fought in the 1960s landgrabs that youre now#telling me as if this is a cute story. nahhhh lmao i looked her straight in the eye & said i will NOT debate this#so she dropped it like the true enlightened centrist most socdem cowards are and i kept cleaning her house quietly#turns out You & Me We're the Only Ones Around Here Who Aren't Complete Fools was premature *kicks the poorly rendered gravel sadly*#shes otherwise a nice lady & i know i need to be more flexible in order to hopefully change ppls minds...#but also when people say awful & untrue things it makes me not want to talk to you 🤷‍♂️ srry 2 b a freak like that#also i know shes not transphobic but i havent sniffed her out well enough to know if shes safe to come out to#so its hours of misgendering (which isnt her fault she doesnt know) bc shes obsessed with neoliberal feminism and inappropriately brings#gender into conversations that it does not belong in#'did you know all the countries that handled covid best were ran by women?' 1) untrue 2) dont care finland still sucks#she also tried to tell me that european rich people learned to be nicer after the french rev & thats why europe is better than america...#girl shut up we learned how to be so good at racism and capitalism BECAUSE of europe. there is no such thing as a good rich person!!!#i pick my battles (genocide & anticommunist genocide revisionism) so i let her cook w that one & was not left convinced as you can imagine#ANYWAY rant about today's weird day done. gonna smoke weed & rim some skies 🥵 while listening to the Khrushchev Lied audiobook i found 😘
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soldier-poet-king · 11 months
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3rd??? 4th??? Monday in a row crying at work
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orcelito · 1 year
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Great to know my mind can still break by someone standing a Little too close to me for a Little too long
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loudanqueer · 1 year
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I cannot believe I actually am sick again like what the fuck. The timing of this. absolute bullshit.
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modern-oedipus · 2 years
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Feeling so overwhelmed. I hope we can see better days soon.
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weabooweedwitch · 2 years
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I stg... I've gone this whole pandemic never not wearing a mask in public until extremely recently and those few exceptions are for only when im eating in a restaurant or something and I swear to God there's an elderly military vet with a power chair and a non-neutered non-service dog who sounds like he's got straight up emphysema or something who sat down basically right next to me 💀 like sir thank you for your service but cover your fucking mouth, we're fighting the war on disease today
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saulbaby · 2 years
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Iiiiiiii have appendicitis
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qoldwater · 11 months
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wyvernwinds · 1 year
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i dislike my job more by the day
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AITA for yelling at my husband for spending "my" money for a part?
My husband stalks the actual AITA reddit so I am using my friend's account here as she has shown me these.
I (25m) have a husband, Liam (25m), and we have a daughter (just turned 2). When I first married Liam, I truly loved him, but I'm not sure now. We have ups and downs and I suffered from postpartum depression and I know Liam has said i was a handful then.
We are almost at five years of marriage. When we got married I had a job, which I left when me and Liam moved for his promotion across the country. Liam encouraged me to stay home and watch our dogs, which then translated to watching our daughter after we had her. I have tried to get a job multiple times, for example I had an interview and missed it because our car wouldn't start (Liam worked on it when he got home thst night and fixed it, but they wouldn't let me interview again). One time we all came down with covid. Just normal life things that occur.
Liam has discouraged me from getting a job, saying he makes enough to support us and wants me to be with our daughter. I do love being with her, but I feel unfulfilled and want to work. I tried to sell stuff online, but we decided it was too expensive to continue. Liam finally agreed for me to get a job, I got an interview and they offered me the job, but I just found out I am pregnant. The job is very labor intensive and my first pregnancy was not easy, Liam doesn't want me to accept and I am inclined not to, but I want to earn my own money.
Well, our heater unexpectedly went out and we had to pay for the part to fix it. Except, instead of using the joint account he used my account. Liam told me that it is his money and he can spend it how he pleases. I yelled at him that I would have money if I was able to get a job, and he told me I was being too hormonal because of the baby and needed to look at things logically. I told him to fuck off. I said some other things in anger, and I'll be honest i don't remember exactly what I said but i didnt think it was that bad, but Liam won't tell me. He says it was absolutely terrible and i must not love him to say what I did and that my brain fog is just me blaming the pregnancy. He has since slept in the guest room while I sleep in our room. I apologized for yelling but told him I still wanted a job, he says that isnt a real apology. AITA?
My friend says to add this here for context:
We have three accounts, they all are joint accounts. The first is a checking which is what we take our rent, bills, etc out of and what the part should have come out of. Then we have the first saving account which is his account. Then there is the second checking account which is considered mine. He puts money in it weekly for me to spend on groceries and our daughter. Anything extra I don't spend I get to keep.
What are these acronyms?
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transmutationisms · 3 months
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is it unfair for me to hold anger at individuals, or criticize individuals, if covid minimization is not the result of individualized choices but mass messaging and systems at work? im not really sure what to say to leftists who ive spoonfed information who have still decided to “move on” from it, including in their activism. on one hand i understand how they got here, on the other it feels like theyre enacting violence, in the same vein as like misgendering or supporting “blue lives matter” but with the added bonus of them maybe also harming someone directly by refusal to do infection control. i really need to shift my perspective away from a heavily trauma-informed one and start living in the real world where i cant expect anyone to advocate for me, and have to find more systems-based ways to advocate for myself, and releasing some of that anger might need to be a part of moving on from that pov, but a lot of that trauma *is* individualized and resulted from the way people have responded to me, which varies from lukewarm apathy to actively telling me my life isnt worth anything to them. at the same time, it’s impossible for me to feel like i’m not the one in the wrong, when it’s very few people left who care about any of this. sorry for dumping this on *you*, im aware you’re some guy online, but the only ppl i see who still talk about covid are ppl in the same situation as me and are too close to it to assess, or think about it purely on an individual level
i don't think there's anything wrong, bad, or unfair about feeling this type of anger or betrayal. i just also think that this is one of those situations where a (completely understandable) emotional reaction does not form the basis of an effective political platform. both of these things can be true at once; your ethical considerations when navigating interpersonal relationships are not the same as the ethical considerations for someone who wants to style themselves a public health communicator. in an epidemiological sense, a person who reluctantly masks because orgs and public spaces have mask mandates is accomplishing the same thing, materially, as a person who happily masks because they care about their disabled comrades. in that sense there's no need for a public health strategy to focus on 'changing minds' and doing so often just makes people dig in their heels more. but, on a personal level, of course it matters to you whether someone actually cares for you and protects you voluntarily! figuring out how to interact with people in your own life is just not the same as figuring out the most effective mass communication and public policy strategies; what irritates me about many of the twitter-sphere covid communicators is the elision between these two things. having said that, if i can just soapbox for a second:
i try to give these people the benefit of the doubt; i do think many of them mean well and think they are doing what's right. however, the strategy that many of them have coalesced around seems to go something like this: assume that others are not covid-cautious because they are insufficiently frightened; assume this is a failure of individual intelligence-slash-awareness; using the same datasets as the applicable public health agency, interpret all data with any number of assumptions, predictions, and modelling heuristics built in; generate very terrifying infographic, post it, and wring hands when doing so doesn't change anyone's behaviour or state policy.
even in the best of cases i simply think this is ineffective; i would say public attitudes about the seriousness of covid are much more a result of state and public health inaction, ambivalence, and denialism than they are a cause. additionally, interpreting data and making predictions based on them is woolly, and a lack of transparency about their methodology, plus the overconfident desire to present themselves as authorities on the internet, means that this strategy can and does end up producing its own distortions. see, for example, recent 'med twitter' claims that "covid is airborne aids", an attempt to scare people into taking it more seriously that relies on poor and overconfident interpretations of current immunological knowledge; that ends up distorting what we do actually know about covid and the immune system (which is already fucking scary! no lies needed!); and which, as far as i can tell, actually started picking up steam in early 2020 as a right-wing conspiracy theory centred around the claims of dr (not an md) leonard g. horowitz, who argues that covid is a laboratory-engineered virus and uses it in his efforts to sell "resonating silver hydrosol" supplements to you (and your pets!) as "an effective alternative to risky vaccinations and deadly antibiotics".
getting into bed with these people is patently dangerous for obvious reasons. i really do not blame people who are trying to find reliable covid information, and are rightfully wary of state and official sources that have been downplaying this virus for its entire existence, for getting sucked in by twitter doctors when those people are often the only ones who seem to be both posting statistics and taking the virus seriously. however, what i have observed leads me to believe that, firstly, many of these people are motivated by a desire for renown and fame as much as by altruism (welcome to social media). secondly, virtually all of them are fundamentally very liberal in their politics, and this shows in the way they interpret the current state of affairs as a result of individual actions and psychological failures, rather than capitalist policy. this is absurd and leads to absolutely pointless (if not often counterproductive) narrativisation of political action as some kind of magical field where everybody just needs to change their minds and believe in the correct things really hard and then things will change: it's the liberal democratic fantasy that aggregated attitudes create policy out of thin air, no organisation or class analysis or principled communism necessary.
thirdly, a multitude of factors (incl. the paywalling and gatekeeping of knowledge) means that, although state and official interpretations of their datasets are often misleading or outright dishonest because they want to minimise risk, too often the self-styled 'covid communicators' online are not a solution to this and are prone to their own fallacious assumptions, conspiratorial thinking (see again: understanding politics as the product of many individuals believing something really hard, with no analysis of structural factors), poor data analysis, issues with comprehensive data collection in the first place (same as state sources. because they are usually using the same datasets), and a particular rhetorical emphasis on "listening to the science" that often manifests practically as a failure to actually engage with scientific methodology or to questionor improve it where it is lacking, incomplete, or bias-reproducing.
so. these are my issues with the state of covid communication; to me the question of how to navigate interpersonal relationships with people who don't value your life enough to protect it is just very different and the emotional engagement there is also quite different.
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gaytanic-panic · 2 months
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how long did bottom surgery take from deciding to start?
so basically my friend @wallnoises got it and i was like huh thats a real thing i could get and then i met @reidio-silence irl and was like holy fuck this really is a real thing i could get and that was in november 2019 so i went online to here
and emailed a bunch of surgeons like hey who here would accept my insurance provider. Btw don't go with Kathy Rumer, she's infamously bad. An old tumblr friend got an ok result with her but I wouldn't risk it. I went to Dr. Praful Ramineni in Washington DC and he takes UnitedHealthcare insurance.
My consultation for him ended up being in January 2020, so not long after I decided to pursue bottom surgery. Then we scheduled the surgery date for a year from then, so January 2021. Thankfully we didn't have to cancel bc of COVID or anything. It was kinda surreal being in DC like, the week after the Jan 6 riots. The police caution tape was still up.
The surgery cost the full out-of-pocket maximum from my plan, which thankfully was only 1800. I spent a couple nights in the hospital which sucked so much ass I fucking hated staying in a hospital with an IV and catheter and all that crazy shit. Got out, was zonked on percocet at my airbnb in DC with my mom and then one of my gfs for a couple days, then @fishmech and @reidio-silence let me crash with them for like 2-3 weeks which I don't know if they understood why I wanted to convalesce with them given my surgery was in DC and they are in NY but they had hosted recovering girls before and like after surgery u are wrecked for like the following three weeks. They were fucking wonderful. Also I ordered so many goddamned overpriced bagels on doordash during that time.
Two big post surgery things to consider are the bleeding and not being able to cum for a while. Like your new pussy is going to be a bloody mess for a while so I went through a lot of those like, cheap drug store pull on diaper things. I promise this was not kink related bc like lord knows they were cute and i wasnt pissing in them I was just having all the periods I had missed in my life up to that point lol.
And after surgery you get so horny for that first week. I've seen some girls say that your T spikes right after surgery, with even some very intensely anti T girls being like "and thats why i stayed on spiro for the first month" but idk if that's true but it is true that you will feel horny and not be able to cum. Like I was not able to get myself off till like three months after surgery, so be prepared for that but also don't worry that you won't ever be able to orgasm again. You're almost certainly fine, ur cooch just has to stop being a bloody mess.
All in all with insurance vaginoplasty isnt the like, crazy expensive surgery you might imagine but it is something to financially plan for. Figure out your insurance's out of pocket maximum, add in the cost of a place to stay in town for a bit immediately after the surgery, make sure you have people who will look after you, and plan to not be able to be at work in person for like 3 weeks. Peak COVID era remote teaching really saved my bacon there.
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